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Only two things are guaranteed in life: Death and laughter!

Only two things are guaranteed in life: Death and laughter!

Released Thursday, 14th March 2024
Good episode? Give it some love!
Only two things are guaranteed in life: Death and laughter!

Only two things are guaranteed in life: Death and laughter!

Only two things are guaranteed in life: Death and laughter!

Only two things are guaranteed in life: Death and laughter!

Thursday, 14th March 2024
Good episode? Give it some love!
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Episode Transcript

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0:00

Hi, I'm Mark Chavez. I'm one of

0:02

the hosts of Let's Make A, a

0:04

comedy docuseries podcast about the creative process.

0:07

Each season, my co-hosts, Ryan Beale, Maddie

0:09

Kelly and I, take on an artistic

0:11

challenge and you follow our journey. And

0:14

Let's Make a Sci-Fi, we wrote a science fiction TV

0:16

pilot. In Let's Make a Rom-Com,

0:18

we wrote a romantic comedy film and on

0:20

our latest season, Let's Make a Horror, we

0:22

produced a horror short film. And when we

0:24

run into trouble, we interview Hollywood experts. People

0:27

who have worked on big things like The

0:29

Blair Witch Project, The Office, Star Wars,

0:31

Mamma Mia and more. All

0:33

three seasons of Let's Make A are available

0:35

now, wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome

0:46

to Laugh Out Loud. I'm your host, Ali

0:48

Hassan. And

0:53

today on our comedy show,

0:56

we're exploring death. What's

0:58

that now? I thought this was a comedy

1:00

show. Well, you know, it comes

1:03

for us all. And comedians, the good

1:05

ones, know how to put a very funny bow

1:07

on it. From a gala

1:09

entitled Die Laughing at the Winnipeg

1:11

Comedy Festival with a very personal

1:13

story about death, here is Dion

1:16

Arnold. Thank

1:21

you very much. Hi, everybody. My name is Dion

1:24

Arnold. Thank you so much for being here tonight.

1:27

I'm going to tell you a story, kind

1:30

of because I have to. Mostly

1:34

because my grandmother passed

1:36

away by assisted suicide. Yeah,

1:39

I can't just tell you that and then not

1:42

the story. Be

1:44

kind of hard to throw that up and then just kind of walk

1:47

away from. My

1:51

grandmother was always very impatient, so

1:54

no one was really surprised. Yeah.

1:57

Oh, yeah. No one was surprised when she was like,

1:59

hey, Dion, Take that, pick it up. Uh, like

2:03

my whole life, uh, growing up, my

2:05

grandma's catchphrase was, anyways,

2:10

in its entirety, that was her

2:13

whole catchphrase. Didn't matter what you were talking

2:15

about. Grandma was over it. You'd

2:19

be like, Grandma, I'm going through a horrible divorce.

2:21

Could really use you right now. And she would

2:23

go, anyways,

2:25

been there, done

2:27

that. Let's go bowling. Uh,

2:30

at 92 years old, my

2:33

grandmother was in a horrible car accident. She

2:36

was crossing Portage Avenue and

2:39

it very poorly wrecked car everywhere.

2:41

And my grandmother walked away from

2:44

it unscathed. Completely

2:46

fine. Yeah. Well,

2:50

you say that, but she was pissed. She

2:54

was so mad. She was confused. She was like,

2:56

am I a superhero? What's going on? We

3:00

heard the news, we called, we were like, are you okay?

3:02

And she went, what's going to kill me? As

3:06

if she had been trying. At

3:13

95 years old, she moved into an

3:15

old folks home, a retirement home, and

3:17

she starts having all these, what the

3:19

doctors called unexplained random falls. They're not

3:21

unexplained. She's 95. Your

3:25

explanation is right there. She is made

3:27

of dust. That's

3:31

what dust does. It

3:33

settles on the ground. One

3:39

day we got a call from the hospital. Let us know

3:41

she's been admitted to hospital after

3:43

one of these falls. And she's now having

3:45

a brain hemorrhage. She has internal bleeding in

3:48

her brain. And we're told we only have

3:50

maybe eight hours left with her. And so

3:52

we all fly out. About 12 of us

3:54

fly from our respective homes and we all

3:56

come to Winnipeg to be with her. Here's

4:00

a big twist. Turns out, the

4:02

fall never caused the brain hemorrhage. The

4:05

brain hemorrhage has been going on for

4:07

years and is actually what's been causing

4:09

these falls. Ah,

4:12

bigger twist? None of us can find

4:14

hotel rooms. Winnipeg,

4:18

huge tourist town. Don't

4:22

know if you knew. Thanksgiving,

4:24

huge day for Ukrainians apparently.

