0:10

Warning. The following episode contains adult

0:12

language, discussion of miracles, arranged marriages,

0:14

Channing Tatum, and disclosure of at least one

0:16

Bible approved stoning. Sensitive

0:18

listeners take cares.

0:36

So here's the confession I'm gonna make right at

0:38

the top of the show. I don't

0:40

believe in astrology, but astrology

0:43

keeps happening to me. Now.

0:45

Everyone says podcasting is the most

0:48

visual medium, So I

0:50

made you a slide show to try to explain. This

0:53

is the real skyline drive. It's

0:56

in Delaware, and growing up when

0:58

I couldn't sleep, it's one of the any

1:00

places I would drive to look at the stars. This

1:03

is the moon. It rules our emotions.

1:06

This is mercury in retrograde. You know

1:08

it because it makes life miserable. This

1:11

is Rahu and Kaithu. They're important

1:13

and mischievous nodes in Bathic astrology.

1:16

They're prominent in Donald Trump's horoscope, and

1:18

they're also responsible for Paris Hilton. This

1:22

is me. I was born May first nine.

1:26

This is the sky at the time I was born. In

1:28

Western astrology, it makes me a Taurus.

1:31

These are some other tourists pole Pod

1:34

I told a Comeni Saddam Hussein,

1:36

Adolph Hitler, Barbara Strice. Then

1:39

the fact that we're all tourises has made

1:41

me doubt astrology for a very long time.

1:44

These are my parents. They've been hitched fifty

1:46

one years and every morning my dad

1:49

makes my mom a cup of tea and then they sit

1:51

and do the spelling being pencil. It's

1:53

adorable, right. These

1:55

are my parents calling in the middle of this recording,

1:58

and I guess you. I think it goes for us climbing

2:00

back, give me a club. This

2:03

is India when I was growing up, where

2:05

it's like yoga and meditation and

2:07

turmeric and astrology. These

2:09

are words that were part of my Indian life, but

2:12

they weren't a part of my going to school fitting into

2:14

America one. But now now

2:16

everyone has an opinion about it. I'm

2:19

a Gemini, which I've heard is bad. I'm a Libra,

2:22

so I'm indecisive. That's definitely true.

2:26

I'm a tourist. I find it starts to be beautiful.

2:28

It sucks that we can't see you start in New York because all the lights.

2:30

I know a few people who are kind of into it,

2:33

and they're like, asked, yo, do you see the horoscope

2:35

today? And I'm like, nah, bro, not really,

2:37

I'm not worried about what the horoscope says. I know

2:39

a lot of people don't believe in it, but why

2:41

can't people just believe in things for fun, Like it doesn't

2:43

have to be backed up by anything. If you believe in

2:45

fantasy football, why can't you believe in astrology.

2:49

A few months ago, my friends and I sat out to make

2:51

this show about astrology. We wanted to run

2:53

around the city and have some wild adventures

2:55

and understand why after so

2:58

many millennia, people still looked the

3:00

sky for answers. This

3:02

is an astrologer I met in Queens. He

3:04

promised me, you're gonna dig this show. I

3:06

think if you do your own show will become

3:08

a super hit, no doubt about it. This

3:12

is a graph of how much I believe in astrology

3:15

before our session. Not that much.

3:18

This is a graph of how much I started believing thirty

3:20

minutes later when something horrible

3:22

he said came true. That's

3:25

why I asked again from the time he started

3:28

a couple of years back. Still now, the situation

3:30

doesn't look good. This

3:34

is me traveling halfway around the world to answer

3:36

the biggest question my entire life. This

3:39

is a shop in India where your fortune is waiting

3:41

for you. It was written centuries ago and

3:43

put on a shelf, and the shopkeepers know which

3:45

one to pull because it's coated by your thumb

3:47

print. And the time you're gonna walk through that

3:49

door. This, this

3:52

is me walking through that door on

3:57

Moneys Faticular from Kaleidoscope

3:59

and I Heart Radio. This

4:02

is Skyline Drive, chapter

4:38

one. Leave your acts at

4:40

home. So

4:46

I figured, you know, I do need to sown

4:49

an astrologer. And there are a bunch

4:51

of astrologers on the Upper West Side who

4:53

have set up with the wait. So you're

4:55

looking for an astrologer to sewn. Oh

4:58

yeah, well I

5:00

need to check it off the list I've

5:03

got you know already. This reporting

5:05

and starting off weirder than I thought. It's

5:07

ten o'clock on a bright summer day and I'm standing

5:09

here with A J. Jacobs. I am

5:11

an author and a journalist and a pisces.

