I wish that someone would have talked to me early on in leadership about the cost it has on others... AKA myself.

We need to realize that we will affect others with the decisions we make... 

Even the perfect decisions that couldn't have gone any better...

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So today we are going to talk about how your decisions as a leader affect those around you…

We’ve been reading in Exodus as a family and chapter five… wow for leadership this is huge for us

Not the typical story of leading the nation Israel out of captivity 

Nope this is the part where it gets worse before better

5 Afterward Moses and Aaron went to Pharaoh and said, “This is what the Lord, the God of Israel, says: ‘Let my people go, so that they may hold a festival to me in the wilderness.’”

2 Pharaoh said, “Who is the Lord, that I should obey him and let Israel go? I do not know the Lord and I will not let Israel go.”

4 But the king of Egypt said, “Moses and Aaron, why are you taking the people away from their labor? Get back to your work!” 

6 That same day Pharaoh gave this order to the slave drivers and overseers in charge of the people: 7 “You are no longer to supply the people with straw for making bricks; let them go and gather their straw. 8 But require them to make the same number of bricks as before; don’t reduce the quota. They are lazy; that is why they are crying out, ‘Let us go and sacrifice to our God.’ 9 Make the work harder for the people so that they keep working and pay no attention to lies.”

15 Then the Israelite overseers went and appealed to Pharaoh: “Why have you treated your servants this way? 16 Your servants are given no straw, yet we are told, ‘Make bricks!’ Your servants are being beaten, but the fault is with your people.”

17 Pharaoh said, “Lazy, that’s what you are—lazy! That is why you keep saying, ‘Let us go and sacrifice to the Lord.’ 18 Now get to work. You will not be given any straw, yet you must produce your full quota of bricks.”

19 The Israelite overseers realized they were in trouble when they were told, “You are not to reduce the number of bricks required of you for each day.” 20 When they left Pharaoh, they found Moses and Aaron waiting to meet them, 21 and they said, “May the Lord look on you and judge you! You have made us obnoxious to Pharaoh and his officials and have put a sword in their hand to kill us.”

So - why is this a HUGE leadership lesson?

Most leaders I know lead from their insecurity - in other words, they make decisions on what makes the least amount of trouble instead of leading from a God first mentality.

A couple of quick points of what we can learn from this story

1 - Understand the gravity

Moses and Aaron left Gods presence to go tell Pharaoh to let Gods people go

And Pharough then brings down the wrath on the people

Why - cause Moses and Aaron were obedient!

We have to accept that our decisions are important

They will affect more than ourselves - as much as you want it to just be you

It's not - it will affect those you lead on the job, those who look up to you

Your own family

And while the result is something to look forward to - we don’t get to decide the path…

As much as you want to separate the worlds of your decisions and your family.

It isn’t separated 

You get to realize that every decision you make is feeding the future of your family

Even it if includes more hardship.

2 - Do what’s God says - no extras 

You only know this through Christ

Whether it is letting someone go

Or that your decisions carry unintentional consequences

To sugar-coat situations means that we are trying to get people to either come along or get along

Think about that - as leaders in business, in churches, in our own homes - we sometimes make a decision and then try to paint the picture of how little it will affect them,

 It is like we are trying to tell people how to feel and respond…

Isn’t that -= - - - manipulation?

 Stay away from being the person who goes around trying to keep everyone happy

It doesn't work!!!

Now, I am not saying that you are to be harsh or rude in what you do

NO - I am simply saying don’t make an excuse

One of my rules in firing someone is to not apologize unless it is our fault.

In the 100_ people that I have been privileged to let go, only one has stayed mad at me :) 

And not a single was let go because we had to

It was because it was the best thing to do!!!!

Let us look back to Exodus 5 20 When they left Pharaoh, they found Moses and Aaron waiting to meet them, 21 and they said, “May the Lord look on you and judge you! You have made us obnoxious to Pharaoh and his officials and have put a sword in their hand to kill us.”

Ha - they were waiting!!!

Why - cause they didn’t like how it felt…

Not knowing that this was part of the process for them to become a nation!

3 - Get over yourself

What do I mean

Well - too often we live in this lie that our decisions won’t affect anyone… or better, that NO ONE will be effective by your leadership or decision. We have problems with it causing anyone grief… and then you get stuck in this pleasing path. 

