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CMXXVI. Pedofire (Maddy Smith And Boris Khaykin)

CMXXVI. Pedofire (Maddy Smith And Boris Khaykin)

Released Saturday, 3rd December 2022
Good episode? Give it some love!
CMXXVI. Pedofire (Maddy Smith And Boris Khaykin)

CMXXVI. Pedofire (Maddy Smith And Boris Khaykin)

CMXXVI. Pedofire (Maddy Smith And Boris Khaykin)

CMXXVI. Pedofire (Maddy Smith And Boris Khaykin)

Saturday, 3rd December 2022
Good episode? Give it some love!
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Episode Transcript

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1:00

Fill her up. You're

1:03

listening to the Cash Digital Network.

1:13

Well, I'm on the fuckers. It's the real ass

1:15

podcast. Agent boy Luis Shea Gomez.

1:17

Working right on paper last dude, ultimate minority,

1:19

joined get up comedy. I got a lot of names. International

1:22

superstores to Amico. I don't buddy. He's

1:24

funny. He's a psycho. You know, we don't have to

1:26

do it. I would double teaming this chick with her husband.

1:28

Now he's selling Coke in heaven. Are you fucking

1:31

Maddy? motherfuckers. It's the only

1:33

real podcast left out there. That

1:44

is an article from the future. We're

1:47

time traveling here, folks. You'll see.

1:50

You'll see. Welcome to the Real

1:52

Last podcast. It's Jabol and Luis Shea Gomez

1:54

Puerto Rican rhinos like king of things, playing card of podcasting.

1:56

The I

1:59

wasn't a real estate.

1:59

It's myself. It's me. That's me.

2:02

The namesake of this podcast, you know.

2:04

With me as always, my cohost,

2:07

my partner in crime, the man that meets the legend,

2:09

the truly living legend. For

2:11

now, Zac, the barely living

2:13

legend. Zac Amico.

2:15

Hello. Hello. Good morning, everybody. What's up, buddy?

2:18

How you doing, man? chilling man. I'm very

2:20

excited to have our guests on today's show, but

2:22

I like I like both these guys a lot, actually.

2:24

actually. Shannon finally did a good job this

2:26

week, a booking guest that I like across

2:29

the board. Usually, there's a there's a

2:31

character or two where I'm like, okay, Shannon

2:33

enough. We won't name names, but

2:35

you guys can you know, in the comments, let

2:37

me know who you've had enough of

2:39

on this show. They're just gonna say you.

2:41

No. they want No. There's warnings when when

2:44

I walk in. I'm like, oh, this is gonna be work.

2:46

Yeah. Totally. Ladies and gentlemen, you know

2:48

where you have or Maddie Smith is back on

2:50

the show. It's not a really girl.

2:52

Are you guys doing? People love me.

2:55

People love you on the show. I love you. A lot of comments

2:57

I saw on you. Yeah.

2:57

Last time we had some deep fakes of

3:00

my titties.

3:00

Oh, yeah. They're gonna be in there today. Don't you worry

3:02

about that? This gonna all be popping up very, very

3:04

soon. Also, ladies and gentlemen, I'm

3:06

gonna say Khaykin because I like pronouncing it

3:08

that way, but I know it's Kaikin. Ladies

3:11

and gentlemen, Boris Kaikin is back on

3:13

the bottom. You know, I want to fake some detainees

3:15

in those comments. too. Please. I would love

3:17

to see them. Race's live chat. Get at it.

3:19

If you guys are watching live on the gastro digital network,

3:21

you can also join the racist live chat

3:23

and unlock thousands of hours

3:25

of episodes of this podcast

3:27

and Legion of Skang's acting week midnight spook

3:30

show, Maddy I

3:32

mean, how many fucking amazing shows we have in this

3:34

network. You just go to Gastision

3:36

Network dot com, use the promo code,

3:38

RAP, get a seven day free trial, get instant

3:40

access to the On Demand library for all of these shows.

3:42

I think it's nine bucks a month or like nine fifty

3:45

a month. It is the best fucking value in the

3:47

world. There are thousands of hours of

3:49

content that are just completely unavailable

3:52

anywhere else. It really is a great deal.

3:54

Support us, that is the number one way that

3:56

you can support this show and she could support

3:58

me. But let's do plugs real

4:00

quick. Let's get them out of the way. Let's start our

4:02

show. I'm I'm pulling up the racist live chat right now.

4:04

because I'm interacting with the racist live chat

4:06

as much as possible today. Let it be known.

4:08

Let it be known.

4:09

I respect them. You

4:11

should tell me too. Maddy, what what's your plug

4:13

in?

4:13

Dude, you guys. I'm gonna be in Wilmington

4:16

at North Carolina this weekend. Dead

4:18

crew. Dead Jim Crow. No. I'm

4:20

saying.

4:21

Let's for Zach. Next

4:23

weekend. Dolby. Slow

4:27

morning for me. Okay. So

4:29

Amico, son -- Hell

4:31

yeah. -- in in two weekends from there,

4:34

twenty twenty three, we hit in DC

4:36

improv, Austin,

4:37

Capcity. Thank

4:40

you. You don't pull up my

4:41

website, Maddy smith comedy dot com.

4:44

True Plus, Wilding out,

4:46

MTV. Turn on for what?

4:48

because I'm still on it. I the only this

4:50

one is I watch your clips and I enjoy

4:52

it. I can never bring myself to watching

4:54

the show iconic. I'm not a fucking teenage

4:57

boy. Okay? Yeah. But I do watch

4:59

Eclipse and I do enjoy what I see of

5:01

the show. It right. because

5:03

Actually, what message? because you were saying

5:05

it's funny. It's it's stupid.

5:07

It's funny in a way that, like, roast roast

5:09

will always be funny. You know what I mean? Well, there's the elements

5:11

of Rose battle. There's a couple of exactly. No.

5:14

No. No. No. because I do Rose too. It's funny in that way.

5:16

He's just like III completely agree.

5:19

Those lines anyway for black people. Exactly.

5:21

Boris Heik. Who line it anyway? Who

5:24

line it anyway? I

5:27

got you're in bushwick, tomorrow

5:29

night at Cobre Club. Bush

5:31

repairs. Love

5:33

it. Beautiful. Beautiful. Is that gonna

5:35

go? If you're in Philadelphia

5:37

on December the sixth, teens. I will be

5:40

headlining at the ECW arena

5:42

with Ryan Shneur and La Merle.

5:44

This is gonna be a cool one. Please come out. Yeah.

5:47

Very, very excited. A lot of life

5:49

stuff coming up me and Errenberg back on the

5:51

road this weekend, Thursday night, Indianapolis,

5:54

Friday night, McKesson, Illinois, Saturday

5:56

night, Glendale, Wisconsin. Then

5:58

I'll be in Toronto on the sixteenth and seventeenth

6:01

New Year's Eve with the great

6:03

Dave Smith plus that Amico, plus Karen

6:05

Feehan, plus Craig Cameco doing musical events,

6:07

plus Colin Turtle. New Year's Eve of the comedy

6:09

store in Los Angeles says bonkers, low

6:11

ticket warning right now. I by I'm assuming,

6:14

but the time this comes out on iTunes and all

6:16

the other things, this show's gonna sell out. So if you're

6:18

watching live, get those tickets right now. New leave. We're

6:20

gonna blow the fucking roofing. You need anyone else on

6:22

it or no? Are you gonna be an alright? You have no plans

6:24

on yours. Just yeah. A hundred percent. You be

6:26

on check. I can't let's talk. We'll

6:28

talk this. No. No. It's not important.

6:30

No. It's not important because we I also have

6:32

announced that there's gonna be tons of special that are awesome.

6:34

There's people hanging out. I'm gonna likely

6:36

add a second show anyway, and we

6:38

love you, Maddie. I think it'll be a fucking blast.

6:40

Maddy merch. If I Kelly. Good. Maddy Smith will

6:42

be on the shows where you We like dogs.

6:45

And then lots of other stuff coming up January,

6:47

Washington, DC, Phoenix, Arizona, Bloomington,

6:50

Minnesota, Ohio, Holger Falls, Ohio. I was

6:52

supposed to take February off, but my agent

6:54

booked me at the the funny bone in Saint Louis the

6:56

first weekend of February. So maybe

6:58

Saint Louis, I think the first time ever

7:00

doing headlining sets in Saint Louis. I I did, like,

7:02

guest spots at doctor Grins years ago, and

7:04

that's not in Saint Louis sets in Grand Rapids. So

7:06

there you go. How

7:08

about that? How about that? Well,

7:10

good morning to you. Yeah.

7:13

You guys got my twitch channel, twitch dot tv slash

7:15

girl. I don't think Watch me murder

7:17

children nightly.

7:20

Do do ridiculous horrible things to

7:22

little boys and little girls. Oh, off case

7:24

of money -- Yeah. -- for the love of the

7:26

game. From a little bit of cash, little cashola,

7:28

be a part of it. Subscribe, baby boys.

7:30

You could help me hurt children

7:32

just by go to twitch dot tv slash pro rata

7:34

snake, subscribe on iTunes, all

7:36

that other stuff to this channel, my youtube channel, youtube

7:38

dot com slash. Let me share you on this And

7:40

that's it. That's

7:41

it for the plugs.

7:42

It's enough. It's

7:45

enough, Shannon. I fucking said it's enough.

7:50

Alright. we have a

7:52

lot of fun stuff. A lot of fun stuff

7:54

happening right now. We were talking video games for a second

7:56

that you played a new video, namely playing. I'm

7:58

playing It's

7:59

like a a throwback Gomez. So it's like Genesis

8:02

style graphics. It's called Vampire

8:04

Survivor, and it's fucking

8:06

awesome, really. it

8:08

is so much fun. I got

8:10

Bobby Hutch playing it. I got Harrington

8:12

playing it. Oh, is that why everyone's fucking

8:14

up so much around here? I don't know. Left and

8:16

right. I'm doing my work. Yeah.

8:19

Well, Harrington doesn't doesn't matter

8:20

what video game he's playing. Harrington no.

8:23

Harrington at this point is in

8:25

charge of, like, four or five different shows. It's

8:27

it's he's turned around in a lot of ways in his

8:29

life, but, you know,

8:31

is he doing good? Shannon, do you know? Do

8:33

you know if he's doing good at his job? I

8:35

know that I haven't heard anything about a

8:37

major fuck up recently. I feel like that's a big

8:39

improvement. Yeah.

8:40

None news is good news in the world of Harrington. It

8:42

is. It's like the doctor. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly.

8:44

Absolutely. Doctor Harrington. So

8:46

you so Harrington has not been fucking up

8:48

that much. And who's the new Harrington? Who's the new fuck up

8:51

around here? You don't

8:53

know. I think we've been cracking the whip lately,

8:55

and there hasn't been that many fuckups lately

8:57

except for the Legion and Skanks team.

9:00

What did

9:00

they do? They

9:02

left plushies on the YouTube

9:05

channel. They left n words

9:07

on the YouTube channel. they're trying to get

9:09

a snapbook at them. There's

9:11

a bad thing to have there. It's

9:14

a pussy Edwards. Yeah.

9:18

Noted. Yeah. You

9:20

know, YouTube has clear cut

9:22

rules where you cannot leave n Boris or

9:24

pussies on the the fucking

9:26

channel. That's why I'm only fans. We just

9:28

surpassed a hundred thousand subscribers, and we're gonna

9:30

get our fucking channel news because our team can't get

9:32

their fucking heads out of their asses.

9:34

If you want n words and pussies, you gotta

9:36

go to gas digital network dot com. I've said that

9:38

for a long time. Okay. Or black. Yeah.

9:40

Yeah.

9:41

Solid. So anyway,

9:44

regardless, yeah, I'm I'm playing

9:46

Warzone. No. I'm so fucking bad

9:48

at it now. Did they change the

9:50

controls or anything, or just people got

9:52

better? No. No. No. They they

9:54

changed it where I'm madame said it's

9:56

probably boring to You're changing No. I'm, like, trying to think of any

9:58

video games. I'm playing. I'm, like You played the And I'm a

9:59

guys girl. No. Never. You're

10:01

supposed to be crosswords. I do

10:03

crosswords. That's my video games. Do you play a

10:05

world? If I'm

10:06

dating a guy, I'll play

10:07

whatever he does and be like, oh my Stop

10:10

him so bad. You know that? You

10:12

play wordle ever? No.

10:14

I'm not a wordle girl. Yeah. Yeah.

10:16

listen count. You gotta fucking My

10:19

ex

10:19

played those computer games,

10:21

the, like, map Gomez. you

10:24

age of empires and shit like that? No.