5:15

In addition to being a pisces or technically

5:17

on the cusp of pisces and aries. J

5:20

is a friend and he's one of my favorite writers.

5:22

I've come to meet him in this neighborhood because in two

5:24

thousand seven he wrote a New York Times bestseller

5:27

called The Year of Living Biblically. The

5:29

book was a phenomenon. It came

5:31

out in multiple languages, there were magazine

5:34

and TV pieces about it. It was such

5:36

a big deal that at one point Marlon Waynes

5:38

was lined up to play a j in the Network

5:41

TV version. The premise

5:43

was that I would follow

5:45

all the rules of the Bible as literally

5:47

as possible, so that man the famous

5:50

ones like the Ten Commandments and love your neighbor,

5:52

but also the lesser known

5:54

ones like you cannot wear

5:57

clothes made of two different kinds of fabrics,

6:00

so I had to get rid of all of my polycotton blend.

6:03

Giving up polygon blends is just one of

6:05

the hardships Aga endured in the Navy journalism.

6:08

He also grew a massive beard, shoved

6:10

wild birds so he could steal its egg

6:12

and say a prayer on it. And he followed

6:14

seven hundred other Biblical rules

6:17

literally in an attempt to understand religion.

6:20

And somewhere along the way he decided that to

6:22

fully appreciate the Bible, you actually

6:24

had to stone people who

6:27

committed these abominations and the abominations

6:29

include adultery, breaking

6:32

the Sabbath, but also astrology,

6:35

witchcraft, divination, they're all sort

6:37

of lumped together. Just the fact

6:40

that he decided to stone someone was a

6:42

shock to me. I mean, Aj is

6:44

one of the nicest people I know, but

6:46

that's how committed he was. I

6:48

didn't want to go to jail for assault. I

6:51

just wanted to check it off my list, you

6:53

know, stone and astrologer check.

6:55

So I walked by this astrologer

6:58

on the street and just very subtly

7:01

dropped the pebble so

7:03

that it landed on her shoe, kind

7:06

of a drive by stoning. And

7:08

I was thinking, she's probably not

7:10

even gonna notice because I just kept walking.

7:13

Oh she noticed, and she's like,

7:16

what, what's going on? Why did you do that? And

7:19

so I had to tell the truth. Because I was

7:22

following the Bible. I thought maybe

7:24

she'll think it's funny. She did not think it's

7:26

funny. She was pissed. She

7:28

started yelling at me, like, f you

7:30

go to f and hell, I

7:32

was rattled. Even if you're trying to stone

7:34

someone in modern day using pebbles,

7:37

people don't like it. Well that's a lesson, that's

7:39

a takeaway rule

7:42

number one, don't stone an

7:44

astrologer. It wasn't the advice

7:46

I'd come for, but I wrote it down anyway.

7:49

But the thing I really wanted to know. The

7:51

reason I traveled all the way out here to

7:54

meet with a j was to ask him

7:56

how to make the show, because doing

7:58

the show in astrology it actually

8:00

makes me nervous, like, is

8:03

there a way to talk about how accurate

8:05

of fortune telling parrot could possibly

8:07

be? Or is there a way to joke about

8:10

whether an astro curse can make you

8:12

bald? Because even

8:14

if the show makes me look silly, like

8:17

I don't want to get disinvited from a family

8:19

wedding because I said something

8:21

that hurt friends or family or

8:24

really anyone who puts stock in these subjects.

8:27

As I'm trying to uncover threads and things

8:30

like how do you tell a story delicately where

8:32

you're not offending people but still engaging

8:34

with all the subject I had

8:36

that exact dilemma

8:38

when I was writing The Year of Living Biblically,

8:40

because I was coming

8:42

in as an agnostic writing about religion.

8:45

My big overall advice

8:48

is go in with deep

8:50

curiosity. Don't go in

8:52

with an agenda that you're trying to

8:54

disprove or prove astrology.

8:57

You're just an explorer, So

9:00

go in like with no ax

9:02

leave your axes at home. That

9:04

I think I can do. After

9:09

the break, we talked to an astrologer who doesn't believe

9:12

in astrology. Take a subway ride

9:14

to Queens and hear this from

9:16

my mom. I felt like a juicy

9:18

though. Chapter

9:38

two, just for funds is

9:42

the phone listening? Is that? Are you listening through the phone?

