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Listen Bitch! The Patriarchy (Lite)

Listen Bitch! The Patriarchy (Lite)

Released Monday, 22nd April 2024
Good episode? Give it some love!
Listen Bitch! The Patriarchy (Lite)

Listen Bitch! The Patriarchy (Lite)

Listen Bitch! The Patriarchy (Lite)

Listen Bitch! The Patriarchy (Lite)

Monday, 22nd April 2024
Good episode? Give it some love!
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Episode Transcript

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1:16

That's R-E-B-A-G-1-0. This

1:25

week's episode of Listen Bitch contains

1:28

very strong language and some

1:30

adult themes as well. It's

1:42

time for Listen Bitch. Nini, this is

1:44

all yours. This is all yours today. I'm

1:46

gonna say nothing. No, that's not fair. I

1:48

made it quite clear last week and you

1:51

agreed that you were going to join in

1:53

and you weren't gonna let me just take

1:55

all of the flack like I normally do.

1:57

Listen, bitch, I've got notes. I've got notes.

2:00

Don't worry about me how you know

2:02

going into with that in that league

2:04

and into posts and into the home

2:06

page Jesus who put from the solo

2:08

it's know I just need you take

2:10

us to the bridge as it was

2:12

take off to the Blue Ridge. Just

2:16

say welcome to Misadventures Wow!

2:18

Can say listen fit. This

2:20

week we are talking about.

2:24

Love history. I. Say.

2:29

I've written some stuff down, I've done some

2:31

historical research he of my life and how

2:34

the patriarchy is effect Sit it. But for

2:36

now on know you guys think I say

2:38

we take this to the floor immediately know

2:40

who I'm Really just want to learn this

2:42

episode on. No, I haven't got much to

2:44

say. just one alarm. Size.

2:47

Suffice to love to have

2:49

our Sos moment of ah.

2:52

Education of the Patriarchy.

2:56

Is time to time. Hi Lily on

2:58

love you Poco So thank you very

3:00

much to me improve the last few

3:02

weeks mornings when a coup or live

3:05

in a small village called mobile he

3:07

was just the signals and on a

3:09

bow and sixty or seventy miles south

3:11

of Manchester to say that you understand

3:13

exactly where on my arms and of

3:16

you Drew Griffin My question is when

3:18

didn't dawn on you have this a

3:20

patriarchal system. What? Was the moment

3:22

would experience on what did

3:24

you do? Thank you thank.

3:26

You Michael the I Do I live really

3:28

kicks announcing thing about my a little and

3:30

house you live in what is your street

3:33

that like so yes and love the details.

3:35

Of the specificities, I'm.

3:38

Not unique Assist. With sea sauce says realize

3:40

that we live in a picture of his. Think

3:43

it might have been day me.

3:46

My. First. Single. Smile

3:49

as is my second single. I.

3:51

Went to number one in the chart. And

3:54

I was at T in the Park festival

3:56

and I was interviewed by I Think It

3:58

with someone from the and. me. And

4:02

they said, how are you going to celebrate your

4:04

number one? And I made a joke, as I

4:06

often do, that I was

4:08

going to engage in some,

4:11

you know, drug taking

4:13

and drinking, because we'd had

4:17

this we were having a conversation about

4:19

drugs in the music industry, me and this

4:21

journalist. And so then to follow up from

4:24

that conversation that we've been having about basically

4:26

how rice cocaine was in the music industry

4:28

at executive level. And so then at the

4:30

end of the conversation that I was having

4:33

with this guy who was like in his

4:35

mid 20s, maybe late 20s,

4:38

early 30s from the enemy. And,

4:41

and then he said, Oh, boy, how are you going to celebrate your

4:44

number one single? And I went, probably, I was

4:46

like, oh, and then the next day,

4:48

I think it was, you

4:50

know, a Sunday. And so it was a

4:53

front page of the

4:55

then news of the world. And

4:57

it was like, Lily Allen says she's

4:59

going to celebrate her number one single

5:01

with plates of cocaine. Now you might

5:04

think, Oh, that doesn't seem that

5:06

strange that that would be sensationalized

5:08

in such a way. But take into

5:10

account, my dad was, you know, an

5:13

actor and hung out with some

5:15

very famous showbiz people who were

5:17

all male, and all engaged in

5:20

these kind of activities, and were pretty vocal

5:22

about it. So, and I had

5:24

watched them all talk quite freely and

5:26

openly about the way that they spent

5:29

their spare time. And, and

5:32

so wrongly assumed that I would be able

5:34

to speak about these things in the same

5:36

way, without it being sensationalized

5:38

and euthanized and used against me in such a

5:40

way. Why was it

5:43

wrong? Oh, yes, you are.