I remember when I was watching SHkar tank and heard Kevin Oleary just be almost ornery… to the point that he would say to people who didn’t agree with him… you are dead to me.

And I used to think that was harsh

But when I looked at my life of leading… I realized that I had a lot of troubling times, stress, heart issues, literals spending time in the hospital from stress-induced physical issues. I was literally about to go on vacation and we had rented an RV (because ours wasn’t working) and I was coming home to get ready to go when I had double vision… 

 I'm not sure if you have ever had that, but it was scary - my heart started racing and everything started getting dark around me. I thought -I am going to die right here driving this RV… trying to get away for some time away… 

 I took the next exit and pulled my RV into the parking lot of Silver Cross hospital Chicago… walked to the ER and they immediately admitted me

 Before I know it, I am getting all these tests done to check the condition of my heart. EKG, heart monitor, stress test, dye test… 

At one point I am running on a treadmill with my dress shoes cause that Is all I had!

The result - the doc came to me and asked me what I did for a living

Pastor - 

He smiled, you have to change something, Ben… 

I go back to my impression of Kevin Oleary - 

If what he says is true, that when someone doesn't want to do business with him, they are dead to him - then I bet he is living a much more free life than I was!~

Every hurt feeling, every decision that cost someone something, I would stress over what they thought, if they were hurt because of me and my decisions, could I have done it better or different (and every time I could find what I could have possibly done better and I would find myself at fault).

But when I read what Jesus told the disciples - 

Mark 6:11 And whoever will not receive you nor hear you, when you depart from there, shake off the dust under your feet as a testimony against them. Assuredly, I say to you, it will be more tolerable for Sodom and Gomorrah in the day of judgment than for that city!”

Oh man - we feel like if it was this RIGHT ON then we wouldn’t worry about it

NOPE - if you are like most leaders out there - even when YOU KNOW that it is the right thing to do we get stuck in ourselves

We say it is about others, but it is killing Gus on the inside

Stop!!!!

Let us go back over the points 

So how do I understand gravity?

Pray - get in the spirit and allow him to tell you things to come

I know that can sound a little silly or weird, but it is simply allowing the spirit of God to take your ability to predict and add his knowledge to it. Very rarely is it a vision or complete picture, but many times it is a hunch or a feeling about the situation that you want to pay attention to. Trust me, you want to be side on hearing what God thinks of the situation before you go into the absolute decision.

 So ask God to show you the gravity of the decision you are making

NOT FOR EXCUSES, or even to deflect

But instead, to know the weight of it!

Point number 2 was 0 do exactly what God tells you

How do we do that

Well, write down what you feel he is telling you to do - BEFORE You start planning It out

Then do all the planning you want, preventing, game plan to make the pivot or decision -

And THEN - bring it back to God - Are you in this planning? 

 What are you wanting me to take out of it?

And then as a father, business leader, or pastor - move forward when you KNOW 

Point number 3 was 

 Get over yourself

 Get some emotional strength - we talk about this in my podcast because I believe the number one hindrance to being. The great leader is our own limiting beliefs - even more than blindspots.  

You are not an imposter

You are not a failure

You are not a crazy person who makes irrational decisions

You are not perfect - 

Let me say that again, you are not perfect

You are not responsible for other people behavior

So how do you get over yourself?

Without getting too much into the god-given psychology of how he designed us

We have to grow in our emotional intelligence!

We have to allow GOD to get into every area of our life!

In other words - take an honest look at yourself

 Get in front of the mirror and let God tell you about yourself!

We all learn the same way

We have to see and hear what we need to learn and grow in

In other words

If you are dealing with pride - there are great scriptures that will speak to humility

Ask God to humble you - and I know some of you are like don’t ask God to teach you humility

Cause he will knock you down… and it is ok!!!!

Ask for it - why stay the same???

If you are dealing with imposter syndrome

Study the life of Moses - find someone in the word of God who you can see the faithfulness of God!

Get scripture and find out from God … where you have pride

Yep - I have found that insecurity is pride… 

It is us withholding Gods best for others because we are thinking about ourselves

So #1 get before God

#2 get in the word

And #3 - get some good words from mentors, books, coach!

So go

I hope this podcast will create some good fruit for you

You got this - you will be making decisions that will affect people, instead of acting like it won’t.. own it and grow it!!!