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lived it.
1:01
By the time I finished my first year of college,
1:04
I couldn't exactly fool myself into thinking
1:06
I wasn't gay, even though it wasn't what
1:08
I wanted for my life.
1:10
I'd been through enough men by that point to
1:12
set aside any doubts that this was who
1:14
I was and that a wife and kids were not in my future.
1:18
But I had no clear image of what my future would hold,
1:21
what life might look like for this gay man. If
1:24
there were role models out there for the kind of life
1:26
I might want to lead, I hadn't
1:29
seen them. In April 1977,
1:32
toward the end of that first year, I
1:34
turned a sociology paper into a personal
1:36
fact-finding mission.
1:38
Under the cover of research, I
1:40
spent hours in the Vassar Library poring
1:43
over books about gay people.
1:45
I wasn't ready to be out in class, so I masked
1:47
my subject matter interest by adding
1:49
a decoy subject. I named
1:51
the paper, Marginal Man,
1:54
The Alcoholic
1:56
and the Homosexual.
1:57
My name is Eileen Leonard and
2:00
I was a professor of sociology at
2:02
Vassar and I worked there for 44 years. I
2:06
started in 1975.
2:08
So you arrived one year before I
2:10
did? Yes. I don't expect you to remember
2:12
me from the class. It was intro
2:14
sociology in the spring of 1977. Right,
2:16
right.
2:17
In fact, I do remember
2:20
you from that class. I think I have
2:22
a clearer memory of the students that I had
2:24
initially than I do as the decades
2:27
went by.
2:27
I can't believe we're having this conversation
2:30
all these years later. So let's talk
2:33
about my paper from April of 1977. I
2:36
may seem like a crazy person, but I saved all
2:38
of my papers from Vassar College.
2:41
I didn't think I was a particularly good writer, but reading
2:43
this paper over, I thought, well, for 18 years old, it was
2:45
pretty good. I was sort of out, but sort
2:48
of
2:48
not. Actually, by then I had broken
2:51
up with my girlfriend. I had a
2:52
boyfriend. It was a very confusing
2:55
year. I was really interested in writing about
2:57
the homosexual, not the alcoholic. I
2:59
went to the Vassar library to look and the
3:01
card catalog. A lot of
3:03
what I found was
3:04
terrible, but a
3:07
lot was also very interesting. The
3:09
reason I included alcoholics
3:11
is I thought if I only wrote about homosexuals
3:13
that you would figure out I was gay. I
3:16
found this concept of marginal men. It's a
3:18
category, which I learned in sociology,
3:21
which allowed me to do the paper. So
3:23
I'm going
3:26
to read the conclusion to the paper. It's a little
3:28
embarrassing because it's just I'm reading
3:30
my 18-year-old self. This is
3:32
just the last paragraph. If present
3:34
trends in the legitimization of
3:36
homosexuality continue, then
3:39
surely there is hope for the perhaps reluctant
3:42
acceptance of homosexuality into
3:44
American culture. Maybe then homosexuality
3:47
can be removed from the list of marginal men
3:50
so that the list reads one less member than
3:52
it does today.
3:54
Alcoholics, exclamation point. Homosexuals,
3:57
exclamation point. Marginal?
3:59
That's up to you. And then
4:02
I have one, two, three, four, five,
4:04
six, seven, eight exclamation points.
4:07
You gave me an A. Yes. I'm
4:10
not sure I would have. So if you don't mind
4:13
reading your handwritten comments at
4:15
the end of the paper. I'd
4:15
be happy to do that. And now I'm reading my
4:17
28-year-old self-commenting.
4:21
Your paper is well done. You should
4:24
have elaborated on the concept of marginal
4:26
man in more detail at the beginning of the
4:28
paper, but what's here is well written
4:30
and well organized. You point out
4:32
how difficult it is to be marginal in
4:34
society. This is clearly the case
4:37
for all kinds of quote unquote deviance.
4:40
I'm not sure I share your optimism about
4:42
the future status of homosexuality.
4:45
There is still
4:45
a long way to go and always
4:48
a possibility of regression.
4:51
I'm Eric Marcus.
4:54
This is Coming of Age during the 1970s. Chapter 5. Thank
4:56
you, Anita.
5:03
In my family, we discovered
5:06
real orange juice a little late because we didn't have money.
5:08
We were basically working class poor.
5:11
The first time I had fresh squeezed orange juice was
5:13
a special, special treat. I was so
5:15
shocked because it didn't even vaguely resemble
5:18
the orange stuff that came out
5:20
of a carton, which they may
5:22
have called it orange juice, but it didn't taste
5:24
that way. So I knew
5:27
of Anita Bryant as the orange
5:29
juice lady. And I recall
5:31
their slogan was something to the effect. A
5:34
day without orange juice is like a day without
5:36
sunshine. So that's how I knew Anita
5:38
Bryant.
5:48
While
5:48
New York City tried and failed and
5:51
tried and failed and
5:53
tried and failed to pass a gay rights bill, dozens
5:56
of places hit it first time lucky all
5:59
over the country. From Washington, D.C.
6:01
to Chicago to Kansas City, Columbus,
6:04
Ohio to Chapel Hill, North Carolina, Minneapolis
6:07
and Bloomington, Indiana.
6:10
By the end of 1976, 37 jurisdictions had legislated in
6:14
some way to protect gay people from discrimination.
6:18
But my sociology professor was right.
6:21
The backlash was coming.
6:25
On January 18, 1977, Miami-Dade
6:29
County held a hearing to amend its
6:31
human rights ordinance to forbid discrimination
6:34
based on, quote, sexual or affectionate
6:36
preference. Like New York,
6:39
Florida sodomy law had yet to be
6:41
repealed. So this wasn't
6:43
about legalizing physical relationships between
6:45
two people of the same sex. This
6:48
was about protecting people from being fired
6:50
or denied housing or discriminated
6:52
against in public accommodations because
6:54
of their sexual
6:55
orientation. The
7:00
hearing was packed. Church
7:02
folks, gay rights activists, and
7:05
toward the end, a celebrity.
7:07
The orange juice lady got up to testify.
7:11
A one-time beauty queen, a former Miss
7:13
Oklahoma, she said she was speaking
7:15
as a wife and mother.
7:17
Sounding as though she was about to cry, she said the proposed
7:20
amendment would cause discrimination against her and other Christians.
