0:00

Lawfolk, we've got Beth and

0:02

Briggs Miller of Spectra of

0:04

the Sea podcast and E.R.E.

0:06

Essex podcast. Two

0:09

excellent supernatural podcasts. Would you

0:11

class yourself as a supernatural

0:13

podcast? Yeah, and general weirdness.

0:15

General weirdness. Yeah, anything that makes you go, eww.

0:19

Oh yeah. Fair enough. Like a

0:21

bite of a lime? Yeah, like a,

0:23

makes you go, eww. Eww. Eww.

0:27

The Mets, if you're from the 90s,

0:30

which I know I am. Oh, the Mets advert.

0:32

Well, the judder man. It

0:35

was him from, what's it called? Mighty

0:37

Boosh. Was it? Yeah. Do you remember

0:39

the early Mets advert, whereas hi, I'm

0:42

a freelance scientist. That was Julian Barrett

0:44

from Mighty Boosh. Oh my God, it

0:46

was as well. This was technically known

0:48

as a judder. I'm also a

0:50

massive fan of the show. So I am

0:52

fangirling so much right now. To

0:55

be a law person and actually sit

0:57

and think about the 90s

0:59

and misremember things. Yeah. You

1:02

could do it from the comfort of your own home,

1:04

but today you're doing it not live because this is

1:06

a recorded medium. We're very, very happy to have you

1:08

on Beth. And thanks very much. Thank

1:10

you for asking. And of course,

1:12

Christmas pig to you. Christmas pig to

1:14

you too. Happy Southern Alien. Very

1:18

nice. And also Christmas pig to everyone that

1:20

celebrates. And those that don't actually, you're just

1:22

going to get one. Christmas pig

1:24

to. Yeah. The bloomin' PC brigade

1:26

hasn't got to us yet. The

1:29

woke punch. Yeah. The

1:31

anti-Christmas pig woke brigade.

1:34

Yeah. Ruined it for everyone else. Yes.

1:36

But I think you've got a bunch of whoresigned

1:39

tails for us as it is the run up

1:41

to Christmas pig. Also, I'm not going to explain

1:43

why it's Christmas pig listener. You're going to have

1:45

to do your own research on that or I

1:48

might do it in the outro. If

1:50

you don't know by now, there's no hope. Basically,

1:53

at this time of year, our

1:55

thoughts turn to the porcine folklore.

1:57

Our piggy friends. I mean, there's loads

1:59

of pig. folklore at Christmas. So it's

2:01

quite natural that we would turn our

2:04

thoughts. To the pigs. To the sty.

2:06

Our minds are in the sty. Oh.

2:09

But you've kind of snuffled around, you could

2:11

say, and found a bunch of stories in

2:14

the rotting vegetation that is

2:16

the world or the or books.

2:19

The law of the land. Mm-hmm. Yeah. There

2:21

were some good offerings. Yeah, what did you

2:23

find? Well, I found some good ones. I found

2:25

them one. I know you particularly like this one. Mm-hmm.

2:28

All right. Let's kick off with The Spider in the Chimney.

2:30

The Spider in the Chimney. Neither of those things

2:32

are pigs. How are we going to get a

2:35

pig in here? Let's find out. You've

2:38

got to hold on and wait now, James, because you know,

2:40

there will be pig. You just got to wait, OK?

2:42

OK. I got

2:44

this story. It's a story I knew anyway because

2:46

we discussed it on Eerie Essex. But I

2:49

found a book that went into more

2:51

detail with this one. And this was

2:53

in Essex Ghosts by James Wentworth Day,

2:56

who could tell a tale. He almost

2:58

told Kenneth. JWD? JWD.

3:01

He knew how to spin a yarn. Nice.

