0:01

Welcome back to season two of

0:03

married to growth podcast .

0:05

And it's only season two , because we took

0:07

a lot of months off with summer Really

0:10

too . We did it a couple in July , and now it's October

0:13

.

0:14

Yeah , we took a season off . This is now

0:16

a new season .

0:18

Welcome to season two dose .

0:21

Dose season dose

0:23

. Yeah , you know

0:25

, I thought we'd kick off the season because

0:27

we're coming up on a new year Just

0:30

started Q4 and

0:32

talk about what holds us accountable

0:34

, also known as business

0:37

coaching .

0:38

Or any coaching .

0:40

Or any coaching Life coaching , personal

0:42

coaching , business coaching .

0:44

Health coaching .

0:45

Health coaching . Do

0:48

we see value ? Do we think it's kind

0:51

of a bunk industry ?

0:53

Sham .

0:54

Yeah , what do we think , Barry ?

0:57

I mean , I

0:59

think , with

1:01

how many coaches we both have in

1:05

different areas . We believe

1:07

in coaching , but

1:10

I also think there's a concept of over coaching

1:12

.

1:13

I kind of coached this year over

1:15

because I felt I was feeling over

1:17

coached .

1:19

Yeah , so why ? I mean , I've

1:21

had coaches for a long time and

1:24

I think at one point in time I convinced you to get a coach .

1:26

I did not . Well , I had

1:28

a coach , Trish

1:30

, who is amazing . He's

1:33

like more of a life coach slash business

1:35

coach . When I first went into

1:38

real estate full time , I

1:40

kind of just knew I needed some accountability and

1:42

I wanted to grow

1:44

a team and not join a team . So I

1:46

knew I needed to pay for that accountability

1:49

from somewhere else . So

1:51

Trish , and then by then

1:54

I don't think I had it . And

1:56

then after Trish I didn't have a business coach until

1:59

you convinced me to get a coach , and

2:02

it wasn't very

2:05

much of a hard sell as it was

2:07

just a model .

2:10

I agree and

2:13

I think having a coach is like a shortcut

2:16

100% . A cheat

2:18

code , because

2:21

they keep you accountable right and they help

2:23

you determine what your priorities

2:25

should be and make sure that you

2:27

keep your word of delivering to those priorities

2:29

. But they help you with all the

2:31

experience that they have had in that

2:33

realm as well , and

2:36

I think that's where the value lies

2:39

. It's like taking a shortcut and

2:42

I originally I mean

2:44

I've always had athletic coaches-

2:47

I mean , you are one

2:49

. And I am one , but I wasn't

2:51

always one . I mean , I started coaching kids

2:53

when I was in middle

2:56

school , maybe high school , and

3:01

I went into coaching high

3:04

school wrestling and then I found

3:06

Jujutsu . But I always had a Jujutsu coach

3:08

until I decided to start coaching

3:10

Jujutsu again . But I finally

3:12

made the decision to get a

3:14

coach in my business after I was talking

3:17

to someone I wanted to grow my business at

3:19

a certain point in time and

3:21

someone asked me like why do you have a Jujutsu coach ? I

3:24

was like because I'm going to learn Jujutsu faster having

3:26

a coach than I would , trying to reinvent

3:28

the wheel and figure it out on my own . And

3:33

that person was like so

3:35

you just want to figure out everything else , everything

3:37

out on your own in your business and take longer to do

3:39

it ? And I was like Touche .

3:42

Ooh .

3:43

Touche .

3:45

I think that's you

3:47

know that my one of my coaches

3:49

is Ryan from SirHand

3:52

and he's a big believer

3:54

.

3:55

Ryan SirHand , ryan SirHand , ryan from SirHand

3:57

.

3:58

Yeah , who also is ?

3:59

Ryan SirHand .

4:01

He is a big believer in

4:03

new agents joining teams and

4:05

I think it's the same reason because your

4:08

team leader is essentially your coach and

4:10

sometimes you hear it like I

4:13

mean , I think there's always

4:15

a pushback for people to get

4:19

a coach Because

4:22

they know that they're going to be uncomfortable .

4:24

Oh yeah , they tell you the hard things , for sure

4:27

.

