0:00

Give a little time for the child within

0:02

you. Don't be afraid to be young and

0:05

free. Undo the locks and throw

0:07

away the keys and take off your shoes and

0:09

socks and run you. It's Jordan

0:11

Jesse Minigo. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's

0:14

radio sweetheart. Jordan Morris, boy, detective.

0:16

And with us today is a very

0:18

special guest from Greatest Track and the

0:20

Greatest Generation, Benjamin Harrison. Hi Ben, how

0:22

are you? I'm great.

0:25

Thanks for having me, guys. Now this

0:27

is exciting, Jordan, for me because Ben

0:29

lives right nearby. Ben

0:32

and I live in roughly the same neighborhood

0:34

in Los Angeles. And

0:36

Ben reports his show. Do you guys go to

0:38

the same post office? To run into

0:40

Ben in the post office, that's the

0:42

dream. That'd be fun. We're reaching for

0:44

the PO box and our keys bump

0:46

into each other. Ben's

0:49

odd sort of trapezoidal office is

0:52

in a weird, super

0:54

odd outbuilding behind his house

0:57

that includes, among other things,

1:01

some kind of disused hippie theater.

1:04

Yep. But

1:08

I'll go out there. That's where I'll

1:10

hang out with Ben Harrison when I'm visiting him

1:12

at his home. And

1:15

there is a big, big change. There's

1:17

been a big home improvement project there

1:20

in Ben Harrison's office. And

1:23

that is, he's added colorful LED

1:25

backlighting. Everything. We're

1:27

looking through the camera. Everything

1:29

has colorful LED backlighting. Everything.

1:34

And I could even change it up up here, but

1:36

I also have a big window and I think

1:39

that would wash out the overheads if I

1:41

tried to really make it super disco in

1:44

here. Ben, are the neighborhood influencers

1:46

always creeping into your house to get

1:48

their latest selfie? Yeah,

1:50

pretty much this was all inspired

1:52

by TikTok and my desire to

1:55

have more listeners to.

2:00

my shows and maybe

2:02

thinking vaguely maybe I should be

2:04

doing some TikToks to influence

2:08

people to listen to my podcast.

2:10

You gotta do TikToks. It's an

2:13

interesting claim that you claim that

2:15

this was influenced by wanting to

2:17

make TikToks get listeners to listen

2:19

to your podcast when obviously- To

2:21

real, it's an influencer circle. Like

2:23

it's an ouroboros of influence. It

2:26

was obviously influenced

2:28

by the undercarriage of a Honda

2:30

Civic CTI. No

2:33

doubt about where this influence came from. Or

2:35

the subreddit,

2:37

maillivingspaces. Are you

2:39

guys familiar with this subreddit? No. I know

2:41

living spaces, it's where I go to get

2:44

all my end tables, but I've never heard

2:46

of that. Do they mail living spaces? Do

2:49

these feature lots of Nike shoe

2:51

boxes that have been used for

2:53

unspeakable purposes? These

2:56

are just photos of cum jars, Jesse, right? It

3:01

is one of the most fascinating

3:03

and incredible corners of

3:06

the internet because it is

3:08

both like a celebration, speaking

3:11

as a semi-retired menswear

3:13

blogger, it is a

3:15

celebration of aesthetic for

3:17

men, aesthetics

3:19

for men, for

3:22

which I'm always grateful. I always think

3:24

it's nice when men try

3:27

and make something pretty. You know what I mean? It

3:31

is also a celebration of just a

3:33

few categories of home. One

3:37

is depression cave. People

3:41

will post like, I'm

3:43

26, just moved back in with

3:45

my parents, live in

3:47

a hole deep underground, my bed and

3:49

the mattress on the floor. Yeah. They're

3:53

like, I have four different Xboxes. Right.

3:56

What can I do? I'm running

3:58

an extension cord to my neighbor. outlit

4:00

in their yard because my house doesn't have

4:02

power. So that's one category

4:05

where it's just someone has made

4:07

a hamster nest of cum tissues.