3:04

So, as I said, this is about the

3:06

spider in the chimney. And in a village

3:08

called Stock, there's an inn called

3:10

The Bear, which... So, there was a

3:12

little character and he was known locally

3:14

as the spider. And he was a

3:16

little ossler who used to groom the horses. Wait,

3:19

wait, wait, wait, wait. Is this a human? This

3:22

is a natural spider. So, this is a little

3:25

flower. I don't even know what

3:27

an ossler is. An ossler, to me, sounds

3:29

like a large rodent. No, that

3:31

would have been even more fun. How many

3:33

animals can cram into this story? What is

3:35

an ossler? An ossler is someone who takes care of the

3:38

horses like an inn. Oh,

3:40

OK. Look what it says. Right. The ossle.

3:42

Ossle the horses. And I'm

3:44

going to guess he was called the spider because he

3:46

could groom loads of horses at the same time. It

3:48

was like he had eight arms. No.

3:51

OK, fine then. But we'll get to why he was

3:53

called the spider soon. Did he poo silk? He did.

3:56

OK, sorry. Spoiler alert. As

4:02

well as like looking after the horses and

4:04

making sure that they were fed and what

4:06

have you and sleeping in the stable loft,

4:09

he'd come into the pub and he would have some

4:11

party tricks and one of the party tricks was

4:13

the landlord said, if you can down this pint

4:16

without taking a breath, you'll get your next one

4:18

free. And I think his record was 14 pints.

4:21

Without a breath? I don't think he did the whole 14. I

4:23

think each one he drank without a breath.

4:25

And then when he got to the 14th

4:27

DA... I'll be all right now, actually, thanks.

4:29

That's all right. Yeah, I'm done. Someone

4:32

hold his nose, I guess. I'm just trying

4:35

to think of the logistics of how you'd

4:37

prove or disprove. So the sort of like

4:39

the rules around it. Whilst chugging. I hope

4:41

someone did. Otherwise, that would have been a

4:43

very easy 14th pint. But that wasn't the

4:46

only trick he did. So he also used

4:48

to take one of his pints and climb

4:50

up the chimney. Hence, spider. That's the thing

4:52

spiders are most famous for, being in chimneys.

4:55

Necking beers. If you

4:58

ever miss your pint, that's where it's gone. So

5:00

he used to go up there and he

5:02

would... There's a little shelf inside this fireplace.

5:05

And he would sit there with his pint and

5:08

often not want to come down because it was

5:10

cozy up there and it was cold outside. If

5:12

you're cold, they're cold. Bring them in. Spiders.

5:15

So these are shove a bunch of straw up

5:17

the chimney and set fire to it. So smoke

5:19

him out. We'll get to why they used to

5:21

do this later. Because there's a twist in this

5:24

tail. A twisted tail. Do you see what I

5:26

did there? Yeah, yeah, yeah. The puns are starting

5:28

to... That's good. That's good. And then

5:30

sometimes even that wouldn't do

5:32

it. And there was one Christmas Eve where

5:34

he was so full of beer, he wouldn't

5:36

even budge for the straw smoke. So they

5:38

rammed a bunch of sticks up the chimney

5:40

and set fire to them. And that actually

5:42

knocked him out. Oh, I was going to say.

5:45

And he died of smoke inhalation.

5:48

I Thought it might have been like the next

5:50

one would have been bricks. He had a real

5:52

sort of big bad wolf vibe. They Started with

5:54

straw. He really did, didn't they? Especially with the...

5:56

Moved on to burning sticks. Next One, they're going

5:58

to put some briquettes, maybe a charcoal. Cobra Cat

6:01

I mean. The know Christmas he is

6:03

that Sanchez entrance man. They're playing with

6:05

fire has. Literally and cigarettes is like

6:07

literally and figuratively. yes one gotten. So

6:10

he was up there. Any passed out

6:12

from smoke inhalation and died as you

6:14

do very easily. Done for girls and

6:17

talk years and millions I said Mrs

6:19

is Middle East and a going concern.