4:28

I'm really blunt . I'm sure that

4:30

the agents on my team sometimes think

4:32

, like what the fuck ? Why

4:35

is Alitha , you know to be blunt , such a bitch , but

4:37

at the same time I'll sugarcoat things multiple times

4:40

. But then , if you're not getting

4:42

it and I know it's what you need to hear to be successful

4:44

I'm just going to say it .

4:45

So I actually had to talk to my

4:48

athletes the other day at the end of my class

4:50

, and it's a big

4:52

conception

4:54

in jujitsu that

4:56

you should never ask about your rank Like

4:59

, hey , when am I going to get the next stripe ?

5:01

What do I need to do to get my ?

5:02

blue belt . Everyone hears

5:05

this and it might be true at

5:07

some gyms , but that's 100%

5:09

not true with me . So I had to tell my

5:11

students at the end of class the other day , because a lot of people

5:13

are talking on the sidelines

5:16

and essentially

5:18

complaining to other people of , like you

5:22

know , I'm being held back , I don't know what to do , no one will tell me about it . It's

5:25

like you've also never asked , right , and

5:28

you probably haven't asked because you've heard this thing in

5:30

the jujitsu realm of like , if you ask , it's

5:32

just going to take longer . And

5:34

I had to tell my students . I was like , hey

5:37

, so you guys know you

5:39

can always ask me what

5:42

you need to do to progress or ask

5:44

me why you're not progressing . But

5:47

I was like you might not like

5:49

the answer I tell you . You

5:52

know it might be . You know I

5:54

need you to adjust your style . Like , hey , you're a big , strong

5:56

guy , you just muscle everyone around

5:58

. You need to loosen up .

5:59

Yeah , you're not using technique , you're using .

6:02

You might use technique , but you're also using the technique

6:04

against someone who's half your size right

6:06

, and you're just blitzing them . Or

6:09

it's like hey , you just

6:11

haven't been consistent . Or

6:14

at you know , two

6:16

days a week , one week , one day a week , two days a

6:18

week , one day a week hey , it's going to

6:20

take a lot longer Like , and

6:23

you might not like that answer . So

6:26

I think the hard thing about having a coach is

6:28

they push you and

6:31

some people don't like that discomfort of

6:33

being pushed . It makes

6:35

things harder than they want it to be .

6:38

Or the perception is

6:40

that they make things harder than they want to be , and

6:42

sometimes I think that .

6:44

Harder for them to want to be right . Like things

6:46

are hard but

6:49

people get discomfort when they're

6:51

harder than they want it to be . Like

6:55

I want Jujitsu to be challenging to learn . Jujitsu

6:58

is very challenging to learn , but

7:01

it could get to a point where it's like

7:03

, if it's harder

7:05

than I want it to be and my

7:07

preference of and

7:09

radar of what level of what hard is is

7:12

different than a different person's , there's

7:15

that level that it can just be harder

7:17

than you want it .

7:19

Well , I think a good

7:21

coach sees that pushing

7:24

you through the hard makes

7:26

you better . When you come out on the other side and

7:29

an agent recently asked

7:31

you know , because we deal with contracts , we're

7:33

not an attorney review state for basically

7:36

a cheater contract , and

7:38

I said no , you have to make that

7:40

yourself because I could . But

7:43

I want my agents to be really

7:45

, really good agents and

7:47

if I make that themselves for them

7:49

, they just memorize

7:52

as opposed to apply . And I think

7:54

a good coach pushes you through like hey , this

7:56

is not what you want to hear . I

7:58

can give you the easy answer , but

8:01

I need you to push through the discomfort

8:03

because it's going to make you better in

8:06

the long run . Then

8:08

and I think it business ownership is

8:11

you have to hear that because

8:13

business ownership is fucking hard . So

8:16

if you don't have someone to say like listen

8:18

, if you got to push through what's hard because

8:20

on the other side your business will grow , but

8:23

if you don't ever push through hard , it will say

8:26

you know your sales will say the same stagnant

8:28

for years .

8:30

Yeah , 100% .

8:32

So , as far as

8:34

the expense behind business

8:36

coaching , what are

8:38

your thoughts ?

8:40

Investment or expense .

8:42

Yeah , good answer .

