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CMXXXIX. Good Eye Mate (Mickey Gall And Gerard Michaels)

CMXXXIX. Good Eye Mate (Mickey Gall And Gerard Michaels)

Released Monday, 2nd January 2023
Good episode? Give it some love!
CMXXXIX. Good Eye Mate (Mickey Gall And Gerard Michaels)

CMXXXIX. Good Eye Mate (Mickey Gall And Gerard Michaels)

CMXXXIX. Good Eye Mate (Mickey Gall And Gerard Michaels)

CMXXXIX. Good Eye Mate (Mickey Gall And Gerard Michaels)

Monday, 2nd January 2023
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Do you have a product or business that you wanna

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1:03

gas digital podcasts, we'll right now

1:06

go to the ad side dot com and

1:08

click on the advertiser's button for more

1:10

information. Fill her up.

1:13

You're listening to the Cash Digital Network.

1:23

What up, all the fuckers. It's the real ass

1:25

podcast. Hey, Golly, Louis Shea Gomez.

1:27

Where did my thank for the last dude, ultimate minority,

1:29

joint Abercrombie. I got a lot of names. International

1:32

Superstore zachamico. Hey, do buddy.

1:34

Funny. He's a psycho. You know what I mean?

1:36

Dude, I would double payment this chick with her husband.

1:38

Now he's selling Coke in heaven. Are you fucking

1:41

ready motherfuckers? Is there only

1:43

real podcast left out there?

1:50

Yeah, baby boys. I did two boys in Shanghai,

1:53

almost bordering around say king of things, a point

1:55

on a podcasting. We are

1:57

here on a Friday with

1:59

pre tape action on Friday. I'm on my way to Los

2:01

Angeles, California right now to celebrate New Year's

2:03

Eve. Hopefully, you guys got those tickets.

2:05

Come see me and Dave with me and or do

2:08

we give us thanks on Sunday New Year's Day. That's

2:10

all happened in Los Angeles this weekend. The

2:12

show is jiffy sold out at this point.

2:15

Seven thirty show on on New Year's Eve. There's

2:17

a lot of tickets for, so don't worry about that.

2:19

You can get into that one baby boy. As

2:21

always, I am with the international superstar,

2:24

Zach. Amico, what's up? Good morning, buddy. How

2:26

are you, man? Doing pretty good, man. Very happy about

2:28

the two guests we have on the show today. From

2:30

the slick and thick podcast, which is a brand

2:32

new addition here on the gas digital network.

2:34

Very excited to have these gentlemen joining us

2:36

here on the show and on the network long

2:39

time friend of the show. The great

2:41

Mickey Gall is back on the show.

2:44

And a very new friend, but soon

2:46

to be a longtime friend, the great Gerard

2:49

Michaels is back on the show. Oh,

2:51

y'all. Thank

2:53

you. I like your breathing.

2:55

That was good. Yeah. Very Jamaican

2:58

inspired. That's right. Yeah. It was

3:00

actually

3:00

So we're the newest podcast.

3:01

We're the newest You're the newest podcast. We're

3:04

we're launching another I'm launching another

3:06

show. In January

3:07

as well as you got, but it's

3:08

on a podcast. I'm watching a new the

3:11

the next iteration of of roast battles

3:13

called spit roast.

3:13

Nice. And

3:14

it's a roasting competition. These

3:15

guys, yelling at a girl in the middle of yeah.

3:17

It's essentially it's it's rape. But,

3:20

you know, it's really it's just it's

3:22

Right. Right. It's not good

3:25

for anyone. He's two

3:27

guys and a girl whose dad really fucked up.

3:29

Well, We we actually have Zachimico

3:31

and Aaronberg in the first spit roast

3:33

battle at the stand on January

3:35

eleventh. So that that's coming as well. We have

3:37

a couple other things, you know, in the works. But

3:40

you guys are officially the only new

3:42

podcast that we've announced

3:43

just so far. Yeah. So far. So we're very

3:45

excited for you guys. We've cut some pretty fucking dope

3:47

episode I'm not I've heard a great

3:49

thing. Not gonna lie. We've done some pretty cool shit.

3:51

We've got a a guard from Guantanamo

3:53

Bay who got out of the guy

3:56

out of the military and wanted to kill

3:57

himself. He's one of our first cast, great, great,

3:59

great, dude, great story. We got a bunch of really

4:01

fucking cool shit. I'm excited to

4:03

make it all And look, we got a great show plan

4:05

today. It is the real ass podcast number

4:07

nine thirty nine, Wow shit. We're approaching episode

4:09

one thousand. Episode one thousand will be a very,

4:11

very big deal. Very, very big

4:13

I I've never I've never, you know,

4:16

made a big deal about anniversaried shows before. That's not

4:18

a big deal to me. This one Shannon we're

4:20

gonna fucking go and we're gonna do some crazy shit. So

4:22

sending your ideas, what do you wanna see us

4:24

do for our one thousandth

4:26

episode of the Real Last podcast? We've been in the

4:28

show a very, very long time. But let's do our

4:30

plugs. Let's get them out of the way right now. Mickey,

4:33

Gerard, obviously the slick and thick podcast

4:35

you guys can subscribe on iTunes, YouTube

4:37

all these other platforms.

4:37

Right? Obviously, it will be on gas digital starting

4:40

in January. What else you plugging?

4:42

Shit. What else you plugging? Dog

4:43

When you were just on Chaz Palmodaries Podcast.

4:46

I'm a be on it next week. Chaz is a great

4:48

fun day. Tomorrow. It's a great day to check out.

4:50

Check

4:50

out Instagram am, Gerrard, don't

4:53

give a fuck, Gerrard, DGAF. Mickey

4:55

Gawl, we got all our stuff on there, and that's probably

4:57

the best way to go. Social media is I'm on

4:59

TikTok. He's not he's on Twitter. I'm

5:01

not, you

5:01

know, follow us there. Stick it thick

5:03

and stay in touch with everything that we got

5:05

going on. I love it.

5:06

Thank you.

5:07

January twenty second catalyst wrestling

5:09

will be at the Bell House in Brooklyn coming up.

5:11

It's my birthday.

5:13

I'll be there. Oh. Catalyst

5:15

wrestling? Yeah. That's right.

5:17

So

5:17

I the Al Snow was a good friend of mine. I actually

5:20

was on I reped his

5:22

clothing brand,

5:22

Collarinobo, on a legion of skanks on

5:25

a Monday. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Well, look,

5:27

guys. I got a lot of life stuff coming up this

5:29

weekend, Los Angeles. Then Amit

5:31

and Zach will be in Washington DC January

5:33

fifth or

5:33

seventh, gather seconds for DC

5:35

comedy. Something or

5:37

other. You guys are gonna be at DC

5:38

January sixth? Yeah. Yeah. We're celebrating

5:41

big plant. Yeah. We're celebrating the

5:44

Insurrection. The the peaceful

5:46

protest. The Germans are there

5:48

for the interaction. Right. Right. Were you really?