7:24
They were the real victims.
7:27
I believe I have that right, that
7:29
I can and do say no
7:32
to a very serious moral issue
7:35
that would violate my rights and
7:37
the rights of all the decent and morally
7:39
upstanding citizens regardless of their
7:42
race
7:42
or religion. The
7:44
final vote was five in favor, three
7:47
against. The ordinance passed. Gay
7:50
people celebrated, but those who opposed
7:52
it got busy. The ordinance becomes
7:54
law in ten days, but a religious group
7:57
headed by Anita Bryant said it will have
7:59
definitely been a
7:59
begin a petition drive to repeal the law.
8:02
Bryant and her supporters gathered six times
8:05
more signatures than needed to put repeal
8:07
on the ballot. The Dade County
8:09
Commission voted to call a special election
8:11
on June 7th. Repealing
8:13
ordinances became a rallying cry for the
8:16
Christian right, not just in Florida, but
8:18
around the country. The Save Our Children
8:20
campaign had been born. The
8:22
brewing backlash had broken through with
8:24
the perfect brand ambassador,
8:26
Anita Bryant.
8:34
Just biologically that God made mothers
8:36
so that we could reproduce, homosexuals
8:38
cannot reproduce biologically, but
8:40
they have to reproduce by recruiting
8:43
our children.
8:52
Summer, 1977. Queens, New York. Jamaica
8:57
Estates. A skinny
8:59
Tudor revival house on a leafy
9:01
street. In, it was probably
9:03
July, I was back from college,
9:06
living at home, which was a little tense
9:08
to start with because my mother and I had not
9:10
been getting along since my, since
9:13
I was 16, I think. Before
9:16
I left for college, she would often
9:18
say, I can't wait for you to leave. And I would say, I
9:21
can't wait to leave too.
9:24
Typical teenage stuff, but also I was gay
9:26
and coming to terms with it and was just angry
9:28
all the time. And depressed.
9:31
My mother and I had this complex relationship
9:34
that was in no small part related to the fact that my
9:36
father and mother split up when I was 10 and
9:38
my father then killed himself when I was 12. And
9:41
my mother depended upon me like a
9:43
partner as opposed to treating
9:46
me like her child. I knew way too much,
9:48
but I also wasn't in control. When it
9:50
was convenient for her, I
9:52
was then the child again and she made decisions,
9:54
even if I thought they were the wrong decisions. And I
9:57
deeply resented some of those things.
9:59
Interior. Kitchen. It's
10:02
morning. It was really an ugly
10:05
kitchen that had been done over by the people who lived
10:07
there before. It was dark, paneling
10:10
faux wood. And
10:13
we had a Formica kitchen
10:16
dinette set. The table
10:18
is pockmarked, damaged years
10:20
before, when Eric's mother flew
10:23
into a rage and hacked at it with a spatula,
10:26
sending chips of Formica flying.
10:30
I
10:31
remember at breakfast one morning,
10:33
picking up, I don't remember if we subscribed to
10:35
Time Magazine or Newsweek, I remember
10:37
holding the magazine and Anita Bryant was
10:39
on the cover and I was
10:42
in a rage and I said
10:45
that these were all lies. Who
10:47
is she? Who is Anita Bryant? This
10:49
is horrible. This is not
10:52
true about gay people. And I
10:54
recall being wildly
10:56
outraged, uncontrollably angry,
10:59
that people were referring to people
11:01
like me as recruiters. Why
11:04
is she saying this in print? Why is
11:06
she leading this campaign? Now they
11:08
use the word groomer. It's just, you know,
11:11
same product, different flavor. Anita
11:13
Bryant so enraged me because
11:15
I felt like she was reinforcing
11:18
all the things that, bad things that people thought about us and
11:21
also all the bad things I thought about myself. We
11:23
were sick, sinful, perverted and destined
11:27
to lead a life of ruin. Whereas
11:30
that
11:31
book, everything you want to know about sex but
11:33
afraid to ask, said about homosexuals, that
11:35
we were destined to have furtive
11:37
relationships and hideout in bushes
11:39
and offer candy to small children. So
11:43
even though I came to understand that that wasn't who
11:45
I was and that these were lies, it
11:47
was painful and enraging
11:49
to hear someone like Anita Bryant speak
11:52
so fervently
11:54
about how awful we were and that
11:56
we were a danger to children. And I remember thinking,
11:59
you're a danger. to children. I'm not the danger
12:01
to children because you are harming people like
12:04
me. I will never
12:06
fucking drink orange juice again.
12:09
My mother did not engage
12:11
me in conversation at that point other
12:13
than to say, why are you so upset? I don't
12:15
understand why you're so concerned about this. And
12:17
then I realized I might have tipped my hand.
12:20
That was closeted. That was a
12:22
very hard thing for me. I'm a terrible liar.
12:24
So I wasn't consciously
12:26
dropping hints and backed
12:29
off.
12:31
Anita Bryant's Save Our Children campaign
12:33
was the first organized opposition to the gay
12:36
rights movement. It was well organized,
12:38
well funded, and in a way it
12:41
illustrated how far we'd come that
12:43
gay liberation organizing provoked
12:45
such a response.
12:46
And it in turn provoked a response from
12:49
us.
12:50
LGBTQ people who heard Bryant's
12:52
language of bigotry and hate
12:55
realized that progress isn't inevitable
12:58
or a straight line.
13:01
Bob Kunst was one of the key gay activists
13:03
in Miami-Dade, an unabashed radical.
13:06
Here he is taking on the fundamentalist Christian
13:08
agenda for what it was, a smear
13:11
campaign accusing gay people, especially
13:14
gay men, of being child molesters.
13:16
Just like in New York City, opponents of Miami's
13:19
ordinance focused their messaging on
13:21
protecting children. Bob
13:23
Kunst was calling them out. Last
13:26
year, Florida had 100,000 child abuse cases, 30,000 which were reported, 1,200
13:31
kids literally killed by their own parents. Where
13:33
was the so-called Save Our Children when we really needed
13:35
them? The hate and viciousness assaulting
13:38
this entire community has backfired strongly
13:40
against the Anita Bryant forces because they haven't proven
13:42
their case at all. Not one incident
13:45
has happened here since passage of this ordinance, January
13:47
18th, nor in any of the 40 communities that have
13:49
passed such an ordinance, nor in the two
13:51
communities, Iowa City, Iowa, and Tucson,
13:54
Arizona, that have passed there since this began.
