0:04

Hey, so I need to tell you a little story.

0:06

Okay, I hope it's a food heist because we forgot

0:09

to have a food heist in our food episode. No, we did

0:11

the food heist. We did the Chick-fil-A oil. Oh, we did.

0:14

We did. Okay, I forgot.

0:15

Okay, good. Yeah. I

0:18

do have a food heist and I also have a story about this voodoo

0:20

doll over my shoulder. Your voodoo doll that

0:22

looks like a Tim Burton inspired-

0:24

Yeah, he's a very cute Tim Burton-y little

0:26

voodoo doll.

0:27

A few weeks ago on

0:31

Saturday or so, no, it was a Monday

0:33

morning. I was at home. The

0:36

depression was pretty bad and

0:38

I was just kind of laying there and then my

0:40

dogs barked and screamed because that's what

0:42

they do any time a delivery guy comes.

0:45

I went out and there

0:47

was a box with no return

0:51

name or label on it. I opened it up.

0:54

There wasn't anything inside, no receipt,

0:56

no gift receipt, no name of

0:58

this person sent this to you. It was

1:00

completely unidentified. I opened

1:03

the little thing and

1:04

it was voodoo dolls,

1:06

two voodoo dolls looking like

1:09

that. They're little incense burners.

1:11

I'm like, who on earth sent

1:14

me voodoo dolls in the mail without

1:16

identifying themselves? It really kind of creeped

1:18

me out. I boxed them up,

1:20

put them back in the thing and I'm like, I

1:23

don't know what to do about this. Then

1:25

my mom texted me at night and said, hey, did you get the care package

1:27

I sent you? You looked sad

1:30

yesterday so I sent you some voodoo

1:32

dolls. I

1:34

don't know. What you're saying is it's

1:37

a whole family thing. Yeah. This.

1:40

Oh, 100%. If you wonder why I

1:42

am the way I am, it's my mom.

1:45

I don't know your parents. You've never met

1:47

them?

1:48

I might have met. You might not have

1:50

because my mom has MS and has basically

1:53

been bed bound since I was a kid.

1:56

She is, however, hilarious

1:58

and she has a very dark.

1:59

sense of humor. A couple weeks

2:02

ago my high school best friend's mother

2:04

passed away and we were at

2:06

the funeral. So I was texting my

2:09

parents and you know I cracked a joke or two about

2:11

the kind of casket I'll get them for their

2:14

funeral. And my

2:16

mom said you don't need to get us a casket

2:19

for the funeral and I'm like what are you talking

2:21

about? And then I said who

2:23

do you think is gonna die first? Because you know I

2:25

asked creepy questions and my

2:27

mom said we're both going

2:30

out together and there won't be anything

2:32

left to bury. So I

2:34

don't know what she's got planned but

2:37

I'm kind of excited to see. If I told

2:39

this story about when I took Dallin, my

2:41

middle son, to my grandmother's funeral.

2:44

Is this the hands? Yeah. Where's

2:46

the hands? Yep that he was mad that there weren't hands

2:48

coming out of the grave. He's got a

2:51

sensibility like unto yours. But he was

2:53

like fine. He was so

2:56

mad. He's ahead of his time. Yeah so

2:58

mad that there are no actual zombie hands coming

3:00

out of graves. Yeah. Well.

3:03

Do you want a food heist? I was just

3:05

gonna mention I'm glad that you got a voodoo

3:07

doll from your mom to help you feel

3:09

better. I brought him down because I ran

3:11

out of Funko Pops. I'm gonna

3:14

have more next time we record though because my son's

3:16

gonna use his. Okay. So I have

3:20

the voodoo doll in my office. I have not yet burned

3:23

incense in it because I don't know what

3:25

that's gonna do if everyone

3:27

in the house is gonna scream at me. Yeah.

3:30

But. Yeah ask Peter before you do that. Yeah.

3:35

If it bothers Adam I'm actually okay with that.

3:37

Yeah I mean who wouldn't be. That's a good general

3:39

rule actually. Okay

3:42

here's the food heist. Remember the horrible security

3:45

in our previous food heist? Yep. This

3:47

one if anything is worse. Wow.

3:49

You excited for this? I am. So this happened

3:52

October 6th is when the article came out. Somebody

3:56

in Philadelphia. The

3:58

city of brotherly love. broke

4:01

into a truck,

4:03

a shipping truck, in the middle

4:05

of the night and stole 184 cases

4:10

of crab legs. 184 cases? 184

4:13

cases of crab legs. Frozen or like fresh? I believe

4:17

they were frozen. Or were they crabs

4:20

and they're just like we only want the legs buds. Sorry,

4:22

it's gonna be the worst day of your life. Spent three

4:25

hours cracking them off. No, so

4:27

it was crab legs in clusters.