8:44

Yeah , In reality it

8:46

comes down to you Like you can have a coach

8:49

all day If you're not an action taker , you just don't

8:51

get a coach . It's not worth it .

8:52

Yeah .

8:53

Like , if you're not willing to do what your coach says

8:55

you should likely do , then

8:58

don't bother getting a coach , just go do it on your own

9:00

. But

9:02

if you are open to learning and open

9:04

to different approaches and people

9:07

with experience , then you'll

9:10

probably see a return on it . Typically

9:12

, if a coach has other clients , their clients

9:15

are getting a return on it .

9:17

Right , I think

9:19

I so the coach that I let go great coach , but

9:22

I outgrew him in

9:24

the sense of the

9:26

value he was offering was

9:28

not necessarily an alignment to

9:30

where the trajectory that I was on

9:32

. So I think that

9:34

, also , knowing that you know once

9:37

, once the investment starts becoming

9:39

an expense , yeah , you have

9:41

to be mindful and you , I'll grow

9:43

coaches all the time . Mm-hmm , I mean

9:45

, I grew my first coach and then yeah

9:47

or you need a different coach

9:50

.

9:50

Right , you might not I Don't

9:52

want to say you're gonna outgrow them , like become better

9:54

than them but you're

9:56

gonna severe down a different path where

9:58

a different coach may be more beneficial

10:00

. Like , right , I'm re-evaluating

10:03

my personal trainer right now , which is

10:05

a coach , because I feel like

10:07

I'm hitting a stagnant

10:09

spot with that coach , but also with

10:11

the entire modality , and I need a change

10:14

of plans .

10:15

Yeah .

10:16

I think so . It's not like I outgrew them , it's

10:18

just my path is changing right

10:20

, or your goal shift , or it's

10:22

not like I got too strong for this personal

10:24

trainer . You can't get me stronger like that is not

10:27

the case right ?

10:28

do you think I Believe

10:31

that there's a difference between an accountability

10:33

partner and a coach , and I think that's that's

10:36

something that people can confuse

10:38

.

10:40

I mean , I think a coach should also

10:42

be an accountability partner . Yeah

10:44

, but you know , accountability partner could just

10:46

be someone that Checks in with you

10:48

, keeps you on track . It could be friends team

10:50

wakes . Teamworker

10:53

like teammates , coworkers

10:55

, teamworkers , team workers

10:57

is not a thing coworkers and it's a

10:59

new thing .

11:00

Yeah , no , I think that's . That's

11:02

a hundred percent . What I think

11:04

is that an accountability partner is just a

11:06

checking in . You know like , hey , let's . I , for

11:09

example , I had a good friend over today just told

11:12

each other accountable to the deep work , she's

11:14

not in my industry . We

11:17

just sat , you know , for two , two hours and we both

11:19

had to , you know , power through some work .

11:20

That's an accountability partner speaking of there's these like

11:23

fascinating services online

11:25

where you can do like Deep

11:27

work sessions with other people virtually

11:29

.

11:29

I need that

11:31

.

11:33

So I've never done one of those

11:35

ones before , but I've done one with

11:37

one of my coaching groups and lifted coaching

11:39

and they like help

11:42

teach life coaches , business

11:44

coaches , other coaches , different communication

11:47

skills , and One

11:49

thing that they used to do is they would do I

11:53

think they call that 90 minutes of awesome , where

11:56

they would literally set a timer . Everyone would

11:58

work on whatever they're doing in their coaching

12:00

world and after 25 minutes Like

12:03

everyone would all say something at the same time they

12:05

would take like a two-minute break and then everyone

12:07

would get back to work .

12:09

Oh .

12:10

It was kind of cool and it was just there was like a like

12:12

a power work session for 90 minutes with

12:14

little time breaks net that everyone took together

12:16

so I mean and you're just sitting

12:18

on zoom with like Everyone

12:20

in zoom , no one's watching because they're doing

12:22

it .

12:23

But that's the thing is , that's

12:25

accountability , right , it's kind of forcing your hand

12:27

to sit down and do the work , but coaching is

12:29

saying , okay , you've done the work . Let's

12:32

kind of navigate what was hard

12:34

, what wasn't , what needs to be

12:36

done really to move the needle and

12:38

why . You know if something's difficult or

12:41

you know yeah . Has if

12:43

you're pushing back , like what we can do to kind of

12:45

coach you through that and part of coaching is

12:47

like one .