9:44

Pattern? AI? The algorithm? That is

9:46

the pattern? Back in one

9:48

of my friends shot me a text linking to this video

9:50

of Channing Tatum. The actor had

9:53

uploaded it himself after using an

9:55

astrology app called the Pattern, But

9:57

when Channing's readings became a little too spa

10:00

on, he freaked out, are you

10:02

listening through my phone? And then just regurgitating

10:04

the stuff that I'm afraid of? And stuff? You

10:06

know what? Pattern? People? You should

10:08

just call me. I need answers right now,

10:11

poor Channing. I don't know if he ever

10:13

got his answers, but what I do

10:15

know is that astrology is ubiquitous

10:18

and lucrative. One venture

10:21

capital investor told The New York Times that the app

10:23

co star this pattern competitor

10:26

had the potential to be a twenty four

10:28

billion dollar business, claiming

10:30

he could one day be as big as Spotify.

10:34

But if astrology is as big an opportunity

10:36

as everyone's saying, I'm wondering if

10:38

my company should get into the act. After

10:40

all, it feels so obvious that I

10:43

don't know even a nine year old could see the potential.

10:46

So I decided to try to pitch out on my nine year

10:48

old. Hey, why

10:50

you let me do this closet? I

10:54

brought you to this closet because I wanted to pitch you

10:56

on an astrology app? Are you ready

10:58

for it? The why

11:02

is that? What? What do you think about astrology? It's dumb?

11:04

Oh gosh, Well, maybe

11:07

you're not the right first of her. But the reason I came to you

11:09

is because you actually have a

11:11

bank. You spend only my money.

11:14

You seem to hoard all your money, and you

11:16

keep all of Henry's money as well, which you

11:18

charge them a small fee for. So I

11:20

thought you might be the savvaest person in this

11:22

family. Is it okay if I pick you an astrology app? Okay?

11:26

So here's my case for

11:28

it. These aren't your grandmother's horse ghosts

11:31

right there talking to you in this very

11:33

fresh and fun way. Uh,

11:35

they're up to the minute with the NASA

11:37

data. They look beautiful,

11:40

and they have a chat feature where

11:42

astrologers will chat with you live about your birth

11:44

charts. Right and then by two right,

11:47

like you can see astrology or starting to take over

11:49

um Bumble the dating app. They started allowing

11:52

you to sort your matches by their

11:54

birth signs, so like you could say, like I only

11:56

want to date Toruses or I only want to date Geminis

11:58

or whatever. In astrology

12:01

in two thousand nine was a two

12:03

point two billion dollar market.

12:05

What do you think about that? Mind,

12:12

I can't tell whether you're serious or not, but

12:15

but apps made forty million dollars

12:18

that year, and in fact, the next

12:20

year, when COVID really hit, people

12:22

started searching for birth charts and

12:25

astrology. Both of those searches

12:27

hit five year peaks on Google. So

12:29

it's no wonder that all these venture

12:31

capital funds had started investing

12:34

in astrology apps early and then continue

12:36

to invest um and I'm

12:38

here to ask you to invest in

12:41

my astrology app. What do you think I'm

12:45

spending my money on a skateboard

12:47

not on you. Okay,

12:49

Well, so Ruby, what type of business

12:52

would you invest in? Bub okay?

13:03

Chapter three, Truth and Poetry.

13:12

When you go out with the recorder in hand, it's

13:14

interesting to see who'll talk on tape. We

13:16

found scientists at NASA who actually wouldn't

13:18

talk about their interest in astrology to us because

13:21

they were afraid of losing their jobs. We

13:24

found PhDs and post docs who are worried

13:26

that if they talked at all to our podcasts,

13:29

even to say that astrology was nonsense, they

13:31

would face professional repercussions.

13:34

I mean, it is insanity what a

13:36

lightning rod astrology can be. But

13:39

luckily we found Jamie Green. My

13:42

grandfather showed me a little half

13:44

of a peanut that had the German it and he

13:46

said, that's going to become a plant. And

13:49

it was just things like that that got me interested

13:51

in the world, which is the same as being

13:54

interested in science. Jamie is a celebrated

13:56

science writer and I'm Sagittarius,

13:59

although you would not know it from looking

14:01

at anything about my life. I've

14:03

got some planet in Capricorn that

14:06

explains why I'm not an

14:08

impulsive adventurer. She

14:11

has a new book coming out called The possibility

14:13

of life, and she's co editor of the annual

14:15

Best American Science and Nature writing volumes,

14:18

And whether it's chatting about our garden or

14:20

the way we perceive constellations,

14:23

her capacity for wonder is incredible

14:27

and infectious. But perhaps

14:29

what I love most about Jamie was how

14:31

she clarified that science and astrology

14:34

don't actually have to be at odds with one another,

14:37

that we don't need science to disprove astrology.