4:30

Crab leg

4:32

clusters.

4:33

Why is that so hard for me to say? Valued

4:35

at $73,000 stolen at around 1.30 a.m. Police,

4:42

by the time they arrived on the scene the vehicles were

4:44

fleeing so they just like barely made

4:46

it out. They stole them out

4:48

of this big container on the back of the truck which

4:50

was locked with a metal seal and a padlock. But

4:53

here's the best part of the whole thing. The

4:55

driver of the truck was in

4:57

the cab asleep the

5:00

entire time. However

5:02

long it takes to unload 184 cases of crab legs is how long

5:07

this guy just slept through the whole thing. Maybe

5:09

in his defense they give this is a true ice.

5:11

Maybe they drugged him. They could have. Mm-hmm.

5:14

My immediate thought was like last time

5:16

maybe he's just an inside man and

5:19

he's like I'm sorry I slept through the last

5:21

four hours. Do you suppose they were stealing

5:24

the crab legs to return them to their rightful owners? This

5:27

is like Doctors Without

5:29

Borders. Yep there's just a couple thousand crabs

5:32

out there. They're like they're like help

5:34

us. Hope we'll go get your legs back. Someone

5:37

is doing an underground crab

5:39

surgery ring. Yep. Returning

5:43

the legs to those poor crabs. But

5:48

that's awesome because prior to

5:50

them returning the crab legs they

5:53

have prosthetics and so it's just a bunch

5:55

of crabs walking around on little pirate peg

5:57

legs. Yeah they get six pegs each. Yeah.

6:00

That's that's gotta be what it is. I have

6:02

only had crab once really my life

6:05

was when I was in Korea and A

6:08

lot of seafood out there and I'd never had crab

6:10

I'd had shrimp and prawns and things like

6:12

that and I'm like, all right fine You

6:14

know, I'm gotta try it and

6:17

I did not like it at all

6:19

Really because you know what kind of crab like

6:21

they were whole crabs. Okay.

6:24

Oh, the little one the little one the smaller the

6:26

crab The less impressive that yeah,

6:28

where they soft shells. We were eating them with

6:30

chopsticks. Okay, grabbing the meat

6:33

out Oh, okay with chopsticks

6:35

and all I remember the experience

6:37

was number one. I didn't like it I didn't hate

6:40

it like crab was not as bad

6:42

as some of the other Seafood. Mm-hmm,

6:44

but there was one moment. We're like, oh you forgot

6:47

the brain and They

6:49

made me reach into the head and

6:51

pull out a piece of meat and eat it Sounds

6:54

awesome and Yeah, sorry

6:56

those of you at home those of you at home are

6:58

eating right now and I just described No, you

7:00

just described deliciousness was

7:03

forced to eat a crab brain But

7:05

yeah, not my favorite living in Mexico is

7:07

where I learned you eat a fish It's

7:10

got the head on it. You suck those eyeballs

7:12

out and you eat them too

7:14

and they're great

7:15

I'm done with this food. Hi, let's

7:17

move on Okay Let's

7:21

talk about are we doing this thing? Yeah, we're doing

7:23

the thing. Okay, so we want to talk about

7:26

superhero movies But but

7:28

like hipster superhero. Yeah from

7:30

way before they were cool because I rewatched

7:33

Superman the movie recently And they got me thinking about

7:36

Early superheroes, so we found a website.

