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daily content with Reddit stories and

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other great things, go search Redditor,

0:21

R-E-D-D-I-T-O-R, wherever you get

0:23

your podcasts. My

0:26

girlfriend has been living a lie for a year

0:28

and this comes from my shanker. Ouch.

0:31

My girlfriend and I have somewhat of an

0:33

age gap relationship. We met when she was

0:35

19 and I was late 20s. How

0:39

late? She

0:43

sat her sights on me and pursued me. We

0:46

saw each other on and off when she

0:48

was home from college and we developed a

0:50

sort of part-time relationship. Because of the age

0:52

difference, I was always careful not to let

0:54

things get too far because I wasn't sure

0:56

how it would work out. And admittedly, I

0:58

kept her at arm's length for a couple

1:00

of years and she told me that she

1:02

felt in limbo for those years. And I

1:04

honestly feel guilty about that now. Yeah,

1:07

like maybe sending like mixed signals. Yeah,

1:10

he's like, well, I'm

1:12

confused about the part-time thing. What

1:15

is considered a part-time relationship?

1:19

When you get a side check? Okay, okay.

1:22

Putting in the extra hours. Anyway,

1:25

she matured a lot through college and I

1:27

helped her through some tough social problems. Probably

1:33

I brought her like sorority. Yup.

1:36

And our relationship grew and grew until recently.

1:39

Halfway through her senior year when I was 35

1:42

probably, I

1:45

finally wised up and realized I didn't want

1:47

to lose her and told her I wanted to

1:49

be with her long term. She

1:51

was relieved and happy. And while

1:53

it's tough to be separated geographically

1:56

and temporally because it's tough. the

2:00

age gap. Things have been overall great.

2:02

We both met on the East Coast. Her

2:04

junior year she transferred to a prestigious school

2:07

in California and I was very proud of

2:09

her and I began telling all of my

2:11

friends and later my family what kind of

2:13

genius I was seeing. I will

2:15

admit it was a point of pride. Fast

2:17

forward to this past winter when we

2:20

finally had a talk establishing a relationship

2:22

and we began speaking more frequently. It's

2:24

been nightly FaceTime telling each other how

2:26

much we miss each other. So

2:29

it seems like it's going well. Everything's

2:31

fine. It's going to go great right?

2:33

It was difficult having finally entered into

2:35

a full fledged relationship, not a part

2:37

time relationship, but being 3,000 miles

2:40

away I guess was hard. Well

2:42

things went this way until last

2:45

night. Oh. When

2:47

she abruptly told me she

2:50

hadn't been honest with me. Oh.

2:52

She's part time. She's part

2:54

time. And

2:57

I think OP thought this because I thought maybe

2:59

there was someone else and I was prepared for

3:01

that because she's in college after all. But

3:04

no. She tells me that

3:07

she has been going to a different

3:09

college, not more than an

3:12

hour away from me for the

3:14

last full year. Oh. He

3:17

thought they were long distance. He

3:19

thought she was on the west

3:21

coast and he was on the east coast.

3:23

Turns out she's been on the east coast

3:25

this entire time an hour away from him.

3:27

Oh my gosh. What did they think about?

3:30

Crazy. Literally makes, I'm

3:32

so confused. Also I feel like

3:34

I would have known. You know?

3:36

Well time zone difference. Like oh

3:38

wait it's what we were calling it

3:40

7 and it's light

3:43

out by you. Bro. Come on use

3:45

your big brain. Use your geograss your brain.

3:47

Wait what was she giving him or what

3:49

was he giving her? I don't know his

3:52

money. Was he giving her money? No

3:54

no he wasn't giving her money. Oh okay. I'm

3:56

more confused now. He was giving her love. Prince

4:00

Actional Riley. What the age gap

4:02

you would think. True, true, true can be. The

4:05

motive behind this was that back when she

4:07

was transferred out due to tuition costs, she

4:09

was unsure if we were going to continue

4:11

our relationship and she felt embarrassed and thought

4:13

I would think less of her for leaving

4:15

such a prestigious school because she left a

4:18

prestigious school to go

4:20

to a... So

4:22

I guess what it sounds

4:24

like is she did go to the prestigious

4:26

school on the west coast for a little

4:28

bit but transferred out because of the cost.