5:45

I remember I was on, I was traveling

5:47

around the country for I think, people some

5:49

at all. And I read I remember seeing

5:51

that in the papers and thinking, Jesus Christ,

5:53

this is a lot. It was cute.

5:55

It was like, just, just that

5:57

language. Like I think it I think

5:59

they genuinely say plates of cocaine or something like that and

6:02

I was like this is bad. I think I had said

6:04

plates of cocaine to be fair

6:06

to them. It was a quote but it was just

6:08

that it was sensational. It was like the

6:11

front, the big headline on the news of

6:13

the world. I'd only just gone to number

6:15

one. I wasn't even around

6:18

for a couple of months so it was kind of like it

6:21

was very crazy. But yes I

6:23

think that was when I realised

6:25

okay, okay there's a different

6:27

set of rules for boys and girls,

6:29

men and women. I

6:32

think mine would probably be the writer's room

6:34

in Potwell when I was about 16 and

6:36

I said something was not funny and

6:41

I didn't think that was a big thing to say

6:43

because it wasn't funny. It was like a pun, you

6:45

know how much I hate a pun and

6:47

I think it involved the word smorgasbord and

6:49

I was like this is bullshit and they

6:51

were like what? You don't think

6:53

this is funny? And I was like no. And

6:56

they were like well have you got, you have to think it's like better

6:58

then. I was like okay. And I

7:00

was like oh right I'm not allowed to think that you're

7:02

not a genius and this is

7:04

dog shit and you know it. So

7:07

I quite like continuing

7:09

to test that theory. I

7:12

don't think men like being told they're not

7:14

geniuses. No, no. It's

7:18

not fun. But yeah thank you. Thank

7:20

you Michael. Thank you. Can we have

7:22

another question for Lissenbitch, the

7:25

patriarchy. Hi it's Liz from Eastbourne.

7:28

We've gone patriarchy-like with this question.

7:30

I would love to know of

7:32

any famous men you've come across

7:34

in your time in your careers

7:36

who were feminists. I'd love to

7:39

hear about some strong feminist

7:42

famous men that you have come across

7:44

that you could tell us about. Thanks.

7:46

That's nice. Patriarchy-lite. Thanks

7:48

Liz. I'll not step on

7:50

anyone. While

7:55

talking about the patriarchy. It's a nightmare.

8:00

Let's keep it light, let's keep it peppy. Lil, what's your

8:02

answer to that question? It's a bit of a

8:04

difficult little answer. Um, I... I

8:08

would say... I'm not my

8:11

husband. My husband is

8:13

famous and he is a feminist. That's

8:16

true. He's true. What

8:19

would you say makes you cool? Why

8:21

would you say that David is a feminist? What

8:23

about him? What about his actions and his moves? Makes

8:26

you feel that way. I think

8:28

maybe it's because he is

8:30

very sensitive to, um,

8:33

you know, my resistance

8:36

to, you know,

8:38

a marriage that adheres to sort of

8:41

like gender norms or societal norms. You

8:43

know, he can see how uncomfortable

8:46

things make me and

8:50

he's very good at helping

8:52

me navigate and negotiate those things. So like,

8:54

you know, I remember once

8:57

when he... We went on a

8:59

holiday and he paid for the whole holiday and that

9:01

never happened to me before. Like, I'd always paid for

9:03

everything and it came out in other ways. Like, we

9:05

were arguing about something and he took me and said,

9:07

can I just have a word with you? And I

9:10

was like, yeah, sure. And he took me off and

9:12

he was just like, no, look. I

9:16

know this makes you very uncomfortable.

9:19

And that's okay. It's okay. I love

9:21

you. I love your children. I

9:23

love this. It's an

9:25

absolute pleasure for me to treat you

9:27

guys to this experience. You don't owe

9:29

me anything. You don't have to do

9:31

anything in return. And I was

9:34

like, shit, I married the right

9:36

person. She knows me and loves me. What

9:38

will I do? No, but he's very good.