7:38

It was the first Google result that yielded

7:41

what I was looking for Which is the chronological

7:43

list of all superhero and

7:46

comic book inspired movies So we'll

7:48

put that link in the description. Yeah, it is from you can

7:50

follow along flights tights and

7:52

movie nights calm Yeah, it looks

7:54

very Wikipedia, but it is not Yep,

7:58

my guess is having scans This

8:00

the ones that have hyperlinks to it are ones they've reviewed

8:03

and the ones that don't are ones they haven't yeah

8:06

So this starts in 1937 With

8:09

the shadow strikes It does not surprise

8:12

me in the least that two of

8:14

the first three on the list are the shadow

8:16

and Dick Tracy And I don't think they claim

8:18

this is comprehensive list. It's just what we found Yeah,

8:21

so so there might be an earlier comic

8:24

book or superhero type movie, but I

8:26

am not surprised at all for the shadow I haven't seen

8:28

this shadow. In fact, the first movie I've seen on here is 1963 oh

8:31

really 1937 but my dad The

8:36

shadow was his thing. He

8:38

loved the radio dramas hmm And

8:41

he talked about like that was his character

8:43

that he loved when he was a kid So when we

8:45

eventually get to the Alec Baldwin one, yeah,

8:47

I will have thoughts on that I am excited to

8:49

get to that point because I want to talk about how

8:52

old radio shows were suddenly super

8:54

popular in whatever year Yep, so

8:57

we have shadow. There's some really boring

8:59

titles on here. There's one called international

9:01

crime I'm like to be fair that sounds

9:03

awesome. That's it. But it's just not descriptive

9:06

I don't think that sounds awesome like international crime

9:09

national crime I wonder if there's an actual

9:11

superhero in it like are there books

9:13

that aren't international crime? Okay, it's not

9:15

a good title It's a good genre. Okay.

9:17

I'm a big fan of international crime Fiction

9:20

only we have the shadow

9:22

the missing lady Which is also

9:24

like the missing late. So there's shadow

9:26

returns. There's the missing lady It jumps

9:28

from 37 pretty much up to 45. Yeah,

9:31

very quickly and we get several Dick Tracy's

9:34

we get several shadows The missing lady

9:36

another lazy title. Okay, how about

9:39

Dick Tracy meets gruesome? Well,

9:41

I'm sure these are all Dick Tracy comic strip

9:43

characters and they're probably all drawn

9:46

very interestingly And when I

9:48

was a kid, I don't know where we

9:50

had this where it is today But

9:53

I somehow found a comic

9:55

collection of old like 30s

9:58

and 40s era Dick Tracy Yeah, and

10:00

just read through them just years

10:02

and years worth of Dick Tracy, and I loved

10:04

them They were so cool, but

10:06

I don't remember anyone named gruesome well I

10:09

mean Emily has an Apple watch Dick

10:11

Tracy. Hey there we go. Yeah, okay,

10:13

all right and the adventures

10:15

of Jane It's

10:17

got to be like Jane Tarzan Jane,

10:20

but Tarzan wasn't on there. I'm very surprised that Tarzan

10:22

hasn't been on here Yeah, maybe they don't

10:24

count Tarzan as a superhero Or

10:27

a comic book like maybe not from an obvious.

10:29

I mean he isn't really considered one Yep,

10:32

so keep scrolling us. Let's get Superman

10:35

the mole man. I have heard of 51. That's

10:37

the first Superman on here It's the first Superman

10:39

I've heard of and then we get to

10:41

the Lone Ranger. Yep, and then

10:43

another Lone Ranger Santo.

10:46

Oh, okay 66 1962. That's

10:48

the first one I've seen there's a Mexican

10:51

one. So El Santo is like Arguably

10:53

the most famous luchador Okay

10:56

of all time and he had a ton of

10:58

movies made about him And I'm

11:00

glad they count him as a superhero because he was literally

11:02

a masked vigilante So Santo

11:05

versus Las Mujeres Vampiro aka

11:07

Samson versus the vampire They

11:10

translated El Santo into Samson for

11:12

English audiences. That's apparently but

11:14

you haven't seen it, right? No, I haven't seen that one

11:16

I haven't seen any Santo movies actually. All right,

11:18

so here's my first movie I do have to

11:21

tell you in my cyberpunk series because

11:23

it was said in the future I'm like, I'm just gonna

11:25

fill Los Angeles with the weirdest

11:27

names I can and so yeah, there's

11:30

an entire I think it was a Wharf

11:33

pier area loading dock that

11:36

was named after El Santo.

