0:00

This is a Headgum Original. This

0:13

Christmas, for the first time, America's

0:16

most exciting and legendary motion picture

0:18

hero comes to the screen like

0:21

you've never seen him before. The

0:24

back! In an all new, larger

0:26

than life feature film. Now,

0:29

the dark knight confronts his newest

0:32

and most menacing villain. Your

0:34

angel of death awaits. The

0:37

Phantasm. I want you. And

0:40

faces his greatest danger. Can't

0:45

be too careful with all those

0:47

weirdos around. The

0:50

soaring new adventure. Batman.

0:54

Mask of the Phantasm. The

0:57

animated movie. Coming for

0:59

a Christmas you'll never forget. The

1:36

Batman Mask of the

1:38

Phantasm. I'm

1:41

Nicole Byer. And I'm Lauren Lapkus. And

1:43

this season we are covering the Batman

1:45

movie. Yep, this is the fourth episode

1:48

of the sixth season. We're working our

1:50

way through the movies of the Batman

1:52

universe with the help of newcomers, superfans

1:54

and maybe people who've contributed. Now,

1:56

there are going to be 14 episodes this season

1:59

culminating in a very exciting live stream

2:01

episode. Every time you say very exciting, because

2:03

I'm also like, what are we doing? I

2:05

actually don't know. So I'm like, I'm

2:07

like, I'm like really pushing it, but I'm like, I don't

2:09

know. I don't know either. I know

2:11

we've been told, again, our memories are

2:13

not amazing, but okay, we'll cover as

2:16

much as we can get to, but this is an

2:18

overview of the franchise. We can't get to everything. We

2:20

certainly can't. There's so much Batman. So

2:22

we're gonna discuss today our first animated

2:24

movie of the season, the

2:27

1993 Batman Mask of the Phantasm

2:29

starring Kevin Conroy. Yup. Okay. So

2:32

Mask of the Phantasm is available

2:34

with a subscription to Mac's Hulu

2:36

Prime video. You can watch it

2:38

for a fee on Apple TV

2:40

or Google Play or Voodoo. We're

2:42

gonna spoil it. Yeah, obviously. So

2:45

we're so excited for our guests

2:47

today, the Doughboys. Nick Weiger

2:49

is a comedian, writer and producer of shows like

2:51

At Midnight, I Love You America and co-host

2:53

the podcast, How Did This Get Played? Mike Mitchell

2:56

is a comedian, writer and actor who has appeared

2:58

in Love and The Tomorrow War and

3:00

you were really good in that. You were. They come

3:02

together to eat and be funny on the

3:04

Headgum podcast, Doughboys, which I'm a super fan

3:06

of. It's a great podcast. Welcome back, you

3:08

guys. Thanks for being here. Thank you for having us.

3:10

Thank you for having us. It was a true treat. I'm

3:13

very, I mean, we'll

3:15

get it. I'm just gonna say like Anya

3:18

told me what you were doing for the,

3:20

you were doing Batman, told me the topic. And

3:22

I immediately said, are you doing Mask of

3:24

the Phantasm? And I was like

3:26

a little bit of like a little shit eating grin. And

3:28

she was, I think, gilted into saying like, do you want

3:30

to guest on it? So you made

3:32

this happen. I kind of made this happen. And then she was like,

3:34

you too, Mitch. I was like, what the fuck? I

3:37

gotta do this too? Yup.

3:41

You're a pair. I'm happy to

3:43

see you two, but I've never. You have no

3:45

connection to this film. I have no connection to

3:47

the film. I never have even seen it until

3:49

last night. But you're my friend, you're my good

3:51

friend. And I thought it would be like, this

3:53

is the way you can watch that movie and we

3:56

can get a fresh take. Yeah. And you don't do

3:58

anything without him. That's true. That's very true. We

4:00

don't think it is helpful. You can be like I can't

4:02

do if Nick can't do it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It is

4:05

good. Oh, that is nice. It gets you out of self.

4:07

Yeah. Oh, he said he couldn't, so...

4:09

So, wait. Nick, are you a Batman head? Well,

4:11

okay. I like Batman a lot. I'm

4:13

not like a Batman super freak, but

4:16

this is my favorite Batman movie. I

4:18

think this is this movie and then... This

4:20

is her favorite Batman out of all of

4:23

them? Favorite Batman? You like it more than

4:25

Batman Returns, which so far is my favorite? Batman Returns

4:27

is great. Also another good one. That's not

4:29

even the hottest it takes. There are a lot

4:31

of Batman fans who say this is the apex

4:34

of Batman cinematically. That's like, wow. This

4:36

is the Batman version. A lot

4:38

of that is affinity for Kevin Conroy, who you mentioned,

4:40

who is the voice of Batman, who is like, I

4:42

think, the best Batman. And he passed away last year,

4:45

right? Fairly recently, yeah. I

4:47

remember reading that and he was fantastic. That's

4:49

interesting. Is that a big part of why

4:51

people love this one so much because it's

4:53

him? I think there's a there's a there's a

4:56

there's a fandom for Batman the Animated Series, which

4:58

is like the movie of the animated series, which

5:00

a lot of people love. Which

5:02

I did watch, by the way. You also watched it.

5:05

I watched it, yeah. And I watched it as a kid and I

5:07

love that series and I think that's like, again, a great representation of

5:09

Batman. I think there's also a little

5:11

bit of the like, hmm, it's my,

5:13

oh, my favorite is Batman Mask of the Phantasm. Like

5:15

that is my favorite, but I think there's a little

5:18

bit of the like, like, what? I'm a true fan,

5:20

so I have a little bit of an off the

5:22

beat. A bit of sophistication? Yes, exactly. Yes, yes,

5:24

yes. Yeah. This is straight to DVD. Is that

5:26

what? No, this was released theatrically. Really? What?

5:29

This was a real what? They're home? This was in

5:31

the theater? Well, not enough people. It

5:33

kind of bumped. But they had this was they were going to

5:35

be, I think, I think it was going to be a two

5:37

or three part episode. And then they were like, well, let's make

5:39

this a direct to video movie. And

5:42

then they were like, you know what? Let's release it

5:44

theatrically. And it wasn't directed DVD because it was pre

5:46

DVD. In fact, I own the VHS of this movie.

5:49

I feel that it was wrong to put it in theaters. I agree, too. It

5:52

doesn't feel like it would be. Well,

5:54

it's like the 1966 Movie

5:56

in between the first and second season. They

5:58

Like released that in theaters. It or the that

6:00

didn't do well regular. Expert level and you and

6:02

I guess is that the I I know. So

6:05

much as organ music c. Sex Think Batman.

6:07

He's a Sicilian. It's are you that head

6:10

or you our grammar quite a bit. I

6:12

I I don't have a real bad head.

6:15

But. I loved the in America had. Mobile

6:18

ad. And penis

6:20

character as they serve Doughboys Bad had some

6:22

of his father. On

6:25

your wall there was no one of

6:27

those I was very much as it

6:29

was. Definitely have to disagree with more

6:31

and they have like feral father. Was

6:34

really bad. Had a like like season of newcomers

6:37

at all. We just don't. Have

6:39

that had was like hey, it's basically like

6:41

a big poster. The Alibi: A big sticker.

6:43

It's like it was like kind of like

6:46

a handy size sticker of a of a

6:48

sudden when you're a fan of America by

6:50

now Iverson. On your back or newsworthy a

6:52

James worthy it's after. it

6:54

was a is it would as he could maybe be

6:57

bigger his of their porn up that has a. While

6:59

I've never heard as his loyalty. I had

7:01

know that is not a sad how down allow

7:03

Iran had to the the other they are okay

7:05

My neighbor had one of the there's a dogs

7:07

that have as like john seen or something. So

7:10

it's like a canal. Yeah, it's like

7:12

a sandy of a guy but you put

7:14

her on your wall in your bedroom. Sex

7:16

Couples describes it was a script fab. I

7:18

would use Rak one. I went on Strike

7:20

Zone. Or

7:23

odds are as I say, I mean

7:25

same that so far. as with all.

7:27

My life with this is. What

7:31

is why? is? So.

7:37

Why? Are

7:39

the only ones which is it had a donkey. We

7:42

talked about this would threaten sort of become human

7:44

I know that that was like a plot of

7:46

the said he to the see their homes whom

7:48

an insect to i know guys out to be

7:50

hims human insect to and then he realizes like

7:52

it's not who is supposed to be He spoke

7:54

at. What is human track look like. ah

7:56

like miss honestly about it looks like a

7:58

handsome big Yeah, he looks like Mitch. I

8:01

don't wanna see, I don't like when, Like

8:03

when the beast is a man, it's like disgusting. It's

8:06

like, I'm gonna charge you to the beast now. Don't

8:08

change, like don't be a guy. A

8:11

blonde guy, I was like, you're not

8:13

blonde. Kind of too pretty. Yeah, sure.

8:16

Yeah, pull up a human track. We

8:18

gotta see. I'm afraid of

8:21

what will come up. Something deformed him. Oh,

8:23

he actually is kinda hot. Yeah,

8:25

okay, yeah, he can get it. All right, nevermind.

8:27

And the ladies love him. He's like a little too much.

8:29

I take back what I said though. And maybe

8:31

the teeth I don't love. If it was between

8:33

him and monster Shrek, which one are

8:36

you? Ooh, monster Shrek. I take the guy. There's

8:38

Shrek with the human body and the Shrek head

8:40

there. Well, that is a thing for someone. Now

8:42

that's what I want. That's both worlds. He's

8:45

best at both worlds. Okay,

8:47

well that's- Fiora turns into a Shrek, she

8:49

never, She turns into, that is her real

8:51

form. She was a Shrek all along. A

8:53

lady, yeah. She was a lady who then

8:56

turned into a Shrek. Oh, what?

8:59

Yeah, he rescues her, they kiss, and

9:02

then she turns into a Shrek. Yeah, wouldn't you be like, you

9:04

turn me into a monster and be mad? But they

9:06

look alike, so it's like how couples- Look,

9:08

I don't think I got the message of the story.