13:55
And what is happening with the so-called
13:58
Save Our Children is that they are asking for
13:59
a asking for the right to discriminate, not only against
14:02
gay people, but those who practice birth control
14:04
and have had abortions, who smoke pot, drink
14:06
alcohol, men and women who live with each other who are not
14:08
married, etc., ad nausea. In other
14:10
words, the attack appears to be on everyone who
14:13
cannot fit their molds, who they cannot control,
14:15
and who have different affectionate and sexual preferences.
14:18
Efforts to repeal anti-discrimination ordinances,
14:20
inspired by Save Our Children, in some cases
14:23
sponsored by it, were springing up all
14:25
over in places like Wichita, Kansas,
14:27
St. Paul, Dakota, and Eugene, Oregon.
14:30
In Seattle, Charlie Bryden
14:32
was aware of the rising tide of reactionary forces.
14:35
He was a businessman who gathered other gay
14:38
and lesbian business people for networking lunches
14:40
under the banner of the Dorian Group. His
14:43
organization was instrumental in passing a
14:45
nondiscrimination ordinance in Seattle in 1975.
14:50
Interview with Charles Bryden, Sunday, November 19, 1989, at 12.30
14:52
p.m., at the home of Charles Bryden
14:57
in Seattle, Washington. Interviewer
14:59
is Eric Marcus, tape one,
15:00
side one. Charlie remembers
15:03
when Anita Bryant first hit his radar. She
15:05
was singing Orange Juice commercials, and she
15:08
was this former entertainer,
15:11
and she seemed quite benign, and then
15:13
she does this thing down there, and it
15:15
caused quite a tizzy. I
15:17
think people up here largely saw
15:19
it as, you know, there's this
15:22
attitude of Easterners towards Westerners.
15:24
Well, there's also some of that handed
15:26
back in return, and only the primitives over
15:28
there could have this happen
15:31
to them. There
15:33
was a little arrogance in that, a lot of arrogance
15:35
in that. Some
15:39
money was raised here. I
15:41
know it's one of the Dorian dinners, I think. We even
15:44
had a general collection and raised
15:47
a couple thousand dollars. It was a
15:49
feeling that it was there, but it wasn't,
15:51
you know, an immediate threat to people here.
15:54
What was the purpose of raising the money for? Where did it
15:56
go? Down to Florida.
15:59
they are gay rights groups around
16:02
the country we're raising money to send to florida
16:04
and fun the fight against repeal political
16:07
operatives from san francisco a new york when
16:09
down to miami to pitch him but
16:12
as the drumbeat for appeal grew louder and
16:14
other parts of the country they still
16:16
seem far away from where charlie were saying
16:18
was a sense of well here as yell at least
16:20
yeah we're we're way beyond that we got the
16:22
ordinances the environment so much different as
16:28
a little censor
16:29
little snobbery probably and in that
16:32
the fight in miami was taking center stage
16:35
nationally save our children
16:37
lobbied hard to defeat a resolution
16:39
before congress each or to know
16:41
nine eight for a nationwide ban
16:43
on homophobic discrimination in housing
16:46
employment and public accommodations
16:48
in florida save our children ran
16:50
full page ads in the miami herald
16:52
and the miami news according
16:55
to gay activists the herald refused
16:57
to run ads from groups supporting the nondiscrimination
16:59
ordinance
16:59
and this
17:02
tv commercial from save our children
17:04
the engine to florida homes in the run
17:06
up to the vote miami
17:10
in asia at a time in
17:12
san francisco when they take
17:14
the the street it's a parade of homosexual
17:17
men are going other men cavorting with
17:19
little boys
17:21
despite charged rhetoric like that
17:24
gay
17:24
people don't exist they flaunt
17:26
they don't march they cavort despite
17:28
the actual words we heard coming out of their
17:30
actual mouse those campaigning
17:33
against equal rights insisted
17:35
they weren't coming after gay people they
17:38
were just defending children from being quote
17:40
recruited by us
17:43
that really thin loved gay
17:45
people however he
17:47
goalie how can you hear me rolling my
17:49
eyes eleven enough to tell the too
17:52
because i know that there is hope for the how essential
17:55
that they're willing to turn
17:57
from ah anything with any
17:59
and that
18:01
they can be ex-homosexuals, the same as there can
18:03
be an ex-murder, an ex-thief, or ex-anybody.
18:07
On June 7, 1977, Miami-Dade residents voted 2-1
18:09
to repeal the gay rights ordinance.
18:15
The next day, The New York Times published an op-ed
18:18
from the co-executive directors of the National Gay
18:20
and Lesbian Task Force, Gino Leary
18:22
and Bruce Veller.
18:23
It began, quote, Anita
18:26
Bryant and Her Save Our Children, Inc.,
18:28
are doing the 20 million lesbians and gay
18:31
men in America an enormous
18:33
favor.
18:34
They are focusing for the public the
18:36
nature of the prejudice and discrimination
18:38
we face. Close quote.
18:42
The question was, did highlighting
18:45
the nature of that prejudice and discrimination
18:48
mean that Florida would be an exception?
18:51
Or were newly passed
18:53
ordinances around the country about to
18:55
topple one by one?
18:58
Charlie Brydon again. Then it got a little
19:00
more uncomfortable is that Bryant
19:02
things started to spread elsewhere. There
19:04
was a problem in Colorado and then
19:06
Kansas City and St.
19:09
Paul. I think the St. Paul thing shook
19:11
a lot of people up. Those drum
19:13
beats of regression were sounding much
19:16
closer to home.
19:17
When Charlie Brydon picked up the Free
19:19
Weekly newspaper in Seattle at the end of June 1977,
19:23
he almost choked. His face was staring
19:25
back at him. Beside the headline, Ready
19:28
When You Are, Anita? I
19:30
just had a cow at that
19:32
headline. I raised hell
19:35
with the editor. I said, how could you? I
19:37
never even said that. You put it in
19:39
quotes and put it on the front page. What
19:43
a provocative thing to do. It's very uncharacteristic
19:45
of me. That's a full
19:47
page picture of you on the front page saying, Ready
19:49
When You Are, Anita? Yes. It
19:51
couldn't have been. I
19:53
never said it. Oh,
19:57
well. That's dated.
