0:00

She's an urban torch singer who set the music

0:02

world on fire. The

0:05

flame inside Mary J. Blige was ignited

0:07

by a tough childhood, a broken

0:09

home, and a father who left when

0:11

she was just nine years old. Mary

0:14

J. Blige exploded to become a singing

0:16

sensation, but she still couldn't

0:18

find in her solace. The

0:21

more her record sales rose, the further

0:23

Mary's spirits seemed to fall. It

0:26

took a brush with death from Mary to

0:28

learn how to celebrate life. Now,

0:31

the queen of hip hop soul, Mary

0:34

J. Blige the story behind the

0:36

music. Her

0:41

street wise songs about hard knocks

0:43

and bitter heartbreak have made her a legend

0:46

in her own time. It's not like somebody

0:48

just getting up there saying trying to

0:51

make some money or whatever. You really

0:53

feel what she's saying. It's like,

0:55

oh, I just really felt real

0:57

love. I just really felt pain in my heart

0:59

and I felt it through Mary's voice. She's

1:02

like, are with the Frankler? You

1:04

know what I'm staying. As far as hip hop concern, with

1:07

five platinum albums and fifteen top

1:10

ten singles, Mary J. Blige is a

1:12

bona fide superstar. Ironically,

1:15

she has spent most of her career dog by bouts

1:17

of depression and self doubt. This

1:20

woman was in so much pain

1:22

that all these wonderful things that were happening

1:25

to her, all she really wanted

1:27

in her life was to be loved for herself.

1:30

Not the artist, not the star,

1:33

but just playing on. Mary, you

1:36

have the strangers that love you,

1:39

but you don't believe in you. You just singing. You're

1:41

just an empty little kid singing. More

1:43

than a decade into her career, Mary j.

1:46

Blige is still searching for peace and

1:48

is determined to find the happiness that has eluded

1:51

her for so long. I don't

1:53

know how to love myself yet, but I'm gonna learn. It's

1:55

not too late for Mary J. Blige to

1:57

fulfill her destiny to carry

1:59

out would you know in her dreams where she knew she

2:01

wasn't gonna have Mary

2:04

Jane Blige's search for solace began

2:06

in January nine seventy one in

2:08

the Bronx, New York. The second

2:11

of two daughters born to Thomas and Cora Blige,

2:13

she saw a life dark side from day one.

2:16

It was a lot going on in the house, and as a kid,

2:18

I'm looking at it like, you

2:21

know, it wasn't good. It wasn't none of it was

2:23

good. It was all like abuse.

2:26

We would fight core and I, you know, verbally

2:28

yawing, physically using

2:31

one another. You know, I grew up with that because I've

2:33

seen that a lot in my life. And you hit me and you're going to get hit

2:35

back. We did more word than physical

2:37

hits, you know, most of the time, if it ain't

2:39

hitting, it was me. But as a father, he

2:42

was a great father to his kids. Yes,

2:45

when he was there, he took farewell

2:47

of his kids, and he loved them.

2:51

Despite their stormy relationship, Thomas

2:53

and Cora both noted on their children, and

2:56

Thomas, an ambitious jazz man, exposed

2:58

Mary to music at an early age, maybe

3:01

one years old, saying Earth went

3:03

and five and hitting the noise.

3:07

She's the sing my father. You know, Mary

3:10

adored him. You know it's

3:13

like, oh, Daddy, Daddy, Daddy, daddy, just daddy

3:15

Dad. But the older

3:17

Mary, God, the less she saw of her father.

3:21

Touring small clubs throughout the U S,

3:23

Thomas Blige started hitting the road for

3:25

months at a time. I was

3:27

selfish, cold blooded, ambitious

3:30

and music with my god. It

3:33

came before my family. It came before my sisters.

3:35

They came before everybody. You know how it

3:37

is when you're young, you know, when you're a man and

3:40

women, money and

3:42

his music and you love music. Music

3:45

gets a lot of people in trouble. I

3:48

just wanted to be with all the women's I

3:50

can be with. By the time

3:52

Mary was nine, her father had already

3:54

moved out of their apartment once, and

3:56

in the summer of nineteen seventy nine, Thomas

3:59

and Cora split for good. It

4:01

was a point where they just couldn't get along anymore.

4:04

And instead of fighting and fussing all the time,

4:07

you know, they both went their separate ways.

4:10

He left forever, you know,

4:12

and and I loved him.

