This is the problem: My kids never ever listen to me!

Then I wonder, Do I listen to myself? Or do I crowd out my inner voice with noise?

This is the problem: My kids spend far too much time on screens!

Then I wonder, How much time do I spend on screens? Do I know how to switch off? To disconnect from technology and connect with myself and others?

This is the problem: My kids talk back to me. They are so disrespectful!

Then I wonder, Do I respect myself? Do I really trust and love myself for who I am and who I want to be? Is there self-respect?

This is the problem: My kids are so disorganised!

Then I wonder, Do I organise my life more than I need to? Can I let some things go unplanned?

This is the problem: My kids have these terrible emotional outbursts. They just lose it!

Then I wonder, Am I the master of my own emotions? Can I feel, be with and welcome my emotions? Or do I try to repress or ignore them until they overpower me?

This is the problem: My kids are so defiant! They won’t do what I say!

Then I wonder, Do I like getting my way too? Do I like to be right? Do I fight back?

This is the problem: My kids are so messy! They are always leaving their stuff around the place.

Then I wonder, Am I messy too and don’t Iike being messy? Or am I too ‘everything must be in its place’ and would like to be a bit more relaxed?

This is the problem: Maybe the problem is not my children’s behaviour after all. Maybe it’s what their behaviour is triggering within me.

Today instead of focusing on the problem, I reflect on my triggers with curiosity and interest and kindness.

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