12:48

It's , you know , providing

12:51

strategy , right , a lot of great coaches

12:53

can provide actual strategy , but it's also helping

12:55

you learn it in the process

12:57

, right , where someone's not just Dictating

13:00

you like a boss would have hey , you should do it this

13:02

way and this method right . That's

13:04

how it goes . It's like your

13:06

coaches need to push you , so you

13:09

can learn that and understand why , and

13:11

if you need to adapt it , you're

13:13

able to adapt it .

13:15

Yeah , it's , it's teaching you what is the

13:17

phrase ? Teach a man to fish .

13:19

They can catch three .

13:22

That's not the phrase I'm thinking .

13:24

I know , I just made it up .

13:25

It's like I don't think that's a phrase , but

13:28

you know what I mean give a man a rod

13:30

, they will catch a fish .

13:31

Unless they're Perry , then they don't have the patience .

13:34

That is . That is . I'll get that

13:37

embroidered on a pillow . Yeah

13:40

, I think like we're obviously

13:42

both very coach focused . I

13:45

have different coaches . I talked

13:47

on a panel a while back To

13:50

other business owners about kind of coaching

13:52

and leverage and I I

13:55

was pretty blunt about the fact that like it

13:57

takes a village , you know , for

14:00

me to be successful and

14:02

that I have two business coaches , a personal

14:04

trainer At the time I was

14:06

training Jiu Jitsu and boxing as

14:09

well , so that was essentially three athletic trainers

14:11

and

14:14

a business . You know I was

14:17

like it takes a village to hold me

14:19

accountable to all of these different areas

14:21

that I want to grow in , because

14:23

I think by nature

14:26

humans are kind of made to just

14:28

be comfortable , right , like we're

14:30

made to survive and once we can kind of just let our guard

14:32

down and , yeah , be complacent

14:34

. So if you want to grow

14:36

, you have to . Now , looking at the monetary

14:39

investment , I was , you know I

14:42

was investing a lot in growing my

14:44

business and myself , but I wouldn't

14:46

, I wouldn't be

14:48

as successful as I am

14:50

today had I not invested all of that

14:52

money in the beginning . And

14:55

now I can kind of like go back

14:57

between cultures .

14:59

I remember when I got my first business

15:01

coach for the gym they had like an application

15:03

and I 100% lied how much

15:06

my gym made so I didn't get denied or

15:08

put into the cheaper coaching

15:10

program Because they had like a couple of different tiers of coaching

15:12

programs and I was like I knew the tier that

15:14

I wanted and I was like they're going to see

15:16

my gross revenue number and be

15:19

like , hey , maybe we should start over the basic

15:21

one and I was like we'll just fudge that number

15:23

a little bit .

15:24

You lied yourself . You lied your way to coaching 100%

15:26

and it worked great .

15:27

Tim was the best coach ever . I mean , I've had

15:29

a lot of great coaches , but Tim Crater

15:31

shout out .

15:32

Yeah , that's awesome , Change my life , that's

15:35

. I mean , that's the thing I think . I like to think of

15:37

a business coach as a business therapist , Like

15:40

your therapist is

15:42

, and if you know , if you have , if you're an

15:44

entrepreneur without a therapist , like you're

15:46

doing it wrong because it's very isolating

15:49

, just an isolating industry

15:51

, to be a business owner . I think .

15:52

Yeah , or you need . You at least

15:54

need other business owners that you can talk to

15:57

.

15:58

Yeah , but sometimes they've got their own shit going on that

16:00

they're really not looking at it , especially if they're in the

16:02

same industry . They're not looking at it from an unbiased

16:04

perspective because they're essentially

16:07

competing against you . So but

16:09

I think a business coach is a therapist

16:11

for your business .

16:12

Yeah .

16:13

Because they're there to you know kind of listen

16:15

, through the lens of not being bias

16:17

, of having had experience

16:20

and listening to other people navigate issues

16:22

very similar to a personal therapist

16:24

.

16:24

Yeah .

16:25

So I think coaching is

16:28

almost a requirement to be a

16:30

team leader and a business owner

16:32

.

16:32

You should buy the domain businesstherapycom .

