0:00

Hello and welcome to the Eurogamer newscast

0:02

and this week we're discussing the biggest

0:05

Xbox League in history. We're looking ahead

0:07

to the Switch 2's potential launch lineup.

0:09

We're asking why there are so many

0:11

industry layoffs. Or at least

0:13

that's what I would be saying. If you're

0:15

listening to the Eurogamer newscast, hello I'm Tom,

0:17

Eurogamer's editor and host of our weekly discussion

0:19

podcast where we break down the biggest gaming

0:21

news stories and share insight from our

0:23

news reporting team. Head to your

0:26

favourite podcast app now to listen to

0:28

Search Eurogamer Newscast. When

0:59

the mysterious arrival of a celebrity from the Heroes

1:01

and Adventurers Guild sets off a strange conspiracy, the

1:03

group will have to leave what they think they

1:05

know about the world at the door, if

1:07

they're ever to unravel the truth at the

1:09

heart of this seemingly nondescript town. It's not

1:12

front page of the Sarsai star noob. I

1:14

pull up the today's instalment of the

1:16

news to see what the front page actually is. There's

1:19

a big picture of a pumpkin

1:21

that's been stepped on and it

1:23

says Outrage as Pumpkin Stepped On.

1:26

Storybreaker season 1 in its entirety is

1:28

available for listening right now wherever you

1:31

get your podcasts. With season 2 on

1:33

the way, find out more at dicebreaker.com.

1:36

Hello and welcome to the OxVenture D&D

1:38

podcast. It's back. And

1:41

it's better than ever this week we're listening to Blades in

1:43

the Dark. Oh wait, let me go again, sorry. Hello

1:48

and welcome to the OxVenture D&D podcast. It

1:50

is a Dungeons and Dragons podcast and sometimes

1:52

it's about other tabletop role playing games too.

1:55

I'm Jane. I'm your host. Here's

1:57

Andy. Hello, I'm Andy. Also your

1:59

host. Welcome to this podcast!

2:01

Regular fixture in the hobbies

2:03

unless it shots on his

2:05

apple podcasts? Yeah! great. Get

2:08

the here! Welcome back where weekly we

2:10

remain weekly. We get a keep on

2:12

going truck in three places a duck

2:14

season t this week listening to episode

2:17

To The Death of Cornelius. accept. Yes,

2:19

this is you episode. And

2:21

one episode all the i want to

2:23

treat me Johnny Luke obviously being a

2:25

storyteller a Gm good memories I I

2:27

went and looks at the some nail

2:30

hands and videos with a video you

2:32

can see the original the get you

2:34

can see eg.com Sochaux Sensor which is

2:36

West Am all our accent set videos

2:38

of or two episodes live and I'm

2:40

wearing a sort of black tactile neck

2:42

like a tactical turtleneck yeah and a

2:44

soda shoulder holster looking says as he

2:47

just a set of leather braces but

2:49

it looks a bit like I'm wearing

2:51

a cool. And hey, I'm Suzie Steampunk

2:53

shoulder holster with the North when I was like

2:55

if he bought it from some kind of specialists

2:57

website or if it was like a backpack. To.

3:00

And. It's just another backpack.

3:02

Yeah, no, it's a pair of

3:04

his opponent braces the attached to

3:07

a kind of belts. yeah, and

3:09

that the bell isn't the tax

3:11

twenty trousers. So it's all purely

3:13

for. The show again did

3:15

you buy from a specialist? I did

3:17

were very specialists. Website and when it arrived

3:19

at had little skills on it's I did

3:21

not anticipate but it will it'll fit. Supposedly

3:24

somebody disagrees attitude. Beaming snow don't

3:26

have the packaging the actual the lever

3:28

right that of the braces on the

3:30

and the boys to belt has instead

3:32

of having normal little studs the said

3:34

the like tiny cells. Say okay Magnus?

3:37

Yeah, I'm so me about your mental

3:39

health clubs. All. The little have

3:41

gloves yeah that's the like single as close

3:43

except they they also right very high on

3:45

the back of your hand to their like

3:48

a single is driving love Wait until I

3:50

think of fingerless anyway. Ah, Night

3:52

micro nice what which I ball with

3:54

my boys of my boy mikey Paris

3:56

driving without a toss out in the

3:58

in the sort of. The area though in

4:00

the back to the had that. I see

4:03

yeah with a clown social. Okay,

4:05

we'll minor like that, but without fingers

4:07

again serving as a very close messy

4:10

only purpose because they neither protect my

4:12

fingers or. Blood. Parts my

4:14

hands. Or they would protect your knuckles. The punching.

4:17

You know that? See that is. Say yes.

4:20

Then. I think if I if

4:22

we were to revisit Blades in the.do a three, maybe

4:24

it's time to invest in like a knuckle duster. Or

4:26

something. yeah he likes that would be

4:29

the way to go. Yeah had bought

4:31

his dislike most of nice jackets which.

4:34

Is great I mean from in the

4:36

set ablaze and says stuck it in

4:38

waistcoats jackets have a mustache. The rules

4:40

Israel Fum. From. To misinform the

4:42

character and phone The Carrots. A Yeah,

4:45

it's not just a reset. We can buy nice

4:47

accessories. Her. Old. I was shopping

4:49

other day and I saw a clutch

4:51

handbags that instead of having a sort

4:53

of a class and a handled see

4:55

a data combined cost handle that looks

4:57

like a knuckle duster made of like

4:59

bejeweled. Rings woman can you imagine can even

5:01

imagine said on even imagine. So. It's

5:03

like Zola went to the ball. That would be a hand

5:05

when. I had knuckles or for the clutch

5:07

handbag on earth? Amazing or have you Boson.

5:10

No. I didn't He was very,

5:12

very expensive. So right Sir Lady.

5:14

fine. Maybe

5:16

when we are high enough. Linked.

5:19

Yeah yeah well we get home. Background.

5:21

Pause in the upcoming Blaze and the Dog

5:24

Tv says oh. Die know that still a

5:26

thing isn't happening is happening. I.

5:28

Wonder how close to happening is and

5:30

whether. Whether we going to be

5:32

in the most express death. And.

5:35

We they would. They didn't put critical role

5:37

in the background of the the indie movie.

5:39

I doubt the good for us in the

5:41

background of a blaze little well maybe maybe

5:43

to say. We

5:45

I'm going to manifest it into

5:48

into reality. Or it sounds

5:50

good. The visualize: And believe And

5:52

and I'm going to visualize month or so

5:54

hot it's going to counterbalance you. have. Your

5:57

lack of. Ah,

6:00

The going Dana see you have a

6:02

am extremely nice looking said. Oh

6:04

thank you! yeah day I got a new

6:06

desk chair. It's I'm. Extremely comfortable yes, some

6:08

yet. Look at the chameleon all the way all

6:10

the way back in it and on see if

6:12

I was. Looks very stylish the sort of thing

6:14

and hum, Imagine a moon base

6:17

in the nineteen seventies. That's.

6:19

The kind of vibe. Yeah. The furniture

6:21

from that yesterday so ret tracy

6:23

tourists stuff. Is a sort of

6:25

them it. It's somewhat looks like an

6:28

Eames chair as anyone is Somalia with

6:30

that sort of design. But yeah, that

6:32

midcentury modern. I should get a new chair

6:34

for not for nothing more than the fact the

6:36

mine does This. Whenever I

6:39

move Sundays Ruff terribly met up on

6:41

the My Santa. I see you at your

6:43

software is is filtering out the same a

6:45

new is so I said maybe maybe the

6:47

audience will or will not be of the

6:49

his Us on this desk comparison put cost

6:51

us tech comparison. Put garcia for we are now.

6:54

I. Just wanted C S Credits Johnny for

6:56

the purchase of my the sad because study

6:58

recommended me this very chair. They have the

7:00

exact same one so if you have to

7:02

what's truly. Ugly screaming at

7:04

you tube.com/stony Tdd You might well

7:07

see this very chair in one

7:09

as that's minutes. A painting streams.

7:11

So. Said. Into have to put that

7:13

we messed up with a link to the said.

7:15

Now in the his know there's no commission with

7:17

again or I'm getting some thanks for the chairman

7:20

of actor and say hey everyone's been asking us

7:22

where they get the sense. Yeah, I tell

7:24

you what. What you cross a C though

7:26

is like a continuing my midcentury modern. So

7:28

seventy sixty five I got given this which

7:30

is a lava lamp. the Christmas. The only

7:32

number i can s and in thing they still made

7:34

lava lamps. They. Do there is a net

7:36

Better than ever Say he was. It was really

7:39

see. My parents got me a love lab the

7:41

Christmas and I remember being like a teenager and

7:43

really one to one but for some reason they

7:45

were really expensive Cities like they were traditionally will

7:48

have. I mean maybe they just seemed expenses to

7:50

me as a as a young preteen. plus I'm

7:52

say yes. but anyway now I have a lava

7:54

lamp my very own and he looks. In

7:56

explorers and warm of an evening.

8:00

Yeah, the retro futuristic. I have a strong. In

8:02

your office run and ah ah. Ah,

8:04

Has you week. Ah, Yes, Sign

8:06

it. So it's so cold here and

8:09

it's the sort of the worst possible

8:11

time of year. Or my

8:13

early January. Just. Nothing

8:15

fun or interesting saddening, so I'm just sort

8:17

of right in a single adults. This is

8:19

what fuel to the fire that my best a month is

8:21

a terrible months to have a best then. Why didn't

8:24

specifically oil? I mean things happening I mean

8:26

no I that we went to Karaoke for

8:28

your best that was yeah yeah yeah yeah.

8:30

was the one hype now with one high

8:32

point yeah yeah yeah but a behold I

8:34

agree and and you I can see you're

8:36

wearing your with the tribes certain were yelling

8:38

it's a necessity in the Eu de but

8:40

it's got to like a sort of wizards

8:42

am hood. Yeah. Piece on

8:44

it so I can look Always Italy

8:46

and damn I'm playing an Rpg that

8:48

is as yet unreleased so can't say

8:50

what it is but some sort of

8:53

these kind of hundred our Rpgs. Oh

8:55

a video game rpg no se is able

8:58

some kind as a sort of hundred yen

9:00

to scale up in a large wearable blankets.

9:02

Play. Video games mostly. On the

9:04

thoughtfully here now. I that's how I did enter.

9:07

Yesterday we sell some Accent City and

9:09

D with special guests from Narrow Spot

9:11

and I cannot wait everybody to see

9:14

that it's not part of like the

9:16

usual run of episodes. It's not like

9:18

a main season saying is kind of

9:20

a spin off experimental things and it

9:22

was very very sun and I'm pleased

9:24

that for to that yes it's as

9:27

easy to concept censure but no doubt

9:29

it will also make it's way eventually

9:31

on t tes this podcast. Anointed.

9:34

Undies? Nothing. It's. Which is I wasn't

9:36

invited. Andy, you won't

9:38

with. Now. You

9:40

went under his list. We deliberately told Andy

9:43

the wrong location to say he turned up

9:45

to the wrong Cd. I was whether you

9:47

are filming it in Paris but you know

9:49

what's on the Eurostar with my bags. Ready

9:52

to play Sunday, they. Get turned off

9:54

outside the Pompidou Center. And by

9:57

the time you got that, we'd already done it, already, Played

9:59

the game and that bad. Home I haven't I

10:01

have a very as a very cool

10:03

central mechanic cam that's Luke Devised. And

10:06

Luke Israel is running the game so am I.

10:08

Having not been a part of it, I am

10:10

very excited to see. How. It goes

10:12

myself as well said I will be experiencing along with all

10:15

of you when it gets released. In

10:17

here, somewhere else is on your plate this week. I'm

10:20

more tired and nothing

10:23

really. Like. Just

10:25

writing. Scripts. And the editing

10:27

videos. You know, the usual stuff

10:29

like as a January apart from

10:31

your birthday. ah. Says and.

10:33

Might. Get that

10:36

about unless you think. Of unless you

10:38

saying this way, this will say oh

10:40

wait, no money guys In February Valentine's

10:42

Day February. Yes, Chinese New Year is

10:44

February right? Yes all the gets. This

10:47

center is literally the was onto the

10:49

ah okay I can is a cold.

10:52

To. See the taxes. Is

10:54

nothing going on? And spam

10:56

on dinner. or I ran. I

10:58

hereby surrender my january by saying. In a

11:00

trade it it's is a stand to smell telling people you

11:02

have a December thing. Is I read that

11:04

like. About someone's grandma they had

11:06

they were like clearing out some of her stuff

11:09

and they sound other her birthday was actually a

11:11

completely different day since he was my whole yeah

11:13

but ever I'm known wanted to party of that

11:15

date so I have since I just told them

11:18

either soulless yeah mid summer this like nothing stopping

11:20

you. Doesn't. Literally nothing. So for me

11:22

some during that. Changing the a plan yeah

11:24

is be like oh it's like the middle of

11:26

June. Oh I do I tell

11:29

you, why did they Speaking of January

11:31

and it being very cold, I went

11:33

for soup dumplings at the weekend. yeah,

11:35

after a restaurant in Central London and

11:37

didn't I phone actually Atlanta. I like

11:39

them under I'm Get a Business and

11:41

I had some really, really excellent soup

11:43

dumplings and they was so hot. So

11:46

scalding hot. And that was the. Appropriate

11:48

temperature subzero temperatures in London and

11:50

I see dumplings was like the

11:52

hardest things ui because. You.

11:55

Only them straight away with I did Liquid

11:57

inside is. Boiling. scalding

11:59

hot yet appropriate temperature. I have

12:02

extremely high tolerance for high temperatures. Yeah,

12:04

but you can't eat a soup dumpling in one bite, really.

12:07

So what you need to, if you

12:09

try and bite one side of it, probably a

12:11

huge jet of boiling

12:13

fat will shoot out the other end.