4:10

The second category

4:13

is what

4:15

I would call like contract

4:19

killer, I guess. You

4:22

know, it's

4:24

on the range between

4:26

contract killer and

4:28

Airbnb. So just like

4:31

functional, sparse, you

4:33

know, baby. A place where every time they

4:35

leave the house they're cleaning up any little

4:38

bits of hair that have fallen off so

4:41

that nobody can get their DNA. And

4:43

there's a near absence of like evidence

4:45

that a human being has ever been

4:47

there. Like there's no photographs or art,

4:50

it's just like black and white

4:52

furniture. That's the one

4:54

that has the LED backlighting, by the

4:56

way. Are these things

4:59

people are like posting

5:01

themselves for kudos or

5:03

are they like trying to get people to

5:05

roast them or are these like, I

5:08

was in this guy's house and you won't fucking believe

5:10

what it looked like? Like why? Who is posting and

5:12

why? These are not- God,

5:14

I hope that I'm not the third category.

5:16

These are not other people's houses. The

5:19

depression nests are

5:23

often posted with self-awareness.

5:25

Like people know that they need

5:28

some help. They're trying to get

5:30

their act together. And I

5:32

actually, those I think are the ones that

5:34

I often like the best.

5:37

Like, because I like the attitude of

5:39

the people who are like, can

5:42

you please teach me how to

5:46

have a bed frame? Yeah, match my furniture. You

5:48

know what I mean? The

5:52

one I probably like the

5:54

least is that terrifying contract

5:56

killer Apartment with LED

5:58

backlighting. They have these. Ah

6:01

the the television's are

6:03

monumental is and assesses

6:05

just possess taking. A

6:08

you the biggest a big tv in here

6:10

but I think it's appropriate for the space

6:12

and I watch tv for by job. So

6:15

yeah the other thing that people get mad

6:17

about us in my office is embarrassing Jesse

6:19

you don't need to make and and a

6:21

higher episode out about how of berries and

6:23

my ah forgiveness Great then the third category

6:25

of person. On. Ben.

6:27

We we called you here to roast you

6:29

by the way, as if they didn't hear.

6:32

That look at look at his little

6:34

look a little succulent. Ah, it's Saturday

6:37

when it was. Glad that because I

6:39

brings me to the third category of

6:41

people on our/mail living spaces banned by

6:43

the way, your back or drop is

6:46

genuinely impressed. Me really looks fantastic. Ah,

6:48

sitting here in front of. To.

6:51

Ukulele in an. Action. Figure

6:53

of Andre the Giant, so I'm not really in

6:55

a position in attack. But.

6:59

I. Have a third

7:01

category is just full scale

7:04

jungle, just like houseplants covering

7:06

every single surface. I don't

7:08

know, like some at some

7:11

point five years ago. It

7:14

became Nineteen Seventy Four. And.

7:17

All these dudes houses just filled with

7:19

could zoo you know what I mean.

7:22

Like as it did that the native

7:24

pig that used to eat the could

7:26

zoo in these people's houses died off

7:28

and then vines took over. Everything does

7:30

a three categories but I do like

7:33

your alley the of backlighting especially on

7:35

that impressive television with the greatest generation

7:37

ago and. I

7:39

ah yeah I mean is it was fun to

7:41

put on. It was kind of just as. If

7:44

be ill Ill be of little bit

7:46

nicer looking back there. Is

7:48

also just have like tall white walls

7:50

so there's just nothing. There's nothing above

7:52

the T V and like hanging a

7:54

picture above a Tv feels like a

7:56

weird choice. Tell. Have been. i've

7:59

been fiddling with it. I'm

8:01

not sure if this is the final form of

8:04

the office. The main thing people get upset about

8:06

on that subreddit

8:08

is people whose televisions are hung too

8:10

high. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That

8:13

just fills people with rage. It's like, as

8:15

though they can't imagine the idea that someone

8:18

might like a different place for

8:20

the television than they do. Ben,

8:25

we've been having a lot of

8:27

fun on our mini-sodes answering AMA

8:29

questions from listeners.