14:41

Not that she thinks astrology is a science exactly

14:44

scientifically, in terms of astronomy,

14:47

astrology doesn't hold

14:50

a lot of meaning because it's all very human

14:52

centric. From the point of view of looking at the stars

14:54

from Earth, the stars are

14:57

light years apart. They have no

14:59

real relation to each other except in our minds.

15:02

But that relationship, the one

15:04

we make up while looking up at the stars, that

15:07

means something where it can

15:10

mean something if you wanted

15:12

to. It's like a much more

15:16

eloquent, poetic personal

15:18

fortune cookie. And I don't mean that disparagingly.

15:20

I just think that it's for you to take

15:22

from it what you need. And like we

15:24

don't think it's anti science to say a poem

15:27

is true. I think that's where science

15:29

gets defensive. Is

15:31

when people say that astrology as a science

15:33

and has physical roots

15:36

in the stars. It's like, oh, no it doesn't,

15:38

but it's true the way a poem is true. I

15:41

can't tell you how much I love that. I mean,

15:44

as someone who's a skeptic but also

15:46

a romantic, this idea that astrology

15:49

is true the same way a poem is

15:51

true. That feels right

15:53

to me, And it's something my

15:55

friend Pete also said when I talked to him.

15:58

Pete Steel is, well,

16:01

it's complicated. So like

16:03

even though I was like a semi successful

16:06

like musician, I was like, I

16:08

need to make money somehow, like

16:11

right now, Like what other skills do it happen? I do

16:13

astrology. He is

16:15

a rock star, like a real rock

16:18

star. He used to be in the Walkman, that

16:27

massive seminal Indie rock band,

16:29

and yes, his backup career

16:32

was professional astrology. When

16:34

he was younger, he trained with this big famous

16:37

guru. He was living in his guesthouse

16:39

and that's where he learned to read star charts.

16:42

You would take him back to him and he would say like, no,

16:45

it's the dumbest thing I've ever heard, Like you're wrong, you

16:47

know, and then he kind

16:49

of in very traditional

16:52

style like yell at the apprentice

16:54

sort of things right,

16:56

very very karate kid kind of feeling

16:59

right, said, here's

17:02

the other thing. Pete doesn't even believe

17:04

in astrology. He's a rock star

17:06

who does astrology for politicians and

17:09

World Bank economists and all

17:11

sorts of interesting folks, but

17:13

he doesn't believe in it. It's

17:15

this art to me, And I don't mean that dismissively,

17:17

like, but that's like my whole being, Like, that's what I

17:20

care about. What he believes really is

17:22

in a more vivid reality, a

17:24

kind of embroidered view of the world. Pete

17:27

and I both spent formative years in India,

17:30

and we have a certain comfort in the magical.

17:33

If you read like a hundred years of Solitude or something

17:35

like that, world of like this

17:37

kind of magical Columbia. You know, it's

17:39

like that felt very similar in

17:42

a lot of ways to how we were

17:44

raised. Magical

17:52

explanations have been woven throughout my

17:54

life, like why was

17:56

my family's little community in India so well

17:58

off a century ago? You

18:00

could say it's because of luck or global

18:03

economics. You could say it's

18:05

because when the Civil War was happening

18:07

in the US. England actually needed

18:09

more sources of cotton to replace

18:11

all the cotton that the US had been producing,

18:14

and my family they just happened to be

18:16

in the right place to manage mills and plant

18:19

cotton on their land. Or

18:21

you could tell the story in a way that's way,

18:23

way more magical, that

18:25

a great great ancestor had this powerful

18:28

vision from a goddess that if he chanted

18:30

a simple string of prayers every single

18:32

night, and he taught all his children

18:35

to sing it, and they taught all their

18:37

children, his people would

18:39

be protected for years. And

18:42

for most of my life, I

18:44

only knew that second story Champai

18:50

i Maslova mali

18:55

il ja

18:58

jacobam bam ba bye o't

19:00

yeah that pilot chapter

19:05

four, Mopeds and miniskirts.