9:10

I knew this was gonna happen when I asked you

9:12

if you wanna do a show with me, to turn

9:14

into a fucking Shrek newcomer. You're gonna talk about Batman,

9:16

I'm talking Shrek 2. All right, to answer

9:18

the question, I am a bit of

9:20

a bad head. I watched the animated series. I

9:23

never saw this movie because my parents were probably

9:25

like, no, we're not gonna go take you to

9:27

a 75-minute animated movie. So I didn't

9:29

see this, I did not see this in theaters. I

9:31

didn't see this in theaters either. In fact, I

9:34

didn't see this until I was out on a home video. Not many

9:36

people saw this in theaters. In fact, I don't think I even

9:38

knew it had a theatrical run at the time. I mean, we'll

9:40

get into all of it, but it's a

9:42

pretty slow vibe to this. It's so slow.

9:44

It's like there's a second between each line.

9:46

Yes, all of the Batman things I have watched,

9:49

the second half of the movies seem good.

9:53

And I'm like, why can't the first half be interesting?

9:56

This one, well, I really didn't see the

9:58

twist coming, but I guess I'm dumb. You're

10:00

not dumb. You're not dumb. It's well

10:02

written. Yeah, it's well done. Yeah, you're not um,

10:04

that's why I didn't know It was so

10:06

well done. Yeah, so okay. Let's

10:09

just talk about your DC comic connection Do

10:11

you care about other things besides Batman or

10:13

is it kind of just like you're you're

10:15

dipping your toe here and there? I like

10:17

the DC verse. I like I like DC

10:19

and I like and I think I Lean

10:23

towards DC movies then I also

10:25

have chocolate on my shirt Just I want to point

10:27

out in case people see it. All right. Um, it

10:29

doesn't look like chocolate It

10:31

looks like makeup or something. Yeah, let's see

10:34

your makeup came. I smeared on you.

10:36

No chocolate It

10:38

was a kind bar. We discussed it was a

10:40

part of a kind bar. It's fine. Chocolate. That's

10:42

not fun That's what I said. Yeah healthy

10:44

chocolate. It's actually really healthy. Yeah, I ate

10:49

one right before bed We

10:52

like video this show oh But

10:55

don't we go a little in the clip, but you know,

10:57

why did you tell Mitch that I really

10:59

enjoyed him looking at the camera Got

11:07

chocolate on here. Um,

11:09

I don't care I

11:17

Was a DCM and I love spider-man spider-man

11:20

spider-man and x-men were both big for me

11:22

So a little little of the Marvel. Well,

11:24

what's your favorite DC person Batman?

11:26

Okay, we went through this It's

11:29

Batman Superman By

11:32

Wonder Woman Wonder Woman Aquaman,

11:35

but it was in there Spider-man

11:37

is not spider-man is Marvel. Are there black

11:40

people in DC? Yeah. Yeah,

11:42

I think it who specifically

11:47

Yeah Which

11:49

guy in the in Batman or Batman returns

11:51

this one was it where he's he's not

11:53

the mayor or he's something I can't remember

11:55

Oh two faces played by in

11:58

in the first Batman's is played by the the

12:00

great Billy Dee Williams. Right. Yeah.

12:03

Jinks. Mm. Okay, and then

12:06

are you more of a DC or Marvel guy? See, here's

12:08

the thing, I'm not much of a comics guy. I

12:10

really like, my fandom of Batman

12:12

is through the movies and TV shows. I had to look

12:14

down and see what this was. I didn't know if it

12:16

was a comic related to that. Yeah, what is it? No,

12:18

this is Bobby Bacala from The Soprano. Nice. Yeah.

12:21

It's a great shirt, really good. God

12:23

bless you. Yeah, so I

12:26

never, like I read some of the, I

12:28

noticed some of the bigger, well known Batmans, like

12:33

the, what was it, The

12:35

Dark Knight Returns, or like Year One, but it's

12:37

not like, I had this comprehensive

12:39

knowledge of the character. What's Year One? Okay,

12:41

so Year One is partially adapted in this

12:44

movie, and it's like, this was like Batman

12:46

starting off. It was like his first go

12:48

at it. And so when he's got the

12:50

shitty suit, he doesn't have the actual Batman

12:52

cowl, and

12:54

he's just trying to figure it out. That's like kinda Year

12:56

One shit. I like cowl.

12:58

Year One, I thought about that caveman movie.

13:02

Yeah. That was a comic, dude. That was

13:04

also a comic. He's done

13:06

Batman. All right, well let's

13:09

give our quick thoughts. I think it's kinda clear where we

13:11

stand before we get into the whole movie,

13:14

Nicole. This movie was awful, okay? Wow.

13:17

I don't think I can be convinced

13:19

otherwise. It was confusing, it

13:21

was slow. They had a

13:23

black character say, you can't say the M

13:25

word to him. What a wild

13:28

choice. You didn't even see that. It's when

13:30

the women were together, and I was like, this is nuts.

13:33

That's crazy. I wrote it down, and I was

13:35

afraid to even, I was like, it's so weird

13:37

that I was afraid to bring it up. But

13:39

I was watching, I was like, this is weird,

13:42

right? It was so bizarre. What was the M

13:44

word? Marriage. Marriage. And then another lady's like,

13:46

what about the I word? And they're

13:48

like, what? And she's like, engagement. And

13:50

I put it out. This

13:52

lady needs help. Wait, this is a

13:54

thing, because I had subtitles on, and was

13:57

staring at the TV, never looking away, and I don't know

13:59

what you're talking about. I'm like, so

14:01

this is the sequence where

14:04

he's having a gala and he's got

14:06

two babes on his arm. Oh, right,

14:08

right, right. I was actually talking

14:11

during that because I was like, is

14:13

Betty and Veronica from DC? Because these look like

14:15

Betty and Veronica. And Michael's like, I don't know. And I

14:17

was like, okay. Wait, are they DC? I don't know. I

14:20

think they're Archie comics. They're Archie comics. But

14:23

there's some weird crossover with Archie. That's why

14:25

I think there's a DC crossover. I

14:27

vaguely feel like that on the comic

14:30

book or something. Yeah, they're directly referenced here.

14:32

If it may be a homage. I thought

14:34

they looked like them. So I talked directly

14:36

over those lines. It would be funny if

14:39

Archie came to the Batman's party, Bruce Wayne's

14:41

party. Yeah, I like a mashup. All

14:44

right, well, let's take a quick break. Oh, wait, no, we didn't

14:46

hear it. Nick, you obviously love it. And I had a hard

14:48

time. And you've

14:51

had such an open mind this whole time. I really

14:53

have. And I've enjoyed everything up till

14:55

now. And I was excited because it

14:57

was what, 70 minutes? That

15:00

got us really excited. Watching it, it felt like eight

15:02

hours. Yeah. Wow. Yeah.

15:05

It's I didn't my first watch. I didn't love

15:07

it, I guess is my thought on it. But

15:10

we'll get into it. Okay, let's take a

15:12

break. We'll be back with our Batman summary

15:14

where we will hear every single thing that

15:16

happens in this. We both think that

15:18

the cameras are rolling. I mean, I glance at them. It's hard not to

15:20

look at that. Yeah, because there's camera. Yeah. And

15:22

we're like, and we're performers. And we're like, oh, yeah. And

15:25

we're like, oh. Hey, everybody. Are

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18:44

we're back. Batman, Mask of

18:46

the Phantasm was released December

18:48

20th, Christmas Day? Christmas Day!

18:50

Who's leaving their home? Is

18:52

it a bold choice on

18:55

Christmas Day to move presents? Or do

18:57

they throw things there that they think won't do?

18:59

I mean like what's the... They're big Christmas

19:01

Day releases. I feel like that's always like

19:03

here's a big, like we're gonna try a

19:05

big swing on Christmas. I think like that

19:08

was a bad idea with this movie.

19:10

Yeah. Again, yeah, it's

19:13

just like, I don't know

19:15

when you released this movie. Honestly, I think maybe just

19:17

in 1993 you just don't release it theatrically. Yeah, I

19:19

think that's the problem. But I also

19:21

think Summer would be better for them. I think Summer would have

19:23

been better. This is written by Alan, Paul, Martin

19:26

and Michael. Okay, no last name. The

19:29

guy directed by Eric

19:32

Radomski and Bruce

19:34

Timm. Okay, so thank you again

19:36

to the Batman fandom wiki for help with

19:38

this summary. We love you

19:40

guys. We love you. They're gonna be

19:43

so mad. They used

19:45

our info against us.

19:47

Like on this episode.

19:51

So when Batman, Ken Conroy? Was that

19:53

what it was? Kevin Conroy. Okay, when

19:55

Batman, Ken Conroy busts the counterfeiting

19:57

operation. Gangster, Chuckie.

20:00

Kevin. Is it Kevin? It's Kevin.

20:03

It says Ken. Exactly. Yeah.

20:06

I was going to say Batman fandom wiki. Yeah, yeah.

20:08

That's their type of. You guys. It's

20:10

so funny because you were like, Ken Conroy. Is it

20:12

Kevin? And then Liger was like, yes, you

20:14

would. Ken Conroy. I said Ken?

20:16

I didn't know that. Oh, I didn't even hear myself.

20:18

I didn't get why you guys laugh. That's so funny.

20:20

Okay. Okay. When

20:23

Batman, Kevin Conroy, busts a

20:25

counterfeiting operation, gangster, Chucky Soul,

20:27

Dick Miller, attempts to make

20:29

his getaway on wheels from a high

20:31

rise parking garage. Chucky is confronted

20:34

by a figure in a cape, which he assumes to

20:36

be Batman. It is not. Soul

20:38

tries to run down the threat with his car,

20:40

smashes through the wall of the parking structure and

20:42

crashes into an adjoining building, dying on impact. We

20:45

assume, I guess. Witnesses jumped to the

20:47

conclusion that the culprit is Batman. Fueling

20:49

the anti-bat bias is councilman Arthur

20:51

Reeves, played by Hart Buckner. Reeves

20:54

is contacted by an old friend, Andrea

20:56

Beaumont, Dana Delaney, who is heading into

20:58

Gotham City. Now, Andrea is very hot.

21:01

Yeah. Cartoon character is

21:03

very, very big. Very hot. It's

21:05

got, and also like, you know, a big part of what

21:07

I like about Batman, the animated series in this movie is

21:09

I kind of got this like retro art

21:12

deco aesthetic. I like that. Is

21:14

this sexy? Well, no, but this

21:16

movie is sexy. His ass is sexy, buzzed.

21:19

This movie is sexy. This movie is horny.

