0:02

Hey guys, and welcome back to this week's

0:04

episode of the Let's Be Real Podcast. As

0:07

always, I'm your host, Sammy Jay, and welcome.

0:09

Thank you so much for taking the time to listen. This

0:12

week, I got to chat with the incredibly talented

0:14

Cassidy Pope. Now you may know her from

0:17

the band Hey Monday, or from

0:19

winning Season three of The Boys, which I actually

0:21

voted for her, so glad you won, um,

0:24

and she actually came out with an album called

0:26

Thrive and it is quite incredible.

0:29

UM. We have a really down to earth chat about

0:31

what it's like being a female artist, especially

0:34

in country music, what it was like winning

0:36

the Voice. She goes into some stories

0:38

that I haven't heard her talk about anywhere

0:40

else, mental health, the importance

0:42

of therapy, and she shares a

0:44

lot about her personal dreaming, which I'm so grateful

0:46

she did. I hope you guys enjoyed this

0:48

episode.

0:54

Cassidy, I am so excited

0:56

that you are on my podcast. I'm excited

0:58

to Before we start, I

1:01

have a quick story to tell you. Okay,

1:03

when you were on the Voice, I

1:05

was what I

1:09

remember so clearly,

1:11

it was my obsession with a

1:13

voice, and I remember I voted for

1:15

you. I was when you first auditioned

1:18

and you performed torn. I was like, oh my

1:20

goodness, and I just remember

1:23

watching the show so vividly. So this

1:25

is very full circle for me that

1:27

you're on my podcast now. Thank you.

1:30

Thanks for voting. I appreciate that.

1:32

It's like, that's level. I mean, I

1:34

think things worked out pretty well. It's

1:37

because of you, because of your vote. That

1:39

vote, man, that that one

1:41

vote, that one vote me and my brother did when we

1:43

called in sent me over. It's

1:46

amazing. Thank you. It feels

1:49

like a I mean, I was a different person, Like

1:51

it was just a whole other life was insane.

1:54

I mean, before the pandemic feels like a different

1:56

life. I agree, like

1:58

nine lives. I feel like it's kind of like a cat

2:00

it is. It is. Yeah, last

2:03

year was like I don't I think it was just a blur.

2:05

You know, we got through it, but it was a blur, right.

2:08

I That's the thing. I'm like randomly

2:11

remembering these weird little memories. I'm like,

2:13

oh wait, that wasn't that long ago,

2:15

but it feels like ten years ago. Yeah,

2:18

it's And this year I feel like has

2:20

flown by because things have opened back up

2:22

and It's like, my endurance

2:24

isn't what it used to be. So if I have like one

2:27

thing to do on it on a day,

2:29

I'm like, all right, I'm gonna get on the couch

2:31

and rest after that one

2:33

thing I had to do today. Oh yeah, I'm

2:36

I'm a freshman in college and I'm living

2:38

on campus, and my social battery I'm

2:40

already like an introvert. But when

2:42

you add a pandemic onto that, my

2:45

oh my, yeah, my social battery

2:47

is like negative zero right all

2:50

the time. It's weird socializing with people

2:52

in person. Yeah, I actually

2:54

found that I think I might prefer the

2:57

internet, UM that

3:00

thing with people like I think it's I

3:02

think when we embrace it, it can

3:04

be really amazing. Like last year getting to UM,

3:07

I did a bunch of meet and greets, FaceTime

3:09

meet and greets with my fans, and I was able to have

3:12

UM writing sessions with people in l A

3:14

and New York and not have to travel, And I

3:16

actually felt like my world in a weird

3:19

way opened up more because I embraced

3:21

the WiFi and the

3:24

interwebs like what it could offer us.

3:26

So you know, it's sometimes

3:28

you just have to lean into it. Oh absolutely,

3:31

And I think it's also it's really weird

3:33

because I'll be watching a movie and I'll be like,

3:35

there are so many people together, they should be wearing

3:37

masks. Why aren't they social distancing And

3:40

the fact that my brain is wired that way now,

3:42

I'm like, it's bizarre. Oh my goodness,

3:44

very bizarre. What is this. There's

3:47

something about being in person and having that

3:49

connection. It's it's so different like

3:51

traveling doing something. It's

3:53

it was a whole to do and I kind

3:55

of missed that. I mean, I think like in doses,

3:58

both things are great, like being

4:00

able to be remote when it's

4:02

convenient and being able to travel when you

4:04

want to. It's like, that's that's ideal.