4:28

I should know, I'm Ukrainian. None

4:31

of us can find hotel rooms and so all 12 of

4:33

us do the only thing that we can do and

4:35

12 of us move into my grandmother's one bedroom apartment

4:37

in an old folks home. And

4:43

they hate us.

4:45

One because there is 11 of us, too many.

4:49

Two because it's a family reunion so

4:51

we are drinking. And

4:54

our grandma might die so we are

4:57

drinking. They

5:00

keep coming around being like, this is not a frat house. We're

5:03

like, my grandma said we could stay here at school. Slam.

5:09

And we don't care that they hate us because

5:11

we get to be there with our grandmother for

5:13

those eight hours. And it's very important to us

5:15

that we are there for those eight hours because

5:18

at the end of those eight hours, my

5:21

grandmother is declared stable.

5:27

She's going to be totally fine. And

5:32

she is pissed. She's

5:35

so mad. We're

5:38

like, grandma, this is great. You're going to make a full recovery.

5:41

And she goes, I don't want it. I

5:46

want the maid. We

5:49

look around, we're like the room's spotless. This

5:53

is when we find out from my grandmother who was a

5:56

registered nurse what maid is. Maid

5:58

here in Canada. an acronym that

6:00

stands for medical assistance and death. It's

6:03

something that we have in Canada I think

6:05

is very beautiful that we give terminally ill

6:07

and near-death people that dignity back and that

6:09

choice back. It is only for the terminally

6:12

ill and near-death. You don't just get to

6:14

call it in on your dad. As

6:18

much as we would all love to be homeowners. We

6:33

find this out from her and she asks if

6:35

she can take this program and we go never

6:37

want an argument with you in my life. I'm

6:40

not going to start now. And

6:43

so we start to figure it out and also this

6:45

way you know we get to be there for it.

6:47

We get to be with her. We get to say

6:49

goodbye and we get to find out whether or not

6:52

you are in fact Wolverine. Because

6:55

if this doesn't get her I'm signing her

6:57

up to the academy. They know

7:00

where it is. So

7:03

now we have a celebration to everyone who hasn't, not the

7:05

death, but we have a celebration. She

7:08

turns 96 in hospital. So everyone who hasn't

7:10

flown out flies out and we're trying to

7:12

have this birthday party. She turns

7:14

96 and we're going grandma this is amazing. You turn

7:17

96 and she goes I thought 69 maybe. Weird time

7:19

for a weird sex joke grandma. It's her

7:28

birthday we'll allow it. And

7:31

it is on her 96th birthday party that we get

7:34

word back from the May program that she

7:36

is in fact eligible. We will

7:38

be losing her grandmother in the next two weeks.

7:41

It's a very difficult, very sombering mood to

7:43

put on this birthday party for

7:45

the rest of us. She

7:48

couldn't be more excited. She

7:51

threw her hands in the air and was like best birthday

7:53

present ever. And

7:57

we went oh yeah that's what you wanted. You

8:00

can't find that at the mall. We

8:02

start taking back gifts. We're like, don't worry, she's

8:04

never going to use it. And

8:12

it was a gift to her. It was exactly what she wanted.

8:14

She was laying in bed at 96 in pain,

8:17

and she didn't want that anymore. And it was giving

8:19

her dignity back. And she got so excited. She went

8:21

from laying in a hospital bed, depressed

8:24

and upset about her position, to being so

8:26

excited. She cracked out every joke she possibly

8:28

could for the next two weeks. And this

8:30

was the first one that she would always

8:32

start with every single morning. In

8:35

Grace General Hospital, there was a sign that sat

8:37

on the wall that said, Checkout time at this

8:39

hospital is 10 a.m. Yeah,

8:42

we can all agree that's ridiculous. Yeah,

8:45

because this is a hospital, not a

8:47

hotel. How

8:50

about checkout time is whenever you fix me, bud. How about that?

8:54

And the doctor just says, Hey, you still bleeding? Cool. Well, it's 10.

