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0:41

What's up heroes? It's Dylan, your host and

0:43

Game Master, back with the finale of Epic

0:45

Mundane. And I have since played

0:47

this game again with other friends offline, and

0:49

it's truly living up to being a new

0:52

staple of a pick and play, pick up

0:54

and play game in my life. It

0:57

has been added to the coffee table

0:59

collection, so to speak. So thank you,

1:01

Ryan, for making such a fun little

1:03

romp of a game. And truly with

1:05

that, let's see how this finale shakes

1:07

out. It's

1:10

a romp. The

1:13

cyclone starts choking, and you're

1:15

doing this to try and

1:17

get the pigeons out, right?

1:27

That's the goal. Yeah, ultimately. If

1:29

you succeed at that, I think that

1:31

like, as this creature is

1:33

choking, it kind

1:35

of like, becomes, dissolves a little

1:38

bit around the edges. And like,

1:40

I think that Leonard and Skinner are both

1:42

able to make a break for it as

1:44

they flee from the body of the cyclone.

1:47

But then it like, it like,

1:49

and the can just

1:52

comes like, whipping

1:54

back out, and

1:57

is going to, I don't know how to

1:59

determine if it hits somebody. or something. I

2:01

think we need to make eagle roll.

2:04

Stop it from hitting. Yeah, that's the

2:07

one. There's one of your birds shoots

2:09

out of that typhoon and a can

2:12

whippled out like after it. There's

2:15

no one fast enough. Excited

2:17

to hear you. Yeah, no. I

2:20

at first it's like I'm

2:22

applauding USB like wow. And

2:25

then I see the bird go

2:27

and then the can go and

2:30

I have to I got to intercept and so

2:32

I'm running. I'm

2:35

running but I run in a way that I also flap

2:38

my arms. Yeah, just of course. It's like the Naruto Ravi.

2:40

Yeah, you're going to wake them slightly. Yeah, a six, a

2:42

five and one. And then you're like ahh. Stop. You

2:45

want to describe what happens please. This

2:54

is a pretty good success. Yeah,

2:57

I think it's

3:00

a full tilt sprint and

3:02

I run and the

3:05

arms flapping and I get up a small

3:08

flight of stairs. I jump onto the

3:11

pole and jump and kick off of

3:14

this handrail that people usually use for skating

3:16

on. Oh, yeah. For

3:20

a second it's almost as

3:22

if I'm flying and

3:24

get past like

3:26

skinnered right in

3:28

front of me and then I. I have to leave.

3:30

Exactly. It's exactly like that.

3:32

That's playing in my head and

3:35

catch the can. Take the can to the chest. You

3:39

take the can to the chest? Yeah,

3:41

all for my skinnered. All for my

3:43

big boy. This

3:51

can was moving at speed so I

3:53

think that it's probably going to do some

3:55

damage to you. At

3:57

the very least. Breath taken away.

4:00

Maybe that's what the one is for. At

4:02

the least, at the very least. You're

4:04

actually like full anime style. The can,

4:06

you like, it's slow motion. You jump

4:09

in front of, was it Skynyrd or

4:11

Leonard? It's Skynyrd. Skynyrd, you

4:13

jump in front of Skynyrd and you catch

4:15

the can to the chest and there's

4:17

just like this explosion and then an

4:19

explosion of smoke against like one

4:21

of the, one

4:24

of the like towers. There's like a clock

4:26

tower or some shit in the park and

4:28

there's just like a, as you go straight into it

4:31

and then fall down to the ground and

4:35

like, like

4:38

the can goes skittering, still somehow

4:40

in one piece, goes skittering in

4:42

one direction and you

4:44

like roll to the side and your like breath

4:46

knocked out of you, probably gonna

4:48

get at least a bruise, full

4:51

anime moment. As

4:54

you save your bird, Leonard and

4:56

Skynyrd are free, but Mariah's still

4:58

stuck inside. A

5:02

swirling, Matt's

5:04

already got a hand raised. No, no, no,

5:06

this is my natural. What the fuck

5:09

is this? This is your natural hand

5:11

position? I would see, I see, it's

5:13

like this, it's like this. It

5:15

was like that, yeah. I was just holding the pencil

5:17

between my hands. See, you were giving professor Xavier is

5:19

what you're saying. A hotter,

5:22

like Christian Slater phase as you

5:24

did that. I'm

5:27

just imitating the very sexy Robin,

5:29

okay? That's the fucking,

5:31

the fuck, the thesis, the

5:33

equilibrium that Robin exists in is

5:35

Christian Slater. Is

5:39

Christian Slater the guy that we were talking

5:41

about last time? We were talking

5:44

about Christian Slater last time? No, I don't

5:46

think, no. Crispin Glovin. Oh, there we

5:48

go. Crispin Glovin. Crispin

5:52

Glovin, the guy that's my character,

5:54

too, is based on. It's based

5:57

on. Crispin Glovin. That's

5:59

a different. He looks what like in

6:01

that movie it looks like what I imagine

6:04

Eagle to look like it's just Christian

6:06

Slater all of our characters look like

6:09

Crispin Glover Illegal

6:15

Avengers team name will be the Christians One

6:19

person on the planet that looks like Crispin

6:21

Glover is already more than enough It's like the

6:26

Cuz you look so much like Crisp

6:28

Crispin Glover Yeah

6:31

Crispin Glover does Too

6:40

many It's a lot of Too many One

6:43

Crispin Glover is too crispy. I'm so

6:45

sorry to Crispin Glover who is

6:48

listening right now. I I'm not. I appreciate you.

6:50

Come on the show. We'll we'll settle it

6:52

here. We'll settle it on the mic Do

6:56

should we recap what we did last time? We

6:59

have our characters So

7:01

we have I think that's

7:04

a good idea. I think that's a fair idea Heroes

7:06

we had some we had some Audio-technical

7:09

difficulties last time so we're gonna be picking up Sort

7:12

of where we left off Unless

7:14

we forget where that was so I

7:21

Am playing toot Whose

7:23

special power is beans and wants to

7:25

make the best bean salad ever Toot

7:28

right now is a third

7:30

class hero But I'm

7:33

only one die away from being

7:36

able to level up to level two Who

7:40

else we got? I'm playing

7:42

una ravel and my Superpower

7:45

is that I can untie things

7:47

or unravel like angle wires and

7:50

stuff I'm

7:52

still a fourth class hero. I'm right there at the

7:54

beginning, but I'm making my way. I Die

7:57

so as soon as I get an Oh,

8:01

as soon as I get another one, I'm up to

8:03

third class. Hell yeah. Ooh. Yeah.

8:07

I'm playing Ulysses Scott

8:09

Burnham or USB.

8:11

Ugh. I forgot about

8:13

that. I want

8:15

to be a professional esports player

8:17

and I can plug in USBs

8:19

correct the first time. However,

8:22

I have upgraded and now

8:24

a third class hero, I

8:26

believe. And that means

8:28

I can get anything in correctly the

8:31

first time. But only the first time.

8:34

Only the first time. Only

8:36

the first time. Afterwards, I need to at least give

8:38

it a try, but I can shoot

8:41

hoops. Shoot that first hoop

8:43

like nobody's business. I have

8:45

questions for you afterwards regarding

8:47

these powers. Candice, I'm glad that you

8:49

said it because I was trying so hard not to

8:51

make that joke. There was a pause there where

8:53

I waited for people to say it. I've

8:56

been surprised that no one has so far because I've

8:59

thought about it every time. I was like, well, it's

9:01

uncouth if I bring it up. We're trying to

9:03

keep it peaceful. Yeah. I

9:09

have been playing Eagle. Eagle!

9:12

And. Oh my god. Yeah.

9:15

And Eagle is great at starting

9:17

pigeons. That's his power. But

9:20

he has since ascended into third class

9:22

or third tier in which

9:24

he is pretty good at employing pigeons and

9:26

asking them to do things. Yeah. And

9:29

I think we've established that he can understand pigeons too. Yeah.

9:33

Yeah. And he wants to fly. Oh

9:35

yeah. His dream is to fly. Yeah. If

9:38

you're a pigeon, submit your resume. Take

9:42

an application. You've got spots on the hill. Eagle

9:44

is hiring. So

9:46

I guess that leaves me. I'm flossing

9:49

fast. Flossy! I'm

9:51

really good at applying band-aids. My

9:53

dream is that I'd like to be a stunt person

9:55

someday. Yeah. My vice

9:57

fool is only four because I'm just a wee baby. Oh,

10:00

we've been bad. Oh Okay

10:04

That's everyone so we're

10:07

gonna get back to roughly where we left off

10:09

and and by that I mean we're gonna get off

10:12

to Exactly where I remember

10:14

which is that? Fuck

10:17

me. I got I got I got

10:19

you if you want to do What

10:22

just happened? Do I do

10:24

it? Is it my shitty

10:26

headphones are hold on are

10:28

literally taped together like this either They're

10:30

like sell a tape. I don't want

10:33

to say it So don't So

10:53

a a dust

10:55

storm Has

10:58

turned into a sort of

11:00

typhoon that has Flung

11:04

eagle and also

11:06

two of the pigeons named

11:09

Lynyrd and skinnered one

11:12

of them got flung for sure maybe

11:14

both. Mm-hmm and U.S.