9:40

I don't think many people... Well,

9:42

I don't... I'm not going to speak for

9:44

men because I wasn't even articulating or vocalizing,

9:46

but he was able to see exactly what

9:49

was winding me up that

9:51

I didn't want to be... whatever. I

9:54

digress. I get it, babe. I love him

9:56

too. I love him too. question

10:00

I don't think I have a famous one they're all

10:02

unfamous the one that I can

10:04

think of. Matty Healy he's a big old feminist. There

10:07

you go, there you

10:09

go. Steve

10:14

Jones, Steve Jones is a feminist. I

10:16

was going to say Steve Jones but

10:18

I've already talked about Steve Jones so

10:20

we'll just go with Matty Healy. Next

10:22

question. Such a big old feminist. Such

10:25

an incredible feminist. Next question

10:27

please, so listen bitch. Hi Lilly,

10:29

hi Makita. My name is

10:32

Josh. I'm from New Jersey in the United

10:34

States. Question for you

10:36

both about the patriarchy. I

10:38

was wondering if you have any favorite art

10:41

that is reflective of a

10:43

woman's experience living in the patriarchy or

10:45

something that shows how bad the patriarchy

10:47

is or is a good portrayal of

10:50

showing the patriarchy in a way

10:53

that's productive. I guess

10:55

just to plug as a fan really quick I

10:57

think a really good example of something that comes

10:59

out of the patriarchy, Lilly, is your song not

11:01

fair because it's all about men

11:03

focusing on their own pleasure and not the pleasure of

11:05

a woman. So I'm

11:07

just curious. Love you both and if

11:10

you take this question, thanks and yeah

11:12

have a great day. Bye. Thanks

11:15

Josh. I love when Americans say my name. Makita

11:17

is hot. Thanks Josh. Oh

11:19

that's nice. I agree with

11:21

Josh about that. It's

11:23

not fair. It's about a woman's right

11:25

to pleasure in sex. A woman's right to

11:27

pleasure in sex. Look at you you bloody

11:29

feminist. I was talking such shit I didn't even

11:32

have an orgasm at that point. I

11:34

know I regret. I'm

11:36

so about to say at

11:39

that time you were only at the

11:41

beginning of your sexual pleasure journey

11:44

awakening. Well quite. So

11:47

how did you step in those, how did you

11:49

get into that headspace? You

11:51

just sort of women their needs all around the world? No

11:54

I guess maybe it was because I wrongly

11:56

had assumed that my way to an orgasm

11:58

was going to be a... man giving it

12:00

to me and that

12:03

hadn't happened yet and

12:05

so I was cross I was very cross.

12:08

People don't know this about me but I'm

12:10

a big Taylor Swift fan. There's

12:13

a song of hers called The Man. Do

12:16

you know it? Do you know the song? No I

12:18

don't think so. The chorus goes I'm so sick

12:20

of running as fast as I can wondering

12:23

if I'd get there quicker if I

12:25

was a man and I'm so sick

12:27

of them coming at me again. If

12:30

I was a man and I'd

12:32

be the man I'd be the

12:34

man. Yeah? Yeah?

12:37

Yeah? I'd be

12:39

the man. Yeah? Everything

12:41

sounds like a nursery rhyme from Taylor Swift and not

12:43

in a rude way.

12:45

I'm not being derogatory. I think she's very clever.

12:47

They say I'd hustled put

12:50

in the work they wouldn't shake their heads

12:52

and question how much of this sounds good.

12:54

Okay okay we definitely don't have the right

12:56

fees you just keep singing the whole song. Well

12:58

there we go Taylor Swift I love

13:00

your song The Man. David and I

13:02

debate it quite often because he it's

13:04

not his favorite Taylor Swift song and

13:07

it's one of my favorite I think

13:09

the lyrics are very clever and he

13:11

does not. She's very clever at writing

13:13

very simplistic sort of nursery

13:15

rhyme sounding songs

13:17

but actually she's saying something in

13:20

the background. Yeah. She's nice. She's

13:22

undeniably smart. She is exactly. The

13:25

only artist I've ever made a

13:27

billion dollars from music. She's not

13:29

an idiot. News slash. No. Can

13:32

we have another question on Listen Bitch?

13:34

4 Listen Bitch? 2 Listen Bitch? Hello

13:37

Nikita and Lily is Dan here from

13:39

London. About 18 months ago my husband

13:41

and I had a gorgeous daughter, Hargo

13:43

Lily, by a surrogacy in America and

13:46

we've got a little boy just about

13:48

to be born in May.