10:25

What is that? Is it like I know it's

10:27

like nerdy stuff. Some dorky shit. Yeah. Dorky

10:30

shit. I just play Warzone. and

10:32

they added proximity chat, which is,

10:34

like, the best thing. Mhmm. Okay? So that means, like, do

10:36

you know what Warzone is? No. I Yeah. Do

10:38

you know Warzone Boris? No. But does it

10:40

sound like words mean? It sounds like

10:42

Ukraine. I don't know. Well, you're gonna sound

10:44

like my home country. You're in the zone

10:46

and there's a war happening. Yeah. Exactly.

10:48

Well, but it's it's battle royale style.

10:50

So what happens is a hundred and fifty

10:52

people drop in at the same time and you're all

10:54

real people. So if you're not playing against a

10:56

computer, you're playing against a hundred and fifty

10:58

other people at the same time. Okay. So it's like Fortnite.

11:00

Right? like Fortnite Plus

11:02

not for fucking dorky versions.

11:04

This is for, you know But the con

11:06

sack, and I can wrap my head around.

11:08

We've had sex before. Yes. bunch of

11:10

times. Yes. It's a little more

11:12

realistic, and it's a little bit more and I

11:14

used to play Fortinet. I played Fortinet for

11:16

years. Right? but you

11:18

drop in and fucking this is a last man standing,

11:20

so you gotta kill everybody. And I play

11:23

I play Solo. So you can play with your team. You can play with your

11:25

squads. You can play with, like, three or four comics. You

11:27

don't be on the same squad, murder other

11:29

squads. That's fun. But I don't feel

11:31

the same sense of victory when I get

11:33

a solo victory royale. by myself

11:35

because I did it by my fucking stuff. Let's

11:37

go ten kills Soul of Victor

11:39

Roya. Let's fucking go, baby boys. But

11:41

here's the thing. Wars

11:43

on one, You're playing you

11:45

assume you're you're killing some kids. Right? You assume

11:47

there's probably some six, seven year old kids out there that

11:49

are that are playing the game. You kill them.

11:51

Wars on two, they added a feature called

11:53

proximity chat. Okay.

11:55

If I'm within like thirty yards

11:57

of you, and you're one playing

11:59

against you? I could be

12:00

like, oh, hey. No. That's I'm

12:02

coming up on my cock in your ass.

12:04

How old are you? You go

12:06

crazy and that check. Come on a fucking

12:08

get your butt little boy.

12:10

And I fucking and when you start talking

12:12

shit to each other, and it's

12:14

embarrassing sometimes, which is This little kid

12:16

is probably at the Thanksgiving his --

12:18

Yes. -- his older cousin who's, like,

12:20

thirty is watching. Yeah. So I'm

12:22

probably going to go to jail because the

12:24

things that I'm saying the children who say there's no

12:26

rules in the chat. But the

12:28

yeah. If you I I believe if you go to figs I

12:31

think figs posted some of his

12:33

proximity chat moments. You could pull it up, Shannon. I I mean, I

12:35

mean, I mean, post mine. but there's a it's great what will

12:37

happen is somebody will be like, now people

12:39

team up. So you'll you'll be you'll be

12:41

playing solos. Right? And then you'll see somebody they'll be in

12:43

the building, like, hey, dude, let's go fucking get to the

12:45

end together right now. And, like, let's just team up

12:47

against the the everyone else. I'd like our people to

12:49

do it. But, alright, maybe in the street. Then she's gonna shoot

12:51

you blast him in the fucking head.

12:54

That's dirty. Faber fucking thing in the

12:56

world. Patrol. Patrol. That's

12:58

dirty. And and it turns out It's

13:00

modulator. Oh, we gotta -- Yeah. -- trust anyone. What does

13:02

he do with the voice models? This is Morgan Freeman.

13:04

What? So from Nissan has it so

13:06

that his voice is Morgan Freeman. Really? God damn it. I

13:08

wish I didn't think Feeney did anything funny. And

13:10

it's so fucking funny. It's making me

13:12

furious that he's done anything slightly

13:14

funny. What voice would you do? Well,

13:17

one time one time I had another I

13:19

had another I had a person who used a voice modulator

13:21

and they were just a little girl. Okay. And

13:23

so it sounded like a sick year old girl. I'm

13:25

right behind you. What? What? What? What?

13:27

What? What? What? Are you scared yet? I'm coming for

13:29

you? I'm coming. That's that's gonna

13:31

happen. Then I

13:33

had to turn off my camera.

13:35

Yeah. Shannon,

13:37

do you find that or am I just making things up? Fig doesn't

13:39

have Proximity chat. Can you show me a funny one

13:41

yesterday?

13:41

Where would it be posted? I looked

13:44

on Instagram YouTube Twitch.

13:45

Forget it.

13:46

Forget it. Forget it. Forget it,

13:49

baby.

13:55

Janet, we gotta beat

13:56

we came on for getting through this

13:58

state of history. What are we up against today,

14:00

babe? So today Where

14:02

did Giggle? she giggled.

14:04

She liked that. You saw that,

14:05

guys? Well, I remember last time I was here, we were

14:07

supposed to do a real SMR really

14:10

real SMR

14:10

Real s m. What's Shannon's voice? Yeah. She does have

14:13

a great People really like the biggest

14:15

impression of her. Shannon

14:17

Gatton. Okay.

14:17

So in nineteen eighty two, American

14:20

singer and songwriter Michael Jackson

14:22

released thriller forty years ago today.

14:23

Wow. That's by the way, also

14:26

the year I was born.

14:27

Me too. Hell

14:29

yeah. Nice.

14:31

Thriller today, four years ago. Thriller,

14:33

that's a that's a great that's a great song.

14:35

It's a great album. They still

14:38

when is it because he's dead that

14:40

we've sort of moved away from we can accept

14:42

his fucking of children? because

14:44

I feel like if he was alive, I feel like

14:46

it would still be kicking up more dust.

14:48

It would, but also they nope. They didn't, like,

14:50

prove anything technically. Right? Am

14:53

I the only one that's still not sure if he did

14:55

it or not? I don't want to know that you're in almost

14:57

all black people. Yeah. Our present

14:59

One of many things we have in common. They

15:02

haven't they didn't prove anything, but I have millions

15:04

of stories and I've been I've been

15:06

told I've been in between documentary.

15:09

Yeah. I I don't know. I think those parents

15:11

don't get enough blame for starters. It just feels

15:13

like you're baiting the guy by letting him sleep

15:15

with your children. Well, you know what is the

15:17

nineties and things in the eighties.

15:19

Exactly. That's what you do. I'm gonna let it go

15:21

and

15:21

do divorce and do coke. Yeah. Yeah. Leave them at

15:23

Michael Jackson's and everywhere.

15:24

That's been awesome. Awesome. Look, the the

15:26

reality is, like, know, some of those

15:28

kids. Didn't we just read a story the

15:30

other day? Or somebody oh, no. I was

15:32

listening to a fucking my girlfriend

15:34

listens to Funnier

15:36

podcast. A funnier podcast. No. She listens to,

15:39

like, like, other podcasts. I'm, like, shit,

15:41

girlfriend. Yeah. I'm

15:43

not even upset. She's

15:46

gone, folks. See what I mean? She showed

15:48

up here. Why

15:52

did I wake up so early? I know, I know

15:54

we had this sexual chemistry for so long.

15:56

me today. I was like, hey, because it's

15:58

over. off. I kiss her right on the mouth

16:01

usually when I walk in.

16:03

Alright. Now

16:03

I see what's going on today. But

16:05

there was It was

16:07

it was, I guess, my favorite murder she listens

16:09

to. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Which is two checks talking

16:11

about True crime and shit. Yeah. True crime and

16:13

shit. So she was, like, you said, listen to me. you is

16:15

our podcast. Two girls with glasses talking

16:17

about Saturday. So I'm in but I'm

16:19

in a new relationship with a hot chick. So I'm like,

16:21

yeah. Listen to the Horseshoe Podcast. You like

16:24

it. It's over the are just listening to

16:26

other bitches talk to people here and She did

16:28

it for sure.

16:29

But people really things

16:31

out. And

16:31

they told a story about a a guy who,

16:33

I guess, has his

16:35

this

16:36

kid,

16:37

his father, like, lit him on fire. Like,

16:39

he was arguing with the mom, and then he, like, lit the

16:41

better. If I covered his kid in kerosene, then lit

16:43

his kid on fire, and they ended up they ended up

16:45

surviving and having, like, burns over

16:47

ninety percent of his body. Yeah.

16:50

But the reason and remind me of that was

16:52

because, apparently, Michael Jackson and, like, took this

16:54

kid under his wing and was, like, you

16:56

know, like like When did you say his hair

16:58

got lit on fire? Jeez. Like, he was, like, oh,

17:00

somebody gets it. My nose,

17:02

I don't know who it feels to be on

17:05

fire. Dangle you over the balcony

17:07

now. Well, that can have the

17:09

best of the entire thing. Right? I shouldn't say

17:11

that because it did get lit on fire. But I'm

17:13

saying And again, it's not withstanding. If

17:16

Yes.

17:19

And Tom, I just woke up.

17:21

Boom. Boom. Boom. And that kid grew up

17:23

to be Corey Feldman. doggy.

17:25

That does look like when Corey Feldman was Jason,

17:27

by the way. Dude, it looks

17:29

like a baby gerbil. Like a giant baby

17:32

gerbil. Yeah. It looks like kinda modern art

17:34

too. It's like really bad paper, Mache.

17:36

We're out of the bold

17:39

people. We've sent

17:41

to represent this to your prince.

17:44

Look at his hand. Actually,

17:46

he looks like bad paper machine.

17:48

That's so funny. That's like your kids art project.

17:50

like, well done. Yeah.

17:52

Like, he covered his brother in newspaper.

17:55

Yeah. Could we do the roast of this

17:57

kid? He's probably following with the roast

17:59

of him.

17:59

I'll

18:02

get my softener on that one. I found

18:05

you. I presented my with

18:07

me comings. you had to argue

18:09

that that kid. God

18:11

fucked up. But the the best part of him is,

18:13

like, Michael Jackson didn't wanna fuck

18:15

him. So he got all of, like, the best parks of being a a

18:17

little boy in nature. That's what he wants you

18:19

to believe, though. You know what I mean? Yeah.

18:22

You think Michael Jackson still fucked that kid. That's what he said. You think I'd

18:24

fuck this kid? Right. I'm not what?

18:26

Are you kidding me? That's why I only I

18:28

can't find a kid or kid. ugly.

18:31

Ooz. Yeah. I got

18:33

it. Good. That's why people like

18:35

me. Tawke. But also

18:37

Corey Feldman wears buy him. Right? He's still, like,

18:39

total Michael Jackson, here's a thing. That

18:41

was the most crowded locusts as he didn't fucking

18:43

me. Sorry. Walla. Right. So the

18:46

of they're dealing with some of that game still. The color is right

18:48

or die. I was saying Yeah. Honestly,

18:50

you know, fucking you know, a

18:52

lot of these kids, even if they are fucked,

18:54

not everyone's coming out and saying

18:56

it. Right? You have to admit to yourself,

18:58

to your family, to your friends that Michael

19:00

Jackson ate your but Yeah. And then you should be

19:02

in a grocery store and they're like, oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

19:04

So sometimes people just wanna don't and you hear

19:06

this with women. Yeah. I was always

19:09

horseshit. but I believe it when two men say. When a when a little

19:11

boy says, I don't wanna deal with that, but I'm like, you know what that

19:13

makes sense? But now it makes me have

19:16

empathy women. And I'm like, okay. I get why women don't

19:18

wanna relive their rapes over and over there. Oh, they've

19:20

been over and over. Yeah. Five years from

19:21

now, they're like, so what were you

19:23

wearing again? Yeah. I

19:25

think the biggest tragedy What a great what a great job

19:27

that would be though, but it's being accomplished that was

19:29

in the hot range stories. I

19:32

would actually have the sexy music in

19:34

the the police studio by card. Now tell

19:36

me exactly what happened. Can I hit the sexy Hold

19:38

on. I'm gonna light a camera. hit sexy music.

19:42

Alright. Now, what did where did you touch your gut

19:44

start? So he was Amico

19:47

featuring A

19:51

feature ring too. A feature more

19:53

offensive. A girlfriend was hot

19:54

and okay with it. Right.

19:57

We

19:57

got it. the biggest tragedy, Michael

20:00

Johnson, is that we lost the lease's birthday

20:02

episode of the Simpsons. Did they take that

20:04

away? Yeah. That's not on anything. And

20:06

it's the the producers of the Simpsons. took

20:09

it down? because one of the things in the

20:11

dock, I think they said or it's like

20:13

known, he used that

20:15

as like Oh, mom, Simpsons come

20:17

over and watch me on Simpsons. Like, he would

20:19

show kids that and be like, I know Bart

20:21

Simpson. But Simpsons is a it's not

20:23

like a child's cartoon. You know what I mean? Yeah.