12:15

I either go all down your front

12:18

or blind a passing child. So

12:21

you either need to wait, which

12:23

is obviously impossible. Suboptimal. Because

12:25

it feels great. Or you need to nibble

12:27

a little hole in the casing and then pour

12:29

out some of the soup. It's extremely difficult. I'll

12:31

tell you the secret. Down in one. You

12:34

can't. Well, OK, fine. It's

12:36

like a

12:38

little, like a tide

12:40

pod full of boiling water. Yeah,

12:44

that's exactly what I'm into. I think

12:47

there might be something wrong with it. We went for

12:49

lunch yesterday while we were shooting D&D and

12:51

I went to a spicy

12:53

hot chicken place. Nice. It

12:56

was specifically all it did was

12:58

really hot chicken, spicy hot chicken.

13:01

And I said, I'll have a spicy hot

13:03

chicken sandwich, please. And they gave me that

13:05

sandwich and they gave me a pair of

13:07

disposable gloves to eat the sandwich

13:10

with. And I'm like, well, I assume

13:12

this is because it's so fantastically dangerously hot that

13:14

if I were to get the chili on my

13:16

fingers and they accidentally rub my eyes, I

13:18

would die. And so I was

13:20

like, oh, no, I think I might have been off more

13:22

than I can chew here. I might be in for trouble.

13:24

And honestly, nothing

13:27

is like it was like nothing. It was like cool,

13:30

like cool ranch chicken. That's

13:33

like a different type of hot though. That's

13:35

spicy hot as opposed to soup dumplings, which

13:37

is literally temperature. I'm just saying I might

13:39

be the best at both. Well, you should

13:41

do a challenge then. They have all kinds

13:43

of like wing challenges around the whole wings.

13:45

Oh, I thought you must have the infamous

13:47

web video series about where they eat. Oh

13:49

yeah. Not hot ones for sure. But also

13:51

find a food challenge where you get all

13:53

the wings free if you eat them. I'll

13:55

do it. Does anyone do a food

13:57

challenge that's about temperature as well? I

14:00

don't think so because that is like physically

14:02

deleterious to your body. But we could start

14:04

a new YouTube channel called Jane vs Food.

14:07

Yeah. And we'll go around and have

14:10

you eat hot wings. Yeah, plasma

14:12

hot soup dumplings as well. Because

14:14

no one else wants to do that. Because it's

14:16

dangerous. Because no one else wants to put boiling

14:19

liquids in their mouth. Yeah. All

14:21

right, I'm up for that. Okay, I feel

14:23

like it is time to give the

14:25

good people what they actually came here for, which

14:27

is less danger chairs and soup dumplings and more

14:30

tabletop role playing games, specifically Blades

14:32

in the Dark. Please

14:34

enjoy the death of Cornelius

14:36

Bagshot, which features me, Johnny

14:39

and obviously our storyteller Luke

14:41

Questaway. Hello

14:47

everyone and welcome back to Oxford Venture Presents Blades

14:50

in the Dark. I'm Luke and I'm joined by...

14:53

Kazimir Jones. I

14:55

assume we've met. Yeah, well

14:57

I'm just a kind of sort of voice

15:00

in your head, I guess, Kazimir. Kind of

15:02

the spirit of intuition. The kind of voice

15:04

in your head you have to introduce yourself to. Well

15:08

yeah, manners maketh the man. I

15:13

think I was probably aiming for like, I

15:16

assume my reputation precedes me, but instead I

15:18

said I think we've met. That's

15:20

what we're going with. And

15:24

who else is here? I'm Zilla.

15:27

I'm the muscle around

15:29

here. Don't you forget it. The

15:32

muscle. Okay, right, well.

15:35

Let's talk downtime. So to

15:37

set the scene, it's a couple of

15:40

days later after the great opera heist

15:43

in which you in huge style

15:45

declared to all of Volusport that

15:47

you are here, you're here to

15:49

steal, and that if

15:51

there are any secret societies listening

15:54

or watching, hopefully it was a sort

15:56

of dog whistle to them that they

15:58

may have maybe will respond to. So

16:00

everyone in town is gossiping about this audacious

16:02

heist talking about the hobby horses will they

16:05

strike again? Why did they declare

16:07

their names? Is it the lamp-blacks

16:09

will they be killed by the lamp-blacks? Questions

16:11

such as these in these last few days

16:14

folks downtime Kazimir and Zilla What have you

16:16

been doing as a

16:18

reminder to the viewer downtime and blades in the

16:20

dark involves things like? healing

16:24

Dressing long-term projects acquiring assets

16:26

that sort of thing everyone gets two actions

16:29

Let's hear them is Zilla's vice

16:33

obligation Zilla's vice

16:35

is overindulging in

16:37

violence, okay, so Not

16:40

quite because okay, cuz I was

16:42

gonna say if it counts as an obligation basically

16:44

if we indulge vice together Because

16:47

of my spider abilities we

16:49

can both Adjust the dice outcome

16:52

up or down by one or two

16:55

Oh, so you can either clear more

16:57

stress, or if you're in danger of

16:59

overindulging And you'll

17:01

be safer. Yeah, so like well I

17:04

guess what this would manifest is that like

17:06

if we did this you would go to a like

17:08

a Boxing ring and

17:10

kick the crap out of some cage

17:12

match. Yeah, well, I'm tending to my

17:14

knee I Just

17:17

sort of rubbing your oils into it making

17:19

sure my braces all yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well

17:21

Zilla would take Kazimir to

17:23

like a sort of steampunk physiotherapist

17:26

perhaps oh, it's a sort of

17:28

you know a fight physician a

17:30

fight doctor Oh, yeah It

17:34

isn't it's a book in the ring, but I'll do it Massage

17:38

or whatever passes for a sports massage. I

17:40

would love that. I would be an honor

17:42

to hold your spit bucket in Nice

17:46

nice and it's much better than what I

17:48

was thinking which was Zilla swinging Kazimir hard

17:50

into a rival boxer by the leg I'm

17:53

hoping that it's that's what we call chiropractic I

17:58

mean if the shoe Do you fit? Just

18:01

crack! Yep. Okay,

18:03

so we're, um, I like this, a

18:06

kind of joint vice indulgence to clear

18:08

stress, and it is going to take

18:10

the form of Zilla taking

18:12

Kazimir to a sports physio. So,

18:16

you visit a purveyor of vice

18:18

when you indulge. Vice

18:21

you roll dice equal to your lowest attribute, and

18:24

clear stress equal to your highest die result,

18:26

but I suppose Kazimir, because of your magical

18:28

spider skills, um, that will

18:30

work slightly differently? Yes. Okay.

18:33

So my worst in, my worst attribute is now up to

18:35

two dice, which is great, and I've

18:37

rolled a five. Okay, great. So

18:40

I'm going to up that by one, and completely

18:42

clear my stress. Amazing.

18:44

Amazing. Completely de-stressed. And

18:47

does that apply to Zilla as

18:49

well? No, Zilla

18:51

does her own roll, and then can adjust the

18:53

highest die result up or down by one or

18:55

two. Cool, cool, cool. Okay, Zilla, so let's

18:57

have a, yeah,

18:59

so equal to your lowest attribute. So

19:02

my lowest attribute is still a one, actually.

19:04

It's a one in Prowl, so that's not very good.

19:08

And that was a four. That's, that's good.

19:10

Okay. Cool. Four

19:12

stress. Well, five if you want to nudge it up. Or six

19:14

if you want. Or six. I'm not

19:17

that stressed, so I think I can, I think I'll be alright

19:19

with a four. Yeah, you don't want to overindulge. No,

19:21

no, no, no. Okay, brilliant. I

19:23

think you both have one more downtime action

19:25

as well if you want to. Yeah. Can

19:28

I acquire an asset, please? I would love it

19:30

if you did, Kazumi, yeah. Okay.

19:34

Um, just got a feeling about this one. Never know when it's

19:36

going to come in handy, but I would like a massive bomb.

19:39

Okay. It's

19:42

either that or a getaway vehicle, a massive bomb is

19:44

more fun, isn't it? Yeah, that's great.

19:47

You never know when you'll need a massive bomb. Right,

19:49

and you don't want to be caught without one. Better

19:52

to have one or not need a massive bomb. Roll

19:56

the cruise, Tear. I don't think we've

19:58

really talked about Tear. levels before

20:00

we start tracking. Which

20:03

means that the tier as it stands is sort

20:05

of zero but let's call it one I think

20:07

that would be more than fair wouldn't it. Thank

20:09

you that's kind. Let's say it levelled up. So

20:11

I'm rolling 1d6. Yeah 1d6 the

20:14

result will indicate the quality of the asset

20:16

so you're gonna get that bomb catamir. Well

20:18

I rolled a one. Oh no! Like

20:21

an acne cartoon bomb. Now

20:24

that is and not my words an

20:27

inferior bomb. In fact because

20:29

it was specifically a one I know

20:31

this is slightly bending the rules but I'm gonna say

20:33

it's it is an inferior bomb but

20:35

catamir canonically does not know that.

20:37

Yep that is absolutely fine. Um

20:41

tip top bomb this. Yep

20:43

it's just a good standard issue good

20:46

bomb. I've been watching Edvard sort of tinkering away in

20:48

his little lab I reckon I got this. Yeah it

20:50

looks easy. I know a good bomb when I see

20:52

one mate and that is a good bomb. Okay

20:55

brilliant and Zilla you've got one more downtime.

20:57

Yeah I mean the elephant in the room

21:00

is that we're not reducing heat because

21:02

we've got a lot of heat on us but also

21:04

we kind of want a lot of heat on us

21:06

because we're trying to draw down the ire of our

21:10

enemies. There you go. So that's

21:12

what that is why I'm not using my

21:14

downtime actions to reduce heat which would be

21:17

wise according to some. Instead

21:19

I'm gonna train I'm gonna

21:21

train 1xp onto my

21:24

wreck. Okay brilliant. I

21:26

want a wreck monster. That is

21:28

smart. I very rarely get to wreck

21:30

things but when I do it's gonna be

21:32

it's gonna be good times. Yeah.

21:35

Cool mark 1xp for an attribute on your

21:37

playbook. Xp is another thing that we've not

21:40

really been tracking but um maybe now is the

21:42

time to start. Or

21:45

maybe I will maybe we

21:47

can just amalgamise your general

21:49

intention to train into a.

21:51

Yeah. In fiction when we

21:53

went to the cage fight and Kazmir

21:55

was having his knee attended to. Yeah.

21:57

That's when I was training. Yeah. I

22:00

trained up a full dot. Not

22:02

a full dot.

22:04

It's a lingo. Not a full dot.

22:07

No. What? I know. It's

22:10

not as good as you think. No,

22:12

I'm looking at it now. Yeah, I see it. It's

22:15

not a dot. It's

22:18

a little jagged rectangle. Okay,

22:21

so I add one next. Ah, yes. And

22:23

there's so many rectangles. There's

22:26

my misunderstanding there. It's hard.

22:28

It's really hard to level up in places. That

22:30

makes more sense though, because otherwise I could have fully

22:33

leveled this character in like three sessions.

22:35

Yeah. You get OP. Yeah. But

22:38

we're not going to let that happen. I will still take that XP

22:40

for the day when we start doing XP. I

22:42

tell you what, make it two, because I'm

22:44

hoping that you use the rule that we've

22:47

never used before. Oh, okay. Yeah,

22:49

yeah. Every day's a school day. It's great.

22:51

Two XP to reckon. Yeah. I'm

22:54

just glad we're not clearing heat, because

22:56

also if there's any

22:59

score that's going to go flawlessly, it's

23:01

with this combination. Yeah. Yeah,

23:04

you got nothing to worry about. Yeah, exactly. You

23:06

know? This one's a nailed

23:08

on winner. Oh yeah, mate. I'm not worried.

23:10

I'll tell you who is worried though, is

23:13

Eleanor, who maybe wasn't fully consulted

23:15

as to the sort of

23:17

explosive nature of the Opera heist, and

23:19

has made the very good point to

23:21

you as a gang, that it won't

23:23

be long before the antique shop that

23:25

you used to operate from comes

23:28

under suspicion. You cleared it

23:30

out months ago. Don't worry. You

23:33

went over there in the six months between

23:35

the seasons and you emptied the place out. But

23:37

she makes the point that it might be a

23:39

good idea, now that it's going to almost certainly

23:41

come under scrutiny or

23:43

suspicion from the bluecoats,

23:45

and maybe more sinister forces as

23:47

well, to make sure that nothing

23:50

overly incriminating was left. So that

23:52

is where we find our two

23:54

adventurers, Kazimir and Zilla. You are

23:56

stood outside the antique shop, trying

23:58

to remember. who had a spare key and

24:02

from an alleyway next to

24:04

the antique shop you

24:06

hear a vague clanking sound.

24:09

Oh no. I

24:14

feel like Casimir is only half listening.

24:16

He's like look all I'm

24:18

saying is we like this fuse pop

24:20

it in the letterbox as lunch. Bingo

24:24

bango. Can't find anything incriminating in the

24:26

shop if there isn't a shop to

24:28

look in. Mark? From

24:31

the alleyway you hear a slightly

24:33

more urgent clanking and

24:35

a muffled voice going hello.

24:41

It sounds like you're thinking of blowing

24:44

up this establishment. I'd

24:47

realise I didn't get a vote but if

24:49

I could vote I would say no

24:52

let me leave first. Thank

24:54

you. I think we've got

24:57

a squatterzilla. Yeah I go around the

24:59

corner and look at the source of the urgent

25:01

clanking and also voice. In

25:03

front of you is a metal

25:06

dumpster. I don't know

25:08

what a Victorian dumpster looked like they probably threw it

25:10

all out the window but like I don't know imagine

25:13

a dumpster but it's got cogs on it or something.

25:16

And it's a sort of rattling back and

25:18

forth. And

25:21

a fox for some reason. Good

25:24

and fair visually I'm there.