13:50

Now we're always talking about as two

13:52

dads what the best way to bring

13:55

our daughter up is and we always

13:57

want to make sure she's used to

13:59

it. living the fullest,

14:01

most brilliant, strongest, most incredible

14:04

life. And I would

14:07

love your advice on what tips you

14:09

think we should give her as two

14:11

dads to overcome the patriarchy. Do

14:13

you know what? I just remembered

14:16

something from a previous question, a famous

14:18

male in the world that is a

14:20

brilliant, true feminist is Loyal Connor. He

14:22

was doing for People in America. He

14:24

does well in America, but Loyal Connor's

14:26

a rapper, a musician, he's more

14:28

than a rapper, he's just an artist, he's

14:30

brilliant, and he's a great man, and a

14:32

friend of mine and my mum's. And he

14:36

was doing a six music residency,

14:38

and it was banging, and one

14:40

episode was about, it was

14:42

Mother's Day. And the way he spoke

14:44

about his partner, his girlfriend,

14:46

and his mother, I

14:48

was kind of bowled over by just

14:50

the love he has for women, proper,

14:53

it's true and it's real. And it

14:55

made me think that if

14:57

you're, I know you're raising a daughter, but if

14:59

you were raising sons, it's like how do you

15:01

raise sons to truly love women? And I

15:04

think as a woman, you know, you're raising

15:06

a daughter, as a woman, that's what stands out to

15:08

me when you know that a man has been raised

15:10

to truly love women. That

15:13

for me feels really good. I don't know whether

15:15

that answers the question that you asked, but I

15:17

just wanted to make that point. Because you're raising

15:19

daughters as well, Lil. I am raising

15:21

daughters. I guess language,

15:24

I think, is important.

15:26

I think there are so many words

15:29

that on the surface seem quite

15:32

inoffensive or that

15:35

actually can be quite insidious

15:37

when they're sort of used

15:39

every day. And words that

15:41

would, that you hear

15:44

being used in conjunction with women or girls that

15:46

there isn't really like a male equivalent for. Right,

15:49

like what? Like

15:52

bitchy or nag

15:55

or, you know, do you not

15:57

hear people go like, he's a bit cold. It's

16:00

not really a word associated with men. For

16:03

women maybe like intense

16:05

or stroppy. Forward. You

16:07

just sound like the Daily Mail now.

16:11

Shrill. Shrill

16:13

is a good one. Shrill.

16:15

Isn't that interesting though, that word? Because

16:17

it's literally like the

16:19

sound of a woman's voice

16:22

irking another human being. Just

16:24

the sound of a woman's voice. So basically

16:26

a woman existing and having space and a

16:28

voice. Language

16:30

is a big one. Point though.

16:32

Yes and even when you're talking

16:34

about the way women look, just

16:37

words like, oh you know that's

16:39

flattering. He's

16:42

really let himself go. Never said to be

16:44

a man, ever. Babe

16:48

you look a bit frumpy in that to be honest. I

16:53

used to really like you in that shirt but it looks a

16:55

little bit frumpy. Maybe we should

16:57

do an experiment and try and use some of this

16:59

language again. I don't think I've ever spoken to a

17:01

boy like this. Well you know what actually I was

17:03

looking last night on the

17:05

Daily Mail website just to see what the some

17:07

of the adjectives used for women

17:10

versus men are because there's always like you

17:12

know the person's name and then an adjective

17:14

right. Yes. Nicola

17:16

Pelt suffers unexpected

17:19

backlash. Nicola Pelt's

17:21

Brooklyn Beckham's wife. Henry

17:23

Cavill reveals he is

17:25

expecting his first child. Johnny

17:28

Depp embraces his co-star.

17:32

Salma Hayek puts on a busty display

17:34

as she shows off her chest. Justin

17:40

Bieber makes surprise

17:42

return. Nikki

17:45

Hilton shows off. Keith

17:47

The Sutherland reunites. Jerry

17:51

Bruckheimer looks dapper. Oh

17:53

yes of course always.

17:55

Alessandra Ambrosio flashes her

17:57

taut abs. Paris Hilton shows

17:59

off. shows off. Timothy

18:01

Chalamet is joined by Harrison

18:05

Ford recalls Anna

18:08

Maxwell can't wipe the smile

18:10

off her face and

18:13

I think we'll end with that one.

18:15

I think that says it all really.

18:17

Language is important. So last night I

18:19

was doing a little bit of a

18:21

deep dive around this language

18:23

and communication and was reading the musings

18:25

of Deborah Cameron who was the Rupert

18:28

Murdoch professor of language and communication

18:30

at the University of Oxford.

18:33

Wow. That's right. The

18:35

Rupert Murdoch professor of

18:37

language and communication. She

18:41

specialises in socio-linguistics especially the

18:43

relationship between language and gender,

18:45

language ideologies and linguistic normativity

18:48

discourse analysis. That's the Rupert

18:50

Murdoch professor of language and

18:52

communication at Oxford University. I

18:54

hope that answered your question.

18:56

We really did go on but there

18:58

was a lot to cover within that.

19:00

Thank you very much and good luck

19:02

raising your beautiful daughter in a

19:05

slightly less patriarchal world which we all

19:07

hope for every day. Okay.