20:25

But I think they of a late as used

20:27

as pedophile bait -- Right. -- they have a lot

20:29

of shame over. Yeah. And it's weird because he's

20:31

not the one singing in it.

20:34

That's it in person. because, like, the answer is not even

20:36

him doing a voice. No. It's his speaking

20:38

voice. Oh. But an impersonator does

20:40

the song. They couldn't afford but

20:43

nobody saw the recording of it. Like, it's

20:45

a very weird legal thing. Uh-huh. And then

20:47

they asked him about it. He's like, it's a joke

20:49

on my brothers. And they're like, what? And

20:51

then, you he had no connection to what was going

20:53

on. Yeah. He was kind of on a

20:55

different

20:55

planet by the end. But

20:58

if

20:58

my goal was alive today? Do you think

21:00

that we would probably be like, when I

21:02

was at my son's school, they did, like, a a

21:04

halloween parade. And the the weather was one of the

21:06

songs in the halloween parade. And I'm

21:08

like, it just it seems a little crazy

21:11

that we would use his music for anything

21:13

child related at the very least.

21:15

Right? is it it's

21:17

all but confirmed. Right? Like, what is the

21:19

what's the consensus on this? I don't think What

21:21

does Snopes I don't think it is. Sharon, what does Snopes

21:23

say about Michael Jackson fucking children? I have

21:25

to go with Snopes. He would have been convicted. Right?

21:28

If it was Will he have been confirmed? I mean,

21:30

why wouldn't he have been? maybe

21:32

because it was

21:32

so long ago, you know, but also

21:35

they'll cut off. But also

21:36

also I heard women say this shit too. Only

21:38

fifty percent of rapes are convicted. I'm

21:41

assuming it's a similar thing with child

21:43

rate. This is before cell phones,

21:45

before evidence. Remember the kid

21:47

described Michael Jackson's spotty

21:49

dick. Yeah. That

21:49

was, like, the thing. And then mister Jackson had to, like, go

21:51

and show his dick to them. Yeah. And so that it

21:53

wasn't spotty. Right. So it didn't He

21:56

made didn't work. I don't know. I Are

21:58

you such a fucking believer for Michael

21:59

Jackson who's going on Borys? I will I like

22:02

the music, but all told me Gomez. No.

22:04

No. I went through the Wikipedia and stuff like that. And I know the guy I

22:06

didn't watch the documentary. And people have told me, like,

22:08

watch the documentary, you'll be convinced. But it's a

22:10

documentary, so it's like two guys telling, like,

22:12

a very compelling it's not a court. It's two guys telling a

22:15

compelling story that I'm sure if you watch

22:17

them, it's upsetting, and it's compelling to listen to.

22:19

You're thinking you're murderer. When you

22:21

watch, you're this guy didn't do it, then you read it to everything and you're like, oh,

22:23

okay. That's just always different

22:25

than how it is and, like, whatever narrative that's

22:27

given, but also, like, those

22:29

guys apparently tried to sue unlike

22:31

under some other conditions. They, like, tried

22:33

to sue these. I don't remember the details now. I

22:35

just remember reading the Wikipedia and being, like, you know

22:37

what? Maybe he did it, but, like, I'm not convinced. Mhmm.

22:40

You know? So it's

22:42

just

22:42

these two guys. Is that really the thing? Is

22:44

it I didn't watch the documentary. The documentary

22:46

had before the doc Henry came out

22:48

though. This has been known. So it wasn't just it was it

22:50

was It's jokes. It felt to me, like, people were just

22:52

making fun of him because nine year. Ninety four.

22:54

Then he went to trial. He went to trial for and

22:57

he he danced on his limo. Right. But

22:59

he won the trial. Right? I'm just

23:01

saying, look, there's

23:03

so much peto smoke there.

23:05

Right. But that's the thing, is it's so much smoke.

23:08

Like, it seems like he, like, wasn't even

23:10

hiding being a fucking weirdo and talking to you

23:12

today. with pet a fire.

23:14

the

23:16

Damn. Damn.

23:24

petifier is how Japanese people describe Michael

23:26

Jackson. They also

23:30

probably love him, not a petifier. Yeah.

23:32

I I don't I don't know. I don't

23:34

know. What is it? Is the jury out of this?

23:36

I really thought it was all but, you know,

23:38

known. But am I crazy, Natalie? What does your

23:40

generation think of this? That's such

23:42

a

23:43

good question because I think

23:45

that the consensus is that he's

23:47

guilty, but also you're right that it's weird

23:50

that we're still like Oh, his me listen to his music. I

23:52

think it's Maybe because he's not making money

23:54

off of it anymore. If he was alive, I think

23:56

this would be, like, it'll be they can

23:58

keep on attack. That would be discouraged for

23:59

more. I

24:00

see music

24:01

is also so good. Like, when you when

24:03

people say separate the art from the artist, like, I can

24:06

get rid of Woody Allen movies. can get

24:08

rid of Arkelly's music. But Michael

24:10

Jackson, it's, like, halfway through the song and you're,

24:12

like, oh, shit. Miss Michael Jackson -- Yeah.

24:13

-- you know? But it's all yeah. It's, like, what did

24:15

I

24:15

It's a legend. what did

24:16

I do that I have to deny myself his

24:19

music? Do you know what I mean? Well, it's almost like Like,

24:20

at this point, it's more a loss for me than it is for

24:22

me. I'm just saying theorizing why he's why

24:24

he wants his stuff to

24:26

stick. Yeah. so much more than other people.

24:28

Yeah. because he's he's more legendary than -- It's why.

24:30

-- all the other people. Every time we go to restaurants, it's

24:32

the best. I was gonna find a restaurant I

24:34

eat meal because,

24:36

look, people like, I'll do that crazy. It's

24:38

a baby cow. Right? But they

24:40

killed that cow. Now, Wild Wings will let it go

24:42

to waste. You guys gonna go in the

24:45

garbage? It's home to Mexico in the back. That's

24:47

psychotic. Yeah. I'm gonna I'm gonna eat that big. I

24:49

like Vail. I love Vail. Yeah. I it.

24:51

give it to my kid and my niece. It's fine

24:53

if I abort the I gave

24:55

them a bite. I gave them a bite each

24:57

before six weeks. And then they

24:59

Yeah. And then I was like, you know what this is?

25:01

Like, they're like, what? I was like, it's a baby cow. And

25:03

then I'm like, oh. Yeah. I'm like,

25:06

you know what? So

25:08

tender.

25:08

Fuck that cute little thing.

25:09

You don't give a fuck

25:12

about food. delicious. I won't feel right

25:14

now. Okay.

25:15

I really don't give a fuck about food as long as it's

25:18

cooked. You know what I mean?

25:20

If

25:20

it's, like Is

25:20

that a joke? Like, you don't eat sushi? Is that a joke?

25:23

What were Michael Jackson's pronouns? He

25:25

he? He he. The boy that's

25:27

probably tweeted about. I said, somebody had you right there else.

25:29

I just saw somebody put a thing with him, Michael

25:31

Jackson Neumann, said he he. That's a funny joke.

25:33

Right? Yeah. Come on, guys. I'm just

25:35

fucking spitballing here. What

25:38

Karen, what did you find? Oh,

25:40

so the on on Snopes, they're talking

25:42

about the earliest charge was in nineteen

25:45

ninety three. a kid that they they

25:47

just call him Jay Chandler. He was

25:49

thirteen

25:49

Who was Jay Chandler? He was

25:51

thirteen years old. And I the

25:53

it settled out of court. They don't know how much. They assume it's

25:55

between fourteen and forty million dollars that

25:57

he got. Mhmm. And Y'all lose

25:59

a

25:59

relationship between a fourteen and forty

26:02

year old. He

26:03

doesn't say that there was

26:05

any insertion in

26:07

the experience, but said Michael

26:09

Jackson had me suck one nipple and twist

26:11

the other nipple while Michael Jackson

26:13

masturbated. That seems to be the

26:15

thing. Hook jacked off and did weird

26:18

shit. Yeah. Is that what he was with? Means that he

26:20

had control. Yeah.

26:24

The in the

26:26

in the documentary, they talked a lot about the guy

26:28

the little kid will have to cross the room and

26:31

bend over and spread his Yeah. I

26:32

don't know.

26:33

I just sent it, but cheeks.

26:34

My sense to yourself. Yeah. No. And then Michael Jackson would

26:36

eat his butt and jerk off? No. I think they

26:38

just spread his butt cheeks and then he won't. I

26:40

don't think there was any eating. but

26:42

I I could be

26:42

wrong. You know, he probably didn't wanna leave

26:45

evidence. Okay. You know what I was telling you there? Just No.

26:47

He didn't wanna leave DNA or, like, anything you get

26:49

in a rape case. It's like you go

26:50

over It all sounds unsavory,

26:52

if it's true. What what how

26:54

these fucking parents did fucking savory,

26:57

actually. Well, salty. But also, these

26:59

parents settle, and that just means people Oh,

27:01

sweet. A little sour

27:03

sometimes. Hey. I'm sorry.

27:05

We're being we're being kind of hile, sir.

27:07

I

27:08

I as the one that started this off defending

27:10

him. I just

27:10

We're the only ones making pedophile jokes, and he's

27:12

the only one defending him. Yeah. He's

27:15

a logic word. not funny, the man

27:17

is innocent. I

27:19

don't know.

27:20

These parents took, what, fourteen million dollars so

27:23

that he could go on molesting other kids. Is that

27:25

what I'm being told? You know what I mean? fourteen

27:27

to forty

27:28

Or maybe they just didn't have

27:30

the legal team For fourteen mil I

27:32

mean, it's a hack it's a hack joke at this point. But

27:34

for fourteen million dollars, I would usually

27:37

deal with the memory of Michael Jackson jerking

27:39

off on me. Right. So then would you send

27:41

your kid knowing I would say worse

27:43

worse memory for me. Remember I told the story

27:45

about the guy that that dragged me through piles of

27:48

glass? Yes. Yeah.

27:50

Way worse? No money. Nothing

27:53

for that. Why? Why? Sexual thing?

27:55

No. No. No. No. What a weird sexual

27:57

thing? No. No. I talked to her before,

27:59

but long story short, I

27:59

would I would I've I've always always been

28:02

very entrepreneurial. Right? So

28:04

what I would do is I would knock on people's doors in the

28:06

summer, but do you need your work done? Do you need me to

28:08

cleaning your garage or whatever else

28:10

it is? And there was a guy there's a bunch of

28:12

bottles on the side of this guy's, like, in

28:14

between, like, his garage and, like, a fence. And as

28:16

I get you cleared all those bottles, I give you, like, ten

28:18

bucks. And I was, like, sweet. Cool. So I go and I cleared all

28:20

the bottles. And he was like, yeah. Fuck

28:20

it. I'm gonna give you ten bucks. He was like, he's

28:23

just that guy. He's like, no shirt smokeless cigarette at a

28:25

mullet. He's like, listening to, like,

28:27

fucking ACDC in the background. So

28:30

then I'm like ten or something. So I just

28:32

start taking the bottles and I start flinging

28:34

them and breaking them where they clean them up. So

28:36

not only just putting them back, but I'm now I'm

28:38

breaking them where Right.

28:40

Yeah. By the way, rightfully so. Yeah.

28:42

Also, you're ten. Yeah. So then he

28:44

runs out after me, and then I start running. He grabs me

28:46

by my shirt and just dragged me through all

28:48

of the broken bottles that I had just broke.

28:51

Jeez. Yeah. Sucks. I would rather lick

28:53

Michael Jackson's. I would rather suck that

28:55

nipple and do fucking hang of the

28:57

Netherlands ranch -- Absolutely. -- it

28:59

rules. Did a little bit. This guy's gonna jerk

29:01

off on me. That's it. That's

29:03

it. Shut up. There's

29:03

a little bit more to his Whatever,

29:05

Shannon. Here we go.

29:07

Every time I make a great point, here

29:09

comes fucking Shannon, then they Adding

29:10

fuel to the petifier. And

29:13

he said on one occasion one occasion when Michael Jackson and

29:15

I were in bed bed together. Michael

29:17

Jackson grabbed my buttock and kissed me

29:19

while he put his tongue in my ear.

29:22

I told him it didn't like Michael Jackson started to

29:25

cry. Oh, oh,

29:26

wow. That is sad. It's like every one night stand,

29:28

he wake up. He's looking at your ear.