8:32

Okay. It struck me, when

8:35

I heard you were coming on today, I want you

8:37

to weigh in on some of these things we've

8:39

already weighed in on. Would you mind fielding a

8:41

couple of AMAs? Happy

8:43

to do it. Before we go, my

8:45

dog is barking in the backyard. Is that bothering you

8:47

guys? Can you hear it? I like it. We can

8:49

hear it, but I'm loving it. Yeah. Okay.

8:54

That's Darwin for the folks listening at

8:56

home. Love him. Yes,

9:00

Ben, I will spare you

9:02

the ones that are hyper-tailored

9:04

to Jesse and give you

9:06

some just nice down-the-middle ones.

9:10

What's a fun way to have a

9:12

midlife crisis? Oh,

9:15

boy. I don't

9:18

think I'm speaking out of school to say

9:20

a mutual

9:22

friend of Jesse and mine, Adam Ragusea,

9:24

has been having a midlife crisis. I'd

9:26

say he's been quite public about the

9:28

fact that he's having a midlife crisis.

9:32

Okay. The way he

9:34

seems to be having it is

9:36

by building a really cool greenhouse

9:38

and elaborate fish tank situation in

9:41

the greenhouse. Ben,

9:43

fish tanks are central to the male

9:46

living space lifestyle. Jesse,

9:50

these fish tank dudes are out of

9:52

control. Yeah. I love

9:54

a fish tank. I

9:56

have a lifelong love of aquariums. I grew up

9:58

going to the Monterey Bay Aquarium with

10:00

my mom and dad. Just

10:07

to hold a little bit of that light

10:09

as my own would be amazing. And

10:12

when Ragusia posts

10:14

some social media or YouTube

10:17

video about what he's got going on in

10:19

his fish tanks, I'm like, I kind of want to lose it too.

10:22

I kind of want to go down a spiral

10:24

and get really into fish tanks. Are

10:26

his fish tanks like tropical decorative fish?

10:29

When you said they were in the

10:31

greenhouse, I immediately pictured something that my

10:34

brother-in-law is constantly claiming he's

10:36

going to do, which is

10:38

start a tilapia farm in

10:40

his backyard. Yeah. Well,

10:43

I think there is some aquaculture

10:45

element of it where it's like

10:47

doing something with the plants maybe,

10:51

like the poops that the fish are

10:53

making are then going on to make the

10:55

plants happier. I

10:58

would like just a tank of water. Skip

11:00

the fish, skip the decorations, just a tank

11:02

of water where I check the pH levels

11:04

every day. Yeah. I

11:07

mean, just something to take care of is nice.

11:09

Yeah. Dip a little strip

11:11

in there and go, hmm, interesting. I

11:14

just like to just shove my face into something

11:16

once a day. Right. Yeah.

11:20

Yeah. No. Jesse,

11:22

if you had a fish tank, you'd be shoving

11:24

your face in there? Yeah, sure. Okay.

11:27

What if you got those little fish

11:29

that you see in tourist towns that

11:31

nibbled the dead skin off your toothees?

11:33

Oh, yeah. And you just did that

11:35

for your face to exfoliate? That

11:37

would be great. I

11:40

was thinking to myself, when this

11:42

question came up, I couldn't think

11:44

of anything initially of what my

11:46

midlife crisis is. I

11:48

think of anything, I feel

11:51

like I've had other crises in my

11:53

life, but midlife is going pretty smooth.

11:55

Like, I have had many crisis points,

11:58

but midlife is. This is going

12:00

all right, but I think my beard is

12:02

my midlife crisis. I think my, you know, I grew

12:05

this beard for the first time, you know, at 40. And

12:09

you know, and I think I'm really loving it. I'm

12:11

still having a lot of fun. I'm kind of still

12:13

learning about the grooming and the care of the beard.