4:07

But when you're forced into one thing,

4:09

it's that that it's not very fun. Oh

4:11

absolutely. I have a morning class

4:13

at eight thirty and there's a zoom

4:16

option, and it has been so fantastic

4:19

embracing that zoom option because I don't

4:21

I who wants to walk across campus at like it in

4:23

the morning. Not me. Yeah. Now

4:26

you can stay in your pjs and sip

4:29

that coffee. Yeah, stay in bed,

4:31

that's the way to do it. So

4:34

much art has come out of this pandemic,

4:36

and it's like for everybody, it's given us

4:38

time to really reflect and just think about

4:41

what we've done, where we want to go. And

4:45

something that I've been struggling with

4:47

and learning to cope with is

4:50

not having your identity be around

4:52

my career, around one thing, but having

4:54

an identity outside of that. When

4:57

the pandemic first hit, before we knew

4:59

how long it be, zoom writing

5:01

sessions started. What was that period

5:04

like for you as an artist not being

5:06

able to perform live and kind of being

5:09

still with yourself. It was definitely

5:12

a struggle. I mean I I do the same where

5:14

I put a lot of my self worth and how

5:16

busy I am? What what's going on

5:18

for me? Are people paying attention? Is

5:21

it a busy time or is it just like one

5:23

off season? You know? And um,

5:26

I think at first it was a jolt and

5:28

it was like, oh my god, like what's

5:30

going to happen? And I don't know

5:32

what to do with myself? Um. And then

5:34

because it was a worldwide

5:37

situation and I was not the

5:39

only artist who was having some

5:42

quiet season, um,

5:44

it kind of brought me comfort in a way that like,

5:46

Okay, we're all in this together in very

5:48

different levels. But um,

5:51

we are all like losing

5:53

our tours and not able to travel,

5:55

not able to see our fans in person. So it

5:57

was weird. And then I sort of,

6:00

um, like I said before, kind of embraced

6:03

the situation and was like, Okay, if I can't go

6:05

anywhere and I can't tour and do what I love, I'm

6:08

gonna do the second best thing

6:10

and write on Zoom. And that's

6:12

and I wrote the whole album on zoom

6:15

um and wrote with people

6:17

for the first time that I ended up just loving writing

6:19

with actually found my producer

6:22

through one of the writing sessions on zoom, So it

6:24

ended up, you know, becoming a very positive

6:26

experience. But it was very bitter

6:29

sweet because I wasn't getting, you know,

6:31

the aspect that I love the most in my

6:33

career, which is playing live. That's

6:35

what's so awesome. You wrote an entire

6:37

album from your home, and

6:39

I think we're at this place where, like you said,

6:41

it's all about perspective and we can

6:44

choose to look on the negative side

6:46

of things or really turn something into a

6:48

positive or make the best out of any situation.

6:51

And yeah, I think something that's

6:53

really special about this album Thrive is

6:55

that you're not limiting yourself.

6:58

You know, there are for a while, there's

7:00

you did country, you did rock, you did punk,

7:03

but you're really just merging all

7:05

three creating your own lane, which is very

7:07

hard to do as an artist, especially

7:09

being a female artist. You're in

7:11

in the country music industry, which is also

7:13

a very male dominated industry, and

7:16

I think paving your own lane is so special.

7:18

What was that process like? Yeah,

7:20

definitely, I mean I was going I

7:23

was about to go in the studio in April um

7:25

and and cut some songs that I

7:27

loved that felt very country

7:29

radio friendly, felt like a very

7:31

safe UM route for me

7:33

to take. And then once the pandemic hit

7:36

and it sort of forced me to think

7:39

about things a little bit deeper and

7:41

and honestly, like talking to my

7:44

management team about it, um

7:46

I had just done a Hey Monday reunion

7:48

show at the end of twenty nineteen, and they were like,

7:51

we've never seen that side of you, so

7:53

we're fans, uh. And then

7:55

so once we started having those conversations, they were

7:57

like, you know you you can

7:59

do is authentically like you come from

8:02

that pop punk world and you grew

8:04

up singing country music. So they're both

8:07

authentic to you. What if you just leaned

8:09

in more into the pop punk thing and

8:12

see where it takes you? UM, And it was

8:14

really an intentional thing going into each

8:16

session. UM. You know, the songwriters

8:19

that I was writing with, we're all briefed by

8:21

my publisher on the direction I'm

8:23

going forward and UM the vision

8:25

I had and so, and just going in with songwriters

8:28

that helped sort of aid me in

8:30

that direction to UM was really

8:32

great. But but just going into every session

8:35

with you know these probably

8:37

I guess nine years of UM

8:39

songwriting experience in Nashville,

8:42

but merging you know, my pop punk

8:45

roots and it was just a

8:47

really natural process. I didn't feel

8:50

like I was compromising anything. I didn't feel

8:52

like I was chasing anything. I had a goal in mind,

8:54

but it felt like a goal that

8:56

I I could achieve

8:59

very easy, elite, you know. So I UM

9:02

had a lot of fun making this record. And

9:04

I went in the studio with the band

9:06

and I was you know,

9:09

my I was just right up there at the control

9:11

board like constantly, you

9:14

know, co producing with with Nick Wheeler,

9:16

my producer, and Karen Fairchild,

9:18

my co producer, and it just felt like a

9:20

very from start to finish, a very hands

9:23

on, precious kind of process.

9:26

I want to read you something because I rewatched your audition

9:28

for the Boys and Christina Aguilaric

9:31

said something that kind of foreshadowed what's

9:33

happening now. She said, you have a little

9:35

country in there that you could do something with. You

9:37

have something that's popped driven, something that's

9:39

a little rock, and you can kind of do it all.

9:42

Wow. I don't remember saying

9:44

that. Jeez, that's cool.

9:46

That's what you're doing now, you

9:48

know what. And I that's that's

9:51

actually crazy hearing that from

9:53

her, because she's like the same she can. I feel

9:55

like she could do it all too, So that's

9:57

that's pretty cool. And and like the fans

10:00

that I've all kind of

10:02

coined the genre, um

10:04

calling it the alternative, which is really fun.

10:06

So I'm kind of taking it and running

10:08

with it and makeing merch and stuff. Absolutely

10:12

you should, yeah, absolutely,

10:14

And I think that's one of the things, like doing

10:17

something that's not what everyone else is doing

10:19

can be really difficult, especially

10:22

being an artist, being a young female

10:24

artist, there are so many pressures of what you should

10:26

be or what you should look like. Um,

10:29

was there a certain moment besides the Hey Monday

10:31

reunion, where you're like,

10:33

man, I really miss this

10:35

side to me that I haven't been fully letting

10:38

UM show through my music.

10:40

Oh that's a good question. Um.