29:30

That's the thing she said, we asked her to defend

29:33

her. Yeah. I don't know if she wants until

29:35

you try. Yeah. How how

29:37

unromantic is consent? I

29:40

know. you mind if I could give you a little boy? Is this okay? Is this

29:42

okay? Is this

29:42

okay little boy? So that gets rid of

29:44

the evidence thing. He was putting his tongue in

29:46

there. Yeah. I don't

29:48

know. I didn't even

29:49

put his dick anywhere. Yeah. Like

29:52

I

29:52

said, it wouldn't be common the kid.

29:55

Right. That that's

29:55

what you wanna avoid. There's

29:57

not a lot of It sounds like he just, like, wanted

29:59

to

29:59

Yeah. He wanted to he wanted to play. I don't

30:02

know. Too many too

30:03

many things. It is a lot of stories. It's

30:05

a lot of stories. It's a lot

30:07

of firsthand accounts where I'm

30:10

going, like, there's just not that much

30:12

upside in, like, coming out now and saying we

30:14

need somebody. money. And everyone

30:16

we knew was, like, you know, guys are

30:18

shoplister. Like, he steals things everywhere

30:20

he goes. Yeah. Eventually, you hear that so many

30:22

times, you know, like, like, I probably traveling. So I'm not gonna let him

30:24

in my store, but I keep my eye on it. That's what

30:26

I said. I'm gonna let him in my office. let them

30:28

in Now we'd still go to Everland, but I

30:30

would keep my eye on my son.

30:32

Does he get sick? Right? Yes. Exactly.

30:34

Remember James? James. Oh, boy. Here

30:36

we go. He will do. From the

30:38

second story window. Your child

30:40

gets kidnapped or abducted, like,

30:42

if they don't find it in, like, a half

30:44

an hour, you're assuming it's just being

30:47

fucking

30:47

molested. Oh,

30:48

yeah. Turn it down. Yeah, dude. And, Melissa, I I

30:50

almost don't want to get back. I'm gonna have a leash

30:52

on my kid. Doggy, you know, you

30:54

need a chip. Michael, how difficult?

30:57

How difficult? is it gonna

30:59

be to just fucking

31:00

fucking to have to deal

31:02

with the I

31:04

would say that if

31:04

I was dating a chicken, she got rape, I was whether

31:07

it's like, It's a hold to do for me

31:09

now. You know? You have

31:10

it the hardest and

31:11

that's a joke. You really do the first time. Oh my god.

31:13

And that's why I'm an ally. The first

31:15

time I try to have sex with

31:18

her, like, how awkward is that? I'm like, are

31:20

you okay with this yet? Or is this so

31:22

brutally painful? What

31:24

do I do here? I don't think you need to

31:26

think about that right now. Why? But what do I

31:28

do? Or do you make the move or do you wait for her to make

31:30

the move? because likely, she's never

31:32

making that move. So you're just sitting here with you dinking

31:34

your hand all day long. when you

31:36

go back to work in the towers, you

31:38

know? I love the idea

31:40

of Luis watching doctor Melsie get raped

31:42

by the Popeyes guy. This is Brad. I

31:44

was going her poor boyfriend.

31:49

Why do you do it? What do you do?

31:51

Do you get back in there? you

31:53

do you like Probably won't wouldn't happen.

31:55

Is, like, encouraging You're like, hey,

31:57

you know what? Come on. You can do this.

32:01

Dude,

32:01

I don't know. Most rakes are by

32:03

people you,

32:03

like, no. Like, by

32:05

people you know. So you would probably be more

32:07

focused on beating that fucking guy

32:08

up. I was like, give me give me more focus on the rate

32:10

you just committed. Nice. Yeah.

32:14

Nice. How

32:16

do you deal with someone

32:17

who you just?

32:18

Right? You would probably be fucking killing

32:20

a guy though. Yeah. I guess so. Yeah.

32:22

That would be out

32:23

there. But then even after that, you beat up

32:25

the guy, you come back. But can I get my

32:27

my victory pussy now? Oh,

32:30

you're in pain. Never mind. Damn.

32:32

That's a tough situation,

32:33

man. Yeah. So that's Fuck him in the ass.

32:35

For all parties. What if you had a kid

32:36

who okay. What if you had a kid who was, like, Amy

32:39

Amy's smart?

32:42

Amy Smart? Or

32:42

was it The monkey that's what the

32:45

monkey was saying that movie. Right? It's like girl who

32:46

got abducted for, like,

32:49

ten years. And she was, like she showed

32:51

up, like, with a family and a wave, and they're, like,

32:53

that's her. Oh, with the She mentioned that's her

32:55

head.

32:55

The kimmy

32:57

Schmidt.

32:57

Yeah. A breakable Kimmy Schmidt. Right. That's

33:00

definitely a lighter version of it. Yeah. A

33:02

breakable. Sounds like a challenge to

33:04

me. That's what they all think I

33:06

am. I'm gonna do. that -- Right. -- challenged.

33:08

This is good, guys. We're just

33:10

zinging each other left and right. You know?

33:12

No one saved you. He's still on Michael Jackson.

33:15

Okay. He's really honest, dude. again,

33:17

as as the one who defended him, I feel like I should

33:19

take it the most seriously. But again, it's

33:21

a lot of

33:21

it's nasty stories, but like

33:23

you just said, if everyone's talking about

33:25

the shoplifting, you don't let him in your store and

33:28

yet everyone's letting him in their their store. You

33:30

know what I mean? Not everyone. these

33:32

people got a price. People also people are, like, star

33:35

fuckers. They like And I'm famous

33:37

people. Before

33:37

all the social media discourse, like

33:40

shit like that, motherfuckers were to

33:42

send their kids everywhere. To our

33:42

Cali. Right? People let her let her daughter and

33:45

shit like those. You got a piss go.

33:47

There was that video of our Cali on stage

33:49

with, like, eighty five girls trying to grab his

33:52

cock. Yeah. Yeah. After everything. That was way after.

33:54

Yeah. No. I mean, there's still, like, you go to school.

33:56

It was the one girl. Do you remember she

33:59

she posted

33:59

a video

34:01

on TikTok, and I guess her

34:03

dad was in jail with r Kelly.

34:05

And then her dad put

34:08

Arkelly on the phone with his daughter. be like, almost any she he's

34:10

like, am I daughter to talk to you? And she's like and her she

34:13

got, like, really excited. And she was

34:16

just like, you know and then, yeah, like, she put it on TikTok. She got blamed

34:18

because people were, like, why are you celebrating this

34:20

fucking rape Her dad, it's almost like this guy in

34:22

a rapist jail doesn't have the best

34:24

judgment. Yes. Thanks,

34:26

Shannon. It makes me think. Damn

34:28

Shannon looking

34:30

good. Oh, no. This is not with the

34:32

creamer. This is with just a little bit

34:34

of milk. you. I

34:35

put half and half. I thought you were

34:36

dieting. Okay. Shannon, I'm a little bit of

34:38

cream making a fucking hurricane. put cream. What do

34:41

you have? Right. Dylan, can I have another coffee? If

34:43

you really wanna get dragged? A little bit of cream is not

34:45

gonna make any sense.

34:48

Six months. Every

34:50

little thing. Well, they they were trying to eat cookies when it came

34:52

in here. Right? Yeah. Which

34:53

you but because you resisted that, now you're

34:56

putting cream in. A little bit of creamers

34:57

aren't gonna hurt

35:00

nobody. Mhmm. Gomez on. Come on

35:01

now. Ask the rock. The

35:03

rock does not have dreamer. But a

35:05

little bit, like, less than

35:07

a I like, two, three grams of sugar a day is not gonna

35:09

fucking it's gonna keep me in kudos to you. with milk?

35:11

because there's too much sugar in a drop and Well,

35:14

no. This isn't the I I wanted the

35:16

flavored creamer.

35:18

Oh, wow. Dylan. You fat fuck. I'm gonna

35:20

shame you until June just let you I

35:22

want sugar free. I want sugar free flavored creamer

35:25

from now on in the

35:28

studio. Italian sweet cream. Thank you very much. Thank you,

35:30

Dylan. Appreciate that. I really enjoyed some Italian sweet.

35:32

That's what I call Dylan. My little Italian sweet cream.

35:34

That's what I call my figs come.

35:36

No. Oh, I don't know. Sorry. You know,

35:39

it'd be chunky and, like, sour. It

35:41

would not be it would not be

35:43

sweet. It's There's

35:46

nothing sweet. It'll be like

35:48

It'll be like Totsiki. Do you

35:50

know what that means? Oh, yeah. My mates come

35:53

taste like, tell you whatever, let's see. Can you title it a

35:55

little bit of color? Yeah. The little the

35:57

little dale piece. Oh, yeah. That's his side. He's

35:59

like, I

35:59

don't know happens every time. But

36:02

it tastes like a really bad version of Sebastian Madison style clothes comp. Yeah. It's like a low budget.

36:04

Oh, shit. The

36:06

generics of Alright.

36:10

So let's see. Qatar is

36:13

hosting The World

36:15

Cup. No. Can you not

36:17

pronounce that product? Cutters. I learned that kind of recently. Is

36:19

it cutters? That's what I am. You know, you've been a bit

36:22

long there. Let's take a quick moment and

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quick in the mail. What a great holiday treat.

37:02

yodelta dot com. Alright. Where were we? Don't you hate

37:04

cutters? I just like

37:06

to self harm in different ways. I hate

37:08

them. I don't hate them. I shouldn't say that.

37:10

Don't cut yourself anymore. you're hearing that.

37:12

Don't do that. Relax, chill. I don't

37:15

like seeing it yet. So I

37:17

shouldn't know. If you're cutter, be a cutter,

37:19

be go cut. isn't the

37:21

whole point for you to know? That's how I feel

37:23

about the gays. because

37:28

there's girls that do it, like, inside, like, their leg and, like,

37:31

that's somebody who's doing it for the

37:33

love of the pain. Yeah. That's what

37:35

I'm saying. Cut I mean, you don't make your

37:37

fucking stupid wrist. Cut yeah. Or

37:39

cut your arm. It's fine. Yeah. Keep

37:41

your sleeves on. Okay.

37:43

Don't fucking don't make a difference. Will those scars

37:45

stay forever? They do. They do. And I

37:47

feel bad for me. When I see, III

37:52

sliced the letters NIN into my arm, like, nine

37:54

ish nails when I was in high school. He

37:56

was trying to say the n word would have

37:58

started. I

38:00

was like, no. Nice there. I just

38:02

don't I guess I kinda like their

38:04

music. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

38:06

No. No. Nine

38:08

nine

38:08

inches nails. Yeah. No. I I

38:10

put NIN into my arm, like

38:12

a a little fucking

38:14

poser. And you could still see it?

38:16

No. It gets here anymore. I didn't

38:17

go that deep though. I I tried once just to see, like,

38:19

what's everyone? because, you know, I was in What's

38:21

everyone I think

38:22

about when we when

38:24

on everyone. Oh, wow. Pictures were gone. He says, like, bitches. No. They're

38:26

doing a lot of bitches. In the email.

38:29

How old are you guys? I'm thirty

38:31

one. In the email. in

38:33

the seven. So

38:34

in the emo phase, taking Sunday, like

38:36

mainstream was, like, kinda sync cycling over to

38:38

the the

38:39

basic girls were, like, cutting themselves. three

38:41

There was there was a three Here's the

38:44

real thing. Thursday, taking back Sunday,

38:46

at least. They got kind of bit. And then

38:48

follow-up, boy, kinda mainstreamed it all.

38:50

Yeah. Yeah. They made all regard easy. Yeah.

38:52

No. I know. the fuck down. But we're not gonna do

38:54

emails It was right before I was on a big three year

38:56

thing. It was a three year

38:57

thing. And so bitches were cut so one night, I

38:59

was, like

38:59

two to thousand five. Yep. Exactly.

39:02

Yeah. And

39:02

one night, I was like, let's see what the bit.

39:04

What it's all about? I couldn't even I

39:06

was like, Ow. Oh, a glass shard.

39:08

I tried to see a beard. Not even it was, like, a feeling I

39:10

was, like, I'm good. Yeah. I did a razor blade.

39:12

I did a razor blade. Yeah.

39:17

And I got and I am, but it was very, like,

39:19

we're, like, oh, like, paper cut, like, yeah. Yeah. On paper cut,

39:21

the other day, taking a

39:24

fucking Perrier

39:26

out of the fridge. I got a paper

39:28

cut open in the box, and I shrieked

39:30

like a woman behind my girlfriend, and I

39:32

watch her go, okay, I can't even be. I I watch

39:34

her in that moment, be like this account animal, we're not gonna be together anymore. You can't cry

39:36

when you get a paper cut. You're like, cut my

39:39

life in for two places. This

39:43

is my last girlfriend -- Your father. --

39:45

bled to death outside of strip club. That's

39:47

true. And you cried

39:50

because you cut your hand opening a pariette. Yeah. I didn't

39:52

cut my hand. I got a paper that did. Yeah. But

39:54

you know what? You see it?