19:09

Thank you. And we

19:11

will be back with more questions about the

19:13

patriarchy after this little break. Just

19:16

a little one. Just a little breaky. Cool

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linkedin.com/people today. We

20:19

have a question now from Charlotte. Lovely Charlotte.

20:21

Hello, Charlotte, what would you like to know?

20:23

What would you like to share about the

20:25

patriarchy? Hi, I'm Makeda and Lily. My name

20:27

is Charlotte and I'm based in Kent. So

20:29

for context, I started my

20:32

own social media marketing business when I

20:34

was on maternity leave with my nearly

20:36

two year old daughter now. And somehow

20:38

the majority of my client base is

20:41

made up of middle aged men. And

20:44

with that comes the odd misogynistic comment that you

20:46

get. So my question for you is in your

20:49

career so far, how do you handle these types

20:51

of comments from superiors that you still want to

20:53

work with because they pay you? But how

20:56

can you have a funny comeback that doesn't make

20:58

you lose your job? For example, one of my

21:00

favorites is what weird thing to say out loud,

21:03

but I'd love to hear what yours have been

21:05

and ones that you've used in the past. That's

21:07

very good, Charlotte. Confusion works

21:10

better than in like

21:12

sort of knee jerk

21:15

reactive emotion, I

21:17

think in those kinds of situations. I

21:19

really like that. That's so cutting. What a

21:21

weird thing to say out loud. Oh yeah.

21:24

That's basically saying you're

21:26

a dickhead without saying you're a dickhead. Nice.

21:29

Lily, lyrics thread, songwriting

21:31

genius, Ivan Avelo winning

21:34

lady. You've

21:36

got some bloody corkers

21:39

in this field, haven't you? Really? I'm

21:41

drawing blanks right now. To be

21:43

honest, I don't really have any male

21:45

superiors. I'm self-employed.

21:49

I guess, you know,

21:51

maybe the people that my old record company

21:54

could have been described as being my superiors.

21:56

Yes, and you were with them entangled with

21:59

them for life. 15 years. I

22:01

remember once actually when I wrote this song called

22:03

Hard Out Here, it had

22:05

like the word bitch in it about 176 times. And

22:09

when it got sent to America to like the radio play people,

22:11

we got an email back from them saying, you know, she's going

22:14

to have to take some of the bitches out of this. And

22:16

I was like, which one? And

22:21

there's like bits of it where like she

22:24

refers to herself. I like I referred to myself as

22:26

a bitch. It's like some boys be talking about their

22:28

bitches and be making a fuss. Anyway, he'd like written

22:30

this thing. And he was like, I think, you

22:33

know, men don't really want to hear women

22:35

refer to themselves as a bitch. I was

22:38

like, thank you. Thank

22:40

you for that. Graham

22:42

from radio promotion

22:45

in like Idaho. Like

22:48

why don't you go fuck yourself? There you

22:50

go, Charlotte. Just

22:53

a classic. Why don't you fuck yourself? Just

22:55

keep it classic. Keep it classic. The bitches

22:57

stay. The bitches stayed. And

22:59

I'm scared of him right now. I don't know. It's because we're

23:02

talking about the patriarchy. No,

23:04

no, no. Dino's a feminist. It's fine.

23:07

Dino's taking all this in. He's like, I'm not a fan of him. I'm

23:09

not a fan of him. I'm not a fan of him. I'm not a

23:11

fan of him. I'm not a fan of him. I'm not a fan of

23:13

him. I'm not a fan of him. But if you're

23:15

gay and you do,

23:18

you're gonna be like, I'm sorry.

23:25

If we're sorry. We're

23:29

gonna Only se you For

23:32

blaming Light. That shows you you know what? Well,

23:36

all your love-ins SELL her. For

23:39

what? Sure. I love

23:41

that, I love that. I love that. No. We

23:44

can create life inside of our bodies. We

23:47

literally can grow babies. There's a

23:49

power in that, being able to create

23:51

life. And actually, men are

23:54

resentful of this because they don't have that

23:56

power to do that. And that's why,

23:58

since the beginning of time they've basically

24:00

been trying to take power away

24:03

from women, you know, since forever,

24:05

especially sexual or reproductive freedoms. So

24:07

just wondered if you thought if there was any truth

24:10

to that. Thanks, bye. Absolutely. Sorry,

24:12

I got that so wrong. You're actually

24:14

from North West London. My R is

24:16

a bit so thank you. And

24:18

you're actually called Laura. Thank you, Laura. I totally

24:21

agree. I think it's

24:23

almost, it's also a bit like

24:27

racism towards black people. I feel like

24:30

for millennia, the fear

24:32

was about the power and magic

24:34

of black people. And

24:36

if there's nothing to be scared of,

24:38

you don't try and suppress something or

24:41

dehumanize something if it doesn't scare you.