10:43

I think when I'm on stage

10:45

and I am playing

10:48

either Hey Monday song or just like one of

10:50

my UM newer songs

10:52

that leans a little bit more rock, or

10:55

covering a rock song or something, I

10:58

do have that like I get that itch,

11:00

or I used to, and now that I have this album,

11:02

I'm not really feeling that way anymore, but I would

11:04

get that itch like gosh, like how

11:06

fun would it be to just kind of go back to that

11:09

and and like go crazy on

11:11

stage and not worry about being

11:13

to this or to that, not being

11:16

country enough, or even in the rock

11:18

realm. You know, I never felt weird

11:21

enough or tortured enough or

11:23

anything like you know, all of our favorite

11:25

rock stars were always these,

11:27

uh, tortured soulds, you don't

11:29

fit the mold of what they say. Yeah,

11:32

And I I never felt that way in any

11:34

any platform I've been in UM, which

11:37

is really led me to this

11:39

point of like, oh, I think I just I'm

11:41

a bunch of things and I

11:43

don't know where that's gonna land me. I don't know if that's

11:45

going to bring me all the awards in the world

11:48

or it's gonna get me a Grammy, But

11:50

I I know that it's me, and I

11:52

know if people like it, then they like me

11:55

for who I am. So that's kind

11:57

of that was why I was like, Okay, I think I'm

11:59

down to just kind of see

12:01

where this goes. Yeah, I mean,

12:03

you were just being Cassidy, and that's all we

12:05

can all do at the end of the day is just be ourselves

12:08

because there's only one of you and

12:10

there's a reason for that. And I think something

12:12

that's really interesting with your

12:14

writing. It's just very authentic

12:17

and it's use a storytelling,

12:19

which I feel like in a lot of songs

12:22

nowadays, it's very it's

12:24

meaningless, you know, they're just words together

12:26

that sound nice with the pop feed and

12:29

no shape to anyone that does that sometimes

12:31

like that that's a great vibe to be in, you know

12:33

what I mean. Yeah, it's super catchy.

12:35

Yeah, but it's having those

12:38

lyrics and being able to tell a story

12:40

with your music can relate

12:43

to more people. What do you love

12:45

about storytelling? Because that's what music

12:47

is. Essentially, I'm always

12:49

really surprised at the

12:53

songs that I feel are really specifically

12:56

personal to me, how they

12:58

connect with so many people. Um,

13:00

I've put out songs that I'm like, this

13:02

is a very very

13:05

specific situation that maybe

13:08

not many other people have been through, and then

13:10

I put it out and it's like, oh, well, like obviously

13:13

I'm not alone here, and it's like a very you

13:16

know, therapeutic process. Because

13:18

while I really appreciate

13:21

fans who say this has helped me through this or that,

13:23

they're also helping me to not feel

13:26

so crazy and alone in my feelings.

13:28

So, um, that's always been surprising to

13:30

me. With like storytelling is is as

13:33

a songwriter, we're kind of taught

13:35

to make it appeal

13:37

to everybody. Don't make

13:40

it super gender specific or like

13:42

a cultural culturally specific

13:45

song, or you know, the people and a

13:47

small town aren't going to relate to this like city

13:49

song or whatever the reasons

13:51

are. We're always told as songwriters

13:53

to try and make things connect with everyone,

13:56

and that's why we get the super water

13:58

down lyrics and the really catchy songs,

14:00

but they don't really say much because

14:02

that is it, and it works that

14:05

is that is something that works. But it

14:07

also works when people get specific like Taylor

14:09

Swift and Adele and Harry

14:12

Styles and you know, I think that that

14:14

that's uh, if it's

14:17

done right, that that

14:19

blows up just as big as the very um

14:22

safe songs. Absolutely,

14:24

And I think something that I love

14:26

your title Thrive because I

14:28

feel like we've been surviving,

14:30

but we should all we should all aim to thrive.

14:34

What was the process? What is your writing process

14:36

generally? Do you have a concept of mind?

14:39

Do you start with the lyrics, the melodies,

14:41

the title. It's different every time. I

14:43

mean the biggest difference writing this album, of course,

14:46

was it was on Zoom. But um,

14:48

it didn't really change as far as the process

14:50

of Like for Thrive,

14:52

for instance, I brought in UM

14:55

the first verse, and I brought in

14:57

the what I wanted the hook to be, like,

15:00

I didn't just survive without you know, I thrive

15:03

and we went from there. Um

15:05

And some sessions are like I

15:08

have a whole chorus, Uh, some sessions

15:10

I have just a melody. There

15:12

were a few that I just brought a concept

15:14

in. I didn't have any lyrics or any melodies

15:17

to it. I just had the concept so

15:19

it just depends. And the thing

15:21

that I think is really great about when you

15:23

have a publisher who really knows your strengths and

15:25

your weaknesses is they will put you

15:27

in a room with people who catered to where

15:30

your weaknesses are. And that's something

15:32

that I really appreciated through

15:34

this process because I I did

15:36

want to really focus on storytelling

15:39

and being honest and and kind of staying

15:42

the course and not getting too distracted

15:44

about other things, UM

15:46

like who it would appeal to. And

15:49

once that sort of like

15:51

solidified itself and that was the process,

15:54

it really just was like just

15:56

flowing and every session, UM,

15:59

something I'll amazing would come out, and

16:01

but I always I always brought in something

16:04

UM, so that I think that was a good

16:06

like launching pad for all the sessions. What

16:09

would you say the biggest thing you've learned

16:11

about yourself writing this album has been

16:13

I've learned that I

16:16

I carried a lot of shame

16:18

about a lot of things, UM,

16:21

from like breaking someone's heart to

16:24

UM feeling spiteful to

16:29

um you

16:31

know, something happening when I was

16:33

younger that I look

16:36

back on and as an adult and I'm like,

16:39

I actually didn't know better because I was really

16:41

young, um, whereas before I had a

16:43

lot of shame about these things. And so the writing

16:45

process was was again therapeutic

16:48

because I kind of let myself,

16:51

I let myself kind of feel like

16:53

like a victim a little bit. And I've never

16:56

really been into that, Like I've always

16:59

taken a acountability for my decisions

17:01

and um never wanted, never

17:04

wanted to people to feel bad

17:06

for me. So I tried to

17:09

sound stronger in my songs, and this

17:12

time around, I just leaned into the real

17:15

feelings of shame and disappointment,

17:17

embarrassment and hurt and feeling

17:20

like a victim and all those things. So like, yeah,

17:22

I just I guess the thing I learned about myself

17:24

was that I was almost um

17:27

trying to protect myself for

17:29

a very long time, but in reality,

17:32

I was just UM keeping

17:34

everybody at arm's length. I think

17:36

that's so interesting that you say that, because

17:39

we go through things through life and we have

17:41

shame towards and a lot of things we shouldn't because,

17:43

like you said, we're all on a journey and we're

17:46

all growing and it's part of the experience.