5:50

No. I should have

5:51

been, though. You really should have. You're really good for

5:53

it. Direction vibes. Yeah.

5:54

I would you know, I wasn't a member of the FBI

5:57

though, so I wasn't invited. I

5:59

think you're right. Look, we

6:01

have a lot of other stuff coming up as well. Limus

6:03

of steaks dot com, Goodby Phoenix, Goodbyton,

6:06

Minnesota, Kiahoga Falls, and many

6:08

other dates coming up. It's not added to the

6:10

website, but I got houston coming up the spring, Yonkers,

6:12

San Diego, and many many

6:14

other places. All the place to me and Aaron didn't go. I'm

6:16

gonna be hitting with, hopefully, with on

6:18

most of those shows. So come out to those shows.

6:20

Make sure you guys subscribe, you guys subscribe, you guys, digital

6:22

network dot com. Use the promo code RAP

6:25

Get a seven day free trial kit that's in access to

6:27

the On Demand library for all of the shows here on the

6:29

network. Realized Bocky has almost a thousand

6:31

episodes now that you can get ad free uncensored

6:33

and in one place There

6:36

we are. And

6:39

subscribe to my twitch channel. Twitch dot tv slash

6:41

pure rattlesnake. I've been giving away

6:44

gang fest tickets. If you can stream snipe me and

6:46

kill me in Warzone, that's happened now a

6:48

bunch, and I've switched to a wheel prizes. So

6:50

you're gonna spin on a wheel of prizes if you can do it. It's very

6:52

easy to kill me. I'm not good at the game.

6:54

So it's a very it's a whole other element. What do you

6:56

think about

6:56

Twitch? Man. Is is that still going on? Is

6:57

that still pop off? Yeah. People's still doing like, people

7:00

are going crazy. Yeah. I I don't pop off when I

7:02

only get, like, fifty to a hundred people that watch my

7:04

streams, but that's still actually

7:06

fairly sizable. He's pretty good. So,

7:08

yeah, switch that TV slash be around a

7:09

snake. It's pretty fun. I enjoy it. I enjoy playing

7:11

some video again. That's why I'm late today. I'm kidding.

7:14

Traffic. Actually,

7:16

I enjoyed on your Instagram

7:19

when you were that was Twitch. Right?

7:21

We're we're going around

7:21

and, like, you're making the guys into their

7:24

pockets.

7:24

Yeah. I ran the guy's pockets.

7:25

He's running pockets. He's fucking yeah.

7:28

Yeah. Getting getting rods from little kids. Little

7:30

children. Little kids, I feel bad. I give them

7:32

a chance live every time. You

7:33

let him live. I was happy, dude. I was honorable. I'm not

7:35

gonna kill these little children. But Yeah.

7:37

You

7:37

if you can find me in the game and stream tonight me, I

7:39

will scream like a girl and run from you.

7:42

That's

7:42

the best

7:42

How many Skanks episodes

7:43

do you guys at? I don't know. I

7:46

don't know. Like, more or less

7:48

than I think it's less than probably eight

7:50

hundred. Well, we do this three times a

7:51

week. There's been times where we were only doing skanks

7:54

once a week. We've got it twice a week. So

7:56

but, yeah, I've been podcasting for quite some

7:58

time. Monday's episode was 709

8:00

Well, 709 Well, I I

8:02

for one was horrified by last night's

8:04

podcast. Yeah. It was a It's horrifying. Wild

8:06

guy. We did the

8:08

porn dead porn star Olympics. And we

8:10

Yeah. Like, what did they have for us today? The fucking

8:13

gay hooker dance off? It wasn't good. It

8:15

wasn't it wasn't it was it was

8:17

not for the faint of heart. Go enjoy that episode.

8:20

Look, we have a lot to talk about on today's

8:22

show. Look, we have we

8:24

always do people watch on the

8:26

show,

8:28

because The musical --

8:30

No. No. No. No. The dogs. Of course. the murder

8:33

dogs.

8:33

Yeah. The minor the minor dogs. Yeah. The ones that

8:35

are eating children the over your

8:36

life. Yeah. Yeah. So I

8:39

there was another Pippel attachment. What happened

8:41

here? Ods on video. Okay.

8:47

So what happened was

8:49

Baham,

8:49

I'm gonna give you guys the rights today.

8:52

No. No. We'll get we'll get a

8:54

copyright stricken on YouTube. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

8:56

Alright.

8:59

Fuck yeah. Fuck yeah. Fuck

9:03

yeah.

9:04

I like it. So good

9:06

morning. So what happened with this

9:08

dog? Okay. So it was during

9:10

recess, about one o'clock in the afternoon

9:12

in Missouri, and the

9:14

kids were playing how

9:16

old were these kids?

9:17

Between fifth and sixth grade.

9:18

Oh, these poor kids. Yeah. And there was,

9:21

like, teachers out there and

9:23

staff. And then two of the neighbor's

9:25

pitbull got

9:25

loose, ran into the school yard, and

9:28

then twenty one people in total were

9:30

injured. I mean, we when a kid when a two

9:32

people run into a school playground with all those

9:34

kids, that's like us running into a Chinese

9:36

buffet. I'm like, wow, dude. It's all you can

9:38

eat. You just fucking go to town. I mean,

9:40

I don't know. Exactly. wasn't

9:42

good. But if you really look at it from the pimples

9:44

perspective, it was quite the feast. Yeah.

9:46

Sounds like a blast. Yeah. From

9:48

the

9:48

pimples perspective, it was what maybe the best of

9:51

their life. Yeah. How come, like, the Shark

9:53

Week people never come out and

9:55

defend the pit bulls like they defend sharks? You

9:57

ever watch Shark Week and they're like, somebody loses

9:59

their leg and they're like, well, the shark was just

10:01

trying to taste me to see what I was like with

10:02

everything. You are you are you are swimming

10:05

in their habitat. A a

10:07

shark. Like, if you get eaten by a shark

10:09

for the most

10:09

part, you fucked up. It's only the Puerto Rican's

10:12

next door don't have a shark to cut one.

10:14

Yeah. Yeah. If you get this a

10:16

shark. You were fucking around.

10:17

Yeah. It did. Like you like, we live we

10:19

live in South Florida with the Cubans, bro.

10:21

They got shows. Pipples are in our

10:24

habitat. It's not like your happening.