25:27

And a pill hanging off the big hat. Yeah

25:30

exactly. And also a valve is

25:32

emitting steam. And

25:34

you hear a voice from inside the bingo.

25:37

Yeah, well I'd rather give it away

25:40

my position actually. I'd hoist

25:42

open the Victorian steampunk dumpster. And

25:45

if you say it's a dumpster you

25:47

see a heavyset gentleman in expensive

25:49

looking clothing that is now

25:52

quite stinky. And he is cowering

25:54

there in amongst the waste. Probably

25:57

the waste that you threw out like six months ago so it's... Yeah.

26:00

pretty rancid at this point. It's a

26:02

lot of old Barnaby's gin bottles and

26:05

odds and ends from Edvard's

26:08

experiments. Hello,

26:11

I'm terribly sorry. Are

26:14

you the owner of this establishment? Who's

26:17

asking? What are you doing? You

26:19

know, I've steamed drunk dustbin. Yeah, I've

26:21

got to say, if this is a new

26:23

iteration of the wonderful mechanical man, I do

26:25

not care for it. Yeah, I

26:28

did wonder with the clanking. I

26:31

don't know much about what

26:34

marvellous mechanical men, but I

26:36

rather hope that I can introduce myself. At

26:39

least I'm Cornelius

26:41

Bagshot. He holds out a hand, a

26:43

friendly hand, to shake. It's

26:45

got a banana peel on it, which he notices is too

26:47

late. Now, charmed.

26:50

Sorry about that. Um,

26:55

I don't mean to be rude, but,

26:58

um, are we either of you

27:00

two thieves by any chance? You're

27:02

not. Are

27:05

you a cop? You've got to

27:07

tell us if you're a cop, because that's entrapment,

27:09

sir. Are you fond of the green, green grass

27:11

at home, mate? Are

27:14

you thieves? You might think I was born

27:16

yesterday. Oh yeah, mate. Here

27:18

I am. Bam. Blue

27:21

coats. Heavens, no, I

27:23

assure you, I'm, I of all people, have been

27:26

no position at all to be getting the

27:28

law, uh, involved. Right.

27:31

How so? It's not a legal living

27:33

in a bin. Might I be permitted

27:35

to climb out of this, uh, rather

27:38

incommodious vessel and, uh, explain

27:40

my presence? Yeah, how about it? We do,

27:42

yeah. Yes, very good. He goes to climb

27:44

out the dumpster. Um, let's say as he

27:47

does the whole dumpster, like, falls forward and

27:49

he, like, spills out on his

27:51

belly. Oh, wow. Oh,

27:53

heavens, um, is

27:55

there somewhere we might go that's a little more

27:57

comfortable, Um, to talk and maybe a-

28:00

little more private, Yes,

28:02

Yeah yeah well we were trying to

28:04

get in here but I'm guessing upset

28:06

that without pause and does could be

28:09

a pop up on every corner. To

28:12

acquire pub is a must

28:14

go to a quiet pub.

28:17

You are sitting over a

28:19

in in a discrete table

28:22

and corner and many folks

28:24

around. And

28:27

Cornelius is explaining himself a he

28:29

tells you that he is a

28:31

bookkeeper by trade. he says a.

28:34

I work alone. hum I operator

28:36

a small bit more profitable lot

28:38

of accounting else in Bright Stone.

28:40

much more profitable by fall since

28:43

a few years. hence when I

28:45

was approached about taking on new

28:47

client. A

28:50

small. Group. For.

28:53

Whom privacy was of the. Utmost

28:56

importance. I

28:59

never met the individuals as I

29:01

i stress and everything was handled

29:04

via need to intermediary. Who. Wore

29:06

a mask, Never

29:08

told me her name. only a cool

29:10

name I assume unless her name was

29:12

a single letter with. A purpose

29:15

rather odd, wouldn't it? Up.

29:19

Again he he loves but the losses

29:21

cuts, shorts seen you're totally faces. He

29:24

takes a swig and continuous. A

29:27

bit of the meeting place and

29:30

was always different. I'm a note

29:32

would be delivered to my home

29:34

and till mid place and time

29:36

I'm was an unconventional arrangement further

29:39

a profitable one by Jovan who

29:41

might have turned down us as

29:43

the the needs of an anonymous

29:46

few now. however. I. Believe

29:48

that that small select group. Plans.

29:51

To kill me. And that's

29:53

why you're hiding in a bit. At

29:56

the end of it with well

29:58

sub? Yeah I'm ah ah. The

30:00

perfect man. I.

30:03

Enjoy! Certain. Pursuits.

30:07

Reserved for example, seven

30:09

gentlemanly pursuit for example,

30:11

souffle increasing ones capital

30:13

through say, That.

30:16

Placing on the sporting event. Like

30:20

a flutter is what I'm trying to say.

30:22

I guess I could not say the same.

30:25

Lot know I know that Slim

30:27

not. Much. Of a gambler? A gambler. How

30:29

about area? Never. Gamble.

30:32

That. A

30:35

Mercy Gambling House of

30:37

know remains to progress.

30:40

Is your former of mystery try to

30:42

turn into the ones? Is that your

30:45

in a lot of gambling debt? said

30:47

the Arab. Emirates ah

30:49

well as. The

30:52

as you are you are in a stupor as I as I

30:55

see. Yeah. And to bring

30:57

it back around to why you are

30:59

in the Victorian Steampunk. Dumped I is

31:01

why I was in the been. yes I

31:03

see I see that you are. you're like

31:05

us, a terrier with that point hopefully not

31:07

know soon Federal Gov years with no of

31:10

ah yes as though as I've explained I

31:12

I do enjoy it a little gambling then

31:14

yes by I have been on a little

31:16

bit of an unlucky streak recently that I'm

31:18

confident is about to reverse but some. Well

31:22

my. Anonymous employers

31:24

are. They. Don't

31:26

like. People. They

31:28

work with to. Be. In debt

31:31

ordinary to have any vices

31:33

whatsoever, I was warned ah,

31:35

about my gambling in. Rather,

31:37

Threatening terms on to previous occasions and

31:39

Sab it was made clear to me

31:42

that to the next. Instance

31:44

would be the last.

31:47

Ah, unfortunately. Yesterday.

31:51

Morning I woke up after drunken

31:53

night spending was summoned to a

31:55

meeting with Maya mysterious intermediary and

31:57

will. Problem is that they were.

32:00

Nice about it. He are really

32:02

nice. They told me that they

32:04

were satisfied with my work and

32:06

thus far but that they wish

32:08

to go in another direction. And

32:12

it was at that point that I became convinced that

32:14

they mean to kill me. Or you.

32:16

Secrecy was of the utmost importance to this group.

32:19

I know they're involved in some. Shady.

32:22

Doing that the highest levels and.

32:25

I don't believe they want any loose ends

32:27

and I am one such because of my

32:29

vices which they deem. presumably.

32:32

An opportunity for leverage have some such I

32:34

I don't know but I i think the

32:36

try to kill me and I. I

32:39

I think maybe our our. Our.

32:42

Plans could aligned in that I think maybe they also want

32:44

to kill you was. well. Oh

32:46

because I was literally about to ask. This

32:49

group is Not Us. Is it because it's

32:51

just pop the fees on this and you

32:53

to say the words in it was no

32:55

yes. Well before. yeah.

32:57

Why? Why did you want to kill us? I've

33:00

been to be ago unexplained been similar

33:02

clothes because of the been or at

33:04

we didn't take out burial for goodness

33:06

no of a off oh no oh

33:08

no I did work at the council

33:10

in a previous role. in my goodness

33:12

you know they can be quite authoritarian

33:14

about the about collection days and such

33:16

hope of know I'm at this meeting

33:18

that I was at an somebody came

33:20

and whispered something to my intermediary. I

33:22

overheard the word hobby horses which of

33:25

course I knew from the papers from

33:27

the daring exploits. I

33:29

am a bookkeeper. I know a little something

33:31

about moving money around and I always

33:33

thought an antique shop would be a

33:35

good syncing spots. When I went to

33:37

the city records and found the name

33:39

of this place has and as antiques

33:41

and a hobby horse icon above the

33:43

door I thought i believe these are

33:45

the hobby horses and I came here

33:47

to find you are so that you

33:50

could help to fake my death. Please.

33:53

He wow little loose and though on if.

33:56

he or should we fake a rather than

33:58

just doing it. Ah,

34:01

uh, straight to business, good. Reason

34:05

being, if you do fake my death and

34:07

get me out of town, I'll

34:09

tell you what little I know about this mysterious

34:11

group who I believe perhaps you wish to know

34:13

a little about. Alright. And

34:17

obviously, if you're

34:19

dead you can't tell us. Exactly, yes.

34:22

Alright. But alive, I would

34:25

be more than willing. Happy

34:28

to help. I

34:31

sort of looked as ill there as a satellite. Thoughts?

34:35

How do we know you're not lying

34:37

about your intel? How

34:41

can I prove it to you? I don't know. That's

34:43

your problem, not mine. Oh, right.

34:45

Yes or no, very good point. You haven't given me. Um,

34:49

we could go back to my office, I could show you some

34:52

papers. As I say,

34:54

almost all of my paperwork was, uh,

34:57

anonymised, but it might

34:59

indicate, at least prove that

35:02

I am indeed a bookkeeper, and

35:04

that I did dealings with an anonymous group beyond

35:06

that. I don't really know what I can prove.

35:08

That was the whole point of their secrecy,

35:10

but I will help however I can. Well,

35:13

I'll tell you what. We'll make you

35:15

a little deal. Yes.

35:19

We swear to do everything we can to get you

35:21

out in the city. And,

35:23

and, my, they, I must not be

35:25

pursued. You have no idea how powerful

35:27

and far-reaching their influence is. They must

35:29

believe me dead. We will

35:31

do everything we can to successfully fake

35:33

your death and smuggle you out

35:35

of Vollisport. In

35:37

return, you agree never

35:41

to reveal the information you know about

35:43

us, our premises, our

35:46

physical descriptions, etc. etc. Oh,

35:50

gosh, Mum's the word, yes, absolutely. Quiet as

35:52

a tomb, me, yes, may as well whisper

35:54

it to a corpse. Not

35:56

that I'm planning on dying. Check

35:58

on it. I just go s

36:01

is as as soon as there is any gentlemen would.

36:05

I best some sort of smother

36:07

hands clasped the yes him smoke

36:09

so the city's out if I

36:11

like the space between of moms

36:13

and when he pulls his way

36:15

he'll say that there is sort

36:17

of. A. Strange floral design

36:19

it into the skin of his palm

36:21

and over his wrist. who is beautiful.

36:24

Ah, What Is this? If

36:27

you don't deserve reminder my long

36:29

as you keep your word. Now

36:32

to stay there. And a month do

36:34

you any home? You are doing the

36:36

right my mind and say you know that

36:38

I suppose and of talk to her again

36:40

in the best case scenario. Well a small

36:42

price to pay a smoker. You're welcome. Frankly,

36:44

this. right? Okay,

36:46

I believe we have an accord. Cuffs

36:50

I. He sits back and and

36:53

seems to relax for the first

36:55

time in about forty eight hours.

36:57

Ah, and just starts to slowly

37:00

good. Or

37:05

Ill so m

37:07

besides possibly. Drinking

37:09

yourself to death? What's a plausible

37:12

way we could fake your untimely

37:14

demise that they would believe What

37:16

he frequents work well apart from

37:19

gambling dens obviously wants a half,

37:21

Where would they expect to find

37:23

he possibly debt. Will.

37:28

Play places that I am. let's

37:31

see I Well I'm this is

37:33

my house of course I'm often

37:35

in my home Mom my but

37:38

my club ah I'm often at

37:40

the club has who has her

37:42

correctly mention that I do have

37:44

them? I am a preferred member

37:47

at some. At. The

37:49

new color go tracing circuits

37:51

that see where l some

37:53

workplaces I frequent. Shopping.

37:57

I do not employ

37:59

a. Seven time and something

38:01

of a ago monde in. I enjoy

38:03

going down to the food market myself

38:05

and I'm and picking the produce other

38:07

humble of it he says. Mess.

38:10

I say. No. One else.

38:13

It's quite the right shovels. Ah,

38:18

Gosh, You know I'm. Now.

38:21

That you make be account for the places

38:23

I frequent. It seems like a lonely life.

38:27

Listen to me, is your sql A

38:29

lot of my to a lot of

38:31

people who are right. The.

38:33

And a lot of people were really. That.

38:35

Like you very much. and when he dead and. Know

38:38

I wouldn't want me alive so I can pay

38:40

up. Wow! I'm. I'm just saying

38:42

if. We seek medical use.

38:45

It wouldn't be the most unbelievable things have happened

38:47

to you. And I wish I

38:49

could say you were wrong, but or regrettably you

38:51

are right. Although I do really my lucky is

38:54

really is on the turn. On

38:56

after all, I found you didn't

38:58

I? Now. We signed him

39:00

and been bed slicing off

39:03

Espnu. thrive. Cause

39:05

married this easing qe more of an accidental

39:08

deaths than a than a fake matter More.

39:10

Think murder can actually be coins.

39:12

So not only. Would. It. In

39:15

homes are I'm. Are.

39:17

Potential fame among all the wrong sort

39:20

of people. A city. But

39:23

something public swimming undeniably

39:25

in a violent no

39:27

no chance of survival.

39:30

Us or thing who has colored

39:32

quite well a mass. Why

39:35

if? We got a to announce

39:37

it. You were of an

39:40

an auction. You're going

39:42

to sell off your state to cover your

39:44

gambling notes. That would get a lot of

39:46

people out there who wanna know where you

39:48

are. Old times. Of. Ss.

