0:03

Motherfucking mini years, So motherfucking

0:09

mini years. So yep,

0:14

yep, yep, there it is. There it

0:16

is. Ladies and gentlemen, Welcome to another

0:19

phenomenal episode of My Mama

0:21

Told Me, the podcast where we work

0:23

hard to get to the bottom of all your stupid

0:25

fucking conspiracy theories that

0:27

you send us. Why don't why don't you work on

0:30

some problems we send you for once? How

0:32

about that feels like a one way street?

0:34

Why why we always solving your problems?

0:37

Yeah? I got ship in my life. Yeah,

0:39

we both got some stuff going on that I can

0:41

use your thoughts on. But you know, you just

0:43

come to me and David asking for

0:46

your bullshit to get fixed. Take

0:48

take, take, take take you

0:50

guys, are you discussed me

0:53

with the way that you handle this podcast?

0:55

Boom boom, fuck you. I'm

0:58

your host Langston Kurt and I'm

1:00

David Bory, and we're

1:03

here to do your bullshit. You

1:05

know why this is a mini episode. It's a

1:07

motherfucking mini episode. And

1:09

and god damn it, do we have a fun

1:12

one because we're we're skipping

1:14

the the listener emails

1:17

this week that although we have a bunch

1:19

of fun ones, that I'm excited to dig

1:21

into in future weeks. But Bory,

1:24

you were very excited about a particular

1:27

video that you found on a Reddit thread.

1:29

I believe, if if I'm not mistaken, Yeah,

1:31

I've since gotten off of Reddit. You

1:35

want to tell the listeners what video you

1:37

stumbled upon and and where this is

1:40

gonna take us. It's a video

1:42

of Terence Howard already

1:44

a good start, already a good

1:46

start, and he's in Uganda,

1:49

I believe, telling

1:51

people he's discovered a new form of flight.

1:54

Yes, uh more specifically,

1:56

he's not just telling people, he's I

1:58

believe, telling like government

2:01

officials in Uganda, like

2:03

major power players in Uganda,

2:06

that he is that

2:11

he has discovered a new form

2:13

of flight through I believe

2:16

his study of math and

2:18

chemistry, and it's sort of failures

2:21

in the United States. Marking

2:23

chemistry are one things that aren't broken

2:26

in the United States. It's

2:29

the it's the two things that are still working.

2:33

Yep, they're they're working pretty good. And

2:35

then he flies over there with his side

2:37

part and it's fucking fedora

2:40

and it's goddamn scarf. Because

2:43

you know what, if if I was from

2:45

a third world country, I also would think he

2:47

looks dignified and not like a

2:49

fucking brat's doll. He's

2:53

a listen, he's a classy looking

2:55

motherfucker ish. To me,

2:57

he looks like the devil. I mean, I

2:59

can see that, but it's it's when the devil's

3:01

dressed up in like trying to persuade

3:03

you. It's not the devil after he's like got

3:06

you and he's sticking you with his pitchfork. No,

3:08

this is a green eyed devil. This is Yeah,

3:11

it's a green eyed, gorgeous devil.

3:13

That's that's telling you that he can he

3:15

can make all your dreams come true by teaching

3:17

you to fly like no one else has flown before.

3:20

I hate that he's doing this in Africa

3:23

because they're

3:25

just gonna let it ride because it's crazy that

3:27

Terence Howard there. Yeah, they're

3:29

like, this is fucking cool. The dude from Empire

3:32

showed up. We gotta. I don't think they

3:34

even know that. I don't think they know

3:36

that this dude from

3:38

the dude from best Man Holidays

3:40

there. What do

3:42

you think they know? I think they saw a clip

3:44

of Hustle and Flow. They

3:47

don't even know he's an actor. They think he's a pimp.