19:10

Arranged marriage has always been this thing

19:12

that's hard for me to talk about. When

19:14

I first moved to Delaware, kids in my elementary

19:16

school had all these questions for me about

19:18

being Indian, right, like does your

19:20

family sleep on a bed of nails? Can

19:23

you charm snakes? Just you

19:25

know these things they've seen on cartoons? And

19:27

arranged marriage was just another one of

19:29

these questions I'd have to field, except

19:32

this one actually bothered me more

19:35

because this time I'd have to admit that, yes,

19:37

my parents did have an arranged marriage, and

19:40

then I'd have to explain that The

19:42

thing is, everyone assumed my mom and dad were like

19:45

forcibly paired off when they were nine years

19:47

old and then sent away to work and have kids,

19:50

and that isn't true. It's like my

19:52

parents situation was a little more

19:55

like pride and prejudice. Like,

20:00

you come from a good family, your parents want you to marry

20:03

into another good family, so they

20:05

set you up. They make introductions

20:08

to certain people, and if you like each

20:10

other, they kind of fast track the

20:12

marriage or they make

20:14

more introductions. But

20:16

since this was already super hard to explain,

20:18

I I just left out the part of astrology,

20:21

which also plays a big role in the

20:23

whole arranged marriage thing. It

20:26

was like, I don't know, just too difficult

20:29

or embarrassing something. After

20:32

all, it's it's a weird thing to have to admit you

20:34

only exist because of astrology. But

20:38

I'll let my mom explain. Tell

20:41

me about how your marriage was arranged.

20:43

Oh that's funny, okay,

20:48

Uh's aunt shouted the cup

20:51

she came to see Emma because she'd heard that,

20:53

you know, I was available. I guess

20:55

the story starts, of course, with two

20:58

families dusting off their kid's horse oaps

21:00

and handing them off to a trusted astrologer,

21:03

not some low level quack. So they

21:05

matched it, and it matched perfectly.

21:08

The traditional Indian matching system is way

21:10

more complicated than just saying is your scorpio?

21:13

A proper celestial marriage is supposed

21:15

to be a union of souls, so the astrologers

21:18

inspect all the vagaries of your chart and pressure

21:21

test everything like your personalities,

21:23

your feelings about class and status,

21:26

even how a couple's health will be affected

21:28

by one another. It's all on the

21:30

scale of thirty six points, and

21:32

any match under eighteen points shouldn't

21:35

be considered. But anything over thirty

21:37

two, that's something you want to lock down

21:39

immediately. My badness want to

21:41

make sure that the man and it did not

21:44

really let me, She asked the astrologer.

21:46

You know, how is this nature? So the

21:48

astrologer tourama, that was a gently

21:51

creature, you know. Nevertheless

21:53

system, but so this part is true.

21:56

I've only ever heard my dad yell a

21:59

handful of times, and most of that was

22:01

when our dog. Lupani would just race

22:04

out of the house and he would run after

22:06

her with this like slice of

22:08

craft singles cheese, just waving it

22:10

to try to tempt her back. And it

22:13

always worked because she was

22:15

super greedy. But one fault he'd

22:17

have has never come on time to the table to

22:19

have dinner. And we thought

22:21

it was a big joke and that came true. We couldn't

22:24

believe that astrology could be that powerful

22:28

to tell a quirk like that. Wasn't

22:30

there something else with the mother in law? The

22:33

mother law? Yes, they said that I would be

22:35

best for a boy that did not have a mother.

22:38

I really don't know. They said it was something to

22:40

do with the stars, and if

22:43

I had a mother in law it wouldn't go ahead. So

22:46

here who had lost his mother when he

22:48

was under a year. I think we just about

22:50

to you, so it was perfect. This

22:53

is something I think about a lot, how

22:56

astrology accounts for everything. My

22:59

dad had aya or a nanny,

23:01

but he never had a mother. His life

23:04

was a series of hostels and boarding schools,

23:07

sometimes in cities hundreds of miles from

23:09

his home. It makes me sad

23:11

to think about. But if his mom

23:14

had survived, my parents

23:16

would never have been together. Astrology

23:18

would have made sure of that. Anyway,

23:22

back to my mom, even though my grandmam

23:24

was working really hard to set her up, my

23:26

mom was not keen to get married. I

23:29

wasn't ready. I was still studying and

23:31

it was in my final year for master's studying

23:35

linguistics. I didn't want to give that up,

23:38

and I didn't want to get married that fast. So

23:41

I felt like a juicy cow. I

23:44

wasn't happy, and things

23:47

were really moving faster than they ever expected,

23:50

so I said, I'm going to foil this. So,

23:52

just to get the picture, a typical woman

23:55

hoping for a match would be waiting, sitting

23:58

by her parents, dressed in a sorry or

24:00

something traditional like making

24:02

a big show of what a quiet

24:05

and obedient wife they could be. And

24:07

instead had a miniskirton and

24:10

I had lambretta. I

24:12

wrote that and came, oh, and she's

24:14

also late, Like my mom is

24:16

the most punctual person I know. She

24:19

gets to the airport three hours ahead of time, and

24:21

that since I was a kid, so she's

24:23

clearly trying to tank this thing. And

24:27

my hair had let it loose and curly

24:30

wasn't done. But instead, you

24:32

know, said, Oh, that's

24:34

no problem. We love modern girls. What

24:36

type of woman do you think Mama was expecting

24:39

to present. She

24:42

wanted them to know that I was absolutely

24:44

sensitive and very loving, very

24:46

kind and gentle with everyone,

24:49

and animal lover. But my Grandmam

24:51

was also incredibly honest, so

24:54

she was sure to tell my dad's family this. I

24:56

had no interest in cooking anyway.