39:52

Go on. One of us pretends to

39:54

be an aggrieved party, assuming no basis

39:57

to the punch, of course, The

40:00

eyes of a pistol. Loose powder

40:02

explosion. No bullet in it, of

40:04

course. You go

40:06

down. Little bladder a

40:08

pig's blood squeeze way squeeze

40:10

heavens. He's. Dead have.

40:13

Older. Are we

40:15

going to get that bloody great bell to ring? You

40:19

know, That. The Bellwether Crematorium.

40:21

Of those that long, I mean,

40:24

someone dies. I'm not blood. yeah,

40:26

I suppose her rather who? hard

40:28

to fool the death of Moon

40:31

It we could week now stick

40:33

with me on this. We could.

40:36

Hire somebody to be your body

40:38

double. And then murdered them.

40:41

Ah a will him. Gosh,

40:43

I mean, who would sign up for

40:46

that to be murdered? Sounds horrible amidst.

40:49

A can see you're new to this. Is

40:52

the concept is not to reveal. They

40:55

are you going to kill them A

40:57

gambling terms you can think of, it

40:59

is a nice meal. slave. Oh Harvey

41:02

is not an Isis and Knife or

41:04

a gun. Couple of. Ball.

41:07

Oh, I'm aware, I don't. I feel

41:10

about the idea of some poor sap

41:12

and getting kicking. The back is in

41:14

my play. Some. Orange

41:17

juice just thrown out there. If you're

41:19

squeamish, that's fine. We'll

41:21

I guess is it the is

41:23

The only way I well do

41:25

you have access to a bleeding

41:28

great bell that we can also

41:30

ring at the same time the

41:32

someone site murders if. I.

41:34

Do Not have access to a bleeding

41:37

Trait Bell You have me right now.

41:39

I'm a site somebody comes to ask

41:41

as you go. Problem? Problems.

41:43

Are things that we south. With

41:45

ingenuity, Sometimes

41:47

blatant. great bowels, Zero

41:50

A sort of feel like until can

41:52

load of for console of his. Can

41:54

I just get a vibe? Checkers with

41:56

side. Effects of

41:58

such a pain. Originating right

42:01

now and levels of gets

42:03

me. I mean. Kill. Someone

42:05

don't sell some one that boasts

42:07

workable city since. Your.

42:11

The plan. Would.

42:13

Yes of well I I I

42:15

I think it's a marvelous about

42:17

an auction would certainly bring out

42:19

some a job. As with it's

42:21

it's public. I'm but not to

42:23

publicly are. A

42:26

lot of people would see it. some. It's.

42:28

Especially your mystery would be.

42:31

Murder as right? Yes,

42:33

I'd rather think they would be there

42:35

were owed least have eyes their I'm

42:37

I'm certain they would never appear themselves.

42:41

Know but up? With. They would. Lose.

42:44

Announced. They might use the opportunity to

42:46

assassinate you the option as they want to

42:48

kids and haven't appeared in public for. A

42:50

while price eighties a risk. I suppose

42:53

I must run. You may not

42:55

be the only ones out to kill me. Or.

42:57

You just let the body double. Yes,

43:00

Get. Done in the ass for that. Yes,

43:05

I'm liking it more and more of

43:07

the more I think about being murdered,

43:09

if only convenient, not being murdered business.

43:12

Yes, what's more convincing than an actual

43:14

murder? Although.

43:16

I suppose it's it creates another problem

43:18

in that. Is the body doubles

43:21

with will have to be convincingly. Like

43:24

me and someone who doesn't mind

43:26

dying. How would you and

43:28

minor detail that that last bit

43:30

from says you worry about that

43:33

will worry about ah. But.

43:35

I had a I buy my to. I mean

43:37

don't why mob I'm on board. I'm on

43:39

board. Whatever. whatever your plan is, I am. I

43:41

like his jokes and I'll I'll I'll go along

43:44

with whatever it is. You don't know that the

43:46

gravity tells a day and maybe it's best.

43:48

Maybe it's best I'm I see. Maybe it's best

43:50

that are. You Tell me what I'm doing. Ah,

43:52

and I promise I'll do whatever I need

43:54

to do to get out of this town. That

43:57

godforsaken town allies. Or

43:59

I will note leaders. dead. This is

44:01

gonna be very awkward for you mate but we're about to have

44:03

a team huddle. Right okay.

44:06

So anything you do over here? No

44:08

you didn't. Of course of course as

44:11

I say as the two. Alright

44:13

I'll see you later. Either we're

44:15

talking we go to a butcher's just get

44:18

a load of pig guts put them down

44:20

his shirt open him up everyone goes whirr

44:22

somebody hits a massive bell so

44:25

it seems legitimate or we are talking

44:27

actually finding a body double and then murdering

44:29

them. I'm frankly uneasy. If

44:32

it were I mean if it were fully up to me

44:34

you know exactly what I'd be doing. Fuse

44:37

up, roll it in. Job

44:40

done. Yeah yeah. Um hmm

44:44

I'm not dead against bringing in

44:46

the body double and

44:49

killing him. Maybe

44:52

we could maybe we could find someone who you

44:54

know the city would be better off without if

44:56

we take a trip to

44:58

local jail maybe find someone. It's

45:01

a real nasty sort who happens to resemble

45:04

Cornelius Bagshot. Right

45:06

size right Bill doesn't have to be identical. Right

45:09

if we uh. No. Dress him

45:11

right. Keep him at distance. Get

45:13

him right. Yeah yeah

45:16

yeah nothing left after a bomb right but he doesn't

45:18

have to look anything like him. I knew

45:21

that. I

45:25

knew he had that bomb for a reason. I

45:27

just had it you know some some days you

45:29

just wake up and think I'm

45:32

gonna need a bomb for this one. Yeah

45:34

you were right you were right okay great

45:37

body double. Body double?

45:39

Bomb assassination. Bomb assassination.

45:41

Body double. Get Cornelius

45:43

out of town. Oh god

45:46

it's nice when the kids are out the house. It's

45:50

so simple there's no robot nonsense.

45:53

I shall invent a new type

45:55

of mechanical wonderful

45:57

dying man would

45:59

be useful now, don't you be fair. Yeah,

46:01

in fairness. From

46:04

over your arms in the huddle you noticed that

46:06

uh that Cornelius is sort of going, is

46:09

uh I'm rather nervous about um still

46:11

being out in public, are we approaching the end of

46:13

the uh um the the

46:15

the planning session? We are yeah.

46:18

Marvelous, would you mind just just quickly, so what

46:21

is it, what did you settle on? Um I promise

46:23

I won't mind, I won't balk of

46:25

whatever you ever you propose, I'm

46:27

a desperate man. Maybe it's better that you

46:29

don't know all the details and you just do what

46:31

we tell you. Yeah, fair enough, well what

46:33

shall I do? Well let's get out of

46:35

here I suppose, let's go. You

46:38

need to organize our auction. Yes. Turn

46:40

out some invites. Yes of course. Yes, uh

46:42

how many people, how big and where at

46:45

my home uh somewhere else? How many people do

46:47

you owe money to? Ah,

46:52

I would say there are two

46:57

in fairness, three uh uh

47:00

individuals uh with whom my debts

47:02

may be called somewhat excessive.

47:05

All right let's call it 15 invitees,

47:09

they'll get suspicious if it's only them, you need

47:11

other people who are looking to acquire some uh

47:13

property from a desperate man. Yes,

47:15

yes, yes, should it be uh

47:18

should should the auction be public or invite only?

47:22

Invite only. Right, okay yes

47:25

and and at my home? Zilla,

47:27

you're on security a lot of time. What's

47:30

your home Mike? Oh um

47:32

well it's a

47:35

comfortable um bachelor's accommodation,

47:37

um it's uh it's in bright

47:39

stone. He goes on to describe

47:41

a uh a house,

47:47

what's it called when it's not detached? A

47:50

terrorist? A terrorist, yes. Like a

47:52

townhouse? Yes, a terrorist townhouse. Okay,

47:55

a terrorist townhouse. How

47:57

bomb proof are the walls? I

48:00

think it's going to be

48:02

easier to control in

48:04

a house than in

48:07

a public setting. I think so,

48:09

yeah. In a courtyard. Let's go.

48:11

Let's take it to your house. Yes, of

48:13

course. How will you smuggle me there? I don't wish

48:15

to be seen. I

48:19

mean, the bin's got wheels on it. It's not

48:21

pretty, but the bin has wheels. That's what the cogs

48:23

are. No one's going to look nice. Check the cogs.

48:26

There we go. Yep, cool. Okay. It's

48:29

not as noisy as you wheel it along. Are

48:32

we on the top with one of those pushed in? Yeah,

48:36

you see saw this bin over

48:40

to Cornelius' home. Okay. And

48:42

he lets you in. It's sparsely furnished,

48:45

but the furniture that there is is quite nice.

48:48

He's pretty well to do. I

48:51

do most of my work from home.

48:53

He shows you his study. He does

48:55

indeed show you these anonymized accounts from

48:57

this mysterious group. There's very little

48:59

you can glean from them. It's just rows

49:01

of numbers and coded

49:04

letters. There's almost no information

49:07

on them. And he, I suppose, gets

49:09

to work writing out the invites. Is

49:12

there anything you wish to do to prepare

49:14

or to plan for the auction? Should we

49:17

say the date is set for tomorrow? Sounds

49:19

good. Cool. So

49:21

if there's anything in the intervening time

49:24

you want to get on with, you

49:26

can. The plan now will flash back

49:28

later, right? Exactly. Or we can

49:30

just jump straight there. I would

49:33

like to try and talk

49:37

to somebody about having a wagon

49:39

out the back. Just hire

49:41

a horse and trap so

49:43

we can smuggle him out at the city limits.

49:47

Yeah, that's fine. I don't even

49:49

really feel that that requires a

49:51

role. Not from you, Kazimir. If

49:54

anyone can secure a horse and trap

49:57

for 24 hours time, no questions

49:59

asked. Yeah, that's fine. Thank

50:01

you. I talked to my associate

50:03

zip horse Zip

50:08

carts would have been better wouldn't it? Oh Nothing

50:12

would have been better than zippo Here's

50:17

how I imagine the auction working because you

50:19

don't typically have a stage in in someone

50:21

you know like a stage or a plinth

50:23

or whatever in a in a home, but

50:25

we want some physical distance between the audience

50:27

and And there would

50:29

you know, there's soon to be murdered.

50:31

So we need one of those as well Well,

50:34

we also 24

50:37

hours. Yeah, I'm just

50:40

imagining the layout of the house and If

50:43

Cornelius was to appear out Cornelius was to

50:45

appear a window or on a you

50:47

know Balcony back connect kind of thing

50:49

to you know, maybe run the auction because

50:51

he will be the auctioneer. I see.

50:54

Oh Why don't we say that

50:56

out the back of yeah Well,

50:59

yeah, why don't we say the out

51:01

the rear of the property? Yes a communal

51:03

garden yard. Okay Yeah,

51:07

sort of communal yard with some trees

51:09

and some bits of grass

51:12

and stuff And wagon

51:14

that you're gonna have waiting Kazanir. That's now going to be out the front Great,

51:19

but that's fine if you okay. Okay,

51:21

great somewhere that Cornelius can address

51:23

the crowd From run the

51:25

auction from and they're there to buy the house, right?

51:27

They're there to kind of look at

51:30

the property So kind of make sense. Is

51:32

it an auction of his house? It's

51:34

his estate, right? It's

51:36

a fire sale on everything. He knows.

51:38

Yeah, he's in so much debt It'll

51:40

be everything everything must go. Yeah Okay,

51:44

and then we also need to acquire a body

51:46

double Trifling

51:49

matter. I can't believe we started with or

51:51

some so sorry Oh

51:57

So the body double I almost is an

51:59

afterthought We need a

52:01

secure... OK, let's see... It's

52:04

one thing to glibly talk about doing a murder in

52:06

a pub, it's another thing to actually start planning it,

52:08

isn't it? Yep, yep, yep. Well,

52:11

we want a real low life,

52:14

real scum of the city. I'm

52:16

about to propose breaking into a

52:18

jail and breaking out a terrible,

52:20

terrible murderer. That

52:24

seems like a lot of work. Yeah,

52:27

it's, you know... So much work. That's

52:29

not a legwork. That's a whole pre-heist

52:32

before the heist. We can do that

52:34

if you want, or, you know... You

52:37

might say that the very worst scumbags aren't in jail

52:39

yet. So you're

52:41

proposing we become vigilantes on

52:43

police streets? Oh, sorry, is

52:46

that beyond the pale? Yeah,

52:48

yeah. Oh, I want to be

52:50

vigilant. Vigilante is the reason you draw the

52:52

line. I'm just thinking of

52:54

time, I'm just thinking of how long we've

52:56

got. What if we just found somebody

52:59

absolutely hammered at the docks? You

53:02

know? Yeah. Like,

53:05

for all we know, the tide could have

53:07

come in and they might not have noticed, and

53:10

they would have been washed out to it, so... You

53:12

want to find someone that would almost certainly

53:14

die anyway? Yeah, yeah,

53:17

yeah. It's like karmically sort of

53:19

a zero-sum game. Loophole.

53:24

That's how the mathematics of morality

53:26

works. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, Dilla's

53:29

got dock-working family, and I think

53:31

it's very uncomfortable with... Oh,

53:33

right, yeah, that's fine. ...go scooping up a

53:35

poor Arozian refinery worker or dock worker or

53:37

what have you, and... I'm

53:40

so sorry. ...partner-most. That

53:42

was, yeah. It's okay, it's okay. This

53:44

is what I think the morally proper

53:47

thing to do is go

53:49

out tonight and

53:53

wait till we get set upon, and then

53:55

we'll... Oh, lovely.

53:57

And then they'll deserve it.

53:59

There we go, there we go. Go

54:04

out and wait to get set up on, that's a cool idea.