12:16

And if I could dunk my head in a

12:18

little fish tank and just get

12:20

those little fishies to nibble off just enough

12:22

beard to where I look nice and tidy,

12:25

are there beard fish? There's got to be

12:27

beard fish. There's got to be beard fish. Fish.

12:29

Yeah. We should

12:31

maybe start a breeding program,

12:33

like get a kind

12:36

of tourist town, Tootsie

12:38

fish to learn how to shape

12:40

a beard. Yeah. Get those nasty

12:43

Tootsie fish to

12:47

chomp those, to chomp the beards. Can

12:49

I ask you guys? Those fish are nasty. Those

12:52

fish are nasty foot freaks, aren't they? Yeah,

12:54

fish are sick. That's

12:57

why they call them tarantino fish. Love

13:01

them nasty feet. Yeah, those

13:03

fish love it when they speak on Maine. Yeah.

13:07

And by on Maine, they mean in tech. I

13:12

think the question that I have

13:14

that your question suggests, Ben, is

13:16

why aren't we? And when I

13:19

say we, both we collectively

13:21

and we individually, each of none

13:23

of us, why

13:25

are none of us running a

13:27

breeding program of any kind, we

13:30

could be breeding super soldiers. We could be

13:32

breeding dog men. Yeah.

13:35

Or like a mosquito that beats up other

13:37

mosquitoes so that they don't bite you. Yeah,

13:39

the only thing. You know? Online

13:43

cyberbully mosquito. A mosquito

13:45

that goes on social media. Right. Just

13:48

a drive. A drive that makes you feel really

13:51

bad about things you're insecure about. It's not a

13:53

pillar that's really good at shitposting. What

14:00

about just a moth that does good

14:02

Simpsons memes? Everybody

14:05

can enjoy that. Okay,

14:08

you have to remember the Mr. Plow episode, but

14:10

if you do, this is very funny. Hey,

14:14

Max Fundrive excitement announcement is

14:16

what I have now. Do

14:19

you want to hear it? Oh, it

14:21

is the Max Fundrive, by the way.

14:23

For people who are listening, please go

14:25

to maximumfund.org/join, because this is the very

14:27

end of the line. We have like

14:29

48 hours left in the Max Fundrive,

14:32

and we hope that you will take

14:34

this opportunity now that you're listening to

14:36

or watching a 20-minute episode

14:38

of this podcast. That's how addicted to it

14:40

you are. You're

14:42

a nasty Jordan Jesse Go-free. And

14:46

we're asking you to help

14:49

us find on you by

14:51

giving us five bucks a

14:53

month, maximumfund.org/join. Make

14:55

your aspirational midlife crisis

14:57

be about supporting shows

15:00

that you really like. There you go. Yeah,

15:03

everybody can enjoy that. Hey, because

15:05

in the Max Fundrive, Max Fund has

15:09

passed over 10,000 new

15:12

upgrading boosting members. Way

15:14

to go, everybody. That's cool. John

15:17

Hodgman and I are going to do our special Ideria

15:22

episode of shooting the

15:25

breeze, B-R-I-E-S, our

15:27

cheese show. This is going to be March

15:30

29th. That's Friday at 10 a.m. PST.