11:37

I was very proud of myself

11:39

Anyway to watch some of these movies. I know I

11:41

do I also had a university

11:44

that was named after Kenton plus who's

11:46

like the Mexican Charlie Chaplin Anyway, 66

11:48

66 first one I've seen is Which

11:52

one Batman the movie and the movie for all the 66

11:54

one. Yeah. Have you seen Batman the movie? The

11:57

one based on the TV series. Yep. Yes. I have

11:59

West shark And all yep,

12:01

sometimes you can't get rid of a bomb It

12:04

is a fantastic movie. It

12:06

is. I love that. Did you watch the TV

12:09

show? I've watched a lot of the TV show

12:11

Yeah, it was on after I got home from school even

12:14

though I was getting home from school in the late 80s

12:16

early 90s at that point and I

12:18

just I watched them all because Yeah,

12:21

I got the humor and And

12:24

it worked for me, but the movie is a great

12:26

level up on the TV show There's

12:28

good episodes of the TV show, but the

12:31

movie Really just knocks

12:33

it out of the park. Yeah, I remember Watching

12:37

it when I was pretty young Mm-hmm and

12:40

sometime around 9 10 11 years

12:42

old. I was talking about how stupid

12:45

people used to be in the 60s and My

12:49

parents are like what are you talking about and

12:52

I'm like, well Batman

12:54

like

12:55

You guys thought that was so cool and they're

12:57

like what? You thought we

12:59

took Batman seriously, and

13:02

that's when I learned Oh, okay It was intended

13:04

to be a joke I as a kid thought that

13:07

it was like they thought it was so cool

13:09

and edgy Because that's what Batman was

13:11

right in the 80s and 90s, but

13:14

no that's when I realized. Oh, this

13:16

was supposed to be funny But

13:18

highly recommended. All right. See what the next one we've seen

13:21

is let's scroll us Okay, there's

13:23

yeah, there's a bunch on here. We're just scrolling

13:25

past. Yeah, we don't know them Barbara, Ella never

13:28

seen it, but I do know of it. I have seen Barbara.

13:30

Yeah Well, not good. Okay.

13:33

I Actually know

13:35

almost nothing about it. Just that it's

13:37

like a famous sci-fi movie. It's intended

13:40

as a parody of modern

13:44

sexuality and misogyny,

13:46

okay, and so they

13:49

Go a little

13:50

far with it done in the 60s. Yeah, I'm sure

13:52

that's yeah. Yeah, that's a true.

13:55

Well All right,

13:57

we're hitting the 70s now

13:59

mr. F Freedom three Superman

14:01

in the jungle from Italy.

14:03

Okay. Nice. That's something I want

14:06

Superman in the gym three Superman in the jungle

14:11

I'm super intrigued. I would

14:13

love if that was also the plot Okay,

14:15

like nothing happened. It was just three Superman.

14:18

What is three Superman in the jungle? We have

14:20

to know on it I will let you know in a moment. Okay,

14:22

that's not hyperlink. So I need to you want

14:24

him to spoil it for us Do we want him to just find

14:27

a copy and we can watch it? No, I'm not watching

14:29

it. It's from Italy What

14:31

it could be real weird Italian

14:34

movies in the 70s could be real good. Yeah could

14:37

be real weird If it's like a Sergio

14:39

Leone spaghetti Western about

14:42

actual Superman in a jungle and there's

14:44

three of them Are you the also the scroller

14:47

for us Adams? No, yeah, Daniel. Okay,

14:49

Dan. There's two more Santo movies Tales

14:52

from the crypt in 72. Is that a

14:54

superhero movie comics tales from the

14:56

crypt was was the comic? Okay Do

14:58

you guys want to hear the entire

14:59

storyline? Yes

15:02

Three superheroes attempt to reclaim the stolen

15:04

lease of a uranium mine the

15:07

end

15:07

Okay, so it's just superheroes.

15:09

They're translating. Okay. Well,

15:12

there's two more on here three Superman

15:14

of the Orient three Superman of the West So

15:16

are they the three super the same three Superman

15:19

every time? Boy, we're

15:21

gonna have to dig just an anthology theories

15:23

about particularly super heroic

15:25

people. Mm-hmm three dev

15:28

Adam they don't have the only

15:30

check. So I think it's a very generic superhero.

15:33

Yeah, I just mean superhero to them Oh

15:35

Santo has a sidekick now Santo a blue

15:38

demon Contra Dracula

15:40

a lumber loco So

15:42

even the bad guy has a sidekick That's

15:45

awesome. That's amazing 74 has

15:47

Wonder Woman TV. I assume that's like a

15:50

TV movie from the old Wonder Woman

15:52

TV show Linda Carter Yep, have

15:54

not seen that Doc Savage haven't

15:56

seen any Doc Savage Yeah, we

15:58

completely skipped over Flesh Gordon we

16:01

did Flesh Gordon the list. Yeah,

16:04

not flash Gordon. We'll get to that. Mm-hmm a

16:06

bar the first black Superman from 77

16:09

Okay, it's got to be a black exploitation movie.

16:11

Right? Probably. Yeah, I have to assume

16:14

Okay, 78 had a doctor strange.

16:16

Okay TV movie. We're

16:19

getting to the second one that I've seen. Okay,

16:21

so 78 Superman Yes,

16:24

that's for read. That's Christopher Reeve. Okay, 78

16:27

Superman is Christopher Which are the one I just

16:29

watched right? It's gotta be Superman the movie. That's 78. Yeah.