4:14

He was the best thing since I like since

4:17

cook food, you know. And when

4:19

he left, I got angry at

4:21

him because he started something at me.

4:24

He started something at me, and then he just left

4:27

me like that. Short

4:30

of money, Cora moved her girls to a tough

4:32

neighborhood in Yonkers, New York. The

4:35

Slow Bomb housing project was known to its

4:37

residents as Slow Bomb, and

4:39

from day one, it had an explosive effect

4:41

on Mary and her family. From

4:44

that day on, we were savage and it was

4:46

it was every man for themselves, and

4:48

um, we had to like take the fear and

4:51

say, forget the fear. We gotta fight

4:53

for our lives out here. To survive

4:55

the streets, Mary adopted the rigid rules

4:57

of ghetto life, pushing aside

5:00

her femininity. I mean, stuff like that

5:02

turns you into a tomboy. You start hanging

5:04

around guys, you start you actually

5:06

become, you know, one of them.

5:08

The way you sit, where you talk, you

5:10

know, and the way you fight. Trust

5:12

me, Mary is a thug. Mary

5:15

hung out with you know, she

5:17

had her girlfriends, but all the dudes,

5:19

they always came out like with respect, Like

5:22

that's Mary right there, she are, like notice. But

5:25

Mary's tough exterior hit a growing internal

5:28

anguish, one that grew with each slide

5:30

she received from the outside world. Grown

5:33

people were calling me

5:36

big foot, big lips,

5:39

donkey, but you're ugly,

5:42

You're never gonna finish school, you stupid,

5:44

And you reach a point where it's like nobody

5:48

loves me. For Mary,

5:50

there was only one escape from the harsh realities

5:53

of life. She

5:55

just singing the marror early in

5:57

the morning, and you know, she's just always singing.

5:59

Walking through the singing made me

6:01

forget about all my problems and how we

6:03

were living. That was my happiness.

6:06

By the age of ten, Mary was singing regularly

6:09

in a church choir, but the

6:11

poll of the streets soon proved too powerful.

6:14

As a team, Mary abandoned God's word for

6:16

drugs, alcohol and late

6:18

night parties. Our party

6:20

hard as a teenager. I mean, I've experienced everything

6:23

other than I never did crack though. That's the only thing

6:25

that I was like, no way, but um,

6:27

you know from we cocaine

6:30

tabs, stuff like that. You

6:32

know. By the fall

6:34

of night seven, school was getting

6:36

in the way of Mary's partying in personal

6:38

life, so at the age of sixteen, she

6:40

dropped out of high school, leaving her

6:42

mother angry and disappointed. It

6:45

wasn't even the dropping out of school that mee her sick.

6:48

It was just everything. It

6:50

was the you know, the disobedience that

6:53

you know they're doing the drugs, and I guess

6:55

the dropping out of school was like, you

6:57

know enough, that's I'll tell you what I

7:00

said. You don't feel like going to school, don't feel like taking

7:02

care of you anymore. I

7:05

said, that's the deal, right, I said, you don't go to school

7:07

I don't take care of you. And

7:09

that's where, you know, that's when I just said, Okay,

7:11

well, I'm just do what

7:14

I do and do me. Mary

7:16

moved out of her mother's apartment and stayed

7:18

with friends. She moved back in a

7:20

few months later, but she and her mother barely

7:23

spoke still. Even with all the turmoil,

7:25

Mary continued to sing. In

7:28

the spring of at age seventeen,

7:30

she came across a recording booth set up

7:32

for the public at a mall near Yonkers. Mary

7:35

stepped into the booth and sang soulfully into

7:37

the machine. I

7:39

was afraid to hear it back because you hear my voice

7:41

back is like. I didn't like it at that

7:43

time, but you know, everybody loved

7:46

it. Mary had no idea,

7:49

but her spur of the moment song was

7:51

about to change the course of hip hop music.

7:54

Seventeen year old Mary j. Blige seemed

7:57

on the road to nowhere when she made a karaoke

7:59

tape at a New York mall in the spring of a

8:03

tape that Mary soon shared with her mother's

8:05

new boyfriend, Jimmy Dillard. He

8:07

loved it. He was all happy about it, and he

8:09

was like, I know somebody I can help you. I know somebody,

8:12

and I'm looking at him like, like,

8:14

who you know I can help me. The

8:18

man Jimmy had in mind was Jeff Red,

8:21

an aspiring singer and co worker

8:23

at a nearby auto plant. I said,

8:26

okay, well you don't bring a tape, and you know, see what I

8:28

can do. When I heard the tape, I heard a

8:30

lot of pain and a lot

8:32

of joy at the same time, which was

8:34

and still is the voice of young America.