6:21

Is I think it's fi kills a minute smoke in

6:24

seconds. The. Seal that I was in

6:26

our tools in Millet. Sad when it

6:28

is scary at the smoke kills and

6:30

mountain warehouses. Know Dhabi, my says sisters

6:32

and. With a blast him at that in I

6:34

say couldn't figure out how to get him down. Your

6:37

they need the first point opportunities for a

6:39

bird. The chimneys caps the spider, but the

6:41

probably the bird would get stuck. Said agony

6:44

said the cats are presumably to transfer and

6:46

where he did die long. unsure of a

6:48

perhaps he died. he died in his Il

6:50

Nido. to be home and. Plenty we didn't

6:52

seem the same dispensing. Years later they did

6:54

try to see if they could get what

6:56

was less is him down pets. Are

6:59

we still? He was still

7:01

that James. He's still and

7:03

wafts, yes, sunni that stone.

7:05

This. Isn't they couldn't game down without

7:07

bringing down the chimney stat So they

7:09

districts of that sex and so he

7:12

still atla. Genuinely genuinely.

7:14

Announced you asked, what has this got

7:16

to do with pigs. Did they get to

7:18

the point of them for the better than the Caitlyn

7:20

the Dog mm forgot the rhyme and sticker Pick up

7:22

their know. How they

7:24

didn't see that now. but a little south they

7:26

used to like to sit. Same last, the bacon.

7:28

Smoker Oh so yeah. man, I forgot

7:30

that he was still there is quite

7:32

sad. but I do like the nursery

7:34

rhyme aspects that you have. the Big

7:36

Bad Wolf Factor and then you've got

7:38

six. or the Box, The Old Lady,

7:40

The Swallow bugs, Florida sealed doors. I've

7:43

got even more animals. Or you know,

7:45

where you want more animals? I've got

7:47

no answer to doubly day. When

7:49

steps to some of the people in

7:51

the pub to knew him all the

7:53

members him and they said authorities also

7:56

tax necessity accent he was sharp as

7:58

a fox. and is planning is a Wagging

8:00

load of weasels. Oh, oh, oh. Nice.

8:03

Sharp and cunning. That is both

8:05

sharp and cunning. And they said,

8:07

I reckon he's still there. And there he stops,

8:09

and we don't want to lose him. So it's

8:11

become sort of like an emblem of the pub.

8:14

And customers still say they see him dodging about.

8:16

And I love this. He has shrunk since

8:18

he's become a ghost. Mm-hmm. He's

8:21

also got a Gremlins vibe as well, hasn't

8:23

it? The Christmas and they're stuck up the

8:25

chimney. Do you think he was dressed as

8:27

Suntie? I know. He's got everything. It's, yeah,

8:29

it's... Well, I hope so. The text is

8:31

very rich. It's very rich. It

8:33

was rich, this text. Wow, that was great.

8:35

Thank you. I know you like that story. Would

8:38

you like more pigs? Yes, please. More

8:40

pigs at a faster rate. OK, OK.

8:42

So these are spectral pigs. Mm-hmm. These

8:44

are actual pigs now, not just bacon

8:46

fodder. These are actual

8:48

ghosts of pigs. This is from Haunted

8:50

East Anglia from Joan Forman. Oh, I know

8:52

her well. I have a Joan Forman. I think

8:55

I have one of those counties around there. I

8:57

think you've got Haunted East Anglia because

8:59

we talked about how the front cover

9:01

had this weird, creepy, spectral figure on it.

9:04

Yes, and it's the weeping willow. That's it.

9:06

Yes. Lovely stuff. Classic. A

9:08

classic of the genre. So again,

9:10

this is Christmas-based. Mm,

9:12

lovely. It's a Christmas pig's... It's

9:15

Christmas pigs' floral. Nice. So

9:17

hold on to your socks. A litter

9:19

of Christmas pigs. On a

9:21

Christmas morning, a local man was walking

9:23

from Corsorpe to the pub in Legborne

9:25

Village. As he drew level with the

9:27

plantation gateway, he heard the sound

9:29

of footsteps approaching. Feeling sociable,

9:32

he slowed down to enable the men to

9:34

catch up with him, thinking to have a

9:36

pleasant conversation. The steps came nearer, through level,

9:38

and then passed him, but there was no

9:40

person to be seen. Immediately followed a herd

9:43

of pigs. They

9:46

dashed past him and forced him off

9:48

the road. So there were some ghost,

9:50

presumably humans, and then some... The prize

9:52

pigs? Yeah, bonus pigs. Bonus pigs, yes.

