0:00

making MG in the morning brought to

0:02

you by sports bed nobody does it

0:04

easier than sports bed something that went

0:07

bonkers on the show yesterday

0:09

morning when one member of the

0:11

team made the outrageous claim that

0:14

she puts avocado on

0:16

her burgers mmm delicious

0:19

unbelievable I'm Australian I'm Australian you think

0:22

you know someone and then you just

0:24

go and have a shower and you

0:26

come why

0:30

why she's such a sensible girl yeah

0:34

MG you followed it up if you've done

0:36

this once again on threads that's where you

0:38

go to sort out the

0:40

big issues you put this up did

0:43

you not as one of your what

0:45

do you call a thread

0:47

yeah a poll a poll a poll

0:49

I'd said should you put an avocado

0:51

on and the results

0:53

were in what happened 70% say

0:56

no avocado on a burger

0:58

thank you agree with cat I think yeah I

1:00

think you're lucky to get 30% what what do

1:02

you holes

1:07

are always wrong we know that with

1:09

elections when you when you one miss mudgy

1:17

thank well done Australia and

1:19

well done threads for sorting

1:22

that out for us mission

1:25

accomplished while we're talking food it's

1:27

the big story of the day guys apparently

1:30

the cavemen were vegans

1:33

what absolute

1:35

bombshell vegans who

1:38

knew there they are in all

1:40

their in all their rock art they're killing

1:42

bisons and stuff no no

1:45

apparently there's one to nor and a

1:48

Brussels sprout this

1:52

is new figures I've got

1:54

the deep place far away analysis of bones

1:56

and teeth found in a cave in Morocco

1:58

that was inhabited about 15,000

2:01

years ago has revealed that the majority

2:03

of people during the stone age diet

2:05

ate plants 80% of their diet with

2:09

Do you know how disappointing that is to think

2:12

that some of our ancestors may have

2:15

died on a celery hunt? It

2:19

doesn't feel you know what it

2:21

is. I reckon I'll tell you

2:23

exactly what it was lazy hunt together as Guys,

2:26

let's go out get a mammoth You

2:30

know what we could just gnaw on

2:32

some corn. I guess the parsley What

2:35

you're saying is the men were doing nothing. Yeah, correct

2:40

What have you gathered all right, I'll eat that and

2:43

sleep in Let

2:46

down again by the men in your life

2:48

girls who are asleep Will

2:51

hi and just quickly while we're at it Talking

2:54

about food. This is stories making me

2:57

laugh today Um, there was a road

2:59

rage incident in Florida 46 man. We're

3:01

six young man has been arrested For

3:05

basically in a road rage incident for

3:07

hurling pasta on another driver So,

3:12

I'm not joking he held pasta with

3:14

sauce out the window got him Found

3:17

food stains on his sleeve after

3:21

the pasta pelting Um,

3:24

this is it. This is a terrible road

3:26

rage incident. In fact, I think we've actually

3:28

got Audio

3:30

of the incident Dante

3:34

mate you silly dickhead. What's wrong

3:36

with you? You

3:39

almost smashed into my corona Get

3:41

it over here. I'm gonna talk to a lady

3:44

you a new one. Yes, you big can aloney

3:53

You Yes

3:58

Time to turn her attention. Into

4:00

the world of the Animal Kingdom,

4:02

which we like to do on

4:04

this program. Congratulations to take Kagan

4:06

pied a bag himself a me

4:08

and on a barrel. Up

4:12

there as a Northern territory and want

4:14

us to be one of the greatest

4:16

to his campaign's am a lords and

4:18

may know about scientists. Cease was tagged.

4:21

Cried. And as to Spain or

4:23

is wasn't a matte. No.

4:25

Uneasy guys side and of whoever

4:27

caught it gets the tag and

4:29

the tax with a million dollars

4:31

nine year old is one of

4:33

size lies millionaires have to hooking

4:36

and on Sunday morning a from

4:38

Catherine. A local from the

4:40

Northern Territory toward a city seven made

4:42

a barren. Pam.

4:45

Ah believable. This is one of the

4:48

great stories and want a character a

4:50

turn out to be lives as of

4:52

the into a are exploiting. ah what

4:54

made to Beg me and all about

4:56

Soil of Freaked in Atlanta and then

4:59

exacerbates. We rang dad and semicolon and

5:01

sang bass most. As I

5:03

get an idea and definitely we gotta we gotta

5:05

assistance and with today last month is pretty hard

5:08

job for us and a mile and money but

5:10

now with a million dollars of the family Stunning

5:12

Advani by a lot of people. I used to

5:14

be friends is an additional friends it anymore that

5:16

one And I mean as. Far

5:22

back as I do. When. My. Mom

5:25

I went on for way for the he

5:27

went on for Duke of a Gloss and

5:29

that he went up for a week. The because

5:31

of this game violence as a midsummer user

5:33

unbelievable on through some can find incest would

5:35

be like. I'm a fan of catch and

5:37

Release but of this occasion. Services

5:40

contract fish are being released.

5:44

His clothes voices and a fussy

5:47

so. We. Must Renaissance Reason I:

5:49

you easily pass this one. Marries

5:52

that had used to be.on figure of

5:55

the with fish really thought I was

5:57

going to Monaco and the diversity. Right

6:02

now is let her brewing on idea that

6:04

brought what do you sense it with a

6:06

Louis Vuitton fishing rod of the system in

6:08

a dorm and sings as a success and

6:10

this is one of the all time great

6:12

stories and what still up there he said

6:14

what this is still since as long as.