21:21

It is. And she's like in her,

21:23

in this like sort of 50s look, she's got like those

21:25

50s pointy boobs. Pointy

21:27

boobs. A very specific. Sweater girls, as

21:30

they, as they call it. Oh

21:32

yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's

21:34

sweater girls. There was a term in the 19, it was like a,

21:36

was it a 40s or even a 30s thing? Sweater

21:39

girls and they would wear like, it's like

21:41

when they had big busts. Oh, and it

21:43

would be like buttoned right under the chin

21:45

and then like. They're their pointy colors. They

21:47

were just like, yeah, they're sweater girls. Yeah.

21:50

Tell me out here on it. It's real. No,

21:53

I'm sweater girls. No, you're right. It's a 40s.

21:56

It's a 40s thing. Okay. It's

21:58

like they would wear like tight sweaters. Yeah,

22:00

yeah, yeah. Sounds like a good sign of a

22:02

sweaty girl. I wish I

22:04

lived in the 40s. You got the gum? You

22:08

getting to wear any best sweater girls? She

22:10

is a... Andy as they call her

22:12

is a babe, right? Andy as you call her? As

22:15

Batman calls her. Okay. She's a

22:17

babe. Yeah. So Batman...

22:20

Oh, there we go. There's a sweater girl. Oh,

22:22

yeah. That's hot. It makes sense. But

22:24

then I think what confuses me a little bit is

22:26

once you take the bra off, you don't have pointy

22:28

boobs anymore. No, then you're disappointed. You're like, why are

22:30

these round? Why are they not pointy and hard? So

22:33

Batman... I'm always questioning that. Yeah, I

22:35

know. Hey, Batman, who's asking her? So,

22:41

Arthur Reeves asks Andrea whether she's planning on

22:43

looking up her old friend, Bruce Wayne. Dropping

22:46

the In Flight magazine with Bruce on the

22:48

cover, she calls the relationship ancient history but

22:50

a flashback tells otherwise. Well, yeah.

22:52

The flash question is about... That's so

22:54

hard. I have questions about timeline. So are we...

22:57

Yes. That's a huge question.

22:59

Yeah. Are they in college? Well,

23:02

during the flashback? Yeah. Yeah.

23:05

Exactly. I think they're like...

23:07

It's just early life. I don't know if it's

23:10

specifically college. Because she's like, I see him on

23:12

campus. Yeah, she said campus at one point, but

23:14

Bruce seems past college. And also

23:16

the flashbacks seem like they're 40 years ago.

23:20

There's one gangster who now in the present

23:22

day is like, I'm old and played by

23:24

Abe Bogota. And then the flashbacks... But they

23:26

don't make... He's like a young man, so

23:28

I don't... Andrea and Batman look

23:30

younger. No, not at all. Yeah. It

23:33

was like 20 years passage of time or so, something like that.

23:35

20 years? Yeah. So

23:37

Batman has 40 in this? Yeah, I mean, I always

23:39

thought this was like an older Batman. The animated series

23:41

Batman seems a little bit more world weary. Like he's

23:44

doing some shit, you know? But 40? To

23:47

start fighting crime? And like, why can't

23:49

he get a... Oh, sorry. In

23:51

the flashback, he's not 40. Yeah, he's not 40 in the flashback. Oh,

23:53

God. Yeah. Christ. Yeah,

23:56

he has like a midlife crisis. Okay,

24:02

while visiting his parents grave, a young

24:04

Bruce Wayne overheals overhears a young Andrea.

24:06

Is it Andrea or Andrea? No,

24:09

but they said Andrea. There was a very specific

24:11

way. I really was going, why

24:13

is it like that? I never hear that name.

24:15

Andrea. Everyone said it weird. That weird,

24:17

specific. Very specific. She was

24:20

visiting her mother's grave, talking to

24:22

her as though she was still alive. The two

24:24

strike up a conversation and sparks fly, because that's

24:26

where I hit on people. And also he kept

24:28

being like, who are you talking to? She's clearly

24:31

talking to a grave. To a grave, yeah. What

24:33

don't you get? You just did the same

24:36

thing around that grave. She's

24:38

like, she simply can't be doing what I'm doing. And

24:41

then she's like, no, I heard my name. And it's like,

24:43

she's talking about you to the grave. Yeah. But

24:45

that was also weird to be like, Bruce Wayne

24:47

just said hello to me. It's like, you don't

24:49

have to talk to the grave that much. And

24:51

also the grave knows he did, if they hear

24:54

you. That

24:58

night, Bruce dons a ski mask and sworts

25:00

a group of thieves hijacking a truck of

25:02

goods. The next morning, Bruce is

25:05

recuperating and practicing his jujitsu on the lawn.

25:07

That was so lame, I found it. It was so lame. He's

25:09

like, I'm doing jujitsu. It's

25:11

Napoleon Dynamitey. It was. She's

25:13

like, what are you doing? And he's like, jujitsu. And then

25:15

like, not paying attention to her. I know.

25:17

It's just a dork. When she fucking gets him. She

25:19

fucking turns the table. I like that part. She flits

25:21

his ass. That's a clue of like, hmm, maybe there's

25:23

more to her than what's on. Yeah.

25:25

And then in fact, she does that

25:27

same throw as the fucking phantasm. Oh,

25:30

does she? I wasn't paying that part. By the

25:32

way, I was at my dad's grade talking.

25:35

That's how Weiger and I came up. She's like,

25:37

who are you talking to? I'm talking to this

25:39

guy. You're like, I wish I could eat fast food

25:41

and get paid for it. What'd you say? Who

25:43

are you talking to? Me? No, I was

25:45

talking to my dad in his grave. Oh, I thought you were

25:47

talking to me. Well,

25:49

this guy just came over and talked to me. So,

25:57

Andres visits. And to

25:59

his surprise, she shows up. A few moves of her

26:01

own laughing he kisses her. This

26:03

is funny Alfred truly was like drinks.

26:06

Never mind So

26:09

in unlike what Batman's up to with women

26:11

like so And

26:15

you're like a bat or the man to fly

26:18

which one of you is on the

26:20

ultimate wingman No

26:23

pun intended he's a creep he's like I'll

26:25

be leaving now and then he comes back

26:30

He comes back. He's like intentionally coming in

26:32

while he thinks they're gonna be fucking yeah

26:34

He wants to see something. I mean we can

26:36

assume Alfred's not getting any right like no, he's

26:38

a butler He's always check every

26:40

way. I don't call Jack. I'm

26:43

getting some yeah Have

26:54

you talked about on the podcast while we're in

26:56

horny country Have you talked

26:58

about on this on the Batman series yet

27:00

how Batman does not eat pussy like

27:03

that's a thing The DC DC had

27:05

made it a rule that Batman does

27:07

not perform oral sex So this is

27:09

a thing that getting blowjobs like what are

27:12

we even see? Yeah,

27:15

what happened to you see what happened to Michael

27:17

Douglas So

27:23

here's what happened they there's a Harley Quinn

27:25

show that's on that was on HBO man

27:28

That's a cartoon right? That's a yeah that's an

27:30

animated series and Justin Halpern

27:32

is one of the people who made it had

27:34

talked about in an interview and note he got

27:36

from the network because they had a a

27:38

lot a reference in it that was about

27:40

in the in a script that was about

27:43

Batman going down on Catwoman and DC

27:45

like came back hard on them was like

27:47

you have to take that out of Batman

27:50

does not perform oral sex like you cannot

27:52

say that about this character Can

27:54

he do that can they say he had sex with

27:56

her can they say they can be a little bit

27:59

more they can be? a little bit more vague

28:01

I guess but they can't say that Batman like

28:03

canonically Batman does not eat pussy That's like an

28:05

easy thing. That's all lame. So

28:07

Batman just doesn't care about women's

28:09

pleasure? Yeah. I guess not. It's

28:12

also with that mask. It's like the one thing

28:14

he could do. Yeah. Yeah, truly. His mouth is

28:16

so red already. Yeah. Yeah. Ready

28:18

and open for it? I don't know. I feel like

28:20

the rest of it's rubber, right? Yeah. And his nose

28:22

is protected, you know, if he doesn't want to get the nose up in

28:24

there. Yeah. Maybe he's allowed to eat ass. Oh.

28:27

Yeah, he does do that. I don't

28:29

know why. I would even live it

28:32

if a man bat would only eat

28:34

my ass. If you're with a billionaire

28:36

bat guy who literally like fights crime

28:38

and has like six pack hot

28:41

dude and he's like everything is like basically

28:43

perfect about him and he doesn't eat pussy.

28:46

Yeah, it's over. It's over. It's like

28:48

they murder but I can't lick a pussy. Okay. What?

28:50

But he does eat ass. But it's Alfred. Which

28:53

is even weird. He does only eat Alfred's

28:55

ass. Only Alfred's ass and that's why he

28:57

stays around. So wait, your Google alert went

28:59

off when fucking the news broke? This

29:01

is in terms of Batman eats pussy. First off, I

29:03

know this didn't help her and so the part of

29:05

the way I heard about this but it wasn't an

29:08

interview and this was a fairly big thing and actually

29:10

Zack Snyder who directed a couple of Batman movies that

29:12

you're going to cover reacted to

29:14

this by commissioning an artist to draw

29:16

a picture of Batman going down on

29:18

Catwoman. That's awesome. Can we see the hell?

29:20

We can probably find that. Google, Google, we

29:22

gotta see it. Zack Snyder, Catwoman, Conalingus. I'm

29:24

not sure what you searched for. I

29:26

feel like Conalingus is going to be... No,

29:30

Catwoman, not Batwoman. Batman. There's a

29:32

Batwoman? Catwoman. Eating

29:34

pussy? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's try eating pussy.

29:37

We'll get to it, right? Yeah. Here

29:39

we go. Oh, that's a really hot

29:42

image. Honestly, Batman should eat

29:45

pussy. That's

29:47

actually really awesome. That's

29:50

so hot. His caption is canon.

29:52

That's funny. Pretty funny. That's

29:54

funny. Pretty funny. Zack

29:56

Snyder's pretty good. You gotta go find that out soon. Look, I

29:59

don't know. about anything so

30:01

I think that's funny and that's all

30:03

I know that's great wait which one's

30:05

the huge direct? Batman V Superman Dawn of

30:07

Justice and then there's the I don't know if

30:09

you're gonna do Justice League but there's a Snyder

30:12

cut of the Justice League I know those terms

30:14

I know those terms too I've seen them on Twitter

30:16

yeah who's his Batman Ben

30:19

Affleck oh hey after seeing that picture

30:22

I'm gonna be getting some tonight from

30:26

that little hand so

30:28

back to our film to

30:32

jerk off I was adding to your

30:35

joke I

30:37

was so confused that you said my hand was little

30:39

I was like a little hand my

30:44

hand's little I mean I have

30:46

a little hand I don't know I don't think you got

30:48

pretty big I think they're proportionate okay

30:51

so let's just talk about what's important you

30:53

okay? Yeah fine where were we?