9:55

Wow. Ghost humans and then

9:57

pretty hefty pigs. to

10:00

look around. There were no pigs in sight, so they were

10:02

ghost pigs too. Or vanishing pigs. Either

10:04

one is special. When he got to

10:07

the pub, he told his friend, who

10:09

far from laughing, cried, just stopped

10:11

and asked about the spot.

10:14

All he said was, aye, and then

10:16

went on to tell the story. When he

10:18

was ditching there, a lady in a car

10:21

stopped and asked about that spot, and she

10:23

said there was a stone nearby to commemorate

10:25

a murder. I'm trying

10:27

to guess whether it was by pigs or

10:29

of pigs. But carry

10:31

on. Well, he may be on for

10:33

something here. So hang on. Sometime in

10:35

the 1800s, a drover had taken his

10:37

stock to Lausmarket and come back with

10:39

a herd of pigs he'd bought and

10:41

a pocketful of money from the sale of

10:44

his own stock. Oh, wow. He's flipping... What

10:46

was he? What's a drover do? Past tense

10:48

of drive. I imagine. He's flipping livestock. But

10:50

somebody was lying waiting in the gateway. The gateway

10:53

where our guy had seen the ghost pigs. And

10:55

jumped out on him and cut his throat. Whoa!

10:57

Oh, no. Yeah, it's

10:59

got dark. Yeah. And the pigs witnessed all this,

11:01

I guess, and that's going to be quite harrowing.

11:04

And that's why they haunt the place still, trying to

11:06

search for their drover. Or the drover's murderer.

11:08

Maybe they're ghost slash invisible

11:11

pig detectives. Oh, I've watched

11:13

that. Even if they haven't made up their

11:15

mind in the pilot and it's still just

11:17

ghost or vanishing pig detectives. So

11:19

this stone? Yes. Don't go and look

11:22

for it. It's not there. Perfect. What

11:24

a proof if proof we need to

11:26

be. And now, what's taken away during the

11:28

Second World War where they widen the road? Probably

11:30

quite nearby. They just shifted it. So there is

11:32

the stone. Still don't go and look for it

11:34

because we don't know where. That is nicked your

11:37

tag on that. No, it's good. It

11:39

is stolen in itself, don't worry. It's a

11:41

reference that no one knows. Do you want

11:43

to hear about some Welsh pigs throwing shade?

11:45

Yes. So this is in an amazing

11:48

book. If you ever want to know about

11:50

Welsh folklore, it's by someone called Elias Owen.

11:52

He is actually just an essay,

11:54

but it's a book. Again,

11:58

this is a podcast you can't see. It is

12:00

a good shot worth and it's amazing.

12:02

It like go through everything about Welsh

12:05

folklore. He covers a section on pigs.

12:07

Yes. Lucky for us. So there was a

12:09

man called William Davis who wanted to get

12:11

home from his journey in England

12:13

before the end of the harvest. So he decided

12:15

he was going to try and get home as

12:17

quick as he can, but he was running late

12:19

which meant that he had to travel on

12:22

a Sunday. Now back in day.

12:24

No, no, no. Yeah. I

12:26

guess you turned into stone. Mm-hmm.