54:07

Yeah, cool. Nella's going

54:09

to, she's going to be wearing a frilly

54:11

dress and be

54:15

carrying a valuable looking

54:17

purse. I'm picturing the

54:19

strong sister from Encanto. Yeah,

54:21

I'm picturing Batman's parents. She's

54:24

going to have a big show each day with pearls

54:27

and be like, oh I sure hope no one

54:29

catches me in crime alley. Yeah,

54:32

look, crime alley this. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

54:34

Of course, why didn't we think of it? Let's

54:36

go to crime alley. Yes. We're

54:38

looking for scumbags, we go to crime alley. In

54:41

Vollisport you'll have to be more specific, but

54:43

Casimir does know a few alley ways that

54:45

you almost certainly cannot walk from one end

54:47

of the alley to... Great,

54:49

great, great, great. Without having a

54:51

pearl necklace scattered dramatically across the

54:53

floor. Hello and welcome

54:55

to the Eurogamer Newscast, and this week

54:57

we're discussing the biggest Xbox leak in

54:59

history. We're looking ahead to the Switch

55:01

2's potential launch lineup. We're asking why

55:04

there are so many industry layoffs, or

55:06

at least that's what I would be saying.

55:08

If you're listening to the Eurogamer Newscast, hello,

55:11

I'm Tom, Eurogamer's editor and host of our

55:13

weekly discussion podcast, where we break down the

55:15

biggest gaming news stories and share insight from

55:17

our news reporting team. Head to your

55:19

favourite podcast app now to listen to

55:22

Search Eurogamer Newscast. But

55:49

technically I don't come from here. about

56:00

the world at the door if they're

56:02

ever to unravel the truth at the

56:04

heart of the seemingly nondescript town. It's

56:06

not front page of the Suss-eye-star who...

56:08

I follow up the today's instalment of

56:10

the news to see what the front

56:12

page actually is. There's a big picture

56:15

of a pumpkin that's been stepped on.

56:17

And it says Outrage as Pumpkin Step-on.

56:20

Storybreaker Season 1 in its entirety is available

56:23

for listening right now wherever you get your

56:25

podcasts. With Season 2 on the way. Find

56:28

out more at dicebreaker.com. I'm

56:30

going to make some

56:32

hasty alterations to one of Barnaby's tuxedos.

56:36

By which I'm going to put one on and

56:38

then go like that so it rips at the

56:40

shoulders. Yeah, that'll find us. Otherwise, it's going to

56:42

be walking around like that. Barnaby sees you do

56:44

it and goes, aww, put that over that. Don't

56:46

worry about it, big man. Alright, cool. Well,

56:49

so it's the night before. Okay,

56:52

well, you tell me how this is panning out. We'll

56:54

do a little mini score. Okay, oh

56:57

yeah, mini pre-hiced. Okay, well,

56:59

yeah, I've snagged a

57:01

sort of frilly high

57:03

neck ruffled gown from somewhere. Got

57:06

the pearls on. And

57:09

I'm looking as physically unintimidating as

57:11

possible, which is very difficult. You

57:14

know, try to slouch and sort of be

57:17

demure and then we go to Crime

57:20

Alley. Yeah. And sort of...

57:22

Walk up and down. And then you can

57:24

sort of mooch around, one ruff and

57:26

down, talking about how valuable my

57:29

pearl necklace is. Mm-hmm.

57:32

Sure. Kathermear, are you here as well or

57:34

is it as ill? Oh, absolutely, yeah. I'm in my tuxedo. I'm

57:36

whistling a tumeless tune and saying,

57:39

I am so glad that

57:42

we finally got those pearls ensured.

57:44

Because, you know, if they went,

57:46

we'd be right. Yeah. It

57:48

would practically be a victimless crime. How much are

57:50

they insured for again? I can't

57:52

remember the value. Oh, you

57:54

know what? It was... It

57:57

was... What are even the... What's even the

57:59

currency? here I forget a

58:01

coin a coin so

58:03

many coins or so

58:05

many well I'm

58:07

familiar with them I have several of them

58:09

in this fine jacket make

58:13

me I don't know what you're gonna call this

58:15

but I guess you'll have to figure something out

58:17

make me a role for luring a foot

58:20

for trying to get mugged I guess trying

58:23

to get mugged I'm gonna call this

58:25

hunt yeah I'll also let's make

58:27

it a hunt I don't have any dice

58:35

in it so any dots in it I can

58:37

help you for free oh okay great

58:39

for score I can help somebody no twice

58:41

per score I can help somebody for free

58:43

yeah without taking any okay have an extra

58:45

die all right roll well because I got

58:48

a four okay

58:51

we're just marching up and down the street just

58:54

sort of on a patrol you

58:56

have succeeded in your

58:59

plan as you are walking up and down

59:01

promenading up and down crime alley you

59:04

both I mean you're you know by this point

59:06

you're both familiar with the you know the sort

59:08

of netherworld of Volusport you both know

59:11

it's a very obvious shadow sort of moving

59:13

in the in in the in

59:15

a murky corner and suddenly

59:17

out in front of you with a with a with

59:19

a pointy little knife jumps a jumps

59:22

a fellow you're all the four they

59:24

say here's the complication physically he

59:26

doesn't appear to be much of a match for

59:28

Cornelius bag shot he's he's short

59:31

and very wiry and he's in a sort of

59:34

crouch position and he goes freeze

59:38

your pearls all your life this

59:40

one yeah look at

59:42

Casimir like what are

59:45

you talking about I said your pearls all your life and

59:47

I'm over I straight over

59:49

and grasped him by the throat Yeah

59:56

yeah, the knife sort

59:58

of falls weakly. Really? To

1:00:02

so. Sophisticated but he doesn't expect me

1:00:04

i am idea yeah, that's that's fine.

1:00:06

The actually audible. Those. Over him. And then

1:00:08

I souls away and. Go

1:00:11

Fuck. Of Ups. I

1:00:14

saw away a small, impressionable child who might

1:00:16

be having a formative moment is possibly sending

1:00:18

through a knife a vigilante justice. Go get

1:00:20

out of it. So. In Europe. Go.

1:00:25

Brilliance you leave thousand taxes we

1:00:28

the way that at with a

1:00:30

ne'er do wells a klutz did

1:00:32

you. Get.

1:00:37

A d Take him out unconscious because I.

1:00:40

Get my you're going to be I

1:00:42

know it exists cool for to I

1:00:44

guess right? I

1:00:46

think at this point we start

1:00:48

doing everything else by flashbacks I

1:00:51

catch idea yeah let's get says

1:00:53

ago planning only only for us

1:00:55

right young engagement role for him

1:00:57

then say we take it as

1:00:59

just the pre heists one yet

1:01:01

I was the free I did

1:01:03

the actual today Oh wait first

1:01:05

what kind of score is this

1:01:07

Do you think I'm which like

1:01:09

a reminder of the kindness sees

1:01:11

a Soap Stevens to a Targets.

1:01:14

The Movie some of that deceptions

1:01:16

low trickle, manipulate some of that

1:01:18

to Dallas trespass unseen approximately Data

1:01:20

supernatural power social because if I

1:01:22

have swayed or transport carry cargo

1:01:24

people three danger. Room

1:01:27

as as. That

1:01:29

have been on Mavis Transport is actually the

1:01:31

one that. As the plan isn't,

1:01:33

it arrived it yeah. Yeah.

1:01:36

Yeah. So. How ago? Or people

1:01:38

through danger? Of

1:01:41

yeah, not everyone has to make a. Little.

1:01:44

Must is danger and some people are going

1:01:46

to be carries toward it that much he

1:01:48

says. And it is vital that you carry

1:01:50

a purse and through this year. The.

1:01:52

Intense. Even. Consensually

1:01:55

of his That that is what it is.

1:01:57

There must be. some violence and since of this. Well

1:02:01

the detail I need is the root and

1:02:03

means that I I kind of feel it.

1:02:05

You have to provide it but maybe maybe

1:02:07

just explains began what is the root and

1:02:09

means by which you are going to buy

1:02:11

what you up the plot you are planning

1:02:14

on protecting Cornelius conceptually. three is we hold

1:02:16

an option. Yeah and. Then. Cornelius.

1:02:19

Ah, it appears to be

1:02:21

assassinated. Is a notion? Leave

1:02:24

immediately. Suing hop up yet we

1:02:26

spare him out the front door

1:02:28

into a cart and we could

1:02:30

whisk him to the railway station

1:02:33

like gather grow so ship. From

1:02:36

on high speed train out of of others

1:02:38

for thought. He gets make i

1:02:40

don't know and also yeah someone. Has to

1:02:42

die in order for the as the great.

1:02:44

Back. Off to told otherwise even

1:02:47

will know what paths of

1:02:49

and about Yes ssssss find

1:02:51

a bell So we did

1:02:53

everything about see found a

1:02:55

a taxi as url Their

1:02:57

life has a cool character

1:02:59

loads. I'm going

1:03:01

to have a word with going in

1:03:03

as assassins. Right depth, plenty of a

1:03:05

guy. Ah cool.

1:03:07

Save one day for sheer luck. Busy

1:03:09

busy can be bolder daring. Isn't

1:03:12

is always Is it originally complex? No

1:03:15

no one l A or a lake

1:03:17

house you dream of this is exposed

1:03:19

the vulnerability you hit them were their

1:03:22

we. The Throat.

1:03:24

Yes, specifically. Ff. Ff. Ff.

1:03:28

Ah a fragile body I'm feeling

1:03:30

know that our own other became

1:03:32

a defenses or preparations but also

1:03:34

know so keeping keeping keeping it

1:03:36

to can friends or contacts provide

1:03:38

aid can they. Mean

1:03:41

to be honest the feel people we bringing on

1:03:43

this the better. So I'm. Sure,

1:03:46

My because of at our enemies or

1:03:48

rivals involves. ah yes they're going to be

1:03:50

there to be. There is a risky ones.

1:03:52

I have a risky one. Dire. He.

1:03:55

We go. Oh

1:04:04

No. No

1:04:08

Or. Or

1:04:10

says the situation rather lay

1:04:12

out of the home so

1:04:14

he's got You Have got.

1:04:17

Lawn chairs out on that kind of

1:04:19

scrubby bit of communal land. A you

1:04:21

kind of arranged them in in rows

1:04:23

with the idea that most people at

1:04:25

the auction as I think you were

1:04:28

describing in your plan will be outside

1:04:30

the home itself. Meanwhile, on the the.

1:04:32

These. Chairs accountable facing towards the sort of

1:04:34

a French window. Yeah, a nice big French.

1:04:36

We know that that kind of opens out.

1:04:40

And. The guests are currently

1:04:42

filing through. You are a you

1:04:44

guests, Are you pretending to be?

1:04:46

Yes. Are you pretending to be

1:04:48

people in the home of the

1:04:50

acting have a So package. Yeah,

1:04:52

I say went with option

1:04:55

assistance. Your auction assistance yes

1:04:57

I'm so ever i rather sweaty and

1:04:59

nervous or Cornelius back shelters is ushering

1:05:01

people through to the homeowner. Yes I'm

1:05:03

an obvious after the bullet for me

1:05:06

to as I was under the Csu

1:05:08

garden. Take us take a seat anywhere

1:05:10

the off and will begin shortly people

1:05:12

up or filing through the home out

1:05:15

him to the garden but before they

1:05:17

get. To. The garden.

1:05:20

There. Is a loud thump from

1:05:22

outside and you realize that the

1:05:24

he says he realized that someone

1:05:26

is escape their bonds. And

1:05:29

you to read the book. The fifth

1:05:31

of the people coming down the stairs

1:05:33

ah and suddenly streaking into the room

1:05:35

is there is your thief from last

1:05:38

night and they are making a beeline

1:05:40

straight for the front door. As I've been

1:05:42

saying and I've been oh yeah ever on the

1:05:44

day that oh no. Depicted

1:05:47

the toughest stop?

1:05:50

Yes, Yes, Oda

1:05:52

Oh nazis. In our house.

1:05:54

Zone Day of Iraq. Since Cornelius had

1:05:56

Cornelius didn't know about this person you're

1:05:59

tied to happen. Get the bonds when

1:06:01

super tight. said you wanted to like

1:06:03

keep details could alias only Adidas and

1:06:05

I like the essential soured. Yeah yeah

1:06:08

we didn't want to know as as he

1:06:10

does the details well here's a here's a

1:06:12

Dirty Details. Cornelia that dreams are

1:06:14

suffering and. Had

1:06:17

also makes a run for it. Doesn't

1:06:21

say side by side. With

1:06:23

this is right and that is the

1:06:25

situation. The. Oh

1:06:28

Wow. Okay, okay, I

1:06:30

know what. begin. Okay,

1:06:33

Well. I say said

1:06:35

see the kidnapped would be

1:06:38

see. Out into

1:06:40

this as a moral suggests. in

1:06:42

the street or in the house,

1:06:45

right? Now in the house it's of ass

1:06:47

the it's all cracked ribs if it is

1:06:49

not on the doorstep. And which case on

1:06:51

a let him let him escape the

1:06:53

front door and then tackle him on

1:06:56

the front steps. Okay, cool. I'm

1:06:58

finally when you're hundred may be

1:07:00

heading to see them difference maybe

1:07:03

role for that. While

1:07:06

you're what you're reading, that cause of what's your,

1:07:08

what's your thinking. I would

1:07:10

like to look around the room

1:07:12

and make sure that nobody dies

1:07:14

guessing ideas and trying to take

1:07:16

this as a a fine opportune

1:07:18

moments to to our our good

1:07:20

friend in February. Six

1:07:23

two boxes of load stray off the

1:07:25

bat and gesture. Or a pistol? In

1:07:27

a damn well I'm just like I'm

1:07:29

gonna so stand next to Coney this

1:07:32

is gathering be like. Everybody.

1:07:34

Become them. Cool. Very

1:07:36

cool. That's great. No need to have that.

1:07:39

He. Took the load us. brilliant. That says Zilla.