11:18

East USB got attempted

11:20

murdered out the window but has

11:25

Has stopped it and now is

11:27

everybody fully outside and on the ground. Oh,

11:30

yeah, we're all outside. We're on the ground

11:32

We met up we met up in the

11:34

yeah, we're all here. We've watched Eagle get

11:37

fucking beamed literally

11:47

Really cool shit where you know got it

11:49

in on the first try It was being things

11:52

threw it into the mouth of the cyclone monster

11:54

and then the monster spit it out Trying

11:56

to get Leonard slash skinnered and you

11:59

go say saved the

12:01

bird, took it in the chest. Yeah, it's

12:03

like the can of beans to the chest.

12:06

Very anime. I think there's like dust settling.

12:08

I mean, it's like a clock down or something like that. Yeah.

12:11

Yeah. I was in the GM seat, I think, when we

12:13

left off. If anybody wants to... Also,

12:16

clarification. Dylan, when I'm the GM, does that

12:18

mean that I get the podcast too? You

12:23

get to... Yeah, you get full control over

12:25

the heroes as well. Okay, so whoever...

12:27

Whoever... I'm the man. Yeah.

12:30

I'm the episode. Get to the show. I know

12:33

that you also like... This is how James should have done it the

12:35

first time. I understand that

12:37

you've put a lot of effort into picking the

12:39

new host for the show. I, however, have a

12:41

better idea. How about we

12:43

make it a fashion advantage? Dueling

12:46

banjos of... Uh-huh.

12:49

Uh-huh. Perfect. I'm

12:53

gonna relinquish my DM hands because I feel

12:55

like I want somebody else to take

12:58

control of this little toboggan. Well,

13:00

Dylan, do you want to ease us back

13:02

in to the world

13:04

and the setting and then we can have

13:07

a... Sure. I

13:09

think it's at this point that the

13:13

sort of cyclone expands

13:19

and is gonna like sort of rush

13:22

off to the beach. It's

13:24

gonna just like pick up a bunch of water.

13:27

There's a beach? Yeah. We've been

13:29

at a skate park. Oh, yeah. Which

13:32

is usually like I think like right on the

13:34

beach. Oh, yeah. Everything on the skate park

13:36

is. Because I've learned everything that I know about California

13:38

from movies from

13:40

the 90s. So I'm assuming that.

13:44

And so it's gonna like go to like shoot

13:46

out into the beach and like gather up a

13:48

bunch of water. And now like

13:51

this sort of like

13:53

rainstorm has gathered overhead. And

13:55

the sandstorm itself is like.

14:00

coming back around. I know

14:02

you want me to. And like building

14:04

itself up full of like

14:06

water that's sort of like encircling

14:08

it in like these. But

14:10

we simply don't have the license. Sort

14:12

of sharp edges

14:15

around like the center of the cyclone.

14:19

For Darude's sandstorm, I'm

14:21

sorry. You'll just have to imagine it.

14:24

And it is sort of heading back your

14:26

way. You have

14:28

like, we all have probably like five

14:31

minutes before it's back into like

14:33

the town where people

14:35

are again. Pound

14:39

town. Does

14:43

USB know Flossy before

14:45

today? I feel like he just

14:47

met. Just met. So

14:49

I don't know their

14:52

prowess of being able to

14:54

put on first

14:56

aid things really well. That

15:00

might be new. Although she was like

15:02

putting on little plasters when you

15:04

all rolled up, I think. I was plastering

15:06

the little holes in the ground so we

15:09

wouldn't have as many dust devils. Oh,

15:11

yeah. I tell you what

15:14

then, USB will see you doing

15:16

that. Or

15:18

rather like see like a first aid kit.

15:20

And then look toward Eagle who is just

15:23

again, literally like almost has a hole

15:25

through them through how hard they got

15:28

beamed. Hey, I don't suppose

15:30

that you could get

15:32

our little guy over here

15:34

all built up and ready so we can go

15:36

take that thing on. Are

15:40

you like talking to me? Hey,

15:47

listen, all I see, the only person in the world right

15:50

now is you and me. We're the only two people, of

15:52

course I'm speaking to you. I

15:58

made a hard character choice with my guy right now. Big

16:04

swings. I

16:06

think Fluffy looks at you and hands

16:08

you like a fistful of

16:11

little plastic packets of

16:13

band-aids while making way too much eye contact

16:15

and like they lean in. Well,

16:19

whatever you need, I'm here for

16:21

you. I've been like

16:23

talking to Una a little bit today,

16:25

but I don't know, like maybe, I

16:27

don't know,

16:30

like maybe she wouldn't mind like we're trying to

16:32

save the world. So I just

16:35

like have to consider that they're like,

16:37

you know, just like other, just stay

16:39

right here. And

16:42

she runs away to Una

16:44

and tries to bring her

16:46

back with them. Oh yeah,

16:48

absolutely. Yeah, for sure. So

16:52

I was like helping this person.

16:56

What is your name? Zip drive? Oh,

16:59

my name? Yeah.

17:04

Ulysses Scott Burnham, but you can call me USP. Don't

17:06

worry about it. USB. Right.

17:09

Sorry. Okay. So USB

17:11

was here talking to me and watching as I was

17:14

like trying to save the world since you like so

17:16

dashingly saved me earlier today. And

17:20

I was wondering, would you be okay if like

17:22

he just like wanted to make me his Sun

17:24

Moon and stars? Because it's like, that's the vibe

17:26

that I'm getting right now from this person. But

17:29

like, they're like really interested. And like,

17:31

I had a really good time with you and I'm

17:33

still super interested. But also, I just like wanted to

17:35

make sure that like, everybody was cool.

17:37

And we just like have a nice time. Oh,

17:41

wow. Flossie,

17:45

I'll be honest, I've never done anything like

17:47

this before. But like, to spend some time

17:49

with you. I'm so totally

17:51

down to give it a try. Okay,

17:54

can I just tell you I might fucking die. I

17:56

just might. Right now on this. Okay,

18:00

USB. What did you want to ask me

18:02

again to do what with you? Our

18:06

friend... Eagle's bleeding out.

18:09

And I'm cycloning Eagle! A dead eagle!

18:13

There's no eagles dying! And a cyclone

18:15

is heading your way. We've

18:19

got a bandage big enough to patch up this hole in our

18:21

little friend over here. Oh

18:24

my god, that's terrible. You

18:26

know what I can do though, is I'm

18:28

really good at sticking these plasters. So

18:31

I'm just going to make a little plaster quilt

18:34

that hopefully will be large enough to bridge

18:36

the gap of his entrails. Oh

18:41

my god, roll me some

18:43

dice and scottum, wishing for

18:45

some sixes. I want to

18:47

see... I

18:49

have a really hard time, you guys. Promise

18:53

me you'll still love me if I kill this guy. That's two

18:55

three's, a six and a five. Okay,

18:57

okay, okay. Alright, so you're going to add

18:59

another die to your dice pool. Hooray.

19:03

And you definitely succeed in

19:05

healing Eagle. Yeah,

19:08

so Eagle, you open your eyes and... Slottum

19:12

is like really, really close to

19:14

it. Are

19:16

you okay? Your friend

19:18

has been so worried about you. Why

19:21

are there pigeons everywhere? Is that a you thing or a me

19:24

thing? Is

19:26

Skidderd okay? Skidderd is my

19:28

pigeon. Oh,

19:31

that little guy? Yeah,

19:33

he's like, he flew into that tree. Okay,

19:38

that means he's safe. Oh my god. He

19:40

shit a lot, like a lot. Like

19:45

right after you dove in

19:47

front of him, he just

19:49

like, unleashed, man. That's

19:53

pretty par for the course for Skidderd. He's got IBS.

19:57

But my friend, he's... I

20:00

made sure that I was okay, it's amazing. Thank

20:02

you. Who are you?

20:05

My name's Eagle. Oh yeah, no,

20:07

we just met. We

20:09

met. Dylan, sorry, you're like bleeding

20:11

out. Maybe it's like all the blood's

20:13

leaving your brain, but yeah, we

20:16

just met each other. Hi. I'm

20:18

Una though. Una and

20:21

sorry, you are? Me?

20:23

Oh, I'm Flossy. Hello. Good

20:26

day to you too, Flossy. Did we save

20:28

the day? Oh my

20:31

god, what? Did we sleep? Best day

20:33

of my life. Cute

20:37

has been just eaten like fresh

20:39

raw beans out of the can.