4:30

Right. And now she's on the east coast. She

4:34

wanted me to think she was impressive and be

4:36

proud of her. She said that each detail about

4:38

her life and all her social relationships and all

4:40

the stories she told me about school all

4:42

really happened. It just happened an hour

4:44

away from me and not across

4:46

the country. She's

4:50

been lying for a year. That's such

4:52

a young college

4:54

age kid thing to be like, oh, I didn't want you to

4:56

think I like... It's like, who cares? Was

4:58

it cool? Also, who

5:00

cares? If you want a reminder that

5:03

he's dating someone 10 years younger, this

5:06

is fricking it. This is

5:08

it. The lack of maturity is

5:10

palpable and it makes sense because

5:12

she's in college. This

5:16

was an insane revelation for me. I started

5:18

thinking back to every conversation we've had and

5:20

the realization that she had been very careful

5:23

about telling me things about her life at

5:25

school by replacing the school name with the

5:27

other and she had to admit certain things

5:29

as to not give away her lie. Yes,

5:33

she might have been telling the core truth,

5:35

but there was a lot of little lies

5:37

that she had to do. She didn't change

5:39

details. She acted surprised about the weather, for

5:41

example, when I told her about a late

5:43

winter storm I'd had, assuming she wouldn't have

5:45

experienced the same thing. What I

5:47

didn't know is we were living through the same storm

5:50

because we were practically neighbors. I

5:53

realized she lied about traveling, texting me

5:55

that she boarded an imaginary plane when

5:57

she was supposedly traveling back across the

5:59

world. across the country. She

6:01

lied about what time she woke up and

6:04

went to sleep so as to maintain the

6:06

idea we were in different time zones. Oh.

6:10

What is concerning is

6:13

the fact that she was

6:15

so good at it. Yes.

6:17

She had been OP for a year. Yes,

6:19

I was trying to put my finger on it

6:21

and that is it. That's what's messed up. Yeah.

6:25

And maybe, it seems like it comes easy to her too.

6:27

I could lie to you for a year and you would

6:29

have no idea. Yeah,

6:32

dude, I, for me, instant

6:34

breakup. Instant breakup.

6:36

I don't, honestly, this

6:38

is all the information I would need. Ah,

6:43

no. I don't think I

6:45

would instant breakup on this one. I

6:47

would instant breakup. But. Immediately. It is, I

6:50

think too it might take a second for

6:52

it to, it sounds like

6:54

it's like dawning on OP, like oh, all the different

6:56

things. It takes a little bit for the order, guys.

6:58

But I definitely could. All

7:03

these guys. But I think

7:06

I could eventually breakup, but I don't,

7:08

I'm guessing I wouldn't do it.

7:11

Yeah, I would immediately. Like, no

7:13

question. Yeah. Riley, how about

7:15

you? Yeah, I would probably be breaking up. Because

7:17

I mean, I'm like, one,

7:20

why wouldn't you trust me with that information? And

7:22

two, the pride. Because it's

7:25

a big pride thing in my eyes. I

7:28

hate the stupidity of not wanting to be

7:30

seen as unprocessed. Yeah. Also,

7:32

how stupid that reason is,

7:35

but how smart all the lies are. Like,

7:38

in a year, she never blew her cover.

7:41

That is some next level

7:43

shit. We're breaking up, but you

7:45

should talk to this person. You're,

7:48

we're breaking up, but CIA? We

7:54

Have a special mission for you. Yeah, honestly. I

7:56

Mean, she'd probably be good, but she's living a

7:58

double life. Anyway. Hey.

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near you. I.

9:29

Didn't care for a second about the

9:31

Scorsese. I I care that he was

9:34

capable of fabricating this elaborate ruse. Yes,

9:36

if someone asked me about her and

9:38

where she was in the world, I

9:41

would have answered with as much certainty.

9:43

As the sky is blue, the have

9:45

by Barry conception of reality blown apart

9:48

like that is a melting my mind.

9:50

She's been down the road for. The.

9:52

Entire time. For. each year

9:55

the walls of her apartment i've been

9:57

looking at behind her on her face

9:59

on cause are not where I

10:01

had always imagined them to be. I'm

10:03

just blown away. His reality is just

10:06

crushed. But the details

10:08

she had to lie about to maintain

10:10

the facade are what are eating me

10:12

away most. I

10:14

asked for her mailing address multiple times and

10:16

it's no wonder I never got it. She

10:18

joined a team and promised to send me

10:20

pictures of her new uniform and never did,

10:22

obviously, because that would have ruined the lie.

10:25

All the minutia required to maintain it

10:27

is what is bothering me most. She

10:29

had to dodge things and omit things

10:31

and often straight up lie about things.

10:35

I assume sometimes on the fly. The

10:37

realization that she's capable of this is

10:39

profoundly upsetting. I don't know what

10:42

to do. She feels absolutely terrible and she's been

10:44

crying and I don't wanna just beat her

10:46

up about it anymore because there's no point.

