Helmet, jumpsuit, maybe a catheter: these are the things we needed to hop behind the wheel of Alistair MacLean's The Way to Dusty Death, and it's at the very least possible that they are the things you'll need to have in place before you pop your clutch and try to slip behind the fastest cats on the track (that's us) as they (we) set track records, lap after lap.

The big bells are ringing and the tight pants are clinging, because this tale of speedy intrigue on and around the tracks of Formula 1 Grand Prix racing is probably the 70s-est artifact that ever slid through Europe's hotels. A few pit stops may be in order, so that you don't get too tired. Anyway, if you're like Racer X Johnny Racecar Harlow's accelerator, then you're ready for this episode, because you're ready to get ... floored.

Recommendations:

• Moe Bowstern of the Fisher Poets Gathering
• Watching Columbo
• The Trauma Floor by Casey Newton, photos by Jessica Chou
• "Which One of My Garbage Sons Are You?" on Clickhole

Music:

• "Jesus Built My Hotrod" by Ministry
• "Racer-X" by Big Black