8:38

In July of eighty nine, Jeff signed a record

8:40

deal with Uptown Entertainment, a fledgling

8:42

label that was home to rising stars like Heavy

8:44

D and Joe to See. Although Uptown

8:47

had never signed a female artist, Jeff gave

8:49

Mary's tape to company CEO Andre

8:51

Herrell. When I heard

8:54

her voice, it was so

8:56

beyond anything else I've ever

8:58

experienced or had the opportunity work with.

9:01

It wasn't even I thought about signing

9:03

her. I couldn't wait to sign up. By

9:05

the summer of nine ninety, Mary was a regular

9:08

at Uptown Records Manhattan headquarters.

9:10

There, she struck up a friendship with a young intern

9:13

named Seawan Puffy Combs. I

9:16

didn't have no status. She didn't

9:18

even start her album yet. So we were like both two

9:21

of the low people on the totem poles, just you

9:23

know, hanging out, just talking

9:25

about, you know, our dreams and aspirations.

9:28

While Mary was waiting to record her first album,

9:30

Uptown's A and R director quit, so

9:33

Puffy convinced Andre Herrell to give him

9:35

the job. It was my job to like get

9:37

the artist started that were on the shelves, and

9:40

Mary was one of the artists that had. Our project wasn't

9:42

yet started. It was on the shelf. No

9:44

nobody really knew what to do it. Although

9:47

Mary was appearing on songs headlined by

9:49

other Uptown acts, no one knew

9:51

how to market her as a solo artist typical

9:54

of mainstream R and B. I

9:56

mean, I was just a thug whatever you whatever that

9:58

is, whatever it looked like I was that I

10:01

was not a girl. She's

10:03

straight out the hood, you know what I'm saying, Like,

10:06

you know, she she'll

10:08

fight in a minute, she put it down, should hang

10:10

out all night, you know what I'm

10:12

saying. That the drink of forty, she rolled

10:14

with the guys, She rolled hard. You know, I

10:18

just came as a little tomboy, you know, and

10:20

Puffy took a chance, you know, because he's from

10:22

the same elements, and he knew exactly

10:24

what I was, and he took a chance for me. As

10:28

Puffy and Mary began working together, Mary

10:30

got something going with another uptown artist

10:33

when she began dating Casey Haley of the

10:35

R and B group Joe to See. I

10:38

always wanted this mysterious musician

10:41

that was halfway crazy and handsome,

10:45

you know, the whole thing. I wanted somebody

10:47

like my father. As Casey's

10:50

personal relationship with Mary deepened, Puffy

10:52

had a professional brainstorm.

10:54

Mary's street vibe was combined with her heartfelt

10:57

voice to create an entirely new musical genre

10:59

called hip hop soul. No

11:01

one had ever made a connection. Let's use hip

11:04

hop and R and B together. So between

11:06

Puffy and Mary, they came up with this

11:09

idea and it really really were No

11:12

one had a single real rule. Hip hop beats

11:14

almost to be like, you know, she

11:17

was a rap artist. You know, she was singing

11:20

this girl is so she's from the

11:22

street. She has a lot of different

11:24

things that you can just infuse and make, you

11:27

know, something different. In

11:29

the spring of ninety two, Uptown Records

11:31

released Mary's single Real Love, and

11:34

it quickly became a radio smash. Still,

11:37

it would be months before Mary's debut album

11:40

hit store shelves, and until then the

11:42

R and B Princess would live like a pauper.

11:46

Here. I am a star, don't even know it. Real

11:48

Love is blasting, just going

11:51

up the charts and doing well. But I'm

11:53

still in the projects, walking up

11:55

the hill. No money still

11:58

you know, survive, being still

12:02

fighting, still trying to get out. Everything

12:04

still remains same because we still just approve you

12:07

still have anything. So we were just

12:11

sitting in the house like we

12:14

didn't really didn't understand it that

12:16

it was like for real, but it

12:18

was for real. And when What's

12:20

the four one one hit record stores in the summer

12:23

of nine, Mary's soul driven

12:25

stylings were hailed as funky, gritty

12:27

and relentlessly raw. I

12:30

think it's that emotion and that

12:32

rawness that draw people to marry.

