0:01

I'm calling this short piece I'm

0:03

recording, Smell the Roses, or things

0:06

usually take longer than

0:20

they should take. As

0:22

I'm speaking right now, my wife and

0:24

I are renovating an apartment we

0:27

expected to move in two months

0:29

ago, and we

0:31

packed much of our stuff to be ready

0:33

for that. Now

0:35

if we're lucky, we could move

0:37

in two months from now. Whoops.

0:42

Hey, does any of the

0:44

following sound familiar? Oh,

0:46

of course the book is going to be done by

0:48

the summer. We'll have

0:50

our department restructured by

0:52

next quarter. We should

0:54

have our vice president of marketing by

0:56

October. We're launching

0:59

our new Apex product by year end. It

1:03

seems late and over budget

1:06

seems to be the norm for the

1:08

big projects we've all heard about and

1:10

probably been involved in. But

1:14

how many of our smaller and

1:17

personal endeavors just

1:19

seem to drag on with the finish

1:21

line continually shifting into

1:23

the future? But

1:26

it's tricky and sometimes even dangerous

1:28

to have our happiness or satisfaction

1:31

too tightly tied to the success

1:34

of these future outcomes we've

1:37

committed to, to

1:39

the timelines we expect. You

1:42

know, when involved in an operational

1:44

system for our company where we

1:47

don't want to do too much predicting and

1:49

controlling because life is going to change and

1:51

we need to course correct rapidly. You

1:55

know, the universe seems

1:57

to be definitely merciful in

1:59

that it's been arranged so that we

2:01

really aren't allowed to see everything

2:04

in all their gory

2:06

details. We're going to have to endure

2:09

to complete anything of any consequence

2:11

in our life and work. Come

2:15

on, if you had really known

2:17

ahead of time what was going to

2:19

be involved in how many things you've

2:21

thrown yourself into over the years, how

2:25

many of you would have just said, no

2:27

way. If

2:29

you hadn't really been love blind, would

2:32

you have really entered into that relationship?

2:36

Would you have partnered with that person or

2:39

those people or that

2:41

company? If you

2:43

had been truly, duly diligent and

2:46

assessed all of the potential risks, if

2:49

you had known for real what was really going to

2:51

be involved in redoing

2:54

your kitchen, would

2:56

you have even started? And

3:00

imagine if you had known what

3:03

life was going to throw at you. Would

3:05

you have even decided

3:07

to be born had you had the choice?

3:12

But then what would you have

3:14

missed? The

3:16

experiences, the learnings,

3:19

the growth, the

3:21

maturity, the ability to

3:24

express all the interesting

3:26

and creative and serendipitous

3:29

things that showed

3:31

up along the way. There

3:34

are the gory details and yet what

3:38

about the glory details? I

3:41

walk a fine line between

3:44

identifying with the result of what

3:48

I'd like to achieve and just enjoying

3:51

the process of getting there. As

3:54

I've gotten older, out of necessity it seems,

3:57

I've had to learn to relax a lot about

4:00

the end result and its

4:02

timing and build in

4:05

more appreciation and fulfillment and just

4:08

moving forward toward it. That's

4:12

not to say that imagined

4:14

results and outcomes

4:17

and expected completion dates are

4:19

unnecessary. Quite the contrary, they

4:23

somehow are a natural extension of our

4:26

creative energy that wants to

4:29

express and manifest

4:31

ourselves into this world and

4:35

getting its cooperation in the process of that,

4:37

especially if there are other people involved. But

4:40

I found it to be tricky business

4:42

to stay identified with

4:44

the bigger me that's just engaged in

4:47

the process of living and doing and

4:50

the other me that gets wrapped

4:53

around some future

4:55

event or success that might

4:57

make me feel somehow unworthy

5:01

unless it is achieved and

5:03

I complained then about

5:05

the unfairness of the universe if

5:09

it doesn't show up in my

5:11

timing or to my liking. In

5:15

coaching project or departmental teams

5:17

over the years, I've

5:19

often challenged them to clarify the

5:22

values or principles that

5:24

they want to pay attention to in doing

5:27

the work together. Typical

5:31

answers would be, hmm, yeah

5:33

we want high quality, good

5:35

customer service, timeliness,

5:39

keeping agreements, alignment

5:41

with corporate mission, etc.

5:45

What seldom shows up in their

5:48

own thinking are

5:50

things like have fun and

5:53

ensure that we're all using the

5:56

project to develop ourselves personally and

5:59

professionally. Most

6:02

people and teams actually do

6:04

consider these or would

6:06

consider these kinds of standards important. I've

6:10

worked with a few companies that actually

6:14

had fun as one of

6:16

its primary corporate values.

6:20

Though they are seldom acknowledged or

6:24

policed, wait a minute,

6:28

we're not having fun. What do we need

6:30

to do to do more that's

6:33

more fun? And these parameters

6:36

are the ones that can make a

6:38

project more meaningful all

6:40

along the way. Even

6:43

if it's canceled, and many are, morale

6:46

has not been totally hinged on

6:50

some precarious future completion. I'll

6:55

bet that your fondest memories

6:57

will include as many vignettes

7:00

about the process of getting

7:02

somewhere as being

7:04

at the destination. Anyway,

7:09

I've had to remind myself lately with

7:12

so many seriously important

7:14

projects that are taking a

7:17

lot longer than I'd hoped

7:19

to get done. It's just

7:22

a way cool journey, dude. So

7:25

we don't move into our apartment until

7:27

two months from now. So

7:30

what? Getting ready itself is kind of fun.

7:34

Or as the late creative

7:36

Italian filmmaker Federico Fellini

7:39

said, There is

7:41

no end. There is no beginning.

7:44

There is only the infinite passion of

7:46

life. you