39:58

Yep. It

39:59

says nine

39:59

inch nails. Just

40:02

We need to send you to the safe wire. Doggy. Look

40:04

at that. It's a fucking national paper cut

40:06

sucks all the dick and I'd rather be stabbed in my

40:09

lower intestine like my father than simply get

40:11

a pari a paper cut. Again,

40:13

I would rather lick Michael Jackson's nippon twist Khaykin other

40:16

one. Then get a paper cut. I feel like if you

40:18

I swear on my son's life, they say paper

40:20

cut or suck on Michael Jackson's nippon twist

40:23

the other one. swear myself. Oh, now it'll probably come off.

40:25

I was like,

40:25

oh, oh, wait. But

40:28

I

40:29

also feel like Lewis you've

40:31

been dragged through shards of glass when

40:32

you were ten, you're like, I'm good on cutting. Yeah. I

40:34

don't need it

40:35

anymore. Yeah. Yeah. That

40:38

was it. Zach, you never cut? Nope.

40:40

Not

40:41

once? Nope.

40:43

Shannon? I

40:46

don't think oh, there I have a small memory

40:48

of trying to, but it was, like, with a butter

40:50

knife or something. Oh, yeah. she noticed.

40:52

Yeah. I think I did try it, but

40:54

it didn't last. We're like, will this replace

40:56

cigarettes alcohol while you didn't? No.

40:58

Self eat chicken?

40:59

food. Yeah. There was never

41:02

AAA need for self harm.

41:04

I've always just sort of been I

41:06

know that I I've known that I was great. I was

41:08

like, I can't why am I gonna try to fucking

41:10

hurt what this is? Do you have a punch

41:12

of wall? but it wasn't to hurt myself. It was hurt the

41:14

wall. But was it? It was

41:16

because he knew the wall can't feel

41:18

feeling it. He was, like, but it was

41:22

No, dude. Maddy. Who is this? Not your

41:24

boss. This is shit.

41:26

No. I would punch

41:30

walls. I

41:30

have one memory of punching a wall in anger. Did it hurt? Or did

41:33

you have such adrenaline? Well, I

41:35

definitely remember punching through

41:38

it. and I'm sure my parents were pissed and I had to fix it.

41:40

But I feel I can't

41:41

spackle, dude. I just literally put a poster

41:43

over it. Thank you. That

41:46

was it. Yeah. That's right. Punch that

41:48

wall. Yeah, doggy.

41:50

I I would punch walls

41:54

Yeah. Anytime I would argue with my I would

41:56

punch holes through the

41:57

walls up

42:00

until

42:00

up until

42:03

You stopped

42:04

the right thing? Then

42:06

all of a sudden I have control.

42:09

Isn't that interesting? No.

42:11

Up until, like, probably

42:14

Kim. Like, that I mean,

42:16

that reason I was five years ago, I guess. But, you know

42:18

what I'm saying? Like, we and I haven't I

42:20

stopped destroying my property and my things -- Right. -- a thing logically

42:23

came into my my head or was, like, why am

42:25

I just making my life harder?

42:28

And that's when you started hitting the girls. And then I started beating the girls instead. You can't

42:30

spackle those. Yeah. But I would yeah. I would

42:32

punch holes in the walls. I would punch holes in

42:35

the doors. I would punch Yeah.

42:37

I feel like that's the male version. You know what I mean? Like,

42:39

that's the male version of cutting yourself

42:42

kinda. Kind of. I it was I'm you

42:44

know what? I remember one. Does nothing of that you're

42:46

accomplishing. I was dating a girl when I was, like,

42:48

twenty years old. This girl, Katie. She's come up

42:50

throughout the years. Okay? This girl first

42:52

girl I went to

42:54

Jamaica with, This is the girl that at the the UFC

42:56

event, they somebody called her fat. We all

42:58

pretended that we we didn't hear because we'd have to

43:00

fight these guys because they called her fat in front

43:02

of her. I've been

43:04

there. I I've been with a girl who's

43:06

been cat called in a crazy way. We're just, like, pretending

43:08

it isn't here. No. We can't deal with this

43:11

right now. Right? But this girl remember one time, we used to read Harry

43:13

Potter in the park to each other and, like, out loud.

43:15

Oh, wow. It was really gay. Right? But we had to

43:17

do an argument because she was also a

43:20

slut. So

43:22

She, like, fuck this. Let's love Harry. You know what

43:24

I'm saying? crazy. Yeah, dude. She's fucking

43:26

she I called her Griffin Hor.

43:29

Let me slither

43:30

in then. Yeah. Yeah.

43:31

Yeah. Yeah. So we got

43:33

the argument about her fucking my friend,

43:35

Greg, I think. and then I I

43:38

punched a tree the same way

43:40

with the same intensity that I would punch a

43:42

closet door.

43:44

Yeah. And it was a, like, a

43:46

tree in central park. Not even, like, a little, like, a giant solid, like, oh, big

43:49

whole fucking tree. And,

43:51

I mean, I punch it so hard, and I

43:54

felt my hand shatter. Like, just

43:56

like, literally, just everything breaking my hand

43:58

underneath the pressure of it. And

43:59

the tree no

44:02

give. Like,

44:02

no. I mean, no. It's like punching a

44:04

bouncer. It was crazy. I can't get

44:06

it. It was so hard. It was

44:08

fucking like, I don't know why I thought it was so you don't have to leave. head

44:15

on out now. This shit fucking

44:18

I mean, my hand just shattered. I mean, I

44:20

felt it all the way to, like, my forearm.

44:23

And it was it was, like I mean, for

44:25

years, like, just pain in my hand, like,

44:27

just broke I didn't go to the doctor to get insurance.

44:29

I mean, that's worse than cutting yourself. Right? Yeah.

44:31

I mean, yeah. But it wasn't wasn't to

44:33

hurt myself. It was to You have balled

44:36

up anger. It feels right. Yeah. When you

44:38

when you I I would say it's

44:40

more similar to,

44:42

like, fucking you know, you you just like breaking, you're breaking

44:44

something. You know, it's more about breaking

44:46

something than hurting yourself in that moment and your fist

44:48

is just something that you could I

44:50

think that's kinda you still there

44:52

both about the release? No. I think

44:54

that the the self harm and and the

44:56

feeling of the

44:58

pain, it maybe distracts them from whatever emotional

45:00

shit it is. It's like a it's a hyper

45:02

focus of this pain in that moment, and they

45:04

don't think

45:06

about their fucking sad boyfriend that they're not dating anymore or whatever

45:08

else it is. I've known it. I don't I don't really know the

45:10

psychology behind cutting because every time I meet

45:12

the cutter, I run-in the opposite direction and I'm like,

45:14

get your

45:16

fucking weird arms away from There's lots of me when I meet a guy who

45:17

punches holes in wall, so maybe it's a

45:19

decision. You know? It was jockey. Those years

45:22

ago. What day?

45:24

I got every motherfucker has punched a hole in the wall. In front of you. We're fine. We are

45:26

good. I'm surprised.

45:28

what I mentioned there. No. No. This was I

45:30

mean, you know yeah. I mean, I

45:32

mean i I just stopped

45:35

breaking my things. That was it.

45:37

Yeah. You can also

45:37

think it is maturing.

45:40

Sort of

45:40

maybe or just having a more of

45:42

an appreciation for having things. Right. I didn't have anything nice before. So

45:44

when you're in a shitty apartment without any nice things,

45:46

you're just like and you're just kinda like fucking,

45:49

you know, whatever it is, you're

45:52

like, not really thinking, you know, beyond that. Like, now I'm going, like,

45:54

like, I have to replace that thing

45:56

with a nice thing. I have to go and plaster

46:00

that, well, I was never really planning on plastering the wall or replacing the

46:02

door. Right. I was planning on

46:04

always from the day I handed my security

46:06

deposit in

46:08

this apartment day one, I was like, just so is Thank

46:10

Goodbye. Yeah. You know, that's

46:12

that. Yeah. See you later. Yeah. That's

46:14

maturing.

46:14

When you

46:14

get angry, do you still feel

46:17

you want to? Do you want to

46:19

do it?

46:20

No. I don't really get that

46:22

angry anymore. Like That's good. I

46:24

don't I don't I don't I don't really lose just

46:26

I sort of took those triggers out of my life. I don't let things if if

46:29

there's a person if it's a chick that

46:31

I'm dating and she's getting me

46:34

that angry, immediately. I'm I'm over it. Like, I don't ever I will I'll

46:36

never allow myself to get into, like, a really toxic

46:38

relationship again. You know,

46:40

if I find myself, like, you know,

46:43

I just get I get angry in traffic. I just kinda

46:45

get fucking flustered. That's normal.

46:48

That's it. Yeah. That's really it. I have a little bit of road

46:50

rage with something than that. But I'm fucking I'm getting

46:52

old dude. I'm I'm thinking about I'm I'm

46:54

thinking about different things right now. Getting rid of people

46:55

is the number one way to control your sheet. Yeah. You

46:57

gotta cut

46:57

people in your life. You gotta

47:00

do it? cut shitty

47:02

people out, you know? Or cut

47:03

yourself. Or cut you gotta choose one. Choose

47:05

one. Pick a lean. Alright.

47:08

Let's see. You know what? Let's do

47:10

this. Fuck it. You know, let's go watch snackin' on Burger

47:12

topping edition.

47:25

Hell yeah.

47:30

So I had this

47:31

argument the other

47:34

day. about Burger

47:35

toppings. Okay. Burger toppings. What is your

47:37

ideal Did we talk about this one I was on

47:39

with what? Burger toppings?

47:42

We talked about the ideal burger order, I think. No. Well, I think

47:44

we talked about a burger place. Okay. Mhmm.

47:47

What's the burger place? What

47:49

what's actually on might have

47:51

been ideal McDonald's or okay.

47:54

Yeah. I can get into this.

47:56

Okay. Let's go. What is your what is your your

48:00

your ideal Burger. What's on

48:00

your burger? How do you make it? What is it? How

48:02

is it done? Fucking hungry. Alright. You know,

48:04

first of all, I'll say this. Go to the

48:07

Go to the Paul that I put up Shannon the other day because it was I

48:09

was debating what my check were in the car, and I'm not gonna tell

48:11

you which one was mine. I'll tell you

48:14

which one I'll

48:16

tell you tell me which one you think is better. Choice one medium rare mozzarella,

48:19

barbecue sauce, little crispy fried

48:21

onions, pickles, ketchup, may on the side, or

48:23

choice number two medium rare, American

48:26

cheese, bacon, fried egg,

48:28

lettuce, onion ring, may I own ketchup on

48:30

the burger? It's one for me right away because I

48:32

don't do ketchup. don't do catch up. I

48:34

don't do catch up. That's crazy. Heavy.

48:36

That's crazy. I didn't grow up on it. I think

48:38

it's sweet. I don't hate it,

48:40

but there's Anything that I would eat with ketchup, I like the taste of that better that.

48:42

Manage and ketchup together, like,

48:44

fucking, you know -- Literally.

48:48

-- white on rice, baby boy. I'll do it with mayonnaise before I do loan

48:50

for you. You gotta do mayonnaise and you gotta

48:52

do ketchup. Let's get real. With with

48:54

both fries and a burger, I'm

48:58

salivating. Yep. Fact. Bannies

48:59

and ketchup. I

49:00

would do the second option, but I

49:02

would I would take a fried egg and the onions

49:04

off. I'm like a traditional burger queen.

49:07

Really? Yeah. See, I sorry. The second one

49:09

was mine. I threw the Friday. The first one was

49:11

obviously hers because there were deep

49:13

unnecessary details. Of course,

49:16

a woman set it. Yes. A little crispy fried

49:18

Just gonna set fried onions. Well --

49:20

I got a spicy barbecue sauce. Yeah.

49:23

-- they were too many little particulars.

49:25

I know it's like a woman said that. Yeah. Lewis is like a

49:28

whopper. Yeah. I

49:30

want mood.

49:33

No. Well, there's a difference between a little little

49:35

crispy fried onions and then the -- Yeah.

49:37

-- onion ring obviously. Right? So some people didn't

49:39

even know what those little crispy fried onions are.

49:41

I will say, I threw the fried egg in there, it's shorter to

49:43

be an asshole. I I wanted to make sure. I do like

49:45

a fried egg on a burger, but it's a

49:48

little bold. Yeah.

49:49

No. I do I wanna go Like a brunch burger. I'll do a

49:51

fried egg on. I do a fried egg, like, as often

49:52

as I see my family once a year.