9:00

Get a taxi. Hospital's full. And

9:03

every morning she would wake up, she would look at the

9:05

sign, she would look at the clock, and if the clock

9:07

said 10 a.m., she would point at the sign and point

9:09

at the clock and go, Where are

9:12

they? Every

9:14

morning. Where are they? You

9:17

just had to joke back with her. 11, 12, 1. Ah,

9:20

Grandma, you're over your time. And she'd

9:22

go, Haha, no, seriously, kill

9:24

me. But

9:29

her favorite, favorite joke was every single new

9:32

person that came in the hospital room. She

9:35

would sit up in bed, look at them and go, Is

9:37

it you? As

9:42

if you're the doctor now. One

9:45

day a janitor comes in and she sits up and

9:48

goes, Is it you? And

9:50

we go, Grandma, that's a janitor. He doesn't have

9:52

any idea what's going on here. He has no

9:54

context. Let me leave that nice man alone. And

9:57

she goes, He has strong hands. A

10:03

smothering joke from a 96 year old woman. Then

10:07

she threw him a pillow. Then

10:10

we had to

10:12

plan a funeral.

10:19

I don't know if anyone has ever had the displeasure of

10:21

planning a funeral. I'm sorry if you have. It's not a

10:23

very fun thing to do to plan a funeral unless you

10:26

get to plan a funeral for someone who's

10:28

not dead yet. Very

10:30

fun, very fun to call a funeral director

10:32

and go, hi, we

10:34

need a funeral for Sunday. And

10:42

they go, and the deceased is? And you go, not

10:44

deceased. They

10:47

have a lot of questions. Yeah,

10:50

mostly, what? Oh no,

10:52

no, no, no, they will be dead

10:54

on Saturday. Why

10:59

do you know that? Well,

11:02

we have it arranged. It

11:08

took four funeral homes for that to stop being fun

11:10

for me. So

11:17

the day finally comes, which are her words, not

11:19

mine. There's

11:22

one last check in balance that

11:25

the maid program has to do.

11:27

Doctor, patient, nobody else in the room to make

11:29

sure that this is still what they want, that

11:31

no one's been pressuring them into this, and that

11:33

they still want to go through with it. And

11:36

so we get kicked out into the hallway and we're listening in from

11:38

the hallway. We hear the doctors ask,

11:40

Joyce, do you know why you're here today?

11:42

And the answer has to be yes for

11:44

them to go through with this. Joyce, do

11:46

you know why you're here today? We

11:49

hear her answer, no. And

11:53

immediately we go, I didn't push her into this. Was this you? Did

11:55

you push her into this? It was crazy. And we

11:58

get excited because, you know, we go. Maybe she

12:00

just wants to stick around another day, another week, another hour.

12:03

I would love to have my grandmother for one more hour."

12:06

And then we hear her correct herself and she goes,

12:08

No, I don't know why

12:11

I'm still here. I

12:20

asked you for this two weeks ago. What

12:25

is this service in Earls? One

12:32

of the flamerls, why not? We

12:37

laugh and we hear the doctors laugh, and

12:39

then we hear them correct themselves and we go,

12:42

Sorry Joyce, do you know why we're here today,

12:44

Joyce? Do you understand why we are here today?

12:47

And she says, yes. Because it's

12:49

a beautiful day to die. Yeah,

12:51

those are my grandmother's last words. It's a

12:54

beautiful day to die. It's

12:57

also a die hard quote. Yeah,

13:01

pretty easy to let someone go on their

13:04

last words, or Yippee-ki-yay! You

13:07

seem ready. We

13:09

get left back into the room and we get to

13:11

take her hand and sing her Danny Boy like she

13:13

ever requested. We don't all get to take a hand,

13:15

there's 15 of us at this point. Most

13:18

of us are just clutching loose skin. There's

13:22

a lot of it. You

13:25

grab on because you're like, I don't really know what happens next. She's

13:28

a spaceship, maybe we all go. We

13:34

hold on and we sing her Danny Boy, which

13:36

is a beautiful and haunting song, and in

13:39

the rehearsal, we nailed it. Showtime,

13:43

not so much. When

13:47

a Danny Boy fades into just utter

13:49

tears and sobs and silence, my grandmother

13:51

gets to pass happy, surrounded by her

13:54

family, after a long and dignified life,

13:56

and she gets to go out on her

13:58

own terms. still

14:00

mean that my grandmother, our matriarch, the

14:02

glue that held our family together is

14:04

gone. Anyway.

14:23

He's Vian Arnold and I have to

14:25

mention that I watched that set live

14:27

in Winnipeg when it was recorded and

14:29

I really enjoyed watching Dion take that

14:31

delicate subject and making it

14:33

so funny and endearing. And that set

14:35

is actually a condensed version of a

14:38

very funny Fringe show that he toured

14:40

in Canada, the UK and Australia. It's

14:42

called How I Killed My Nan and

14:44

you can find more of Dion Arnold

14:47

at Lord Walmart on Instagram.