16:32

Yeah and to this day 45 years

16:36

later, I think still one of the best

16:39

superhero movie. I watched it again two weeks

16:41

ago. Mm-hmm. It's really good Yeah, it

16:43

has a couple of problems the main

16:45

one being the ending. I think the ending is weak

16:48

That's the spin around and reverse

16:50

time, right? Yes. Yeah, and this is just you know,

16:52

it's a brand new thing inventing a new power like

16:55

so if you haven't seen Superman the movie he

16:57

is presented with actually a pretty

17:00

good theme this is classic great

17:02

Superman theming and the idea

17:05

is that his space father Has

17:07

said, you know, don't enter played by

17:09

Marlon Brando Marlon Brando's like don't interfere Don't

17:13

change the course of human history. Don't do too

17:15

much. You'll be a god to them So

17:17

prime direct of it. Yeah, and then you have

17:19

earth dad Potts Andrews like you're

17:22

here for a reason

17:23

you go help people right? There's part of

17:25

the reason why I hated Man of Steel Right. Yeah, there's

17:28

some great things about Man of Steel, but

17:30

you know, that's not one of them That's not

17:32

one of them and so Superman

17:34

is presented with this

17:36

Conundrum now they don't

17:37

do it enough justice because he shows

17:40

up as your man. He starts saving people immediately Mm-hmm.

17:42

And so the question of do I help them or

17:45

not? It's not really explored in

17:47

depth Yeah, but the ending is

17:49

am I gonna stop these nukes and

17:51

then he's also presented with the am I gonna stop the nukes?

17:54

Am I gonna save my girlfriend? Right? That's

17:56

the classic superhero dilemma and

17:58

he wasn't able to save his father So you kind

18:00

of got these themes where it's like, do I interfere?

18:03

Yes. The interfering

18:05

is saving the world. Saving my

18:07

girlfriend is maybe less interfering, but

18:09

also I need to go save the world. I'm Superman.

18:12

And he makes the choice to save the world, but it

18:14

costs this, right? And

18:17

then he just immediately invents a new power, flies

18:19

backwards around the earth, reverses time. A

18:22

power that is too powerful for any

18:24

superhero to really have and be

18:26

able to use, removes all consequences.

18:29

But most importantly, it removes the decision from

18:31

him. So I've got to fix. Okay.

18:34

I've got to fix Brandon's script notes. Let's

18:37

hear it.

18:37

Superman. So you fix both

18:40

of these things with a couple of scenes. Early

18:43

on,

18:44

when he's deciding if he's going to go save people, you

18:46

give him a moment where he's like, no, I can't just sit by

18:49

and let people be hurt. And he saves

18:51

like some construction workers, right? From

18:53

an accident, right? At the end,

18:56

they save Lois Lane. There's an earthquake.

18:59

The construction workers are there and he's

19:01

unable to save her because he needs to, you know,

19:04

go stop the nukes. But

19:07

then the good deed he did earlier,

19:09

he gets the best of both worlds without

19:11

breaking his character arc or

19:13

his powers. Yeah.

19:16

And it's great. Isn't that like, like you should

19:18

write for a living. Two little beats

19:21

in that movie. And it's just perfect.

19:23

I mean, the other flaw is a little harder

19:25

to fix. And I don't know if you need to because it's

19:28

from the era. It's that the bad guys

19:30

are not very menacing. No, really

19:32

buffooning. Gene Hackman and Ned Beatty,

19:35

both Oscar winners

19:37

and incredible actors, but they

19:39

really do play themselves for

19:42

laughs rather than for menace. But

19:44

at the same time, I do got to give

19:46

Hackman credit. That kind

19:48

of trolley problem is here.

19:51

I'm going to do two horrible things at the same

19:53

time. You can only stop one of them. That's the classic

19:56

Superman storyline. A

19:58

lot of people will say or they used to. to say, I think

20:00

this is not as popular an opinion anymore,

20:02

that Superman's not interesting because he

20:05

can do anything. But a

20:07

good Superman story is not

20:09

about can he beat

20:12

up this bad guy, because of course he can. A

20:14

good Superman story is what choice

20:16

is he gonna have to make when his principles

20:19

are on the line? Yep, and I think

20:21

just a little tweak. It's

20:24

still, I enjoyed every

20:26

moment, this is still like a nine out of 10 movie

20:28

for me. Maybe some of that's nostalgia

20:30

goggles, but Christopher Reed Performance

20:33

is just good. But also Lois

20:35

Lane, trying to remember her name, was just

20:38

so good. Back when we

20:40

ran Time Oysters Guide, the two

20:42

guys that we had doing movie reviews for us

20:45

hated Margot Kidder. Hated

20:47

her in this movie, thought she dragged the

20:49

entire thing down with this kind of high

20:51

strung performance. I think

20:53

she's great. The movie does not work without

20:55

her. And it presents yet a third really

20:58

classic and wonderful Superman theme played

21:00

very well, which is the cynicism

21:02

of the city versus the optimism of

21:05

the guy raised on the farm. This

21:07

idea of they highlight that

21:10

one, they work with it, and him

21:12

being sincere about his morals

21:14

and values, being uplifting

21:17

to everybody, including some of the villains, is

21:19

a great theme, at least one of the villains.