49:55

Wow. Yeah. On a burger

49:56

in

49:58

general, on a burger. Oh, okay. It's like sometimes I throw it

49:59

in. It's rare. It's rare that I

50:01

will fuck in. It's really rare.

50:03

There you go. Let's

50:06

gonna do it once in a while. It's it's

50:08

rare that I'll do it. I don't know why I

50:10

threw it in there. I probably should have thrown

50:13

some avocado on that burger. Yeah.

50:15

Or The patty is

50:16

good as it's supposed to be. It

50:18

should be cheese, lettuce, tomato,

50:20

ketchup, mayo.

50:22

Cheese, lettuce, tomato, ketchup. Ma'am?

50:25

Ma'am, nothing else. Yeah. Or I like bacon. I like bread and bread and bread and

50:27

bread and bread. But pickle chips.

50:29

And pickles and Maybe

50:32

red onion. Yeah. I like some raw red onion. I'll say

50:34

Yeah. Depending on the lettuce, if it's

50:37

the fucking, like, lettuce that they give you, like

50:39

No. Like, show it. I

50:41

don't got lot of You what is the subway? I I'm

50:44

talking about kicking butt. Not a

50:46

traffic light. You know, fuck it, mother. You

50:48

just don't know. And if you don't

50:50

know to your and then all of a sudden you

50:52

got lettuce hair on your fucking burger. That's why you

50:53

gotta look at the online. See what

50:55

the

50:55

burgers like. Yeah. One

50:58

good leaf of lettuce, actually, a nice crispy

51:00

leaf lettuce. Maybe there's some

51:02

spinach on that bitch. Why not? No way.

51:04

What? I am nicks in that.

51:07

I am nicks in that. spinach

51:09

on a burger? I can do it.

51:11

No. No. Let us I'll do

51:13

spinach before I do lettuce. Zach never had spinach,

51:15

so he can't in. He's like spinach spinach

51:18

spinach. Zack puts Popeyes on his

51:20

boat. I

51:22

enjoy spinach. I

51:24

saw your train of thought. It's been as the pass. Right? Yeah. See. It

51:26

was very easy to see how my mind works. Yeah.

51:28

Or smaller association -- Yeah. --

51:30

one out of four times is a joke. Yeah.

51:32

That's the way it works. or the same. God

51:36

bless. So, yeah, no, I I will

51:38

say

51:39

Potato roll? Tate a potato bun?

51:41

Sure. Sometimes they're dry. I'm gonna slap it

51:43

down, get a potato bun. Mhmm. Sloppage up

51:45

a potato bun all day. How do you feel to slap

51:47

it down, Maddy? Maddy

51:49

you say? We're very sexual right now. I like hippie

51:52

jokes. Wildwood. Sloppie jokes.

51:54

I'm breaking up. I love this segment, by the way. She

51:56

loves it. Which snacking out of one of the best segments

51:58

in podcasting? I had to say we

52:00

had to we had to limit it to once a week though because

52:02

we did what you snacking on all three shows last

52:04

week. We got way to it was

52:06

Thanksgiving now. Those things getting weak. How are you not doing what you're snacking on guys? It's

52:08

getting weak. And now we're doing it the week after.

52:10

Yeah. But this is a special specific

52:12

edition. See, with the Burger topping edition. Burger

52:14

topping edition.

52:16

I say, probably, if I'm just ordering a burger,

52:19

right? Mhmm. I will say,

52:21

fuck the lettuce altogether. I'll just throw

52:23

a big old tomato slice and

52:25

a big old one big -- Yeah. -- onion slice.

52:27

That's what I like. A delightful

52:30

onion with some cheddar cheese or I Maddy it

52:32

might have to be a miracle. Melt

52:34

so well. Is it a fucking female? Bring it in. Bring it in. Thank

52:37

fucking God. What is it? It put me in such

52:39

a bad mood this morning. I was in a really

52:41

bad mood this morning. because

52:43

I realized tomorrow's elf on a shelf day.

52:46

Right? Yeah. Did you grow up with elf on a shelf? Yeah. We

52:48

had the I had mine at my house. Is this the

52:50

female

52:51

one? It's what? Thank fucking god,

52:54

dude. Oh, she's cute. So I

52:56

got my kid. off on a shelf a couple

52:58

years ago. Right? Then we had a female. I'm

53:00

not gay. Like, I didn't

53:02

choose a female. Right? Oh, that's a guy? This is a

53:04

female. Oh, that's a girl. Okay. Yeah. A girl. How do

53:06

you tell? So Yeah. But

53:08

he You gotta do love this. I'm gonna

53:10

spell it. look she's sitting like a gay girl. Let me

53:11

smell the elves. Crapies. She is a little

53:14

lesbian. She's

53:14

like Ellen Jenner's Oh, yeah. For sure.

53:18

Mhmm. that it was on the

53:20

back of the booth. It's the Elliot page. Elliot on the shelf. So

53:24

then over

53:26

morning. He's like, tomorrow is off on a shelf day. And in

53:28

my mind, I'm going alright, James. First of all, you're too

53:30

old for this. We got a he's almost ten. I've

53:32

never heard of this before.

53:34

This funny because I think two years ago, you Yeah. My wife's Christian. I've heard of

53:36

other Christian stuff, but I've never I've

53:38

heard

53:38

of elf on the shelves. Okay. Let's give him

53:40

let's given the backstory the

53:42

backstory. So

53:42

this is an alpha on the shelf. This is an alpha. But

53:44

there's a case. I think initially, it was

53:46

simply an alpha set on the shelf. It showed

53:49

up today, the I'm just Boris keep your eyes,

53:51

to get scared you. It's like a scarecrow.

53:53

Mine stays all

53:56

year. Did No. I think we'd

53:58

sit on the shelf and just watch the kids all

54:00

year. Then it turned into a game where the

54:02

elf starts to move and do different like,

54:04

each day, it's in a new place. So

54:06

the kid thinks it moved on a James' elf sprinkles

54:08

this bitch. She moved somewhere because

54:10

she can't be found in my house. Okay.

54:13

I don't know. I have no idea where it's at. Right?

54:15

My my sister, she helped me organize. I think

54:17

she fucking moved in and doesn't remember, and she's making me

54:19

very fucking angry about

54:22

this. Okay? So either way, this morning, I'm like and my day is

54:24

packed. But everything thing to thing

54:26

back to back. I gotta go from here, gotta do

54:28

another podcast

54:30

meetings. I don't have time to go to a fucking Target or any of these places.

54:32

And I remember last time I needed to fuck it, Alf

54:34

was the day before Alf on the shelf

54:36

day. COULDN'T FIND ONE. THAT'S WHY

54:38

I HAD TO GET A FEMALE, THE INITIAL

54:40

TIME. RIGHT? SO I WAS LIKE,

54:42

YOU KNOW what? WE HAVE HOUR HAY. he's

54:45

not doing nothing. So I sent him out on it with a

54:46

mission to get me a female elf on the shelf

54:49

and he succeeded. Great job, man.

54:51

How much was this? how much

54:53

was

54:54

or

54:55

head. Thirty five? Alright. So I'm

54:58

gonna

54:58

give you fifty. So you actually profited fifteen

55:01

dollars. That's fucking sweet. Good job, Jorge.

55:03

because his time is where Welcome to America. I'm kidding, Jorge. I'm gonna give you a whole

55:06

fifty ass hole. He just accepted

55:08

it too.

55:10

these guys gotta have a little bit more fucking gumption. Really? Work

55:12

hard, though. What do you did you gonna let me walk

55:14

all over your horn? You know what? I I should honestly

55:16

take the money away now. I

55:18

really should. I should make you buy the alfana. You

55:20

should make Jorge sit on the shelf for a while. Yeah.

55:22

You should. Elfana.

55:26

Did

55:28

you remember last year, we were joking about

55:30

getting a black one. Now they have a fucking

55:32

Snoop Dogg and Snoop Dogg -- No. No. -- last year, we

55:34

were gonna get him a black one. Literally, he

55:38

knows we wanna do a sloop on the stoop. Yeah. And they

55:40

have it this year. You should take

55:42

Jorge's money

55:42

away and then drag him through shards of

55:44

glass. Yeah. Show

55:45

him a

55:48

lesson. But Lewis does up to the house. Like, he'll

55:50

put it in the freezer. Like, just pick

55:52

it up. Egg egg

55:53

carton last year. Right? there's,

55:55

like, an egg thing. I've done

55:56

a lot of things. He broke eggs.

55:58

She she she drew on James' face. Got

56:00

little comfy pants. These are these

56:02

are great these are great affluent shelf ideas.

56:04

So maybe I'll do that. Gummy oh, gummy due to gummy out of the

56:06

sink would be a fire one for

56:08

the first night. That's

56:11

really you. This

56:12

is very wholesome. So it's like the snow, the snow, the snow. She's

56:14

she's named sprinkles because the first day she

56:16

showed up, she got into the sprinkles and spilled

56:18

them all over the kitchen counter. and

56:20

I play it up every morning, like, I get angry. Yeah. I'm this fucking hell. I

56:23

get really mad. This bitch.

56:25

This fucking cut. Did James

56:27

get your fucking ass? Goddamn it. Punch a

56:30

hole in the arm right now. She's a

56:32

horror. Your elf punched

56:34

a knee sized whole move. You

56:37

should

56:37

because it's a girl, you should put her

56:39

in, like, you should do sex stuff. No. We're not doing stuff.

56:41

Okay.

56:41

So I'm just trying to be funny. Sorry. wrong

56:43

with Alf is, like, Why she have

56:45

a comp stain on her pants? Your elf is

56:48

blowing me.

56:50

Jeez. Get her off. She's

56:53

giving me a handjob. And it's randomly. Fingers crossed. It's

56:55

too good. I can't do it. Her

56:57

pincher elves moved to the next town over

56:59

with the Snoop Doggown. And

57:02

I have to pay monthly. Fuck

57:05

a while. Don't get me started that.

57:07

I know I am. Don't cream

57:10

pie. late

57:11

the women. I'm gonna tell you right

57:13

now. Don't cream pie yourself. I just

57:15

love cream pieing random bitches. Like, just

57:17

And we love to get it. don't get

57:19

me wrong. But then you realize now that

57:21

I'm fucking now that you're buying an

57:24

elf. A female elf. Female

57:26

elf. For fifty dollars. fuck

57:28

mated.

57:28

It's okay. Yeah. It's

57:29

gonna be fun. Yeah. Don't do it. Don't because I

57:31

really I after I had a kid, I remember just,

57:33

like, the first time some chick was, like,

57:35

oh, just coming me. And

57:37

I was like, that's crazy. Like, I

57:40

can't just fucking and you think I would

57:42

do it if it was my idea. But if it's her

57:44

idea, I'm like, alright. She's trying to fucking get

57:46

my And

57:47

this birth control, I don't know.

57:49

I've seen motherfuckers get pregnant on

57:51

an IUD. Really? Yeah.

57:53

Really? Yeah.

57:55

yeah So I really

57:57

don't think it's a good idea these days. Yeah. What a fucking

57:59

voting

57:59

statement it was for you to talk about getting coming

58:02

and you

58:04

just roll your sleeves up and have a bruise. yeah. I'm Things

58:06

get pretty wild at the Smith House. Wanna

58:08

know who came in me last night?

58:11

Boris. Oh,

58:13

road here together. Horace looks

58:16

nervous. That's not true,

58:18

honey. Oh, yeah. Yes. My wife is listening.

58:22

She's not. Yeah, dude. Alright. So tomorrow, I have to do some fun elf

58:24

things. What are some fun elf on the shelf

58:26

ideas? Send me your fun elf

58:28

on the shelf ideas with pictures. This is

58:30

fun, Shannon.

58:32

Right? People either Alf and Shelf It is, and we'll show your elf. I tried to

58:34

do it last year on Legion of Skanks,

58:36

and then Dave got all,

58:38

like, fucking do shouldn't

58:40

fucking do that because he's like a good dad. But I

58:42

was like, we should have a contest where we

58:44

have people that send

58:47

in them tricking their children into believing that they've murdered

58:49

their elves. Oh Maddy gosh. Oh, yeah. The elves is hung

58:52

itself or something. It

58:54

was the the famous one gave me

58:56

the idea that was the the it's like chicken bones on a plate. Oh, it's

58:58

a hat. And then -- That's cute. -- and a

59:00

note from Santa that says I got hungry

59:04

the cookies for dessert. Thanks. And then it's like, yeah, I think it's

59:06

great. Yeah. That's a good way to end it, fully for the

59:08

Eventually, we have to I deal throw a

59:11

swastika on a synagogue. Yes.

59:14

So there it is. Yeah. Oh, wow.

