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Welcome back to Lobow's Spark podcast

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, a podcast centering

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around ADHD and all neurodivergent

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people . My name is Lobow and welcome

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to season 11 . This

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season is going to be different . I am

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going to throw so many ideas

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and topics into this season

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that I hope you can keep up

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, because it's going to be the most

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ADHD fucking thing you've ever

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seen . And , speaking of ADHD , this

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episode is a solo episode Me

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just talking to you one on one because

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, honestly , I made a huge mistake

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in technology , which

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is why there's not a guest on with me , but

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I made a promise to you that I am back

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once a week there

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will be a podcast . So this

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is what we're going to do we're going to flip this where you turn

0:54

this into a positive , and I'm going to explain

0:56

to you what the fuck happened . So

1:00

I spoke with one of my best friends and

1:04

this season is going to be all about I'm

1:07

going to alternate best

1:09

friend , new

1:11

guest , best friend new

1:14

guest , so on , so forth Because

1:17

my goal is to prove that

1:20

support and love for one

1:22

another is ultimately more

1:25

important than anything else . And

1:27

I know that's cliche and everyone's going to say oh

1:29

, everyone says that , yeah , everyone

1:31

says it , but no one actually

1:33

fucking does it . We

1:37

are here to do

1:39

that . Whether

1:42

it's the Friday night get togethers , whether it's the

1:44

you know constant , constant

1:46

check ins with each other that

1:49

nobody sees . This

1:51

is what we do here . So

1:54

, unless you give a genuine fuck about that other

1:56

person , get the fuck on . If

1:59

you're here only for yourself , get

2:01

the fuck on . But

2:03

I highly doubt a lot of people

2:05

with ADHD are only here for themselves

2:08

. It may appear that way because

2:10

we are absolutely insane in our

2:12

methods . Right , and

2:14

our methods can appear so

2:17

conceited it's

2:19

. Look at me , look at me , look at me , look at me . That

2:23

is not our intent . Adhd

2:26

is the ultimate story of

2:28

intent versus

2:31

action . It

2:34

was not my intent to insult

2:36

you , but I did . It

2:38

wasn't my intent to appear

2:40

like I'm better

2:43

than you , but I did . It

2:49

is my intent , and

2:51

I think a lot of other people with ADHD

2:53

are like this . It

2:55

is our intent to

2:58

promote love , but we are over

3:00

the top , aggressively loving , and

3:04

if that is our worst characteristic , so

3:08

fucking be it . So back to

3:10

the story . Squirrel moment of the

3:12

day . I'm going back to my roots

3:14

here . Going back to my roots , squirrel moment of the day . So

3:17

did a podcast again with one of my

3:19

best friends and

3:21

it couldn't have gone better . It

3:23

was the most eye-opening discussion

3:26

I've had in a long time and a couple days

3:28

later , when I go to offload it , my

3:30

computer won't start and

3:33

I don't upload things to the cloud because , let's

3:37

be honest , does anyone trust the fucking cloud

3:39

? What is that

3:41

? What the fuck is the cloud ? Is

3:43

that something up in space that just

3:46

harnesses all your fucking information

3:48

? Yeah , no , I'm going to record it local and if it dies

3:50

, it dies . That's

3:53

just me . I mean . Honestly , if you're ADHD

3:55

, how many fucking flash drives do

3:57

you have ? Constantly , it's

4:00

like , oh , I'll record this , this flash drive , and then

4:02

this , and then then you've got the thing with your

4:04

significant other that you really

4:06

don't want people to see . Yet , come on , I

4:09

get it , I get

4:11

it . So , yeah , so I didn't record the fucking

4:14

cloud , but

4:17

that was detrimental because

4:20

I have taken a break for months

4:22

from this and it

4:24

has been therapeutic and awesome . And

4:28

then I wanted so bad to

4:31

come back spark

4:33

fire , all this kind of shit

4:35

. Like I usually am right , and

4:38

the first episode

4:40

was with another one of my close friends

4:42

up for the challenge , and

4:45

I felt like shit that day I felt

4:47

terrible Mentally

4:49

. I was not there . Up for the challenge

4:51

Said we

4:54

need to show both sides , and

4:57

that really resonated with me , so

4:59

I forced myself to

5:02

do it . I'm not proud of the episode

5:04

. My voice was gone

5:06

like it was awful . But

5:09

he carried me through that . He

5:12

was the one that did the introductions . He was

5:14

the one that did the recognitions . All I had to

5:16

do was show up . If everyone

5:18

with ADHD had a friend

5:21

that would show the fuck up every time

5:23

they needed them , how

5:27

difficult would this be ? You

5:30

are always going to have the executive dysfunction

5:32

. You are always going to have these issues

5:35

that plague you . You're always going to have , on

5:38

days off , days , depression , all

5:40

of this . You're going to have that

5:43

. But what if someone

5:45

that cared about you so much said

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just show up and I'll

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handle the rest , because

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ADHD is the biggest issue . Showing