3:50

Uh sure, like

3:53

the greatest pimp in American

3:56

history decided to visit

3:58

Uganda. Yes, we'll sit down

4:00

with them. Oh

4:02

man, he it

4:05

means, I mean, how do you feel about it? I have strong

4:07

how do you feel about it? So I was

4:10

really excited you sent this because

4:13

Champs Howard has been a topic of

4:15

discussion multiple times on this podcast,

4:18

namely, we have talked mostly

4:20

about his reinvention

4:22

of math. Are you familiar with the fact

4:25

that he recreated math? I

4:27

am familiar with the majority

4:29

of his exploits. Sure, so

4:32

you know that one plus one does not, in fact

4:34

equal to but one plus one equals

4:37

I believe one. If I'm not mistaken,

4:40

it's either one or three. Either way, it

4:42

ain't correct. But this, this is

4:45

part of the discovery

4:47

that worked Terrence Howard into

4:49

our conversations. Now here's where it gets

4:51

exciting for me, is that Terrence

4:54

Howard is no longer just playing in the

4:56

theoretical What he's saying is

4:58

is that I've study these math equations

5:01

and all the physics and fucking

5:03

chemistry. And did he even go to college?

5:06

He did? He he went for a few

5:08

semesters and dropped out, and he says

5:10

that in the video because he was dissatisfied

5:13

with what they were offering him in terms of the

5:15

solutions. Why are he caught a case

5:20

I don't believe you. I don't believe you

5:22

went to college and we're like, I'm

5:25

dissatisfied at the mathematics.

5:27

I'm gonna go act. I'm gonna go

5:30

being fucking What was his first

5:32

movie, right the bus? I don't know. It

5:35

was probably that swim movie. Yeah,

5:38

I can't do college. I gotta go to being

5:40

Mr Holland's Opus. The

5:47

point is, that's the Chicago guy.

5:50

Yeah, I don't. I don't love that part about it. And

5:54

I'll be honest, Chicago does not put out a

5:56

great batch of mentally sound people.

5:58

If I if I'm being I wasn't really I

6:01

was damn. I

6:04

mean, we're not nailing it. Kanye

6:07

not doing good, Lupe Fiasco

6:10

not doing good, Terence Howard,

6:12

oh boy, Jesse, come

6:15

on, he's spent too much time there and now

6:17

look at him. But he's from l A. Yeah.

6:20

But but his antics because

6:23

antics were Chicago born,

6:25

you know what I mean? Yeah,

6:29

I'm sorry, man, Yeah, it's

6:31

not. None of it's great. But the point is

6:33

is that Terrence Howard is now applying his

6:35

math and that's exciting. I like to

6:37

see a motherfucker start to to really

6:40

like take it out of theory and put

6:42

it into the real world experience.

6:45

Yes, yes, no,

6:47

okay, I know what you mean. It is

6:49

good to take things from

6:51

on paper to in real life. He's

6:54

trying to affect lives and he says

6:56

it in the video because he's talking to these Ugandan

6:58

people and he he says to them,

7:01

this is an opportunity for us to protect

7:03

and save our brothers and sisters

7:06

from being sent into wars, from being

7:08

put in these sort of like difficult positions

7:10

because now we could potentially change

7:12

the way drones fly. And I don't know

7:14

why changing the way drones fly would save

7:17

them from being in wars, but he does,

7:19

and that's exciting. This fucking

7:21

guy, This

7:24

fucking guy, what does that even?

7:28

It's insane like and

7:33

I don't know what it is. I don't know if he's not medicated,

7:35

I don't know. I don't know what he needs to

7:38

be fixed. But this cannot

7:40

continue, right, Yeah,

7:43

I don't know. I I've

7:45

had this argument with a few people about like

7:47

sort of they're gonna make a plane and it's gonna

7:49

crash. Yes they are, and that's

7:52

scary. But

7:55

to his to his credit, it's not a

7:57

manned plane. He's starting with drones. He's

8:00

being a reasonable dude. He's not.

8:03

He's being a reasonable crazy dude.

8:06

Okay, I mean, you know,

8:09

person, here's

8:19

what I'll say. And I've had this argument with

8:21

a few people about about

8:23

sort of the Terrence Howards of the world, the

8:25

Kyrie Irving's a bunch of the people

8:28

who sort of play in conspiracy theory and

8:30

dangerous ways and and sometimes

8:32

unconvincing ways, is that I

8:34

think the core of what they're trying to say,

8:37

even though they do all the bullshit around it, because

8:39

they're wanting for attention and

8:41

starved for a certain level of like

8:43

affirmation that they're never going to be able to fill

8:46

in themselves. I think what they're trying

8:48

to say is every answer

8:50

that we were offered our

8:52

leaders and teachers and government

8:55

is not necessarily a correct answer.