59:16

They have bones. Yeah.

59:18

That they there's

59:20

a better one.

59:23

there's a

59:23

better one in that channel. Thanks for running the

59:25

bit. You

59:25

should make the alpha via

59:28

podcaster. That's a

59:28

good idea. You should make

59:29

it through things like

59:31

you guys do. Okay. Stand up stand up. How can

59:33

I help you? Yeah. My son's fucking school project.

59:35

I'm the fucking mailing for him.

59:36

I mean, it's so funny because, like, it's the dad

59:38

does the entire you know that? Mhmm. yeah,

59:41

that's what's going on. And I never had

59:43

a dad to do my projects. So now I'm

59:45

just like, you know, and I didn't do the

59:47

project altogether. But I'm guiding him into believing

59:49

that this is his project, but

59:51

Yeah. That's fine. What's the project? He so

59:53

they had to they had to

59:55

essentially redesign their desk

59:58

at school to make it, like, better. Right? And then that but

1:00:00

then they had to, like, name it, come up

1:00:02

with a slogan, market it. So

1:00:04

this is, like, right up my alley. I'm, like, oh, I

1:00:06

fucking love

1:00:08

this. Right? So what what I've come up with You're like, you're gonna wanna start an

1:00:10

LLC. Yeah. He thinks he thinks he's

1:00:12

come up with all this stuff. First of all, I fucking made the

1:00:14

model out of cardboard and everything. I work like, I'm

1:00:16

cutting, like, It's a working

1:00:18

drawer and a fucking piece of cardboard.

1:00:20

Chen, I'll I'm gonna send you a fucking I wanna

1:00:22

see. I'll send you a fucking video right now. I'm

1:00:24

pretty sure I have it on video of

1:00:26

it working. Hold on

1:00:28

one second. You know what makes a mini

1:00:30

gas digital studio. James,

1:00:32

first, you're gonna find an older

1:00:35

Jewish classmate investing and just wants to

1:00:37

be around famous people. Here's the

1:00:39

last name. Stein. Yeah.

1:00:42

Here it is. list. Who in your class loves name

1:00:44

dropping and bad music. Here.

1:00:47

There. I'm sending this to Shannon right

1:00:49

now. This is before it's painted, but you'll get

1:00:51

the idea. It's pretty and good.

1:00:53

I'll tell

1:00:54

you that much. Right here, Shannon. Shannon, it's in your email.

1:00:56

miriam Bye.

1:01:00

Bang. Done. Well, still

1:01:01

sending Shannon. Sorry. Yeah. I I never had

1:01:04

anything. Like, all the projects that I had when I was

1:01:06

a little kid, I made them completely by myself. My mom

1:01:08

didn't help me. I remember one time my

1:01:10

uncle Benjie We had a you know,

1:01:12

it was essentially, you know, the time with Derby, but it was different because I talked about my

1:01:14

time with Derby before. I made my time with

1:01:16

Derby. I took the box

1:01:18

right out. I took the the the the

1:01:20

block right out of it, slapped the wheels on,

1:01:22

painted it, that was my car. It's hard to do without

1:01:24

a dad. It's a I mean, what do I

1:01:27

even saw? I Where would I

1:01:29

get a saw? Check off. How do you

1:01:31

round it? I have no idea. Right? So dads are

1:01:33

doing shit like that. I but

1:01:35

they had a plan with Derby for boats and they were

1:01:37

little foam boats. Right. And I waited till

1:01:40

the last minute to do it and you put them on, like,

1:01:42

a a track with water and

1:01:44

you had You gotta

1:01:46

blow your sailboat down the track. on the

1:01:48

boat. It's not like No. No. It's a little a

1:01:50

little model boat. Right? Yeah. And

1:01:53

I remember Here's your wait one second. I'm telling a story, Shannon. Why don't

1:01:55

we wait to fuck in with

1:01:58

the

1:01:58

reveal?

1:01:59

my borders are several Natalie, don't beat

1:02:02

don't

1:02:02

beat yourself up. That's all Shannon's fault. Okay?

1:02:04

But my uncle Benjie, I

1:02:06

did it last minute. I opened up the box, like,

1:02:08

two hours before that we were going. and

1:02:11

we painted it, and it actually looked pretty

1:02:13

cool. And we didn't but we didn't have time to wait

1:02:15

for it to paint. So uncle Benjie

1:02:17

took my mom's I guess this used to be

1:02:19

a thing. It was probably they probably stopped making it

1:02:22

because it was probably, like, toxic or whatever, but

1:02:24

it was nail polish, like,

1:02:26

drier. It like dries. It was spray that would

1:02:28

dry your nails fast, I

1:02:30

guess. Right? Yeah. And we use that

1:02:32

on the boat. Right? And Right. Yeah. He's looking

1:02:34

right at me. I'm like -- Yeah. -- with him. but

1:02:36

we use that on the boat. I don't know. But it reacted with

1:02:38

the foam the chemical reacted with the foam on

1:02:40

the boat, so the boat just started bubbling.

1:02:44

Oh, And it became a big giant foamy. It looked like

1:02:46

a cloud. When there's a shaving pieces

1:02:48

off, it was fucking pathetic. It literally

1:02:50

didn't even float. Oh my god.

1:02:53

his absorbing water once they put it in the water.

1:02:56

They changed the the molecular

1:02:58

structure, whatever the boat was made of. Yeah. That's what

1:03:00

happens when, you know,

1:03:02

the father. what happens? Yeah. Uncle Uncle Benji, who was maybe eighteen. Who

1:03:04

and he was doing his best? He was doing the

1:03:06

best. Yeah. Alright.

1:03:08

are good

1:03:09

Good. Shannon, That looks very good for a

1:03:12

child. No. No. No.

1:03:14

I I mean, like There's a drawer

1:03:18

with little compartments inside. That's cool. Little

1:03:20

compartments inside. Right? So we

1:03:22

named it the Cango Desk because

1:03:24

it's got a little

1:03:26

they got a little pouch pouch. Yeah.

1:03:28

It's got a little pouch. Mhmm. The desk with the little

1:03:31

compartment down under. I thought Cango

1:03:33

was a

1:03:33

slur or something. I

1:03:35

was like, wait. Surely, not

1:03:37

as simple as Dane Kangas. It's

1:03:40

a fucking solid.

1:03:40

Good. Are you gonna you're gonna paint

1:03:43

it? Yeah. We painted it. We we we

1:03:45

came up with a logo. the

1:03:48

slogan.

1:03:48

Fuckin'. It's great. Yeah. See,

1:03:50

he's bringing it in. I I thought I I was like James and I gave him

1:03:52

a whole pitch. I was like, gotta tell him I was like,

1:03:54

you know, like a kangaroo. The most important thing is their

1:03:56

their baby in the pouch to a student. His

1:03:58

most important thing is those

1:03:59

supplies. Knowing they're right there in a

1:04:02

warm place, That little compartment down under kangodex.

1:04:04

Yeah. Oh, bang. His mind was

1:04:06

born. He was like, dad, you're fucking like,

1:04:08

wow. Can you write that

1:04:10

down? Wow. He's

1:04:12

about to murder. I started fucking showing him logos

1:04:14

that we have. I know the teachers because

1:04:16

that's a side table. You

1:04:18

can get it on Wayfair, bitch.

1:04:22

literally every kid's invention is just a

1:04:24

desk with a thing on the side or whatever.

1:04:26

But ours are working drawer. It's

1:04:28

pretty

1:04:28

fucking good. Do you feel competitive with

1:04:30

the other dads? I don't think

1:04:32

You feel

1:04:32

like we're we're in a category one. Right. They

1:04:35

remain competing with us already. Gomez on

1:04:37

now. It didn't matter. And I and I told him. And I was like, James, I was like, they're all desks.

1:04:39

I was like, it's not even the desk is a desk.

1:04:41

They all work compartments. I was like, but it's how

1:04:43

we're marketing this desk. is

1:04:45

gonna fucking separate us from the pack. I was like, James,

1:04:47

who makes a better burger? Your mom or McDonald's? He's like,

1:04:50

mom. I was like, but you know what?

1:04:52

McDonald's is

1:04:52

making billions of dollars, making burgers. Right?

1:04:54

because how they fucking market it. Golden Arches you see. And he was like, dude,

1:04:57

his mind was like, this guy, I saw

1:04:59

him, like, literally, like, falling in love with marketing while

1:05:01

we were doing this project. It

1:05:03

was fucking great. That's good. Yeah. Solid.

1:05:05

Solid stuff, boys. Alright.

1:05:08

We got a little

1:05:09

bit of time left here. little

1:05:12

bit of time left here. We never

1:05:14

saw the the the guitar beauty cup

1:05:16

because fucking Boris, like -- It's

1:05:18

a Carter. -- like a pronounced cutters.

1:05:20

They actually got to a great We got into We got

1:05:23

to a great conversation based off of this. This

1:05:25

is the ADD that we

1:05:27

have. Yeah. No. I don't

1:05:29

think right now.

1:05:30

Anyway, I saw him okay. Alright. I'm gonna say guitar. I swear it's

1:05:32

cutter. Sorry.

1:05:33

Maybe it's cutter.

1:05:35

I don't know.

1:05:37

the My chick was just in

1:05:39

Qatar. Really? Yeah. Yeah. She's a she was

1:05:42

she's

1:05:42

a background dancer for

1:05:46

Latin recording artists that was doing the World Cup, like, the opening show.

1:05:48

That's awesome. Yeah. Did she have a good time, or did

1:05:50

she say it was, like, it was crazy. She has

1:05:52

a she, like, flies like sixteen

1:05:54

hours does a show and then gets on a flight the next day. Doesn't see anything

1:05:56

just Yeah. It's just, yeah, in and out. So

1:05:58

it's a a little different, but it's still pretty fucking

1:06:02

cool. But nothing

1:06:04

about Qatar Carter. I'm my client

1:06:06

Carter. We're not Come on. Where to god? It's called

1:06:08

Qatar. Qatar. You'd send him over back

1:06:10

to him. And jeez, and it's

1:06:12

saying that it's called Color. And those are

1:06:14

the hacks. It's the face to want to hear it.

1:06:16

Oh. People in the live China are

1:06:18

saying, Desiree was obviously a better

1:06:20

name and it just My

1:06:22

god. Deskeru is

1:06:24

a great man.

1:06:26

Pretty good. Deskeru. Deskeru is a

1:06:28

And it's a better slur too. These

1:06:31

fucking Deskeros. Deskeros.

1:06:34

Sorry. Yeah. Deskeros is a

1:06:36

solid name. But you know what? Canger

1:06:39

desk is great too. You should make a desk all

1:06:41

I can get desk up. goes on top of the

1:06:44

desk called the the

1:06:46

jelly. Oh.

1:06:48

That's like a panda desk. She's like You know what it be? No,

1:06:50

dude. The king of desk, the

1:06:52

drawer comes out, and that's your

1:06:54

book bag, and that's the Joey.

1:06:57

That's the the next iteration of the king of desk.

1:07:00

That that slides out, and it's actually

1:07:02

you're bringing home like a like a case we

1:07:04

throw it on your

1:07:06

fucking back. Joey. That's the fucking Joey. passenger

1:07:08

baggage. The Deskuru can be

1:07:10

the bigger version for the parents.

1:07:14

We copy this. For one

1:07:15

for twelve payments of We're gonna need a

1:07:17

lot more credit card. There's a chat

1:07:19

for the win. Chase

1:07:23

Davis says Maddie has a surprisingly good ass. So

1:07:25

let's fucking go,

1:07:27

dude. Yeah. She's

1:07:29

down, bro. Chase.

1:07:30

Chase me, bitch. Now

1:07:32

they're doing now they're doing

1:07:36

fakes of

1:07:36

your ass and they did not choose a flattering

1:07:38

one? They did not. Yeah. That's okay.

1:07:41

What are you gonna

1:07:42

do? That

1:07:43

was probably just my own. because I don't think

1:07:46

that's right. Can I can we see these this

1:07:48

guitar camel

1:07:50

beauty contest? Yes. So first, I'm gonna show

1:07:51

you the winner because this one I can identify

1:07:53

by its ribbon. So apparently,

1:07:56

they they

1:07:58

can tell the

1:07:58

quality of them

1:07:59

based on their ear placement, body size,

1:08:02

and their lips. It's not

1:08:04

the

1:08:05

hump. No. Well,

1:08:06

I guess maybe that's part of the body size. And apparently, so there's

1:08:09

a sixty six million dollars total

1:08:11

in prizes that people can

1:08:13

win with their camels. And

1:08:15

then also before they go into each contest, they x-ray the

1:08:17

camels because people have surgically

1:08:19

altered them or they use

1:08:21

fillers and stuff like that to change

1:08:24

appear

1:08:24

to the camp. You gotta go to Dominican

1:08:26

Republic at that fat camp. No. They they

1:08:28

could actually adopt their fucking camp.