12:29

He said he dreaded meeting anyone on his

12:31

way to anyone who was on their way

12:34

to chapel and he felt guilty with

12:36

every step. Well, by Sunday evening,

12:38

he had reached a Flandvihandjal Crithan

12:40

where he was known. And so

12:42

he determined to wait until they

12:44

were all in mass. Good idea. Well, he

12:46

got to the village okay. But

12:48

when he got to a barley field,

12:50

he suddenly found himself surrounded by a

12:52

large number of pigs. Oh

12:54

no, the most pious of

12:56

all the farmyard animals, the

12:59

pig. Yeah. I like the

13:01

way they just like jumped at him. They

13:03

were waiting for him lying in wait. Imagine they've

13:05

like got cigarettes hanging out in their mouth and

13:07

like just ID playing with little flick knives in

13:09

their trotters. Yeah, it looks like you're a... Like

13:12

clicking. Looks like you're missing mass,

13:15

mister. What's he called? Mr.

13:18

Davis. Mr. Davis. We're running along to

13:20

church now pretty boy. Is

13:23

exactly how it went down. No, really. Well,

13:27

no, they came up to him, stared

13:29

at him, grunted and then walked

13:32

away. To be honest, I've seen pigs,

13:34

that's standard pig, M.O. Is it standard pig?

13:37

Well, then it went on and he met... Oh

13:39

no. Judging pigs. Judging pigs,

13:41

more judging pigs. No, gets

13:43

worse. Judging mice. This

13:45

is like a reverse Swaller the

13:47

Spider. Oh yeah. And even

13:50

more a tutting dog, the worst

13:52

of all dogs. Yeah. And

13:54

then your favorite kind of animal. Another pig,

13:56

a dolphin? No, I

13:59

don't think you'd meet a... dolphin in the whales.

14:01

Among the few. It's

14:03

saying my favorite animal. I'm just

14:06

running through my. They

14:08

sort of sound, it could sound like a

14:10

very like quick number of tuts, wouldn't it?

14:13

Okay. Yeah. Maybe that's

14:15

what the dolphins are doing. Just tutting at us all the

14:17

time. And we're like, Oh, look, they're playing. That

14:19

little grin on their faces. Yeah. Don't trust them.

14:22

It's not a grin. It's a grimace. Wait a

14:24

minute. So a dog did it as well. A

14:26

dog. Now there used to be that sort of

14:28

myth that dogs can't look up. I think that

14:30

was put about why the TV show spaced. I

14:34

do believe it was, um, Sean

14:36

of the dead. Was it Sean of the dead? And

14:39

I tried it with my dog. They can look up. Yeah.

14:41

And it turns out they can also look down on you.

14:44

Oh yeah. And touch. But

14:47

the next animal you're going to

14:49

absolutely love this. A headless horse. Oh,

14:53

of course a headless horse. What

14:55

happened there? Of course. Of course.

14:57

A headless horse. It's

14:59

a headless course. Of course. Well,

15:02

I don't know how a headless horse would

15:05

like look disapproving. I imagine it might just

15:07

like pull with him or turn around and

15:09

like, you know, really like swish his tail

15:11

sort of like in a, yeah, I can't

15:14

really. How do you throw shade if you

15:16

haven't got a head? I mean, anything you're

15:18

doing is it's tinged.

15:20

He's got an edge to it. If

15:22

you're a headless horse, but yeah, it's

15:24

very difficult to read emotions on anything,

15:27

I'd say that's headless. You can assume

15:29

terror and pain at the very least

15:31

a sense of on we. Do

15:33

you know what you said? It was like the

15:35

reverse of the, the, the nursery rhyme reverse. You

15:37

know, she ran. What's the last person he would

15:40

meet? The old woman. Yes. He met

15:42

an old woman who's had a mouth full of spiders.

15:44

Terrified. She was. I assumed

15:46

she had because she was sitting on the,

15:48

on the wall to the boundary to his

15:50

house, who was that close

15:52

to home and met your woman. Apparently the

15:54

headless horse. She was like, an

15:57

old woman, he'd just like collapsed. Did

16:00

he die of shame? I didn't die. Oh,

16:02

thank goodness. He was incapacitated by shame. I

16:07

think he was found by his parents who

16:09

were just like, you what? Instead

16:12

of like, they hadn't seen the sun for months

16:14

and they were like, you came here on a

16:16

Sunday? We did have another one, but then you

16:19

went and like dashed all my hopes because apparently

16:21

you've spoken about it before. Which one's

16:23

this? This is the Boar Head ceremony.