6:17

They release and additional there's one hundred

6:19

and three other read: Texas that I

6:21

was ten thousand dollars. Zidane swimming

6:23

around something or. Moon

6:26

is last year up there with

6:28

a stick of dynamite. The

6:31

success of us are two thousand or

6:33

it's a blessing trip going on. For

6:37

weeks ago waited to hoover

6:39

were without question remember that

6:41

next time you're buying Year

6:43

Zero Orange Rothys. Rather

6:47

than to what they getting More expensive

6:49

these days but not a million bucks

6:51

or, well.everyone, Great stories. Go

6:58

home prices. Of

7:00

is your Asean. Cassidy

7:03

rubber. Thirties

7:05

seemed inevitable. been dragging on for about

7:08

a month. will take so much. Good.

7:11

Question me, he's really good question or things when

7:13

quite cruel to be honest and wind which is

7:15

they don't miss it, I just and Dimitris front

7:17

of not one. But. Two board meetings,

7:19

his own views uncertain as us to the

7:21

second board meeting. But basically

7:23

using wisdom a wolf? nothing for a couple

7:25

of weeks. I. I'm. Apparently.

7:28

This is is worthy in a coma or this

7:30

morning us and have a good he wrote a

7:32

book and to give me for according the the

7:34

right of it. Apparently. Russell Crowe.

7:37

before the second board meeting a slice

7:39

and dice and Demetrio text message saying.

7:41

Of. Got you back So. I don't

7:44

know whether Russell's losing a bit of of power

7:46

cell Sydney or was happening the but this whole

7:48

this whole she most who. Hasn't been good

7:50

for the says to the revelers. I

7:52

have no with been home been is there

7:55

interim coach for the Big The Big to

7:57

Mickey. and all ellison is is that

7:59

white been We'll be coming back to

8:01

the Rabados as of next year, the 74 year

8:03

old Wayne Bennett, his contract is up at the

8:05

Dolphins. He is the new player chasing

8:07

and you can put your house on that Wayne Bennett

8:10

will be coaching the South Sydney Rabados as of next year,

8:12

probably on a two or three year deal, which will

8:14

be his last I would have imagined. What

8:17

do they want from the rest of the season, mate? What's

8:19

the result for them? Unfortunately for the

8:22

Panthers, they play them tomorrow night. So

8:25

now what happens when the coach gets back to the... Bad

8:27

timing, absolutely. They're about to fire a guy. But

8:30

look, he's a good Blake Jason Demetra as well coaches

8:32

are who get sacked. You'd never like to see it,

8:34

but the results of the results, South are coming last,

8:37

something you have to give. They just went the wrong way

8:39

about it. That's the only thing. Other

8:41

sport, Mickie, you love this one, Mike Tyson and

8:43

Jake Paul. Well their fight that happens on July

8:46

20, guess what? It's

8:48

been sanctioned as a professional fight.

8:51

How can that be in the

8:53

heavyweight division eight rounds of two

8:55

minutes and you're calling that a

8:57

heavyweight fight? With 14 ounce gloves.

9:00

With 14 ounce gloves, you're just

9:02

making a mockery of your own

9:04

sport. It's a disgrace. Will

9:07

you watch it? Yeah.

9:12

Well, because I might, there's just an outside

9:14

chance, I might see an influencer get the

9:16

shit beatin' out of him. And

9:18

that's enough of a lure for me to go.

9:22

For every other heavyweight boxer out

9:24

there who trains hard,

9:26

who works hard, who's a great

9:28

devotee of the sport, and

9:31

these blokes are going to go to an AT&T arena with

9:33

80,000 people. It's

9:36

a sideshow. When

9:39

did you say to me earlier that it's the

9:41

greatest age difference by two boxers in the history

9:43

of the sport? Yeah, the biggest age gap between

9:45

two fighters in the history of professional boxing, 57

9:48

years of age, Tyson, 27 years of

9:50

age, Paul, 30 years, an age gap. And

9:52

you might be talking about this tonight on the front

9:54

bar with maybe Anthony Rocker. Anthony

9:57

Rocker, Sydney Swans star, former Sydney

9:59

Swans star. Star and Collingwood Star of course

10:01

Anthony Rocker will be on front bar tonight Channel 7

10:03

8 30. One

10:06

year after takeoff Bonsa is no longer

10:08

giving a big thumbs up. The entire

10:10

fleet repossessed on the tarmac this morning

10:12

as passengers waited at the gate in

10:14

Melbourne. I just wanted to get home.

10:16

Got to cancel work and plans at home.

10:19

I've got no nothing from Bonsa.

10:21

Discussions are underway regarding the ongoing

10:24

viability of the business. There

10:26

it is huge news involving the

10:28

cut price operator in aviation terms.

10:30

What do we need to know?

10:32

What's the latest please Tarsh? Absolute

10:34

chaos as we just heard there

10:36

with Bonsa cancelling all its flights,

10:39

grounding its entire fleet, pending

10:41

discussions on voluntary administration and whether

10:44

they can continue to operate. Wow

10:47

okay so at least till the end

10:49

of the week when you say the

10:51

entire fleet? I think there was only

10:54

like four in the footage wasn't there?

10:56

Yeah Shazza, Gather, and Gather.

10:58

Let's be honest in aviation terms they

11:00

were lemons. I did

11:03

once on the tarmac so everyone have to get out and

11:05

push. With

11:09

the luggage they just used to put them on roof racks. Once

11:15

just to get it off the pilot had to give

11:17

it more choke. Oh come on mate.