21:22

So it definitely has some structural

21:25

things that I would love to change. I would love for

21:27

Lex Luthor to be a little more,

21:30

like

21:31

you just have to change a few things. He relies

21:33

too much on the Bumbling Fool to do

21:35

things for him. Yeah. It's okay

21:37

to have the Bumbling Fool sidekick, but you don't put that person

21:39

in charge of reprogram the nuclear weapons

21:42

so that they have a little

21:44

scene where he sends the buffoon to

21:46

go do that and the buffoon messes it up and you're like,

21:48

what? Were you thinking he

21:51

can't bring you dinner without getting the order

21:53

wrong? He's got to program the missiles

21:55

wrong. So yeah. Yeah. They

21:58

try to present him as an evil master. mind

22:01

who just constantly makes the dumbest

22:03

possible choice. But cool. All

22:06

right, Captain America 79. They

22:09

don't have Buck Rogers linked, but

22:11

isn't that like the Buck Rogers that

22:13

everyone's seen? Or am I thinking of something

22:15

different? I'm thinking of a TV show. Yeah,

22:18

the TV shows what everybody's seen. Captain

22:20

America, have you ever seen the Captain America TV? No,

22:22

I have not. It's a very special, special

22:25

movie. It's not really

22:27

that noteworthy is the thing. It's not like the Roger

22:29

Corman Fantastic Four. My

22:32

new favorite superhero franchise

22:34

continues with three supermen against

22:37

the godfather. In

22:39

Italy. In 1979. You know that

22:41

one's got to be incredible. All right, let's go up to 1980.

22:44

See what we got. Hey,

22:46

Adam, see if I can find like

22:48

a DVD collection of all of the Italian

22:50

three supermen movies. Someone's got them.

22:53

I mean, here we

22:55

are. The third one. Actual Flash

22:57

Gordon. Yeah, Actual Flash

22:59

Gordon. What do you think of Flash? Ah,

23:03

I love that movie.

23:05

I do too. I love seeing like

23:08

Brian Blessed in fake wings and

23:10

hot pants. I love how

23:12

the guys like I'm going to destroy earth and

23:15

then you see him look at a big

23:18

keyboard where every key is labeled

23:20

with some different disaster

23:22

and he pushes the one that says hot hail.

23:26

Just like seven jokes layered on top of each

23:28

other and it's amazing. It is a really fun

23:30

movie. It's not as obvious

23:33

that it is all a joke as

23:36

the Batman TV show. In fact, there's large

23:38

stretches of it without jokes. I

23:41

haven't read on the making of that.

23:43

I wonder if they had disagreements in

23:45

the writers room and among the directors because

23:48

you get some scenes where they're trying to be a serious

23:51

action movie and a serious drama and

23:53

then you get things like that which are just straight

23:56

out of the Batman television show playbook.

23:59

Yeah, so. And so

24:01

weird. I do genuinely love that

24:03

movie though. I like that they went all

24:06

out with it. Yeah. One thing that we

24:09

see in a lot of more modern superhero

24:11

adaptations is, okay,

24:14

we're gonna give you superheroes, but we're gonna

24:16

try to make them realistic. We're gonna

24:18

try to make them look plausible.

24:21

And they did not even attempt

24:23

that with Flash Gordon. They're just like, we're gonna

24:25

have floating trees just

24:28

because. Same reason I liked

24:30

the One Piece adaptation. No. Well, there

24:32

you go. They didn't say, well, we have to change

24:34

this for the- You have

24:37

to make this more mainstream. No, you don't. Appeal

24:39

to your fan base. Donner Cut, Superman 2.

24:42

Have you seen both cuts? I have seen both

24:44

cuts, but I don't remember the differences between

24:46

them. Yeah, Donner Cut is less camp.

24:48

Okay. So a little more self-serious. That's

24:50

good, because that's what two needs. Yeah. And

24:53

that explains why I was sitting here thinking to myself,

24:55

I remember both liking and not liking Superman 2.

24:58

That's why. Superman 2 still has

25:01

some things like ripping the seal off the chest

25:03

and throwing him. But the story

25:05

here, I happen to be kind of a

25:08

fan of how

25:10

this all played out. Okay. So

25:12

Donner

25:13

tried to film them back to back, one and

25:16

two, which is why you may not remember, one

25:18

starts with the banishment of Zod and the

25:20

Superman 2 villains. The

25:23

woman of which I've been on TV with.