14:51

Alright, one announcement to make. If you're

14:53

on Prince Edward Island or you can get

14:55

there, I wanted to let

14:57

you know about an upcoming recording we're

15:00

doing in Charlottetown. We'll be

15:02

at the Trailside Music Hall on Wednesday,

15:04

April 17th and don't be fooled by

15:06

the music in the name. We are

15:08

coming to town to record some terrific

15:11

comedians, including some newcomers

15:13

to laugh out loud like

15:15

Sean Hogan, Tanya Nicole, Britt

15:17

Campbell, Taylor Carver, Catherine Cairns

15:20

and a regular on CBC's

15:22

The Debaters, Patrick Ledwell. Some

15:24

of the absolute funniest performers

15:26

on Prince Edward Island, all

15:29

under one roof at the same time. You'll

15:31

want to reserve your tickets as soon as

15:33

you can because with a lineup like that,

15:35

this show will sell out quickly. Head

15:38

to our website cbc.ca/laugh

15:40

out loud. Sometimes

15:43

when the moment is right and the sparks

15:46

fly, dating can be

15:48

magic. But even the most

15:50

romantic connection can get a little awkward

15:52

and the dog's kind of watching us

15:54

at this point and so it's starting

15:56

to lick my ear. True dating stories

15:58

is the new CBC News. podcast that

16:01

explores the messy corners of romance. Real-life

16:03

tales told by the people who live

16:05

them. I'm tied up on this dude's

16:07

bed and there's nobody around to help. True

16:10

dating stories available from CBC Listen or

16:12

wherever you get your podcasts. All

16:16

right, let's get back to our show. This

16:19

next comedian is one of my dearest

16:21

friends in comedy. We started months apart

16:23

in Montreal many years ago now, and

16:26

she has over the years performed all

16:28

over the world, including the Just for

16:30

Last Festival in Sydney, Australia. She's

16:32

opened for Patton Oswaltz a number of

16:34

times. She and her wife Jess

16:37

Solomon make up a terrific duo that also

16:39

tours this continent together, and she

16:41

was on the Rick Mercer Comedy Night in

16:43

Canada tour across this country. Well,

16:46

except for that period where she got

16:48

COVID and was confined to a hotel

16:50

in Thunder Bay, Ontario for seven days.

16:52

But that is another story for another

16:55

time from the Die Laughing Gala at

16:57

the Winnipeg Comedy Festival. Here is

16:59

Iman El-Husseini. Oh, the topics

17:02

are Die Laughing

17:06

Gala. Do you guys hear me? Perfect.

17:09

Die Laughing Gala, the topics are

17:11

death and dying. This is a packed

17:13

house. What is wrong with you people?

17:15

What is? This

17:17

is crazy. I'm so happy to be

17:20

back in Winnipeg. Beautiful weather you guys

17:22

are having. That must be

17:24

us first. Right? It's

17:26

me. It's all me. Right? Is it

17:29

me? Thank

17:31

you. They don't agree with you,

17:33

but thank you. Is

17:35

it just me or global warming suits you

17:37

guys? It really... I say

17:40

die tan. That's what I say. That's my

17:42

motto. It's good to be back in Canada.

17:45

I live in the US now. It's

17:47

nice to come on stage without my purse on

17:50

me. It's

17:53

huge. In America, the comics are always like,

17:55

leave your purse with us. I'm like, I've seen

17:57

your movies, America. No, thank you. No,

17:59

thank you. The off your student as and then we'll

18:01

talk here that I'm saying that. I'm

18:05

a speech to be back in Winnipeg.

18:07

I yes, are you guys have a

18:09

bit of a bad reputation. You

18:12

do you do you say you ask

18:14

people why? Hey whoa, what did he

18:16

say about Winnipeg? The like? Nothing. nobody

18:18

says anything. Out

18:20

of i discovered why you guys have

18:23

a bad reputation zoo and sent his

18:25

calling Nine One One did you notice

18:27

about yourself You incentive calling the police?

18:29

You're the first carrots you guys. Physicists:

18:35

We're. So proud about it so itself.

18:39

This. Is your Canadian Heritage

18:41

minutes? Hello

18:43

on why I see black

18:45

people. This is my. My.