11:20

And I saw one. I did see one at the terminal

11:22

where someone had written wash me. Had

11:28

a coat hanger for an aerial. You know what I'm

11:30

saying? There's a muffler dragging

11:32

along the tarmac as it was trying to

11:35

take off but anyway the door was a

11:37

different colour. You know what I'm talking about.

11:39

A few different panels. Anyway

11:42

hopefully they'll be back after

11:44

Thursday and I believe they're still

11:46

advertising. Oh okay. Yeah

11:48

welcome to Bonser Airlines Cobba where we promise

11:50

that when you turn up at the airport we'll make sure your

11:53

flight has been delayed for low bounds at a minimum of three

11:55

days if you're lucky. Change in a part you're going to one

11:57

at a whole other airport and then once we do get you

11:59

on the plane. We'll sit you at the gate

12:01

for a couple more hours, not explaining what the f***

12:03

is going on. Long laugh and we'll have you in the

12:05

air on route to your destination via some other backwater joint.

12:08

All while having the living shit kicked out of the

12:10

back of your seat. There's another seat in front of

12:12

you, even though it has some gold recline ability. Because

12:15

when it's placed twice as easy to sleep on the

12:17

plane, you'll actually be pinned between the two of them.

12:19

And if any of these things off, your luggage will

12:21

disappear in our warehouse. We have ground staff and administrators

12:23

all rifled through every bag point, anything of value. But

12:26

don't worry, she's all bonzer, mate. Wow.

12:32

Question without notice, girls. And

12:34

I want an honest answer to the following. Would

12:36

you use a urinal designed

12:39

for women? So,

12:42

this has been mooted. It's up on

12:44

blogs. This invention by

12:46

two British inventors claims to be six

12:48

times quicker to use than

12:51

a regular toilet. And

12:53

they're going to use it obviously or wean

12:55

it in at

12:57

festivals. Where in the

13:00

past, I think we talked about this, they've

13:02

had a sheepy, haven't they? What's the sheepy,

13:04

girls? What was that technology? It's a device

13:06

that you literally put on your

13:08

nether regions. And then it politely

13:10

goes in a direction away from

13:12

you, essentially, as a slightest way

13:14

to put it. Direct the stream

13:17

away from your person in

13:19

a way that makes it easier to navigate

13:21

your way. Better

13:23

than a portal, right? Yes. I

13:27

don't think the She-We really took off, did it? No. No.

13:31

This looks good. This

13:34

looks fantastic. So, describe it to

13:36

us. Do you know what we're talking about,

13:38

girls? What did you say? It looks like a bit

13:40

of a saddle you sit on. It looks like you're

13:42

riding a pony, but it's like

13:44

a saddle that collects. Because our biggest problem is

13:46

splashback, if you're ever going to have to be

13:48

in this situation. This is so everything to talk

13:51

about. Not the same as us, though. No.

13:56

No, you need mudflaps or something to...

14:00

You know what I'm saying? Because

14:05

let's just say there's a bit

14:07

of power behind the stream ladies.

14:10

You really get it out there. Well

14:12

after 6 hours of waiting for the

14:14

concert, the men's got pretty well too.

14:16

How good was the Taylor Swift concert?

14:19

I've never had it so easy. The

14:22

MCG's, that's where I saw it, usually

14:25

the men's toilets full is a good bang. It

14:27

went in for me, I've got to tell you.

14:31

It was great. Would you give this a run? No.

14:34

Let's start. No? Tash?

14:37

I would. Because if it cuts

14:39

down line time, because that's the biggest problem. Six

14:41

times quicker. Six times quicker. And because

14:43

your head's up the top and it's a solo thing,

14:45

you can't have three women going in at the same time

14:47

and chatting. I think we've worked out what

14:50

it's like. Tash? That's

14:52

the other thing that would speed women's behaviour

14:54

up at the toilet. No talking. What

14:58

if it was like a library and

15:00

you just said, shh, and we

15:02

just got in there. Here's an

15:04

idea. Maybe we don't go there

15:06

with six of your friends. Why

15:09

do you have to go together? Like I never go, have

15:11

you ever seen, MG, have you ever gone to your mates,

15:13

I'm just going to the bathroom, would you care to join

15:15

me? Yeah why don't you come with me?

15:18

I'm a little mad at it and powder up. It's

15:20

not happening. But then you're running to other people

15:23

in the line and then you just have a chat about some

15:25

of them. When you're busting

15:28

though. I

15:30

want to see you test drive

15:32

one of those. I don't want to say that but

15:35

I would like you to test them. I

15:37

tell you what, in the women's urinal don't

15:39

you reckon the urinal cakes will smell better

15:41

too? Definitely. Let's

15:44

sting your eyes. We'd

15:47

be like pot puri. Friend Japan.

15:51

Hey ladies you might be able to use a

15:53

urinal but come back and talk to me when

15:56

you can write your own name. the

16:00

battle of the queen as the guys

16:02

take off the swap. Awesome! This

16:15

is one battle you won't want to miss. Oh

16:18

yeah. This is gonna be on,

16:20

it's gonna be a ding dong.

16:22

This will be the best battle of the bridge ever. Second

16:25

place, third, no love lost per train

16:27

these teams. There's a bit of niggle

16:30

in the lead up and it's gonna go

16:32

down to the wire. Joining us now is

16:34

in my opinion the greatest player in the

16:36

league right now. He's the all Australian captain

16:39

as we speak. He's one

16:42

of those players who transcends their

16:44

own club. Any fan anywhere would love

16:46

to have him on their team. It's

16:48

the G.W. It's captain Toby Green, how are you

16:50

Toby? Hey! Hey boys, thanks for

16:52

the kind words Mick. How are you going? I'm

16:55

going really good mate. How are you feeling

16:57

in the lead up to what is gonna

16:59

be the most anticipated battle of the bridge

17:01

so far? No,

17:03

good, good. Yeah, excited. Probably

17:06

is the biggest one so far and

17:08

both teams are flying at the moment.

