0:13

Why what the fuck is up? Chicago?

0:19

Fuck yeah, Island Boys,

0:21

Island Boys, Welcome

0:24

to another phenomenal episode

0:26

of My Mama Told Me, The podcast

0:28

when we dive deep into the pockets of black

0:30

conspiracy theories.

0:32

And we finally worked approve hold

0:34

on, I got a good one.

0:35

We finally worked to prove that Tyler

0:37

Perry was not born but instead

0:40

was genetically engineered in

0:42

a lab.

0:43

From the severed foot of Big

0:45

Mama from Soul Food.

0:52

That might be my favorite one.

0:53

They put that lab,

0:56

they put it in some juice and they let it simmer,

0:58

and we got Tyler Perry.

1:00

That's a sweet, sweet foot.

1:03

That that foot tastes like marmalade.

1:07

How how is everybody?

1:08

You guys?

1:09

Okay? Fuck yeah

1:11

for being here. This is so

1:13

cool.

1:14

I'm Langston Kerman and

1:17

this is if you're if you're unfamiliar,

1:19

some of you feel unsure of what you've

1:21

walked into.

1:23

And that's okay, that makes sense.

1:24

This is not this is a stupid thing that you've

1:27

participated in.

1:28

It's dumb.

1:28

We host the We host a podcast called

1:31

My Mama Told Me where we we unpack

1:34

some of the most stupid and

1:36

offensive conspiracy theories

1:38

circulating in the black community.

1:41

Led. Yeah, that's

1:44

amazing.

1:44

That's our that's our ship. Round of applause.

1:47

If you've heard the podcast before, Okay,

1:54

I love that. There's a bunch of people clapping, and then

1:56

there's one dude standing there and he's.

1:57

Like, nah, is just a.

2:00

He's a huge insecure fan.

2:03

Well then you see my booty hole loosen up,

2:06

losing up.

2:08

Yeah, my mom's seen it. Now what

2:11

she think? She loves the show?

2:14

All right, fair enough? Uh,

2:17

the way this is gonna work.

2:18

We have we have some phenomenal

2:21

guests that are joining us on. We

2:24

have some really fun games that we want to play

2:26

with you, the audience. It's really gonna be

2:28

a real free for all of stupid

2:30

ship. And all we ask

2:32

of you is that you loosen the fuck up and have

2:35

fun.

2:35

Just get drawn.

2:36

Don't be tight, because that we don't need that

2:38

ship.

2:39

Yeah, white guy in the corner, you know about

2:41

it.

2:41

Come on. We

2:46

like to point out all our whites as

2:49

they walk in.

2:52

Get them.

2:55

We should we kick it off.

2:57

I'm excited about this first one very much.

3:00

Yeah, we have We wanted to kick off with a

3:02

with a. We wanted

3:04

to kick off with the dudzy of a conspiracy

3:06

theory, one that that I

3:09

personally have covered in the

3:11

very very early episodes of the podcast,

3:14

but I've never gotten to talk to Bory about

3:16

it, and and frankly, I think there's

3:18

a lot that needs to be said

3:20

about this conspiracy.

3:22

I have so many feelings.

3:23

Yeah, okay, so we'll kick it

3:25

off right away.

3:26

My mama told me that

3:28

if you eat spaghetti from a strange

3:30

woman, she might put a hex

3:33

on you.

3:38

How do you look at

3:42

first of all, I'll eat spaghetti from anyone. Yeah,

3:44

don't.

3:46

Is that true? You don't give a ship where

3:48

your spaghetti comes from.

3:50

I refuse to eat spaghetti restaurants is

3:52

my only thing. WHOA, Yeah,

3:54

I won't eat it. That's home food.

3:56

Okay, you know it's like we ate it

3:58

so much at home.

3:58

I'm not trying to go out and pay money.

4:00

For You're not gonna pay I'm

4:02

not a fucking idiot. My

4:06

mama could make this.

4:07

Yeah, I'm not gonna I'm gonna pay for your

4:09

spaghetti this cause eighty

4:11

eight cents?

4:12

Are you? I

4:14

don't think that that's accurate.

4:16

For a pack of spaghetti.

4:17

I look, I'm not a spaghetti man.

4:19

I don't.

4:20

I can tell. I don't want to be.

4:23

I don't want to be one of those elitist people who

4:25

doesn't know how much milk costs.

4:26

But I feel like it's more than eighty eight.

4:28

Then it's like it's like a dollar twenty. Man, spaghetti's

4:31

the cheapest noodle. Well,

4:34

I can't argue it. Don't be like that, you know that.

4:37

Don't be like that. It's spaghetti and then ramen.

