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Hi everyone, welcome to Thanks for Being

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Here, a short weekly pod to remind

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us of the many essential and beautiful

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ways we affect one another. Every

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Sunday, I'll read a submission from

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a listener, Kelly Corrigan-Wenders, could be

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wedding vows or a bat mitzvah

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toast, a eulogy or retirement speech.

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We believe this is probably the

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loveliest way to tap into our

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better selves and remember our highest

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values. We encourage you to

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share this podcast each week with one person

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you love, maybe someone you miss

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and need to bring closer, someone

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you want to feel your appreciation

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or admiration or both. This

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is Thanks for Being Here. This

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show is sponsored by BetterHelp. A

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lot of us spend our lives wishing

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we had more time, but the question is

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time for what? Like if you had an

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extra hour in your day, how would you use it? Maybe

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the best way to squeeze a

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special thing into your schedule is

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to actually find out what's important to

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you and make that important thing a

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priority. Therapy can help you

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discover what your values really are. I

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today to get 10%

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off your first month. That's BetterHelp.

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Today's

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Thanks for Being Here is from Keith

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Romano. Hi, Kelly. My

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wife listens to your podcast and encourages everyone

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she knows to do the same. I

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have been moved by your Thanks for Being Here

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episodes and wanted to send you the eulogy I

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just delivered from my father

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this weekend. His is a life well

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lived and I'd love to share his

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story. Thank you, Keith. This

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is the eulogy of Patrick Romano written

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by his son Keith delivered

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on April 1st, 2023. We

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are all so lucky to have known my

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dad. And as his son, I feel like

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I won the lottery. You know,

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one thing about my dad is that he was

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consistent. The man we knew at

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home was the same man you knew in

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the neighborhood or in graduate school at WPI

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or at Westfield or on the golf course

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or on the ball field. And that is

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so cool because it makes me feel so much

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more connected to all of you here today. We

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all love this man for

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the same reasons. I

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hope that I can capture some of

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those reasons in his eulogy today and

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that they might resonate with you as

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you mourn and remember him. Let's face

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it. My dad was hilarious. If

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someone cut the cheese, if

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someone cut the cheese right now,

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he'd be the first to yell

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salute. My dad

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valued physical activity, sports and competition.

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He was a gritty athlete with

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a competitive spirit who played division

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one college basketball at AIC. He

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could shoot the three ball with a marksman's aim.

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But above all, he emphasized

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teamwork over talent. He was a stickler

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for passing the ball. As my

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coach, I can still hear him yell from

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the sidelines, move the ball, Keith. The

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no look pass was his all time favorite

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feet on the court. This is

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when the ball is passed to a teammate without

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even making eye contact. To him, it was an

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act of beauty, the intersection of

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teamwork, skill and grace. When

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we watched the NCAA tournament basketball

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on TV on the rare occasion of a

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no look pass, he would sit up from

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his slouch and say, nice. My

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dad was fiercely uncompromising in his

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beliefs and values. He

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was a tough grader only because he believed

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in fairness. Grading exams was

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the worst time of the year for

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him. He lamented over deciding final grades.

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He would ask me, should I pass the student with a

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69% average? I

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would say, yeah, dad, let them pass with a

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C- and he would lament, but that would be

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unfair to those who earned a C-. So

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he would funk him. Dad

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was also strongly opinionated. You

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don't put broccoli on pizza. If

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he believed in something, he would not back down

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from an argument. But remarkably, dad

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never let his beliefs interfere

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with his relationships. I

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don't entirely know how he pulled that

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off. My best guess is that despite

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strong opinions, he never passed final judgment.

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He never deemed someone as unworthy.

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He continued to see the good qualities

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in people, even when he disagreed. It

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never led to contempt. In

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his sickness, our entire family rallied around

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him and supported him through

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therapy. Everyone played a unique role.

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Some focused on the medicine, some on

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nutrition, on rehab, and walking, on life's

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comfort, or just keeping

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things light. Even the

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kids pitched in by doing the things grandpa

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loved. Talking baseball, listening

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to his amazing childhood stories,

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reading history books, or learning the new

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way to do math. But

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in illness for the first time, I saw

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my dad compromise on some of his core

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values. His commitment to

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staying active and independent was unattainable in

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the face of terminal cancer, and he

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knew it. He would often ask,

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should I just go in the towel? To

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him, a life without physical activity was

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not worth little. Yet

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without any chance of cure, he decided to

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suffer through treatment anyway. He endured

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six months of intense fatigue, nausea,

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and breathlessness along his journey with

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cancer. As

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a family, we became united in our mission to

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help dad. But it's obvious to

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me now that we had it backwards. Dad

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was helping us. While drafting

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this eulogy, I realized that Dad

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had thrown his last no-look pass.

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We were supporting him in his fight,

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yes, but more importantly, he was shepherding

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us, his family, through

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the transition to life without him.

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He was preparing us for what would come

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next. Picture this. At

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three thirty in the morning, on the day of his

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death, while he laid in bed in his

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favorite room in my home, we noticed

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his breathing changed. Mark

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and I repositioned him so that my mom could

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join him, and she cuddled next

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to him one last time with her head

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on his chest and hand on his heart.

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Sarah, Mark, Asia, and I were sprawled out

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on the floor around them, while

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his three grandchildren were fast asleep

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just five steps away. The

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fireplace glowed as the sound of

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amazing grace soothed the space. Dad

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was our patriarch, our glue, and

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on his final day, he completed this

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final act, this last

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no-look pass, of

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bringing us all together as a family.

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In closing, I'd like to share

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with this congregation a few quips that my

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dad would often say. One,

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about imperfection, it ain't a

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Picasso. Two, about emotion,

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don't get too high, don't get too low.

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Three, about money, it's easy come,

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easy go. Four,

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about losing, leave your emotions

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on the field. Five,

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about chatter, stop talking through your

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hat. Six, about bragging,

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don't tell me what you're going to do.

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Do it first, then tell me about it.

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Seven, about comparisons, don't worry about other

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people, just worry about yourself. Eight,

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about conflict or heartbreak, let

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it go, Louie. My

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dad is sitting up from his slouch

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right now saying, nice, because

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I just threw my first no-look pass

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as a father. Grandpa's sayings

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weren't actually meant for that. They

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were meant only for you three,

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his precious grandkids. Soha,

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Adil and Asif, you

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are grandpa's greatest treasures.

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I promise to remind you of his words

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every day and just in the

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way he would say them. No

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more ruckus and let's promise to

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live a life that will make grandpa proud. Thanks

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Keith and thank you all for being here.

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I'll see you on Tuesday with another Kelly Corrigan

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wonders. From

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BRX.