19:59
June 29th of July 5th, 1977. So
20:04
this was before the repeal was called for here in Seattle?
20:07
Charlie was angry at that front page because
20:09
he wanted to take a different approach in Seattle.
20:12
Instead of provoking or even loudly
20:15
responding to the Save Our Children campaign,
20:17
he wanted to deny them the oxygen of publicity,
20:20
to ignore them in the hopes they would go away.
20:23
After the defeat in Dade County, the
20:26
blame game was in full swing.
20:28
Familiar splits and controversies
20:30
like how radical to be, how
20:32
provocative, whether to ask nicely
20:34
or demand loudly, were back on
20:37
the gay agenda. And the issue didn't
20:39
go away in Seattle.
20:41
In the spring of 1978, a pair of police officers filed
20:45
to repeal the city's gay rights ordinances.
20:48
They needed to collect 17,000 signatures by August 1st to
20:52
get it on the November ballot. I just remember,
20:54
I thought, oh, they'll never get the signatures. And
20:56
I kind of... The strategy at the
20:59
time was to not draw any media attention
21:01
to the signature gathering issue. What
21:04
at that point, in 1977, I had quite... Generally,
21:08
the community had some very wonderful political
21:10
chips.
21:14
When this cop filed the petitions
21:17
to gather signatures, we
21:20
immediately formed a very quiet group
21:22
to begin planning. And most of it was the political
21:24
brains of the city that came together
21:27
and gave me the
21:29
advice, don't do anything to give media attention
21:31
to it. Well, now that immediately put me at odds
21:33
with the radicals who wanted to
21:35
focus attention on this and try and
21:37
create, I suspect,
21:39
the feeling that you are a bad person if you sign
21:42
these petitions. So
21:44
anyhow, the
21:44
thing eventually did qualify,
21:47
and we did face
21:49
that. I was probably the darkest
21:52
evening of my life was
21:54
the day that the news
21:57
reported that the petition...
21:59
had been filed and they contained more
22:02
than adequate signatures to place
22:04
this thing on the ballot. And
22:08
well, I just didn't know what we would do. Why
22:11
was it? Was it such a dark day? Because you didn't know what direction
22:13
it was moving. It was very depressing to see that this
22:15
thing had actually was going to descend on Seattle.
22:17
I mean, what we had seen was a chain of defeats
22:20
around the country. Why
22:22
would it be any different here?
22:27
I don't think she had a clue that
22:30
I was until the moment that she finally asked
22:32
me if I was gay.
22:35
Jamaica Estates, Queens,
22:38
Summer 1977, The Marcus Family Home. Probably
22:45
within days of the Anita Bryant conversation,
22:47
I was going out.
22:50
It was early evening to see a
22:52
friend of mine. And she asked how he was doing.
22:54
And I said, you know, I don't think he's doing so well. He's
22:57
been very depressed. I think he might be gay. She
23:01
got suspicious and
23:03
stopped and paused and said, why
23:07
are you being so casual about that? And
23:10
that's when she, she almost was speaking to herself.
23:12
She said, well, maybe that's because you're
23:15
gay.
23:17
And
23:18
then I said, see you
23:21
later, Ma.
23:32
If I could do it over, I would
23:34
have said, and there are no do overs in
23:36
this world. I would have said, let's sit down and
23:38
talk about this. But that's me, 64
23:41
year old, me talking now, 18 year
23:43
old me wanted out of there as fast as I could
23:45
get out of there. And she didn't say stop.
23:48
And maybe
23:51
I said, let's talk about that later.
23:53
I don't recall saying that. I just remember saying goodbye.
23:56
And I headed out the door in the kitchen,
23:58
which went into the garage.
23:59
and drove to my friend's house
24:02
and I said to Richard, what am I gonna do, what
24:04
am I gonna do?
24:06
My mother thinks I'm gay and he knew
24:09
I was gay. And
24:11
I stayed quite late at
24:13
Richard's, hoping my mother would
24:15
be asleep by the time I got home. And
24:18
I remember you could
24:21
roll down the driveway with the car
24:24
off and the lights off.
24:27
So I turned into the driveway, rolled down
24:30
the driveway, with
24:32
the lights off and with the engine off and
24:34
I crept back into the house and crept
24:37
up the stairs. My mom's bedroom was off
24:39
the stairs on the second floor. I had my
24:41
bedroom on the third floor. I had to open a door and go
24:43
up those stairs. I literally
24:45
crawled up the stairs on all four
24:48
so that the stairs wouldn't creak
24:50
and
24:50
wake my mom up. But
24:52
as I got to the landing, I
24:55
could see my mother's door was open to crack and
24:58
she said, I want to talk to you.
25:02
So, and you can only imagine
25:04
how my heart
25:05
was pounding at this point because
25:07
like any gay kid or most gay kids, I was
25:09
terrified of what my mother would say. And I
25:12
was such a good boy that
25:15
this was the one incredible stain
25:17
that I was gonna, that
25:21
this was
25:22
just the one incredible stain. I
25:25
had got good grades. I didn't cause trouble
25:27
other than being a very cranky kid at that point.
25:30
So I went into her bedroom
25:33
and
25:34
sat on the bed. She
25:37
was already in bed. And
25:42
I don't remember what she said, interestingly,
25:47
but I recall saying, yes,
25:51
I'm gay. And I said,
25:53
do you feel guilty? Because by this
25:55
point I had investigated PFLAG, which
25:58
was once known as Parents, Friends, and Friends. and families of lesbians
26:01
and gays. And from my understanding
26:03
and my research, parents often
26:05
felt guilty about having
26:07
a gay kid, that
26:10
they saw it as their fault. That was one of the
26:12
beliefs. Aggressive mother, passive
26:14
father, all of that Freudian
26:18
bullshit. And
26:21
she said, I don't feel guilty, I'm disappointed.
26:26
Now, she might have just as well
26:28
picked up a knife and stuck it in my heart.
26:31
And I started crying, because there
26:32
was nothing worse
26:36
she could have said than she was disappointed. The
26:41
last part of our conversation was me telling
26:43
her that I wanted her to go to PFLAG. And
26:45
she said she wanted
26:47
me to go to a psychiatrist. And I assumed she wanted
26:50
me to go to a psychiatrist because she wanted me to
26:52
change.