20:41

Oh, that is. Calling

20:43

beans out of a can fresh is... Has

20:48

not drained the liquid, it's like soup. No.

20:53

You got that bean liquid. Hey, my guy.

20:56

You're pounding those beans. That's pretty cool. You

20:58

should come hang out with us. We should

21:00

try to figure this shit out together. Oh

21:03

yeah, there's definitely like... There's

21:06

like a real cyclone over there. Oh

21:08

yeah. The

21:11

cyclone definitely seems to be getting

21:13

closer and closer and

21:15

two is gonna come over to Eagle and be like,

21:18

it'll help you get stronger and like

21:20

gives you like a spoonful of

21:22

beans. Just rubs it in there. Yeah,

21:24

just gives you a spoonful. Roll.

21:27

Yeah. Roll for

21:29

beans. Roll for beans. I'm rolling for

21:31

beans baby. These

21:33

beans are gonna make you feel like God.

21:38

Cute watched Popeye and was like I could do

21:41

that with beans. All right,

21:43

I succeeded and I got another six. So

21:45

I'm going up to a class

21:48

two second-class hero. Damn. So I'm

21:50

back down to three dice. So

21:54

it I'm gonna say it was

21:56

like a medium success. It was about half. So

21:59

I'm thinking that these beans, first

22:01

of all, I think that

22:03

the particular brand of bean that I shoveled

22:06

into your face is like not,

22:08

it's not, it's not great. They're like, I

22:11

want to say Pinto. They're a

22:13

little hard. Like, you know, uncooked.

22:15

They're, they're not, they're not great

22:18

raw. It's

22:20

a can of beans without like the gravy or

22:22

the sauce. It's just the bean, the bean water.

22:25

What do you think that water is? Beans and beans.

22:27

Yeah, the bean. The bean. Water

22:30

isn't gravy, babe. I really feel like we need

22:32

to. Any liquid

22:34

that's at all flavored is gravy from

22:37

now on. Oh, that is, that is

22:39

powerful sauce. Okay.

22:42

You must be fires to into

22:44

the sun. Out of it. And

22:49

you hit it perfectly. It's incredible. And I think

22:51

now, about this time, you're starting to

22:53

feel back to your life. Back

22:57

to your old self between, uh, between

23:00

getting bandaged up and getting all your

23:02

like wounds filled in by philosophy fast

23:04

and having the energizing power of

23:07

being juice. Uh, now

23:09

in your system that you're all up

23:11

and ready to go. And it's just at that

23:13

time that this cyclone like comes circling

23:15

back around to this building that we're in

23:19

and Ulysses, you look up and

23:21

you see like out the window that

23:23

you were just pushed out of like

23:25

earlier is Frankie,

23:27

your nemesis. Cause like hanging out the

23:29

window, looking for you and like trying

23:31

to figure out where you are. And

23:34

the cyclone comes around and like just

23:36

yoinks him out of the zone. Frankie

23:42

is now spinning around in

23:46

this cyclone and Frankie's pissed.

23:48

And so I think the cycle is

23:50

coming around and Frankie swinging arm. Oh,

23:53

this is a puss in psycho now. You

23:59

said it, you said it had. edges too now

24:01

what edges of water it's

24:03

okay yeah yeah oh damn

24:06

okay we totally need

24:08

a way to slow the cyclone down whoa

24:10

that guy's punching hard that guy really

24:12

doesn't like you USB what's up with

24:14

that fuck

24:17

this mom I hate that yeah go years ago

24:22

really yeah it was an office party and I

24:24

didn't realize people just

24:27

kind of say that but

24:29

you mean it he brought his

24:31

yeah the office party yeah

24:34

both of them he has two moms and both

24:36

and the gay moms but they're bi and I

24:38

you know I had

24:41

a good good day on fortnight

24:43

so it's really particularly confident and

24:45

mom's do

24:49

play fortnight I mean a professional

24:51

quick to e-sports team break to

24:53

play trio

25:04

in fortnight and we

25:06

took home a victory royale and they thought that was

25:08

super good it

25:11

actually used to be all four of us because me

25:14

and Frankie we grew up together and

25:16

it was way more of a story

25:18

here like in four out of five cases

25:26

of somebody fucking someone else's mom it

25:28

has to do with fortnight oh

25:31

yeah yeah see

25:33

I thought it was gonna be like it's someone you

25:35

know no it's definitely a

25:41

fortnight for sure okay cool this fucking

25:43

sorry I asked what like what no

25:57

this cyclone is moving in one direction what if we

25:59

build up another power to make the wind

26:01

go in the other direction and then it

26:03

and then we like utilize it oh

26:05

shit like could we get pigeons

26:07

to go to fly fast the

26:09

other opposite way oh and make

26:11

like a like oh

26:15

wait okay eagle can

26:17

you get your pigeons to fly counter

26:21

counter um likewise

26:24

cyclone wise yeah I can do that

26:26

and then can

26:30

you use the power of beans

26:33

and the wind energy made from

26:35

beans like to speed

26:37

up the pigeons particularly fast

26:39

feed the pigeons there's

26:44

gonna be a really terrible side effect about

26:46

ten minutes later are you

26:51

saying you're gonna feed the pigeons and

26:53

they're gonna fart so they're gonna say

26:57

like nitro boost them I thought

26:59

you were saying that was gonna

27:01

eat all of the beans and

27:03

then his eye originally thought that

27:05

yeah then Una said the other

27:07

thing the other I don't want

27:09

to blast past this as it

27:12

were I did say

27:18

yeah you know what I meant to say

27:20

but it's funny what I did say yeah

27:22

all right yeah

27:42

I'm gonna feed your I'm gonna feed your pigeons

27:44

all these beans like a plan

27:48

come here a little guys and

27:50

like put all my

27:53

hands out why does it

27:55

sound so diabolical shouldn't

27:58

you get like a bonus because you

28:00

have this like pigeon whisperer assisting

28:02

you or something. Yeah, I was going to point

28:04

a button. I think we have to roll

28:07

for this. I think we've got to roll to convince the

28:09

pigeons to eat out of my fucking hand. I don't

28:11

think it's a pretty sight. But what's your

28:14

upgraded beans pallet? Does it have anything to

28:16

do with... Oh, it's beans question mark. It's

28:18

beans question mark. It was beans peeing now.

28:20

Oh, it's beans peeing now. And now it's

28:22

beans question mark. Yeah, exactly. So

28:24

we got quantum position, superposition beans. So the

28:27

future is going to be an exclamation point

28:29

and then you're all fucked.

28:31

Yeah. Beans,

28:34

beans. So I

28:36

got two successes. One of them was

28:38

a six, so I'm adding a new

28:40

diet at my dice pool. Damn. Oh,

28:43

I'm sorry. Lies. I got four successes.

28:45

Holy shit. Yeah, baby. Because I'm

28:47

a success here now, so I only fail on

28:49

a one. And I got none of those. So

28:51

now those pigeons... Well,

28:53

hold on, Eagle. How did you do? I

28:56

rolled two sixes and two ones. Hell

28:58

yeah. So that's like both ends

29:00

of the spectrum, best of both worlds, right?

29:03

It is. I think... What if I propose something

29:06

dark, what do you feel about it? Listen,

29:08

I am here. I

29:11

just think... I don't know if eating beans

29:13

is good for pigeons. I think that this

29:16

works. Oh,

29:18

I can't. But there might

29:20

be. Oh my God. I

29:22

see. I see. That's the wedding race

29:25

rule. You're going to have to put animal death as like

29:27

a content warning on the side note. Oh,

29:29

pigeons on animals. I'm okay with it.

29:32

Oh, get that fuck out of here. You're not so sure

29:34

about the idea. Oh, get this fuck out of here. You're

29:36

not you, Robin. You ripped right off my skin. You are

29:38

a nightmare. I'm

29:41

doing this in fiction. Don't you bring real

29:43

life pigeons into this? But

29:49

yeah, no, I'm in. I'm

29:51

not sure about Eagle, but I'm in. So the

29:53

pigeons eat the beans out of my

29:55

hand and then they start tooting and

29:58

they go flying so fast. Counter. Clockwise,

30:01

counter cyclone wise,

30:04

counter-wind, counter-clone wise. Counter-clone

30:07

wise, thank you so much. To the

30:09

cyclone and it starts to

30:12

miraculously slow down. And

30:14

I think as a consequence of that,

30:17

like the momentum is no longer keeping

30:19

Frankie in the air, punching. And

30:21

he just like sort of starts to drift down

30:24

until he just lands on

30:26

the grass, drags on the ground. However, if I may,

30:28

it does counter it. And

30:37

he slowly like floats down to the ground and

30:40

we're like, hell yeah, we won. But

30:43

then we like look at his face

30:45

and he's smiling. And

30:47

the aura of all

30:50

the beams farting and the cyclone

30:52

has made this like big storm

30:54

cloud in the sky that like

30:56

shoots one bolt of electricity. Now,

30:58

Frankie goes fucking super Satan. Oh

31:04

my God. Back up

31:06

in the air and the cyclone starts again. But

31:08

now it has like the head, the face and

31:10

the head of the cyclone is back. But now

31:12

it has like two arms and two legs and

31:16

he stood like a giant Kaiju

31:18

in the middle of wherever we

31:20

are. This city. The town

31:22

town. Yeah, town town. In

31:25

the middle of town town. And

31:28

it's like bolts of electricity are like

31:30

shooting off of him. And he is

31:33

like laughing maniacally as

31:35

seemingly this plan

31:37

that he may have had

31:40

is now coming to fruition. It

31:43

was Frankie all along. Oh,

31:46

God. Oh,

31:48

no. His

31:51

wives are so atrocious. Oh,

31:54

no. I get

31:57

being depressed, but like making it everyone else.