4:39

It's it's so cheap. You think you

4:42

think spaghetti is more less expensive.

4:44

Than round unless you're eating the blue

4:46

box for totally like some kind of mischianopoly

4:49

man. Yeah, that's it's for the bag.

4:52

I'm talking about the bag spaghetti that's.

4:54

Cheap at hell.

4:55

Damn. Yeah, I don't, I don't. I'll

4:58

be honest. I don't really fish.

5:00

I don't really funck with the I don't really fuck

5:02

with my spaghetti in a bag.

5:04

Don't do that to me. Don't do that to me.

5:07

Do not do that to me.

5:08

I do like certain containers.

5:09

Don't everybody's eating it in a bag?

5:12

I have sure, But after

5:14

the point that I stopped having to eat cereal in

5:16

the bag, I was like, no more bags, any

5:20

any food.

5:21

I'm done with bag. Well, I guess that's why I'm a man of

5:23

the people. You

5:26

over here a hoity toity on box

5:29

spaghetti mountain.

5:30

I really, I really rode in on

5:32

my spaghetti horse when I came in.

5:35

I might as well have your peaky in the air, talking like

5:39

the bag.

5:41

Yeah, I don't

5:44

know that I've I had thought

5:46

about this until it was introduced

5:49

as a conspiracy theory, and

5:51

now it's all I think about when I

5:53

eat any kind of red

5:55

sauce base.

5:56

Yeah. So, I

5:59

because I didn't grow up with Did you grow up here in

6:01

this? First of all?

6:02

No, not at all.

6:03

My my father who's here tonight, he's

6:06

here and he's a white man.

6:09

Uh.

6:12

I told you we call out our whites. I

6:14

could tell because he waved with two hands. That's

6:17

how you know.

6:20

But but that's not a that's not a

6:22

common conspiracy theory I think that

6:25

circulates.

6:26

Is it for for our whites? Is that a thing

6:28

that you all had heard not to eat?

6:30

No, that's not a thing that that you I

6:33

think it's a very specific.

6:36

That makes sense because I will

6:38

also say, and this is gonna sound kind

6:41

of bad, I don't believe in

6:43

white women knowing magic

6:51

does that right, Like

6:53

like if a white like, if a white lady is like I'm

6:56

a witch, You're like, okay, whatever, bitch, wow,

7:02

But I am more apt

7:04

to believe it from a black woman.

7:05

That's fair, right, Yeah, I.

7:08

Don't think it's and it's not a bad thing.

7:09

It's just how I feel like because you know, many

7:11

believes in white which right,

7:15

No, that's yeah, they're they're that's somewhat

7:17

fair.

7:18

Yeah, like Regina's specter now no,

7:22

but yeah,

7:27

yeah, that bitch is a witch for sure.

7:29

You don't

7:32

dressed like that.

7:33

If you don't have magic in your life, Yeah,

7:36

you have nothing but turbans.

7:39

Yeah you're away, come on, come

7:41

on.

7:44

Yeah. Okay.

7:45

So, for those that are unfamiliar with this conspiracy

7:47

theory, part of what the the conspiracy

7:50

is is that by receiving spaghetti

7:53

from a woman who you do not know, she

7:55

may put her menstrual blood inside.

7:58

Of the dish.

7:59

It's gotta be spaghetti, yeah, I

8:02

guess, yeah,

8:05

you're gonna notice. Yeah,

8:09

like, why is this feduccini this color?

8:13

Did you make this with vodka sauce? I don't

8:15

understand, but

8:17

yeah, So in theory, she is putting her

8:19

menstrual blood into the spaghetti

8:22

and the hecks. The supposed hecks

8:25

is one that has the potential to make you

8:27

fall in love with her, that you will somehow

8:30

magically fall in love with this person

8:32

from her her pussy spaghetti.

8:36

Oh, ain't you saying it like that?

8:39

I'm just trying to be technical here, dog.

8:42

I feel The first thing I feel about this is

8:44

if you're going to the lengths to

8:47

cook for me and put

8:49

menstrual blood in.

8:50

It, Yeah, maybe I should fall over

8:52

it.

8:55

Why you're very caring.

8:56

Honestly, the mistral blood would

8:58

make it taste good.

8:59

Yeah,

9:03

that's one of those eleven herbs and spices.

9:08

Papa's is always bragging about.

9:16

We're calling upon you because

9:19

we have new merch. We have

9:21

very exciting merch that

9:23

we are now selling and it's

9:26

it's fucking great. We love it so much.

9:28

Just sleek, it's sexy.

9:30

Come on, you want to tell them what we have?