25:00

Despite my mom's lack of interest in the kitchen and

25:03

her dramatic attempt to topple

25:05

this whole affair, she somehow

25:08

still won my dad's family over. So

25:10

I must say, here's the deal. Let him

25:12

write to you. If you don't like him, it's fine.

25:15

He was a charming writer. He was a charming

25:17

writ So they wrote letters back

25:19

and forth for a year, and when they

25:21

finally met in person, you know, he looked

25:23

so vulnerable that they said, oh, this

25:25

is great. I can handle him. My

25:28

parents don't have a perfect marriage, but there

25:31

are lots of wonderful bits things

25:33

that make me think those thirty two points meeting.

25:35

Something like once when

25:37

they were young, they visited Paris, and

25:39

they went to dinner at this fancy restaurant

25:42

with a ballroom, and an orchestra

25:44

started playing, and no one was

25:46

dancing crickets. So

25:49

my dad just whisked my mom onto the dance

25:51

floor and then slowly everyone

25:54

in the place joins in. And when

25:56

my parents went back to their table, the band leader

25:58

had actually sent them this gorgeous spottle of

26:00

brandy to say thank you for livening the place

26:02

up, then forgetting everyone dancing.

26:05

I mean, if astrology can promise you

26:07

those sorts of scenes, it's like who

26:09

wouldn't listen? Of course,

26:11

astrology has done damage in the family too.

26:14

Here's my mom telling me about an arranged marriage

26:17

gone wrong. My cousin Nana. The

26:19

girl that they looked for the

26:22

horoscope matched with him. Who's your cousin,

26:24

Nana? Nana from Manglo Nalia,

26:27

So there was a danger of his brother dying

26:30

if the girl married Nana. The

26:32

strologers are predicted that if the couple went

26:34

through with the marriage, even though their

26:36

horoscopes matched, it could lead

26:39

to Nana's brother's death. I

26:41

mean, who wants that on their hands, even

26:44

if it's putting your chances for love at

26:46

risk. So to this day

26:48

he stood a bachelor. Really, what

26:52

do you think about that? It's

26:54

a shame. Yeah, they

26:57

could have found other girls. What he

26:59

just was dejected is normal goods,

27:02

normal horoscoptes sis. That's

27:04

heartbreaking and it really is. Yeah

27:14

Yeah. After

27:18

chatting with my mom, two things occurred to me. First,

27:21

the chasm between the way Americans and

27:24

Indians use astrology. That only

27:26

felt wider, like no app

27:28

was going to tell you to quit your NBA to marry

27:30

some guy in America, or to break

27:33

it off with this girl because it could bring bad

27:35

luck or death to another family member, like

27:38

the starkness of the way Indian astrology

27:40

can be used to control lives. It

27:42

felt so dark, but

27:45

also pretty intriguing, like

27:48

it only made me want to dig in more. And

27:51

the second thing I remembered is this piece

27:53

of advice A J gave me about

27:56

really embracing the show. I

27:58

think you gotta go all in, So you got

28:01

to hire an astrologer

28:04

to help you with the show. I figure

28:06

out when you should start, when should the

28:08

air date be, Who should you hire

28:10

to help you? Should there be a Virgo or a Capricorn,

28:14

like, go for it, because that's

28:16

one way to test it is to see does

28:19

it work for you? So I

28:21

decided to find an Indian astrologer and

28:23

solve both problems. I could

28:25

lean into my Indian side and also

28:28

have some fun with it. But what

28:30

I didn't know was that that visit

28:33

was going to change my life. M

28:37

h m

28:43

hmm. Chapter

28:50

five, We go to Queens. On

29:01

April nine, I headed to Kleeans to meet an astrologer.