17:48

And I think being able to turn something that you were

17:50

shameful of, but vocalize it

17:52

really takes that shame away from it. Would

17:54

you say you felt that way through writing? Yeah,

17:56

I think talking about it definitely does. I mean, anytime

17:59

you're talking about a trauma or

18:01

something that that hurt you in the

18:03

past, every time you talk about it, you're

18:06

releasing it more and more each

18:08

conversation. So I definitely

18:10

feel like this

18:13

album is is heavily rooted

18:15

in my journey with mental health

18:17

to like just being very vocal

18:20

about things that are really uncomfortable

18:22

to talk about, that people stigmatize

18:24

and make us feel weird

18:27

when we express things, and

18:29

and just kind of like throwing

18:31

that all away and just um,

18:33

you know, I hope I made people uncomfortable with

18:35

some of these songs. I hope it

18:37

made people think be comfortable with the uncomfortable.

18:40

Yeah. Yeah, And that's like that's what

18:42

my favorite artists do for me, is like they

18:44

make me uncomfortable in a

18:46

good way. So we're growing. If

18:48

we're uncomfortable, I think we have to

18:50

take one quick break, but when we come back,

18:52

I want to talk more about the topic of mental

18:55

health. The best advice you've received in

18:57

therapy pushing ourselves to be

18:59

more uncome triable and to grow your

19:01

experience on the voice and so much

19:03

more. We'll be right back, and

19:11

we're back. Julian michaels

19:13

a song called Anxiety, and it was the first

19:15

time I ever listened to where I was like, I

19:18

feel attacked. This is too accurate

19:20

to my entire life, Like she put words

19:23

to a feeling I couldn't even

19:25

describe, which was truly that's

19:28

what's the power of music, I feel like,

19:30

and um for people who have listened

19:32

before, I've been so honest. I've struggled

19:34

with anxiety and o c D my entire life

19:37

and I used to be so scared, but

19:39

no, it's working on yourself and being a

19:41

better person. By having these open

19:43

conversations. We're not giving it the

19:46

power, right, Yeah. And I feel

19:48

like people do see therapy as

19:50

this last resort. You gotta hit

19:52

rock bottom before you go. We

19:54

have to wait for a crisis, and it's like, man,

19:58

I did that and it was awful,

20:00

and so I wish I had done

20:03

some work because

20:05

I had plenty of things that I knew would mess

20:07

me up, like my parents divorce and my

20:09

dad leaving us, and you know, being

20:11

in the industry since I was like twelve. Um,

20:14

a lot of weird people in and out of my life,

20:17

taking advantage and stuff, and just being

20:19

a young kid around a bunch of older people

20:22

in the industry. And I if

20:24

I had just seeked some

20:26

help and started sort

20:28

of confronting some of the

20:30

things I was feeling at an early age, I

20:33

mean, I wouldn't be here right now, so I would

20:35

be I'm not going to say like

20:37

I want things. I wished things turned out

20:39

differently, but it would have been it

20:41

would have been really helpful to have some tools being

20:44

eighteen on the road just mayhem,

20:48

like be like a tornado traveling

20:51

eighteen year old tornado girl traveling

20:53

the world, Like, yeah, that would have been useful.

20:56

And it's a lot putting

20:58

yourself out there and your song in in the spotlight

21:00

and touring when you're eighteen and meeting

21:03

all these people, what would you say

21:05

the best tool you've learned is in

21:07

your journey in therapy?

21:09

Because I have quite some tools in my toolblocks.

21:12

I'm just curious. I always love asking people

21:14

what they've learned. Yeah, totally.

21:16

I mean, there's there's so many things I learned.

21:18

Um, I A big

21:21

thing was not taking everything personally,

21:23

UM, because I was always

21:26

so concerned with

21:28

what people thought about me. If they canceled,

21:31

I feel you right, Like, if they canceled

21:33

on me last minute to hang, I'd be like,

21:35

oh, it's because I said this one time and they're

21:38

mad at me and and like

21:40

and then I sort of once

21:42

I started therapy, I realized

21:45

how like borderline

21:47

narcissistic that is of

21:50

like, you know, obviously

21:52

it's it's insecurities too, but why

21:55

would my first thought be that

21:57

them canceling on me is about me. It's

22:00

it's usually not, and it's usually

22:03

because something came up or maybe they

22:05

just don't feel like it's not about me. It's that it's something

22:07

they're going through. And so that was really helpful

22:09

because, Um, once

22:11

you feel that, and once you really like accept

22:14

that don't take things personally, you

22:17

aren't as affected by other people's decisions.

22:19

And that's power. That's like where

22:21

you take it back, um,

22:24

which is which is really nice.

22:27

And then I think to just, um,

22:29

seeing how things from my childhood affected

22:32

me as an adult, that stuff, even

22:34

though it can't it can't change anything that's

22:37

happened, it still is like

22:39

seeing it through the lens of you

22:41

know, the reason you dated

22:43

these people or the reason you made

22:46

these bad decisions. Like think

22:48

about that that stuff that happened as

22:50

a kid and your parents fighting or your parents

22:52

divorce or whatever it may

22:54

be. Um that that

22:57

directly affects you now as what

22:59

you're making your decisions, and it's like internalized

23:02

trauma that you haven't let go of yet.

23:04

And so that while it again

23:07

it doesn't like cure me, it's

23:09

it is to be self aware is

23:11

it's so important. It's so powerful,

23:14

and to be able to know that, Okay,

23:16

this is why I did this, and how can I

23:18

move forward to not repeat those same actions?

23:21

It's huge. I'm actually reading a book by

23:24

Oprah and Dr Perry called What Happened to You,

23:26

which I'm trying to get more into reading. I'm

23:28

really trying to better myself all around.