17:10

So yeah, there's lots on the

17:12

line and should be a cracking day. Hopefully the

17:14

weather holds out a bit but we'll wait and

17:16

see. Absolutely,

17:18

absolutely. Tov, you've come a

17:20

long way mate since Kevin Sheedy days. You're one

17:22

of the inaugural G.W. West members. How's

17:25

things changed since that first year in the 2011 AFL Draft

17:27

to now in 2024? What's

17:30

been the biggest turning point do you

17:32

think for the G.W. West Giants? Oh,

17:36

well lots has changed. There's

17:39

not 30 18 year olds running

17:41

around breakfast point anymore. The

17:47

kids who come in now, they're

17:49

a lot more structured and they're

17:51

coming into a professional environment where they know what

17:53

to record whereas as there's a bit more of

17:55

a school camp and just have a bit of

17:57

fun on the weekend. It's

18:00

been for the better I think. It

18:05

has indeed. You've got a cracking coach out

18:08

there at the moment. At

18:10

the moment you're the flag favourite so I know

18:12

you don't like that kind of talk but you're

18:15

just going to have to cop it because it's

18:17

like a military operation out there. Hijito, is this

18:19

your team MG? It'd be your team wouldn't it?

18:22

Have you got it? Come on. You two. Two

18:25

of the biggest names out in the

18:27

western suburbs. Surely you've got paths or

18:29

surely they've come at you to support

18:31

the GWS. Well my young

18:34

bloke Mav who's basically trying

18:36

to make his own mark in rugby league went to a GWS

18:38

Giants game about three weeks ago. He said dad it was awesome.

18:40

I said yeah I've been to a few games at the home

18:42

bush. It's a fantastic atmosphere. I think

18:44

the thing about AFL, Mickie, is that when

18:46

you go to a live game you see a lot more off

18:49

the ball than you do on TV. I

18:51

think AFL is a fantastic spectacle

18:54

for sports lovers and GWS Giants

18:56

of course they're my team mate.

18:58

Alright. Alright now Toby we

19:00

want to get to know you a bit better because

19:02

it's the first time we've had you on where hopefully

19:05

we'd love to have you on on a regular basis

19:07

to talk the GWS up. So we need to get

19:09

to know you a bit better. So a couple of

19:11

quick questions right off the bat. What's your favourite film?

19:13

Yeah Man on Fire with Denzel. Oh he's the best.

19:15

He's the best. That's my favourite. Only

19:17

movie I've watched over about 10 times.

19:25

What about you MG? It'd be Titanic for you

19:27

is it? No I wouldn't. Because you're a Denzel

19:29

fan. I love him. I love

19:31

him. Denzel Washington is probably my favourite actor

19:34

along with Gerard Butler. I

19:36

think them two are great in them action type

19:38

movies. Alright what about

19:40

your first concert you ever went to Toby?

19:43

Yeah I'm not actually I can't remember it

19:46

off the top of my head but I'm

19:48

thinking it might have been Justin Timberlake. Justin

19:51

Timberlake. Here's

19:54

a bombshell for one of the hardest men in the

19:56

AFL. He's a softer, were you on your own? Well

20:00

you're on a date? We're trying to get a root? What was

20:02

happening? Um... I'm

20:05

not on a date with the mum, I'm not sure. Ha ha

20:07

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

20:09

ha ha ha ha ha! Oh,

20:11

alright. To take us out to date.

20:14

Are your favourite... Okay, just

20:16

say, hypothetical, you're on death row, you're

20:19

about to be... Actually, they

20:21

give you the last meal, what is Toby Green

20:23

order? Yeah, I think

20:25

I'm getting a, what a deavada

20:27

pizza. Nice Italian wine, wood-fired... I

20:30

think I have my go-to. A

20:33

wood-fired pizza, are you going to have pineapple on that?

20:36

No, no, hot salami mate, chilli oil, load

20:38

it up. Oh

20:40

mate, my tummy's rumbling

20:42

as we speak. Toby,

20:44

thanks for your time today, we'll catch

20:46

up with you soon. Good luck, I've

20:49

got to say, it's a battle of

20:51

the haves and the haves-nots out there

20:53

too. You've got those prancing showboats down

20:55

there at the Sydney Swans. And

20:57

then you've got the real deal out there

20:59

in the western suburbs who are a mean

21:01

business, they'll come to play. Toby,

21:04

have a great game and we'll look forward to talking to

21:06

you about a great win for the GWS. No,

21:09

I appreciate it, boys, thanks for having me and we'll

21:11

get a giant jumper sent to MJ, I think. Yeah,

21:14

yeah, make it a big one.

21:17

Tell you, Toby. What the hell is going

21:19

on? Good, you are dumb. What

21:22

is wrong with you? Nick and MJ,

21:25

what the... Toby,

21:27

do you see us? A man thought it

21:29

was a good idea to take a sip

21:31

of his friend's assisted suicide cocktail. What

21:33

the f***? What what? Yeah,

21:36

so, well, so the guy's got

21:38

pancreatic cancer, he's been allowed to

21:40

end his own life, they've put

21:42

together a cocktail of drugs that

21:44

will put him down, for want

21:47

of a better term. And his mate was

21:49

there, thought I'll have a sip. Why? You're

21:52

such an idiot. Ah, you know,

21:54

because that's what blokes do. I'll be

21:57

asked for a bendy straw, can I get some more ice in this?