10:48

I still love her but I feel betrayed

10:50

and made a fool. I

10:52

don't know what to do. Should OP

10:54

break up with his lying girlfriend? Possible

10:57

hot take. I am,

11:01

the lying is terrible but the reason

11:05

shows her lack of maturity so

11:07

much that if I'm in

11:11

OP's hypothetical shoes, I'm

11:13

like, the

11:15

lying is terrible and the immaturity

11:18

of the reason. I would just, the

11:20

10 year age gap would just be

11:23

magnified. There's

11:26

all these people that are like, oh

11:28

yeah, the age gap is big but

11:31

she's so mature or he's so

11:33

mature, whatever. And

11:35

in this case,

11:37

it's like, nah. She

11:40

is lying about something that

11:42

really wouldn't have

11:44

even mattered and it shows that she,

11:46

one, is insecure, two,

11:49

is massively manipulative and good at

11:51

it, and three, just like, she's

11:55

young, she's young. Yeah,

11:57

and I do in

11:59

a way. The I do feel bad for

12:02

her about the insecurity, but it

12:04

is such as to bid reason

12:06

to lie is the way she

12:08

did stupid reason by. Respect.

12:10

On her name look risk versus get

12:13

back to respect the like that. Cities.

12:17

In. Paris. In

12:21

like you have to have an insane

12:23

level of skill to pull something off

12:25

without like that in insane level of

12:27

skill which terrifies me. It does

12:29

all would. I don't think I would ever be with

12:31

someone. That. Skilled of life which is why

12:33

I would never dare Poker player. Oh

12:36

never even crossed my

12:39

mind. Wow. Very.

12:41

Point. What?

12:43

About a psychologist. Line

12:46

of the the thing out here. I thought I'd

12:48

remind them. Either one.

12:50

What about? like on? That. Marian.

12:54

Has be threatened and fifth Avenue but

12:56

a different road is a veterinarian so

12:58

my dog would be fine but a

13:00

lot Hide was with him off a

13:02

guide it died they'd veterinarian. how did

13:04

have an air as an excellent they've

13:06

done it does. Ah,

13:11

Ah rants about this

13:13

or that, that? So

13:15

ah. John. Breakup or

13:17

not Been. Like. A

13:19

rally break up. Break. Up

13:21

yes Decision? what do you think? Put your answers

13:23

the com as well. We'll have no break up

13:25

or not but same on want to break up

13:27

of the subsidies yet and I also want to

13:29

know why but the wanna. Because.

13:32

I have another story. Get

13:34

into it. My. bike share

13:36

to ted with a college playing on

13:38

a recent camping her back home how

13:41

do i respond to this oh man

13:43

sat close quarters that's tough my wife

13:45

and i have been married for a

13:47

couple of years now i knew that

13:50

back in college she had a one

13:52

experience with another girl will call this

13:54

girl katie this came after a breakup

13:56

the two of them had gone high

13:59

while watching netflix and one thing led

14:01

to another. Netflix and chill. Literally Netflix

14:03

and chillin. She told

14:05

me that she really enjoyed the experience

14:07

but it had never happened again with

14:09

her or any other ladies. Okay.

14:12

I do have reason to suspect

14:14

from our personal spicy sleep life

14:16

that she is still attracted to

14:19

women. Probably bye. Probably bye.

14:21

Probably bye. Recently my

14:23

wife visited her hometown to see friends

14:25

and family. I couldn't go due

14:27

to work commitments. Over the weekend she went

14:29

camping with some old friends. Apparently

14:32

Katie was there. My

14:35

wife claims that she didn't know this would

14:38

happen. Okay fine. They came up for one

14:40

night and my wife comes home a few

14:42

days later. As we talk

14:44

about the trip it slips out that my

14:46

wife wasn't able to find her old camping

14:48

gear. I just lost it

14:51

you know. I looked for it everywhere.

14:53

Mm-hmm and you know I didn't have a sleeping

14:55

bag either. I'm so cold. And I lost all

14:57

my clothes. It was crazy. I had to stay

15:00

warm. Oh I had to. I would have frozen

15:02

to death. Yeah. Do you want me to freeze

15:04

to death? Do you want me to die? Wow.

15:06

So you know I had to huddle up like

15:08

the penguins in March of the Penguins. I had

15:10

to do it. Not to do it. Body on

15:12

body. Fur on fur. Waddling. Beak

15:15

on beak. Yep. Meat

15:17

on meat. So

15:21

whose tent did she use?

15:24

It comes out that she ended

15:26

up sharing a tent with Katie.

15:28

Ooh. A one person tent. You're

15:31

joking. One person tent. You're joking.