8:58

That we should be challenging the cer's

9:00

in front of us more than just accepting

9:02

everything as fact and true. Okay,

9:07

I believe that when

9:09

it comes to, you

9:13

know, military spending, but

9:16

like there are some things in

9:19

this world that are immutable, like these

9:21

are truths. M you

9:23

know what I mean, Like if you're trying to if you're

9:25

if you're trying to push the line, mathematics,

9:28

isn't the field for that, like in

9:30

the way of like you

9:33

know, you're disproving gravity, Like

9:35

that's where you started, That's

9:38

where you started, Like

9:40

you know, you know what I'm saying. But it's just like

9:42

some things are like there's a

9:45

base level of knowledge that

9:47

has been discovered that we are all building upon,

9:49

and he's trying to like take it out

9:52

at the base. And I think that's like

9:54

because he's stupid and hungry for attention.

9:57

M hmm. So here's the question that I

9:59

have for you. Would you

10:01

be on board if

10:04

somehow, let's say, theoretically,

10:07

Terrence Howard does in fact come

10:09

to be correct about any of this. Are

10:12

you going to to apologize

10:15

publicly for that and be on

10:17

board for Terrence Howard flights or

10:19

are you truly just gonna be an anti Terrence

10:22

Howard dude all the way to the

10:24

end. I want to talk

10:26

slowly so you can quote me exactly

10:29

as I've said it. Oh, this is anxciting

10:32

I will never lie

10:35

on that cuckoo red bones

10:38

planes. Not one day

10:40

in my goddamn life, I

10:43

refuse. I

10:46

would rather eat two

10:49

cups of Tracy

10:51

Morgan ship to

10:55

full baking cups, keeping

10:58

cups. I would rather get

11:00

my body fucking

11:02

fun. I will die all this

11:05

psychopaths, fucking planes never

11:08

ever, ever ever,

11:12

fuck him, Fuck you, Terrence

11:14

Howard. Oh man, Oh,

11:17

this has gotta break Terrence Howard's heart.

11:20

I didn't give a ship. He's

11:22

never gonna be able to convince you. And

11:25

I've watched every episode of Empire.

11:27

I still feel that way. And

11:30

to be without you video and all the

11:32

bullshit he's been in, Oh

11:34

New York Undercover. You're so

11:36

passionate about this Jackie Jackson

11:39

and the Jackson's an American dream, all

11:41

that ship, fuck

11:43

him,

11:45

fuck him, and fucking for taking this nonsense

11:47

to Africa. Take that ship to fucking

11:50

Eastern Europe. But the poor

11:52

white people deal with it. And that

11:54

that is where I listen. I

11:56

would take of Terrence Howard flight. I

12:00

want to be in the air main wherever

12:02

he's taken me, you know. But I

12:04

will say to your point, that

12:07

is where I start to take issue with it, is

12:09

that I feel like Africa often becomes a

12:11

easy target for all of our

12:13

bullshit, and I would love for us

12:15

to be targeting equally poor, equally

12:17

stupid sort of like not stupid

12:20

people, but certainly stupid access

12:22

points of information. Right,

12:25

They're smart people that are being taken advantage

12:27

of because of the ease

12:30

of these access points, mostly created

12:32

by rich, wealthy countries. And

12:34

so I want you to to your point, taken to fucking

12:37

like Bulgaria or wherever

12:39

the funky. Yeah, but you because

12:41

they saw you a big Robin's house. You're gonna

12:45

buck over the people of Uganda

12:47

because you were in Biker Boys. Yeah,

12:50

I have his filmography open. I was gonna

12:52

say, it's starting to feel like the IMDb is

12:54

up and you were the worst part to get

12:56

Richard, oh boy,

12:59

And that's wild.

13:04

No Jails was a stupid movie.