29:04

He's someone my friend and showrunner for the show,

29:06

Mary recommended that I reached out to and

29:09

coincidentally, he happened to be an astrologer that

29:11

my cousin Aditya had used. Hey,

29:14

how that

29:17

is another rational type. He's kind

29:19

of this white shoe lawyer, masters from

29:21

Cambridge, and he used this astrologer in

29:24

a difficult time and apparently

29:26

the predictions had proven accurate. So I

29:28

just actually wanted to see him again. So

29:30

I took a train to Jackson Heights to meet Dr

29:32

Rocketsh. Kumar and we entered his white

29:34

wood frame office. From the outside, it's

29:37

kind of nondescripts like this row

29:39

house, but when you open the door, you

29:42

immediately sensed these temple like

29:45

vibes. So I took

29:47

off my shoes at the entrance, walked

29:49

through a fog of sweet sandalwood,

29:52

and there were these massive

29:54

photos of his guru on the wall. And

29:57

then I turned into this tiny room with a

30:00

desk and it had a giant stack of

30:02

books on it with a little black laptop

30:04

on top. Looking around,

30:07

I realized how fun this is. I'm

30:09

here on this field trip with my cousin, this astrology

30:12

adventure, and I'm so ready

30:15

to hear some ridiculous things and enjoy

30:17

this experience. Dr

30:22

Kamar very sweetly welcomes me in. He closes

30:25

his emails, and then, using the information

30:27

I sent him a few days before, he

30:29

pulls up my chart and turns on his

30:31

recorder. So I'm,

30:34

guys, looking at the chop me first before

30:38

in the afternoon in summer New Jersey. You're

30:40

born on a Tuesday. You

30:42

have the sign cancer rising. I've got to

30:45

say I was a little surprised by how quickly

30:47

Dr Kamar dives in. It seems

30:49

like he's just staring at a bunch of numbers on his screen,

30:52

but he's interpreting them, kind

30:54

of like Neo from the Matrix. And

30:56

I'm curious to hear my reading. But what I

30:58

really want to do is asked Dr

31:01

Khmar about the show. I thought

31:03

it'd be fun if there were these auspicious

31:05

dates for my podcast, or if you could predict

31:07

something about how many people would listen.

31:10

But first he had some questions

31:13

for me. So, how's what been

31:15

since January? Um,

31:19

that's when I decided

31:23

to quit my job, so

31:25

that you would have quit your job where the job would

31:27

have quit you one of the things. Because the

31:30

times of such, because it impacts

31:32

you, convercire, it's

31:34

so ironic. You come here today, who it is

31:37

from now? You put onwards.

31:39

Thereafter a new chapter of your

31:41

life begins, another beginning of

31:43

your life, which will be very good. This

31:46

is what I came for. I write down

31:48

April thirteenth in my notebook and I circle

31:51

it big. Four days from

31:53

now. That's the date I'm going to get

31:55

started on my show. Dr

31:58

Khmar continues with more work related things.

32:00

He says foreign travel is in the cards,

32:02

which is super exciting, and

32:05

that I should wear an emerald to improve my communication

32:08

skills, which is funny. I

32:10

make a note to do an episode on gems

32:12

and vedic astrology down the line. But

32:15

the best part is that Dr Khmar seems

32:17

to think this whole podcast will go really

32:20

well. So it's very profound.

32:22

So you'll make it big in life. You'll be very successful

32:25

in everything, because your planets show

32:27

that. I'm so excited about

32:29

all this tape, getting a start date for the show,

32:32

the talk of gems, this prediction that everything

32:35

might go well, that I'm

32:37

caught off guard by Dr Kamar's next

32:39

question, which comes out of nowhere, get

32:42

to be something about your father, um,

32:46

like what he did for work or it still does.

32:49

He's a chemical engineer, he's

32:52

retired, he's ill

32:55

right now listening back, I

32:57

don't know why I mentioned my dad was ill. Dr

33:00

Kamara hadn't asked, and maybe

33:02

it's because I was trying to participate fully, like

33:05

I thought I should let him know. Years

33:08

ago my dad was diagnosed with cancer,

33:11

but he actually sailed through that treatment

33:14

and he's been cancer free for a while now. But

33:17

recently he broke a rib reaching for something,

33:20

which was odd, and then

33:22

he also had the slight boost and some liver counts

33:25

which his doctor told him not to worry about.

33:27

Because that's why I asked again

33:30

from the time he started a couple of years back. Still

33:32

now, Uh, situation

33:34

doesn't look good for father. There is

33:37

a risk to father. This thing

33:39

about my dad. It was a throwaway

33:41

line in the middle of an hour and a half interview.

33:44

I don't even know how closely I was listening.

33:47

By the time we hit stop on the recorder, I was thrilled.