22:00

I still drink that ahead

22:03

of a West End. That

22:08

is the worst beer. Seriously, knock

22:10

me out. How's

22:12

that? Do you know

22:15

anything that sums up men more

22:17

than I'll have a sip? It

22:19

would have been like, what does it taste like? What

22:22

does it taste like? Jesus

22:24

mate. It's sour. Alright,

22:29

you get the idea of men can be

22:31

dicks. What have you got him, Jay? Finnish

22:35

police, the Finns, were searching the inside

22:37

of a car after a crime and

22:39

they found a dead mosquito. They

22:41

tested the blood of the mosquito and identified

22:43

the thief. What? Yes,

22:48

unbelievable. So, hang on, they milked

22:50

the mosquito? Yes, they found

22:52

the dead mosquito around the

22:54

steering wheel and they said they can't assess

22:56

the blood of the... So

22:59

his last meal was the thief. And

23:01

they found the thief. Oh wow.

23:04

No way, mate. You are

23:07

ridiculous. If a mosquito

23:09

bit me, it would end up coming home drunk. The

23:16

wife was going to be going, where have you been? I

23:23

went out and I bit Mick my wife. You're

23:25

always biting Mick. I don't care.

23:29

And I come home, I don't need this. What's

23:31

all the questions about? That

23:34

would be too much. Can we get that fact

23:36

checked please that they're shaking their heads? They don't

23:38

know what to do with that. Tasha's

23:40

giving it my thumbs up. Oh

23:42

no, I thought that... Sorry. Give

23:44

me a thumbs up. Give

23:47

me a thumbs up, yes. That could be

23:49

one of the greatest so far. See,

23:52

you don't get away with much these days. Alright,

23:54

well done, Cat. What about you? A study

23:56

found you are more likely to have nightmares if you

23:58

sleep on your left side. side what

24:02

I've been ever some shockers like you

24:05

on your left side. Oh You

24:07

well, I don't want I'm on one

24:09

pillow Maybe

24:11

it's closer to your heart that way. I don't know.

24:14

Yeah, that's right. I'm G. It is more pressure on

24:16

your heart There we go. When did

24:18

you get so smart? I don't know if something's coming

24:20

to me. I've been bitten by a mosquito. Maybe I

24:22

don't know You've been hit on the head

24:24

on the way to work or something Topsie

24:27

TV all right, Tanya Tasha Belling you

24:29

you got one It's

24:37

so great. I love this story a

24:39

German billionaire declared dead in 2021 has

24:42

been found living with his mistress

24:44

in Moscow I

24:49

thought he went up some of the ski

24:51

lifts. Someone didn't want to play a divorce

24:54

settlement They

24:57

went on a ski lift and disappeared after that

25:00

he went on a ski lift and

25:02

didn't end up in Moscow Well

25:07

played You know

25:09

that's got to be pretty hard to

25:11

cop when your partner fakes their death.

25:13

Oh, yeah to get to go

25:15

remember was a living Newton John found out

25:17

that a Partner

25:19

was seen on a

25:21

bar drinking a Mexican you go gee What's

25:25

not a ringing endorsement is? All

25:30

right, let's get into it Kevin. What

25:32

do you got for us buddy a? Bar

25:34

of gold the size of the matchbox can

25:36

be flattened out to the size of the

25:39

tennis court what the? We're

25:41

getting this from Kevin you've

25:43

gone mad I Know that

25:45

you think so Say

25:48

it's a size of a matchbox you can

25:50

flatten it out. Oh, that's gonna

25:53

be really thin that gold Is

25:55

it what about squash court? I'll go with squish Pickleball

26:00

court. Pickleball? Pickleball? A

26:02

billion table. All right Kevin, whatever.

26:04

Vincent's on the line. Vincent?

26:06

Blow my mind. A Ukrainian

26:10

student had

26:13

his jaw blown off while chewing gum.

26:16

What the fuck? Hang

26:18

on. What did he do? You mean, I

26:21

don't understand. Someone shot him

26:23

while he was chewing gum. No,

26:26

he was chewing gum and it

26:28

blew his jaw off. He was a chemistry

26:30

student. What

26:34

was someone... Oh, so someone put

26:36

something in his chewing gum. He

26:39

was experimenting with chemicals with

26:42

chewing gum. So

26:44

he did it himself. What an idiot. He blew his

26:46

own jaw off on that. He gets

26:48

what he deserves then. Don't

26:51

think... Hey, by the way, on

26:53

chewing gum, here's something I've heard.

26:56

Oh, he get rid of that. You know

26:58

when you get the... what do you call it? Earworm? You

27:01

get a song stuck in your head and you can't get rid of it. Because I

27:03

suffer from this a bit. Chewing

27:05

gum helps. What

27:08

the fuck? Well, yes. Apparently

27:11

if you chew gum, it just takes

27:13

your mind off it or it gives your

27:15

body some other mechanism to... Excuse

27:17

me. I'm not getting thumbs down from you.

27:20

Is it the chewing gum made of

27:22

rubber? Is chewing gum made of rubber? What

27:25

the fuck? Is someone

27:27

stuck? Check that out. No, no, no. Isn't

27:30

it paint? Paint? Isn't

27:32

there paint in it or something? It's

27:34

quite a noise. Something... Oh, horse hoof.