30:55

Hold your hands next to your hog what looks so

30:58

little? Yeah pull out your dick let's see what your

31:00

hands look like yeah that'll get us the perspective okay

31:03

so I just want to quickly say no

31:05

within like literally talking to this lady for

31:07

six minutes most

31:10

of which was cemetery talking then doing

31:12

jiu-jitsu he's kissing her on the ground

31:14

it's very strange. That's kind of how it

31:17

goes with him though I feel like he

31:19

like he gets pretty quick with these ladies

31:21

like it's like Kim basing her we had

31:23

even the cat woman cat woman yeah it's

31:25

pretty quick also horny it's a little horny

31:27

I know I'm fine with that part me

31:30

too I think this is paced kind of like

31:33

a TV show so it's like kind of things

31:35

happen a little bit quickly a little bit shorthand

31:37

but she does like mention this is the second

31:39

time she's like right it's very specific but she

31:41

comes in she's like you haven't called like

31:43

she's kind of you know setting up

31:46

that she's interested yeah literally the only reason for

31:48

her to kiss him is because he like

31:51

violently turned the trip on her to like you

31:53

quit and then she I don't know why I

31:56

don't know what he did for her to

31:58

like him yeah right I

32:00

know fucking Bruce Wayne a billionaire You

32:04

have money and you knock me down kiss me.

32:06

He's really hot. Yeah. Yeah, fuck I think you

32:08

have money and you knock me down kiss me

32:16

So gangster buzz Bronsky John P.

32:18

Ryan an old associate of Chucky

32:20

souls Visits Chucky's grave at

32:22

night lots of grave visiting Yeah He is

32:24

confronted by the same mysterious figure as before

32:26

Bronsky falls into an open grave and the

32:29

statue above it is tipped inside crushing him

32:31

to death His bodyguards arrive and

32:33

see a figure in a cape leading them to

32:35

believe Batman killed buzz He's

32:37

always getting framed. Yeah, man investigates and

32:39

then visits his parents grave which

32:42

he likes to do a lot He turns a corner to find

32:44

on dread. I'm not judging it. I'm just saying He

32:47

turns the corner to find Andrea and Andrea notices

32:49

the grave He was standing near and realizes who

32:51

Batman is now She puts it together really fast

32:53

very sounds like every woman figures out that he's

32:55

him Right like they always do is

32:57

that's what's that part of it? That's

32:59

why you can't get too close to anyone Yeah, but then they

33:02

know and then they are not it's like you have to keep

33:04

someone close if they figured it out I'm like then you better

33:06

marry that person now they know Yeah, I want

33:08

to do that but then they're gonna go out in the world

33:10

and tell their friend like he's Believe

33:12

you. Yeah, it's almost like my

33:14

boyfriend Batman. They'd be like no One

33:20

thing I do really like in this movie,

33:22

it's got like one of my favorite Batman

33:25

Like archetypes which is the random

33:27

goon who goes it's the bat.

33:30

It's got a lot of that It's got a

33:32

lot of like random guys be like I ain't

33:34

afraid of the bat. Oh, no the bat I

33:36

didn't notice that they call them the

33:39

battle. I love that kind of almost

33:41

disparaging like it's kind of like Yeah,

33:44

people are way too afraid of the

33:46

bat costume too though because he puts

33:49

it on and at one point Alfred

33:51

is like Oh, he's like scared. I

33:53

was not scared It's not that scary

33:55

if that guy walked in here, I'd be

33:57

scared right now. No, no what he became

34:00

But I'd be scared for like active shooter You'd

34:03

be afraid that he was a murderer I

34:06

thought I was driving in Chicago this summer along

34:09

the lake and just there's this guy dressed fully

34:11

as the Joker just sitting by The like on

34:13

the fucking edge of the highway or right by

34:15

the lake and I was like, that's

34:18

the scariest shit I've ever had that's a

34:20

man just sitting with a Joker makeup on

34:22

just looking at the water. I'm like the

34:24

fuck happened to you What's going on? I'm

34:26

scared. I mean that's scary What if Mike

34:28

like came downstairs in a full Batman costume

34:30

was like, I mean divorce Thank

34:41

you, okay. Well,

34:43

why should I be bad? Yeah I'd

34:47

be great buying

34:49

on Reeves and Andrea Batman has another flashback

34:52

Bruce and Andrea are dating and

34:55

toward the Gotham Gotham World's Fair Andrea takes

34:58

him to meet her father Carl

35:00

Bumont Stacy teach teach.

35:03

Oh, yeah, Stacy teach. Who is that?

35:05

Yeah, he's a character actor Yeah,

35:07

I can't think of a specific

35:10

reference in something. Mm-hmm You've

35:12

got a great look. He's got like a classic

35:15

He's been

35:18

in a bunch of you got a ton of

35:21

stuff a high-powered Gotham businessman Bruce

35:23

also meets young Reeves a

35:25

lawyer in Bumont's company They're

35:27

meeting is crashed by mobsters

35:29

Salvatore's A

35:37

Like that technique so like as if we won't notice Later

35:46

Bruce and Andrea see a street merchant harassed by

35:48

a gang with his training He easily knocks out

35:51

two of the gang but becomes distracted by

35:53

Andrea allowing the gang to escape with the money

35:56

Batman realizes Solon Bronsky were partners

35:58

in several joint dummy corporations run

36:00

by Velestra. In another flashback, Bruce proposes to

36:03

Andrea and they're interrupted by a swarm of

36:05

bats erupting from a hole in the ground

36:07

by the manor. I liked the ring. I

36:09

thought the ring that he proposed with was a

36:11

beautiful diamond. Bruce, it looks like a

36:14

ring pop. Bruce drops Andrea off

36:16

at her home to tell her father the good

36:18

news. Bruce and Velestra's chauffeur catch a

36:20

quick glimpse of each other before Bruce

36:22

leaves. The next morning, Bruce climbs up

36:24

from exploring the cave under the manor. Alfred

36:27

tells Bruce that Andrea returned to his ring saying

36:29

she has to leave. Heartbroken, Bruce

36:31

dons the mask of Batman for the

36:33

first time. Alfred serves as the only

36:35

witness. Batman's war on crime

36:37

begins. So I was always

36:39

told, always told, the last couple episodes

36:41

were like he became Batman because

36:44

his parents died. This is saying he becomes

36:46

Batman because a woman left him. Yeah. Which

36:49

is true. Yeah, it's kind of a long, yeah,

36:51

I mean, I think he was like, okay, I'm

36:53

going to be a vigilante. Like he's kind of

36:55

starting to do that, right? Like that element is

36:58

seated, then he's actually assumes the identity of the

37:00

bat. Like I'm going to be a different guy

37:02

after he fucking has this different trauma. I

37:04

got a message for the ring pop company.

37:07

I know this is make

37:09

bigger rings so they can fit bigger people's

37:11

fingers. I want to be able to bring

37:13

pop on my finger. Yeah, I would love

37:15

to see adult hands with a little ring

37:17

pop. I'd love to see that. They're like,

37:19

there's a gap, but you can't bend it

37:22

because it's the classical. It'll

37:24

just break your ring pop thing for the

37:26

bigger finger ring pop. You got to be

37:28

plus size ring. We need

37:30

to be really big again. Like that. Like

37:32

a thing that people wear. Don't

37:37

eat them. Just wear them. They get

37:39

on the right carpet. Okay. Where are

37:41

we? Sorry to sidetrack about the ring.

37:43

Oh no, he said that. You're supposed

37:45

to sidetrack. That's otherwise. Oh boy. A

37:48

hundred paragraphs levy. So Velestra

37:55

goes alone to meet the Joker, Mark Hamill,

37:57

which I'm like the Joker comes so late.

38:00

But I feel like that's also kind of something with

38:02

these movies where like there's like a whole new thing

38:04

happening like kind of far Into it. I don't like

38:06

it and I like that whole new thing better than

38:08

the thing that happened before but Mark Hamill Famously

38:11

from Star Wars so our

38:13

old he's Luke. Oh, yes

38:15

Yeah, Skywalker and our our

38:18

favorite movie Love

38:20

him so much Interesting

38:23

that he was the Joker and he's

38:25

fucking great Yeah I

38:27

think the best Batman. I think I think Mark

38:30

Hamill is the best Joker. He's so fucking good

38:32

And if he's a Joker on the TV show,

38:34

yes. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Oh Cool.

38:37

So it's all the same cast. It's the same

38:39

cast Yeah, that's fun and offers to hire

38:41

him to kill Batman later that night

38:43

the shadowy shadowy Villa vigilante enters

38:46

the Velestra's mansion to execute him only

38:48

to find Velestra has been poisoned by

38:50

Joker venom on Velestra's lap is a

38:52

surveillance camera and a radio from which

38:54

comes Joker's voice the vigilante Leaps

38:56

from the building's window just as the package

38:58

and Velestra's lap explodes Batman is

39:01

confronted by a police task force and pursuit

39:03

in pursued into a construction site

39:06

One officer shoots a propane tank in

39:08

a nice explosion Batman escapes Andrea picks

39:10

him up in her car later Andrea

39:12

tells what really happened that night. They

39:14

saw each other. I think that bad. I

39:16

think that action sequence is really good It

39:19

was just like it's some really some really cool animation.

39:21

I thought it was fun. Which one he's kind of

39:23

escaping Huh, or with the

39:25

wrong part read When

39:29

the when oh, there's that cheese sequence right are we

39:31

in a different part in the movie? Oh,

39:33

yeah This

39:38

is this is the kind of crazy Twist

39:41

it starts to start to become a twist at this

39:43

point So Andrea returned home and found her

39:45

father in the clutches of three mobsters

39:47

soul, Bronsky and Velestra They've discovered

39:49

that he's embezzled their money and want him

39:52

dead Carl begs for one more

39:54

chance and Velestra agrees once they're gone

39:56

Carl tells Andrea they must leave town immediately So he's like

39:58

I'll get it for you tomorrow, but it's 24

40:00

hours and he's like we gotta leave the country.