16:35

Done , I will . Are

16:38

we competing to buy domains ? This

16:41

is , this is date night , y'all . We're

16:43

just this is what we do . But

16:47

yeah , so that's my , my thought on business

16:49

coaching . I also think like sitting down

16:52

and kind of re-evaluating that relationship

16:54

at the end of every year , making

16:56

sure that you know you're on the same , they're

16:58

holding you accountable to what you need and

17:02

where you want to get to , and and

17:04

the you know the trajectory

17:06

that you're on . I think is important . What

17:09

honey ?

17:10

It's 19 grand .

17:14

That's how much that that domain is .

17:15

Yeah .

17:17

Oh my god , that's might be the most extensive domain

17:19

I've ever come across 19

17:21

grand .

17:23

I mean it might be negotiable . At least that's what

17:25

it says on a name

17:27

sheet .

17:28

Everything's negotiable , sweetie .

17:31

I don't know , who knows , they might really want 19

17:33

grand , so it might not be .

17:34

Well , you can still , you know , attempt

17:37

to negotiate .

17:38

Maybe if I kidnapped their dog and hold it hostage

17:40

. Oh my god , that's that

17:42

was grim . Sorry , I don't know where that came from . I

17:45

was just listening to a podcast

17:47

at Huberman with Chris Voss , the negotiator

17:50

guy that was getting people out of like war

17:53

torn countries and negotiating kidnapping

17:55

, so it's the first thing that came to my mind .

17:56

Oh , all right . Okay , Sounds like a pleasant

17:59

little , you know relaxing drive home

18:01

from the gym . But that's my thought

18:03

on coaching . I really just think that it

18:05

takes a village to be successful . I think

18:07

that the perceptions

18:09

is not actually reality when it comes to

18:11

business ownership , those business owners

18:14

that are wildly successful . It didn't

18:16

happen overnight and it didn't happen alone

18:18

. That's my thought . What

18:21

are your final thoughts on business coaching ?

18:24

What if it wasn't a business ? What if you didn't own a

18:26

business ? Where would your first investment

18:28

of a coach be ? You're not an honest donor

18:31

Because there's other like you get career coaches just

18:33

to help coach you through your career . So

18:36

yours would be health , like nutrition , fitness , a

18:38

general health coach , like at wild health that

18:40

we do , or what kind of coach . Who

18:42

would be your first coach ? You have to get rid of all of your coaches

18:45

and you can hire one back . Which one would

18:47

you hire back ?

18:49

That's not related to my business .

18:51

Correct .

18:53

My personal trainer .

18:55

He's a good guy .

18:56

Because without health , what is

18:58

the point ?

18:59

Health is wealth , as you say .

19:01

Health is wealth . There's two

19:03

things that are , just you know , finite

19:06

your health .

19:07

And that is the saying . All the other sayings I had earlier

19:09

today are not . They're not real . I made

19:11

all those up , but that one is a real saying

19:13

.

19:13

Now that they're recorded . But now that I've said it , they're

19:15

saying they're saying yeah , yeah , I would

19:18

say my personal trainer .

19:19

Cool .

19:20

You .

19:24

Jiu-Jitsu coach .

19:26

That's technically related to your business

19:28

, though .

19:31

The , not the jiu-jitsu-y side of things

19:33

, the doing the jiu-jitsu .

19:35

Okay , okay , all right Okay

19:38

.

19:38

Because that's like my personal

19:41

coach . If that isn't the choice , it would be a personal

19:43

trainer .

19:44

Here's what I will say too . If you're you know , if

19:46

you're hiring a coach or you have a coach and you're

19:48

kind of wondering if it's a good fit , I

19:50

, similarly to a therapist

19:52

, I don't think it's a

19:55

bad thing to kind of , you know , interview

19:57

or work with a couple and realize , hey

19:59

, that this isn't a good fit . But

20:02

if you feel energized when

20:04

you get off the call because sometimes

20:06

, going into the call , if you know like you're struggling

20:08

with your business , it's not always like , you're

20:10

not always like , oh , thank God , I have a call with

20:12

my coach Sometimes you're like , oh God , I know

20:15

they're gonna ask about this . But if you

20:17

feel energized when you get off the call

20:19

, then that's probably a good

20:21

fit .