15:35

You're telling me there wasn't one other person that

15:37

she could have shared with? Nobody.

15:40

No nobody on earth. Dude they're

15:42

they're butt to nuts. Or

15:45

butt to butt. Butt to butt

15:47

butt to butt butt

15:50

to butt to butt butt to butt. Cut. Buts out scissors. They're

15:53

butt to cut dude. That's cut. That's pretty

15:55

good. She claims nothing

15:57

happened but I am highly skeptical now.

16:00

The whole thing just reeks to me.

16:03

I don't really have any evidence at this

16:05

point, but I'm tempted to go through her

16:07

phone when I get the chance. How should

16:09

I proceed? And we have some top comments

16:11

that are responding to everything in the story

16:13

and an update, but let's

16:16

pause right here. If you

16:18

go through her phone, you are damaging the

16:20

relationship. Just to be clear, to be clear.

16:22

You're now committing an A-hole move. You are

16:24

committing an A-hole move and you are destroying

16:27

the trust in the relationship. Don't do that.

16:29

Don't do it. Don't do that. But

16:34

maybe like, hey, I feel uncomfortable

16:38

with what you did. And

16:43

is there any way that you can make me feel more comfortable? That's

16:46

awesome. That's

16:49

awesome. Yeah, because

16:52

you can share how

16:54

it made you feel, and you're not even

16:56

attacking her in that stance, but

16:58

you're still communicating that like, I don't like

17:01

this. I don't want

17:03

this kind of thing to happen. And she'll probably,

17:05

it's pretty weird, dude. It's

17:08

pretty wack. If I had a significant other

17:10

share a one person

17:12

tent with someone they had hooked up with in the

17:14

past, especially like

17:17

the only other person they had hooked up

17:19

with. Yes. I

17:22

would be pretty uncomfortable. Also, so I

17:25

was gonna double check. So she went home to see family and

17:27

friends because I was like, what if she had like a cousin

17:29

or something that she could share a tent with? It

17:32

was only friends that went on the

17:35

camping trip, but presumably she didn't hook

17:37

up with any of the other friends

17:40

on the trip. So it's just like, just ask

17:42

to stay in one of their tents. Yeah.

17:45

And also think about your partner too,

17:47

right? Like if I'm in that situation,

17:50

I would probably be

17:52

like, oh, my partner might not

17:54

be comfortable with that. Exactly. And

17:56

just say that. Maybe

17:59

she's not thinking about it. I don't know.

18:01

You know what? But you know what I'm

18:03

always comfortable with, John? What? People

18:05

hitting that frickin' subscribe button. Oh, so

18:07

cozy here. Be butt to cut with

18:09

that subscribe button right now. I'm so

18:11

subscribed. Slam it. I'm warm

18:13

in the arms of my subscription. I

18:17

wanna hear the rest of the story. Okay,

18:19

so, potenttechnicality says, I'd bring

18:21

up the fact that she shared a one person

18:23

tent with someone she slept with in the past.

18:25

That's a horrible choice and she doesn't get a

18:27

pass because they're both women. Bill2550

18:30

says, sounds like the trickle

18:32

truth is beginning. Trickle

18:35

truth, yep. Classic case of trickle truth

18:37

about tickles. Cause it, he

18:39

didn't even say, oh, she told me.

18:41

It slipped out. Slipped out. She

18:44

couldn't find her camping gear and gosh

18:46

darn, so lucky Katie was there to

18:48

share hers. Did they get high

18:50

together? Did they cuddle? Kiss?

18:55

Yeah, did they? I mean, this is old friends.

18:57

Were they frickin' token up? Puffin'

18:59

and passin'? It's possible. If

19:01

you grill her a little and she admits

19:03

to more of it, then borrow her phone

19:06

and posing as her, send Katie a text.

19:08

What was your favorite part of camping together?

19:11

Then tell her to sit with you

19:13

until Katie responds. Then

19:15

also tell her this is her last chance to

19:18

tell you the full truth. Okay, so let me

19:20

make sure I'm reading this part of the comment

19:22

right. I think I

19:24

understand it. So basically, tell

19:26

her, hey, send Katie this

19:28

text. Yeah, hey, I feel

19:30

uncomfortable. I think a way

19:32

that you can make me feel more comfortable is

19:35

if I send

19:37

her a text from your phone,

19:39

basically asking the favorite part of

19:41

it and we sit together until

19:43

she responds. Totally, yeah. I,

19:46

yes, I think that's true. How

19:48

exactly do you think she would feel if

19:50

you spent the night in a

19:53

one man tent with a woman you had

19:55

a one night stand with? Just

19:57

because you're the same sex does not make

19:59

it okay. unless you are okay with

20:01

it. It's a lot harder to be

20:03

walked on when you're standing up. Whoa.