10:26

You're not jumping into a

10:26

pitbull, fucking fighting pit, and getting

10:29

attacked.

10:29

Yeah. But pitbull -- scared were fucking inherently

10:32

dangerous. -- dangerous. There is trained to be

10:34

dangerous. I'm I've no pit that are the softest

10:36

puppies of all time? Yep. Probably, put

10:38

until until something

10:39

happens. Until something

10:41

happens. And then they have they

10:43

have death jaws that can fucking eat

10:45

your baby. I got a friend, an ex teammate

10:47

of mine who hates the

10:49

segment with every fiber's being his name

10:51

is

10:51

Chad, and he's part of teen floppy

10:54

ears.

10:54

Team floppy ears.

10:55

Who's who's actually, I think, advocated

10:58

against the segment online. So You

11:00

can't you can't -- Yeah. -- just you

11:03

can't just

11:04

give it a cute pin pull to these

11:06

baby eating demons. You can't

11:08

just call them fucking puppy

11:10

puppy eyes and fucking now

11:12

they're they're

11:13

now, am I walking jaws? I love them.

11:15

They're not -- Right.

11:15

-- I'm not saying to get of

11:18

people's pimples, I'm saying, let the breed

11:20

die

11:20

off. That's what I'm saying. The

11:22

Puerto Ricans? No. Oh.

11:25

It was

11:28

actually racist. No. I

11:30

say, let the breeze die off in twenty years. You got

11:32

no more pimples. We had no more pimple

11:33

problems. That's

11:35

all I'm saying. So are

11:37

You know, without killing without killing a single

11:39

peeple, all you gotta do is

11:41

fucking not breathe

11:42

about Bay. Yes. It's not You're you're with the

11:44

Barrick Barrick's Bay and utero Pipals. Is

11:46

that the Is that the

11:47

Oh, it says He said last name

11:50

is Barrick I mean, Jesus Christ, the man knows what he's

11:52

talking about. That's it, man. You you

11:54

feel real you you're really this anti pit

11:56

bull. It's something I'm anti pit

11:57

bull. I just have a I care more about

11:59

children than I hear about pimples. I find it hard

12:01

to believe. I really do. I swear to

12:04

God, I

12:04

do. You know? And it's not being anti pimple.

12:06

Uh-huh. You know, why do you have a pimple?

12:08

No, I don't, but I do. I know people

12:10

that do, and they're always very sweet dogs. I feel like

12:13

they're trained poorly. I like any other

12:15

dog would be trained

12:15

poorly. A doberman pincher, or a while

12:18

or, you know,

12:18

like, he didn't he didn't say a

12:20

government picture or a while ago. Correct? He

12:22

literally flubbed both

12:23

of those

12:23

words yet. I wasn't paying attention. You said

12:26

doberman and then you said Is it not

12:27

doberman? Is it doberman with a brief? Doberman. Yeah.

12:30

I'm

12:30

sorry. But I'm

12:30

I I

12:31

picked up. Yeah. I

12:33

I I'm I'm

12:34

lags on my Germany. You're in the sorry.

12:37

Sorry Uberman, Chad. My I'm lags on

12:39

my Germany. But the yeah.

12:41

So the doberman

12:42

Pinchers, which I've never seen live

12:45

only on TV. Yeah. Rotweiler.

12:47

Now that's a bad motherfucker.

12:48

Never been

12:48

up against a Rockweller. My next door neighbor had a

12:50

crazy Rockweller actually had to get put down. That

12:53

fucking thing is them. That's I'd be way more

12:55

scared of a Rockweller. Yeah. I had a Rockweller tech my Jack Russell

12:57

terrier in front of me. And I opened his fucking

12:59

death jaws up and took my dog out of his mouth. At a

13:00

boy. Yeah. But that Jack Russell

13:03

terrier was a dick. Razed by

13:05

Michael Vick is more dangerous than a Rockwell

13:07

raised by

13:07

you. That's not true.

13:08

That's not true. To a baby,

13:10

baby. Because it's it's

13:12

about even You're tired

13:14

of just spirit

13:16

had you not taken care of the

13:19

sport

13:19

issue. Did he say he used to just run it James

13:21

like a Jabber? What we would do is he would try

13:23

to he would he would run like, we had

13:25

the baby in the crib and he would jump

13:27

And, you know, Jack Monsa Terre is a sort of a pointy,

13:30

strong -- Mhmm. -- but he would create, like, a

13:32

spirit of his

13:33

body, and he would try to go through my

13:35

son's chest. And then you're trying

13:36

to reverse alien. Yeah. You're trying to

13:39

murder him. He's gonna be a With the edge

13:41

spear. Yeah. Be a spearting him with

13:43

his

13:43

pause. And I we had to stop that

13:45

many a time. So you wanna live in a world with

13:47

nothing

13:47

but pugs? Is that the idea? Look,

13:50

look, I'm not saying I wanna live in a world with

13:52

anything. I'm just saying all too and we do segment.

13:54

And Shannon, by the

13:55

way, Shannon, I will give you a free

13:58

range Mickey. Calm the fuck down. I

14:00

mean, I get some new liquids

14:01

over here. Yeah.

14:02

You're fucking. This guy a fucking

14:04

liquid asshole.

14:05

Yeah. Holy

14:05

cow. He has a torn annulus. What do

14:08

what do you have a torn? What's wrong with your background

14:10

now? No. I had a bad herniated

14:11

disc I've had for, like, three years. And, like,

14:13

bad

14:13

bad. I

14:13

just got surgery five days ago, five days.

14:16

Wow. Yeah. Probably shouldn't be here.

14:18

You imagine it was motherfucker competing in

14:20

the UFC with the bad motherfuckers

14:22

on planner with a broken ass back. I

14:23

know. Wild, man.

14:25

Wow, crazy.

14:26

I'm a real

14:26

bad ass guy. He's a he's a real ass dude.

14:29

That is real last dude. Real last

14:31

podcast. That's that's Just take the name of your

14:33

podcast show. Yeah. That's what my name. That's my podcast.

14:35

Podcast. Sorry. Look. Let's see.

14:37

What else going on here? So, Shannon twenty

14:39

twenty two is coming to an end. This is kind of

14:41

interesting. I always have an appreciation for

14:43

criminals. I have an appreciation for people that

14:45

are a little bit you know,

14:47

that that -- But the

14:48

-- -- diabetes. -- a little disobedient. Well,

14:50

it's just they make their own rules. They make their

14:52

own path, you know. And I I feel like if you can get

14:54

away with it, you can get away with it, you know, just,

14:56

you know, It's like cheating on a test. That's a

14:58

different skill than

15:00

studying for a test. How I got a degree. Me

15:02

too. It's it's the the I wouldn't have graduated

15:04

high school. I had not cheated all the time. But

15:07

getting away with cheating is a whole

15:09

other like thing. It's not that

15:11

easy. Yeah. It's just it's sort

15:13

of a different skill that I worked on, which

15:15

was you

15:15

know, getting people to let me get their

15:17

homework. Like, that's a thing. And

15:18

then you get the tickets that are, like, no. You're, like,

15:21

dude. Art of me a stranger. Art of me a

15:23

stranger. Art of

15:25

way is

15:25

it? I would have this one.