18:50

My name is Karen. Is Karen. All

18:55

kidding aside, you guys. Ah, I see

18:57

like the world is divided more than

19:00

ever before. and I think it's ah,

19:02

it's crazy. But there's one thing that

19:04

we all agree on. The fear of

19:07

death. Nobody wants to die. It's almost

19:09

unanimous rights or fear of dying. Ah,

19:11

some of us are afraid because we

19:13

don't want to suffer. Others are afraid

19:16

is were afraid of the unknown. Ah,

19:18

but were afraid to die. Speed of

19:20

Light Popular bullies are usually a misconception.

19:23

You. Know are inaccurate like.

19:26

I found that today. That. You could

19:28

swim right after you eat. You don't

19:30

have to wait for thirty minutes. And

19:33

I promise I'm not trying to kill

19:36

you. This is true. You know either,

19:38

either. Common belief. Ah, the cops are

19:40

here to. Protect and serve.

19:43

You guys. Know that you incentives s

19:46

another one a size as a

19:48

matter, You know? What

19:53

is that? It's like out what is.

19:55

Therefore, we're all afraid of it. But

19:57

what if? All right. Like I suspect.

20:00

Perfect. It's a bit like when you get

20:02

inside a top priority you're dreading to go

20:04

to S, but you have to go and

20:06

you end up having the best time. What

20:10

is that has like that? What is the

20:12

after is the after. Party of the

20:14

Century? What about? You

20:17

get there and you're like oh my

20:19

god the tourists the I Geez here

20:22

to pop Nina Simone, Princess Diana, Oh

20:24

My God, Freddie Mercury and David Bowie

20:26

are singing karaoke right here. Betty

20:30

Way is reunited with her

20:32

husband Jesus Christ. This is

20:34

Amazing! Jesus was like asked

20:37

a similar com esse. What?

20:42

If that's the purpose for us

20:44

to die like, that's what successfully

20:46

got a standing up as looking

20:49

at us like these people. I'm

20:51

giving them hero when case sea

20:53

ice cream cakes and they're running

20:55

on a treadmill. Are you kidding.

20:57

Me: Yoga

20:59

Also you hot yoga. Wait till you

21:01

get here. It's.

21:10

Prisoners in heaven or hell. Ah, people

21:12

are afraid of that. Nobody wants to

21:14

go to house. I yeah and I

21:16

muslim. And gay. I.

21:18

Drink alcohol. I don't pray five times

21:20

a day, I eat pork and basically

21:22

Christian. I'm basically. Looking.

21:33

For the. People

21:39

believe everybody's going to. Everybody

21:42

so retail were very angry people. Okay

21:44

with that. The. Hottest countries in the world

21:47

and we got all of the hair all of

21:49

have. Were. Very

21:51

angry. This is why I prefer

21:53

Judaism's interpretation they don't believe and

21:56

house. right? And they control.

21:58

the world so Some

22:01

of you are afraid to laugh. You could laugh at this joke. You

22:04

could laugh. Listen, my wife

22:06

is Jewish, so she

22:09

hates the joke, but whatever. She just... I

22:14

am... Well,

22:18

even like things that are so healthy,

22:20

they're so... Like anything that's bad for

22:22

us is amazing, right? It tastes so

22:24

good. Anything that's... Has anybody

22:27

craved broccoli ever? Ever. Unless

22:30

it's fried and stuffed with cheese, nobody

22:32

cares. Nobody... I

22:36

am married to a woman. I did come out formally. I

22:38

don't think it's important anymore. It's 2022, right? Who

22:41

cares? You're also looking at

22:43

me like, well, you see it. It's fine. It's

22:45

fine. Is

22:48

that why you're dressed like you just auditioned for the

22:50

Village People? Is that why? Yes,

22:53

it is. Thank you for asking. I

22:57

am gay married. I'm glad my marriage

22:59

survived the pandemic, you guys, because it

23:02

was a lot of unwanted

23:04

FaceTime. You know what I mean? For

23:07

two and a half years, this is the only

23:09

conversation we have. Two and a half years.

23:11

You walked the dog? Did she poo? She didn't poo.

23:14

Maybe she'll poo on the next one. That's it. For two and

23:16

a half years... I think our marriage

23:18

survived too, because when the pandemic started,

23:21

we left New York and

23:34

came back to Canada, because I was just

23:36

like, you see the dead bodies piling up

23:38

in body bags. I'm like, we're out of

23:40

here. I cannot die in an emergency room.

23:42

It's not part of the plan. So let's

23:44

go back to Canada. We went back to

23:46

Canada, and we were

23:48

in the middle of nowhere, and my wife loved

23:51

it. We were in the country. She loves that.