1:07:41

How did you do? I want to six

1:07:43

so. I. Can doing this your would

1:07:45

be mugu. Fifth, possibly that their legs are

1:07:47

all cramped up from having been stuffed in

1:07:50

a in a cupboard or or something up

1:07:52

says they are not as fast or as

1:07:54

powerful as you. You easily bring them down.

1:07:57

and yeah have the months more by

1:07:59

the Say,

1:08:03

I really am somewhat sorry

1:08:05

about this. Yeah, you feel you want to form

1:08:07

any kind of emotional bond with them, they might

1:08:09

talk back. No, I'm squeezing them,

1:08:11

squeezing the breath out. I

1:08:14

really am sorry. If you'd stayed asleep, you wouldn't

1:08:17

have woken up before we exploded you, so think

1:08:19

on that. And then he's

1:08:21

unconscious. Yeah, he's unconscious. He's unconscious before

1:08:23

he could say anything humanising, that's good.

1:08:25

Okay. Yeah, I'm going to

1:08:27

go, shh, shh, shh. You're hush now, hush now. No

1:08:30

redeeming qualities, please. Don't be a dairy. Don't do

1:08:32

a voice for God's sake. Don't

1:08:35

do a voice, don't mention a family member.

1:08:38

I love of God, don't give him

1:08:40

a name. And

1:08:43

then I head for the servants entrance, which is

1:08:45

in the basement of course. Yeah,

1:08:47

that's fine. There's a... You can re-enter the

1:08:49

house from the different... Yeah, you've got a

1:08:51

downstairs entrance to the front. Yeah,

1:08:54

so you can just pop down there

1:08:56

and you're in there unseen. Okay, I

1:08:58

bundled him back into the building. Meanwhile,

1:09:01

Kazimir, you pull your pistols and

1:09:03

step towards Cornelius. The whole

1:09:05

room, there is a definite hubbub. Everyone

1:09:09

is sort of panicking. No one is quite sure. Most

1:09:12

of the people who've shown up are

1:09:15

clearly estate

1:09:17

agents, house flippers, property

1:09:21

speculators, that

1:09:23

kind of thing. But there are a

1:09:25

few individuals, Kazimir, that your

1:09:27

discerning eye identifies as not

1:09:29

what you would call the usual crowd. In

1:09:32

particular, a very large and burly

1:09:35

shaved headed gentleman who you now

1:09:38

realize was in fact making a

1:09:40

very smooth beeline

1:09:43

towards Cornelius and stops as

1:09:46

you raise the pistols. Don't get

1:09:48

any bright ideas, my friend. You

1:09:50

just stay right there and we're going to have

1:09:52

ourselves a lovely little auction as

1:09:54

soon as things come back down, all right? A

1:09:57

lovely auction is exactly what I

1:09:59

am. I am here for. Lovely.

1:10:03

Well then you'll be willing to take your seat, won't you?

1:10:06

Yes. For the auction. Yes.

1:10:09

I would suggest everybody who is interested

1:10:11

in the lovely auction takes

1:10:14

their seat. I shall just

1:10:16

have a little word with our good friend

1:10:18

Cornelius here to remind him which lot is

1:10:20

up first, of course. And

1:10:23

then we shall proceed. Great. As

1:10:26

the crowd sort of... there's a bit of...

1:10:31

But you know what, this kind of thing

1:10:33

is actually quite common in property auctions. It

1:10:36

tends to be weird circumstances where anything

1:10:39

can happen down on their luck individuals,

1:10:42

that sort of thing. So as everyone is finally out

1:10:44

into the garden, you also notice Kazimir. Another

1:10:47

one who's clearly not part of the usual crowd is

1:10:49

a woman with a cloak and she's keeping her hood up.

1:10:52

And just as she sidles out, she's

1:10:55

just going to look over to Cornelius and

1:10:57

she's just going to say, Bag shop. One

1:10:59

question. Do you have

1:11:01

our money? Are you going to have our money by the

1:11:03

end of the day? No, no, no, no, no. He's

1:11:08

looking at you, Kazimir. You're so confident.

1:11:10

Of course he is. Look at this fine house. Look

1:11:12

at all these fine people with

1:11:15

their checkbooks and

1:11:17

their bank accounts and

1:11:20

their small chain of... Travelers checks. Here

1:11:25

that way, Yozi. Don't worry. I'm here to

1:11:27

see to that. She lets her

1:11:29

stare linger on Cornelius for a

1:11:31

moment later and then she also

1:11:34

saunters out towards the garden and

1:11:36

people start taking their places. When

1:11:38

everyone is out of the house, Cornelius slams

1:11:40

the shutters of the French window shut.

1:11:43

So you are now hidden from

1:11:45

the view of the garden and turns to you, Kazimir. Who

1:11:50

was that man? Is

1:11:53

he one of your gang? Yes,

1:11:55

he is. Right. I see. So

1:11:57

what are we going to do?

1:12:00

That's right, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's his first

1:12:02

job, he's a little bit nervous, that's why

1:12:04

he ran away. You know, he gets his

1:12:06

dicky tummy when he's nervous, you know. Oh.

1:12:08

Um, he didn't make a mess upstairs, did

1:12:10

he? No, that's entirely why he was

1:12:12

running out into the street. He

1:12:15

holds you in such high regard, and

1:12:17

he is eager to flee. Now,

1:12:19

what do you want me to do? Well, this

1:12:22

is the thing. We've decided to combine our

1:12:24

plans. We have managed to locate a very

1:12:26

large bell. It is hidden away, so don't

1:12:28

you worry about a thing. We've

1:12:31

got someone up there who's going to strike it when

1:12:33

the time is right. Oh, right, of course. It will

1:12:35

be just like somebody died in your

1:12:37

garden. Right. So what we're

1:12:39

going to do, this guy, fine

1:12:42

actor, we're going to get him in some of

1:12:44

your garb. If you've got

1:12:46

maybe eight to twelve pairs

1:12:48

of insoles, we'll need those, because he is lacking

1:12:50

a little bit of height on you, good sir.

1:12:53

That was my... He was to

1:12:55

play me in the role of the... Oh,

1:12:58

he still is. He's going to

1:13:00

go out there, my good friend. I see.

1:13:04

Then we shall pretend to kill

1:13:06

him. Right. Then bong, and in

1:13:08

the ensuing chaos, where did we say you

1:13:10

were going to be? Ah ha ha, yes.

1:13:15

By the front door, it really is

1:13:17

to be bundled into the cart. The

1:13:19

zip cart, that's right. Yes. And

1:13:22

then it's off to Gaddock, and away

1:13:24

you go, all right? Yes, yes. Gosh,

1:13:27

I'm rather nervous. I wonder if I

1:13:30

might be permitted a little drink. No.

1:13:39

Look, there's nothing against you. I'm

1:13:42

sure you are a man of

1:13:44

temperance in all things, except

1:13:46

obviously gambling. It's just

1:13:48

that when you've worked

1:13:50

with some of the people with whom I work, you

1:13:53

get a bit superstitious about letting people crack

1:13:56

into the top shelf too early on. Got it?

1:13:59

Yes. The I live over there is

1:14:01

the small chance that I would I

1:14:03

lose my head is almost as a

1:14:05

as a as as get your the

1:14:07

experts. Drosophila music.

1:14:10

I'm. right? Well

1:14:12

others I'll follow your lead. What have

1:14:14

you need just to say. I'm.

1:14:20

At this by I don't really know the zealots back

1:14:22

sir in the back of my head and as a

1:14:24

voices guy night. Portions.

1:14:27

Are have! We've got a. Lot.

1:14:30

Yeah, I guess I've made my way up the as

1:14:32

servants that ice. Incognito!

1:14:36

To the and uttered the. A

1:14:38

full we the holding. The. Theme song.

1:14:40

Yet beforehand The drawing room?

1:14:43

Okay, and. Thought the

1:14:45

as planned. Prices.

1:14:48

Is attempted escape and I'm

1:14:50

stuffing him into ah into

1:14:53

one a Cornelius Is Seats.

1:14:56

Is. He unconscious still keys. oh yeah,

1:14:58

fully and consistent. Aca yep, expanded

1:15:00

our. And. The and of Dad

1:15:02

did. And. I tied him

1:15:04

up properly this time i stuffing none

1:15:06

of us in i do said is

1:15:09

from tibet in into one of cooney

1:15:11

this is seats to kind of part

1:15:13

amount make him look bigger. A

1:15:16

nice and and then I made my way down

1:15:18

South downstairs. Or I'm where we do. What

1:15:20

do we do? a role for those? An assistant, For

1:15:23

the. Success of the

1:15:25

dressing table? Yeah, cause to

1:15:27

and push yourself? flush. Would

1:15:31

be nice to. Usual things.

1:15:34

Flashback: Thirty is is an

1:15:36

exceptionally fine mattress being there.

1:15:38

Sir Yes sir, No sir

1:15:40

feathers I yell Isps I

1:15:43

think we got everything. In

1:15:45

hands. To be honest, I suspect

1:15:47

it's to Tamera So corny a

1:15:50

seat or anything like that. And

1:15:52

concise. Yeah, I. Push

1:15:56

myself though, because it would be nice if

1:15:58

things went smoothly for a little while. So

1:16:02

I'm going to call that

1:16:04

a thinness, I don't know, sort of...

1:16:07

Quite fine to me. Fiddly isn't it? It's kind of

1:16:10

sort of tinker-y, maybe it's more of a tinker-y thing.

1:16:12

I mean, I've got no dots in either

1:16:14

so it's a

1:16:16

bit academic if you like. So

1:16:18

if you've got no dots and you're

1:16:20

pushing yourself, then take one

1:16:22

D and

1:16:25

also take two stress. And two stress.

1:16:27

Alright. Okay. That's a

1:16:29

three. Okay, that's

1:16:31

a failure. Cool. And

1:16:34

two stress. Rub it.

1:16:36

That's rough. That's a rough

1:16:38

game. Yeah, that's rough. Never

1:16:41

mind, it's fine. We will overcome,

1:16:43

we will prevail. Kazimir, what you

1:16:45

see is Zilla slightly out of

1:16:47

breath walking into the drawing

1:16:50

room where you and Cornelius are waiting. She's

1:16:53

holding your ne'er-do-well still by the

1:16:55

throat and he is just trailing

1:16:57

feathers. They are kind of, as

1:16:59

Zilla has lifted him, they

1:17:02

are just sort of starting to fall

1:17:04

out. So

1:17:07

you've got a ne'er-do-well

1:17:10

in Cornelius' clothes, the

1:17:13

buttons are sort of done up slightly askew, and

1:17:16

there's a tear in one of

1:17:18

the arms, but it's very baggy

1:17:21

on this criminal. Not

1:17:24

my best work. No, we can work with

1:17:26

this. We can work with this. Think,

1:17:28

think. They're all in the garden,

1:17:30

right? Yep. Right. Get every

1:17:33

light on in the house. Get this guy a

1:17:35

lantern. He steps out. They're

1:17:37

all dazzled. They can't see him clearly.

1:17:39

He's just a silhouette. Okay. Yeah.

1:17:45

Go. I'm going to take a box of load and

1:17:47

produce a lantern. Yep, that's fine. Go. Like

1:17:51

a big proper, like, big, yeah, dorm

1:17:54

lantern. You took it off of a

1:17:56

whaling ship. It's supposed

1:17:58

to signal to shore. It's enormously

1:18:01

heavy but I apologize to Zilla

1:18:03

again for bringing so

1:18:05

much trouble to the docks at first. Oh,

1:18:07

it's poor! I

1:18:09

cannot say conclusively that I did not take

1:18:11

this from somebody you care about, but if

1:18:14

it happens that I did,

1:18:16

I will return it, I will apologize

1:18:18

and I will buy them a

1:18:21

month's supply of oil. Fair. Fair.

1:18:23

Okay. Great. Alright. Yes.

1:18:26

Now let's just kill this unsuspecting criminal. Yes! Cool.

1:18:31

So remind me what's happening with the

1:18:33

lantern, Kazenia. Remind me of the plan.

1:18:36

So we're gonna... the idea is we

1:18:39

want, you know, our mark to

1:18:41

appear holding the lantern up. Wait

1:18:43

a minute. No, the lantern needs to be behind him. He

1:18:46

needs to be silhouetted. Oh, yeah.

1:18:48

Well, one of us positioned

1:18:50

the lantern behind. That's how the

1:18:52

lantern works. Yeah. It's a silhouette

1:18:54

of him. And then... so

1:18:56

maybe we should turn all the lights off. Yep.

1:18:59

That's fine. Yeah. Yeah. I'm freaking out. What kind

1:19:01

of day do you want it to be? Yeah,

1:19:03

what kind of day is it? Bloomly dark. Up

1:19:05

the yard. Getting darker. It's dark. It's

1:19:07

dark. Okay. It's dark. Yeah.

1:19:09

It's only early evening but it gets dark

1:19:11

quick. Dusky. Okay, cool. The

1:19:14

hour of change, perhaps. No

1:19:16

one ever remembers which one's it. Yeah, it could be.

1:19:18

It's definitely the hour of change. Why not? Yeah. We're

1:19:22

going to poorly lit Cornelius as he

1:19:24

steps out onto the French window sort of

1:19:27

area. And silhouetted

1:19:29

him, in fact, with a lantern. And

1:19:33

then I presume almost immediately detonate him.

1:19:38

I'm going to go and vomit him. Yeah. Yeah.

1:19:42

As you're formulating this plan, there's

1:19:44

a kind of knock on

1:19:46

the door from outside from the garden. Oh, okay. I'll

1:19:49

go and answer the door as an

1:19:51

auction assistant. Yeah. It's

1:19:53

one of the estate agency looking

1:19:56

types. Yes, hello. Excuse

1:19:58

me. Yes. Oh

1:20:00

am I a given to believe

1:20:02

Mister Mister Cornelius you there. For.