23:30

I'm trying to meditate and just everything, and

23:33

I'm really enjoying this book and it kind of

23:35

goes into what we're talking about, what has happened

23:38

in our past, how our brain stores it, and

23:40

how that reflects in the actions we do, which

23:43

is super interesting. Our brains

23:45

are crazy. Yeah, I

23:48

I um, I started trauma therapy

23:50

like four months ago, and

23:53

I, um, there were so many

23:55

moments where I'm like, I don't know why

23:58

I'm so triggered by when somebody

24:00

says this to me, or when my boyfriend

24:02

does this, or you know, when my mom

24:04

says this. And doing trauma

24:06

therapy is the most bizarre

24:09

process because it will literally

24:12

pop into your brain something that was said or done

24:14

to you as a kid, and you're like, that's

24:16

why I don't handle

24:19

this phrase well, or I don't

24:21

handle it well when somebody,

24:24

you know, if my boyfriend walks ahead of me in a social

24:26

setting and I feel abandoned like

24:29

that, that kind of those small moments

24:31

that really trigger me and just to know

24:33

where they come from is so great.

24:35

And then like targeting those memories and

24:37

reprocessing them to not affect

24:40

you as badly is a game

24:43

changer like that, That kind of

24:45

therapy has been amazing

24:47

for me. And it's not even like, Okay,

24:49

this happened in the past, but then you can work on

24:51

how to because you're aware of

24:53

it, how to make that not trigger you so much in the

24:55

future. Yeah, it's taking the power back,

24:58

which is so powerful, and I feel like I

25:00

don't know, I could go on about therapy for hours.

25:02

I highly recommend it. It's it's just

25:05

if you want to be grow as a human, you don't have

25:07

to have issues to go to therapy, which is a weird

25:10

stigma with it. Obviously you want to go into therapy

25:12

for yourself to feel better and um

25:15

improve and and just know yourself

25:17

better. But the collateral, like

25:20

the positive collateral from that is

25:22

so amazing, Like your your relationships

25:24

to get better. Um, you

25:26

might you might lose some relationships.

25:28

The more you grow, the more you might grow away

25:30

from people. And that's okay, that's not

25:33

a bad thing though, it's not a bad thing.

25:35

It's actually really great

25:37

because you're the more you step into yourself

25:39

and who you really want to be, the more you

25:41

become aligned with people that will

25:43

help you with that, you know. So it's

25:46

it's just all around, like it helps everybody

25:48

around involved, like you and

25:51

the people that are that you're in relationship

25:53

with. And I know you said you you're in Hey

25:55

Monday before the voice, but you said you've been in the industry

25:57

since you were twelve. Yeah, what were you

26:00

doing at twelve? I know, it's

26:03

it's been a long journey. Um, I

26:06

was. I took voice lessons from four years

26:08

old, and then my voice coach would

26:10

get all of her students together to go play

26:12

at fairs and festivals and really

26:14

got us on stage young, which is great.

26:17

And I think I was playing some fair

26:19

or festival in West Palm Beach

26:22

for Radio Disney and

26:24

um, a couple of sorry

26:27

continuing, and we have talked about Radio Disney for a second,

26:29

Okay, I mean it was like put on by Radio

26:31

Disney. I wasn't exactly like a Radio Disney

26:33

artist, you know, but there

26:35

were there was this couple who

26:38

were managers who worked

26:40

for Radio Disney who liked

26:43

me, and we're like, I think I was like twelve or thirteen

26:45

at the time, and they wanted to help me

26:47

with my career. And so from that day

26:49

forward, I had managers and I had,

26:52

um, you know, gone to different music conferences

26:54

and sang acapella for people and

26:57

trying to get record deals. And by

26:59

fifteen I had my first record deal

27:01

with Drive Through Records and yeah,

27:04

and I was on there for a year. Didn't

27:07

work out because I was

27:09

writing pop punk songs and they wanted like

27:12

really obscure indie music. Um,

27:15

and so I just got off that and then just

27:17

kept kept that process, basically going,

27:20

oh my goodness. So I worked for Radio Disney

27:22

for four years. Oh I

27:24

love Radio Disney, but I just I

27:27

feel like I didn't quite make

27:29

it fully into the Radio Disney

27:32

realm. It was more of like these

27:34

managers worked for Ray Disney and then they left

27:36

Rady Disney to just be managers.

27:39

I see. So, but you've been in it

27:41

for a long time. Yeah,

27:45

I relate to that. I've been. I started. My first

27:47

interview was when I was thirteen. Oh

27:49

my god, that's amazing. So

27:52

I've been Yeah, five and a

27:54

half years. I've been working and I've loved

27:57

every second of it. But it's really interesting.

27:59

I'm sure you can really late like when you're working at

28:01

it at a young age, I always gravitated

28:03

towards people that were older than me, and I had trouble

28:06

kind of finding my group with people that were

28:08

my own age because I was always focusing on

28:11

my career and like what's next.

28:14

You said you were touring eighteen. Do you think you missed

28:17

out on anything? Or are you

28:19

like me? And that's just kind of the path that we

28:21

were given, and you were kind of like mentally older

28:23

than the age you always were. Yeah, I

28:26

agree, that's I The

28:30

more I talked to my friends who went to college and

28:32

stuff, the more I felt.