26:55
I said no, and she said no. We were both very stubborn.
27:03
And that was the conversation. I went back up to my room. It
27:09
was too late to call anybody. We didn't
27:11
have the internet or texts or any
27:13
of that. And that was the conversation. That's how it
27:15
went. Now,
27:18
I learned
27:19
later that my mother wanted me to see a psychiatrist because
27:21
she was a psychiatrist. And
27:24
she was fearful that I would
27:27
kill myself because
27:30
she recognized me as being depressed. And
27:33
my father had killed himself a few years prior.
27:35
So I was not appreciative of her
27:37
concern in that regard. It
27:40
was many years before she went to
27:42
PFLAG and it was many years before
27:44
I went to a therapist. I
27:47
wish that she had gone to PFLAG early.
27:49
I wish I had gone to a therapist early. I really
27:51
needed a therapist even more than she needed PFLAG.
27:54
And
27:56
I wish I had handled it differently. I
28:00
have written about the
28:02
ideal way in which young people can share
28:04
this news with their parents. The ideal
28:06
way is not to have a parent say, I
28:08
think you might be gay, and then to say,
28:10
bye Ma, I'm out of here. But
28:13
I was scared.
28:14
And I, I mean, I have a lot of compassion
28:17
for myself at that age. I was 18 years old. So
28:20
I
28:21
was doing the best I could in a world that was, that
28:23
was often challenging for young gay
28:26
people. But I nonetheless
28:29
was incredibly relieved that
28:33
it was going to be OK.
28:36
I would also add, not just, not
28:38
just that you're 18, it's always hard to be young
28:41
and not just that the world it was challenging.
28:44
But I think there's
28:45
also, if I may editorialize,
28:47
I mean, you're getting at this already. I
28:49
mean, it just sounds like you were two people
28:51
who ended up
28:53
really doing the best you could considering that you
28:55
were sort of you
28:57
were moving without a map, you were going without a guide.
29:00
Like no one had written the books that you had written yet.
29:02
You couldn't go online to find out the best
29:04
way to come out to your parents. I mean, it
29:06
sounds to me kind of remarkable that you've
29:09
you did the best you could with no guidance. Do
29:11
you feel that's accurate? Yeah,
29:13
with a little bit of guidance, I'm thinking that
29:16
I probably knew about PFLAG. I must have looked
29:18
at some of their material because I knew that parents
29:20
often felt guilty. I did I had
29:22
done my research for for my my
29:25
social sociology class for Miss Leonard
29:27
in the in the spring of 77. So
29:30
I I had more understanding, I think, than most
29:32
young gay people.
29:35
But really, there there wasn't I couldn't give my mother.
29:38
Is it a choice? Questions and answers about gay
29:40
and lesbian people or lesbian gay people? I can't
29:42
remember what the title is. The book I wrote later. But
29:45
based on my experience, then I I
29:48
knew later that I wanted to write a book that
29:51
would provide people with the answers that I didn't
29:53
have at that age. So yeah, I was
29:55
operating in my mom was operating in
29:58
a world that did.
29:59
not provide the kinds
30:02
of information and guidance that are
30:04
available today to young people
30:06
and to parents. And it was still a world where
30:09
homosexuality was not discussed openly
30:12
and not nearly as visible
30:15
as it
30:17
is now. Remember, it was 1977 and there were no gay
30:19
celebrities, there
30:23
were no gay sports stars, there was, there,
30:28
it was such a different world.
30:29
The difference between then and now
30:32
came about in no small part because
30:34
of the fallout from the Save Our Children
30:37
campaign. So many people
30:39
mobilized against that hateful campaign.
30:42
Even I, in my
30:44
own small way, was mobilized
30:46
by Anita Bryant.
30:49
I'm thinking back to B.B. Scarpey last
30:51
chapter when she said,
30:53
If you get steps on constantly, a little thing is enough
30:55
to set people off like that. I can't take this anymore.
30:58
Sometimes, enough
31:00
is enough. Most gay people
31:03
then and today just want
31:05
to live their lives. But Anita
31:07
Bryant and Save Our Children were
31:09
coming after us. She had set
31:11
people off. And in spite of a
31:13
string of defeats, including Miami Dade,
31:16
or maybe because of those defeats, glimmers
31:18
of hope started to appear.
31:21
I know why you cry, sister
31:24
Anita. A
31:27
life spent on your body while a ruse and
31:29
slave, yeah. And
31:32
it's your blind innocence.
31:35
Senator, Supervisor Harvey Milk.
31:39
In November of 1977, Harvey
31:42
Milk became the first openly gay person
31:44
elected to public office in California.
31:47
My name is Harvey Milk, and
31:49
I'm here to recruit you.
31:52
After Milk took office as a member of San Francisco's
31:54
Board of Supervisors, he almost immediately
31:57
returned to campaign mode to fight the Briggs
31:59
Initiative. Also known as Prop 6,
32:02
Briggs had been spawned by the campaign to repeal
32:04
Miami-Dade's gay ordinance. Arkansas
32:07
and Oklahoma had passed laws banning
32:09
gay people from working in public schools, and
32:12
conservative California state legislator John
32:14
Briggs figured that sounded like a good idea
32:16
for his state. But there was a growing
32:18
backlash
32:19
to the backlash.
32:21
I'm tired of listening to the Anita Brimes
32:24
twist the language of the Bible to fit
32:26
their own distorted apple. Gay
32:30
people all across the state,
32:33
the Briggs can only be defeated
32:35
if each and every one of you
32:38
comes out to everyone you
32:40
know you must. Milk
32:46
wasn't the first openly gay person elected to political
32:48
office in the U.S., as many people believe. That
32:51
was Kathy Kazuchenko, an out
32:53
lesbian who was elected to the Ann Arbor City Council
32:56
in Michigan in April of 1974. But
32:59
Harvey was so high profile. And
33:02
loud. Here he is confronting
33:04
California state senator John Briggs in
33:06
September of 1978. You
33:09
are the one who keeps bringing up this phony recruitment.
33:11
You know you're lying. You know you're changing
33:14
the statements around. And you're doing
33:15
that all the way around, just like you shifted
33:17
the money around in your campaigns. And you talk
33:19
about morality. And I question what is your
33:21
real motive behind it? What is your real ambitions
33:24
behind this? What are you really using this for? And
33:26
stop this phony issue that you know is a phony issue.