27:36

Is there horse hoof? Horse hoof. I'm

27:39

getting no thumbs up. No. So

27:43

when I heard someone broke their jaw chewing,

27:46

I thought maybe a fantail. You can do it with

27:48

a fantail. A minty. A

27:51

cold minty. Sure. Would do

27:53

the job. A clinker. A

27:56

clinker. A clinker. That's... That'd

27:59

be... What we're talking To.

28:03

You know what citizens are? You seriously decided

28:05

I was. When

28:08

i have to look I'm i have

28:10

been a little hasty to get out

28:12

of the with it can be some

28:14

some a huge ice. Is

28:16

Vincent of a Black Ten told

28:19

us and told us that each

28:21

student died have to chewing gum

28:23

apparently was in our like a

28:26

chemistry? I was pissed font

28:28

around with some chemicals. Most talented early

28:30

resort to make it like last longer

28:32

if he was tournament Any Buffy Blue

28:34

resides your off to an end of

28:37

every get that fact checked We. Have

28:39

It was trying to improved access to the

28:41

gum and instead. Didn't. Put it in

28:43

the right us and instead dipped the chewing gum.

28:45

In all licensing of us thought man

28:47

I was I was there that guys.

28:50

That were. Bought. Of

28:52

being intimate in chemistry class I'm saying the

28:55

have a buzzing burner us into Jim Smith

28:57

Us it I Jim Cameron have a look

28:59

As someone with my persistence I give this

29:01

to be sorry right of us Easy way

29:04

I see never lost any be looked down

29:06

the barrel the bugs and Bernard cheated on

29:08

her were scouts with this A to eyebrows

29:10

dog had a clause farms or him for

29:12

me see it was hilarious. Months when we

29:15

go. Out

29:18

on my they when the sky blues your

29:20

of was you blog bubble that list. Of:

29:22

I'm like. I

29:24

was also side is Vincent he back

29:27

online Vincent that's a very good fact

29:29

of us been fact checked I apologize

29:31

for the same your favorite he receives

29:34

during what the is. Sad.

29:38

So good. Yeah you probably do. A surprise of

29:40

summers gives the ones you are Slim Shady ride.

29:43

Source: That's because they. Are

29:46

you? I'm getting j the morning bum

29:48

bag. Gets.

29:50

The Job. for

29:53

those who do what would you

29:55

like some ah summer juicy fruit

29:58

suing I'll

30:00

tell you what I'll give you, I'll give you

30:03

200 bucks for the best you've done well, mate.

30:05

Thank you very much. Doctor,

30:07

doctor, give me the news, I

30:09

got a bad case of love

30:11

in you. This is gonadore. Yeah,

30:15

doctor, another turbulent day in the

30:17

name of Rugby League. The axe

30:19

finally fell on Rabbitau's coach Jason

30:21

Dimitriou just before 8pm last night.

30:23

Mate, how did this unfold yesterday and where

30:25

to now for the South Sydney Rabbitau's as

30:27

far as the coaching goes? Yeah, good morning

30:30

guys, as you said, MG. We

30:32

spoke about it last Friday, how

30:34

a board meeting yesterday would determine

30:37

the fate of Rabbitau's coach

30:39

Jason Dimitriou and that was certainly the case

30:41

yesterday. Rarely have I seen two board meetings

30:43

in one day to decide the future of

30:45

an NRL coach, but that's what happened at

30:48

South. Yesterday morning, several hours

30:50

were spent, they couldn't come up with

30:52

a decision. They then recommenced

30:54

another board meeting around 5.30 yesterday

30:57

afternoon, of which concluded at 8

31:00

o'clock with the termination immediately of

31:03

Dimitriou's contract at South Sydney. And

31:05

that has prompted the elevation of assistant

31:08

coach, Dimitriou's assistant coach Ben

31:10

Hornby, into the interim coaching

31:12

role for the remainder of

31:15

this season. Look, it's an interesting

31:17

dynamic now, MG, and that is

31:19

Ben Hornby formerly worked

31:21

under Wayne Bennett. And Wayne

31:23

Bennett is the primary target now for

31:26

a South Sydney club, MG, that I

31:28

believe he's screaming out for an experienced

31:30

coach to take control of this

31:32

playing group and lead them to

31:34

where they should be going. And that's to the top of

31:36

the NRL ladder with that type of roster. It's

31:39

going to be interesting now, the next movements.

31:42

Bennett has always said he doesn't want to move

31:45

to a club, whatever the current coaches in

31:47

vogue. And that was the case with Dimitriou.

31:49

He's now gone and it open,

31:51

paves the way now for South Sydney to go help

31:53

a letter for the super coach.

31:56

Look, it's been a very, very turbulent time for

31:58

the South City Footy Club. Ah I

32:00

see the could have been handled better. But.

32:03

The same time, they've now made the decision.

32:05

And. I think retail sales for Psych. I

32:08

just typed been hornby can have some

32:10

top of him the impact the obeyed

32:12

injury. Just twenty four hours

32:14

there for my next match against the Penrith

32:16

Panthers. You. Know they say when

32:18

the interim coach is can we know is as

32:21

good luck Sir Lesser has the pier decide they

32:23

don't bit. Of a lot to

32:25

say code some hundred midseason with the results are

32:27

results are they had. Another. Club Searching

32:29

for Wins Doctors Paramount. I never had

32:32

their inspiration later. When. Guess I

32:34

guess as an aunt for extended periods on. What's.

32:36

Going on so small who apply for

32:38

back in his absence? Yeah, Jays, a

32:41

significant blind idea another couple of desperate

32:43

for when. Is. The Paramount. A

32:45

real than quick comparison. It is a boy

32:47

wait for the Yale. And. I answered

32:49

apply this weekend and said I saw it

32:52

as a window of opportunity for Clint. doubtless

32:54

and it down. Get his name. Shoot it's

32:56

Id say that our town don't get it

32:58

corrected. He had an answer. Starts to. Decline.