16:25

Oh, in Oxford, yes. Yep. Go

16:28

on. Go on, everyone. It's Christmas

16:30

Pig. Everyone, you like a story that you've

16:32

heard before at Christmas Pig? Well, yeah. I

16:34

mean, yeah, we like, you know, you tell the same

16:36

stories every year. That's part of it, isn't it? You

16:38

listen to your granddad or your grandma telling the same

16:41

story that they've told you a thousand times, but it's

16:43

still good. And it's not just because you don't

16:45

go back and listen to old episodes. This

16:47

is from a dictionary of British

16:49

folk customs by Christ in

16:51

a Hole. It's Christina Hole. So

16:53

there's this tradition that's actually carried

16:55

out across Britain. It's

16:57

since the Middle Ages, a boar's head

17:00

would be paraded and decorated and garlanded

17:02

with like high ceremony and then brought

17:04

into a hall of feasting to the

17:06

sound of trumpet, singing and poems and

17:08

a general palaver. I think it still

17:10

takes place even today. I mean, this

17:12

when Christina or Christ in a Hole,

17:14

Christina Hole wrote this book, it was

17:17

still being done at Queens College, Oxford.

17:20

And in the 19th century, most

17:22

students stayed at the college as winter journey home

17:24

was too dangerous. They just

17:27

stayed over, you know, and they said, let's let

17:29

you know, if they're staying here for Christmas, let's

17:31

make a bit of a thing of it. And

17:33

nothing says Christmas like turning off a pig's head

17:35

and bringing it inside, apparently. So

17:38

again, just like it is everywhere else, it's

17:40

brought to the high table while stopping every

17:42

so often to sing a verse from the

17:44

boar's head carol bite. And I love this

17:46

name. Winkin de Word. Oh, yes.

17:49

Winkin de Word. Yes. I remember

17:51

that. So he wrote like

17:53

sort of customs and songs around Britain

17:55

and was printed in 1521. It

17:59

was like the nam- hits of

18:01

15 now 1521. Now

18:03

that's what I call folk hymns. That's

18:06

what I call a boar's head. What

18:08

do you know? The reason they do

18:11

it in Queen's College, apart from entertaining

18:13

homesick students, was supposed to commemorate and

18:15

this bit I know you spoke about

18:17

was it with Tantral? I think it

18:20

may have been or it might have

18:22

been on the Cuthbert Shields episode, the

18:24

Return of Cuthbert Shields, because I think

18:26

he was at what he might have

18:29

been at Queen's College. Ah,

18:31

so that's fine. Right. We'll talk about

18:33

it again. So this was supposed

18:35

to commemorate a scholar from the college who

18:37

had met a wild boar on the heights

18:39

of shot over and being unarmed, apart from

18:41

a book, a copy of Aristotle, he just

18:44

went up to the pig and shoved it

18:46

down his throat crying, swallow this if you

18:48

can. Cool. As you do. Yeah. And

18:50

the boar replied, I'm going to just guess how it says.

18:55

Come on. And died. Wow.

18:57

That was a good, that was believable. Oh

19:00

yeah. I bet you thought you were there. I

19:02

thought I was measuring a boar

19:04

with a book. I don't know

19:06

what it said. I didn't quite understand that. Oh,

19:09

that was Griecomme S and it means

19:11

it is Greek. So this pig doesn't

19:13

like Greek food. Like it's all Greek

19:15

to me or something. It's all Greek to me. Yeah,

19:17

it does like foreign muck. One

19:20

of them. Very picky pig. I mean, to die is

19:22

a bit over the top. Yeah,

19:24

that's a bit much. Even old

19:26

Davis didn't die when a strange

19:28

lady scared him. Well, this actually

19:31

all, I mean, to bring Essex in, you know,

19:33

as I am one

19:35

half of Erie Essex and they also

19:37

took place in horn church. But Christina

19:39

says it was a bit more boisterous.