20:06

Fire bar. Dang. And

20:08

the final, read one comment here, sounds

20:11

premeditated and they were

20:13

intimate and not by accident. Oh

20:16

gosh, I forgot my tent. Not

20:19

buying it. I'm also, I

20:22

find it hard to believe that she didn't know

20:24

that the friend was coming. Like

20:26

this sounds like an old friend reunion.

20:30

I think she knew the friend was coming. Okay,

20:34

because I believe in that part of

20:36

the story it

20:39

sounds like she didn't know the friend was coming. In

20:42

the earlier part of the story, if

20:44

she knew the friend was coming and didn't tell

20:47

OP, that is also a red

20:49

flag. Yeah, let me see. It

20:52

sounds like red

20:54

flag if she knew the friend was coming and didn't say

20:56

anything to OP. Red flag.

20:58

You're right. If, which I don't

21:01

think is the case, but how

21:03

did she, when you do a camping trip,

21:06

everyone's in a group chat, you're all like

21:08

linking up. There's like things

21:10

to plan. There's no

21:12

way OP didn't

21:14

know she was gonna be there. Yeah, apparently Katie

21:16

was there. My wife claims that she didn't know

21:18

this would happen. I'm

21:21

calling BS on that. Yeah, I think so. They may

21:23

not have hooked up, but. A BS on that. Yeah,

21:26

well, we might have an answer. Mr.

21:29

Donner. Okay. There's

21:32

a fix. Yep, set. Ended

21:34

up talking with one of our mutual friends who

21:36

went on this trip. She confirmed

21:39

my suspicions saying that my

21:41

wife and Katie were acting

21:43

weird and even sneaking

21:45

off together at times. Oh,

21:49

brutal. Total brutal. Okay,

21:51

confirmed. I used this information

21:54

to confront my wife and she eventually caved

21:56

and let me see her phone. I

21:59

went through her texts. with Katie to

22:01

see that they had been texting and

22:03

flirting for the past few weeks even

22:05

sending each other provocative selfies and

22:08

reminiscing about what happened on the

22:10

camping trip. Oh do we know

22:12

can we guess what happened on

22:14

the camping trip? But to cut

22:17

can we guess I

22:19

was able to send most of these

22:21

messages to my computer in case it's

22:24

needed for the divorce proceeding. And

22:29

that little sentence tells me it's

22:32

not looking too good for the

22:34

relationship. Looking like a divorce. Capital

22:37

truth. I appreciate

22:39

everyone's time and advice. It's a crappy

22:41

situation but I'm glad Tooley moving forward

22:43

and it closes out with these two

22:45

short and relevant comments. Banditage says time

22:48

to rip the band-aid off two years is

22:50

nothing and you're still young. She lied and

22:53

lied again. Trust is gone. No kids get

22:55

a lawyer and file. KJ says

22:57

yeah don't look back you deserve to

22:59

be with someone who mutually loves and

23:02

respects you and that is it ladies

23:04

and gentlemen. There are so many opportunities

23:06

like it was yeah I think the

23:09

thing that is rough about

23:11

this is it's more and

23:13

more obvious that this was a premeditated

23:15

thing. Now we didn't get a

23:17

thousand percent crystal clear confirmation of

23:20

this in the story. Everyone

23:22

watching Sam Riley do we think they hooked

23:24

up on the camping trip? Oh

23:26

yeah of course. A

23:31

hundred percent. Wait didn't she say

23:33

that that she reminisced? Yeah they

23:35

were reminiscing on the camping trip

23:37

about about hooking up. It said

23:40

they were reminiscing

23:42

about the camping trip. I'm

23:44

sending the spicy pictures to each other.

23:47

They were sending provocative selfies. Oh yeah.

23:49

They hooked. They hooked. You can't be

23:51

going on a camping trip and not

23:53

do that. Yeah. We got one more

23:55

story. If

24:00

you name their stories, because

24:02

we got three more stories. Let's do it. Oh

24:05

god, I'm in pain! Oh

24:07

no, Doctor! Is there anything we

24:10

can do to save our boy, John?

24:12

He needs five cc's of Spotify review

24:14

stars, statch! There's only one way we

24:16

can do that. You listening right now

24:18

go to OKOB's profile page, click

24:20

about, and rate it by stars.

24:23

We're all off! I'm

24:26

so sorry your podcasters are

24:28

dead. Now we're ghosts! Rate

24:30

us five stars or we'll haunt you

24:33

forever. Do it.