12:35

They feel like when you hear Mary's

12:37

music, you feel as if you

12:40

are experiencing what she's singing

12:43

about. My

12:45

passion for performance and the

12:47

music that I deliver, it's just

12:49

from pain, It's just from struggling. So

12:52

My passion comes from the real deal,

12:54

the truth of the street, the drugs,

12:56

the whole entire thing. With

12:58

a stunning five top ten singles,

13:00

What's the four one One quickly went platinum,

13:03

but Mary would soon discover that success was

13:06

not always sweet. Next oblige

13:08

is adjust to life in the Birds and

13:11

later Mary's misery when

13:13

Behind the Music continues. Twenty

13:20

one year old Mary J Blige had hit it

13:22

big in the summer of ninety two with her album

13:25

What's the four one One? But at

13:27

first the journey from poverty to platinum

13:29

mac seemed unreal. When

13:31

everything happened in the record, you

13:33

know, to golf like it did, it still didn't

13:35

really mean anything, man, because I didn't understand.

13:38

I didn't understand it. But producer

13:40

Puffy Combs did understand Mary

13:43

had the makings of a major star. Despite

13:46

the fact that Mary had only one album to

13:48

her credit, Puppy annointed her the

13:50

Queen of hip hop soul. I

13:53

don't no one really questioned it because

13:55

what she was doing was so unique

13:57

and it was hip hop soul and it was brand

13:59

new. She deserved the tie it off. I

14:02

mean, you know who's gonna do it, and it's never

14:04

been done. He's gonna do it in a big way. And

14:06

when Mary J. Blinde came in as the queen of hip

14:08

hop saw she kicked

14:11

it door down. By

14:13

the fall of ninety two, the money from her music

14:15

was finally reaching Mary, so

14:17

she decided to move her family out of the projects,

14:20

buying her mother and half brother a home on

14:22

a quiet street in suburban New

14:24

Jersey. I'm like, like,

14:27

where the hello we at parent

14:29

like holice every night and

14:32

people outside to music

14:34

playing and all types of stuff in

14:36

my head, gunshot and then to

14:38

just moved to New Jersey, you

14:41

know what I'm saying, Like that scaresy,

14:43

Like the gunsho. I thought, like, all right, that's gun

14:46

shot. But the christ was like

14:50

the home in Jersey was more than a change

14:52

of scene for the Bliges. It was also

14:54

the beginning of a painfully slow healing

14:56

process between Mary and

14:59

her mother. I still really

15:01

wasn't seeing them. I couldn't really deal

15:03

with her. She couldn't deal with me. She was

15:05

still mad at me. I was like, you

15:08

know whatever. Despite

15:10

her status as a platinum recording star, Mary

15:12

J. Blige was still haunted by the damage

15:15

and doubts of her childhood. I

15:17

didn't have any self confidence. I didn't have any

15:19

self love. Everything was hate towards

15:21

myself. So, you know, how could I

15:23

have expectations for someone to love anything that

15:26

I did. I didn't have any confidence and

15:28

what I was doing things were going

15:30

good, But things

15:32

weren't going good. People think because you're

15:34

singing and you got the number one single or your album

15:36

is platinum, everything is happy,

15:39

you know, everything just wasn't happy

15:42

in public. Mary hit her insecurity

15:44

as well. We were still there even though we had

15:46

a little bit of money. Mentally, however,

15:48

we dressed it up, but we dressed it down. It

15:50

was about survival. It was about if

15:52

you say something negative to me, I'm gonna punch

15:55

you in your faith. If you say something negative to me,

15:57

I'm gonna curse you out. As

15:59

her records sales grew, so did Mary's bad

16:01

reputation. She showed up late and even

16:03

drunk to several interviews with the media.

16:06

The Mary J. Blige stories of her, you

16:09

know, demanding this and showing up late

16:11

to that and never taking her sunglasses

16:13

off were kind of legendary. I

16:15

think that a lot of times in

16:18

a city, artists or artists from humble beginnings.

16:21

They feel intimidated by the

16:23

media at first. You know, I

16:25

didn't know I was supposed to respect the interviewer because

16:27

I thought that they were trying to hurt me. I

16:30

thought everybody was trying to hurt Despite

16:33

the turmoil, What's the four one One continued

16:36

it's phenomenal success, eventually

16:38

selling three million copies. In

16:41

the winner of Mary began

16:43

a world tour, sharing the bill with her

16:45

boyfriend Casey. Mary's

16:47

relationship with the singer had evolved into

16:49

a painfully emotional affair. She

16:52

probably looked at Casey as a followed. I'm

16:55

sure she did. She missed.