19:42

Oh, the boar's head ceremony or the murder of

19:44

a boar with a book. There is a murder

19:46

of a boar because how they did it. Well,

19:48

if there's a boar's head at some point, the

19:51

boar would have been murdered. Yes, I doubt it's

19:53

not still alive. The existence of the head implies

19:55

a body and it being attached.

19:57

Yeah. Well, they don't know what happened to the boy. I assume they

19:59

could. You'd hope so. Well, on

20:01

Christmas Day afternoons, the head would be paraded

20:04

on a pitchfork. You know, like, can

20:06

you see the tall guys going this way?

20:08

Yes, yes. They do it with umbrellas, not...

20:10

The boar's head's on a pitchfork. No, not

20:12

anymore. It's paraded

20:15

to a mill field near the church and

20:17

then people would wrestle for it. Oh. I

20:20

mean, that's how much people like the boar's head. Is

20:22

it the pearl or something like a bit inside the

20:24

cheek that's going to be the most delicious part of

20:26

a pig or something? I think so, but

20:29

my knowledge of that comes off like

20:32

Sans the Lambs. Oh, really? That's

20:35

where most of my knowledge comes from, horror

20:37

films. If it's most of your cookery, that's a

20:40

bad thing. Oh, yeah, no, not most of my

20:42

cookery, just random facts. Okay, good. Your

20:44

cooking tips don't come from noted cannibal.

20:47

Well, the winner and their friends would then

20:49

take the boar's head to the inn and

20:51

feast on it. At least everything

20:53

got used, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's nice.

20:55

But I imagine after being on a pitchfork for

20:57

a while, I mean, it's Christmas and it'd be cold,

21:00

but you know, it might be a bit musty

21:02

by the time you get it there. I think so.

21:04

And presumably, whoever's at the very least

21:06

worked up a sweat if not got covered in mud,

21:08

and they're going to be doing things, they're going to

21:10

be messing around with it. Yes, it's not exactly going

21:12

to be in a nice state by the time you

21:15

get to the party. I'm

21:17

no vegan or vegetarian, but I'm not

21:19

a fan of eating the face of

21:21

things. That's a really

21:23

good merch idea. I don't want to eat the face

21:25

of a thing. Not a fan

21:27

of the face of things. Well, yeah. Well,

21:30

this origin goes back even further,

21:32

apparently. And I

21:34

found online somewhere, I think actually

21:36

so embarrassing. I think I found this

21:38

on Wikipedia. That's absolutely fine.

21:41

Is it? Okay. So

21:43

this person, whoever put this on Wikipedia said it

21:45

was initiated in all probability by the

21:48

Anglo-Saxons. So it goes back

21:50

that far. And in Norse tradition, sacrifice

21:52

carried the intent of imploring Freya to

21:55

show favor to the new year. So

21:57

the boar's head with an apple in the mouth was carried to the

21:59

banquet hall. on golden silver dish, the sounds

22:01

of trumpets and sounds of minstrels. And

22:04

then they would inevitably fight. And

22:06

inevitably fight over it. But

22:08

yeah, I mean, it still happens a lot around, I mean,

22:10

there's a balls head ceremony in London every year, you

22:12

know, of all like the list of things, Christmas things

22:14

to do in London, it probably won't make that

22:16

list. But there is a ceremony which takes

22:18

place in early December, very early on

22:21

in Lord Mayor's office. And

22:23

then it goes from the worshipful company

22:25

of butchers to the hall and barfoam

22:27

you close by a cheap side. And yeah, it's

22:30

a big thing. I mean, I've got

22:32

pictures, I'll send them to you can do what you

22:34

will with them. But when's the next

22:36

one? I was gonna say it's December

22:38

tomorrow, James should go to the ball head.