13:06

No iron Man, You're not gonna mention iron Man at

13:08

all. I don't really funk with movies like

13:10

that. Oh shit, Yeah,

13:12

well it would. It may make you feel good

13:15

to know that the Marvel movies were very

13:17

unkind to Terren soured and it's

13:19

the reason why he no longer is welcome

13:21

on any of those sets. Yeah,

13:24

apparently he was not well

13:26

loved while he was filming, but

13:29

then when he went to go become

13:31

because you know, he was supposed to be Don Cheatle's

13:33

part in the Marvel films,

13:36

and in fact was in the original films

13:38

and was replaced by Don Cheatle. And

13:41

part of what happened was in the original

13:43

film he didn't make a lot of money,

13:46

but then later went back to renegotiate

13:49

and they were like, no, we're not giving you

13:51

a lot more bread. And he was like, that's

13:53

crazy. I'm gonna call Robert and

13:56

and Robert Downey Jr. Wouldn't pick up

13:58

the phone, like true, like ghosted

14:01

him. And then he ended up getting replaced

14:03

with Don Cheeto. Okay,

14:05

well, shout out to Don Cheeto from

14:08

Denver went to the same high school

14:10

as Troy Walker Don Cheetos from from

14:12

Denver. Yeah, he went to East High School. Whoa

14:16

you know we went again. And

14:20

Terrence Howard fund yourself, Well,

14:23

god, damn, this is this

14:26

has gotta be devastating for Terrence Howard.

14:28

He's lost half of my Mama told me vote,

14:31

you're still voting for him. I'm still voting for him.

14:33

I'm still rooting for that light eyed

14:35

angel to to save us. He

14:37

said he's using hydrogen. He

14:40

said, we're gonna fly with hydrogen. That's exciting.

14:42

Does that I don't know? I

14:45

don't. I don't know that he knows. But

14:47

he said that the hydrogen is

14:49

gonna help us fly different. And so

14:51

I gotta find out what that means. I gotta see it all

14:53

the way to the end. Is where I'm at with Terrence Howard.

14:56

I'm not gonna bail on him. Halfway through

14:58

his his speech. I

15:00

think, and I think that this might be a light skinned thing,

15:03

and I and I commend you for it, because if

15:05

the shower on the other foot, if this was

15:07

Project pat and

15:09

would I would be like, wait, yeah,

15:14

come on, So I you know

15:16

what, I understand. I'm not even mad at you. When

15:18

Daniel Kalula eventually goes

15:21

crazy, you're gonna turn on him.

15:23

He's

15:26

gonna go crazy. Nobody

15:29

gets to be this successful, this

15:31

fast and doesn't go crazy. It's gonna

15:33

be just fine. He's gonna he's

15:36

gonna quit acting in fifteen years and settle

15:38

into a life of politics where I will

15:40

vote for him

15:43

or where whatever he's gonna run for. All right,

15:45

Well, not me, I'm gonna team voting for for Terence

15:48

Howard as UH as president.

15:51

I don't know why he's over there or what

15:53

he's got playing, but but he's got

15:55

my vote because Hydrogen's involved.

15:58

I get it. Well.

16:03

I think we did it. I think I think this covers

16:05

everything we needed to do to update everyone

16:07

on Terrence Howard and his shenanigans. Could

16:10

you tell the people at home where they can find you and what

16:12

you got going on? Uh? Find me

16:14

on Instagram and cool Guy Jokes CD seven

16:16

all list on my shows there. September,

16:19

come and see me at the Allegian Theater

16:22

in Los Angeles. I'm running

16:24

my new Hi. Honestly, I taped

16:26

it. It's like fifty three minutes, but I'll do some

16:28

crowd work. I'll feel the hour. And then

16:32

October twenty two, come and see Lenks and

16:34

Kerman and Faded Comedy Denver

16:37

and that's all I got. Hell yeah

16:39

to go see David didn't see me Whenever

16:41

you want to, And I'll be at the Allegian Theater a

16:43

few more times in August, I

16:46

believe the August, in

16:48

August twenty nine or the dates that

16:50

I'll be there. Uh and otherwise

16:52

you can see me bullshit around l A and a few

16:54

other places in the interim l And

16:56

if you want to send us your own drops, your own conspiracy

16:59

theories, you're own thoughts on what Terrence

17:01

Howard has going on, please send them to my

17:03

Mama pod at gmail dot

17:05

com. We would love to hear from you. That's

17:07

it, bye, bitch. Motherfucking

17:13

mini years. So many

17:16

years, so, motherfucking

17:18

mini years, so, motherfucking

17:24

mini years. So many

17:27

years, motherfucking

17:29

mini years. So