32:00

problem is so tacky you're

32:02

so right you're

32:04

so right Fluffy I

32:21

don't have so much I need a sound clip of

32:23

that I just

32:25

need that for personal delivery with

32:27

excellent okay

32:31

okay hear me out what if

32:33

I feel like there's like a lot of danger that

32:35

we might go flying I got a lot

32:37

of wires and I'm so good at

32:39

handling them what if we just like

32:41

tied everybody together we all get tied

32:43

up together in a totally platonic way

32:46

and then we just like stay anchored to

32:48

each other oh my god yeah

32:51

what if we get tied together but

32:54

then just to give us extra support Fluffy

32:57

can like use

32:59

their like band-aids to like make sure that

33:02

we're like fully stuck together I can

33:04

do that we can also

33:06

like you what's up I was

33:09

just gonna say like Fluffy can maybe make

33:11

like a little band-aid parachute and

33:13

then we can fly up there and start punching the

33:15

psych bone we can punch Frankie in the face would

33:18

you say get up there I knew there

33:20

was something special about you that's perfect for my tik-tok

33:31

what's tik-tok don't

33:35

worry about it oh yeah it's

33:37

gonna take me way too much time for it like

33:39

me to even begin to explain but it's gonna

33:41

make me famous someday I

33:43

want to be a stunt person oh yeah

33:46

I think that like launching myself

33:48

with my new best friends and

33:50

to potential love interests while

33:52

I am punching a punching cyclone just

33:54

sounds like something Hollywood won't be able

33:56

to get enough of it's gonna be

33:58

sick well no way Toots and Eagle, you're

34:00

two love interests, I'm totally into that. Both

34:04

laugh Neither

34:11

of them said that they were interested, but like, did you,

34:13

did they like say something about me?

34:16

Yeah, Toots, Eagle, how we feeling? Let's

34:18

make this Avengers a polycule. Both

34:21

laugh Every game.

34:25

Every game. For

34:31

context, for everyone. This is the guy.

34:36

You want to get your hands on this. I

34:40

would love to. Hell

34:44

yeah, Game of Thrones. We'll

34:46

be good, we'll be good. You're

34:48

a character. Alright,

34:51

so finding a bunch of

34:54

wires nearby and then handing

34:56

them to Una to unravel.

34:58

Oh yeah, hell yeah,

35:00

oh this helps so much. She went back

35:03

to her guitar case that holds a

35:05

shit ton of cables and one pair of electric spoons.

35:09

And she comes back and has

35:12

the wires in her hand and she's gonna wrap everybody

35:14

up together. Tie us all together

35:16

so that we're secure, but also

35:19

flexible. Yeah, you should do that.

35:23

And then, yeah, I guess we'll do one

35:26

at a time. Yeah, okay,

35:30

I got a fucking a four, four, a five, a two

35:32

and a six, which means I live a

35:34

long. Three,

35:36

three, three, three, four, five, hero. And

35:41

then that also means that you succeeded.

35:43

So you did, you did good. Yes,

35:46

I did good. Oh, these, we

35:48

are so tied together. We're

35:51

tied together. Yeah, flexibility

35:54

and security. Oh,

35:57

perfect. And then if Fluffy

35:59

is made. taking a parachute that's gonna catch us

36:01

in the updraft so we fly up, is that

36:03

correct? Yes. Perfect. How

36:07

many dice until I level to the next one? Six

36:16

dice? I take my six dice and I'm next. When

36:19

you succeed on five, right? You have three to

36:21

start, then four, five and then you level up.

36:23

Perfect. The next time you roll a

36:25

six, yeah. Roll a six. I

36:28

have three threes, a

36:31

four and a five. Ah,

36:34

dang. But that's definitely a six. It's

36:38

really pretty. It's like a patchwork quilt of

36:41

like all kinds of

36:44

shitty brands. So like Star

36:47

Tours and Hello Muscrats

36:50

and Chisney and all

36:53

these like fucked up brands. I

36:58

was not anticipating you having an encyclopedic

37:00

knowledge of band-aids. Like I thought this was just a

37:02

funny little bit. We're doing it

37:05

right now. In my house. You just

37:07

named three band-aid brands. Can I tell

37:09

you? What? In

37:11

my house, I have no shortage of cute band-aids.

37:13

I even have Bob Ross band-aids in this place

37:15

that I'm in. Ooh. Yeah, they're great.

37:17

Got some happy little dreams that you put on your

37:20

wounds. Yeah.

37:30

Welcome to another mid-roll from the Flaming

37:32

Tower of the OSN Studio. I don't

37:35

have to record in the Flaming Tower,

37:37

but I do prefer the warmth, especially

37:39

after I've had lunch. It helps me

37:41

digest. I'm going to quickly remind you

37:44

that the Ultimate RPG Game Master's Guide

37:46

is for sale now, and then Dungeon

37:48

Meister Random Monster Generator is up for

37:51

pre-order. As for me, Dylan,

37:53

you should absolutely catch me on RP

37:55

Geek's channel playing in a game of

37:57

Orbital Blues. We are...

38:00

about to air today the

38:02

third episode in a four

38:04

episode series and

38:06

I might have an ulterior motive related

38:08

to our next upcoming series here on

38:10

OneShot for asking you to check

38:13

this out but I'm not saying

38:15

that for sure I'm just saying

38:17

I might and we'll see. Um.

38:23

So we

38:28

are picked up in an

38:30

up draft? Oh

38:36

I think we have to maneuver. We gotta like

38:39

maneuver the parachute. I

38:45

feel. We have to roll for that

38:47

or have we succeeded enough?

38:50

I think I wasn't there wasn't there something that

38:52

uh that Ulysses was gonna do too or did

38:55

I make that up? No I was just

38:57

I was just grabbing everyone. We

38:59

have Eagle who's like a flight professional. Oh

39:01

Eagle this was like your moment. Yeah I

39:04

was gonna I was yeah I was gonna

39:06

say uh as

39:08

as we're starting to like Eagle's been quiet this

39:10

whole time though as as it's kind of like

39:12

in anticipation to be lifted up into the air

39:14

with all his best friends. Oh my god he's

39:17

flying. And as the wind

39:19

and the the as the

39:22

sail catches wind and the group starts

39:24

to levitate Eagle goes wait

39:27

wait wait wait I have I have the

39:29

perfect song to accompany this moment and

39:32

he rips off the headphones attached

39:34

to his uh music player

39:36

and he presses the button and

39:39

paper planes but MIA starts to

39:41

move out. Oh. Oh.

39:44

So rude. We're gonna

39:46

jump that over with something that

39:48

is Creative Commons. Oh

39:51

I can't even mention it. But

39:53

I'm kidding. That okay that's

39:55

just for awesome. I'm kidding I'm kidding. All

39:57

I want to do is come come come. But

40:01

you'd have two from there. And, um, and

40:04

yeah, the,

40:06

uh, uh, he

40:08

will, he will call to his, his pigeon

40:10

friends to help maneuver so

40:13

that, uh, hell yeah. That way it

40:15

will ease any, I almost did the

40:17

voice. It will ease any sort of,

40:20

um, attempts that we have to

40:23

come back to this punching cyclone. Hell

40:25

yeah. Hell yeah, brother. I'm

40:28

rolling. Five, four, and three

40:32

threes. Nice. And

40:35

your second or third? I'm a, no, I'm a

40:37

third class. Okay.

40:40

But that's still, that's all successes. All successes. Yeah.