28:34

I feel like I

28:37

I got some insane life

28:39

experience very quickly

28:42

at a very young age that you

28:44

know. And I'm not saying college is bad. I

28:46

think it's great. Um, it's

28:48

different for everybody. It's different for everybody,

28:51

though not everyone is meant to go. Yeah,

28:53

and I and it's always there. I got my high school

28:55

diplolmost I could always go back. But um,

28:58

but yeah, I definitely feel like it

29:00

was the right path for me. It was I all

29:03

I wanted was to get on the road, and I

29:06

my parents were really supportive. I

29:08

mean my mom was the most supportive. And

29:11

um, I just had this opportunity

29:13

staring me in the face and it

29:15

wasn't even a question. I was like, I'm not going

29:18

to college when I've got a follow up boy

29:20

tour to go on, Like I'm

29:22

going to do that and think

29:24

about school later. But I was in

29:26

a very rare position where I had a record

29:28

deal and I had big tours lined

29:31

up, Like I totally get the

29:33

the sort of um conflicting

29:36

feelings of do I go to school or do I pursue this

29:38

when there isn't a deal

29:40

and there aren't tours already lined up and stuff,

29:42

So I do I do. See how unique

29:44

my experience was. And

29:47

then the Voice came along. Okay,

29:49

a few questions, how is that? How

29:51

do you deal with that kind of pressure on live

29:53

TV? People literally

29:56

voting to determine your fate,

29:59

Because when you think of it like that, it's really

30:01

weird. It is. And and and you

30:03

know, I came off the road touring

30:07

and competition was not in

30:09

my vocabulary. I've never been

30:11

competitive as far as my

30:14

music goes. Maybe when I was a kid and like

30:17

before i'd like matured, I'd be like,

30:19

that doesn't count. Yeah, I want

30:21

to beat here and whatever. I want to be the best karaoke

30:23

singer. I don't know, but I but in

30:26

my adulthood going on tour

30:28

and being being on tour with your

30:30

friends, it's like a party. It's so much

30:32

fun and it's not competitive. You go up and you

30:35

sing during each other's sets, and you

30:37

sleep on each other's buses, have sleepovers,

30:40

and it's just really fun and not competitive

30:42

at all. So going into the Voice was

30:45

terrifying, and I could see

30:47

how other people were super competitive,

30:49

and they were walking up and down the halls

30:52

doing their crazy runs and stuff

30:54

just to kind of intimidate each

30:56

other. And and the pressure

30:58

was so stide, like, oh

31:00

yeah, since the voice. I

31:04

I have a hard time with live television. To be completely

31:06

honest, I I do it

31:08

and I think I do a great job, but inside

31:11

I am a complete and total

31:13

mess. I am a mess. I

31:17

remember when it was like when

31:19

they were like about to announce, like who

31:21

is the winner? And I remember I

31:23

was like me and my brother were like a boat to there, like, oh

31:25

my god, what's what's gonna like they build

31:28

it up and Carson was like it

31:30

was just I was like, just say it already. And I know

31:32

they do that on purpose, but like, what is it like

31:34

actually being there? And then you're like,

31:36

I don't my goodness, Yeah

31:39

did it feel like hours? It did? It felt

31:41

so long, and it was like I

31:45

didn't feel like I had it in the bag at

31:47

all. Because Terry McDermott, who was

31:49

the runner up, he he just like

31:51

stole everybody's heart and I loved

31:53

him so much. He's he's a great

31:55

guy and Scottish and sings

31:58

eighties classic songs like What's not to Love?

32:00

You Know, has a cute little family,

32:04

and I just I just was like, I

32:06

almost at that point, was like, I hope he

32:08

wins, because I really well,

32:11

I thought that he had the better voice,

32:13

and I thought that he deserved

32:16

it more or something because he's

32:18

been in the industry way longer, and like,

32:21

I don't know, I just I'm a self

32:23

sabotage person. So I was like,

32:26

yeah, give it to him, and um,

32:28

so yeah, it was really really awful.

32:31

And now I

32:33

I watch it here and there, but I

32:36

have a hard time like keeping my heart right

32:38

down and and feeling

32:41

normal. Okay, Cassidy, we

32:43

have to take one final break, but when we come back,

32:45

let's talk a bit more about some of the crazy experiences

32:48

on the Voice. I also want to talk about

32:50

your own music and your perspective on social

32:52

media and so much more. We'll

32:54

be right back, and

33:03

we're back. I would say

33:05

after your season, only watched like one other season

33:07

because it was just too much for my anxiety. I

33:09

was like, I can't do this. By the way,

33:11

this is a side note, your outfit and your audition

33:14

was iconic. Ah where

33:18

was that blue dress from? And those red and those

33:20

red boots those I remember seeing that when

33:22

I was telling, I was like, I want that. Oh

33:24

my god. I couldn't believe they let me wear that.

33:26

I was like, here's the weird outfit

33:28

that I like. And I was great. And the dress

33:31

was I think from um Forever twenty

33:33

one, and then the shoes were,

33:36

Oh my god, I think Shoe Dazzle or one

33:38

of those like online shoes places.

33:40

I was super broke, so I the

33:43

dress I had in my closet for forever. The

33:45

shoes I remember like getting

33:48

them and like calling whatever the

33:50

company was to cancel my membership because I couldn't

33:52

afford another month of it. And they kept

33:54

me on the phone for an hour and we're like,

33:57

are you sure you want to kid? I'm like, I just I

33:59

broke, can't afford this. I just I

34:01

can't afford this. I just wanted these pairs of shoes.

34:04

Yeah, And so it was kind of hilarious

34:07

that that those that was the outfit that I

34:09

wore to audition for the point. Do

34:11

you still have the dress and the shoes? Yeah, oh

34:14

yeah, I've kept it all good

34:17

as you should. And that audition

34:19

song, What was it like getting the four chair turn?

34:22

Because how do you keep singing during

34:24

that? I know, I know

34:26

we're going back memory lane, but why not? No,

34:29

It's it's a good question because it is

34:31

actually something that the producers

34:33

talked to all of us about before the blind

34:35

auditions. They were like, we understand

34:38

the pressure and anxiety, and if you have a chair

34:40

turn, we understand like the relief you're going to feel.

34:43

But if you stop singing and you like dropped

34:45

the floor, you drop your mic, whatever, and you just get

34:47

so excited that you made it through, We're

34:49

probably not going to air your audition because that's

34:52

that's not going to be good TV to like

34:54

see somebody just oh, I got a chair turn, I'm

34:56

gonna stop singing. So that was

34:58

motivation for me because like I did

35:00

not for the I did not for

35:02

one second think I was going to win this show.

35:05

So I was like, I got to make sure they air my blind

35:07

audition because I'm not gonna

35:09

last very long and I just need all the exposure I

35:11

can get. So that's what

35:13

I was thinking. When they turned, I was like, you gotta keep singing,

35:16

you gotta get this to be aired. I don't

35:18

know how you do that, Like that's something so

35:20

incredible, and you have all these like incredible,

35:22

like iconic artists. That's you really

35:24

think about the whole show. It's so intimidating.

35:27

It is the most intimidating

35:29

part is when their backs are turned to

35:32

you. And then once they're turned around

35:34

and you see them interacting and like reacting

35:37

to your your voice, then it's easier.