5:55

up . So

5:57

help them do it , encourage

6:00

them to show up and let them

6:03

know that you've got their fucking back and

6:05

I guarantee you . I

6:08

can't say that this is social media . I

6:10

can't say guarantee , but what I can say

6:12

is that will be massively beneficial

6:14

for that person . Just

6:18

show up , I

6:20

got you . These

6:22

squirrel tanges are fucking amazing . We're going

6:24

back and forth and back and forth . Welcome

6:26

to the ADHD podcast . This is what it is . This

6:29

is the disorder and the advantage

6:31

, if you choose to see it that way . So

6:34

the computer doesn't start at

6:37

all . But I know I have another Zoom

6:39

call with a friend that needs me later

6:41

. So I get the backup computer

6:43

right . And the backup computer let me

6:45

be very clear is awesome

6:48

. It's way better than the primary . It's just the

6:50

primary has all my files stored . It's

6:52

got that desktop screen that every

6:54

ADHD person has with like 100,000

6:56

files , but you know exactly where

6:59

they are . Yeah , that was my primary

7:01

. My backup is actually quite organized , which

7:03

is a disaster

7:05

for me . So

7:09

, anyways , I

7:11

get

7:14

the new computer , I get the backup

7:17

set up and

7:19

my keyboard is missing the

7:22

six key . The

7:26

password to log into my computer needs

7:29

a six . And , by the

7:31

way , you're really going to love the

7:33

shorts on this because I'm doing TikToks

7:36

, I'm going to do all these things on

7:38

just how much effort

7:40

it took for me to be

7:42

there for a friend that I knew

7:44

needed me and

7:48

, honestly , all of those short little clips

7:50

. You're going to see why this was such an issue

7:52

, but to me

7:54

, it wasn't To

7:56

me , it was one computer failed

7:58

, fuck it . Backup plan , backup

8:00

plan . Backup plan because

8:03

someone needs me , because

8:05

when someone needs someone

8:08

else with ADHD , we

8:10

get that sense of pride right . We get that sense of belonging

8:13

that

8:15

can carry us for a long time . But

8:19

it's got to be reciprocal . So think

8:21

about this how

8:23

frustrated do you get with

8:25

your ADHD loved one or your ADHD

8:28

friend ? They talk too fast , they're

8:31

sporadic , they don't

8:33

make any sense a lot of the times , and

8:35

then you just kind of shrug it off and you're like , oh

8:38

, it's just them being them . Well , yeah , but

8:41

then how many times do you go to

8:44

that ADHD person when

8:47

it really fucking matters , when

8:51

it's I need someone that is going to love me

8:53

unconditionally , that is going to sacrifice

8:56

their time for me because they believe

8:58

in me , genuine believe in

9:00

me ? That's

9:03

the ADHD person . We

9:06

don't know any other way . But

9:08

all or nothing . Now , granted , if we don't like you

9:10

, then you

9:13

are the worst human in the world . But

9:16

if we love you , we

9:19

will go to the ends of this planet

9:22

for you and

9:25

we will show up day

9:27

after day after

9:29

day to check in with you . To

9:33

me that's an advantage because

9:35

at the end of life and I'm

9:37

getting jacked up again because this is my whole premise

9:39

At the end of life

9:41

, what ultimately matters ? What

9:44

ultimately matters the

9:48

fact that you Did

9:51

well in school ? If

9:54

you have ADHD , the

9:56

way you do things is not wrong , it

9:59

is different . Oh

10:04

man , that's so good to be back . Number

10:08

one thesis on this for me Can

10:12

you name a single person that

10:14

changed this world for the better ? That

10:17

was normal . Probably

10:20

not . Probably

10:22

not . Next week , next Monday

10:25

at 1 PM . I promise you I

10:27

will have my computer fixed , have

10:30

one of my best friends on and you will

10:33

really enjoy that , but

10:35

for now it's

10:37

just Lo bowel talking to you . It's

10:39

just Lo bowel talking to you . And

10:42

God damn , does this give me energy ? I

10:49

learned a lot in the two years I've been

10:51

doing this , and what I've