40:02

I can't get the money. We're gonna die They're

40:04

gonna kill you to my daughter. I was like

40:06

this and he clutched her head like they were

40:08

lovers I didn't that

40:10

part stressed me out. It's very stressful

40:13

Bruce realizes Carl has to find another way

40:15

to rid himself and Andrea

40:18

the mobsters and has

40:20

been killing them The next

40:22

morning Bruce and Andrea promised to make their relationship

40:24

work Bruce looks over the

40:26

photo of Carl Bumont and the three

40:28

gangsters and realizes the illustrious chauffeur is

40:30

the Joker. Yeah The

40:35

chauffeur character was drawn more crudely than

40:37

the other characters I noticed that character

40:40

Oh interesting, but I

40:42

didn't get why and then I was like, okay She's the Joker

40:44

or whatever But I was like I still felt like he was

40:46

drawn very like one line here one line here

40:48

with the other ones were more Did anyone notice that

40:51

I didn't know apparently not do we skipped the part

40:53

where that man was in the car and he was like

40:55

breathing In his oxygen tank and that man got out and he's

40:57

like, it's not healthy in here Yeah,

41:00

yeah Yeah,

41:02

I don't know that really made me laugh.

41:04

Yeah So

41:06

in his office Reeve fumes

41:08

about the police's failure to catch Batman

41:10

and is confronted by the Joker Joker

41:13

stabs Reeves with a slow acting version

41:15

of his Joker Toxin Reeves

41:17

is rushed to the hospital and confesses Boma

41:19

enlisted Reeves's help in getting himself and Andrea

41:22

out of town But my refused

41:24

to give any money for Reeves election So

41:26

Reeves still Boma's whereabouts told told them or

41:28

sold them to the mob Batman

41:30

goes to Andrea's empty hotel room Batman

41:32

sees a toy plane flying towards the

41:34

room carrying a bomb Dismantles it and

41:36

escapes and they remembered discovering

41:38

the Joker killed her father that fateful day

41:42

Who is so Reeves go when he did

41:44

the hospital he can't stop laughing, right? Yeah. Yeah That

41:47

was pretty funny because then they give him an injection

41:50

then Batman appears and he's laughing again I was

41:52

like, yeah, it's pretty funny. You calm down and you're

41:54

like a man dresses a bat. That's

41:56

funny Must listen

41:58

to a Doughboy's episode Get

42:01

those laughs. How am I gonna

42:03

laugh? Oh, God, it's

42:05

a dough boy. Inside his hideout,

42:07

the Joker is confronted by the killer

42:10

while eating a bolo sausage sliced by

42:12

his cooking animatronic hazel.

42:14

So it's like Rosie from the

42:16

Jetsons. Yeah. And he's like, go

42:19

fucking random. You knew that she was gonna be

42:21

no good when you saw her with a big

42:23

knife. Yeah. You knew something was gonna happen.

42:25

But I was hoping she would be on

42:28

the side of Andrea. I thought

42:30

maybe she was gonna come to her to death. That

42:32

would be wild. So

42:34

wild. I really was like, I hope the

42:36

robot helped her. And then she tried to get her and I

42:38

was like, huh? This

42:41

is not what I expected. He

42:43

deduces the vigilante is Andrea and the

42:45

two fights. The Joker lures her into

42:47

the path of a gigantic aircraft engine.

42:49

Batman arrives, crashes his bat

42:52

cycle into the engine fronters and

42:54

comes from Andrea. Andrea

42:56

says she has nothing left except her

42:58

revenge. Joker distracts Batman

43:00

long enough to don a jet

43:02

pack and escape. Andrea reappears and

43:04

Batman please for her to run

43:06

as the fairground is wired to

43:09

explode. She refuses. The ground beneath

43:11

Batman collapses into a sewer line carrying

43:13

him away. Later at the manor,

43:15

the bat signal lights up in the sky and

43:17

Batman swings off into the night. And

43:20

that's it. Yeah. It's so

43:22

fun hearing you guys read this because I

43:24

can tell how little you like. It's

43:27

so clear that you get it like

43:29

this. I

43:32

know. I feel like at the beginning

43:34

I was like, oh, it's like a romance. There

43:36

was this love story happening, but

43:39

it's much more about the sort of dark images

43:41

of guys getting away

43:43

from each other and fighting and stuff. And

43:45

I mean, I just don't care for that

43:47

as much. But

43:50

I was kind of like, okay, is this

43:52

canon? Like is this so when

43:54

Batman meets Kim Basinger or whatever

43:56

is like, is that he's like, he's already been

43:58

like, I forget about Andrea right now. I'm

44:00

with Valerie Dale or whatever. They're all

44:02

kind of different cannons. I feel like

44:04

I think there's a Burton Schumacher

44:07

movies are kind of their own thing even though

44:09

there's a shifting Batman. I do think that's kind

44:11

of one continuity But this

44:13

is the bat the animated series is kind of its

44:15

own thing and I could draw some other sources But

44:17

that's the thing. It's like I think there's just like

44:20

there's so many different versions of Batman and they've got

44:22

some overlap But I think you kind of the way

44:24

to think of them all is self-contained. All

44:26

right, okay Even though

44:29

this has the bat like the Burton theme that Denny

44:31

Elfman theme is part of the you know The animated

44:33

series and it's in this movie a

44:35

little bit. It's like it's still not the same

44:37

Batman. It's like a different Yeah,

44:39

so every iteration of Batman is like

44:42

a restart Yeah I think for the most

44:44

part because it's like you know You'll get

44:46

to the Nolan movies and those are those

44:48

have nothing that carries over from the Burton

44:50

movies They're kind of just their own thing

44:53

I guess that's a nice freedom for the people making

44:55

them that you're trying to make everything make sense This

44:57

is this is my issue with the movies. I

44:59

also didn't see it in 1993 or whatever but

45:02

the origin story I was like I've seen this

45:04

origin story so many times and this is kind

45:06

of a Boring

45:08

version of it. I guess. Yeah, I

45:11

think what's cool about it is that it's okay

45:13

This is a because the whole thing about man

45:15

is like yeah, there's some His

45:18

issues with like that like what what a

45:20

solitary figure he is Right and how he

45:22

can't really ever love or be loved and

45:24

this very much like imagines a different reality

45:26

or like centers on like the other reality

45:29

that could have been where he'd like found

45:31

a Partner and and had a

45:33

normal life and just like the flashbacks to

45:35

that and then with each flashback We're

45:38

seeing that there's more and more distance between like you

45:40

know What he what he hopes for and what can

45:42

actually take place and then we see him like you

45:44

know Like if he's in this solitary life by the

45:46

end of it. I don't know I think I

45:48

structurally I like the romantic fat flashbacks, but again

45:51

I do have nostalgia for this movie from

45:53

seeing as a kid and and also like I

45:57

I think it's just like a

45:59

big part of the appeal for this movie for me is like

46:01

actually looks fantastic. I just love the aesthetic of it. It

46:03

did look good. It looks cool. And

46:06

he was particularly sad in this movie. Very,

46:08

very sad. I feel like we haven't seen

46:10

much sadness out of Batman. Yeah.

46:13

So that was kind of interesting. I was like, oh, he's lonely.

46:16

Lonely. Like just hanging out at

46:18

Grey? I feel lonely really. No. Michael

46:20

Keaton was just like hot. He's like, I'm just doing my

46:22

thing and then everyone's small. Got that

46:24

curly jerry curl. I'm making out with gals.

46:27

I liked it. I love that he's a big

46:29

dude in this. Yeah, he's very

46:31

big. It makes it like the bat, like

46:33

Batman should be a big imposing like fucking

46:35

unit of a dude. Well, I will say

46:38

Michael Keaton is 5'8", which I looked up. Oh.

46:40

And that always shocks me because I'm 5'10", and whenever

46:43

I learn that someone that I've just like watched my

46:45

whole life is shorter than me, it really throws me

46:47

for a loop. Like I'm just like, doesn't make sense.

46:50

Well, how tall is Michelle Pfeiffer then? She's 5'7".

46:52

I looked it all up. Oh, she's much shorter.

46:55

I know. I wonder if they were doing Apple box tricks.

46:57

Probably. Wait,

46:59

are there any big Batman? Well, that

47:01

Affleck is tall, right? Affleck's just, he's cool. He's

47:04

more bulky. I don't

47:06

know how tall he is. He's like a big dude. How big is

47:08

he? He's a big dude. Yeah. But

47:11

how big? Let's find out. 6'2". Okay,

47:14

6'2". Me and Affleck. Wow. You

47:17

guys are so excited. Let me just stand back and

47:19

our heads be the same. No,

47:22

I know what he's going to say. No, like

47:24

you see his hog and gong girl. Yeah.

47:27

There's a big hog. I forgot about that. He's got

47:29

a huge hog. Wait, you

47:31

see his dick and gong girl? You see it in

47:33

profile, but you get a pretty good look at it.