24:44

And I think that women do scare men with how

24:46

powerful we are, and always have.

24:48

I remember I was doing this, remember

24:50

that there was that brilliant TV show

24:52

The Underground Railroad. It's absolutely brilliant. So

24:54

I did a podcast to accompany it.

24:56

And it was all about rebellions throughout

24:59

enslavement that we aren't told about. And

25:02

there was this incredible story about the

25:04

Dohome tribe. This is men underestimating women.

25:07

And they capture or this whole gang

25:09

of women, but in their head, it's

25:11

just a load of chicks. But actually,

25:13

they're an army. And because they're women,

25:15

and they want to sort

25:17

of rape and torture and sodomize them, they don't put

25:19

them on the lower deck, they put them on the higher

25:21

deck, and they don't tie them up. And

25:23

the women overthrow the boat and turn

25:25

it around and take it back to

25:28

Africa. And that is what happens when

25:30

you underestimate a woman. So I think

25:32

that the power of women is

25:35

underestimated often, but it's known and

25:37

feared, which is why we're suppressed

25:39

by men so often. That's

25:41

what I think. Yeah, no, I totally agree. I

25:43

mean, I think that, you know, ultimately, it's rooted

25:46

in greed as well. I mean, as far as

25:48

I know, I think that like the patriarchy in

25:50

it, you know,

25:53

came from, you know, the transition

25:55

between hunter and gatherer times to

25:58

like, when land and agriculture

26:00

became like tools of

26:02

bargaining and trade and so women kind

26:05

of got lumbered in with that

26:07

as a commodity and that was the sort of

26:09

beginning of like the subjugation of women in that

26:12

sense. I think that yes there's

26:14

a fear of it but it's also like oh that

26:16

we can use them, we can

26:18

profit off of them. I think

26:21

it's interesting as well as that you

26:23

know the period of time

26:26

that we are fertile for that we

26:28

can make babies relatively short and

26:31

I feel like in

26:33

my own life anyway it'd be great to like be

26:35

able to get that stuff over the way, out of

26:38

the way, do the feeding and then get to work

26:40

like actual work in

26:43

the world. That's when I became like smart

26:45

and understood things

26:47

better anyway like before I had kids I

26:49

was relatively a fucking idiot. Excuse me I

26:51

haven't had kids so do you bar? No

26:54

I don't, I'm talking about my own experience

26:56

but I think that like if it was

26:59

the societal norm for you to like get

27:01

them out when you're young and

27:03

chuck them you know and then the dad

27:05

raised them they're like much better made for

27:07

raising kids anyway they can lift them up,

27:09

they can play the games, they're more on

27:11

their emotional level like you know they're

27:14

the ones that should be raising the kids while

27:16

we go and do the proper stuff. That would

27:19

be great. Yeah you know we'll just pop

27:21

them out and I'm like we're done for when we're done

27:23

for like you know find another one

27:25

that you need to knock up the duff

27:27

and but look after the kids while I'm

27:29

out there murning the money. Doing the stuff.

27:32

This is taking a strange chance.

27:35

Well I am with you. Yeah

27:39

exactly. But Lily, alarm for

27:41

Lily to stop.

27:44

I hope that answered your question. I

27:46

feel like we did. Yeah, bit around

27:48

the houses but we definitely got somewhere

27:50

in the end. Next question please for

27:52

listen bitch. Hey Lily and Makita my

27:55

name's Maisie I'm from South London and I've really really

27:57

been enjoying your podcast. It's so nice to hear you

27:59

guys chatting. My question for

28:01

you guys is how do

28:03

you feel that the effect the patriarchy has and

28:06

has had on the creative industries has

28:09

changed since you guys first started out and

28:11

from when someone might be starting out now?

28:14

I think it's gotten easier, it's gotten worse,

28:16

the effects, yeah that's basically my

28:18

question. I really wish I could say it's got

28:20

it's changed so much in 25 years but I don't know

28:25

how much it has in my

28:27

industry anyway in telly. How about in

28:29

music? How about in acting? No I think it's

28:31

worse. Worse?