16:58

Casey and Mary were very interesting. The love

17:00

a fair It was a very dynamic relationship.

17:05

In February of three, during a performance

17:07

on MTV Unplugged, the passion

17:10

and intensity of marrying Casey's relationship

17:12

became impossible to ignore. They

17:15

did MTV Unplugged with Uptown

17:18

and she doesn't duet with Casey, and

17:20

you see it, and that is it,

17:23

Like if you didn't know they were going out, watch

17:25

that video and you did, and

17:28

the song itself, I don't want to do anything

17:30

else. It explains exactly how

17:32

I felt, you know, if I couldn't

17:34

love you, I didn't want to love anybody else. And you

17:37

know, I really did think I was

17:39

in love, you know, you know, but

17:41

things hurt, Things hurt, and especially

17:44

during during performances with him.

17:46

But as they continued the tour, Casey and

17:48

Mary's magnetic chemistry turned

17:51

volatile. I remember Casey

17:53

saying the duet, and he

17:55

was singing to the ladies, and evidently Mary

17:58

felt that he was being a little

18:00

too friendly. And during her intermission,

18:03

I was standing in the audience, and

18:05

you know, five minutes passed, ten minutes

18:07

past, fifteen minutes past. Then if

18:09

I hit me that there must be a beef.

18:12

So I read after and Mary and Cathy

18:15

we're having this screaming met. We

18:18

both were young. There were things running

18:20

through his head, with things running through my head.

18:22

You know, things just weren't

18:25

working to marry. Her

18:27

anguish over case he was directly related

18:29

to her disappointment over another man, her

18:32

father, Thomas. The two had barely

18:34

seen each other since Mary was nine. I

18:37

was mad at him, you know, mad at everything,

18:39

mad at the world, rolled self love, no

18:42

respect for myself. So I was drawing

18:44

people that treated me like I wanted to be treated.

18:47

As Mary's misery deepened, she relied

18:50

more heavily than ever on drugs

18:52

and a blur of parties and people.

18:55

There was a lot of abusers around. There

18:57

was a lot of drugs around, and

18:59

there was a lot of me abusing drugs around.

19:01

There was a lot of me staying up for weeks

19:04

and weeks with no sleep and going to photo

19:06

shoots high. We all were going down.

19:10

In July, Mary

19:12

returned to the studio with Puffy Combs,

19:14

who had formed a new label called bad Boy

19:16

Entertainment after being fired from Uptown

19:19

Records. Puffy encouraged Mary

19:21

to find inspiration in her anguish.

19:24

You get what's to flow on one and we

19:26

address some issues and we basically

19:29

wrote a script for you. But it's now time for

19:31

you to be to the scriptwriter and

19:33

write, really what's going on in your life

19:35

and how you feeling right now? That

19:38

she would just air it out, it would be a

19:40

reason for her to write

19:42

about what she was going through.

19:44

I mean sometimes she would be crying on

19:47

certain songs that it would be crazy hot

19:49

though, because it's the filling behind the song. Within

19:52

a few months, Mary had a number of deeply

19:54

personal songs songs that would

19:56

form the basis of her sophomore album,

19:59

My Life. She had a whole

20:01

body of songs that just opened up her

20:03

broken heart to the whole world. And

20:06

she had a song of the title song of the album, My

20:08

Life, where I

20:10

remember the lyrics he said, if

20:12

you could look in my eyes and see what

20:14

I see. And

20:16

I was ready to die on My Life album,

20:18

I was ready to just end it all and move

20:21

on. So that's why My Life album

20:23

is so very like heart wrenching to people,

20:25

and it grabs him and it makes them cry.

20:27

And because I was really down

20:29

there, you know, I was really calling,

20:32

you know, calling for help. I wanted I needed help,

20:34

you know. In November,

20:37

Mary J. Blige released her second album,

20:39

My Life. It provided

20:42

a painfully open and honest look at the struggles

20:44

that plagued the soulful singer. I

20:46

didn't have any self love during

20:49

My Life album, so I felt like nobody

20:51

loved me. With two

20:53

top ten hits, including I'm Going Down,

20:56

My Life quickly went platinum,

20:58

but with her turbulent relationship with Casey

21:00

coming to an end, Mary was in

21:02

no mood to celebrate. Drugs

21:05

started up heavier than ever, and

21:07

you know. The lack of that, the self love

21:09

was even more effective. So instead

21:12

of taking pills, I figured I'll sniff my life

21:14

away. I

21:16

had to do drugs until I dropped it. I

21:19

remember the sisters skinny, but she

21:22

was like real, real skinny. And I remember

21:24

when I hugged us, I didn't like how skinny

21:26

my sisters hands were, and

21:28

you know, I started crying because I was like, what are you

21:31

doing? You know what's going on,

21:33

you know what's up. But just

21:35

as she seemed on the verge of losing control,

21:38

Mary suddenly got the chance to begin healing

21:40

one of the most painful wounds of her life.