20:23

I agree . Yeah , there are a lot

20:25

of calls where my coach gave me homework

20:27

and I came back to that and I

20:29

didn't do the homework .

20:31

You're such a pleaser too . I bet that can .

20:33

Or it wasn't like I did the homework , but I didn't

20:35

do it to their full expectation

20:37

. I was like they haven't like one time

20:40

and I was like I'm never doing that again .

20:41

And then Perry didn't sleep for four days . 100%

20:45

, you'll be fine .

20:47

I mean a good business coach . That is not a pleaser

20:50

, that's an achiever function of me .

20:52

A high achiever , which some will say

20:54

is rooted in , you know , pleasing

20:57

mentality .

20:59

I like to please you , my wife , you're the only one I care

21:01

about , pleasing .

21:02

Oh boy Anyway .

21:04

Mentally and emotionally .

21:06

Perry is a very high achiever in the

21:08

sense of he will need a

21:10

multiple people's permission to fail

21:12

in order . But I also think a good coach

21:15

with that said , you know why didn't

21:17

you do your homework ? Is it looks at things

21:19

from a holistic perspective too . Right Like

21:21

a good business coach is not the hustle culture

21:23

of like you have to do this and if you don't you

21:26

fail . A good coach is gonna

21:28

say , okay , what is going on outside of

21:30

your business ? Because ultimately , your

21:32

personal life , it should really

21:34

be the number one priority . And

21:36

if you know , if you are

21:39

putting something on for your business to decide

21:41

to focus on family or your mental

21:43

health or whatever , a good coach will

21:46

say that's a good decision .

21:47

If you find a business coach that all they're doing

21:49

is coaching you on your business and not coaching you

21:51

how to grow yourself , you should probably reevaluate

21:53

100% , 100%

21:55

. Like

21:58

I remember Tim . Tim was like you

22:00

know , we got into it . We raised

22:02

our membership prices by a lot

22:04

. They were just crazy cheap

22:06

that we would never make money as an Academy . We

22:08

brought them up to industry standards

22:11

, stuff like that . You know how to get through my mindset

22:13

of you know I'm actually worth that amount . And then

22:15

he asked me it's like how good are you at sales ? And

22:18

I was like I'm

22:21

okay . And then he was like

22:23

what's your sales

22:25

percentage ? And of course , like I don't know my numbers

22:28

, he's like , okay , let's go figure out your numbers and stuff . And

22:30

as it did that , he's like have you ever done any training

22:32

on sales ? And I was like no

22:34

. He's like do you think selling

22:37

is an important part of your business ? I was like yes

22:39

. He's like well , you

22:41

train Jiu-Jitsu . You should train your sales

22:43

as well . And I was like that's a good point . So

22:45

he actually sent me Jordan Belfort's entire sales

22:47

course . It was amazing .

22:48

Oh , for

22:51

free .

22:51

For free . I still have it .

22:53

Oh , I should see that I should take a gander

22:56

.

22:56

You could just watch the Wolf of Wall Street in action

22:58

. I've seen it . It's actually really good . It's called

23:00

straight line selling . It's a fantastic course .

23:04

Oh yeah , I'll take a look .

23:06

But it was like it was one of those things , like I had to grow my own

23:08

communication skills because if I like

23:12

, it's a huge part of the business and

23:15

it's on you as an individual

23:17

skill , right , it's not like a business

23:19

strategy thing .

23:20

Right , I have a real estate has

23:22

comes with a lot of you know scripts , right

23:24

, like your buyer script or seller super , I mean all

23:27

sales does . And when I teach

23:29

because when I teach agents in the productivity

23:31

program , which is , you know , keller

23:33

Williams navigates helps agents navigate

23:36

their first five transactions with essentially

23:38

a you know a team I

23:42

have them write their own scripts . We

23:44

don't , we don't do like , at least

23:46

I don't teach scripts that are , like you

23:49

know , from Keller Williams or from like

23:51

a you know Tom Ferry coaching or anything

23:53

, Because I think it makes memorizing

23:57

a script , does not make an authentic

23:59

relationship .

24:00

But I think you can study them . This is super

24:02

sidetracked , but I think it's really good to

24:04

like when we do our script practice . At our

24:06

Academy I

24:08

we practice our script

24:11

verbatim .