28:34

Yeah but I think that's rooted in social

28:36

media and rather than anything else I just

28:38

think that social media really plays into those

28:40

like gender

28:42

stereotypes and everything

28:46

was so data-led and so data-driven so

28:48

right in terms of music we

28:50

need it ultimately is like investment right to

28:53

be able to plug things to

28:55

get things you know give things prominence on the

28:57

internet or on the TV or even

28:59

just like going out and about and showcasing your music

29:01

like you need money to be able to do it

29:04

and the way that the people that have the money

29:06

decide on where those funds are spent is

29:08

by looking at the data online and as

29:10

a woman the way that

29:13

you increase those numbers is

29:15

by taking your clothes off or by

29:17

wearing lots of makeup and so I

29:19

think it's got harder I think it's

29:21

got harder for people that aren't considered

29:24

you know beautiful

29:26

or extraordinary looking to

29:30

break through in creative industries. Yeah

29:33

like when I first got my job

29:35

it was like the people around me

29:37

that and the people who preceded me

29:39

like Zoe Ball and Sarah Cox and

29:41

Kat Dealey so I love Kat

29:44

Dealey all very attractive

29:46

but it wasn't really about that

29:48

I thought they were funny and

29:51

smart and I think now

29:53

I think being a TV presenter

29:55

is kind of lost

29:58

in being an influencer. which is

30:00

lost in just being an attractive person. And it's

30:03

not really a job to just be an attractive

30:05

person. True. But then at the same time, like,

30:07

do you really think BBC would have given us

30:09

this podcast if we weren't as hot as we

30:11

are? Yeah. We weren't

30:14

so bloody gorgeous. Good point. Um,

30:17

I don't know. It's audio, baby. Oh,

30:22

yeah. I know we're filming

30:24

it, but it is audio. So

30:27

I don't know how hot we have to

30:29

be for this. I will also say, though,

30:32

in the beginning of my career, like, I

30:34

didn't have hair and makeup people. When I

30:36

look at, like, my performances of me at

30:38

Glastonbury, the idea that, like, Dua Lipa will,

30:40

like, pop up on stage without full hair

30:42

and makeup and styling. And at that point

30:45

in my career, I was literally like, ehh,

30:47

doing it all myself. Totally. I had to

30:49

ask for makeup after about a year of

30:51

doing Pot World. Kevin, my wonderful makeup artist,

30:53

came in with S Club's Juniors, and

30:56

he did, I went in. I said, could you do a bit

30:58

of makeup for me? Because I don't know what I'm doing.

31:00

I don't even know how to put makeup on. I was

31:02

wearing white eyeshadow, and he did it, and I begged him.

31:04

I said, can he stay? Can he, like, be employed? And

31:06

they were like, oh, God, all right. It's like, no,

31:08

it's actually a TV show, and there are cameras and

31:11

lights and stuff. Like, I think we need a makeup

31:13

artist. But we were kind

31:15

of free in that way, I think, again,

31:17

because it wasn't about being really beautiful and

31:19

groomed and glamorous, our jobs. It wasn't. It

31:21

was about me being good at what I

31:23

was doing and you being good at what

31:26

you were doing. And it takes more work,

31:28

by the way, as the older you get

31:30

to be able to conform to those societal

31:32

expectations of how we should look. And obviously,

31:34

I started selling less records for the record

31:36

company. They were like, oh, that's quite

31:38

a lot of money for hair and makeup. I'm like, I'm about to

31:40

be 30 bucks! I'm getting into

31:43

a really tricky area. Yeah,

31:46

like, could you have done this to me at

31:48

26? No,

31:51

they didn't. I did it myself when I

31:53

didn't need it. Now I do need it.

31:55

And they're like, ooh, yeah, sorry. But we're

31:57

giving all that money to the other. Children

32:03

What's the next question please no in

32:05

the last question my darling this last

32:07

can we have a lot Hello,

32:11

it's be from London My

32:14

question for you both on the

32:16

theme of patriarchy is about catcalling

32:19

because I find that catcalling is

32:21

one of those like Loki Annoying

32:24

but like fairly frequent occurrences that happen

32:26

in patriarchy And I wondered whether you

32:28

two have had a situation happen where

32:31

someone is the old something At you

32:33

in the street and you have managed

32:35

to get your wits about you and

32:38

come up with an amazing comeback In

32:40

the moment and if you haven't Then

32:43

I also wanted to know what is

32:45

the ultimate comeback for a shitty man? Yelling

32:48

at you in the street. Love you. Thank

32:50

you. Bye. Thank you, darling I wish I had

32:53

an answer Yeah

32:56

one time I said this but no

32:58

I One thing

33:01

that is particularly creepy is that I have never

33:03

been catcalled more than when I used to go

33:05

to school and be in My school uniform and

33:07

I still think that was truly fucked up because

33:09

the school uniform Literally says I am under 16

33:12

and that's when I got catcalled enough and I didn't

33:14

I didn't have a comeback I felt quite intimidated and

33:16

freaked out. Oh, oh, oh, oh Oh, oh, although

33:19

on my 30th talking about getting a bit older

33:21

on like my 35th birthday So

33:34

sometimes it's quite nice to be catcalled

33:37

it's fancy energy of the cat call the

33:39

energy of the cat call Yeah, I definitely notice

33:41

it's not happening quite as

33:43

much as it used to when I

33:45

was younger. It's okay, babe It's

33:47

okay, babe I will last week actually I was on

33:50

the subway in New York City and I walked down

33:52

the platform and this guy kind of like Locked eyes

33:54

of me and as and I was like is he

33:56

gonna like mug me or something and then I got

33:58

close and she went Stop! Stop!