35:39

Like I've never sung to people's backs

35:42

before, so it was weird. Yeah,

35:44

it's it's a weird power dynamic too.

35:47

Yeah, I will say maybe this is

35:49

controversial. I don't know, but I think your season was

35:52

probably one of the best seasons of the Voice Thanks.

35:55

It was so new, it was still

35:57

like it didn't feel like repetitive.

35:59

It was so fresh. It wasn't people trying.

36:01

It was just people who loved music, and

36:04

everybody had a different vibe. Like

36:06

I remember looking around and being like, I

36:09

don't know who's gonna win because we're also different from

36:11

each other, and that's that's what was special.

36:13

And then they would have us all singing together for these numbers

36:15

and it was like amazing because

36:17

we all just sounded different but harmonized

36:20

with each other. And it was. It was

36:22

a really special season. Yeah, and then

36:24

you released Wasting All These Tears, which I remember

36:26

seeing that music video like

36:29

because I was in middle school. I told you I

36:32

I followed you for a minute and I was remember

36:34

being in middle school. That's amazing remember

36:36

seeing that video and I was like,

36:39

whoa, this girl went off. Well.

36:43

I one of my like

36:46

dreams as a kid when

36:48

I would like envision a career

36:50

in music was like I get to be

36:53

I get to act in music videos, like

36:55

my own songs. Like I'm not an

36:57

actress, but I get to like play one

37:00

for like a day with the dresses

37:02

and the lights and the whole vibe.

37:05

That is one of my favorite parts of what I do, too,

37:07

is is being in music videos and getting

37:09

to like live out my childhood dreams.

37:12

Absolutely. That one was definitely

37:14

one of my favorites of just the

37:17

there were so many different setups. It was like, you

37:19

know, full day. It was so extra

37:21

in the best way. Yeah, And and like

37:23

the indoor swing with the with the rain was

37:26

just crazy. I couldn't believe

37:28

that they figured that out, and I just felt

37:30

like this isn't this is a major

37:32

label video shoot? Cool? Was

37:35

that the moment where you felt like you made it

37:37

or whatever whatever it quote made it means? Have

37:39

you ever felt that or do you still feel like you're working

37:41

on that? I still feel like I'm working on that. Yeah,

37:44

really, Yeah, I've

37:46

got a Grammy nomination. Girl. I am

37:49

so I am. I'm proud of the

37:51

things that I've accomplished. I am

37:53

grateful, But I

37:56

don't you know you're capable of more. I

37:59

know I'm capable of And I also don't really

38:01

know the I

38:03

don't have the thing that

38:05

I that. Once that happens, I'm I'm good.

38:07

I feel like I've made it. I mean, a big

38:09

bucket list moment is to host

38:11

and be musical guest on SNL. But

38:14

manifest, let's manifest Cassidy out

38:17

there. I I it would be the

38:20

coolest thing. Um, but I

38:22

don't even then I'd be like, Okay, what's next?

38:25

Like that was so awesome, I'm so happy? What

38:27

else can I do? Maybe if I played

38:30

a stadium and I sold it out

38:32

and I headlined, maybe that would be

38:34

like, oh, I made it, Because that's

38:36

to me, the most tangible

38:39

success that you could have is is

38:41

like people coming out to see you play

38:44

and that many people. So maybe

38:46

maybe that maybe like a stadium tour would

38:48

be like here we go, I'm good. I

38:50

totally agree with that, and I totally understand that because

38:53

you always want to work towards something

38:55

better. But then I go because I struggle

38:57

with him like okay, but then in my

38:59

focus sing on what's to come? Or am I

39:01

just not living in the moment, which is a

39:03

really hard balance to do. Yeah,

39:06

what advice do you have for me? Or you still going through that

39:08

yourself? No, I it's

39:11

a it's a journey. It's a journey, and I think I think

39:13

everything is different, you know. I think like if

39:15

you feel like a big weight

39:17

it's been lifted and you've accomplished

39:19

something and you want to sit in that for a minute,

39:21

like, I think you should listen to that

39:24

instinct and sit in it and and celebrate.

39:27

And then I think, too, if there's like our gut

39:29

tells us so much. So if you feel, oh

39:31

yeah, if you feel like okay, great,

39:33

I did that, But is

39:36

it enough to really like take a few

39:38

days off to just enjoy it um

39:40

or can I enjoy it? Because while simultaneously

39:43

continuing to work forward.

39:46

That's usually where I land, it's like, Okay, I

39:48

can I can enjoy this and celebrate while

39:50

staying productive. We're also we're

39:53

in a world where social

39:55

media everything is defined and you're

39:57

defined by that outward success of what other

39:59

people say of your projects. But the end of the day,

40:02

it just matters how you feel about it and if you're

40:04

proud of it. That's so much easier said

40:06

than done. But what has it been like because

40:09

social media when you were like on the Voice

40:11

was not nearly as prevalent as it is now,

40:14

and it's I've struggled with a

40:16

very uh toxic relationship with social

40:18

media because it's so

40:20

easy to compare yourself to people, how

40:22

many followers you have, all this and that, um,

40:26

And that's what a big part of the music business has

40:28

become about how many followers you have. How

40:30

have you dealt with navigating that when you're

40:33

just an artist and you care about the art. I've

40:36

um over the past year and a half really

40:39

paid attention to what sets

40:41

me apart instead of how

40:44

can I be as popular as this

40:46

person? I love that mindset, Yeah,

40:49

because because I'm not, I

40:51

don't I love I think it's beautiful when women

40:53

show their bodies I think it's amazing

40:55

when men show their bodies. I think it's like you're

40:58

you know, you have agency over your body what you

41:00

do with it. So I have no problem with that. I

41:03

personally don't feel comfortable. I don't

41:05

want to say ever, because I might tomorrow I'll be like,

41:07

you know what fun I'm gonna wear a bathing suit on Instagram,

41:10

but as of late, I

41:12

don't. I'm not a

41:14

bikini selfie poster.

41:17

I feel that, and I

41:20

think it's great when people do it,

41:22

but I do see that gets

41:24

way more engagement than anything I post.

