Frame 8: Muffs and guffs. Something rotten is hanging over today's contest and it's not just the persistent accusations of match-fixing. There is a very actual and real odour pervading the whole thing, but no one is prepared to admit who dealt it. So that mystery will have to keep you entertained, because there's very little going on on the snooker board to give you any joy and even if there was, only Commentator 2 seems anywhere near capable of describing it. All the Mes are weary after a long drive back from Nottingham in the dead of night, but that can be no excuse in a professional sport. It might be worth hanging around for the metaphysical recriminations at the end, or if you just want to know who has won. But will we find out who guffed? When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.