34:05

I was like, okay, fine. Do

34:09

you know when you're being hit on? I really

34:11

have no idea anymore. Especially now I've got this

34:13

fucking puppy because the puppy is so cute that

34:15

everyone wants to look at us and talk to

34:18

us. I'm like, look at this. I'm like, oh,

34:20

it's the puppy. So I

34:22

never really know when someone is like hitting on me.

34:24

I don't think I've ever been hit on, to be

34:26

honest. But you

34:29

do get cackled. No, I didn't get cackled. That

34:31

was someone literally just locking eyes on me. Didn't

34:34

they used to call it white van man something?

34:36

Yeah, and also like scaffolders. You know,

34:38

when I like drive and cast like a

34:40

bunch of scaffolders and they're like waggling.

34:42

Yeah, but I quite... Is this all what I

34:45

call it? Yeah, don't say

34:47

that. Don't miss it. Don't admit

34:49

it. No, because I fancy

34:51

builders. Well, the

34:53

question is, have you ever had a good

34:55

comeback? And the answer is no. No. I

35:00

don't know why we're pussy flitting around this. No. From

35:07

Texas to New York City. That was

35:09

listen bitch. Live in direct from America.

35:11

Isn't that weird that we're both in

35:14

America? Was that a terrible one? No,

35:16

I really enjoyed the patriarchy.

35:18

But I am gonna lighten

35:21

the mood, I suppose is

35:23

the word. That's three words.

35:25

Yes, lighten. We're gonna lighten

35:27

the... We're gonna nice up

35:29

the area as my mum would say. Nice

35:31

up the dance. We're gonna nice up the dance.

35:34

Let's nice up the dance. Next week's theme

35:36

is... Boobs.

35:43

Oh my God. You can

35:45

call them breasts. You can call them ticks.

35:47

You can call them boobs. But today I'm

35:49

calling them boobs. The theme for next week's

35:51

Listen Bitch is boobs. I think it's really

35:53

important. My boobs are not what they used

35:55

to be. Remember how good they were?

35:58

Uh, yeah. Come. on

36:00

27. I had the best boobs out

36:02

here and I would like to

36:04

talk about... General...

36:10

uh what's the word? Anyway they're not great anymore.

36:12

That'd be great but they're not like what they

36:14

used to be and also

36:16

I've had two friends go

36:19

through breast cancer recently so I've been thinking about

36:21

boobs in a very different way and I think

36:23

you do as you get older. So boobs it

36:25

is bitch, boobs it is. No

36:29

reaction from you at all, nothing to

36:31

say. I mean great great.

36:36

For the audio this is Lily is

36:38

mimicking squeezing breasts now so that's where

36:41

we're at. Great great. Great

36:43

great honk honk. Oh 8,030,40,90. That's right,

36:45

that's right you better believe it. Send

36:54

us a little voice note. Yes send us

36:56

a little voice note, don't forget to leave

36:58

your name and your geographical location. Yeah and

37:00

take Josh's lead and really like I don't

37:02

know what your street looks like at this

37:04

point and if you live in a terraced

37:06

house or social housing or if you

37:09

have a view these things I really

37:11

am interested in. We will see you next

37:13

week. I love you, I'll see

37:15

you later. Bye kids,

37:18

love you. Hope there aren't any

37:20

offended men out there. Hello,

37:27

so welcome to Miss Meat with Lily Allen

37:29

and a missy for Oliver. This is a

37:31

person-phonica production for BBC Town. I'm

37:39

Natalie Cassidy and I'm Joanna Page. Join us

37:41

for our podcast Off The Tele where we

37:43

chat about what we can't stop watching, what

37:46

we're definitely not going to bother with and

37:48

most importantly what you're all watching at home

37:50

too. No judgment here. Well a bit. Off

37:54

the Tele listen on BBC Sound. What

37:57

we watching then? Hey

38:08

folks, I'm Mark Maron from the

38:10

WTF Podcast, and this episode is

38:12

brought to you by Kleenex Ultra

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