1:08:29

The women can't even get pillars there. Okay. They can't even

1:08:31

wear makeup. Oh, these are the camel's got more

1:08:34

rights than the women. tax. What the

1:08:36

hell? Current camel's are pronounced

1:08:37

lips or preferred black and colored dress.

1:08:39

Two and dry.

1:08:40

the camels are the Kardashians, which -- --

1:08:42

cutter. -- which has

1:08:43

led to the use of Botox by

1:08:44

which has led to use of botox by

1:08:47

Cheaters. Oh, man. The camel's

1:08:48

got some Can we see some

1:08:50

can we see some Botox? They have

1:08:53

there

1:08:53

is one here.

1:08:55

This is my they used so

1:08:57

much Botox that it just exploded. Oh, for example. That's just

1:09:00

I mean, it's

1:09:03

almost not funny. Lewis what

1:09:05

you're both The camera was,

1:09:07

like, almost the camera's almost not fucking me. He's greatest lips of me trying. Oh,

1:09:14

no. Huckleberry. Huckleberry. Huckleberry. This camel won't

1:09:20

float down. And

1:09:22

then there is video of this. That was about official love palette. That's horrifying. There is video of just the competition

1:09:24

overall if you wanna see a

1:09:25

little bit. Let's see. I wanna see

1:09:27

it. This is

1:09:28

Luis is

1:09:31

literally what I would say, and, like, a a racist joke about

1:09:33

these people. But Yeah. Like, what do you have

1:09:35

a couple of people? If you have a couple of beauty contests,

1:09:37

you have That's how many channels, it's gonna be a bunch

1:09:39

of guys in sandals and white

1:09:41

dresses walking cam camels around? Yes. That was a big ass. They're three years

1:09:44

old. That is a pretty that's a

1:09:46

beautiful camel right there. But, Olin, is it

1:09:48

a beauty or

1:09:50

is it hold on a time out. Can I be Was it

1:09:53

for a second, Shannon?

1:09:55

What's the difference between

1:09:57

this in the Westminster Dog Show? Is it not

1:09:59

the same? It's a little bigger. You're just calling it

1:10:01

a beauty contest, or is it a fucking

1:10:03

camel show? Are

1:10:04

we being racist by saying that these

1:10:06

these fucking Arabs like their beauty contest with their camels.

1:10:09

That's racism. Don't they call it that, though?

1:10:11

Yeah.

1:10:11

It was the title of the article.

1:10:13

What is the article? They talk

1:10:15

about that. Let me pullback out of this.

1:10:17

It's a hold

1:10:18

on. But like normal people here don't have beauty contests

1:10:20

for

1:10:22

dogs either, you know. I live with those dog shows? Yeah. Yeah. But I'm saying

1:10:24

those aren't normal does that have you been

1:10:26

to a dog show? No. But I wasn't one

1:10:28

last

1:10:28

night. Did you really? I

1:10:30

watched the talk the toys Alright.

1:10:33

I stand. I watched the little the

1:10:35

little dog one. Okay. It's still Oh, I thought you were at comedy fight club. ugly

1:10:39

bunch of milk. I laugh at logic cards. I graduated

1:10:42

out of that one.

1:10:44

So they call it

1:10:47

Camo Beauty World cup. camo beauty

1:10:49

world job. Yeah. Fuck it. Get mad

1:10:51

madder and say chihuahua. Whoa. Whoa.

1:10:57

Alright, Shannon. Let's do one final segment. I gotta get out of here kinda quickly. But

1:10:59

let's go with guess what

1:11:04

words mean.

1:11:04

the urine

1:11:13

He

1:11:18

speaks like

1:11:20

It's not my it's

1:11:22

not even my first language. Yeah. But you speak multiple in writing. Guess

1:11:24

what words

1:11:25

mean? You probably know, like, the origins of shit, and that's how it that's

1:11:27

what this all about. Right. I understand. Not Really?

1:11:31

No. I didn't know that. No. How

1:11:32

are they I'm saying I'm

1:11:34

saying

1:11:34

no in Spanish over and over again. Okay.

1:11:40

Let's see, Shannon. What it what's the

1:11:41

first word that we to guess what it means?

1:11:43

First word is

1:11:44

where it is Pena

1:11:46

phobia. Pena

1:11:48

phobia. Pena?

1:11:49

PENIA

1:11:53

phobia the center of honey phobia.

1:11:56

Pena pasta. Well, that

1:11:56

is a fear around

1:11:57

Oh, yes. Is it a fear of penis? Is it a fear of pennies?

1:11:59

I'm gonna I'm

1:11:59

gonna tell

1:12:02

you, like, fear of sweating. Oh, so the pineal gland. Yeah. As

1:12:04

a percent of what Jews

1:12:06

have. No pineal gland isn't for

1:12:08

your eyes. Oh, is it? The pineal

1:12:10

gland is the third eye. Okay. So

1:12:13

fear the fear of being it's worse with

1:12:15

you. saturated Boris makes his games suck. No. But you that's not

1:12:17

even the dork thing. That's like, you

1:12:19

you ever do DMT? Like,

1:12:22

all the Alex gray shit. It's all like

1:12:24

the pineal gland shit right here. Okay. So That's

1:12:26

where your brain makes hallucinogens that are

1:12:29

triggered. So it's a mixture of hallucinogens? Maybe

1:12:31

it's fear of a fear of awareness. Yeah. Yeah. I would I

1:12:33

would say something like that, like a

1:12:35

fear of, like, a

1:12:38

spirituality Maddy type thing.

1:12:40

Yeah. Pena. Yeah.

1:12:41

I'm going to

1:12:42

background. Alright, Chen. What do you say? It is a

1:12:44

archon what he said

1:12:46

fear of

1:12:48

poverty. Oh,

1:12:48

wow. Okay. So fear of

1:12:50

a weirdness, kindness. Alright. What's the next

1:12:54

one, Shannon? Tea's whole. I

1:12:56

Wait. Can we but can we understand what

1:12:58

that what that That's how how Maddie got on MTV. Can we or or that's what it means about?

1:13:01

What's the Penny apart

1:13:03

that means poverty? That's

1:13:05

it means lack or deficiency. It's

1:13:07

we're not at school right now. We're trying to learn. We're trying to learn. We've got penile,

1:13:11

penile, penile,

1:13:12

cameo We'll

1:13:15

talk

1:13:15

about it later. I believe we're not

1:13:17

with insurance. check out addiction later.

1:13:19

T's hold. Wait. What

1:13:22

was

1:13:23

it? T's hold. spelling?

1:13:24

TEASE

1:13:27

pull. t's pull. Really

1:13:29

not that.

1:13:30

What? Man, he's like,

1:13:33

Yeah. That's my that's my wild and out name. Oh, so that's what that's

1:13:35

what that is in Buchanan's phone is. It's

1:13:40

been has an

1:13:42

IUD. No interest. Cheese hole. It's a cheese. IUD for the

1:13:45

cat and stands for,

1:13:47

are you dead? Is

1:13:50

it the hole that you look through in a Peep Show? And

1:13:54

you I don't.

1:13:58

That's what my guess is. The hole you look through at the

1:13:59

Peep Show, the t's hole.

1:14:01

I think it's the top it's the top

1:14:03

hole of a sewing needle. Mm-mm.

1:14:05

It's a top hole in

1:14:07

a pussy. It's where they pee at. That's

1:14:10

a good guess. That's the vagina. Damn. Please

1:14:12

hold.

1:14:14

III feel like it's gonna be

1:14:16

something we don't see common. Let's say, what

1:14:18

is it?

1:14:18

Oh, it Boris didn't Yeah.

1:14:20

I mean, I would guess like a beep

1:14:22

show type thing. I mean, I don't know what the fuck else I could be. No.

1:14:24

It's I'm

1:14:24

so and shit. Mhmm. It's a so

1:14:27

it's that opening of a glass

1:14:29

maker's furnace where the

1:14:31

fuel

1:14:31

Of course. Mhmm.

1:14:33

Okay. Alright. Shannon, next one.

1:14:36

Jacqueline.

1:14:36

i'm jackie late

1:14:39

dracula Jacqueline. e

1:14:40

ejaculate, but no

1:14:41

e. Right? Mhmm. Okay. ejaculate. So e ejaculators where you

1:14:43

come you come

1:14:45

you com

1:14:47

What's the e after? E

1:14:49

jacket. E jacket. E jacket.

1:14:51

E jacket. For everyone. Boris

1:14:55

is ejaculate just the making of the com? Maybe?

1:14:58

ejaculate. That's

1:14:59

Oh, are we

1:15:00

talking about ejaculate? It's a

1:15:02

ejaculate because each ejaculate can also

1:15:05

not really No problem.

1:15:07

It's like Yeah. for my the the

1:15:09

jacket would

1:15:11

seat. Yeah. So to

1:15:14

ejaculate is to strap in, strap on? Like,

1:15:16

it's the opposite. No. I thought I

1:15:19

could be totally wrong. I've

1:15:21

got it. It's a settlement for processing.

1:15:23

Oh, okay. Okay. because they're ejaculating. Right. Just

1:15:25

ejaculate a guy, like, ejaculate,

1:15:27

like, ejaculate, went up

1:15:30

a little What if it's like Jack? Jack you late. Well,

1:15:32

fuck up. It's a park guy. Yeah.

1:15:34

It's a collater. An on time

1:15:37

black guy. Jack you late. I'm gonna say it's the noun

1:15:39

what you ejaculate. You ejaculate.

1:15:42

No. No. It's ejaculate.

1:15:46

It's ejaculate. Alright. This is Alright. What

1:15:48

is this, Shannon? It is

1:15:49

the act of throwing or jostling

1:15:52

something around. Well

1:15:54

Oh, we're ejaculating. Yeah.

1:15:56

That was a trick. The boys on

1:15:58

the backyard ejaculating. Just

1:15:59

some ejaculate.

1:16:01

got your dracula We'll

1:16:03

ask one, Shannon. Jirchenhead.

1:16:04

Jirchenhead. It's JERKINEGAD

1:16:06

Jirchenhead.

1:16:12

Jirchenhead? Pass

1:16:13

my lube. Pass the

1:16:15

jerk and

1:16:15

head. Jerke and head.

1:16:17

Jerke and head. Jerke

1:16:20

and head. turkey

1:16:20

and head. It's a town in Sweden. It does sound like a place.

1:16:23

Right? We got a jerk and head It's actually pronounced jerk

1:16:25

and head. It sounds like a

1:16:27

chain in the south. Oh,

1:16:30

we got a jerk and hat

1:16:31

girl. I'll see a jerk and hat tonight.

1:16:33

They got two for one

1:16:34

appetizers. Alright. What does it

1:16:36

do? I'll feed them like a jerk

1:16:39

and head. And Jerkin? Yeah. Third

1:16:40

beer. That's who? That's me.

1:16:42

That's my order. That's Michael Jackson's

1:16:44

plea time. Twist and nipples.

1:16:46

Twist and channels. Trkin had

1:16:48

Give me one guess. I'm gonna

1:16:50

say the jerk in head is the lower level of a boat. Okay. That's

1:16:53

just a very

1:16:54

good, like, you know, Let's

1:16:58

try. Yeah. Get down to the jerk

1:17:00

and head. Get down to the jerk and head. And

1:17:02

start shoveling coal. Yeah. In that line, I'm gonna say

1:17:04

it's like a base camp. did

1:17:06

call on boats? Does that have boats become? It depends on the boat. I mean, the Titanic. They were Yeah. don't

1:17:08

call.

1:17:10

there so Yeah.

1:17:12

That's what

1:17:13

we should've that's what we should've done in my little

1:17:15

fucking boat. We should just use cold instead of wind of

1:17:19

nail polish. Okay.

1:17:23

So what is it? What is the

1:17:25

jacket? It

1:17:25

is a a roof that's leveled

1:17:27

or squared at

1:17:29

the top. Daddy

1:17:32

wins. How a painting. We're part of

1:17:34

a painting. Okay. A roof. Get up. Santa is on the jerking head. We're done.

1:17:36

Elph on a Elph on a

1:17:38

jerking head. We learned a lot.

1:17:40

We're we're out,

1:17:42

guys. Thanks for watching. We'll be back on Friday with another great Who's

1:17:48

on Friday? column

1:17:48

and -- Why is it? -- column

1:17:50

and six. because It should be lit. Yeah. Yeah. Alright. We're out. Thanks, guys. Peace. Peace.

1:17:55

That's all,

1:18:00

folks.

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