24:12

But if that's not , how wait , wait , wait .

24:14

but that's not how they execute it . But I want them

24:16

to know like , hey , here's why we

24:19

have the flow that we have and why it followed

24:21

this , and here are some important phrases

24:24

that we say and why we say them . Now

24:26

you can adapt that to how you want to be , but

24:28

however you're doing it , you should have a reason

24:30

why .

24:31

Especially if it's a similar conversation at a number

24:34

of times . It's so much less salesy

24:36

and more relationship , right when , if you're memorizing

24:39

a script and defaulting , you know do I

24:41

that it's . It's very different , because

24:44

we're not selling a membership , we're selling

24:46

essentially a lifestyle .

24:48

Yeah , but you don't do cold call real estate and a lot of people

24:50

do .

24:51

No , I don't cold call .

24:53

I know , but that's what I'm saying Like there are scenarios like

24:55

cold calling , where you do want to have a fairly

24:57

standardized script going

24:59

in , so at least you have a game plan , right ?

25:01

Well , if you are listening to this podcast and

25:03

then real estate and don't want a cold call . And

25:05

you're and you want to learn how . Dm

25:08

me , because I will teach you how to build a very successful

25:10

business .

25:11

But like , our sales scripts aren't sales scripts , but

25:13

it's our discovery call process Like , hey

25:15

, here's why we're asking the questions that

25:17

we ask on our discovery call

25:20

. I'm not going to leave it up to you as an employee

25:22

that's going to give your script that's never been tested

25:24

Right . Here's how we do it . You can

25:26

say the questions how you want to say them and adapt

25:29

the flow as you are , but this is why

25:31

, and you have to understand that- that makes

25:33

sense .

25:34

Let's talk about .

25:35

This is turning into a much longer pocket .

25:37

I know , let's talk about life

25:39

coaches because I

25:42

know , you know , that I have opinions

25:44

on some coaching styles

25:47

, trauma bonding being one of them

25:49

. I think there are a lot of coaching organizations

25:51

that I maybe

25:53

because I believe that there is a rule

25:55

for licensed therapists , especially

25:59

during , like you know , I think there's

26:02

a lot of larger coaching groups that are like

26:04

oh , come share your life's trauma

26:06

. Not , you know , not that

26:08

I'm going to name Tony Robbins or anything , but , like

26:10

you know , let's all stand

26:12

up and get on the mic and explain what

26:15

happened when you were five and let's walk

26:17

on coals and overcome it . I think that

26:19

is complete , to be blunt , bullshit

26:22

, coaching . I think that my

26:25

opinions are it's dangerous

26:27

and that kind of life coaching

26:29

is an under regulated

26:32

industry to

26:34

the point of putting people at

26:36

risk . Those

26:39

are my thoughts .

26:40

I don't know , I don't share them , but I mean

26:42

I think I do to an extent

26:46

. I

26:54

think most of those happen . The trauma bonding

26:56

you're talking about group life coaching , like

26:58

life coaching conferences , because

27:00

trauma bonding doesn't happen . I mean it can

27:02

happen but in a singular

27:05

, one-on-one session with a coach , right like the kind of coaches

27:07

we have .

27:07

yeah .

27:08

Actually , what needs to happen is , when you're a coach , you

27:10

need to do the opposite of trauma bond

27:12

, and this is actually something I've

27:14

covered in the enlyptic course of like as

27:17

a coach , trying

27:19

if you start to trauma bond with one of

27:21

your clients . Right , yeah , that's

27:24

super important Because you need to be able to turn that shit

27:26

off .

27:27

Especially in , I think especially in the health and wellness

27:29

space , where people are like sometimes just looking

27:31

for like an answer or

27:33

a cure . Yeah , I think that's super

27:35

important , Because I think so for those

27:38

that are listening that don't know what trauma

27:40

bonding is . It's essentially getting

27:42

people to a level of feeling

27:44

super vulnerable together so

27:46

they then feel like their success

27:49

is bonded

27:51

. So it's

27:53

kind of almost a sales tactic

27:55

for some of these coaching companies

27:58

or whatever to kind of keep you coming back because

28:00

you think that , like in order to whatever .