9:32

Yeah, we have three different types

9:34

of hats, which is really fun. We have a two

9:37

tone hat, an alien dad

9:39

hat, the traditional logo in black

9:41

and khaki. Then we have the enamel

9:43

pen with the alien who has a cooofie

9:45

on it. Since my mama told me. And then we

9:47

have t shirts that say proud little

9:50

Mama, which is who you are.

9:51

Yeah, you can buy the merch now,

9:54

go to my mama told me dot merch

9:56

table dot com. It's a brand

9:58

new name, but it's a se merch

10:01

and we would love for you to get some if you haven't

10:03

got it already, and we want

10:05

you to have all the sweet stuff, so get it.

10:11

You know what.

10:11

The craziest thing to me about this conspiracy

10:13

theory is like, when

10:15

did black people start making spaghetti?

10:18

M Right, Like,

10:21

well, there there is and I think

10:23

this is fair to say there is a massive

10:25

difference between black people's

10:28

and white people's spaghetti.

10:30

We can all agree on that.

10:33

And and

10:37

for those that are unfamiliar, if you're not sure

10:39

what the difference is, it's truly a difference

10:42

in number of pots. I

10:46

think that's the core difference is Black

10:48

people absolutely refuse

10:51

to use more than one pot when

10:54

they make spaghetti, and white people are like eight

10:57

pots.

10:58

Spaghetti can't be made without.

11:00

All those pots.

11:06

But yeah, so that's my first question is

11:08

like it makes me feel like then this has

11:10

to be like a fairly recent conspiracy,

11:13

right.

11:13

Well, actually, I remember doing

11:15

a little bit of research on this, and it's not as

11:17

recent as you would think.

11:19

I think that.

11:20

There is a pretty vast history

11:23

of menstrual blood and or

11:25

like parts of our bodies

11:27

being used for for hexes,

11:30

for magic, love potions,

11:32

whatever it may be. And so be it

11:35

hair, be it, menstrual blood, be it. I

11:37

think toenails and fingernails were

11:39

a part of the possible options.

11:41

But all I would not fall in love with that.

11:43

That seems less.

11:45

Just a little foot crunch.

11:46

Yeah, it doesn't seem

11:49

like it comes from the same place.

11:51

Well, that is the Other part of it is that not all

11:54

of it is intended for a love potion. Some

11:56

of it is like hate potions and like

11:58

curses and shit.

12:00

I mean, I wouldn't eat food from somebody I hate.

12:02

Yeah, but maybe they hate

12:04

you and you don't know it.

12:06

My biggest fear.

12:11

By round of applause, who who

12:13

here believes in

12:15

this conspiracy?

12:17

Who actively refuses.

12:23

You?

12:24

You're you absolutely refuse to

12:26

eat the spaghetti of a stranger?

12:29

Fuck?

12:29

Yeah?

12:31

And has it always been this way? Who gave

12:33

you that that line of thinking? Your

12:36

grandma told you that, and you are like,

12:38

you're right, Grandma.

12:39

That's literally the premise of this podcast. You

12:44

can't shave him for that.

12:47

Even mind the premise is loose

12:50

and it's stupid, So yes,

12:52

I can tooch. Yeah,

12:55

so your grandma tells you this, you're like, absolutely,

12:58

and you've never questioned it since.

13:00

And and have you fallen

13:02

in love ever? Okay?

13:05

And but he chose it, and.

13:09

But maybe you didn't and you don't know, maybe

13:11

there was a Okay,

13:16

you're right, you're

13:20

right, fair

13:25

enough, I'm putting the pressure

13:27

in your head there, you know, like,

13:30

bitch, did you curse me?

13:36

What's in this chili?

13:39

Here's my real question about it. Have

13:41

you ever turned down spaghetti for

13:43

that reason? Like been at

13:45

somebody's house and they're like, oh, do you want some spaghetti?

13:48

And you're like, no way, bitch, try

13:51

to trap me.

13:58

Whoa that they were trying

14:00

to heck all you and all your

14:03

high school creds, damn the

14:05

whole basketball team.

14:08

I love that this is coming from a nigga dress

14:11

like Ericabadu.

14:17

He got a shark tooth on his neck.

14:20

Of course, he ain't eating nobody else's

14:23

spaghetti.

14:24

If ever, there was somebody in here

14:28

who was like it

14:30

was gonna be him.

14:32

Yeah, that is true.

14:33

Damn So no spaghetti

14:36

ever from a stranger. When

14:38

and this is I guess the biggest question. When

14:41

you do fall in love, when you've made your chosen

14:44

partnership, are you then will you

14:46

take.