15:25

Yes. I would I would never have a pencil. I would never have a

15:28

number two pencil. Then I I'd be like, hey, does

15:30

anybody have a number two pencil? And these assholes would be

15:31

like, no. You should have brought your own pencil. I was

15:34

like, I You're lucky on

15:36

me even

15:36

though I'll kill you. Yeah. I mean, it's just

15:38

fucking crazy. Like, these

15:39

people are fucking real well, it's really, really

15:42

stingy, but they're fucking pencils. I've never

15:43

had that problem. Never had that problem. You're a big guy, though.

15:45

You just fucking grab him by their head. Cool pencil

15:48

bro. Yeah. Now it's my pencil.

15:49

Yeah. Like

15:50

the kids who like they like if you're like, they

15:52

see you copying, like, go, like, It's like Flip

15:54

that arm. It's crazy. Yeah. I mean What what

15:56

what what never seen a number one pencil

15:58

or a number that what are these

15:59

pencils? Oh,

16:00

a seinfeld bit. Right. Is this Santos

16:02

a bit? No. But it sounds like yeah.

16:04

What's with with the number two pencil? What what

16:07

what is I've only seen number

16:09

two

16:09

pencils. True. And the number two petzel is the

16:11

best petzel. Now let's give credit reports to the tycom.

16:14

Is Dixon. Tycom Doroga is the

16:16

Ferrari of Petsels.

16:16

That's Natalie is about to come in with Do do

16:19

people even write anymore? Does anybody know how

16:21

to write the hardness of graphite cores

16:23

off and marked on the pencil? Look for

16:25

a number such as two two and a half

16:27

or

16:27

three, the higher the number, the harder, the

16:29

writing core, and the lighter

16:31

the mark left. If you wrote in cursive, do

16:33

you think your son could read it?

16:34

Ma'am. Yeah. He wants to stay current. Yeah.

16:36

Yeah. He's still no current. Shit.

16:38

Fuck. Fuck. Shandings

16:43

are the top five where Trump's committed in twenty twenty

16:45

two. Let me say.

16:50

Florida bride bride

16:53

allegedly faces wedding

16:55

fruit.

16:56

Leases.

16:57

Look

16:57

at face. I can't

16:57

speak right now. What is happening in my

17:00

fucking mouth? I

17:00

did something much worse than this.

17:03

Laces wedding food with pot

17:06

Granes' deputies arrived body cam show.

17:08

And she

17:08

got a shit evened right there. Okay. But

17:10

wait a minute. Hold on. So

17:12

the deputies responded to the February nineteenth

17:15

wedding of Daniel and Andrew Saboboda

17:17

after reports of marijuana based food

17:19

and making guests feel high or

17:21

ill. What

17:22

else did she just dose them all? I didn't tell them, like, made him

17:24

think this is normal food and Yes. And the

17:26

guest tweeted them out because they said they

17:28

felt like, we order didn't feel good to

17:30

the guests actually ratted them

17:31

out. I'm not being

17:34

an asshole here, but it's just a little bit of

17:36

fucking pot they get.

17:36

What a way

17:36

to ruin that that poor person's

17:39

wedding day? She's just trying to give you three drugs.

17:41

Honestly, you know what? That's in this

17:43

economy. What was it late? Was

17:45

it, like, she was trying to fucking

17:47

get people high against her will or was she just like, yeah,

17:49

we have some weed shit

17:49

here. Let's let's party. It's a wedding. Well, I got a

17:52

feeling it

17:52

was late. So New Year's Eve

17:54

a while back, I I just got out of college and

17:57

me and my boys went to this party, and

17:59

we brought this shit called booth

18:00

juice. It was just supposed to

18:01

be for us. You're gonna say ruthless when I was getting nervous.

18:04

Well, booth juice is

18:06

basically orange juice ever clear

18:08

and, like, 6XSC pills put

18:11

into it. And it was just supposed to be for us,

18:13

but they put it out on the table and we didn't stop

18:15

anybody. And that whole party was

18:16

lit. Nice. That party was lit up, boy. That

18:18

was still to this day, probably, the best New Year's

18:20

Eve party. Gotcha. Limitations, bro. Easy. Yeah.

18:23

You're going to jail. Yeah.

18:25

These are all jokes.

18:26

Who's it? Allegedly.

18:27

Yeah. This is the story.

18:28

I by the way, great idea for episode a

18:31

thousand. Hey, guys. Hey, guys.

18:32

Those those channels. So that's you. Yeah. Yeah. You

18:34

you shouldn't take anything I'd say, sir. You shouldn't

18:36

on episode one. Product up on episode one

18:38

thousand that you want, we'll get, like, I have some of the

18:41

a fan gave me GHB

18:43

or one of these crazy fucking high

18:45

end designer

18:45

drugs. We should all just take drugs on the side. H. B. Is

18:48

the date

18:48

rape drug. Is that it? Yeah. He

18:51

says no English. No. It's Sastafres.

18:55

Sassafrast is what they gave me. Whatever like that

18:57

that is. Do you you

18:58

ever done DMT? Yeah.

19:00

I'm very interested in doing DMT.

19:02

It sucks. Really? Yeah.

19:04

Interesting. Did you see the slugs?

19:05

Sucks. Why

19:06

did you

19:07

say so? First of all, I I read this

19:09

actually. Shannon, look this story up. Black people,

19:11

when they do DMT,

19:13

they've been encountering racist entities.

19:16

The elves are racist. The gnomes are racist.

19:18

They're

19:18

called police, Louis. Got it.

19:20

I don't know if you

19:23

look this up. This is what I got.

19:25

The gnome show

19:25

up. Okay. There is it looking

19:28

on right now. Yeah. Did look

19:30

shit. Look this up, Shannon. Is that on play

19:31

around? I'm sorry. Psychedelic Privilege are

19:33

DMT's entities racist. DMT users

19:35

often come across strange beings called machine

19:38

elves. Dispensing advice and adventure. They

19:40

were thought to be a benevolent, but we can no longer ignore

19:42

the fact that you

19:43

see. This is a real article.