40:43

Oh, sweet. Oh yeah. Hell

40:46

yeah. Yeah. So we, we start

40:48

like, we start, uh, levitating and then the pigeons come in

40:50

and they, uh, grab pieces

40:52

of the string and they start

40:55

maneuvering past debris and water and

40:57

updrafts. And in

40:59

the, uh, all the meanwhile, the cyclone is starting to

41:01

like just shuck in punches and

41:03

we're, we're dodging them. Um,

41:05

Frank in the middle starts

41:07

yelling obscenities over at

41:09

USB, just

41:12

calling you out for having no,

41:14

no skill. Uh, he's, he's actually

41:17

accusing you of, uh, of, of

41:19

wall hacks. Oh my

41:21

God. That the Fortnite

41:23

victory that you achieved that eventually led

41:25

to a, uh, a, a passion that

41:28

you've never thought of. That's a low blow. No

41:30

pun intended. Did you flip it there, mom? Based on a

41:32

lie? That's cheap. Not cool,

41:34

man. Listen, he might. Wait, why

41:37

are you all studying? What is funny? If it's true,

41:39

it would be pretty fucking

41:41

crazy if it was true. It's

41:44

not true. Not, not at all. No, I'm

41:47

a, like, uh, I'm a, I'm a third class.

41:49

I'm a third class. I'm a third class. I'm

41:51

a third class. I'm a third class. I'm a

41:53

third class. I'm a third class. I'm a third

41:55

class. I'm a, like, uh, I'm

41:58

a, I'm a real good Fortnite player. And

42:00

hey, listen, even if it was fake,

42:05

he can, you know, he

42:08

can try and devallidate my win, but

42:10

he'll never devallidate the fact that I've

42:13

thought both of his marks. It

42:15

doesn't matter. Robin,

42:19

are you afraid that you might get cancelled for this

42:21

episode? Our

42:24

last episode was called Slut

42:27

City the Musical, I think

42:29

I'm safe. Yeah, absolutely incredible.

42:33

Yeah, fantastic. Shit, God,

42:35

that's funny. I think, so

42:37

what's the plan? I think I lost

42:39

track of what the plan is so far. We're not

42:42

trying to punch this guy in the face. Yeah,

42:44

we're getting even close. We're just like trying to,

42:46

yeah, find an opening. It sounds like he's calling you

42:48

a F.B. out, though. Yeah,

42:52

USBA, I think you got to punch him. You

42:54

all made a punch him? I mean, is your power

42:56

to stick it right every time? Because technically this is

42:58

sticking it. That's true,

43:00

I could stick it right to him. Just one.

43:02

Just the first time. Better make it count. When

43:04

does that cover all punches that USBA has ever

43:07

done? Or is it like... I think

43:09

it's when it activated, when

43:11

like the power starts, then

43:14

it's the first time I do it after. Oh,

43:17

that's convenient. It

43:21

refreshes. Fuck you, really? Oh, it doesn't.

43:23

Holy crap. I have to

43:25

hit it. But

43:30

I will still say, this is the

43:32

first time I've tried to punch this

43:34

guy, was in a flying mech, was

43:36

he in a kaiju, so I've seen

43:38

you count. I

43:42

think I'm still going to get this one, actually. Oh

43:49

my god, we're in the drift. We're in the drift

43:51

so deep. I think what's going to happen to, after

43:53

you punch him, supposes

43:56

that you do it correctly. I will

43:58

try to do an extra... extra move.

44:00

An extra little move. Yeah. So we

44:02

are in the trap. This is Pacific

44:05

Rim. That's as

44:07

much as I can do with that game.

44:09

Um, starts playing as we,

44:11

as I go to, I got a one or two

44:15

and a four. That

44:19

is what one success. That's

44:21

one success. I think I'm too much in my

44:24

own head. Yeah. About the fact that my team

44:26

has just turned against me. How we supposed to

44:28

get number one victory Royal if I've got no

44:30

squad backing. Sure you've got a lot of criticism.

44:34

What do you mean? Is your team holding you accountable?

44:36

And I, and you and the

44:41

team emotionally cannot handle it. Oh, that's right.

44:43

That's right. He is a gamer. Yeah.

44:49

I think like go through this

44:52

punch and like the pigeons get

44:54

us close. You have the opening

44:57

to just everything. Perfect. But

45:00

the punch sucks. I like throw it and

45:02

I just like my wrist just bends really

45:04

wrong again. Like as,

45:07

as I go to punch him, it's

45:09

like a clean shot in the face and then like

45:11

one piece of like driftwood fly past and then crack

45:14

it on my wrist. But you break your

45:16

hand. Yeah. Fuck it. I

45:19

break my heart. Break

45:21

that hand. Yeah. Not the

45:23

fan. And I, I get

45:25

exact. That's the thing just about. Oh, no,

45:27

not the, not the

45:29

Eastport. Yeah. So they use

45:31

it for that, right? Yeah. So I throw you

45:34

the beans. Are you

45:47

going to, are you going to drink the bean juice? We do.

45:49

I'm obviously going to try and drink the

45:51

beans. All right. All right. Maybe

45:53

we got three

45:55

successes. Oh,

45:57

delicious. And then I guess I I

46:00

guess I grab it and then I crush

46:02

it, crush the can and then again like

46:04

Popeye, all the beans shoot out of the

46:06

can and go down into my gullet. Yeah.

46:09

And I grow muscles for the first

46:11

time. Yeah. I'm a weirdly pissy

46:13

little guy but now I've just grown Popeye-esque muscles. You

46:15

didn't say yet. I don't

46:17

want to take up two rolls in a

46:19

row but I think, you

46:22

know, I think I grow, instead of taking two

46:24

rolls in a row, I think I grow the

46:26

muscles but in this like, in these

46:28

animation eye frames of

46:31

me like getting this superpower.

46:34

Frankie I think sees an opening and

46:39

kind of grabs Ulysses and

46:41

then picks him up really high in the

46:43

air to like slam the whole team down

46:45

since we're all like perfectly connected. Oh yeah.

46:48

We're all flying down to be slammed on

46:50

the ground because of this Kaiju. So

46:52

I'm ready for another punch and

46:55

I can but he's like fully

46:57

grabbed my body. Oh he's grabble.

46:59

Can we, can Flossy

47:01

Fouts maybe reinforce us because

47:04

we're being flung around right now. I

47:06

feel like, I feel like we need

47:09

more stability. I absolutely can.

47:14

You take out some bandages little airplanes on for

47:16

extra. Yeah.

47:19

Oh nice. Nice. No

47:21

she cannot. Eagles of the fan. No.

47:24

No. No. I

47:26

think we're going to have one's, a two, a three and a four. Oh

47:30

shit. Dang. Well

47:33

that four is still a success, isn't

47:35

it? A four is one success I

47:37

believe. Alright alright alright

47:39

so we gotta give you something. What

47:44

do you think? What do you think Robin? Well I

47:47

was thinking we like, this

47:50

should be like the end of us. We

47:52

are all getting slammed to the ground. Yeah.

48:00

Just before we hit the ground Flossy's like

48:03

did detaches all

48:06

of the like the band-aids that are holding

48:08

us real tight together and then forms like

48:10

a small trampoline so the mech that we've

48:12

built Like kind

48:14

of bursts apart, but we are all

48:17

still alive Like

48:19

last minute like Parachute

48:23

works cuz I rolled really well on that

48:25

so we definitely can be safe. Oh, there

48:27

you go Yeah, there it is. I

48:29

was just saving just now to

48:32

be able to kind of like reinforce

48:34

us Yeah

48:37

Yeah, maybe it's like the parachute

48:39

saves the day. I feel so bad the

48:41

parachute. Yeah Yeah, absolutely

48:45

Yeah, we all like hit the

48:47

ground pretty hard But the parachute was able

48:49

to like slow our descent so we don't

48:51

yeah completely beef it I think when she hits

48:53

the ground she's like really embarrassed their

48:55

faces It's turning like a

48:58

like a deep blush like around like the

49:00

cheek and chin area Mm-hmm, and

49:02

they're like looking off to the

49:04

side. They're very embarrassed that they're beautiful idea

49:06

did not work Slams

49:10

the ground real hard with this bit is now

49:12

very muscly fist And

49:15

is that you know what it's just like on all fours like

49:18

like Like this kind

49:20

of like pounding the ground very

49:23

Upset thinking that we've lost USB

49:25

is destroyed. Don't

49:28

worry about it, and I'm gonna And

49:34

I'm gonna sprinkle some beans into the ground right

49:36

at our feet and I'm

49:38

gonna roll before I Say

49:42

how this is how I feel like okay? I

49:47

Think you know what happened. Yeah, I pulled this

49:49

shit with my game masters all the fucking time where

49:52

I'm like I do this thing and I do

49:54

this thing and then wait Let me roll because I have to

49:56

roll before I say the cool thing I want to

49:58

do Really embarrassing if I described the whole whole

50:00

thing and then I roll fucking clown shoes.

50:02

Exactly. But that

50:04

is going to be a success. That's four

50:06

successes. One was a six. So

50:08

I'm back up to five dice. I am almost the first.

50:11

Yes. Beautiful beans.

50:14

I sprinkle the

50:16

beans into the ground. A rumbling

50:18

occurs under feet as

50:21

a giant beanstalk emerges

50:24

from the ground, lifting

50:26

us all within its branches

50:28

to the exact perfect punching

50:30

height of the kaidu. Beans,

50:34

can I take some of

50:36

the wires that I have acquired and

50:39

lasso Frankie to try and like

50:44

pull them closer? Do you get us right up

50:46

on them? Yeah. Okay.