22:40

Yeah, when is it? I don't know. Have

22:42

a look. Tickets is offering tickets. Ball's

22:45

head ceremony, London 2023 and lunch, February. Whoa,

22:50

what? The ball's headed 2022 looks

22:52

very 70s. It

22:55

does. I think it's a

22:57

really good match. I want because of health

22:59

and safety. Yeah, no, it's got like kiwis

23:01

and oranges and apples on a stick sticking

23:04

out the ears. Is it redheads with like

23:06

all white dots? Oh, you've got

23:08

another picture. That's worse than that, sir. The tusk

23:10

looks like it's made of marzipan or something. They've

23:12

got the apple in the mouth. I think that's

23:15

real. But they've sort of decorated. Oh, the one

23:17

I'm looking at is definitely not real. Yeah, the

23:19

one that they've got outside is like a toy,

23:22

like a weird child's toy. But

23:24

then there's another one and it's

23:26

sort of surrounded by crests. And

23:28

then it's got they've made an

23:30

eye out of what looks like

23:32

some marzipan and an olive or

23:34

grape. It's gross. Like,

23:37

I think there's radishes

23:39

on there as well. There's radish and kiwi

23:41

right next to each other. I think these

23:44

butchers know their meat. But not their fruit

23:46

and veg. Oh, how much do you

23:48

reckon a ticket is? 25 quid. Triple

23:50

it and add that. Oh, what is

23:52

it? 70 quid plus VAT per

23:54

person. I want the whole head for that. Yeah, yeah,

23:57

I'm looking at it, you know, all that

23:59

remains is for me to. say. Thank you very much,

24:01

Beth and Briggs Miller. Where can people

24:03

hear more of your stuff, presumably less

24:05

pig based? I don't actually

24:07

think we've spoken about any pigs. So you might. Oh,

24:09

no, I did. I did. I did. I spoke about

24:12

pigs on the road episode. And I think possibly in

24:14

the episode you were in when you came on January. It

24:17

was very animal animal. It was animal-ly, I

24:19

think. Yeah. It was my mum's favourite episode.

24:21

Really? Yes. How

24:24

come? Because of all the animals. She's a big

24:26

fan of the animals. She's a big fan of the

24:28

animals, yeah. And you made her laugh. Oh, oops.

24:30

What are the podcasts then? It's

24:33

Eerie Essex podcast. And you can

24:35

find it on all usual places,

24:37

sort of like iTunes, Amazon Music,

24:39

Spotify. And I do Eerie Essex

24:41

with Elsa Clarke, who's my bestie.

24:44

And I do Spectra the Sea with

24:46

Owen Staton, who has got the most

24:49

amazing voice in the world.

24:51

It is like Han puts us all to shame.

24:54

So that's an audio drama that follows

24:56

the folklore of the Welsh coastline. So

24:58

we like go along the Welsh coast

25:00

in a story of itself that tells

25:02

stories on the way. Oh, very nice.

25:04

It's like immersive and it's soundscape, so you feel

25:06

like you're with us. Very nice. Oh,

25:09

that sounds delightful. Thank you, Han. Now,

25:11

this is going to sound like a

25:13

backwards insult, but that I think would

25:15

very much appeal to the Snorfolk, because

25:17

that sounds like something you would want

25:19

to properly close your eyes and listen

25:21

to when you're nice and calm in

25:23

the dark. It has got a sort

25:25

of like meditative, like sort of well-being

25:27

sort of edge to it. So we

25:30

talk you through, Owen especially talks you

25:32

through some relaxing... Relaxation

25:35

techniques. That's it. Relaxing

25:37

relaxation techniques, yeah. Relaxing relaxation

25:39

techniques, yeah. And yeah, so you

25:41

sort of like after the episode,

25:44

if you've not fallen asleep halfway,

25:46

you feel, ahh. Excellent. Like you've

25:48

done a really nice fart, you

25:50

know. And a

25:52

little bit sleepy, nice. Well, thank you very much,

25:54

Bethan. No, I'm such a big Norman

25:56

fan, so to be on here is like... I'm

26:00

so excited. Wonderful deputy and Christmas pig, one and

26:02

all. Thank you, Christmas pig to you two and

26:04

to one and all.