15:32

So we're going to do this mini-sode,

15:34

and then I'm going to roll right

15:36

into Ideria

15:38

with Hodgman. We

15:40

are going to taste the hottest

15:43

challenge cheeses that we

15:45

obtained on the internet. So ghost

15:47

pepper, scorpion pepper, gun

15:50

pepper, stick,

15:54

dick, pepper, cheeses. We're going to try

15:56

them all on stream. Right

16:01

the strongest of all the cheeses. I like

16:03

Jordan I feel like the nice

16:06

thing about this is usually when you do a

16:08

spicy foods Challenge you

16:10

have to worry about two spiciness

16:13

Incidents two separate spiciness

16:16

incidents as it passes

16:18

through your mouth and a second, right? And

16:21

I think in this case if

16:24

you're lucky the

16:26

cheese Will prevent

16:29

the second one from occurring if you eat

16:31

enough cheese It will

16:33

never pass through your body. The spice

16:35

will just accumulate into my colon until

16:37

I roast from the inside Man

16:44

that's the dream Hey,

16:46

Ben. Thanks for joining us. What

16:48

what can folks look forward to

16:51

in the greatest gen greatest track bonus content

16:53

feed If they go to maximum fun that

16:55

works, let's join Well,

16:57

I have I

16:59

also have an exciting Hodgman related

17:01

announcement about that but right now

17:03

if you if you

17:05

become a member our greatest track bonus

17:08

episode is a review

17:10

of the pilot of a series

17:14

that I think was only one season long

17:16

on Fox in the 90s called space above

17:18

and beyond and the pilot is Absolutely

17:21

amazing because it's about it's

17:23

basically like if Starship

17:26

Troopers was less

17:29

Sat satire oriented and more just a

17:32

straight down the middle like this is

17:34

two writers from the X-Files doing Starship

17:37

Troopers, but also most

17:40

of the episode is boot camp

17:42

stuff featuring Arleigh Ermey like yelling

17:44

space related boot camp drill

17:46

instructor shit at the at the characters

17:50

And we had a lot of fun talking about it. It's one

17:53

of my favorite episodes. We've done in a while and

17:55

then on the greatest gen side we have

17:57

a video

18:01

a like 90 minute very

18:03

highly produced video of our

18:06

revisit of the pilot of Star

18:08

Trek the next generation which we

18:11

we did last year as a as a fun

18:13

thing in Brooklyn and it

18:16

was it was a paid

18:18

livestream, but now you can watch it for free and It's

18:22

it's a great episode as well

18:24

and you know like super

18:27

high spec It's like produced like a like a

18:29

comedy special. So it's it's really fun to watch

18:32

You know make a weekend plan and sit

18:34

down and enjoy I want to

18:36

mention a couple of things that we have going on John

18:40

Hodgman and I will be streaming today at

18:43

1 o'clock across all the judge John Hodgman

18:45

socials and on the judge John Hodgman YouTube

18:48

page John has just announced that it's judge

18:50

Jesse Thorn We

18:52

will be streaming so at 1 o'clock Pacific

18:55

clock Eastern time you can join us for

18:57

that I have

18:59

just because we passed 10,000 new and

19:01

upgrading members there for bulls

19:03

eye I created a custom playlist

19:06

just for one bullseye

19:08

listener, although we have made it public

19:10

now he want he is a

19:14

Bakery delivery driver in San Francisco

19:16

So he said I get up, you

19:19

know at three or four o'clock in the

19:21

morning to deliver bread across the city of

19:23

San Francisco So I made a classic soul

19:26

Playlist inspired by my own days getting up

19:28

at three o'clock in the morning when I work for the

19:30

Department of Elections to

19:32

drive around San Francisco for like For

19:37

moving between the moving

19:39

gently between the dark part of

19:42

the morning and into the light

19:44

a lot of warm

19:47

warm and comforting classic soul

19:49

songs That you

19:51

can find on all the bullseye Social

19:54

media both there's a Spotify playlist and Apple

19:56

music playlist. There's a text playlist if you

19:58

want to I've created it with 45. And

20:03

we also, because we passed 10,000

20:05

members, we have made

20:08

a promise on Bullseye. This

20:10

is an idea that my producer Kevin had yesterday,

20:14

called me while I was walking the dog. I

20:17

agreed to it without having called the other

20:19

person involved. That

20:22

is, if we, I have since done so. If

20:25

we make it to 15,000 new and upgrading

20:27

members, your mom will host Bullseye. Wow!