50:49

Lasso. Delicious. Lasso

50:51

that boy. Lasso the boy. All

50:53

right. Here we go. Fuck

50:55

you, Frankie. Fuck up. Okay.

50:59

Well, I mean, it's not bad. It's a four,

51:01

a four and a five. That's pretty good. So

51:03

that's all successes. That's all successes. That's all

51:05

successes. You're really not bad at that. Hell

51:07

yeah. Someone tell me

51:09

how bad I beat his how

51:11

good I put someone. I think

51:14

what you do is all success, right? You

51:19

very quickly fashion together all these wires and

51:21

cables and everything. And there's no way this

51:24

works, but you defy all odds. You

51:27

chuck your lasso hundreds of yards

51:29

into this light cyclone and grab

51:32

Frank by the waist, pull

51:34

him in and start the

51:37

rounds. Like, I don't know, pulling him, but then

51:39

he starts circling. I don't know what to call that.

51:42

But around around

51:44

and around and

51:47

consecutive with a piece of

51:49

debris, we can

51:51

hear and you yank him towards

51:54

him. He starts rushing in to

51:56

line up for the perfect punch

51:58

to be delivered by. I

52:01

need help somebody help

52:03

me pull this pull this guy

52:05

in I Cursed

52:07

too much in the first half and I'm trying to curse less In

52:10

the second half here in the second half. I've learned

52:12

I've grown Great

52:15

to hear Not

52:27

yell anymore so Actually,

52:30

hey if we need like If

52:34

people are lining up for like the perfect punch You

52:37

know like I know that you have

52:40

control over pigeons, but is there any way you could

52:42

get like a bigger bird to to

52:46

kind of distract them or Power

52:49

up your punch with their shot beaks and claws.

52:51

I never thought of

52:53

that a bigger bird a bigger

52:55

bird Big in pigeons with

52:58

that with the encouragement of USB

53:02

You see you see Eagle do like

53:04

the professor X thing As

53:10

the output a plea to all

53:13

of bird Kingdom the birds on

53:17

Domain expansion I'm

53:23

going to I'm going to roll before

53:25

the That's

53:33

really good to

53:35

sit this I move up to a second class

53:42

And I'm

53:45

gonna say all the

53:47

pigeons come in They

53:50

start they start Responding

53:52

to the message, but no bigger birds for some

53:54

reason and then as Eagle

53:58

opens his eyes hit

54:00

an aura of

54:03

wings. Sprouts from

54:05

his arms. The

54:09

abbot, the bird. Holy

54:12

shit. And he goes, the

54:18

great bird was inside me all along.

54:26

He grabs the last one, jumps off this

54:28

giant bean sock leaf to

54:31

basically dangle

54:34

Frankie around and just make

54:36

sure that he can't get control over the

54:38

situation. Oh, hell

54:40

yeah. Fauci,

54:44

USB, we gotta use our big

54:46

strong arms to punch the shit out of this

54:48

guy. I know how to do a

54:50

stunt farm. I curse again and I was trying to

54:52

not do that. I'm sorry. I'm getting

54:55

better. I know how to do stunt punches mostly.

54:57

So, if it really hurt, I could just

55:01

make it look good. Does that

55:04

count for anything? But

55:06

what if, Fauci, what if

55:09

you did the stunt punch

55:11

but then connected? You're blowing my

55:13

mind right now. It's like

55:16

30 centimeters closer. Yeah.

55:21

You're asking me to use

55:23

my powers for evil. No.

55:27

I don't even know this guy and he

55:36

sucks. You know, I think

55:38

we do need to take a moment and

55:41

give attention to what Fauci has just brought

55:43

up because USB, you did fuck his

55:45

moms. I didn't need to punch him

55:47

super hard

55:49

with an apology. That's

55:51

all, you know? So

55:53

insane. All loud

55:56

and clear and I set him up, dangle

55:58

him in front of you just in person. perfect

56:00

position for an apology as opposed

56:02

to a punch, which is

56:04

six inches to the left. Damn

56:09

it. Can I feed

56:11

you a spoonful of beans to

56:13

humble you? Of emotional beans? Yeah. Humble

56:16

pie? Now with more beans? Humble beans.

56:19

Humble beans. You'll feel humble after you've

56:21

eaten cold, bad beans. I'm taking a slice of

56:23

humble pie, but the pie is beans. It's

56:26

bean pie. And then you'll feel more equipped

56:28

to give an apology.

56:30

I think that's the good idea. Oh, humble personally. I'm going

56:33

to roll for it. Roll with the beans. Go on,

56:35

USB. That is five successes. It's not what your name

56:37

is. Now you have to leave. The beans fill

56:39

you with clarity. Clarity that you've never

56:41

had before. You

56:51

see all of the

56:53

ways that you've, all of

56:56

the things in life that you've done

56:58

right and all of the things that

57:00

you've done wrong sitting on a scale

57:02

against a feather. You

57:16

see all of the folds of your life

57:18

laid out and

57:20

know exactly what you have

57:22

to say to

57:25

make amends with Frankie.

57:28

For fucking his mom. Hey,

57:32

dude. I've never been

57:34

more sorry. I ain't got to say that. Straight up. No.

57:37

No. Hey, listen. I

57:44

understand that it was, it's not cool

57:46

for, it's not, it

57:48

wasn't cool of me to sleep with both of your moms after

57:50

I got that real sweet headshot. I

57:53

ended up winning number one victory

57:55

royale. But hey, listen. How

57:58

about. We

58:00

go back to mine, we get some pizza, and

58:02

maybe we play some duos. Just you and me.

58:04

We just, we just squawed

58:06

up, and we, uh... And

58:10

we just play Fortnite, until the sun

58:12

comes up, like the old days. I'll,

58:16

you know, delete both your moms from my

58:19

phone, and then I can't contact them again.

58:22

How about that? Can

58:24

we roll for Bean Poly? I

58:26

think you gotta, I think, I mean, you

58:29

gotta... You

58:31

got, you got a lot of heavy assists from the Bean,

58:33

uh, prophecy. But

58:35

I think you still have prophecy. Yeah.

58:39

5-5-6. Yeah, and then

58:41

you die. That's a solid apology. Can

58:45

I, can I have a solid apology? Can

58:47

I have a solid apology? Yes, please.

58:49

How about, take the wheel? There's

58:53

a mo- there's a beat. I

58:56

was gonna say bean, but... There's

58:59

a bean. There's

59:03

a bean in time, where the

59:05

cyclone appears to freeze.

59:09

The wind stops whipping, everything falls

59:11

silent for a quick second, and

59:14

Frankie looks down. You can't really see his

59:17

face. And then looks

59:19

up, tears streaming

59:22

down his face. I

59:24

can't remember Frank's, uh, Frank's voice, but

59:26

I'm just gonna... USB.

59:31

This is the real him. Pikes.

59:37

Whoever he was before. I

59:42

would love nothing more than to

59:45

join forces with my greatest

59:47

rival in Fortnite.

59:51

I think it's cool that you slept with my mom. Thank

59:56

you. If

1:00:00

you want, it

1:00:02

is. Hey, if

1:00:04

you want, you can sleep with my dad.

1:00:08

Gollum, Ian. Already

1:00:11

did. Yeah!

1:00:16

Hell yeah, brother. We both died. Bean

1:00:26

out? Bean out? I

1:00:31

think... Frame on

1:00:33

the handshake, everybody's smiling. It's

1:00:36

the thing from Predator where both of

1:00:38

us like... Oh, that's amazing. Yeah.

1:00:42

Here's the thing. Frankie

1:00:45

and Ulysses have made up,

1:00:47

and they're about to go play Fortnite, except

1:00:51

the Cyclone and the Kaiju

1:00:53

form are already in motion.

1:00:55

This is... Oh, shit. They're

1:00:57

already done, and there's now like... Oh,

1:01:00

no. An escalation going off, and now Frankie's

1:01:02

not even in the driver's seat. So

1:01:04

Frankie can't stop it

1:01:06

anymore. The storm and

1:01:08

Kaiju form are just

1:01:10

sort of wreaking havoc

1:01:12

now in like the

1:01:15

city behind you. Frankie,

1:01:17

this thing got so juiced up off

1:01:20

of all your bad vibes, and now it's like

1:01:22

unstoppable. We need to

1:01:24

counter the vibes. I don't

1:01:26

know how to do that. How do we stop it? How

1:01:28

do we stop bad vibes? I

1:01:32

mean, your election soon put me in such

1:01:34

a good mood earlier. I just don't... Like,

1:01:37

I feel like you could really cheer anyone up like

1:01:39

that, and then like I could give compliments. I'm really

1:01:42

good at like applying band-aids, and I feel like compliments

1:01:44

are like verbal band-aids, you know, because it's like a

1:01:46

stopgap for someone feeling like shit. Yes. And

1:01:49

if we got a speaker and we were able

1:01:51

to play it loud enough... I have a speaker.