14:46

A lot of pressure on whoever? He said?

14:49

Well? Is this your person? Is this your

14:51

your partner?

14:51

Fuck? Yeah?

14:52

Okay?

14:52

Do you eat?

14:53

And I don't mean to point you out,

14:56

but are you

14:58

now eating spaghetti that she

15:01

makes? Or are you still like we ain't

15:03

here yet. We gotta

15:06

let's keep getting to know each other before spaghetti

15:08

becomes due.

15:10

No spaghetti for the first six months.

15:14

I'll fuck you, but I ain't gonna eat your spaghetti. I

15:21

eat you, but but not just spaghetti. You're

15:24

being crazy.

15:30

I mean, if

15:32

we're talking about this, ultimately I fall

15:35

under the cat.

15:35

I love this.

15:36

I think this is a great conspiracy you

15:39

and once again I I don't

15:41

know, man, weirder shit has happened

15:43

than someone casting a spell.

15:45

Right, So, if I'm hearing you correctly,

15:48

you're saying that that, despite the possible

15:50

risk, you're still down to clown on some

15:52

spaghetti.

15:53

That's not you know, That's not what I'm saying.

15:57

I'm saying that I believe that this could be

15:59

a possibility. I still don't

16:01

eat spaghetti outside of the home, so

16:03

it'd be you're gonna have to come to my house and make

16:05

spaginning.

16:05

I got you if I'm gonna

16:08

get caught.

16:08

It is worth It is worth noting, uh

16:11

that David is currently on

16:13

a tour called bring David

16:15

a Plate.

16:20

That's true, where he.

16:22

Is literally asking audience members

16:24

to show up with a plate

16:26

that they've made at home.

16:29

It sounds so disrespectful what you said.

16:32

It's a cool idea, it's a right idea.

16:35

The other day and the food

16:38

it's fair.

16:38

And now we're love with that man from Houston.

16:44

The other day, a very nice man in Houston

16:47

gave us a pound cake that

16:49

that and we we both ate

16:51

ours privately at midnight and

16:54

then and then next about did each

16:56

other like bro, I

16:59

feel different.

17:02

The first sex that got from LExEN like just

17:04

as I had finished it was like twelve or four.

17:06

It's just all caps. That cake.

17:14

It changed me.

17:15

It was amazing, it was. But you

17:17

could have got us. Yeah, and now

17:19

I'm not gonna eat any spaghetti.

17:20

On this tour.

17:21

You're not gonna eat any spaghetti.

17:22

Any spaghetti people.

17:24

But you you are, you do.

17:26

At least appreciate that this is a real

17:28

thing that could happen.

17:30

Yeah, I like this one. I like this. How

17:34

do you feel about it?

17:35

I think I'll eat whatever. Man,

17:38

Really, I don't think. I think at this point, let

17:41

life happen.

17:42

I don't know.

17:43

I like that because that's what I'm saying about this

17:45

whole thing is like, is there worse

17:47

things? If? If it works,

17:49

it works it.

17:50

Listen, If spaghetti's what tears my marriage

17:52

apart, so

17:55

be it.

17:55

That's what you say, That's how I lost my first one.

18:02

No, I do I think I feel similar

18:04

to you. I like that this exists.

18:06

Yeah, I don't understand the

18:08

uh, the realities right

18:10

like.

18:10

Because it's like, who if it's

18:12

not spaghetti, you eat a lot of things

18:14

and you fall in love with people, you know what I mean. If

18:17

it wasn't spaghetti, it was her macaroni

18:19

and cheese that did it.

18:20

Like, there's many things that could do that. Fuck.

18:22

Yeah, I don't think the mentrual blood part is

18:25

that great.

18:25

But no, it's it's

18:28

pretty icky.

18:28

But it sounds like, uh that

18:31

there's a lot of bodily fluids and

18:33

substances that could have an effect on you,

18:35

so like you can't.

18:39

You can't spend your life in fear.

18:40

So go ahead and eat that spaghetti forget

18:43

free yourself, mister

18:45

Badu, free yourself.

18:51

Did we do it?

18:52

I think we did it. I think that was prettyo.

18:54

We like to just kick it off with the little samplers

18:56

so that everybody feels nice and comfy.

18:59

I think you get the premise of what this.

19:01

You know how far we're gonna go.

19:02

Yeah, well you don't, but you

19:04

think you do. And that's nice.

19:06

That's true. It's gonna get back. Doesn't

19:15

grow chips in your names.

19:18

A Kuala bears are racist, the

19:23

hostal layers, money,

19:27

ships and turkey stuff.

19:29

Y'all can't tell me