20:31

Wow, wow. Judy, who is an

20:34

almost 80-year-old, 79,

20:38

I believe she is, a

20:40

year-old, a retired junior

20:43

college professor and antique

20:45

lighting salesperson and

20:47

drug dealer. One

20:50

of the all-time great ladies. One of the all-time great ladies.

20:53

A triple threat, Judy. Yeah, and

20:55

let's just say, not just one of the all-time

20:57

greats, but

20:59

a very colorful person. That's

21:01

true. That's

21:05

super exciting. I also

21:07

have a 15,000 supporter announce. John

21:12

Hodgeman is gonna join me and Adam for

21:14

a bonus episode where we review the

21:17

pilot of Quantum Leap. Hey!

21:20

Yeah! Got Baccala Show, if the network

21:22

hits that 15K goal. That's

21:26

tough. I think we can get there. maximumfun.org/join.

21:30

If you haven't done it already, get over there. Get

21:32

all this cool bonus content we've been talking about. And

21:35

yeah, maybe do a little social media post.

21:37

It's helpful for us because then we have

21:39

something to post. So if you wanna help

21:41

us get over that 15K line and

21:45

you're already joined, yeah, do a little

21:47

social media post, give us a tag, and

21:49

we'll boost that message for everybody. Guys, thank

21:51

you so much. I wanna thank this Stefano00038

21:56

who bought a gift membership on behalf

21:58

of the team. of

22:01

somebody else. Hot damn. That's really

22:03

nice. That's very cool. Not only that, but

22:06

they said they are buying a

22:08

gift membership for every Jordan

22:10

and Jesse mini

22:13

go that they watch. So they're up

22:15

to three now. Love it. Love

22:17

it. Absolutely massive. That's absolutely

22:20

incredible. Thanks to everybody

22:22

who's been watching. I

22:25

see a lot of Jordan, Jesse go

22:27

regulars, Amy and Liz, Jeff,

22:29

lots of folks, Michael,

22:32

lots of folks who I

22:34

recognize from all over the internet.

22:36

Big Jordan, Jesse go heads in the chat.

22:38

Caleb. Thank you, Caleb.

22:40

And thanks to everybody who's been listening to these on

22:43

the podcast feed. A reminder, these will

22:47

live on beyond the max

22:49

run drive, but only as

22:51

member exclusive bonus content. So

22:53

if you want to tap

22:55

into that sweet feed of

22:57

BOCO, go to maximumfund.org/join. Ben's

23:00

trying to find a vein. Trying

23:03

to raise a vein because I want to put that BOCO

23:05

in there. Yeah. Anyway,

23:07

we're so grateful to everybody who's a

23:09

member, everybody who's joined and boosted and

23:11

upgraded, everybody who has maintained their membership

23:13

for years and years and years. You

23:16

mean the world to us. I was

23:18

just this morning signing up to

23:21

watch baseball games on streaming

23:23

internet. I was sending my money

23:25

to the squidgillionaires at Major League

23:27

Baseball and I was thinking, you

23:30

know what? Nice to pay

23:32

for something you like. It's worth the money. It's

23:35

worth the money. maximumfund.org/join. Nice when

23:37

something you like makes the people

23:39

squidgillionaires. People deserve to be squidgillionaires.

23:41

They do. They make something good.

23:43

It's good to be that. Ben,

23:45

we know already that you're a squidgillionaire. We can

23:48

tell by the LED backlighting on all your furniture.

23:50

Well, I used to be and then I bought

23:52

these damn lights. So expensive.

23:55

Thanks for joining us on Jordan, Jesse Minigo, Ben. Thank

23:58

you so much for having me. This was a hoot. We'll talk

24:00

to everybody again tomorrow. I hope QA gets

24:02

you in love with me. Love

24:05

you. Love you.

24:09

Love you. Love you. Maximum

24:17

Fun. A worker-owned

24:19

network of artist-owned shows.

24:21

Supported directly by you.