1:01:53

Maybe we... Hell yeah. And

1:01:55

then we can maybe make it sound so the

1:01:58

whole cyclone can hear it, because the cyclone... really

1:02:00

loud so we would be sound

1:02:02

yeah yeah yeah louder than the cyclist oh my god

1:02:04

that's why it's like a five they can't

1:02:06

hear all the beautiful love that we've

1:02:08

been sharing between us yeah you

1:02:12

discovered the Frankie

1:02:16

Frankie when all this

1:02:18

is coming together Frankie's

1:02:33

like I think you you discovered the

1:02:35

secret combating bad vibes good

1:02:38

vibes long

1:02:40

vibes oh

1:02:42

shit fucking

1:02:45

and what do you need okay

1:02:49

everybody together

1:02:53

she's gonna

1:02:56

just like dude directions like go

1:02:58

get those wires give me some fucking

1:03:00

give me some electric bullshit from

1:03:02

over there and pigeons are picking

1:03:05

everything up and bringing them to you

1:03:07

I'm gonna I'm gonna gas power this

1:03:09

the speaker and

1:03:28

I let's see let's see what we got right now

1:03:30

that's a fuck everyone want to roll to

1:03:32

see how successful it is because it's like oh

1:03:35

yeah cuz Oona is the one who's playing

1:03:37

the thing Flossy

1:03:40

is being like is like being the

1:03:42

support rhythmic power pigeons are helping and

1:03:44

then also I've got to plug it

1:03:46

in right yeah

1:03:50

I am I'm a hero now

1:03:52

so nothing I do can fail

1:03:54

oh yeah damn yeah I got I got

1:03:56

two sixes and a five but I got

1:03:59

once two fours and a five. Oh

1:04:03

shit. I actually, I got, I rolled really badly. I

1:04:05

got a five and

1:04:07

then a two and a one. Oh

1:04:10

my God. So success. It's

1:04:12

one success. Yeah.

1:04:16

She's like, she's not like rocking

1:04:18

it, but she's like so,

1:04:21

she's a competent spoons player. She's like

1:04:23

pairing it up rhythmically. It's going so

1:04:25

hard, but like she's a little bit

1:04:28

lost her emotions. The performance is a

1:04:30

little lackluster because she's like, how

1:04:32

am I supposed to do this on my own? And

1:04:35

then Flossy comes up behind her and it's like,

1:04:37

I don't know,

1:04:39

Flossy, what's a compliment? Flossy would say. I

1:04:41

mean, do you need the compliment more than the

1:04:43

cyclone? Nah,

1:04:45

give it to the cyclone. You know,

1:04:47

I really admire how you just like

1:04:50

keep going no matter what. Like you

1:04:52

just are such a force of nature,

1:04:54

literally. And I really wish that

1:04:56

I could be like that. It's so hard

1:04:58

not to give up sometimes. And that's not

1:05:00

saying you should give up now. That's just

1:05:02

saying like maybe a timeout and some chill

1:05:04

time with your friends, I E S would

1:05:06

like make your day a lot better and

1:05:08

reinvigorate you for your next spin cycle. I

1:05:13

am going to go out on a limb. I

1:05:15

feel like this is one of

1:05:17

those moments where you're talking to

1:05:19

the cyclone, but all of us

1:05:21

are like internalizing that compliment to

1:05:24

our present day. Like, like

1:05:26

things like when a monologue happens

1:05:28

in Scrap. In

1:05:32

the anime, it's just like

1:05:34

flashing to everybody's faces. Yeah.

1:05:36

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Anime

1:05:39

sounds. And

1:05:48

the theme song from Scrubs is Superman. Who

1:05:50

does? Oh, my God. Come back and write.

1:05:54

Hell yeah. And then like, guess

1:05:57

help from Eagle and from

1:05:59

Ulysses. And

1:06:01

just like that those good feelings flood

1:06:03

her and she just like starts jamming

1:06:05

hard with her spoons nice

1:06:09

the The waves of

1:06:11

good vibes take over the team and

1:06:13

it starts to turn into the cave

1:06:15

dance From the matrix, but

1:06:18

it's just the six of us Oh

1:06:33

My god, I just re-watched the Matrix trilogy,

1:06:36

so that is such a timely reference for

1:06:38

me you're welcome The

1:06:43

the cyclone storm the

1:06:45

the face in the storm at

1:06:47

first goes from this Fury

1:06:49

this anger from being burst through

1:06:52

Frankie's bad vibes to confusion over

1:06:54

the monologue that that can is

1:06:56

provided and then Starts

1:06:58

to instead of instead of confusion now It's

1:07:00

curiosity at like the good vibes that's happening

1:07:02

in this park square at the

1:07:04

beach and slowly as the

1:07:06

storm Starts to understand good

1:07:09

vibes and being introduced to them starts

1:07:11

to settle down a little bit Keep

1:07:16

going we have to keep going until it's all

1:07:18

the way I Sprinkle

1:07:26

more beans The

1:07:31

vines start to wrap around the kaiju

1:07:33

and like it tangled up in the

1:07:36

storm and like start to like dissipate

1:07:38

all of The

1:07:40

like debris and

1:07:42

and slow its motion Yeah,

1:07:45

also I'm also Having

1:07:49

Eagle send out via carrier pigeon to all

1:07:51

the people in the town to come out

1:07:53

to this cave dance, but on the beach

1:07:56

Join in on them. Yeah Yeah,

1:08:05

that's two fives and a three so it happens and

1:08:07

people start coming out people start coming out of their

1:08:10

People coming out and their beach houses.

1:08:12

They all walk the life to enjoy

1:08:14

in the the this this beach cave

1:08:16

dance and Eventually

1:08:18

the storm starts that with the vines and

1:08:20

everything the storm starts to Diminish

1:08:24

in size and becomes this Cyclone

1:08:27

elemental that one that yeah, it's tiny. I

1:08:29

was in yeah In

1:08:34

five yeah this beam this

1:08:36

beam IV bird My

1:08:49

god, it's like elements of all of us

1:08:51

all kind of like combined into one tiny

1:08:54

elemental What

1:08:59

Was it like not or just like our kid

1:09:01

or whatever? Oh, yeah. Yeah sure for sure. Yeah

1:09:03

that one. Yeah that one. Yeah Look

1:09:06

look at him. He's so chill Such

1:09:10

a good little guy and hey

1:09:12

I was I was super nervous

1:09:14

about how good I was be as

1:09:16

a parent But I think the first time I think

1:09:19

I'll do pretty good I

1:09:26

mean we We

1:09:29

high five right there Credit

1:09:36

cuts with like freeze frames of all of

1:09:38

us like in five

1:09:40

years this person went to this place Yeah,

1:09:43

I think it's like you went to the University

1:09:45

of eSports Mine

1:09:48

for mine for toot is that

1:09:50

ten minutes after this fight? To

1:09:53

and it's just like an image of

1:09:55

toot cutting up the vines into like

1:09:58

a big bowl with the leftover beans

1:10:00

and is making their bean

1:10:02

salad. Bean

1:10:05

salad. Yummy, yummy. I

1:10:08

think baby cyclone goes to trade school. Yeah. It

1:10:20

cuts to Eagle. Eagle, and

1:10:22

the caption reads, Eagle achieved his

1:10:25

dream of flight and cares for pigeons

1:10:27

all across the world. Oh,

1:10:30

beautiful. I think

1:10:32

Flossy's is like her,

1:10:34

just like a free frame of her like

1:10:36

mid-air on a BMX bike, applying

1:10:39

like an array of bandages to

1:10:41

like people that are doing stunts

1:10:44

in the sky so they don't have to land.

1:10:46

They have like a really specialized craft that they

1:10:48

do now. A

1:10:50

medic. A stunt medic right there. A stunt medic.

1:10:52

Not a medic. Correct.

1:10:55

Not a medic for stunts. That's included. Correct.

1:10:57

Yeah. A medic who does stunts at the

1:10:59

same time at the medicating end. They get

1:11:01

a lot of work. Yeah. Wow.

1:11:05

And Una builds

1:11:08

a laser and tragically

1:11:10

dies. Trying to build a laser to

1:11:12

cut the rubber band ball. But

1:11:20

she died happy. She died

1:11:22

so thrilled. She died doing what she loved. She died

1:11:24

doing what she loved, making a fucking

1:11:26

U-flaser. A seven person c-bolly.

1:11:28

She, she died covered in

1:11:30

wires. Cutting wires. By God. I

1:11:33

could have asked for anything else. Damn

1:11:35

it. Because I was also going

1:11:38

to say that in like, like

1:11:41

Frankie and Ulysses became best friends, but after

1:11:43

one year, Frankie kills Ulysses. So I don't

1:11:45

think we can have both of us die.