41:27

But then I'm like, well, you

41:30

know, people want to look

41:32

at that kind of stuff. Maybe

41:35

there's more people that want to look at

41:38

women that look amazing in a bathing

41:40

suit, are comfortable enough to show

41:42

their bodies more than seeing

41:45

me play like turning my chemical

41:48

romance song into a country song acoustic.

41:50

You know, I don't know what

41:53

the mainstream audience wants, but

41:55

I can't focus on that. You can't focus

41:57

on that because social media, like

42:00

as big as it is, it doesn't

42:02

account for everybody in the world. It doesn't

42:05

and it doesn't define your success or your talent.

42:07

How many likes you have yeah, exactly.

42:10

So I I've I

42:12

see it. I pay attention to it. Sometimes it gets

42:14

to me, but most of the time, I'll

42:17

like be like, I'm want to look at my

42:20

feed and just see how it looks. And I'm

42:22

like, that looks like me. That looks like me. I'm

42:24

a I'm goofy. I'm an artist.

42:27

I I am a musician. I

42:29

love my dogs, I love my boyfriend, I love

42:31

my family, I love my friends. That's what you're

42:33

getting on my page, You're not. I don't.

42:36

Sometimes I'm like, I love my makeup today.

42:38

I opposed to selfie as you should. That's

42:41

completely self indulgent. And I lean into

42:43

that when I feel like it, you know, But my

42:45

page looks like me, and that's I

42:48

have to I do intentionally, Like

42:51

I have to stick with that, you know, because of the pressure.

42:54

Oh absolutely. And I think something I'm

42:56

realizing as I'm getting older, being a

42:58

girl, being a young woman, being a woman, it's

43:01

so hard. Yeah,

43:04

you have the interesting perspective of like

43:07

country music that's such a male dominated

43:09

industry where so much of the songs

43:12

are so sexist. What

43:15

was that like being a woman in that industry

43:17

and what was the biggest thing you've learned

43:19

about someone you don't want

43:21

to be and who you want to be moving forward. I

43:24

think like aligning

43:26

myself with there are people in Nashville

43:28

that are like minded and like agree with a

43:31

lot of the things. You know, Oh, of course it's

43:33

not everybody, it's not everybody. So I've

43:35

just aligned with the people that I

43:37

know are are

43:39

working for change, and they're advocating

43:41

for artists of color,

43:44

at anybody of color in the country

43:46

realm. Like, there's so many producers and songwriters

43:48

that just don't get the time of day.

43:50

So like just just aligning

43:53

with those initiatives,

43:55

aligning with those people that really want to make

43:57

that happen. Um no,

44:00

and when to speak up and when to step back,

44:02

you know, all that stuff. But like, I

44:05

think the thing that I've struggled

44:07

with more than you know, the

44:09

dudes that sing the songs that

44:11

objectify women, really

44:14

was mainly just like my experience

44:16

with a country label, because

44:19

there is this pressure put

44:22

on you to be digestible,

44:24

to be um cute,

44:26

um, you know, don't like roll

44:29

off the plane at six am after

44:31

you went on at four five am flight,

44:33

roll into the radio station without

44:35

makeup, on, like you better get ready in that airport

44:38

bathroom, have the blonde

44:40

hair with the extensions. Yeah,

44:43

yeah, all of that, Like just you know, don't

44:46

don't show your tattoos all the time, like

44:48

cover them up sometimes. I remember

44:50

one, like one promo shot,

44:52

I caught them editing

44:55

out my tattoo on my arm and I was like,

44:58

what are you gonna how are how are you gonna explain it when

45:00

I go to people in person and they see a tattoo and not

45:02

in the picture. And also like I remember

45:04

that too from your audition, Like it was like very distinctive.

45:07

It's not like a little like little whatever,

45:09

you know, it's it's what is it by the

45:12

way? Um? Well, and and it's

45:14

hand tattoo too, like you can't cover

45:16

that. But yeah, it's all music

45:18

related. There's like it's harder show I guess.

45:20

Um there's a bird singing, which was my first

45:22

tattoo. That was my first one the day

45:25

after I turned eighteen. Um,

45:27

this one is the This is from the

45:29

follow up boy tour I was on where like when on on

45:31

like a world tour for a year basically

45:34

eighteen which was amazing.

45:37

Um. And then this is from my great Grandpa.

45:40

I would call him pappy, but when I was too

45:42

young to pronounce it, i'd call him happy

45:45

and Hey Monday. Well

45:47

before we were Hey Monday, we were Blake Um

45:50

Blake showcase for Columbia

45:52

Records on my pappy's birthday

45:55

and he had passed at that point, but we got

45:57

signed, so I was like, oh, he's looking out for me,

45:59

so like a happy face. That's Blake

46:02

and you had Blake Shelton. I

46:04

know it wasn't that weird. Blake's my middle

46:06

name, so wait what, I

46:08

know it's like a cosmic thing.

46:11

If you have a kid, you should name it Blake, just to make

46:13

it even more full circle. No,

46:17

I know that would be that would make

46:19

sense. Passity,

46:22

thank you so much for coming on my podcast. I know

46:24

you're so busy. I know you're writing, I

46:26

know you're doing, but this conversation just

46:28

means so much. Thank you. Thanks

46:31

for having me and like being down to talk

46:33

about some some deep stuff. It was awesome.

46:35

I'm like, you're so wise for your age, Like I am

46:38

still blown away that you're what are you

46:40

eighteen nineteen? Just for nineteen?

46:42

Oh my gosh, Yeah, You're gonna be just fine.

46:46

Thank you so much, Cassidy again for coming on this

46:48

week's episode of Let's Be Real Podcast.

46:50

I hope you guys enjoyed it. Subscribe to

46:52

the podcast if you haven't already, and follow me on Instagram

46:55

and it's Sammy J. That's I T S

46:57

S A M M Y J A y E. I

47:00

love hearing your comments. DM me always

47:02

if you have any questions or if you just want

47:04

to chat. My d m s are open and I

47:06

will see you guys next week with another

47:08

very special episode. Bye guys. Yeah