33:29
California's former governor Ronald Reagan
33:31
joined President Jimmy Carter, former President Gerald
33:34
Ford, and Governor Jerry Brown in
33:36
urging Californians to vote no on Prop 6.
33:40
Reagan wrote in the Los Angeles Herald Examiner
33:42
days before the election, quote, Homosexuality
33:45
is not a contagious disease like the measles.
33:48
Prevailing scientific opinion is that an individual
33:51
sexuality is determined at a very early
33:53
age and that a child's teachers do not
33:55
really influence this.
33:59
As we say in the neighborhood,
34:01
no shit, Sherlock. The
34:04
Briggs Initiative was rejected in November 1978. We're
34:10
coming out to walk in the sunlight.
34:16
We're coming out to fight for
34:18
our lives. To the gay
34:20
community all over this state.
34:23
My message to you is, so
34:26
far a lot of people joined us and
34:29
rejected Proposition 6 and now
34:32
we owe them something. We
34:34
owe them to continue the
34:37
education campaign that
34:38
took place. We must destroy
34:40
the myths once and for all, shatter
34:43
them. We must continue
34:45
to speak out and most
34:47
importantly, most importantly,
34:50
every gay person
34:52
must come out.
35:00
That same election day in November of 1978, Charlie
35:02
Brydon was crossing his fingers in a ballroom
35:05
in Seattle. What
35:07
was election night like? We
35:13
had the biggest hall in town and all
35:16
the television stations were there and as
35:18
the early returns came in and started
35:20
there was going to be an overwhelming defeat. The people jammed.
35:28
So many people came downtown that
35:31
night and the hall of the fire department showed up and they were going to shut
35:33
us down because we had over capacity
35:35
in the building.
35:37
But it was very exciting. We had a telephone line
35:39
down to California and the no one six committee
35:42
and we relished the
35:47
idea and the fact that we won
35:50
up here by a greater percentage
35:53
than the vote was in California. The
35:56
Seattle effort to repeal protections for gay
35:58
people was beaten back by a popular
35:59
vote of 63% to 37%.
36:17
Anita Bryant faced consequences for her actions.
36:20
Boycotts, canceled TV shows, and
36:22
she was dropped by the Florida Citrus Commission. The
36:26
1970s ended for her with a messy
36:28
divorce, and later she would declare bankruptcy.
36:31
Twice.
36:32
But the Save Our Children campaign's success
36:34
was noted.
36:36
Less than two years after the defeat of the Briggs Initiative
36:38
in California, the firebrand televangelist
36:41
Jerry Falwell had established the so-called
36:43
Moral Majority. It was a coalition
36:46
of conservative evangelicals hellbent
36:48
on influencing the National Republican Party.
36:51
While it was dissolved in 1989, the
36:53
Moral Majority wreaked havoc throughout the country
36:56
on a wide range of social and cultural issues,
36:59
from promoting anti-gay laws to legislating
37:01
against abortion and pornography and blocking
37:03
ratification of the Equal Rights Amendment.
37:15
Like I said, with my mother, things were
37:17
complicated. We had a relationship
37:20
where I was sometimes the adult, sometimes
37:22
the child. She could be unpredictable.
37:26
Sometimes she scared me. Yet, I
37:28
desperately wanted her approval.
37:32
But after that night, after gliding
37:35
down the driveway with the headlights out and
37:37
creeping up the stairs trying to sneak in unnoticed,
37:40
after seeing her bedroom door cracked and the light
37:43
on,
37:44
after hearing her call me
37:45
in, after having one of the
37:48
most consequential and terrifying
37:50
conversations of my life, and
37:52
after ending that conversation with her disappointment
37:55
so heavy in the air, it crushed
37:57
my chest.
37:59
All that, my mother did something
38:02
totally unexpected.
38:08
She very quickly pivoted and made me feel completely
38:10
comfortable and embraced. She,
38:13
um, uh, I
38:16
remember a conversation we had
38:18
in the kitchen, again in the kitchen, next
38:21
to the refrigerator,
38:23
and she had been dating at that point and occasionally
38:25
brought home a man.
38:26
And I think at that point she might have had her much
38:29
younger boyfriend. And she said,
38:31
um, that
38:36
she didn't have a double standard, that if she
38:38
could bring a man home, that I could as well.
38:42
And she bought me a full-size bed.
38:44
She replaced my twin bed with a full-size bed. She
38:46
was always very welcoming of boyfriends.
38:50
So, um, really
38:53
in some ways she was a marvel as I look
38:55
back, because I remember
38:59
one time I had a boyfriend in the kitchen. He was in
39:01
a bathrobe. It was the first time I think she met a boyfriend
39:03
who stayed overnight. She was perfectly welcoming.
39:06
She made breakfast for us. So
39:08
she was really terrific, but it was 13 years
39:11
before she went to a PFLAG meeting. And
39:14
then she jumped in with both feet.
39:18
So what did that look like? This would have been 1990 then,
39:20
I guess? It was the early 90s,
39:23
yes. She
39:25
started going to meetings, and then she,
39:27
uh, remember
39:30
we went to the 1993 march on Washington, as did she.
39:34
And she had her PFLAG sash and all
39:36
of her buttons, and it's one of my favorite photos
39:39
with my mom, which
39:41
we'll include in the episode notes. And
39:45
she co-chaired a New York City
39:47
PFLAG dinner, which was
39:49
really wonderful. She
39:52
joined me in an event
39:55
at the Gay Center here in New York, now the LGBTQ
39:57
Center,
39:59
Making History, which was the
40:02
original name of the Making a History book. She
40:04
joined me for an event, a launch event.
40:07
We had maybe 300 people at the center.
40:10
And my mom and I read an excerpt from the
40:12
book. My mom played the Gene
40:14
Manford part. I played the Morty Manford
40:16
part. Gene Manford was in the audience. It was one of the
40:18
most moving experiences I
40:20
had when that book was published. Morty
40:23
had just died a few weeks before and Gene was in
40:25
the audience.
40:26
And my mom and I were featured on the
40:28
front page of the metro
40:31
section of what was then New York
40:34
Newsday. It doesn't exist anymore.
40:36
And it was great.