1:11:49

We will remember you.

1:11:57

So I think they both become esports champions.

1:12:00

only in duos. They get married. Yeah.

1:12:02

They get married. Do they leave the

1:12:04

polycule or do they get married?

1:12:06

No, we're still in the polycule. That's fine.

1:12:08

We get married and stay in the polycule.

1:12:11

It's actually because they get qualified for the

1:12:13

marriage tournament in Fortnite. Frankie gets married to

1:12:15

Ulysses' dad and joins that

1:12:17

polycule. And Ulysses

1:12:19

gets married to Frankie's mum and

1:12:22

joins that polycule. And

1:12:24

then we merge it with this

1:12:26

one. So it's like a clueless situation.

1:12:28

Yeah, it's a very much clueless situation.

1:12:31

It's exactly the same. Risk it for the

1:12:33

rut. Risk it for the rut, baby. We

1:12:38

all rut. Oh, wow. That has been...

1:12:46

That is all of that. That is what it

1:12:48

is. That

1:12:53

has been a dream. Ryan, are you glad we played

1:12:55

your game? Yeah, are you glad? Are you

1:12:57

so glad? Thank you so much, Ryan,

1:12:59

for meeting with me. I

1:13:02

hope I've done you proud. So I just want

1:13:04

to take another minute and just let everybody reintroduce

1:13:06

themselves to you and tell you all the amazing

1:13:08

things about them. There's a lot to say. I

1:13:12

say let's start with Candice. Candice, tell the heroes

1:13:14

out there who you are and where they can

1:13:16

find you. Hello, everyone. My name is Candice the

1:13:18

Magnificent. My pronouns are they she. You

1:13:20

can find me on Twitter and Blue Sky at

1:13:22

the Candice Marie and at Candice Magnificent

1:13:24

everywhere else. I'm a video actor,

1:13:27

TTRPG performer, writer, and sensitivity consultant

1:13:29

available for all your weird ass

1:13:31

needs. Get at me. Oh,

1:13:34

neat. Hell yeah, half-need.

1:13:36

Oh, Kristy, Hugo. Hi,

1:13:39

everyone. My name is Kappa. Christian

1:13:41

is OK, too. You

1:13:43

can find me on the internet at the Kappa Chris, mostly

1:13:46

on Twitter, maybe Blue Sky sometimes. And

1:13:49

I am a TTRPG performer, producer and writer

1:13:52

now. So to keep up with all the

1:13:54

stuff that I'm in, you can follow me

1:13:56

on the internet. Hell yeah. Bye. I

1:14:00

mean, it's all. Don't do that in

1:14:02

real life. I mean, I've been in fun with people.

1:14:04

Thank you so much for listening. I'm

1:14:10

Robin Kettacrill, and all things

1:14:12

pronounced, they, he, I

1:14:15

primarily GM the Adam-less, as well

1:14:18

as with this whole crew,

1:14:20

we have a show called Frequencies, which

1:14:22

is our little horror show. Yeah.

1:14:25

When will that be out? By the time you're

1:14:27

listening to this, maybe not yet.

1:14:31

We'll figure it out. But

1:14:33

it's coming that you're coming. Oh,

1:14:36

it's coming, baby. The

1:14:38

vibes could not be more different. Oh

1:14:40

my God. Yeah. It could not

1:14:43

be more different. Kind of the same. Yeah. Kind

1:14:45

of the same at the same time, really. Weirdly, yeah. The part that

1:14:47

you don't get to listen to, the green room, is

1:14:49

almost identical. Yeah, it's exactly the same. And

1:14:52

then, phone. Yeah,

1:14:55

hi, hi. Yeah, hi, hello. I

1:14:57

know I did a bit at the beginning of this where I was like,

1:14:59

you can't find me. I'm not going to do

1:15:02

that anymore because I figured you stayed for the whole time, so you

1:15:04

deserve to know. But hi, hello,

1:15:06

my name is Sloan. My pronouns are

1:15:08

they them. My handle is artpleave. That's

1:15:10

A-R-T-P-L-E-B-E. Pretty much everywhere, except

1:15:13

for Instagram, where it's art.pleave. You can

1:15:15

find me on most platforms. I

1:15:18

currently work in affordable housing and disaster

1:15:20

relief, but I also do

1:15:22

tabletop stuff, including protection, and from time to time,

1:15:24

I do a podcast. And

1:15:27

I also stream. That's me. That's

1:15:29

me. Everyone's outros

1:15:32

are so nice. I like it. You would? What?

1:15:35

I like everyone's outros. I mean, all at everyone's outros.

1:15:37

That's so good. Hey, Puff, y'all. And

1:15:40

you know who I am because I

1:15:42

live here. All right, we'll

1:15:44

see you next week here. Wait, I

1:15:46

forgot to DM for the last part.

1:15:49

The podcast is no longer in my

1:15:51

heart. Oh, no. I

1:15:53

love it again. I love it again. This

1:15:56

is my show. Next

1:16:00

time, we'll get it next time. Yeah, we'll

1:16:02

get it next time. I'm coming to

1:16:05

play that game twice in a row. Coming

1:16:07

for your fucking gamer chair. Dylan.

1:16:11

Coming for your taped up head boom. I knew it was

1:16:13

coming back around. I knew it. Ooh

1:16:18

boy. Okay. Pyromaniac

1:16:49

by Ghostbeats. Chloridase

1:16:52

by Lindo. And Road

1:16:54

to You by Palma. This

1:16:56

episode of One Shot was edited and found designed by Tracy

1:16:58

Bernadette. Find more of their

1:17:01

work online anywhere at The Other Tracy. Thank

1:17:10

you so much for tuning in, Heroes. I really

1:17:12

hope you've enjoyed the show, and I hope you

1:17:14

check out more from Ryan from his itch link

1:17:16

in the show notes if you have not already.

1:17:19

And we will see you next week with a

1:17:21

brand new game featuring a brand new cast of

1:17:23

players, neither of which

1:17:25

I've hinted to at all. See

1:17:28

you next week. It'll be a total

1:17:30

surprise. Can't wait. As

1:17:32

always, thank you to the wonderfully generous people who

1:17:34

support One Shot on Patreon. But

1:17:37

if you want to support the show in a

1:17:39

non-monetary way, it is as simple as just talking

1:17:41

about the show. Tell your

1:17:43

friends about the show, rate, or leave a review,

1:17:46

or tag us on socials and tell us

1:17:48

your thoughts. For updates and

1:17:50

One Shot news, please follow

1:17:52

me on Twitter, Instagram, or

1:17:55

TikTok at Superdylan, that's S-U-P-E-R-D-I-L-L-I-N,

1:17:58

or check for updates on our website. at

1:18:01

oneshotpodcast.com. For information

1:18:03

about ad rates, live

1:18:05

appearances, commissioning episodes, or

1:18:07

a general comment, please

1:18:09

message me at dylanatoneshotpodcast.com.

1:18:11

Again, that's D-I-L-L-I-N. Finally,

1:18:14

the music creeping up behind me

1:18:16

is Adventure by Be Your Own

1:18:18

Pet, courtesy of Infinity Cap Records.

1:18:20

I can't wait to have you

1:18:22

back for our next adventure, heroes!

1:18:26

In the universe of Starwall Odyssey,

1:18:28

space is made out of the

1:18:30

collective imaginations of all the thinking

1:18:33

beings who live on various planets.

1:18:35

These worlds are connected to each

1:18:37

other through imagination. Common themes and

1:18:39

ideas are strings between universes. And

1:18:41

to get between them, people fly

1:18:44

wooden ships that look like animals, which

1:18:46

are powered by emotions. Also,

1:18:48

people communicate with each other by contemplating

1:18:51

orbs. The only way you can take

1:18:53

pictures is getting stared at by a

1:18:55

big psychic bug, and people have already

1:18:57

declared victory in a war over the

1:18:59

very concept of evil. But I'm getting

1:19:02

ahead of myself. Starwall Odyssey follows the

1:19:04

adventures of the hapless inhabitants of the

1:19:06

Lucky Finn tenement building, who suddenly find

1:19:08

that their apartment is actually a spaceship,

1:19:10

and that they're lost in a sea

1:19:13

of boundless imaginations. It's an actual play

1:19:15

starring me, James Damato, Mel Damato,

1:19:17

Allie Grower, and Drew Merzieski as

1:19:19

we playtest the No King System,

1:19:21

which will hopefully one day be

1:19:23

the Skyjax role-playing systems. It toes

1:19:26

the line between weird and wonderful

1:19:28

slice of life and high-flying space

1:19:30

fantasy. You can sample the first

1:19:32

five episodes by searching for Starwall

1:19:34

Odyssey on your favorite podcast app,

1:19:36

or get the whole thing by

1:19:39

heading to patreon.com/one-shot podcast and signing

1:19:41

up for five dollars a month

1:19:43

or more.