21:43

We did a show in Michigan, and my

21:46

sister said, Mary, Daddy's out there. And

21:49

as mad as I was at him, you know, for

21:51

so long, I went up to him and I just hugged

21:53

him and cried, and I was just happy,

21:56

you know, that he was there. It felt like my daddy

21:59

was home. I told her, I'm

22:01

sorry for being at a

22:04

s s you know, for being

22:06

um selfish.

22:10

And from that day on, we had to learn how

22:12

to forgive and understand

22:14

that nobody owes neither one of us anything.

22:17

We owe it to each other. To love one another. Mary

22:20

began a slow reconciliation with

22:22

her father, only to find herself

22:24

suddenly competing for the attention of Puffy Combs.

22:27

Puffies newly formed record label, Bad Boy

22:30

Entertainment had become a hotbed for up

22:32

and coming talent, like singer Faith Evans.

22:35

It was her and then

22:37

me when he used to be me, and then everybody

22:39

else, and I needed all the attention. I'm

22:41

not saying this, and you know in an arrogant,

22:44

nasty way, but I needed the attention. She

22:47

talked about it on right here on h Okay.

22:49

She she's never nobody knows how why we really

22:52

um broke up. I don't know why we really broke

22:55

I didn't. I didn't know, I started after while

22:57

getting hints. In the spring of nine,

23:00

after weeks of tension, Mary called

23:02

it quits with Puffy, walking away

23:04

from the man who had engineered her initial

23:06

success him in the

23:08

studio one day and was like being

23:12

married on work again. She just

23:14

took control of a situation and see

23:17

all of a sudden went from a young little

23:19

girl to just a woman. Too

23:22

many It was a shocking move, but to marry

23:24

it was a necessary step toward taking command

23:27

of her life. I did

23:29

it on my own because everyone else was like, you can't

23:31

do it without Puffy, can't marry. But

23:34

I didn't care anymore about doing it

23:36

with or without him, because you

23:38

know, I knew that I needed

23:40

that attention and that he was

23:42

given the other, you know, the other female.

23:45

I love you still, but I have to move

23:47

on. But as Mary

23:49

tried to make a new start, she was also dealing

23:52

with some old demons. In July,

23:55

she was profiled in an Interview magazine

23:57

article that quickly became notorious. In

24:00

a conversation with writer Veronica Webb,

24:02

Mary came across as a drinking, cursing

24:05

R and B diva who was always ready to rumble.

24:08

I mean everybody was faxing

24:10

that article xerox. In that article, you

24:12

had to go get that copy of Interview because

24:15

Veronica Webb let Mary j Wise

24:17

have it. Mary says she was shocked

24:20

by the article and felt that Veronica Webb

24:22

and taken advantage of her openness. The

24:25

liquor was off the record. It was all about

24:27

me and her drinking. She was drinking

24:29

with me. Then she gets in

24:31

the magazine and says,

24:33

this is what's bringing Mary j. Blige joy

24:36

nowadays. Oh, I was so heated Veronica

24:39

Webb and says nothing she reported was

24:41

off the record. Whatever happened, the

24:43

incident was another in a series of events

24:45

that caused Mary to question where her life

24:48

was going. I was still

24:50

fighting for my identity and you know, trying

24:52

to figure out who I was and trying to

24:55

get it, but not quite getting it because

24:57

I'm still abusing myself from

24:59

drugs to of men. You know, it

25:02

just seems like everything's like a

25:04

nightmare to her, and I remember her saying,

25:06

you know, this is not worth

25:09

it. In the summer of ninety

25:11

six, in the midst of her soul searching, Mary

25:14

says she had a frightening experience in the world

25:16

of drugs she frequently inhabited. While

25:18

she is reluctant to describe the incident

25:20

in detail, Mary says she found

25:22

herself in a confrontation with someone who

25:25

threatened her life. The breaking

25:27

point was when a person literally

25:29

like the devil showed up and said I

25:31

hate you, I'm I'm

25:33

gonna kill you. And I don't want to go into

25:35

too deep, but let me just say this, when your

25:38

life is in the middle of somebody's hands,

25:41

you I mean, you start realizing there's something

25:43

wrong with me. The terrifying

25:46

scare was an epiphany for Mary.