28:02

There's another definition of it , though . If

28:04

you're my coaching client and

28:07

you tell me some sort of traumatic

28:09

event and I start bonding with you over it , that

28:11

compromises my ability to coach you , right

28:13

, yeah . Right , I

28:15

don't know about that , but it's when people create

28:18

connection you lose . I

28:20

actually take on your trauma as my own and

28:24

that's what you want to avoid as a coach .

28:25

Right , yeah , that's an example .

28:28

Like I need to understand it . But from a coach like Tony Robinson on stage

28:30

, he needs to not trauma

28:33

. Bond with everyone .

28:34

Right , exactly , exactly . I

28:36

also think that there are life

28:38

coaches that have no

28:41

business being coaches because they've actually

28:43

never had a business . I've

28:46

noticed that a lot is popular

28:48

in coaching and I think that's why people

28:51

are so hesitant in hiring coaching because

28:53

it's so under-regulated that

28:55

my first

28:58

coach , trish , went to NYU

29:00

for professional coaching . She has

29:02

a degree in how to be a business coach and

29:05

life coaching , but I think it's

29:08

so under-regulated . I've seen people

29:10

just basically go bankrupt

29:12

because they don't actually know how to run a business and they're

29:14

like well , fuck it , I'll become a coach , and

29:16

I think that that's why the industry gets such a bad

29:18

rap . Is that ?

29:20

it's . It's like real estate , it's an easy certification to get

29:22

and you don't even need one because there's

29:24

enough places out there that are like we're the

29:27

life coaching certification . But you

29:29

just created a program and said you're , it's

29:31

not a I mean , I

29:34

guess that's what all industries are and just says , hey , I'm

29:36

the de facto person that certifies

29:38

life coaches . You should believe that .

29:40

Right , but I think the fact that

29:42

there is no board certification or

29:44

whatever I could just go to LinkedIn and say

29:47

that I'm a life coach , but that to be said what

29:49

is a board certification

29:51

?

29:51

At some point in time , someone says , hey , I'm

29:53

qualified to say that you're

29:56

qualified . It's

29:59

like what is that ? Even ?

30:00

I want a business coach . I mean , I have so business

30:02

coaches , one . I've grown a very

30:05

this is one of the most successful agents in

30:07

the world . Two , my systems

30:09

and process coach has

30:11

worked at a brokerage helping

30:14

agents build their systems and processes .

30:16

They have proven success in what they're coaching

30:18

. That's the biggest thing To find someone with a proven track

30:20

record .

30:21

Right .

30:22

And if their coaching works for you , great . If it's not

30:24

working for you , ditch it , find a different one .

30:26

Yeah , but if they've never actually led

30:29

a successful business or team , maybe

30:31

interview someone else . Yeah

30:34

, also , I mean , in Wisconsin

30:36

we can look people up on C-CAP . If they've got

30:38

like a track record of

30:40

credit card theft or something , maybe find

30:42

somebody else , because , again , it is under-regulated

30:45

. At least in real estate you have to

30:47

be state certified and there's background checks and such

30:49

. That's true , it's still the

30:51

barrier to entry is low . But yeah , so

30:54

those are my thoughts on I think there's

30:56

a fine line between an okay

31:00

coach and a really great coach . But

31:04

I obviously spend a lot of money on

31:06

coaching and I pay for a coach

31:09

that the agents on my team also have

31:11

access to . So I truly , truly

31:13

believe in coaching . Yeah , so

31:15

yeah , and you do too . You

31:17

have a coach that some of

31:19

your employees have access to as well .

31:21

Yeah , I have a coach specific for

31:23

my managers .

31:25

Yeah , so I mean .

31:27

To teach them how to be managers .

31:29

I don't think had I never invested

31:32

that initial I mean it's expensive

31:34

, thousands of dollars in coaching

31:37

, I wouldn't have netted so

31:39

much more . That's like

31:41

you said , it's an investment . So

31:44

all right , here's to coaching

31:46

.

31:47

Here's to coaching .

31:48

Here's to an experienced coach

31:50

.

31:51

Do your research .

31:52

Yeah , all right , that's

31:55

all we have for .

31:56

Follow your heart .

31:58

Our welcome back season two episode .

32:01

See you next time .