10:53

learned is that numbers don't

10:55

matter . People

10:57

do . However

10:59

, by

11:02

gaining numbers , you gain more people

11:04

. The problem is , I don't give a fuck about

11:06

that . I want personal interaction

11:09

, one on one , because I know that you're

11:11

struggling and I know that you're down and I know

11:13

that this world is cruel , but

11:15

, good God , can

11:17

you affect it for the better if

11:21

you have

11:23

support from people

11:25

that love you . That's

11:29

everything and that is the premise of

11:32

this season , new

11:59

category . I would also like to thank

12:01

the nine

12:03

anonymous donors

12:06

to this podcast . Thank you so much for

12:08

your support . All of you

12:10

, that means everything

12:12

and , honestly , it's

12:15

the premise of every season . But

12:18

now more than ever , if

12:20

you have ADHD or any neurodivergence

12:23

, I love you . I

12:25

am here for you . I am back

12:27

despite my technical disabilities . I

12:31

will see you next Monday at 1pm . I

12:33

got your back . Let's go , let's go

12:35

. My

12:37

story with resilience is

12:40

literally

12:43

this podcast

12:45

and doing this right

12:47

now , because

12:49

I feel like I have pushed

12:51

myself to the maximum amount

12:54

of effort to

12:56

get to know

12:58

each one of you on a personal level

13:00

and really try to

13:02

just be a shoulder

13:04

cry on or someone that can

13:09

say , pump you up for five seconds or whatever

13:11

it is that

13:14

takes us toll after a while . That's ADHD

13:17

.

13:17

That's what you care about and you're not

13:20

going to stop caring about it . You're not

13:22

going to let anybody get in the way

13:24

of it , and the world is better

13:26

because you're here , and

13:29

this group is better . There

13:32

are a lot of people that

13:34

deserve to have

13:36

you and

13:39

deserve the spaces that you've created . So

13:45

thank you , thank you for creating all

13:47

these spaces .

13:50

You're the welcome . I like this . Conclusions

13:52

I like doing it this way . Thank

13:54

you , kirk , very much , by the way , for that . It

13:57

is nice to have someone

13:59

else . My whole promotion

14:01

is like care about the person , love

14:03

the person with everything you have . But when it's

14:05

not quite as intense

14:08

and someone says something else about you that

14:10

is a part of this group or that is

14:12

a friend of yours , that matters , and so

14:14

, like you know , all these characteristics

14:16

that we get so frustrated with

14:19

, they're also

14:21

the same characteristics that bring us together

14:23

, and

14:26

I wouldn't trade that for anything

14:28

personally

14:30

.

14:31

And I agree with everything everyone said about

14:33

each other too Fun fact

14:36

, I do an affirmation for

14:38

myself every day no shit

14:41

.

14:41

No matter if it's a few

14:43

words like I am Blushing

14:45

Crafter and I am really

14:48

awesome Can be one of them . If I can't figure

14:50

anything out specifically , I

14:52

will tell me self that Every

14:55

day .

14:56

I love that . I love that , that's fantastic

14:58

.

14:59

I need to say something . One of the things that

15:01

I wrote down that I hate about having

15:03

ADHD is that I feel like I don't fit

15:05

anywhere . But I need to say this I

15:07

do feel like I fit in here and

15:10

probably that's because we all have ADHD

15:12

. We all see the world through the same lenses , even

15:14

though we still have our differences

15:17

. But and I want to think

15:19

low about because , like seriously

15:21

, I could say beautiful things about

15:23

everyone here , and it

15:25

is hard for me to say beautiful things about most

15:28

people because I think most people are stupid I'm

15:30

going to be honest and blunt , but

15:33

I do I do feel like I

15:35

fit in here and I do

15:37

fucking love what you did here , Lobow

15:39

. I struggled so much to find my drive

15:42

, like people call it , but I feel

15:44

like I found it here .

15:52

What is your profession ?