25:25

Ooh. Yes. Briefly.

25:27

Yes. Trying to remember her name, Ursa. Ursa

25:30

sounds right. The Superman 2 villain,

25:32

she was at a local convention,

25:34

sci-fi convention, and Fox

25:37

News

25:38

brought us in with the 501st

25:40

and put me on morning TV

25:42

with the Superman 2 villain and the

25:45

Stormtroopers. I'm like, I guess

25:47

this is what I deserve. That's awesome.

25:49

She was charming and delightful. Oh, I

25:51

bet. She was like, yeah, I did a few movies.

25:53

It's not really my thing, but

25:56

I find it fun that people want to meet me. So I go

25:58

to these conventions now and then. He had like a normal

26:00

life with a normal job and things like that and

26:03

he's retired now. Yeah, so.

26:05

You think that's on a resume? Superman two

26:08

villain? Which applies for a new job at

26:10

like another accounting firm or whatever. Superman

26:13

two villain. So anything firm one, accounting

26:15

firm two, Superman two, accounting

26:18

firm three. Tried to film them both back

26:21

to back. Found out that he

26:23

got about half of

26:25

Superman two filmed or chunks of it before he

26:27

realized I just need to finish Superman

26:29

one. Finish Superman one, comes

26:32

out, goes back to two, created differences

26:34

with the rights holders and the producers.

26:37

He gets fired, someone else gets brought in and

26:40

in the same thing that happened with Tim Burton, they're

26:42

like camp it up. Superheroes have to be

26:44

campy. Make it funnier. And

26:46

so filmed a whole bunch of new pickups and

26:49

things like that. Rearrange some of the scenes

26:51

and made it campier and

26:54

tried to release this amalgam of two different

26:57

director's stories. And Superman

26:59

two, it's the what could have been because

27:01

Superman one is legitimately great. Superman two has

27:04

legitimately great parts. I mean, Superman

27:06

having to decide between his powers

27:08

and

27:09

you know, lowest and a

27:11

real life is like the quintessential

27:14

superhero story to do right after origin story.

27:17

And it works real well here. Same as it works in

27:19

Spiderman two, but

27:21

it's a muddled mess. So,

27:24

but it's what got us Superman

27:26

three and four, which neither one of

27:28

them work. And it's that same thing that happened

27:30

with Batman. Superman three scared

27:34

me to death. Richard Pryor or is

27:36

it the two supermans? Is that the thing? No,

27:38

it was the scene where the AI

27:41

captures one of the scientists and

27:43

turns her into a cyborg. Got it. I

27:45

had nightmares about that for months. Three

27:48

is the two supermans, right? Where he ejects

27:51

himself and they fight. I

27:55

thought that was four, but I might. Maybe it is, maybe

27:57

it's four. All right. Okay, so what

27:59

do we got? Oh, Condor. Condor man. Condor man. Oh

28:01

man. Heavy metal. We're gonna need we're gonna

28:03

need multiple episodes to get through all this What's

28:06

your Condor man hat take? I have actually

28:08

never seen Condor man Someone

28:11

just gasped stunned

28:13

silence I Have never

28:15

seen Condor man Wow But

28:17

I have seen operation Condor and

28:19

I used to get them confused all the time I

28:22

can't even on this show. Yeah, I've

28:24

gotten them confused one is Jackie Chan

28:26

and One is the

28:28

Phantom of the Opera Okay, cuz

28:30

it's starring the actor. Oh is that

28:32

his Condor man does yeah, okay Oh

28:35

Wow, Condor man's like it's totally

28:37

your type of movie No, it's really

28:40

actually kind of boring what I hear

28:42

I've never seen it I don't know why

28:44

real weird and real dumb

28:46

but in a really heartfelt

28:48

way In trying to extrapolate

28:51

what you're saying about down right there. It's yo-yo

28:53

girl cop esque Well,

28:56

then I need to see it but maybe

28:58

not on that well, you gotta remember it came

29:00

out in 81 Yeah, four years old.

29:02

Mm-hmm. And then my parents never

29:04

showed it to me. So I've never seen it heavy

29:06

metal then What's your opinion on heavy metal? I've never

29:09

seen that one either I just recognized the

29:11

name of it because I see it on like Amazon

29:13

Prime all the time heavy metal played like Non-stop

29:16

on cable when I was younger like I've

29:19

never had cable 50 times because of that I've

29:21

never seen and I'd edited version because

29:23

of that but I have seen the other one There's some

29:26

really great sequences in heavy

29:28

metal and others that I just don't get But

29:30

for those listening the World War two fighter

29:33

pilot sequence and heavy metal is just

29:35

burned into my brain and It's

29:38

real creepy Cool. Yeah.