19:47

What what what what

19:48

is vice what was that? It's

19:51

affru dot com AFRU

19:54

dot com. Say

19:55

Why why did they make the eyes behind the

19:58

guy fucking Lincoln? Oh,

19:59

I thought that they were playing with the a pothole. Is that is

20:02

that so

20:02

now that so it's answering It's

20:04

either Lincoln I was trying to figure

20:05

out that they were monkey eyes.

20:07

I could be. It

20:08

could be. They don't like monkey eyes, and

20:10

that would be a little bit racist again.

20:13

It's either

20:14

it's either Lincoln or a monkey and it's not good

20:16

either way.

20:16

The missing Lincoln? The

20:19

monkey is that. Shana,

20:22

do you mean if you ever read that article and then come

20:24

back to us and tell us what it is?

20:25

Are you mixed? No. No? What

20:27

are you? I am Italian, Dutch, and German.

20:29

Really? Italian, Dutch, German.

20:32

Wow. It's

20:33

Italian though. Right? Oh,

20:34

yeah. Give me the next

20:36

word to start. Okay. Alright. So

20:38

yeah. Give me the next weirdest crime scene. Okay. I joined just to read

20:40

it, and I'll show you the picture. Yeah. Sure. Okay. So

20:42

it's a UK

20:42

teen car thief. Don't fucking

20:45

tell me, because I can't read. I I understand.

20:47

I I fucked up reading a couple of them. I can read it.

20:49

Give it back to me. Gotta do it again. Fuck

20:51

you. UK cartoon,

20:53

Up. Up.

20:54

Up. Up. Take

20:56

three. I'm so high. I'm really

20:58

legit. I think I don't know how you're here.

21:00

I've got to be honest with

21:01

you. I gotta honest with yeah.

21:03

We had a good time. Yeah. Gotcha.

21:05

UK team,

21:06

Carthy, have caught hiding in giant

21:08

stuff, Teddy Bear. Wow.

21:11

So he was running from the cops and

21:13

then he there's the giant

21:14

lady there. Buddl's blown out.

21:16

So does this mean is this does he identify as

21:19

a furry that how this goes?

21:20

Joshua Dobson.

21:21

That's just crazy. He has to

21:24

be Joshua Dobson

21:26

eighteen was arrested in

21:28

July near Manchester in suspicion of charges of

21:30

motor vehicle

21:30

theft. Yeah. That's all alright. That's

21:33

funny. Cash. You can't go to the next one. This

21:35

bit stinks. Oh, it's not. I just thought

21:36

they're interesting. Yeah. Yeah. You know

21:37

that there's kids that so there's

21:40

kids that identify as furies now and

21:42

we'll just meow in school

21:44

and this is allowed. Like This

21:46

is, like, the they have to, like, like,

21:48

placate to them. Like, that's a Wow. That's

21:50

true. Like, no. That's dead ass

21:52

serious. Well,

21:53

something up. I wouldn't I wouldn't see these furry kids. They'll just be

21:55

like, yeah.

21:55

They'll just be they'll just answer them me out. And

21:57

and it's like you can't make fun of them because this

21:59

is what they

22:01

like, identify The bachelors got a bit

22:02

about it and have one of the the kids into his

22:04

daughter's class as a tiger.

22:06

What? Yes. I understand. Why did they all

22:08

seem to be a cat? If that's

22:09

the case, just take them out of school to put a bit of fuck

22:12

at Zoom. See how quickly they wanna be a human

22:14

again. Not a bad point. Yeah.

22:16

I I will I'm very lucky that my son,

22:18

he just sorta has a level head even though he's,

22:20

like, part of this new

22:20

generation. He's not, like,

22:23

like, did I tell you this the other day? I

22:25

asked him

22:26

I said something about him

22:28

being gay. I don't know. I was like making fun of him or

22:30

something. I don't remember exactly what it was. But

22:32

he just saw almost, like, a head and attitude was, like,

22:34

gay. That'd be weird. And was like,

22:36

really? I was like, you know that it's weird. And I didn't

22:38

say that to him, but I was like, I was like, yes, dude. Get

22:40

to it. Like, he I was weirdly

22:43

proud I'm not saying that being gay is

22:44

weird. No. What I'm saying is

22:46

that dick is. It shouldn't be, like, it's been

22:48

so normalized and so, like,

22:51

overcorrected that it's,

22:53

like, I just feel like in

22:55

my mind, I was like, we're gonna have a whole

22:57

new generation of gays that aren't really even

22:59

gay.

22:59

Yeah. But

23:00

I still think that most kids are

23:02

going like, no. Still kind of funny. What's the trans thing in our

23:04

lay? Like, ten percent of the kids are are identified as

23:06

non binary. No. Trans. Yeah. Yeah. No.

23:08

That's there's

23:09

no way

23:09

that's a real number. I swear to god. And

23:11

that's so that they brought it up in congress. And they were like, well well, one of

23:13

two things is happening. Either trans people are

23:16

being ridiculously suppressed

23:19

in the Midwest because it's less than one percent of one percent

23:22

identified, or it's being promoted in

23:24

LA because

23:24

it's, like, up to ten percent. Of course.

23:25

And they're, like, well, which

23:26

ones happening here? Well,

23:28

it's definitely definitely being promoted. And and

23:30

gay being gay is not weird. I just, like, as

23:32

a joke, as a guy growing up as an

23:35

athlete, like, you know, give me one

23:37

gig at it. It's like, yeah, I suck dick, but I could

23:39

also run A44 And I'd be

23:40

like, alright, my dude. Yeah. Fuck you. Like, I

23:42

mean, they're out there probably. Right? There's gotta

23:44

be some That's better be sad.

23:45

There was some there was some MMA fighters that

23:47

were gay rights. There's no there's

23:48

no one dooley. Yeah. There

23:50

was the one

23:51

there was the one you did gay porn. Yeah.

23:54

Dakota

23:55

thing. It was like

23:55

cock ring. This is like Yeah.

23:57

It was something like that. Dakota Cochrane. Yeah. Yeah.

23:59

Dakota Cochrane, I think it was his name, dude.

24:01

Look at me and Vicky. I feel like we didn't watch

24:03

his tape horn.

24:05

No. You guys we've watched it on skinks. I was

24:07

pissed about it. Last night, I didn't watch it on getting

24:09

pegged on skinks. I don't know why you do this to

24:10

me. I don't know why you do this myself. Are you this

24:12

is a choice that you make, dude? No. It's

24:14

know. You're a go

24:15

to Cochrane, dude. He was who are

24:18

there openly gay I think he

24:19

was gay for the pay. Think he was gay for

24:22

You know? Technically, everyone's gay for pay. Everyone's

24:24

got a price. Every

24:27

everyone, Gerard, what's

24:30

your price? Shockingly low.