33:50

I had over an hour of material and I

33:52

was cutting tape my head as I was asking

33:54

questions, and I know I felt good.

33:57

I thanked Dr Khmar for his time, and I

33:59

let him run off to feed his mother lunch, which

34:02

he does every day, and my cousin

34:04

and I walked off to get fresh dosas and Italy's

34:06

that one of the many canteens that dot

34:09

this area of Jackson Heights. I

34:13

try to thank you, and

34:18

then twenty minutes into chatting

34:20

and laughing and debating what's

34:22

real about astrology and what isn't and

34:25

how can you even tell right? I

34:28

received this email from my dad. It

34:31

read we just received the results

34:34

of the MRCP testing. Unfortunately,

34:37

the news is not as good as it could be. We'll

34:40

talk to Dr Thomas and Dr Shakour

34:42

and let you know as soon as we can. Study

34:46

result diffuse metastatic

34:49

disease throughout the liver and bones

34:51

from unknown primary. The

34:56

cancer had metastasized through my dad's liver

34:58

and bones. I don't

35:00

know what it means, but I've forgotten

35:03

about astrology. I

35:05

don't care about emeralds or whether

35:08

any of this feels embarrassing anymore. My

35:11

stomach drops. I can't

35:13

finish my chie I

35:16

don't know what to write, so I just tap out.

35:19

I'm so sorry, Dad, I'll call

35:21

you back in a bit. And

35:24

all I'm thinking now is

35:27

how fast can I get to Atlanta next

35:51

week? On Skyline Drive, we take a train to Bay

35:53

Ridge, meet a therapist who secretly

35:55

uses astrology behind your clients backs,

35:58

and hang out with a seventy four year old

36:01

who just wants to know am I ever

36:03

going to have sex with somebody again?

36:06

And we use astrology to get her an answer.

36:14

Thank you so much for listening. I

36:16

have so many people to thank. Skyline Drive

36:18

is a production of Kaleidoscope and I Heart

36:21

Podcast. The show is hosted and written

36:23

by Me Mongish Fatigular with a

36:25

ton of help, like so much

36:27

help from these wonderful people. Mary

36:30

Philip Sandy is our cat loving supervising

36:32

producer Metra Bunshah. He produced

36:35

this whole thing despite my constantly

36:37

getting in the way. Mark Ltto is

36:39

our incredible story editor who

36:41

even suffered a trip to India with me. This

36:44

episode was mixed by my pal at Soundboard,

36:46

with scoring from Botany. The

36:49

song Yola Mango is my absolute

36:51

favorite um the insane music

36:53

in between is courtesy of Azadi Records,

36:56

him Manchu Suri and Peter Matthew

36:58

Bauer. If you want to hear more, we made

37:00

you a mixtape, just check out the show

37:03

notes. Additional production and research

37:05

support from the wonderful Anna Rubinova

37:07

through Chivrao Lucas, Riley,

37:10

Bethan Macaluzo, a bitya

37:12

bus thrower, and my wonderful wife

37:15

Lizzie Jacobs. There's also my superstar

37:17

Aunt Summon, the Woman Buckshee

37:20

and my cousin Argent Buccy, who helped

37:22

me out of a giant pinch abroad.

37:25

The show is executive produced from I harp On, my

37:27

good pals Nicky Etur and Katrina

37:30

Norvelle. This show would not have happened

37:32

without the support of my friends at Kaleidoscope,

37:34

starting with my good pal Oswalsian,

37:37

who believed in this show. He's also my partner

37:39

at Kaleidoscope. Also Kate Osborne

37:42

for her spot on notes cost Us

37:44

Lenos for his encouragement and Fahini

37:46

Shory for her delightful

37:48

suggestions. I also want to give a little

37:50

special thanks to all the kiddos who bore with

37:53

us through this production, Henry Ruby,

37:55

Julian Grendel, Lou and little

37:57

Enzo Etur. All my friends

37:59

I heart, including Bob Connall will carry

38:02

Nathan Jason, Jerry, my New

38:04

York and Atlanta Cruz. There are

38:06

too many to name. Also

38:08

Chant and Sarab, my family in India,

38:10

my family in the States, my friend Noel Brown

38:13

who read this episodes warning

38:15

check out his show's ridiculous history

38:17

and stuff they don't want you to know. And just

38:20

one last thank you to my Amma

38:22

and my dad is Lolita and Amir

38:25

Fatiguler, who I thank

38:27

my lucky stars for thank

38:29

you so much for listening. Dum

38:35

dum dum dum dim dom

38:38

dum dum dm dum dum dim

38:40

DoD