29:40

Anyway, all right. I've seen way more of

29:42

these than you I didn't you have that so

29:45

we skipped down to 83 There's Superman 3

29:47

Superman 3 so I would have been 6 maybe 7

29:50

when I saw it Which is just at the

29:52

right age to be absolutely terrified of

29:54

something, right? Yeah, you show a four-year-old

29:56

a horror movie and they're just gonna be like, oh, okay.

29:59

Yeah Because the fear

30:02

triggers aren't necessarily in place yet. Alright,

30:04

we're gonna finish through 84 I

30:06

think, and then we're gonna... We're gonna

30:08

have to do another episode. Yeah, because 84

30:11

is Buckaroo Banzai, which again, I have not

30:13

seen. I actually haven't either. Waaah!

30:16

Yeah! We... half our audience just stopped listening to

30:18

the show. Yeah, I know. Like,

30:21

that's the thing. But I have seen Supergirl

30:23

and The Toxic Avenger. I loved Supergirl.

30:26

It is a terrible movie, and I loved every second. Why

30:29

do you love it? It's kind of vague in my memory.

30:32

First of all, I was apparently

30:35

old enough to think the girl was hot. Okay. Even

30:38

though this is still, again, I was like eight years

30:40

old. Also, Susan

30:42

Sarandon is the... is

30:45

it... no, or Faye Dunaway. Yeah. It's

30:47

one of the two. Look up who it is for us, Adam. Is it

30:49

Faye Dunaway? Faye Dunaway is

30:51

like one of my favorite actresses of all time. I love everything she's

30:53

in. And watching

30:55

whoever that was just

30:58

chew the scenery to bits as

31:00

evil wizard Lex

31:03

Luthor, gender swapped, was

31:06

absolutely wonderful. She was

31:08

like a witch trying to get immortality or something

31:10

like that, right? Because whatever

31:12

thing it was that gave Supergirl her powers

31:15

would give her eternal life and eternal

31:17

beauty. I remember. And so she

31:19

was trying to get it. It was

31:21

a very, like, misogynist movie. I vaguely

31:23

remember being like, ooh, superhero,

31:26

Supergirl fighting villains. And then I

31:28

feel like it was like college dorms

31:31

and like... Yeah. They really

31:33

kind of infantilized Supergirl

31:35

and gave the villain this

31:37

really kind of shallow secret

31:40

plan. But I still

31:42

enjoyed it quite a bit. Wonder if it's good enough

31:44

for Bad Movie Night. I wonder if it's bad enough,

31:47

but good enough. Bad and good enough at the same time.

31:50

Yeah. Toxic Avenger,

31:52

we'll stop there. Yeah, I still haven't seen

31:54

Toxic Avenger or Sheena, Queen of the

31:56

Jungle. I have seen Toxic Avenger.

31:58

Yeah. USA. up all night

32:00

would play that and I tended to

32:02

be up late and so it's like, oh, toxic

32:05

avenger. I

32:07

am not like

32:08

fond of toxic avenger, the whole trauma

32:11

thing. Like that's not really a Brandon

32:13

thing. The intentional gross out,

32:15

the intentional whatever.

32:17

Just you know, I watched it because everyone

32:20

was talking about, but this would have been the 90s by the time I

32:22

was watching it. So it was 10 years later, like

32:24

I got to see toxic avenger to see what everyone's talking

32:26

about. That's really my thing, but

32:29

you know, trauma did eventually give

32:31

us Guardians of the Galaxy essentially. It's where

32:33

James Gunn cut his teeth on early trauma

32:36

exploitation slash films.

32:38

And so I don't know if you call trauma exploitation,

32:40

but whatever, whatever there, the serious

32:43

B movie gross out sort of stuff. So

32:46

there we go. Grind house ish sort

32:48

of things. But anyway, that's where we're

32:50

going to end. We got through, we got

32:52

through 50 years

32:54

almost. Yep. Because what we're going to do is

32:56

we're going to end at the Marvel movies. So

32:58

we might have another two episodes

33:01

of this. Many apologies to

33:03

those who are bored by it, but I'm

33:05

really interested in some of the things coming up because we'll

33:07

just give you a preview. Howard the Duck is

33:10

on its way here. And

33:13

have you seen Howard the Duck? I have seen Howard the

33:15

Duck. Ah, great. You grown.

33:18

I've never been the same since. All right. So

33:20

next time on Intentionally Blank,

33:22

Howard the Duck.

33:24

Howard that Ben.