24:33

Shockingly

24:33

low. I love a dick in the

24:34

ass. How

24:36

big is

24:37

the dick? Average size.

24:40

What's average size? To

24:42

me? Yeah. Four inches.

24:46

I don't

24:46

know. I don't know. A six inch

24:49

right up your poop. Shoot. It's it's

24:51

hard to say when the

24:52

money is down on the table. You

24:54

know what I'm saying? It's like, if if that's real money, dollars cash,

24:58

tax free. Somebody puts

25:00

ten thousand dollars right in front me

25:02

or, like, So how long are we talking

25:03

here? What's the duration? Gerard's

25:06

gotta

25:06

fucking step it up a little bit in

25:09

life. Ten thousand. That's it.

25:11

Hey. If it's on

25:11

the table, on the table

25:12

Unfortunately, that's also and I have to know it. Also, yeah. That

25:15

there's a lot of the Anywhere. So there

25:17

at ten thousand is way

25:19

too low. Guys. For

25:21

for cocking the ass. It is

25:23

substantially too

25:23

low. I got bills to pay. Yeah.

25:27

I don't say, guys. Yeah. Well, I was just saying, you tried

25:29

different. What does anyone know? I was just I was

25:31

just asking you two minutes of the stipulation. Oh,

25:33

shit. Sorry. You go, wow. Wow.

25:35

We get real ass.

25:38

Thank you. It's time to get

25:40

real

25:40

ass. But here's your

25:43

hair now. Nice. Solid. Have you

25:45

ever realized? This is the Like

25:46

by producers who built the way yet Wait.

25:49

What? Mark the Akisi. I

25:51

didn't know that. He just fought Michael

25:52

Johnson, like, two weeks ago. Is

25:55

that facts? He played with Michael

25:56

Johnson as well two nights ago.

26:00

Starts taking your back. No. No. No.

26:02

No. I don't

26:02

know.

26:02

It was nice. Yeah. This is

26:04

the only other male gig USC

26:06

fighter I could find. Wow.

26:08

What what's

26:08

the publication here? Law

26:10

of the fist dot com. Is that is

26:12

that a

26:12

reputable place? I hope that's a really

26:15

nice thing. Alright.

26:20

Let's see. Shannon, let's go

26:23

to Twitter night.

26:25

Fuck. Now to get your

26:27

ass kicked by a couple of dozen people.

26:30

My motherfuckers is sachets. Oh,

26:33

no.

26:35

Alright. So there's a thirty four year old woman who

26:38

lost her eye and she reveals how

26:40

strangers treat her. We're gonna

26:42

figure out if this one is toy or

26:44

nigh Let's say,

26:46

oh my

26:47

Christ. So

26:49

when she was thirty, she was diagnosed with

26:51

a tumor, but it was between her eye

26:53

and her brain. And so the only way they could remove

26:55

it was What the fuck is the picture on the

26:57

right? I think she's being silly.

26:59

Why should we It looks like her eyeballs

27:01

coming out of

27:02

her ride. That's what is I don't even understand what's

27:04

going on. Is that is this Halloween or is this It

27:06

it doesn't

27:07

I think

27:08

I just covered it up, so I can't tell that's a forever

27:10

thing. No.

27:11

This is they so they decided to instead of

27:13

replace it with a glass eye or something, they just

27:15

used skin.

27:16

Why? I

27:17

mean, it's pretty toy.

27:18

All things

27:19

considered pretty toy. Yeah. She's like

27:22

a hot Batman villain. Yeah,

27:24

dude. I'm not

27:24

into it at all. nobody would not

27:27

Nobody nobody's choosy in, Mickey. I'm

27:29

I'm alright. Nobody's saying we we

27:31

want that to be our girlfriend's

27:32

eye. I need to We

27:34

Okay. I gotta see it a little out half. Too shallow to make

27:36

a real That's actually a good point too. Let's just see it

27:38

a little out half.

27:40

I don't think I'm in. If

27:41

even with two papers, you're not. Two papers, I'm not

27:44

in Christ. What's wrong with you, Mike?

27:45

Very high stakes. I gotta tell you, I think the

27:47

mole kinda throws me off more than the eye.

27:49

I don't wanna say it, but Yeah. A little bit.

27:52

Right?

27:52

Alright. So

27:52

I'd go one eye rather than one

27:54

more. Dogg, she's the pretty gout. She got one

27:56

pretty eye. The beautiful eye right

27:59

there. She, by the way, it takes her the time to do her eye makeup, which

28:01

is nice. Right. Take her. Take

28:03

her my ass. Eleven thousand for a night with her. No.

28:05

Stop it. I would smash in

28:08

a hard

28:08

feet. Are you kidding me this gal? And honestly, she would fucking

28:10

treat you like a king. She would go crazy,

28:12

but she has to do her

28:15

eyeshadow

28:15

blind. Because she has

28:17

to close her one good eye that is to

28:19

link up on. So it probably takes her just

28:21

as long. If not longer,

28:23

than a girl with two what? You know what? Fuck this. But the fuck is

28:25

wrong with you that that's what you thought about with you. Because

28:27

he said she does her makeup fast because half

28:30

the

28:30

time, I'm saying longer because

28:31

you gotta deal blind. Can I say very

28:34

it sucks very pretty eyes. Pretty tight

28:36

for a fucking chick You don't

28:38

know why that No. Fuck. We have we have always seen it for one

28:40

to walk up there. So one to eight Will she talk

28:42

like a pirate in

28:43

bed? Yes. And

28:46

her depth reception's gonna be off. So she's

28:48

like she's like jacking it. She's gonna be

28:49

like she's slamming the balls. No. Stop

28:52

saying the hard r.

28:55

The guy who's just putting

28:57

goddamn tight, all things considered. I I don't

28:59

have an issue with this, bitch. And can we

29:01

see your body

29:01

share? We got

29:02

a body shot to find her Instagram

29:04

is private. I wasn't able to find any school buy

29:07

pictures.

29:07

Racist protesters are harassing her.

29:09

This is

29:10

the closest vegan sito, but the rest of her

29:12

I mean, like, she's playful. She put that

29:14

that shows personality. Got a good

29:16

personality. Yeah.

29:18

I'd I'd rob a bag with

29:21

her. Yeah.

29:22

And she's

29:22

gonna be running into the door and

29:25

shit. I

29:25

was just I

29:26

just feel, like, you know, that Where is it just

29:29

to have her for Halloween?

29:30

She's from

29:31

Australia? Yes.

29:32

Oh, cool accent.

29:33

My bossy Broads goes up a point.

29:36

Yep.

29:36

She said, good eye. You might that's

29:38

not a good eye. My

29:41

good eye.