23:54

I can't fall

23:56

asleep to silence. That's

23:58

why I moved to New York. I moved to

24:01

New York because I fall asleep to the

24:03

sound of sirens and honking, people screaming, people

24:05

clinging to life. You know what I mean?

24:08

That's the sound

24:11

that I like to fall asleep to. But

24:14

my wife wants it. She's like, it's so serene.

24:16

It's so beautiful. It's so quiet. I'm like, no,

24:18

this is not. This is the beginning. This is

24:20

how every horror movie starts. Right?

24:26

And my wife does this thing. She has this weird thing.

24:28

She has a lot of weird things. She does this other

24:30

thing where I'm like, we'll be sitting in the room together

24:33

for three hours, three hours in silence.

24:36

As soon as I get up to go to the washroom, she's like,

24:38

you know what? I want to tell you something. What?

24:41

I just... But

24:44

the weirdest that she does is that she

24:46

likes to tell me her worries so she

24:49

could fall asleep. And

24:57

I'm Palestinian. I'm used

24:59

to political instability. You know what I

25:02

mean? I fall asleep in

25:04

a second. But her, she needs to

25:06

tell me her worries. So the first

25:08

night we get to this place, as

25:11

soon as I'm about to doze off,

25:13

her timing is perfect. As soon as

25:15

my eyes are closing, she says, wow,

25:17

it's really quiet and serene

25:19

and peaceful. If we

25:21

get murdered, if

25:24

we get murdered, people might not find

25:26

us for months, maybe

25:29

even years. Okay,

25:31

good night. It's

25:36

done. The other day we're talking

25:38

about climate change. She's like, climate change is real. I'm

25:40

so worried about climate change. I'm like, I agree with

25:42

you. It's so bad. I think

25:45

we have like 50 years to go. And she's

25:47

like, 10 years tops. Okay, good night.

25:55

She's Jewish and Palestinian. She's my reparations.

25:57

I, uh... She

26:02

doesn't think I'm afraid of dying, which is not true.

26:04

I'm not brave at all. Like, I sleep with the

26:06

night light. You know what I mean? I'm

26:08

brave during the day, but at night, I'm

26:11

too scared. I can't sleep in the dark. I'm not afraid of

26:14

death. She's just terrified of

26:16

death. Like, terrified. She cries when there's

26:18

turbulence on the plane. That's how scared

26:21

she is, all of you, too. Okay, I

26:23

am. And

26:26

once we got into a huge fight, and

26:29

she threatened to crash the car, but

26:32

we were in a parking lot. Like,

26:35

parked in a parking lot. And

26:38

like, this woman clearly has never thought of

26:41

committing suicide. There's no way. I'm

26:44

like, do you want to come

26:46

in the driver's seat? Do you

26:48

want the car keys? What?

26:56

It's not that I'm not afraid of

26:58

death. I like planning my funeral. I

27:00

want a big festive funeral. And I

27:03

talk about that, and she hates it.

27:05

She hates it. Well, this is

27:07

the thing, too. We had a health scare. She

27:09

had cervical cancer. Now she doesn't

27:11

have a uterus. She took it

27:14

out, which has been amazing for our relationship,

27:16

because just one period. Right?

27:21

So I try to plan our funeral.

27:29

She doesn't like it, because I'm like, listen, I

27:31

want a mausoleum. I don't want to go under

27:33

ground. I want a

27:35

mausoleum above ground, and I want a double

27:37

coffin so we could spoon in the afterlife.

27:41

But we have to find a cemetery that has both

27:44

Muslim and Jewish, and we have to

27:46

be at the border. So,

27:50

spooning. So it's respecting both

27:52

of our religions. And

27:54

she's like, anything else? I'm like, no,

27:58

that's it. Good night. That's... You

28:00

guys are amazing. Can't you tell? That

28:08

is Iman Ilhosseini and you can look

28:10

up her album, Handsome Daughter Online. My

28:14

thanks today to the Winnipeg Comedy

28:16

Festival and sound engineers Brian Harder

28:18

and Laura Antonelli and Tracy

28:20

Rideout. And a special thanks to

28:22

my producer Lee Pitts. And

28:25

a final thanks to you for listening to

28:27

Laugh Out Loud on CBC Radio 1, SiriusXM

28:31

and the free CBC Listen app or

28:33

from our podcast. You can always subscribe

28:35

to our podcast and get a new

28:37

episode each week. My name is

28:39

Ali Hassan. I'll see you back here real

28:42

soon.

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