47:35

I saw it in theaters. We argued about this. It's

47:38

gigantic. We're used

47:40

to this gigantic. I think it looks good. But I don't

47:42

think, I think gigantic is a high bar. I have a

47:44

video of it. I do have a video of it. Easily

47:48

accessible? I love that. He has one of his

47:50

favorites. I love that. And then

47:52

group texted it to prove a point. I'll

47:54

find it. I don't have time to go find

47:56

the timestamp. I sure don't. read

48:00

about the oh never mind it

48:02

could take a while found it

48:05

here it is I'm playing the clip I'm

48:07

wearing shower sounds which is

48:10

showing it to Nicole that's

48:12

a big hog wait I barely saw it they show

48:14

there's a comic where you see Batman's

48:18

dick and it's looking pretty that's so what

48:20

is wrong with it where you see Batman's

48:22

yeah and they released it and then some

48:24

people complained so they re-released it with that

48:26

like Batman's yeah I think there's a might

48:28

be if you just search for Batman's dick

48:30

it might be tough because you might get

48:32

a lot of fan art oh we don't

48:35

want this it we want official DC Batman's dick in

48:38

cartoon yeah in a deepie comic

48:40

cartoon and it's like that's not practice

48:42

we think animated animated yeah yeah a

48:44

lot of hits for Nick Wager calm Batman

48:46

damn number one back why is it purple

48:48

like it's already been searched oh it's bookmark

48:55

so yeah okay some of these are

48:58

nice but and my your where the

49:00

art the

49:04

artist had fun yeah is it the

49:06

one with the yeah yeah so

49:08

the original like and then they censored it hmm

49:13

you see where they right here it's

49:15

not well you can barely really see

49:17

it I will say that's that's a

49:19

big one it's pretty good enough that

49:21

seems nice yeah Jesus Christ yeah you

49:23

can see like his glands it's pretty

49:25

big glands all right

49:27

I get these vast deference

49:31

the hell's going on with Batman yeah

49:33

I mean horny is hell it's because he's kind of

49:35

like he ultimately ends up being valsal but

49:37

he is it for he does like a

49:39

horny pure voluntary so yeah well I get

49:42

in so is an involuntary so is that

49:44

a word you just coined no people have said

49:46

valsal oh wait he's a in-sale no he's a

49:48

ball because you could

49:50

have any woman he wants exactly oh

49:52

but he chooses not to as a

49:54

fellow valsal we're kind of more involved

49:56

well that's kind of the Batman Joker

49:58

like some people theorize That's basically what

50:00

is it's false cell versus in cell like Batman

50:03

can fuck but chooses not to Joker can't

50:05

want to fuck but can't oh He's

50:08

got how we quit. He ultimately has Harley Quinn. Oh,

50:10

that's nothing Batman the enemy series gave us Harley Quinn

50:13

That's like the that came from that show who has

50:15

hurt. What do you mean? The Joker

50:17

like they're a couple there a couple.

50:19

Yeah, right really manic.

50:21

Yeah, cuz she falls into a bad as

50:23

shit, too, right? There's different

50:25

origins, but yeah Were you

50:28

afraid we couldn't talk about how a flex

50:30

hog good so there's like 45 dough boys

50:32

episode It

50:34

was like, you know rude or something Look

50:44

I love I love Ben Affleck. I'm a big

50:46

fan of him his as an actor. I think

50:48

he's a good director I think that he does

50:51

interesting stuff anything is Batman's really good which you'll

50:53

get to I'm excited to see it. I'm also

50:55

excited to see it. I like the Snyder movies

50:57

a lot of people don't okay I can't wait

50:59

because I've heard so many bits about that. Yeah

51:02

It's a bit of a B side. I wonder what you guys

51:04

will think of it Yeah, and why is there a

51:06

Snyder cut and not a Snyder cut? Well,

51:09

so there was a whole thing

51:11

where they were where Zack Snyder

51:13

was replaced on Justice League And

51:16

there was some dispute as to how like how

51:18

much that was him He said he withdrew for

51:20

personal reasons, but there was also some speculation that

51:22

he was like it was not his choice to

51:24

leave Otter was very weird Some

51:28

sad timing Joss

51:30

Whedon who directed the Mitch has dropped

51:32

his phone Joss Whedon who directed the

51:34

Avengers? Movie got brought on to

51:36

bring in Justice League and kind of brought the

51:38

Avengers sort of jokey tone And

51:41

a lot of people didn't like that you

51:43

know what DC is and so then the

51:45

Snyder's act There was always speculation the Zack

51:47

Snyder cut Existed and that was

51:49

later confirmed and they released like a four-hour version

51:52

of the movie for our in long It's a

51:54

boy. I became such a joke. I feel like

51:56

two people like are you know using it in

51:58

bits? Yeah Snyder Cut or

52:00

whatever. But it's cool. Was it even in the

52:02

movie? Was there a joke about it in the Barbie movie?

52:04

There is a joke about it in the Barbie movie. I felt like

52:07

that was another in joke that I was like, my mom

52:09

won't understand what that means. And by the way. I like to

52:11

watch movies wondering what your mom will and won't understand. I know,

52:13

I know. Well, if I was with her, I'd be going, this

52:15

is better, this is better, this is better. You know. I

52:18

love that. I watch movies in a similar

52:20

way, or with my mommy, so bad. But

52:24

I like

52:27

the, I think the Snyder Cut is better. Yeah,

52:29

you like that four hour jamboree? I

52:31

like it more, it's better. It's a better movie. Four hours

52:33

though? I think I've written a painting. It's long, I mean,

52:36

you're gonna hate having to watch a four hour movie. We

52:38

have to do that? Oh, you hated watching a 75

52:40

minute movie. Yeah, it's true. That's a big three hour. I don't

52:42

think that duration is the issue. 75 minutes was

52:44

too much. It really was. We

52:46

only watched TikTok. Can

52:49

I just say also that again with

52:51

a timeline, they go to the, they

52:54

were at the World's Fair, which by the way, they take a

52:56

card around and they go to the House of the

52:58

Future, which is a lady

53:00

chopping carrots. I guess it's a robot chopping carrots. The

53:02

thing is that the robot is chopping carrots because besides

53:04

that, it's just a guy watching TV. There's nothing really.

53:06

Here's one thing I didn't like, the Joker had to push the

53:08

meat for her to keep cutting it. I was like, then this

53:10

isn't helpful. You could just do

53:13

it. Yeah, you're moving with one element of

53:15

this. So maybe it's

53:17

like a companionship thing. He was in love with her.

53:19

I also was like, what if he really had sex

53:22

with her? Like I just felt like, yeah, it seemed like

53:24

it could go that way. No wonder if

53:26

that's what the future is. You could fuck a robot. People

53:29

do that now. That's the

53:31

present. You could fuck a robot. You could fuck a robot if you want. A

53:33

hundred percent. Well, I know they have sex dolls,

53:36

but like an animated doll. I feel like there's

53:38

gotta be one that like goes like, I love

53:40

this. There

53:43

is one that. I love that. You're

53:46

hot. I like your hog. I

53:49

only got two Roombas in my house, so

53:51

I'm not, I ain't fucking them. I hope

53:53

not. You only have two, so

53:55

you're not fucking them. You don't want to break one. You

53:58

could stand to break one. You I don't want

54:00

to count your money, but I think you could afford

54:02

to replace a room, but if you fucked it and

54:05

it broke I thought I was too complicated It's

54:09

like I don't have a bumping in I just it's

54:11

been sitting there very loud There's a

54:13

lot about it's not as convenient as I thought it

54:15

was gonna be yes It's a little bit

54:17

of handy-ass you know maybe sit it's a move the chairs

54:21

Every done vacuuming by now yeah, I got gift

54:23

I had a rumor that was gifted room I

54:26

didn't fuck a room until it broke okay trying

54:28

to be okay Do

54:31

your cats ride the Roomba? God

54:33

damn it. I wish they did so bad that would

54:35

be awesome Yeah, you could

54:37

really go viral with that. Yeah Mr..

54:41

Mitchell next shall I vacuum the bird's

54:43

nest? Okay,

54:50

this movie meaning to go

54:52

viral My list of things to do

54:54

eat cheese and go viral Awards

55:07

and reception now this Batman earned about

55:10

five point six million dollars in North

55:12

American box office sales the film went on

55:14

to gross 5.8 million in

55:16

a domestic total box office intake the

55:19

filmmakers blamed Warner Brothers for the

55:21

unsuccessful marketing campaign Which is commonly

55:23

attributed to the rushed production schedule

55:25

due to the studio's last-minute decision

55:27

to release the film theatrically It

55:29

currently holds an 81% rating on rotten tomatoes and

55:32

an 88% audience score I'm

55:35

happy for everyone that this is their favorite.

55:38

I'm like great. Yeah, no offense We were

55:40

a little bored, and that's just I was

55:42

more than bored Yeah, I had to restart

55:44

this movie like eight times.

55:47

I fell asleep so many times It was yeah,

55:49

I really was like I put too thick to

55:52

my eyelids and I was like read all captain's

55:54

never look away And I should have done that

55:56

put the captions on till it helped because

56:00

I'm just like, I'm unable to think

56:02

about tooth, you know what I mean? Like if I

56:04

start zoning out that I'm like, oh, what? I gotta rewind.

56:06

I'm like, no, I was rewinding out being like,

56:09

I hate Batman. I've never wanted

56:11

to watch Batman in my whole life. And

56:13

now I have to. But you're watching, I feel

56:16

like our opinions are already differing so much. This

56:18

is one that we came together on, but I feel like

56:20

I've been enjoying. Yeah, you've been like, yeah, yeah. I've been

56:22

like, it's kind of fun. I like Tim Burton, you know?

56:24

So I'm like, that's been great. I don't know what's gonna happen

56:26

after this. Me either. I'm

56:28

really curious. I'm gonna be

56:31

fascinated to learn what you think of the Joel

56:33

Schumacher ones. I think you guys maybe will have

56:35

fun. You might like, these are the next ones

56:37

we're watching. Well, did you like Batman 66, the

56:39

Adam West one? No. I thought it

56:41

was like, kitschy fun, like kind of silly. Okay. It

56:43

wasn't the worst thing that ever happened to me. Like I

56:46

had a good time. I thought it was the worst

56:48

thing that happened to me until this movie. Yeah,

56:50

yeah, yeah. This movie is, it's a funny decision

56:52

to be like, let's release like

56:54

the super horny animated

56:57

children's movie on Christmas day.

56:59

Yeah. It's a weird choice,

57:01

but who's going? Like, I don't know, it's

57:03

tough. A lot of dads with their kids

57:05

for this holiday. Yeah, yeah. Like

57:08

it feels like the kind of thing you would put on this

57:10

summer and like you would go with your friends and just, I

57:12

mean, the winter going to the movies a lot. It did just

57:14

seem like it should have been released on VHS. Yeah,

57:16

that would have been the movie. Like direct the video? Yeah, I think so. It

57:19

feels like that. Yeah, it didn't feel like a theater

57:21

movie. And that's where I think it ultimately had

57:23

success. Yeah. Because also

57:25

it was like, they'd made it as, because they

57:27

were making a direct to video, they'd like, it

57:29

was all framed for four by three.

57:32

And so then they had, they had to

57:34

like on the fly, figure out how to

57:36

reframe it for a theatrical aspect. Oh, that's

57:38

why they're saying it was. There

57:41

are frames in it that are like blurred and frames

57:43

that freeze. There's weird stuff in it. Yeah, there were

57:45

a couple moments where it like, I was like, oh,

57:47

they decided to stop animating that. They

57:50

said no more animation there. They, you get

57:52

it. He's just staring. You

57:55

get what's going on. They're talking to a

57:57

grave again. Also gave us clay face. which

58:00

is a great villain. And

58:02

then he changed his game. And an actor- Yeah,

58:04

that wasn't in this. No. His face

58:06

was an actor obsessed with looking young.