29:42

No. That's really bad, actually.

29:45

Alright. These are

29:45

good

29:45

jokes, guys. I'm trying to I like

29:47

that one. I like that one. I like the the folks.

29:50

I'm a punny guy. Everyone knows

29:52

that. Let's see. Let's see.

29:54

Ugandan man, twelve

29:56

wives, one hundred and two children

29:58

and over two hundred grandchildren. That's sick.

30:00

Finally, besides stop having kids

30:02

due to the rise rising

30:04

cost of living.

30:06

So he

30:06

actually has five hundred and sixty eight

30:08

grandchildren. I thought he had two

30:09

hundred and somewhat grandchildren, Shannon. Oh, man.

30:11

This guy's my fucking hair.

30:12

I'm putting with my coffee. I This

30:14

guy's my hair. To give

30:16

you a coffee a while ago. You want that many children?

30:18

I think

30:18

I yeah. I'd I'd I aspire to

30:20

have multiple ones. Five Exactly. Well, that's the

30:22

thing. My whole believe a

30:25

documentary that just came out where it's like,

30:27

you know, they're they're really focusing so

30:29

much on him wanting to have a sex

30:30

cult. And I'm like, okay. That's not that

30:33

bad. That's kinda cool, actually. I understand that.

30:35

Nice

30:35

bit. Because I'm talking about up his loop.

30:37

Yeah.

30:37

That many nerds came out. He

30:39

wants

30:39

to have a sex. I

30:40

don't want to have a sex call. The problem was -- What's the latest? -- teenage sex

30:43

call. That was that's usually

30:44

an adult sex

30:45

call. You're not talking about

30:46

our I thought you're talking about our Kelly here. You're

30:48

really talking about

30:49

think there's a lot of guys out there that

30:51

Who doesn't want a fucking hair? That's true. I

30:53

mean, who what's the what are what are we trying to

30:55

get

30:55

all Richard Vazante here when we're picked from the

30:58

bathroom? It's a bunch of old bitch. You're fucking with me. Right? That's

31:00

right.

31:00

Yeah. That's right. No. I'm not. I swear

31:02

to God. That was,

31:03

like, not put a number on things, but

31:05

not paying for the whole thing. I don't think I know the whole thing.

31:07

The whole thing. You don't know the whole thing about

31:10

Chris Delia? No. I'll just send you a

31:12

link. We've talked about it so much in this way. And I

31:14

don't know if even

31:14

sure. Like, people can make a documentary and say anything.

31:17

Like, so I felt bad, you know,

31:19

continuously That's

31:19

one of those things that's like -- Trevor's gonna

31:22

use Skype. -- if you're poor.

31:23

No. Who gank. Because at this point, you know, for, you know, for pennies on the

31:26

dollar. You know, ahead of your mind. Trash if

31:28

you

31:28

keep working that value risk. You know,

31:30

day in a teenager. Classy if Classy if

31:32

you're rich, Trashy if you're poor.

31:34

Class, if you're rich I think it's I think the the

31:36

rich people are Is it now McJagger, like, fucking

31:38

with a nineteen year old or something that guy's ninety? Look,

31:40

I got no problem with When I'm ninety years old,

31:42

if I get a nineteen year old girl, thank you very

31:45

much, Caitlin.

31:45

Mike, this I don't know why this coffee is a

31:47

weird color

31:48

though. Cream. A

31:51

blind guy made it. Yeah. Looks

31:53

not good. Alright. So

31:55

let's see. What is this Ugandan guy?

31:58

Let me see him. So

32:00

this is with some of his kids. All of his

32:02

wives, he has them all live in the same

32:04

house, so that he can make sure that they're not

32:06

full wandering with other men.

32:08

Mhmm.

32:08

And, yeah, most of his kids also

32:11

live on his farm. How many

32:13

I'm

32:13

sorry. What are the numbers again? How many kids?

32:15

How many grand twelve wives, a hundred and two kids, and

32:17

five hundred and sixty eight grand kids. Gosh, do

32:19

I love them. What's his name? He should

32:22

be on money or something. On

32:24

money. It's

32:27

Changing my

32:29

name to that. Out of respect.

32:33

Polygomy is legal. His wives are

32:35

considering taking birth control to pull this

32:37

up the family from growing. That's a lot. It's a

32:39

lot of kids. It's too much. It's There was

32:41

a time in my life where I was like, I could have two

32:43

girlfriends. Like, a two live in girlfriends that,

32:46

you know, fucking, they cook, they

32:48

clean, they fucking take care of yourself.

32:50

Like that is just ultimately the

32:52

fantasy. But I will say that

32:54

girls that are willing to do that. Because I've

32:56

had a couple checks who sort of,

32:58

like, had that, like, vibe. They're always a

33:00

little bit fucking

33:00

wacky. That's what I'm

33:01

saying. Out of three months, if you know you're getting

33:03

a couple whack Oh, yeah. There were couple snakes in

33:05

the grass there. Well, even

33:07

there though, in Africa, I

33:09

wonder

33:09

how, like, how

33:10

weird that is. Like, in his village,

33:13

do a lot of guys take on multiple wives.

33:16

Like, in your

33:16

God, I have no idea. I can tell you one thing

33:18

based on watching nine today fiance. Please.

33:20

That there is a guy that lives in Africa.

33:23

I'm just not sure of exactly where, but

33:25

he's dating a girl from the

33:27

United States of an older woman, of

33:29

course, and he made an agreement with her. You probably know the

33:32

there was one Yes. Exactly.

33:34

And so, like, he made her agree that

33:36

he can still have additional wives

33:38

but he convinces her the reason why he has

33:40

to do it is because she's too old to have kids

33:42

so that he can have kids with

33:43

them. But it is, yeah, expected around ten

33:46

multiple

33:46

times. Exploit her innermost fucking insecurity.

33:49

Solid. Exactly. Yeah. It's all

33:50

that you got on the plane with a PSA. Right. There was

33:52

a

33:52

vaccine. You're so you're so

33:55

old. you when nobody else will

33:57

on the condition of, I get

33:59

to fuck whoever I

34:00

want. Shannon, are you aware that you're clear to

34:02

do that? now where men are gonna have to

34:04

take on younger wives because your eggs have

34:06

dried

34:06

up. No, I think I'm

34:07

just I'm just good, I

34:09

think. how would that conversation go with you

34:11

if somebody was like, hey, I like

34:14

you, but I like you better as a a

34:16

throttle? No.