1:20:05

Their what do you mean either alone is

1:20:07

preparing for the auction. Rights.

1:20:10

The. Guy ah of my am I right

1:20:12

in thinking that the this property is is

1:20:14

is is the thing that is that in

1:20:17

fact up for auction Everything that Brooks and

1:20:19

that especially this property I see and is

1:20:21

the reason we're not allowed to walk around

1:20:23

this. I really would like to work or

1:20:25

take some measurements see the state of the

1:20:28

Us. At.

1:20:32

Thrive but I but I haven't seen it is

1:20:34

the i think. It's

1:20:36

a side of fries sir. I heard from

1:20:39

across the room. View

1:20:41

on. Is how someone else who bet on this house

1:20:43

you know what felt that he is like around is.

1:20:47

A strange ways around it. Orcs and know I'm.

1:20:49

Mouth. Six hundred Social atmosphere job.

1:20:52

Air what are you by the ask their

1:20:54

dogs know of yourself if you're so case

1:20:56

it's a host and so as not been

1:20:59

a movie. Rights.

1:21:04

Like a few urlacher and. Sweet.

1:21:07

And will I? Ah, God.

1:21:09

I love. These

1:21:13

documents I'd like to say

1:21:16

the I had a rifle

1:21:18

through our Cornelius Is affects

1:21:20

earlier. And I've taken blueprints

1:21:22

of the house. Yep! Yep, that's

1:21:24

going on to push into his chest. So

1:21:26

yeah so grab their birthright sterile the blueprints

1:21:29

of the house as conceal the particulars. Renard

1:21:31

survey was done not two years ago so

1:21:33

I believe I still valid civil the purpose

1:21:35

of this options and is my good friend

1:21:37

associate says if you don't want nails don't

1:21:40

been on it might push him out into

1:21:42

got a school and presumably desert adore. dramatic

1:21:44

door slamming and app that on the floor

1:21:46

was at Yes As you peek through the

1:21:49

kind of slots for the french windows you

1:21:51

can you can see that he sees taking

1:21:53

the. Blueprints back and nice. kind of like these

1:21:55

to put laid them out on the floor and

1:21:57

every one is kind of gathered round. conflict. Well,

1:22:01

most of them, some of them interest in

1:22:03

the floor plan. A few members of the

1:22:06

party yeah, I just saw have sat there

1:22:08

looking surly and looking extremely focused and intent

1:22:10

on the windows. And in fact I think

1:22:12

it's been long enough. You hear a shout

1:22:14

from the garden. It stays the early one

1:22:17

from before Cosmic huge. the south. Where's.

1:22:19

Our money back shop. I

1:22:23

think it's showtime. Make. Of Rice Mps

1:22:25

A. Or. I then. I'm.

1:22:28

Very. Well. What? What Am I do again? Stay.

1:22:31

By the front door of talking to Zola.

1:22:34

Oh. right? Sorry. A

1:22:36

new wanted a drink. If they

1:22:38

put down the decant a very

1:22:41

slowly and have assembled looking at

1:22:43

it's zenith I guess I would

1:22:45

let some. let's process. You

1:22:47

are. Asked. In

1:22:50

the photo, you're not upset that

1:22:53

he is unconscious. Yeah. Yeah.

1:22:55

Okay, I'm I've manhandling my resume.

1:22:57

The French windows, Minus ass

1:22:59

backwards with the arrive at rigged up

1:23:02

some sort of frame. Some.

1:23:04

Kind of frame from which we

1:23:06

can hang stay for some time.

1:23:08

I agree, I guess is sort

1:23:10

of puppetry rigging fast. Our eyes

1:23:12

set that aside to have flashbacks

1:23:14

and running os. I'm

1:23:17

doing some carpentry isn't and

1:23:19

I have erected a kind

1:23:21

of. Puppetry. Country.

1:23:24

Style it in the room ever with his

1:23:26

and it's a. Concealed

1:23:28

behind the curtain, concealed behind the

1:23:31

drapery. Thank you. Yes, that's fine,

1:23:33

too. Stressed. so that fine? yeah?

1:23:35

Give it may we. They got

1:23:38

the idea from one of the

1:23:40

bunnies. Hilarious stories about a weekend

1:23:42

devoted see once. Or

1:23:46

twice as bad as burn. It

1:23:48

is an absolute mad lad been

1:23:50

medically declared dead twice know knowing

1:23:53

since the such. Thoughts Yep,

1:23:55

That evening we will fail to

1:23:57

stick a coat hanger in our

1:23:59

friend. May we. Will

1:24:02

never know show. And hanging.

1:24:04

Hanging on that rail. Yes,

1:24:07

Oh yes of for for behind the

1:24:09

curtain you can have a wheel out

1:24:11

this as paralysis of and you fit

1:24:14

your daddy well into it. Comes

1:24:16

to yeah is there a kind of like

1:24:18

waving home? So of yeah why not. Yeah

1:24:20

Taken to stress or send a said school

1:24:22

I have for us to serve Macys Arms

1:24:25

Race school. Yes,

1:24:27

I am against up around as

1:24:29

I'm resembles. On profiteering him sort

1:24:31

of. Birmingham. Up. And.

1:24:34

Then. Again and that

1:24:36

we could get we should get Cornelius

1:24:38

to deny sort of for his voice

1:24:40

a little bit. Hello

1:24:44

good evening! Welcome friends to my. Is

1:24:46

I was needed scarcely cornelius so good.

1:24:48

lot of get you going to say

1:24:50

us to when on when we ready.

1:24:52

Oh my god I'll repeat after your

1:24:54

pizza. Me but loud projects. Successes

1:24:57

or I say we get

1:24:59

you, don't. Know

1:25:02

yet? What

1:25:04

is it? Looked like? Kansas is kind of. You know,

1:25:06

I was like bundles of dynamite. Kind of like that.

1:25:08

sort of. She. Bites just

1:25:10

sort of. Blacks. A

1:25:12

sort of in and like her. But. How modes.

1:25:15

Iron. Casing. The

1:25:17

typical cylinder with a big fees are

1:25:20

right. When. Harry Bomb like that's

1:25:22

how I knew it was cool. It's a

1:25:24

nice offer offer you the about it's great

1:25:26

famous quality score. Matte finish. you know like

1:25:28

you're the guy that with. Real.

1:25:31

Tip: Top quality bombs. I

1:25:33

suspect this morning also. ah, I'm desert use

1:25:36

the difference when I was standing in front

1:25:38

of a sort of on the ground floor

1:25:40

of the house because the garden is sort

1:25:42

of in the in a split level of

1:25:45

by doesn't he yells adults There's a kind

1:25:47

of some. Kind of. Trap.

1:25:49

Door into the basement so in

1:25:52

a. It like us on coal. The

1:25:54

exactly physical seller lists and as he

1:25:56

the calls settler. Yeah, and it's got

1:25:58

a very sturdy. trapdoor on it

1:26:01

that I have inspected and gauge

1:26:04

to be potentially bomb proof because

1:26:07

we're going to need somewhere to retreat

1:26:09

to when the bomb goes off.

1:26:11

Yes, yes. So,

1:26:15

cool, just one stress for that I think.

1:26:17

Yeah, it's just me looking at a trapdoor

1:26:19

basically going well that's useful, I'm glad that's

1:26:22

theirs. Maybe if you timbers to reinforce

1:26:24

it. Okay great, and this lantern is part of

1:26:26

the... is being

1:26:28

fastened behind the... behind the

1:26:30

puppetry apparatus. Yeah, okay. It's

1:26:33

all part of the plan, it's been hard

1:26:35

at work. Okay, the... I've been admiring a

1:26:37

bomb. The folks in the garden, here's what

1:26:40

they see, the shutters are

1:26:44

closed and it's been a

1:26:46

few minutes but suddenly through the kind

1:26:48

of tiny gaps, a bright

1:26:51

light kind

1:26:53

of filters out, they can see something very bright is happening

1:26:55

in there and they're sort of turning to each other and

1:26:57

going is

1:27:00

this is normal? Normally

1:27:03

someone would just come out and read the year the house

1:27:05

was built and a

1:27:07

starting price for the bidding but

1:27:11

then they are interrupted by... Okay, yeah

1:27:14

we pull the shutters wide open. I

1:27:16

like that. The light is on latch.

1:27:18

This is a very

1:27:21

extra auction. The kind of, you know,

1:27:24

you know in movies when an alien walks

1:27:26

out of their spaceship and you can't yet

1:27:28

discern the shape of the alien. Yeah, they're

1:27:30

dazzled by this wailing lamp. So it's just

1:27:33

a... it is a thin, a very slim

1:27:35

and indistinct outline of

1:27:37

Cornelius of a figure just sort

1:27:39

of... And then a quavering voice

1:27:42

that may or may not be coming from roughly

1:27:44

the direction of the waving

1:27:46

man. Yeah, and... Yeah,

1:27:48

good evening friends. Good

1:27:51

evening friends. Welcome to

1:27:53

the auction of my estate, me,

1:27:56

Cornelius Bagshot. Welcome to the auction of

1:27:58

my estate, me, Cornelius. Cornelius

1:28:00

Bagshot. Um, ahem. It

1:28:05

was a giant chat. Say it. Okay,

1:28:08

um, and, uh, bidding will begin shortly. Bidding

1:28:11

will begin, uh, shortly. Okay. Alright,

1:28:14

then, then I make the kind of go go go gesture to Cornelius. Cause he better

1:28:16

run to the front door, then. Yeah, I'm

1:28:19

gonna do it. Okay. Okay.

1:28:24

Okay. Okay.

1:28:28

Cause he better run to the front door, like we

1:28:30

said, like we planned, Cornelius. I

1:28:34

think it's bum time. Yeah. Oh,

1:28:38

it's gonna go so well. Yes, so,

1:28:41

Kazimir and Zilla, you're kind of lighting the

1:28:43

fuse on this bomb and then scurrying downstairs,

1:28:45

right? Yep. Cool. Okay.

1:28:48

Yeah, just diving for the coal cellar. As

1:28:51

we've established, the

1:28:53

bomb does not function exactly

1:28:56

as Kazimir expects it will. It

1:28:58

is not so much of a sort of loud,

1:29:02

explodey, kind

1:29:05

of bomb, as it is a kind of, it

1:29:08

just sort of coats the room in white hot flame. Oh, no! It's

1:29:13

a kind of sprays. Oh,

1:29:15

no! I'll tell you what

1:29:17

it is, it's a firework. You've been sold a firework.

1:29:20

Oh, no. Like a

1:29:22

Roman candle. Okay. And

1:29:25

like that, immediately the curtains and the drapes

1:29:27

and the carpet and the upholstery go up,

1:29:30

the fire starts to creep

1:29:33

up the walls, everyone in the garden is

1:29:35

alarmed and they get

1:29:37

out of their seats and taking a few steps back. And

1:29:40

it's not long before we start

1:29:42

to hear a screaming from someone

1:29:45

who's not unconscious anymore and

1:29:48

is now on fire and the screaming goes,

1:29:51

bloody hell! Get me out

1:29:53

of this contraption! Oh,

1:29:57

no. Nervously

1:30:01

you hear from the- Mr. Backshot,

1:30:03

are you quite alright? Come

1:30:06

out sir, come on! Some

1:30:08

of the- I guess there's a split of moralities

1:30:10

in the garden, you know, of

1:30:12

like different types of people. Some

1:30:15

are quite willing to just sort of

1:30:17

stand back and let this happen. There's

1:30:19

a small band of estate agents and

1:30:22

small band of auctioneers who are trying

1:30:24

to, you know, make a plan to

1:30:26

go in there and rescue him. Meanwhile

1:30:29

I guess you are downstairs in the

1:30:31

cellar. Yeah, well, yeah, yeah,

1:30:33

yeah, yeah. And what you can hear is the

1:30:35

screaming. Yes, the

1:30:37

screaming. That does not sound

1:30:40

good. Alright. I

1:30:43

crack the trapdoor just a

1:30:46

millimetre or two. Is it still

1:30:48

on fire out there? Yeah,

1:30:51

yeah, everything is still increasingly on fire. Of

1:30:53

course it bloody is. And when you peep

1:30:55

up you can see the kind of edge

1:30:57

of the French windows and you can see

1:31:00

your frame kind

1:31:03

of wiggling as

1:31:05

you're near do well. Oh lord. And

1:31:08

soon successfully tries to disentangle himself

1:31:10

from the on-fire apparators. Oh, okay,

1:31:13

okay. How on fire is he? His

1:31:16

clothes are on fire, he's still

1:31:18

very much alive and wriggling. Zilla.

1:31:22

Yes? Have you ever been in a

1:31:24

wagon, Chase? No, I haven't. Why?

1:31:26

Would you like to be? Yes. I

1:31:31

think it's time we book it. Oh

1:31:33

no. Yeah, yeah, alright, let's

1:31:35

go. Out the, um, out the, um,

1:31:38

yeah, the entrance to the coal, the coal

1:31:40

chute. Quick. Yeah, you sprint

1:31:43

towards the front of the house, I'm thinking

1:31:45

at this point, yeah, um, where Cornelius

1:31:47

is waiting. He sees

1:31:49

you and goes, um, was this... the

1:31:53

plan? Or... Yeah,

1:32:01

and you are into the wagon, I guess,

1:32:03

Kazimieri, you sort of doing a dramatic tap-tap

1:32:05

with the cane as a kind of go-go-go.

1:32:07

Oh, oh, have we, have we a driver?

1:32:10

Oh, well, whoa, whoa, whoa, hold up. No,

1:32:14

I think I love the idea of one of you

1:32:16

driving too much. I'm gonna, like, try and hold. Uh-huh.

1:32:20

Like, yeah, I mean, we can both be

1:32:22

upright, right? Probably? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,

1:32:24

yeah, yeah, yeah. Couldn't even get in there.