58:09

And he used cream, and then he turned into

58:11

like a big mud monster. Pretty funny. Have you

58:13

heard about the billionaire who uses his son's blood

58:15

to stay young? Oh my God. He's

58:18

like 45 years old and looks 45 years

58:20

old, and takes

58:22

his son's blood, and then his younger son gives

58:24

blood to his father. That's

58:27

so messed up. And that's weird. And what they

58:29

like, they have like blood transfusions? I

58:31

think so. That's insane. Isn't that wild?

58:34

That's horrible for those kids. Look

58:36

at, he truly just looks 45, maybe

58:38

even 50. Brian

58:41

Johnson. Yeah, look at this sick man.

58:44

Yeah, he looks like at

58:47

his exact age. And then

58:49

that's all of them. They're all like, what is this?

58:51

It's like a romance. It looks like that like

58:53

sexy cover where like all those women are hugging each

58:55

other. Like they're like, we have all

58:57

each other's blood in us. This

58:59

is really bizarre. Isn't that wild? It's

59:02

like three generations all in like a tender

59:04

embrace. My dad, my brother, and

59:06

my nephew would never pose like that.

59:08

I can't imagine. I don't think anybody

59:10

in my family would. That would be

59:13

the weirdest fucking day. If they all

59:15

put on, I would say

59:17

wife beaters. I don't think we call it that anymore.

59:19

Spouse beef, beaters. Spouse beef, you know, keep it inclusive.

59:22

And then romantically hugged. I think that would be the

59:25

end of times. That's

59:27

the thing about Bruce Wayne is like the

59:30

actual billionaires are like this. They're fucking weirdo.

59:33

You don't want to marry them. No, no.

59:35

The full length picture is even creepier. They're

59:38

standing in a field. This is so bizarre. This

59:40

is honestly the weirdest. And they kind of do look like

59:42

shit. They look bad. They all

59:44

look bad for their age. Like the main dad,

59:46

regular dad is like buff, but you're like, yeah,

59:49

you could be like just work out. Like it's

59:51

like, you don't need your blood for that. Who's

59:53

the lady in the top right? Oh

59:55

yeah. I think that's like their wife

59:57

who wants to kill them all. I

59:59

don't. Oh, that's him. That's

1:00:01

the billionaire. That's

1:00:03

the wife that wants to kill them It

1:00:07

looks like something mugshot. Okay, let's

1:00:09

move along Okay,

1:00:13

this segment is called no Wayne where

1:00:15

we read trivia from the film So

1:00:18

it's the first comic book film Nominated

1:00:20

for an Annie award awards for excellence

1:00:23

in film animation for best animated feature

1:00:25

losing to the lion king. Oh tough

1:00:27

year Yeah, I mean real tough. I

1:00:29

was one of the best Disney Oh, it

1:00:31

wasn't until Disney's big hero 6 2014

1:00:33

that another comic book film was nominated.

1:00:35

I love big hero sex It's such a

1:00:37

good movie and Sony's spider-man

1:00:40

into the spider-verse from 2018. I

1:00:42

didn't love that. Did you watch that?

1:00:44

I haven't seen that I've been told that is good

1:00:46

and that homecoming one is the second one that came

1:00:48

out is also Really really good. Mike

1:00:50

has been telling me those are really good. And

1:00:53

I think you'll like them. They're like actually funny

1:00:55

I was like in theaters laughing and nobody

1:00:57

else was laughing and I was like, is this really exciting view? Mark

1:01:03

Hamill went on went to a screening at a

1:01:05

local theater during the film's theatrical release with only

1:01:07

a few people in attendance He

1:01:09

asked them to sit with him before the film started.

1:01:11

They must have been geeking out That would be really

1:01:13

exciting that you're where there's someone like me and they're

1:01:15

like, who are you? Why

1:01:18

do you want to sit with me? But

1:01:21

like if you are a superfan and you're going

1:01:23

to see that and that's him I would just be

1:01:25

nervous about reacting to the film next to a person

1:01:27

who's starring it that would make me feel uncomfortable Right

1:01:30

the idea of you screaming who

1:01:33

are you to Luke Skywalker? He

1:01:38

literally would be like this is the first Might

1:01:42

be refreshing from start to finish

1:01:44

production took eight months. That's fast for animated. Yeah,

1:01:46

I think so And

1:01:48

despite the title the phantasm is

1:01:50

never referred to by name. I

1:01:53

don't like that Well,

1:01:55

maybe what are they calling her in it?

1:01:58

I know I mean they're like Like the most

1:02:00

of them have taken it for Batman.

1:02:03

They just keep saying it's Batman. Mmm,

1:02:05

alright. Well, it's the Bat! Man, I

1:02:07

think the... I

1:02:10

think the Phantasm... I think

1:02:12

it's a really cool design. I think the Phantasm

1:02:14

looks so awesome. I love the hook and... And

1:02:16

then I think it's a cool reveal. I don't

1:02:18

know. I thought it was very cool when it was

1:02:20

her because I was like, whoa! I

1:02:23

really felt like I just really didn't get it.

1:02:25

Whoa! But I also think it's easier

1:02:27

to have a twist than a cartoon than a day

1:02:29

of the TV. You know, with physical actors. I also

1:02:31

was pretty surprised. I was like, wait, what? Yeah. I'm

1:02:34

like, well, yeah, she could look huge because she's drawn.

1:02:37

Um, it's not like a costume. Um,

1:02:41

anyone could have been in there, but there's no one

1:02:43

in there. It's a drawing. Um,

1:02:46

alright, let's take a quick break. When we get

1:02:48

back, we'll be back with more Batman Mask of

1:02:50

the Phantasm. We're back! This segment is called The

1:02:52

Bat. We're

1:02:55

back! This segment, holy

1:02:58

Batman! Batman

1:03:01

will rate Kevin Conroy on the

1:03:03

definitive newcomers Batman scale. We'll use

1:03:05

our phones with his little QR

1:03:07

code and we're going to rank

1:03:09

them across five unique characteristics. Preparedness.

1:03:11

Wow. How prepared is this Batman? Does

1:03:13

he get to use his little gadgets and tools? Detective

1:03:16

ability. Does this Batman get to be a

1:03:19

little detective? Is he good at mystery solving?

1:03:21

Voice gravelliness. How gravelly is

1:03:24

Batman's voice? Sadness. How lonely

1:03:26

slash brooding slash emo is

1:03:28

his Batman. And finally, hotness.

1:03:30

How hot and horny is his Batman?

1:03:34

I am just impressed by the production volume.

1:03:36

Isn't this cool? Isn't it great? You

1:03:38

have an actual physical QR code. We're scanning in the

1:03:40

studio and then we're using our phones to rate this.

1:03:43

This is wild. This is cool. Preparedness.

1:03:46

I should talk about it a little bit. It's

1:03:54

just reading

1:03:59

out. Oh shit, I was

1:04:01

thinking much longer. Are

1:04:04

you done? I've been after like a clip. Okay, he's

1:04:06

just like, it is a big one. Okay

1:04:12

so... Big girl out of your mind. Preparedness,

1:04:16

we all on average ranked

1:04:18

him 75.5% prepared. I felt like

1:04:20

he was prepared but then it's like when she flipped

1:04:22

him over in the jujitsu I was like, you weren't ready for

1:04:25

that one. Look

1:04:27

at these, a Weiger 100. Yeah, I went straight 100. Oh,

1:04:31

you can see who did it? Oh fun.

1:04:33

I noticed that. I noticed last time didn't

1:04:35

have as wide a range and I can

1:04:37

see that these little things got it. Okay,

1:04:41

so detective ability 72%. What

1:04:44

does everyone think about that? I

1:04:46

mean... You thought he was 100% detective ability. I

1:04:49

think that he did some shit out. I

1:04:56

matched up with someone here because I went

1:04:58

right around what the number ended up being.

1:05:02

But he should have probably known that

1:05:04

his lover was the phantasm. He

1:05:06

didn't do a kind of detecting. I'm

1:05:08

that first one because I was like, I don't

1:05:10

think he really was figuring shit out. Yeah, but I

1:05:13

feel like they talked about him being a good

1:05:15

detective, which made me think he

1:05:17

was. How do you give him

1:05:19

100 on voice graveliness? He's not. He doesn't.

1:05:22

He just never changes his voice. He's appropriately gravelly.

1:05:24

Yeah, we averaged 52. He just sounds like this

1:05:26

the entire movie. Yeah,

1:05:29

I didn't find him gravelly at all. I'm

1:05:32

that first one again. Yeah, you guys ranked him pretty low.

1:05:34

I put him at 70 ish because I was like,

1:05:36

sort of gravelly. Sadness.

1:05:40

We all agree he's basically 100% sad. Very

1:05:42

sad. This is the saddest sad we've

1:05:44

ever seen. So sad, just hanging out at graves. He's

1:05:47

always by a grave and at the end he's like, I'm

1:05:49

alone. It was actually bad at the end.

1:05:53

Hotness and horniness, 79.8%. Who

1:05:56

ranked him low? Me. Okay, so

1:05:58

you're not attracted. I thought he was a bulky, hot... I

1:06:00

like that he was big, but I just he was too

1:06:02

sad. I'm like I don't want to yeah, sad man

1:06:04

Yeah, yeah, that does take away a little

1:06:07

bit. Yeah, all right. Well that was fun

1:06:09

It's like the idea of a date of going to visit

1:06:11

his dead parents. I know Not

1:06:18

into it Natalie

1:06:21

my wife is by the way she mentioned

1:06:23

is a huge fan of newcomers. She listened

1:06:25

to every episode of your Five years she

1:06:28

but she what like all what horn is

1:06:30

she was her one comment on this movie

1:06:32

was like I like how horny everyone is

1:06:34

a very horny movie the film itself was

1:06:36

horny Yes, and we horny for him right

1:06:38

maybe that's the distinction. We have to make one

1:06:40

more there. Yeah about that So we rank

1:06:42

it clearly There was

1:06:45

there was a lady in the beginning

1:06:47

who throws a wine in his face, but

1:06:49

she's not the fantastic That's what I said

1:06:51

earlier that Confused

1:06:53

wait, I don't think it's her I think

1:06:55

that's a random woman I think Hair

1:06:59

yeah, the character is too similar.