40:38
And I remember one of my relatives
40:40
said to me, had
40:44
some concern about my mother sort of moving in on
40:46
my territory. I
40:49
was really happy for her to enjoy
40:52
the spotlight over this. I
40:54
know she got a lot of pleasure from
40:57
being the mom
41:00
of a minor gay celebrity.
41:02
I remember her telling me that she was traveling
41:05
once, and this is before Making
41:07
History was published. And she
41:09
was reading a copy of The Male
41:11
Couple's Guide to Living Together, my first book. And
41:14
she got into a conversation. It was
41:16
in the Caribbean, I think, with somebody who
41:18
was there. It was somebody who recognized the
41:21
book. And she very proudly
41:23
said she was the mother of the author.
41:26
So
41:28
such a complicated relationship with my mother.
41:30
In some ways, I so resented her, but also I
41:34
really was protective of her and
41:37
wanted her to have a good life.
41:39
She had had a hard life. Her father died when
41:41
she was 12. She was
41:43
an only child. Her mother was an immigrant. They
41:46
were poor.
41:47
My mother couldn't go to college because she had to go to work to
41:50
help support her mom. And then she
41:52
married my dad, who was mentally ill.
41:54
She didn't know it at first. She was mentally ill,
41:57
which was undiagnosed too. So.
41:59
I was very protective of her and
42:02
was happy to see her happy. And if if if
42:05
her being happy meant having her at the podium
42:07
with me at the center and she was a good reader,
42:09
by the way, I was really happy for
42:11
it. Something
42:13
I didn't know. And I only learned
42:16
at a meeting with Danny Drom, who is
42:18
a city councilman here in New York, a former
42:20
city councilman now and a real hero
42:23
of the movement.
42:24
When I met with him five years
42:27
ago, the first time to talk about
42:29
education issues in New York City
42:31
and how making gay history might
42:33
have some involvement in developing
42:36
curriculum materials. Danny
42:38
mentioned that he knew my mother. My mother had been dead
42:40
for years by this point. And I said, how
42:43
did you know my mother? He
42:45
said, well, she helped co-found PFLAG
42:48
Queens, the Queens chapter of PFLAG with him
42:51
and with Gene Manford.
42:52
I didn't know.
42:55
Wow. She never told me.
42:58
And I don't think I'm forgetting this.
43:01
I think I would have remembered if she told me. And
43:04
I think that she didn't tell me if
43:07
that was indeed the case. I think she didn't
43:09
tell me
43:10
because I had given her a little bit
43:12
of a lecture about how this
43:14
was my issue, not hers, and
43:16
that she had become this
43:19
activist. And I know this is a
43:21
problem for PFLAG parents sometimes. They
43:24
wind up being more involved than their kids.
43:28
But I think I
43:30
harbored a little bit of a resentment that that
43:32
my mother had become this activist.
43:36
But then I was also proud of her. She had
43:38
gone back to college. She got her social work degree. She
43:40
volunteered the gay men's health crisis and she ran
43:42
a support group for gay men whose
43:45
partners had died from AIDS. So
43:48
she was a
43:50
good person. And she
43:53
was protecting herself probably by not telling
43:55
me that she had helped to co-found
43:57
Queens PFLAG.
43:59
She were around that I could say, my, why didn't
44:02
you tell me? I'm so, you know, I'm really proud of
44:04
her. But I never
44:06
got to...
44:11
Shane, you get me to cry every
44:13
time. She's not around
44:16
for me to tell her. She's been, she died in 2000 and...
44:21
What year? 2004. She was 73,
44:24
long time ago. And it was years later
44:26
that I learned that she'd co-founded
44:28
PFLAG Queens. Anything
44:31
else you'd want to tell her? Oh,
44:34
God. Shane,
44:40
there are so many things I could tell my mother,
44:43
but I think I will refrain right now.
44:46
I think I would tell her that I
44:49
was harder on her than I needed
44:51
to be, that she was really, in
44:54
some ways had done the
44:57
right thing, mostly the right
44:59
things in dealing with me, that I wish she hadn't said she was
45:01
disappointed. But as
45:04
far as the range of reactions
45:06
that parents have to gay kids, it was
45:09
pretty good.
45:16
Sometimes good things happen for the wrong reasons.
45:20
In an ideal world, there's
45:22
of course no such thing.
45:24
I would have done things differently.
45:27
I wish I hadn't said, see you
45:29
later, Ma, that night she asked me if I was
45:31
gay.
45:34
I wish I'd gone to see a psychiatrist and
45:36
she'd gone to PFLAG sooner. I
45:40
wish I'd known the extent of my mom's allyship
45:43
and activism. And
45:45
I wish I'd been able to thank her for
45:47
all her good work before she died
45:49
nearly 20 years ago at the age of 73.
45:54
I wish it hadn't taken a hateful figure like Anita Bryant
45:56
in her homophobia to
45:58
reinvigorate the fight for gay people. writes, and
46:01
I wish it hadn't taken all that hateful
46:03
rhetoric to provoke a defiant
46:05
streak in me.
46:08
But that's how it happened. Anita Bryant's
46:10
grievances galvanized us. She
46:13
was the perfect symbol for an appeal
46:16
to so-called family values. And
46:18
she was also, by the way, there was
46:20
no small amount of misogyny at work here too.
46:23
The perfect symbol to direct our anger
46:25
toward.
46:27
So yeah, thank you, Anita.
46:46
This season of Making Gay History is produced
46:49
and written by me, Eric Marcus, and
46:51
Making Gay History's founding editor, Sara Burningham.
46:54
With archival research and production assistance from
46:56
Brian Fari and additional archival research
46:58
from Tyler Alpertario. Special
47:00
thanks to interviewers slash oral historian, Shane
47:02
O'Neill. Our studio engineers
47:05
for this episode were Casey Danielson and
47:07
Charles de Montobello. Coming of age
47:09
during the 1970s was mixed in sound
47:11
design by Anne Pope. This
47:13
season of Making Gay History was recorded at CDM
47:16
Sound Studios. Our theme music
47:18
and additional scoring were composed by Fritz Myers.