1:32:27

Okay. I'm gonna stick my leg out the sides, be like,

1:32:29

oh, god. So it's not, like,

1:32:31

cramped up in that tiny little seat, and

1:32:34

then just whap with the, with the reins,

1:32:36

like, full-on, like, pshh. That's great. As the

1:32:38

horses, uh, well,

1:32:40

not, sorry, not horses, of course, as the goats sort of

1:32:42

spit out the hay that they were eating and, and,

1:32:44

you know, nah, nah, nah, nah. Uh,

1:32:47

say, Grand Annoyed, you can hear shouts coming

1:32:49

from inside the house now. Mr. Bagshaw, are

1:32:52

you all right, Mr. Bagshaw? We'll have you down

1:32:55

from here, and my goodness, how did you attach

1:32:57

yourself to something? Uh, and it

1:32:59

scared me out of this bleeder diggin'. And,

1:33:01

uh, and then a voice that

1:33:04

you recognized, Kazimir, from before. Wait a minute,

1:33:06

this isn't Cornelia's. We've

1:33:08

been had! Well,

1:33:11

I think our Neddy Wells learned his lesson. And,

1:33:16

yeah, as your wagon, um, sort of,

1:33:19

uh, starts to move

1:33:21

away, two people

1:33:24

from the auction, uh, are gonna come skidding

1:33:26

out the front door. They

1:33:29

are the heavy, who you recognize

1:33:31

Kazimir is, uh, wearing the kind

1:33:33

of colors and clothing of

1:33:35

the crows gang, and there's the

1:33:37

woman with the hood, which you also recognize that

1:33:39

she's a member of the bill hook. Okay. Um,

1:33:42

you actually, you recognize her, you know

1:33:44

that her name is Ziggy, but she didn't

1:33:46

seem to recognize you, which is a little bit awkward. It

1:33:49

must have been one of those, like, parties where she

1:33:51

had more to drink than you, or something like that, I dunno.

1:33:55

Um, but in any case, they're coming screeching

1:33:57

around. She is going to draw an immediately-

1:34:00

level a crossbow I think and aim

1:34:02

it at... you're both driving?

1:34:05

Well, we're both on the driver's

1:34:08

bench. Yeah, she's gonna fire at

1:34:10

sort of centre mass. You see her draw the

1:34:12

crossbow so you have like a moment to think

1:34:15

and act. Is there any acting? I

1:34:18

don't have to be. I

1:34:21

mean... Ducking, I guess. You can

1:34:23

dive by crossbow if you're ducking the movie. Yeah,

1:34:25

no ducking sounds. Ducking sounds pretty good. Alright,

1:34:28

yeah. Maybe a roll for ducking. Okay.

1:34:31

I'm gonna call this finesse because one has to duck

1:34:33

at exactly the right moment, you know. And

1:34:36

I'm also gonna push myself. Yep. I

1:34:39

can... this seems like a good time to help

1:34:41

you for free. Yeah, it would

1:34:43

be actually. I'm very strict. And

1:34:45

in the game. So,

1:34:49

if we're calling it a finesse roll then yeah, I

1:34:51

could definitely use the help. I

1:34:53

mean, I'm finessing. Yeah. So

1:34:55

you can do... I mean, unless

1:34:57

it's a group roll. Is it a group action, Luke? I

1:35:00

don't know. Or are these separate rolls? It

1:35:02

can be. Group action if you'd

1:35:04

like to. Yeah, actually if we do that then I

1:35:07

can help you for free and then I'll take

1:35:09

stress if it goes badly. Oh, nice. Yeah, let's

1:35:11

just jointly duck in

1:35:13

this crossbow arrow. Yeah, okay. Six. Oh,

1:35:16

yeah. And a five. And

1:35:19

in the chasmine, what you do is you

1:35:21

just whip your cane out and just push

1:35:23

it down onto Zilla's shoulders to just kind

1:35:25

of duck her head slightly and

1:35:27

a bolt just whistles where

1:35:30

her head was moments ago and sticks

1:35:32

in some masonry. Meanwhile...

1:35:35

Okay. That's

1:35:38

a five. That's pretty good. Meanwhile, the

1:35:40

other heavy has made a running

1:35:42

jump and is currently clinging to the side

1:35:44

of your wagon and in fact is using

1:35:47

his large, powerful fists to just smash into

1:35:49

the door. He's trying to reach through and

1:35:51

grab what he can see inside is Mr

1:35:53

Cornelius. Oh, yeah. Okay, cool. All

1:35:57

right. Well, with them... As

1:36:00

I'm here on the reins, I clamber around,

1:36:03

backwards, towards

1:36:06

the heavy, clinging onto the side of the cart.

1:36:09

Where are we? Are we at speed now? We're going... You're

1:36:11

at speed, yeah. You're now up to speed, yeah. Okay, cool,

1:36:13

cool, cool. And we're just on the streets. Just on the

1:36:15

streets of the street. You're on the streets, yeah.

1:36:18

It's a nice part of town, so people going

1:36:20

about their evening in their finery are diving out

1:36:22

the way. Okay. Okay,

1:36:24

cool. So, backwards, over the

1:36:26

cart, and I grab the

1:36:28

dude by both arms and just sort of

1:36:30

clamp them down onto the roof

1:36:32

of the... the roof on the side of the cart. And

1:36:35

then I yell to Kazimir to like, just

1:36:37

round the side of the street. Just

1:36:40

round the front. Oh,

1:36:42

we're going to... Yeah, we're just going to wipe

1:36:44

him off. We're going to brush him off. Yeah,

1:36:46

we're going to grind this guy off against a

1:36:48

wall somewhere. Just like that. Okay, fine. Yeah, that

1:36:50

sounds like another group action potentially. Yeah, I'm hitting

1:36:52

him by his arms. Cool. I'm

1:36:55

going to leave this one as little as I feel

1:36:57

like you've actually got the harder job. Okay, cool. Well

1:36:59

then, let's call it rec because it's a destructive action.

1:37:02

Great. I'm going to brush myself so

1:37:05

I can take... I die. Nice. So,

1:37:08

that is a five.

1:37:11

Cool, great, yeah. On

1:37:13

rec. Fantastic. You... you

1:37:16

pin his arm exactly

1:37:18

up land and... Oh, no. Roll the wall.

1:37:20

Oh, that's a bad one. Well, that means

1:37:22

extra stress for Zilla. It's

1:37:25

one stress for Zilla. Okay. Well,

1:37:28

I can take it, I think. Yeah, I do.

1:37:31

Yeah, I only just. Only

1:37:33

just. Okay. Yeah, um, Amir,

1:37:35

you... In a

1:37:37

slightly sort of jerky and not quite

1:37:39

as slick way as you would prefer,

1:37:41

you do manage to kind of pop

1:37:44

the cart into a Tokyo drift into a

1:37:47

sort of nearby alleyway. And,

1:37:50

Zilla, with your hands clamped onto him to the side

1:37:52

of the wagon, just... Like that into the side of

1:37:55

a brick wall. You hear a

1:37:57

thickening crunch? Yeah, he flattened. I really

1:37:59

feel... arms yeah you

1:38:01

really see you're still holding just the

1:38:03

arm yeah well he was ground

1:38:07

up against the wall yeah you

1:38:10

release the arm his crumpled form

1:38:12

kind of bounces back

1:38:15

I will make a fortune roll here that sounds

1:38:17

pretty painful but unless it's a one or two

1:38:19

let's say he's going to live like

1:38:23

three life-changing

1:38:27

injury yeah well

1:38:30

he knew the life um right

1:38:33

yeah and and with that you are

1:38:35

you are clean away you head up

1:38:37

to the train station get a grail station

1:38:41

okay where you interrogate Cornelius on the

1:38:43

way I mean not

1:38:45

interrogate but you know we

1:38:47

we somewhat held up our

1:38:49

end of the bargain I

1:38:51

mean actually we really didn't

1:38:54

well we'd you know what there's a very

1:38:56

clear way to tell and it's whether or

1:38:58

not I've taken level three curse damage for

1:39:00

breaking the oath that I signed oh

1:39:03

okay so yeah

1:39:06

I believe the verbiage

1:39:08

that you used was we will do

1:39:12

everything in our power

1:39:15

to to fake your

1:39:17

death and get

1:39:19

you out of volus port it

1:39:21

looks like you're about to successfully

1:39:24

accomplish part two clause two of

1:39:26

that contract I

1:39:28

am fully prepared at

1:39:31

this point to say that like we couldn't

1:39:33

be bothered to find a big bell and

1:39:35

we just decided to straight-up murder some dude

1:39:39

felt a lot to find

1:39:41

yeah oh we may have half-assed this

1:39:44

I am more than happy to take

1:39:46

level three harm curse at

1:39:50

the back of this I tell you what um I'm

1:39:52

gonna let's compromise because

1:39:54

I feel like half of the

1:39:57

bargain is still very much able to

1:39:59

be held up let's call it level two.

1:40:01

How does that manifest Kazimir in your... is

1:40:03

it painful? Oh

1:40:09

it's extremely painful. I feel like

1:40:11

the... basically the tattoo sort of...

1:40:13

basically catches fire and there's like

1:40:15

a purple like smoke that just

1:40:17

rises and I'm just being like... trying

1:40:21

to keep a lid on it while it burns

1:40:23

away from my skin. Kazimir

1:40:25

is close to presumably quite close to sort of

1:40:27

passing out with the pain but

1:40:29

you... as the

1:40:31

carriage comes to a stop outside the train

1:40:34

station, Cornelius pokes his head out the smashed

1:40:36

window. The door, in fact the

1:40:38

whole side of the wagon just falls

1:40:41

onto the street and he pokes his little

1:40:43

head out. Excuse

1:40:45

me, my hand thingy's gone.

1:40:49

Does that mean the plan worked? To

1:40:52

an extent, if you could please just get on the

1:40:54

train, that'd be lovely. Oh wait, Cornelius, before you go,

1:40:56

what was... tell us about your mystery

1:40:58

clients. What was the single letter that

1:41:00

the lady you worked for, the go-between?

1:41:03

Quick, Cornelius, the train's leaving. Here

1:41:06

we stand. We're running alongside it. Cornelius

1:41:10

will never forget you. Tell us. Leaving

1:41:13

a hand-keep. The train is

1:41:15

just starting to... Like

1:41:18

that, but yeah, and you've just sort of

1:41:20

put him up onto the step. So

1:41:24

this is really, then, a new life for me.

1:41:26

My death is fate, they won't follow me. No,

1:41:28

hurry. Yeah, details. Then who, then? I must hold

1:41:30

up my end of the bargain, of course. I

1:41:34

can tell you this. And I'm

1:41:36

afraid I wish it was more, but all I can tell you

1:41:38

is this. Please do. Mostly,

1:41:41

I was just doing the books for them, you understand. Just

1:41:43

the books. Anonymised. The books.

1:41:45

The train's going very fast now, Cornelius.

1:41:49

Yeah, at this point, Kazimir, you

1:41:52

just sort of, with pain, I suppose, just

1:41:54

crumple on the platform. Oh no. But

1:41:56

you're more able to keep the train ourselves, boy.

1:42:00

Oh my leg. Smell it, could it?

1:42:02

Yes. But on one occasion,

1:42:04

on only one occasion, they

1:42:06

had me notarize a contract. They

1:42:09

must have been, had to do it

1:42:11

in a hurry and had nowhere else to turn.

1:42:13

But the contract, of course, has a little more

1:42:15

information than you would normally have. And on the

1:42:17

contract, the signees were the... Let

1:42:20

me get this right. The Brightstone

1:42:22

Society for Analytical Alchemistry

1:42:26

and Amadeus Astor. They

1:42:28

were the two cosignees on the contract. It

1:42:30

was some kind of construction work, something large.

1:42:33

Maintenance on something large and that's all I

1:42:35

can tell you. Goodbye forever! And

1:42:38

he goes off to begin what he thinks will be

1:42:40

a new life. Oh

1:42:43

well, I mean, except no one thinks he's actually

1:42:46

dead. Except no one actually

1:42:48

thinks he's dead. I respect the cabinet who's like

1:42:50

crumpled up on the train tracks. But he believes

1:42:52

his death was faked. So in a way... Oh

1:42:55

yeah, he does! Yeah. Yeah, he does. So...

1:42:59

ignorance is bliss. I ticked a box of

1:43:01

load for a fine bottle of whisky which

1:43:03

I am now powering through. Oh, okay. I'm

1:43:05

just going to wordlessly hold it up for

1:43:07

Zillicitation. I take it and then we get

1:43:09

from the ground. I take it

1:43:12

and then I shoulder Kazmir onto

1:43:14

one shoulder and then we sort of limp

1:43:16

back towards town. Yeah, as you

1:43:18

limp back towards town, you

1:43:21

pass a street market where a stall is

1:43:25

having a clearance sale of

1:43:27

very large bells. He

1:43:29

passed it! These

1:43:31

large bells must go for free! It's

1:43:34

nearly the end of the day and I haven't... We

1:43:36

say nothing! Yes! You

1:43:39

can share a

1:43:41

look! Brilliant! And

1:43:43

we'll draw a

1:43:45

close air because yes, we've found a

1:43:47

little bit of crucial information. That

1:43:51

was amazing! Oh no! Oh,

1:43:53

that was so much fun. We very

1:43:55

nearly went full dark side there. Awwww!

1:43:58

Well, you know what? the end

1:44:00

yes I despite all

1:44:02

your attempts you didn't

1:44:05

actually kill anyone anyone that's someone

1:44:07

on fire and horribly injured someone

1:44:09

any people yeah and then you've

1:44:12

got smoke inhalation from the from

1:44:14

the helpers yeah look for the helpers you know

1:44:19

let's quickly do heat then shall we oh

1:44:21

yeah yeah let's do that oh

1:44:23

yeah now okay heat

1:44:26