1:07:01

Yes. I agree. That's confusing. I

1:07:05

don't think that's her it is a little confusing All

1:07:09

right, that is a warning all these women are

1:07:11

on his arms, and he's not saying a single

1:07:13

word Yeah, and they're all like very into him

1:07:15

just standing there. You don't gotta say a word

1:07:18

when your wallet's up He's playing the role of

1:07:20

Bruce Wayne when the real him is Batman So

1:07:28

like he's you know Doesn't

1:07:30

really know how to stand around here, but what

1:07:32

would he say exactly I need a fat wallet

1:07:34

get on it All

1:07:42

right time for the segment five kapow These

1:07:45

are our reviews of our podcast

1:07:47

now of course we have to brag that

1:07:49

people gave us five stars yes We love it

1:07:51

this one comes from men cow it's five stars

1:07:54

duh the clearest five-star podcast That's all they wrote

1:07:56

and that's all you have to write people at

1:07:58

the end. That's all very simple Okay,

1:08:00

and in addition to Apple reviews

1:08:02

will also be reading reviews from

1:08:05

letterbox And then we're gonna give

1:08:07

the film a one sentence review and a star

1:08:09

rating and if you don't know letterbox is a

1:08:11

social platform Where people can write reviews of films

1:08:13

and you can follow newcomers on letterbox at newcomers

1:08:15

are either of you on? Letterbox

1:08:18

I'm not but Mitch it I'm on there. Yeah,

1:08:20

you do you go on and review everything you watch No,

1:08:23

I like I was

1:08:25

doing that when I was watching 100 movies a year Which

1:08:27

I do and why I got a year

1:08:31

Like you have like you're like I want to

1:08:33

watch 100 movies. Yeah hundred new movies. Wow. That's

1:08:35

a fun goal Yeah, and he did it. He

1:08:37

hit it yesterday. I'm sure new movies Well,

1:08:40

I cannot I'm a kind of all and you have what

1:08:43

was your favorite new movie of

1:08:45

this year? Oh Boy, I

1:08:47

have to go back What did

1:08:49

I watch for the first time this year that I loved? I'll

1:08:52

tell you mine collateral. Oh,

1:08:54

yeah, that's great. Great loved it. Talk to the

1:08:56

great in it Theaters, I

1:08:58

would say the first slam dunk the anime.

1:09:00

I saw this year is fucking awesome I

1:09:02

that's one of my favorite among movies that

1:09:04

I hadn't seen from the past Park

1:09:08

Chan Wilkes a joint security area. I'd never

1:09:10

seen I'm always fucking awesome. I've never heard

1:09:12

that is really good cool We're

1:09:14

on 60. I think that's great time.

1:09:16

Did you write a letterbox review about

1:09:19

Barbie? I did not know

1:09:22

Wow I

1:09:26

What am I gonna write fantastic over and

1:09:28

over again? I Remember

1:09:30

I did actually do have a letterbox account, but I made

1:09:32

it just so someone wouldn't take my name Oh,

1:09:35

and I appropriate for this podcast

1:09:37

I reviewed one movie and that was Joker

1:09:39

which I gave five stars. I logged out

1:09:42

account. Oh, are you watching Joker?

1:09:45

Yeah, okay. Yeah five stars for

1:09:47

Joker. Oh, yeah All

1:09:50

right, and what's her name have her own movie? Marco

1:09:53

Robbie. Yeah. Yeah, the Harley Quinn. Yeah, there's

1:09:55

a Harley Quinn movie Do you follow friends

1:09:57

on letterbox and go like he gave them? Oh,

1:10:00

you don't even know the half of it. That's

1:10:02

the fun of Letterbox. I don't even know the

1:10:04

half of it. You know when you read people's

1:10:07

bad tweets? Letterbox is the same thing but with

1:10:09

movie reviews. So you'll see a movie where you're

1:10:11

like, that's stunk. And then you go on and

1:10:13

you're like, this movie was fantastic. Some friend of

1:10:15

yours. Oh my god. Your friend Peter Griffin. That's

1:10:17

so funny. That's

1:10:20

really funny. This

1:10:22

Letterbox review is by Adam Bolt.

1:10:25

Batman is the world's greatest detective

1:10:27

because he can draw a smiley face on

1:10:29

photos with a sharpie. And he was

1:10:31

like, he's the joke. That is funny. That is

1:10:33

pretty funny. It's

1:10:36

Kyle said. Adam gave

1:10:38

four stars. It's Kyle gave four and a

1:10:40

half stars. Alfred is the biggest voyeur out

1:10:42

there. That is true. Alfred's

1:10:45

horny. Okay, so what's a

1:10:47

one sentence review you would give the film? Well, I'll

1:10:49

do that. Mm-hmm. Mitch.

1:10:53

Not horrible but horny. Okay.

1:10:57

How many stars? That's

1:11:00

funny. Thank you. I give

1:11:02

it either two and a

1:11:05

half or three stars. Three stars. Okay. Which

1:11:07

for me is like, it's fine. Yeah. I

1:11:10

think that it is a little bit boring for, and I

1:11:15

love the animated series. And when I saw this, I was

1:11:17

like, Joker has like planes

1:11:19

and like he comes in way

1:11:21

later. This movie needed Joker to

1:11:23

even inject some fun into

1:11:25

the movie. Yeah. I liked

1:11:27

the horniness of it. There's a lot of weird parts of

1:11:30

it, which we've gone over and it just, I don't know.

1:11:32

If I'd seen it in 93, maybe it would be a

1:11:34

five star movie. Yeah, fair.

1:11:36

But I'm not nostalgic for it. So. Fair.

1:11:40

I'm going to give it one star. Horny, but

1:11:42

I did not have fun with the horniness.

1:11:45

Yeah, I'm going to give it, this is

1:11:48

where I always get confused because I'm trying to I'm

1:11:50

going to give it one star. Um,

1:11:54

really slow. Good romance.

1:11:57

Like the twist. Still one star.

1:12:02

Your review of it is like a review

1:12:04

of UCB theater for a lot of people.

1:12:06

What was it? Horniness,

1:12:08

but I did not enjoy the horniness. When

1:12:13

like a person comes in off the street and like,

1:12:15

why did I get a jerk off during that? I

1:12:17

thought I was supposed to be comedy. Really

1:12:20

funny? Alright,

1:12:22

Nick, what do you say? Loved

1:12:26

it as a boy and today. It's

1:12:29

the Bat! Five stars! Nice, that's a

1:12:31

good review. I like that

1:12:33

review. It's commas.

1:12:37

So please everyone out there write a review of Apple Podcasts,

1:12:40

it can be very simple. And

1:12:42

we will pick one to read on the next episode

1:12:44

and of course rate us on Spotify which takes .2

1:12:46

seconds. Yeah, Mitch Weiger,

1:12:48

do you guys have anything you want to plug?

1:12:51

Hmm. Doughboys

1:12:53

I guess? I guess

1:12:56

so. I love doughboys. I

1:12:59

love doughboys. It's always funny.

1:13:03

I always have such a good time when I do

1:13:05

it. It's always so fun. Because

1:13:07

you're so funny and I think it's the only thing Nick and I

1:13:09

question about you is that you like the podcast. Well,

1:13:13

I'm broken in the brain. We're

1:13:18

going to be back next week with the 1995 movie Batman

1:13:20

Forever. What

1:13:22

do you know about this? Nothing.

1:13:25

I thought it was George Clooney but apparently it's

1:13:27

Val Kilmer and I had no idea Val Kilmer

1:13:29

was a Batman. So I'm pretty excited.

1:13:32

I didn't realize it was Val Kilmer either. I had no

1:13:34

idea who it was but I'm excited. Why'd you laugh? I

1:13:37

feel like... I'm going to

1:13:39

listen to this episode and it's going to be very

1:13:41

funny to hear you guys react to this movie. It's

1:13:43

insane in a lot of ways. I'm more... Batman

1:13:47

and Robin I'm more interested in hearing. We

1:13:50

get Jim Carrey in this one. And who else do

1:13:52

we get? Tommie Lee Jones. Tommie

1:13:55

Lee Jones. Is Zuma

1:13:57

Thurman in that? She's

1:14:00

in one, right? She's in one, right? Okay.

1:14:02

And Tommy Lee Jones... I feel like Batman Forever was the one

1:14:04

all these people were in. I don't

1:14:06

know. I mean, I just don't know. Tommy Lee

1:14:09

Jones has that quote about Jim Carrey that came

1:14:11

from them working together on this, right? Yeah. Well,

1:14:14

it was something about his buffoonery. It's a great quote. I cannot

1:14:16

tolerate your buffoonery. I think that's what it is. Wow. I'm

1:14:19

sure we'll get into that. And then

1:14:21

who's Iceman? That's Arnold, but

1:14:24

that's in... Yeah, Mr. Freeze. Mr. Freeze. He'll

1:14:26

be in... Yeah, he'll be in

1:14:28

Batman and Robin. And he says, Ice to

1:14:30

meet you. Pretty funny. Very

1:14:32

different from Mr. Freeze in Batman the

1:14:34

Animated Series. It's a great Mr. Freeze.

1:14:37

All right. Well, I look forward to that. Will

1:14:39

we learn Mr. Freeze's origin story? Why is he

1:14:41

so chilly? I mean, do

1:14:43

we learn everyone's origin stories? Yes, you're

1:14:45

going to learn everyone's origin stories multiple

1:14:48

times. Oh, actually, it depends on... Sometimes you

1:14:50

do, sometimes you don't. But yeah. Okay. All

1:14:53

right. Let me get a little context for Mr. Freeze.

1:14:55

He's a tragic figure. He's tragic. All

1:14:57

right, can't wait. Well, I'll be watching that soon.

1:14:59

And we'll see you here in a poll. Bye,

1:15:02

everybody. Bye. News

1:15:20

Embers is a production of Headgum Studios.

1:15:22

Our producer is Ali Khan.

1:15:25

Our executive producer is Anya

1:15:27

Khaniskaya. The show is edited,

1:15:29

mixed, and mastered by Saris Manchi,

1:15:31

who also composed our theme song.

1:15:34

Follow us on Letterboxd at Newcomers and

1:15:37

leave us a review on Apple Podcasts. We

1:15:39

might just read it on the next show.

1:15:41

Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na,

1:15:43

na, na, bye. That

1:15:49

was a Headgum original.