47:21
Our new theme features flautist Anna
47:23
Urie. Many thanks to our hardworking
47:25
crew at Making Gay History, including Deputy
47:28
Director Inga Duttaia, photo editor
47:30
Michael Green, and our social media producers
47:32
Christiana Pena and Nick Porter. Thank
47:35
you as well to the New York Public Library
47:37
Manuscripts and Archives Division, UCLA
47:40
Film and Television Archives, KPIX-TV
47:42
in the Bay Area, NWTVJ
47:45
Miami. Don't Pray for
47:47
Me was performed by Linda Tillery, composed by Mary
47:50
Watkins, and released on Olivia Records.
47:53
Making Gay History is made possible thanks to the ongoing
47:55
support of the Jonathan Logan Family Foundation, Broadway
47:58
Cares Equity Fights AIDS, the Kalamaz Foundation,
48:01
and Christopher Street Financial. We're deeply
48:03
grateful to Patrick Hines and Steve Tipton for their
48:06
two-year grant in support of Making Gay History's mission
48:08
to bring LGBTQ history to life through
48:10
the voices of the people who lived it. And
48:13
thank you to Ted Smith and Matt Vieira
48:15
for their recent major gifts. I
48:17
wrote to Matt to ask why he decided to support
48:19
Making Gay History, and he wrote, I
48:22
felt inspired to donate to MGH because
48:24
across the nation, I see states passing
48:27
laws discriminating against LGBTQ
48:29
plus people. And I feel it's critical
48:31
now more than ever that we learn our
48:33
history to know what worked and what
48:35
didn't work in the past to be successful
48:38
in our fight for equality today. Please
48:40
consider joining us on Making Gay History's Patreon
48:42
channel, where you can support our work and at the
48:44
same time gain access to exclusive
48:46
interviews, behind the scenes conversations,
48:49
and additional archival audio excerpts that
48:51
we think you'll enjoy hearing. Sign up
48:53
for just $5 a month at patreon.com
48:55
or go to makinggayhistory.com and
48:59
click on the Patreon button. Right
49:02
now on our Patreon channel, you can hear my
49:04
conversation with Ethan Ghetto, who is one of
49:06
the young activists who traveled to Florida to
49:08
help organize against Anita Bryan's campaign
49:11
to repeal the Miami-Dade ordinance. There's
49:13
a lot we can learn from the people who fought
49:15
against a past generation's anti-gay
49:18
bigots.
49:19
Not quite ready to go yet, because my former
49:21
sociology professor, Eileen Leonard,
49:25
had a mother-son story of her own to tell me, a story about her
49:27
and her son, Tim, and
49:29
the ripples of history that she shared with
49:31
me as we were wrapping up our conversation, our
49:33
first conversation in more than 40 years. But
49:36
you know what's interesting, Eric, is that Anita
49:39
Bryan helped you. You helped my son come out to
49:41
me. And
49:43
I think that's what I'm going to do. You
49:46
helped my son come out to me.
49:50
And when my husband
49:52
and I both thought that when Tim was in high school,
49:55
that he might be gay. You know, there weren't a
49:57
lot of the typical going out with girls
49:59
and pop. posters on the wall in the bedroom and
50:01
all this awful stuff. And
50:04
I thought maybe I should ask him about
50:06
it. And then I thought, no, maybe this
50:08
is something that's private and I should wait until
50:10
he comes to us, that this wasn't
50:13
something as a mother I should be broaching with him.
50:15
So I did what I usually do. I started doing
50:17
research and I found one of your books.
50:20
And since I knew you and trusted you, I
50:23
found in that book whether
50:25
the, as I remembered, it was like a question
50:28
and answer book. You'd ask questions and then give
50:30
answers. And one of them must have
50:32
had something to do with should parents broach
50:34
the subject with their children.
50:37
And my recollection of it was that your
50:40
answer was yes. And so that's
50:42
what I did. I went out for a walk with Tim
50:44
and our dog. And I
50:47
asked him, and Vassar helped me with this, I asked
50:50
him whether or not he was questioning his sexuality.
50:53
And he said yes. I
50:55
threw my arms around him and thanked him for telling
50:57
me. And we went on from there.
50:59
That makes me cry. So
51:02
you were a help to my family. Well,
51:05
you were a help to me and being my sociology teacher so
51:07
I could write that paper in your class. It just all
51:09
comes full circle. When
51:12
was that walk? What year and how old
51:13
was it? He was a junior in high school. So
51:16
that would have been what year? What
51:19
year would that have been? 2000, no,
51:21
he'd graduated from college in 2000, early
51:24
So 20 years ago. My
51:28
son is doing great. He lives in New
51:30
York City. He's a member of the
51:32
New York City Gay Men's Choir Chorus.
51:36
And he's out and proud. So
51:39
he's doing very, very well.
51:40
Is it a choice that was published first in the
51:43
mid-90s? Yeah, mid-90s. I had a hard
51:46
time getting it published. Is
51:48
that right? Oh, God, that seemed to
51:50
me recalling it so informative and helpful.
51:53
The editor who I tried to sell it to said we already
51:55
know all these answers. Why do we need this book? Oh,
51:58
wow.
52:02
As I said to Shane O'Neill earlier in the episode,
52:05
when I came out to my mother, there was no
52:07
guidebook for me for how to talk to her and
52:10
no guidebook for her for how to deal with me.
52:13
My question and answer book, Is It a Choice?, was
52:16
published 20 years after that awkward and
52:18
painful conversation in my mother's bedroom. It
52:21
was the kind of guidebook I wish I'd had,
52:24
and I'm so glad it helped Eileen and Timothy Leonard.
52:27
Here's another ripple of history, spreading out through
52:29
the generations. I had coincidentally
52:32
met Timothy Leonard through my work, decades
52:35
after his mother had found my book. Tim
52:37
works for the National Parks Conservation Association,
52:40
and he had a role in the complicated process of
52:42
getting Stonewall declared a national monument
52:45
by President Barack Obama back in We
52:49
met in the run-up to the Stonewall 50 celebrations.
52:52
Tim is now the NPCA's Northeast Program
52:55
Manager and leads meetings with the many
52:57
stakeholders involved in managing and
52:59
celebrating the Stonewall National Monument, including
53:02
from
53:02
time to time
53:03
me. We never know
53:05
how far these ripples will travel.
53:11
Coming of age during the 1970s is
53:13
a production of Making Gay History. Join
53:16
us next time for the final installment of this series,
53:19
Chapter 6, Marching On.
53:23
I'm Eric Marcus, so long, until next
53:25
time.
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