25:49

I said, I'm nut and I can't

25:51

blame you know, and then you have

25:53

to stop pointing your finger at everybody. Let

25:55

to stop being like you didn't you're the

25:57

reason. You gotta split yourself open,

26:00

start digging, Start

26:02

digging, and the thing that scares

26:04

people. It hurts, yeah, but it

26:07

will hurt if you die tomorrow too,

26:09

So get it together right now so

26:11

you can live long. From

26:14

that moment on, Mary was dedicated to

26:16

improving herself at her career only

26:19

to strong survive. I mean, we

26:21

all do stupid stuff like peer

26:24

pressure. We end up on drugs

26:26

and we end up. But the bottom

26:28

line is you gotta some kind of way

26:30

come out. All I

26:32

know is that one day I

26:35

refused to die. Next

26:37

no more drama when behind

26:40

the music continues. In

26:50

the spring of Mary released

26:52

her third album, Share My World and

26:55

Showcase a woman in the midst of a radical

26:57

transformation. Share My

27:00

World she came out with the first single

27:02

where she plays this executive

27:05

and she's talking to a little girl. Then she goes

27:07

to her office and she's on a runway

27:09

and Mary was showing the world this

27:12

is me. This is a

27:14

diverse woman, a strong woman,

27:17

and a woman who is in control of

27:19

her own destiny. Share

27:22

My World sold two and a half million

27:24

copies, giving Mary the confidence

27:26

she needed to make her own choices at

27:28

her own music. She's

27:30

been in this game and seeing

27:32

it from so many different levels. She

27:34

got a chance to really get out and

27:37

come back and see what really may

27:39

sense. Mary was

27:42

blossoming into a bona fide superstar,

27:44

and when she returned to the studio in to

27:47

record her fourth album, she was surrounded

27:49

by legends like Aretha Franklin, Eric

27:51

Clapton, and Elton John. I

27:54

got a cult from j Boba from n C I reckons

27:56

and said May he was, I'm gonna

27:58

do a song based on Benny gets what I come and playing

28:01

on the record. Uh, And I said absolutely,

28:04

there is no convincing to be done. It was

28:06

something that they all saw as

28:09

a fantastic opportunity and honor if you

28:11

will, Um. There's so much love for Mary

28:13

and so much respect for her talent from

28:16

these great artists.

28:18

She was backed by a star studied cast.

28:20

Mary had a role in writing almost every

28:22

song on the self titled album, and

28:24

the deeply personal record became a musical

28:26

milestone. The bar

28:29

was very, very high because

28:31

Mary knew that this

28:33

was an important record for her. It was her maturing,

28:36

her coming out. She

28:38

kind of blossoms

28:41

slowly and share my world.

28:43

You see a kind of stronger Mary

28:46

and almost with an attitude, and

28:48

then I'm Mary. All of a sudden,

28:50

there's this introspective, spiritual,

28:53

sensual Mary evolving that

28:56

um kind of socked people. It's like,

28:58

wow, the softer side of Mary. The

29:02

album was yet another platinum smash

29:04

for Blige, and the best was yet to come.

29:07

In August of Mary

29:09

J. Blige released her star studied fourth

29:12

album. It revealed the woman

29:14

who was finally finding peace after

29:16

two decades of turmoil. Shaka

29:18

Kan told me one thing, and I would

29:21

never forget it. She said, get out of your bloom.

29:24

Wait. I guess that means

29:26

learned how to forgive you so well,

29:28

whatever it is you can't change, and

29:32

let God take it all us. Mary

29:34

renounced drugs and renewed her relationship

29:37

with God, helping her to heal the rift

29:39

with her father once and for all. My

29:42

dad around the same time and I was on

29:44

drugs. He was on drugs. We both

29:46

were Aaron Drugg at the exact same time. He

29:49

said, I need you to talk to me because there's some things

29:51

that you know that you can help

29:53

me with. I don't take sept the

29:56

spirit of God about

29:58

this disease. I do the listening.