33:01

At Me Off Of which is as and

33:03

said it's just a an ongoing. It's certainly

33:05

to the last three legs. Ah,

33:08

he's also the next sort of saw

33:10

it would seem j as a significant

33:12

blow Look fly to London soon. Rasul

33:14

finally saw him and said they're all

33:16

been suggested it all back options at

33:18

this point in time. But. It's

33:20

a huge largest will quickly M J it's

33:23

an important guys and little margin. Is.

33:25

Often see a specialist on us on. he's

33:27

such a foot. In. An attempt to

33:29

come back earlier. Than. He's original

33:31

or turned out of around twelve. Where.

33:34

Did he get feel clean? It. could

33:36

side at least another week off that returned i

33:38

was would be seen at a time at a

33:40

real what it's worth of buddhism brown fullback and

33:43

just let him run anywhere that's more twenty cents

33:45

on that most of the doctor has always brother

33:47

thank you so much for your time we can

33:49

weed or italy stuff in the daily telegraph see

33:52

you on a fox was and he on trouble

33:54

my my you're busy man psyche doing any time

33:56

night and we rejoice live in a cd i'm

33:58

afraid of the same miracle He's just got

34:00

back from Hobart in Hylomeric. You

34:04

went into one of Cat's friends, do you? I

34:06

was in an Irish pub in Hobart because

34:08

there wasn't any in Sydney so I had to go to

34:10

Tasmania to find one. There's literally one

34:13

across the road from Dribbleham. But

34:15

I went there and I was having a quiet

34:18

Guinness with my mate and this girl came

34:20

up. She can only be described as one

34:22

of Cat's best mates and also described as

34:24

a total cougar. She

34:27

told me at the bar that I was a

34:30

wounded gazelle and I was like, no I'm just having a

34:32

Guinness. She said I can smell the injury and I was

34:34

like, no, no, I can still escape. Before

34:36

I knew it she had sunk her claws into me and

34:38

tried to drag me to the ground. I said I've got

34:40

to leave and she said I'm one of Cat's friends, we

34:42

all operate like this, so does she. I was like, she's

34:45

a lawyer so she's going to have your target. Now,

34:50

can you tell, did I

34:52

hear that you also used

34:56

the toot, the oldest toot in Hobart? This

34:58

is insane. When I was in Hobart I

35:00

went to this bar and I was sitting at

35:02

the bar with my mate. I turned around and

35:04

behind a big piece of glass, like literally only

35:06

a metre away, there's a dunny, like a long

35:08

drop. And I went, that's kind of a weird

35:11

place to have a dunny inside the bar one

35:13

metre away from where you're drinking. And

35:16

nobody said anything, nobody in Hobart, like we were

35:18

talking to the staff and having a couple of

35:20

drinks and at no stage did anybody say, oh

35:22

yeah, by the way, don't be scared that there's

35:24

a massive crapper right next to you. Like

35:27

they just didn't think to tell us. So after

35:29

about an hour I went, I've got to ask,

35:31

I said, sorry, I just wanted to know, what's

35:33

the long drop doing right next to you behind

35:36

the glass? And there was

35:39

no plaque or any reason for it.

35:41

And they said, oh, that's actually the

35:43

southern hemisphere's oldest flushing toilet. And

35:45

so we put it behind glass and I said,

35:48

well, if it's the oldest flushing toilet in the

35:50

southern hemisphere, I reckon that you should probably remove

35:52

it is what it looks like. Can

35:55

I just give some toilet, duck? Oh

35:57

yeah, exactly. It was pretty good. It

36:00

was pretty manky, you could see it there was

36:02

like even now like the wooden bench and the

36:04

hole cut and you just go Oh, there's some

36:06

suspicious looking stains, but no one goes and sits

36:08

on it while you just tap the tap the

36:10

glass No, right. There's no

36:12

there's none of that going on. Did you hear

36:15

today? This is true story today. There's they're developing

36:17

the woman's urinal I heard I heard you guys

36:19

talking about it and Ken said it

36:21

was like writing a saddle or something like that I

36:23

was talking about getting straddle or something straddle or something

36:25

Straddle or something? Straddle

36:28

or something? No, no, it's just Geez

36:33

It's out of tea that makes it different Like

36:35

writing a saddle Oh, I thought

36:37

we should have a straddle Oh geez Oh

36:41

geez Sure,

36:43

I mean I thought

36:45

they were going to a festival, but it's

36:47

clearly a German festival that they're going to

36:50

there That's coming to the bathroom, puts the

36:52

bead into your mouth, puts the boilers into

36:54

your mouth and then you go in

36:56

there and use the urinal I don't know, class is

36:58

it and such to me to be honest You

37:02

get a saddle in the bathroom and you want me to put

37:04

a ball in my mouth? Pop fiction

37:06

now, what are you talking about? Well,

37:10

you know what we need, something like the

37:12

Pope's testicle chair I love that testicle chair

37:14

I don't know, you didn't hear about this

37:17

So the Pope has a testicle chair that when you get

37:19

a new Pope they have to sit on Right,

37:23

and then a couple of blokes, you know like the hoist and the mechanics?

37:25

Yeah, yeah So

37:27

there's a bit, this is like your long drop

37:29

and the Pope sits on the testicle chair and

37:31

everyone comes in and looks up to make sure

37:33

he's got testicles Because they

37:36

do a stocktake Because this is

37:38

all because of Pope Joan Pope Joan back

37:41

in the day turned out to be a chick Who

37:44

could have used a sheepy or the female

37:46

urinal As it turns out, so

37:49

now they've got the testicle chair which the

37:51

Pope has to wander off to Probably with

37:53

some reading material under one arm Yeah, or

37:55

an iPhone Really?

37:57

Surely there's a better way of doing that you

38:00

just ask some of his mates. Sorry,

38:03

I was just wondering, Pope Clement, he's a

38:05

mate of yours. Has he got knackers? Yeah,

38:07

yeah, he has to play footy with him.

38:09

Sorry, I'm a few times. Oh my God,

38:11

he can do a wristwatch hamburger that you've

38:14

never seen before in your life. The Pope's

38:16

done a wristwatch. The

38:18

Pope has to write his name in

38:20

week. Pope John Paul. Alright, you're in.

38:22

You're in. Mac, what's the

38:24

friend of the show? We know he's

38:26

an avid outdoorsman. Someone

38:29

caught a million dollar fish up at Catherine. I

38:32

know you fish. How good would it

38:34

feel to catch a million dollar fish? Oh, it was

38:36

amazing. I love the young bloke who

38:38

won it too. He was chuffed

38:40

but he was still in control. His thoughts were collected.

38:42

They said, what are you going to do with a

38:44

million dollars? He said, I'm going to buy a speedboat

38:46

and a car today. And I was thinking, mate, I

38:49

reckon they're going to want to process them. I

38:52

don't reckon there's a guy standing behind you with a

38:55

duffel bag full of cash. But good luck

38:57

there. You've already figured out how

38:59

you're going to spend it. It's a great day at the river

39:01

though, isn't it? You go down with your haulway. I'm

39:04

guessing catching releases off the table, isn't it?

39:07

Keeping that one. Oh, 100%. You

39:09

turn that into Billy Bass. But also too, it's a

39:11

great fish anyway too. Like good size barry. You wouldn't

39:13

have wrapped it if you got that without the million

39:16

dollars. 67 centimetre, even by Northern Territory standards. That's

39:20

a fair old fish. You had an incident in

39:22

the river when you were a kid, didn't you?

39:24

Yeah, I go camping. Well, I haven't

39:26

been as much recently, but

39:28

I went camping recently in Robe

39:31

in South Australia with my

39:33

brother and the boys that took my son. My

39:35

brother had his son and a few mates and

39:37

we went in a convoy of four wheel drives.

39:39

And we're just like, you know, let's just go

39:41

through the sand dunes around Robe in South Australia

39:43

because we'll never ever get bogged. Ten minutes later,

39:45

bogged. Ten minutes later, bogged. A bogged in Robe?

39:47

You know, there's a lot of sand. I know.

39:50

There's a sand there. We're like, no, no, we'll be all right. Just

39:52

drive through. If it's going, yeah, we'll be all right. Just drive through.

39:55

We'll be fine. So there's

39:57

Merrick with a shovel. Five

40:00

minutes later, digging out the back axle, just

40:02

going, this is what fun is about, son.

40:04

Son, take a photo of dad digging out

40:06

a car. He's having the best

40:08

time of his life. Digging out a car.

40:10

Oh, well. That's camping for you.

40:13

Not as bad as my old man, though, boys. The

40:16

first time I went camping with my dad was

40:19

a really, really cold winter. And we're out, God knows,

40:22

in the middle of nowhere in a river, camp by

40:24

a river. And dad made

40:26

my brother and I, I was probably only

40:28

about eight or nine, he made us swim

40:30

across a freezing cold river. And he goes,

40:32

don't be soft. Get across the river. We're

40:34

going to go and get some firewood. And

40:36

I went, why do we have to swim

40:38

a river to get firewood, dad? Sure. There's

40:40

forest everywhere in the year. Anyway, so we're

40:42

going to go swim the river halfway across

40:45

it. I got swept away. There

40:47

you go. I got swept away. By the time I

40:49

got here. He says hypothermia written all over it. Yeah.

40:51

They had to run along the riverbank and then reach

40:53

out with a branch and catch me. Right?

40:57

So he had blueprints. It was.

40:59

He'd hear the banjos. It was about 500

41:02

meters down the river. It got me out.

41:04

I had hypothermia. I had all blown hypothermia.

41:06

I nearly died. And dad said, see, you

41:08

did really well there, son. But don't tell

41:11

your mom. Don't

41:14

tell your mom was a catchphrase when I was growing

41:17

up. Don't tell your

41:19

mom. Whatever you do. That

41:21

was a dad's special relationship with his son.

41:23

Yeah. But I can tell you, the reward

41:25

for it, though, has stayed with me forever. Because

41:27

I said to dad, I won't tell mom. But it's

41:29

going to cost you a can of Coke, four fried

41:31

dim sims, and a bucket of chips. And that's what

41:33

I had on the way home. And I went, I

41:35

won't tell mom. I've got dim sims to

41:37

eat. And that is

41:40

how the system works. I'm

41:43

afraid, mate. It's always a pleasure to catch up with

41:45

you. Now, you'll be in town for the Sydney Comedy

41:47

Festival, I'm guessing. Yeah. I'm

41:49

doing an Idiot's Guide to Wine, volume

41:51

two at the Grand Electric

41:53

in Surrey Hills for every weekend

41:56

in June. In June, I'll be done. Saturday,

41:58

Sunday. in

42:00

June every week. And then there'll

42:02

be it. There's a proper date

42:06

with one of the best in the business. Good on you

42:09

Merrick, thanks for swinging by today. Thanks for having me.