30:01

I'm I'm the child. I listened

30:03

to her, and that made me fall in love

30:06

like and like go back to a little girl

30:08

and grab on his legs and asked him not to leave

30:10

me, because not only was

30:13

he having problem as a grown man, he wanted to get

30:15

advice from his baby girl. That

30:18

means a lot for him. He wanted to get advice for me.

30:21

And I forgive him, you know, for everything

30:24

he's done, because that's what Gods is doing.

30:26

Right out of the dinner and the relationship

30:29

between Mary and her father isn't the only

30:31

one that is mended. Time has brought

30:33

Mary and her mother back together too, esus.

30:37

Sweet. She just ain't married

30:39

to me, that's all I can say, you

30:41

know. And she's a loving

30:44

daughter, very

30:46

much loving daughter. You know, we get along now,

30:49

we get along real good. You know. I love her. She's

30:52

you know, she's the type of one where you gotta let her be

30:54

her, you know, and don't step

30:56

in a way that Mary's

30:58

life has always been mapped out by her musing.

31:01

So when she released her fifth album,

31:03

it was aptly entitled No More Drama.

31:07

No More Drama really reflects

31:09

Mary and her thoughts and really

31:12

is now almost like a travel

31:14

long for where Mary is out in

31:16

her life. Title No More Drama

31:19

comes basically from

31:22

not having a dealing with anything

31:26

that is going to keep me down anymore. Mary

31:28

has turned into this being that loves

31:31

everything and see good in everything.

31:34

Released in August two thousand, law No More

31:36

Drama hit the top of the R and B charts within

31:39

weeks, propelled by the number

31:41

one smash single Family Affair. It

31:44

is powerful evidence that Mary's reign

31:46

is the Queen of hip hop soul has only

31:48

just begun professionally in

31:50

the future asity Mary J. Blige going

31:53

to the Rock and Long Hall of Fame, making

31:55

big records and just cross from

31:57

fields and just you know, being felt all over

31:59

the world. It's not going to be a situation

32:01

where, you know, people get

32:04

tired of listening to Mary. That's not ever

32:07

gonna happen. She's gonna be here until she's ready.

32:09

To retire. With a lifetime

32:11

of drama behind her, Mary says she can

32:13

now look to the future and being a

32:15

role model to those who follow her. I

32:18

feel a responsibility to

32:21

my people to let them know

32:23

that dreams do come true.

32:25

And if you're hanging around dream killers, get

32:28

away from them fast. Nobody in your house

32:30

wants to hear you. But keep singing, keep

32:32

being happy, keep purning, and keeps

32:34

driving because it's never too

32:37

late, and don't let anybody tell you that it's not. Two

32:41

years after No More Drama, Mary

32:44

J. Blige reunited with producer Sean

32:46

Combs for her sixth album, Love

32:48

and Life. In two thousand five,

32:50

she released her seventh studio album, The

32:52

Breakthrough, which was nominated for

32:55

eight Grammy Awards, winning Best

32:57

Female R and B Vocal Performance, Best

32:59

A and B Song, and Best R and

33:01

B Album. In two thousand

33:04

nine, Blige took the stage at We

33:06

Are One, the Obama Inaugural

33:08

celebration at the Lincoln Memorial, to perform

33:11

Lean on Me. Mary J. Blige's

33:13

music reaches across genres.

33:15

She has collaborated with a wide variety

33:17

of musicians, including the Roots,

33:20

YouTube, fifty Cent Drake, and

33:22

Andrea Bocelli. In

33:24

June, Amazon

33:27

Studios released a documentary to celebrate

33:29

the twenty five anniversary of her album

33:31

My Life. Later

33:34

that year, Blige announced the formation

33:36

of her own record label, Mary Jane

33:38

Productions. Three months

33:40

later, she released her fourteenth studio

33:42

album, Good Morning Gorgeous. In

33:45

two, Mary J. Blige

33:48

took the stage at the Super Bowl fifty six

33:50

halftime show alongside Dr

33:52

dre Eminem, Kendrick Lamar,

33:55

Snoop Dogg, fifty Cent, and Anderson

33:57

Pack. Earlier

33:59

this year, Time named Mary J.

34:01

Blige one of the one hundred most influential

34:04

people in the world. Through

34:06

the setbacks, the heartaches, and the

34:08

drama, the Queen of Hip hop

34:10

soul has helped define and expand

34:13

the world of R and B music. Listen

34:17

and subscribe to Behind the Music on the I

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34:21

wherever you get your favorite podcasts. Be

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