34:17

hard -- No. -- hike now. -- never could never

34:20

do it in a million years. Nope. I don't wanna because

34:22

I like, when I am involved, like, there's, like,

34:24

a jealous like, I've just I'd rather not

34:26

deal with the headache

34:27

all, then have to deal with that. Yeah. But if you

34:29

have a headache, he she could tag her in,

34:31

and you look at the fucking nap, and then she's

34:33

fucking what if your

34:34

wife came up to you one day and was like,

34:37

I love you. That I wanna be in a throttle. With another

34:39

man, another

34:39

man, I would poke her

34:41

eye out. That's what happened with that girl. That's what happened

34:43

with that

34:43

girl. Yeah. They had

34:44

to make up a cancer backstory. Yeah. She

34:46

fucking You know, I wanna have, like, kill Bill -- Mhmm. --

34:48

fuck that bitch. Get out of the horn nasty

34:51

bitch. But but Shannon's also, well, not

34:53

even I every time we talk about it, it gets me

34:55

angry, so I wouldn't say that, Shannon. This

34:57

is what a selfish woman you are. Natalie,

34:59

could you be in a threpple, Natalie, in

35:01

a serious threpple, not just a sexual thing.

35:04

Not not a threesome. But I'm talking about,

35:06

like, serious relationship. Because Natalie's from

35:08

this generation of non binary

35:10

fucking Polyumi

35:12

fucking who

35:13

You say, no. You're racist, heishe,

35:15

bbbs, weebulos. Right? Natalie? Yeah.

35:18

Yeah. So could you could you get

35:20

into

35:21

something like that? I

35:22

think it would be difficult for me, but I also it's never been

35:25

presented, so I I wouldn't rule it out.

35:27

So but my

35:29

good minded shit so

35:31

open minded. Yeah. Yeah. This is why this

35:33

generation is so

35:34

fucking open

35:34

to manipulation. You are a manipulative

35:37

fucking asshole. This generation is

35:40

just right for

35:40

you, man. Yeah. That's why I

35:41

like them. I'm looking me on. You have to

35:43

really take

35:43

advantage. So you'd be open to that,

35:46

Nelly. I it would have stars

35:48

would have to align perfectly, I think. Well, with

35:50

a guy though,

35:50

with

35:51

a guy and a gal. That's that's

35:52

the best for me because then I get one of

35:55

each. Why would you and your girlfriend be

35:57

my Trouble checks. My girlfriend's not

35:59

into men. Whatever.

36:00

She needs to chill. She

36:02

needs to fucking start being cool

36:05

for once. Sick of

36:07

it. She'll

36:07

lesbian. Yeah. She'll be a

36:10

lesbian. We gathered,

36:11

like, to exclusion

36:12

that out. I'm

36:13

not. But my girlfriend is. Okay.

36:15

You're not a lesbian, but

36:17

No. I'm

36:17

I'm I'm bi. I'm in the middle of it. That's

36:19

even sick. Prove it.

36:20

Come over here. It sucks, Mickey. --

36:21

sounds awesome. Come on. For ten thousand

36:24

dollars. Come

36:24

on, dude.

36:25

No. What's wrong

36:25

with you? She's a fucking real human being, man.

36:27

It is Natalie.

36:28

Body is not on the table. Natalie,

36:31

I'm sorry. Gals, Give me give

36:33

me a little dance.

36:36

Empty. Give me a little dance.

36:40

Keep it sexy producers. You guys got you guys

36:41

got Omry. Yuck. Who

36:44

did that? Fucking puke is disgusting.

36:46

Who made that assignment? Yeah. I don't know

36:48

if I can have that many wives. I but there was there

36:51

was a time in my life where I was like, that was

36:53

it, dude. I was like, I wanna two

36:55

fucking checks to be, like, my live in girlfriend.

36:57

But think about it. That's fucking that's

37:00

twice as many PTA meetings. That's twice as

37:02

many eight AM soccer

37:03

games. I mean, fucking No.

37:04

No. Not twice the kids. You think

37:05

that guy that guy's got a hundred

37:07

and six kids. Yeah. Of course. That's like I'm a

37:09

take a lot of fucking

37:12

That's There's a lot of Kishan. Not about the kids. It's really about that. also

37:14

need the Kishan for PTA meetings.

37:16

No. He's fuck. He's blessed.

37:20

These kids are lucky he's still there. It's crazy. He's making up for all

37:22

other black men that we are by being there for

37:25

a hundred and six years. He's doing a

37:27

lot of heavy lifting. Yeah. Yeah.

37:30

Alright. Let's take a quick moment and thank yolked him dot com

37:32

for supporting today's show. Yolked him dot com is home

37:34

of the sixty dollar kilo. If you guys are in the market

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38:00

Alright. Where were we?

38:02

What is this sports reporter? He went viral

38:04

for being cranky during

38:06

Blizzard coverage. I guess it's a sports reporter they put up

38:08

on the the weather.

38:10

And oh, yeah. Saw this show. I

38:12

didn't see it. Yeah. He was out in the

38:14

cold. Yeah.

38:14

Let's see. This guy's competing with the African guy for

38:17

real estate of the week right now.

38:18

Again, the same way

38:21

I felt about eight minutes ago when

38:23

you asked me that same question. I I

38:26

normally do sports. Everything is

38:28

canceled here for the next couple of

38:30

days. So what better time to ask the sports guy to come

38:32

in about five hours normally earlier

38:34

than he would normally wake up, go

38:37

stand out in wind and the snow and the cold and

38:39

tell other people not to do the same. I didn't

38:41

even realize that there was a three

38:44

thirty also in

38:46

the

38:46

morning. Until today. It's absolutely fantastic. Right?

38:48

You know, I I like to see these evening

38:50

shows that are only thirty minutes

38:53

long and generally on

38:55

those shows I'm inside. So this is a

38:58

really long show tune in for the next

39:00

couple hours to watch me

39:02

progressively get

39:04

crankier and crankier.

39:06

How do I get that story here? Seven

39:08

duty. I I feel like Clint got the

39:11

better end of that deal. You

39:13

know, that thing's heated the outdoors currently

39:15

is not heated. Well, I'll tell you what, Ryan.

39:17

I've I've got good news and and I've

39:19

got bad news.

39:22

Good news. Is that I can still face

39:24

now. The bad news is I kind of

39:26

wish I couldn't. Can I

39:28

go back to my

39:30

regular job. I'm pretty sure Ryan

39:32

that you guys

39:32

asked. Mark Wilde, they realized, dude. Yeah.

39:35

That was very Why do

39:37

the news? Why does the news have those guys do that? It's

39:40

kinda crazy that that's still a thing that's

39:42

good news. The joke, you're just standing

39:44

outside,

39:45

like the news. Like, the way that we sort of can like,

39:47

they think you're, like,

39:48

alright. We're gonna have, like, a a TV set now

39:50

with, like, thirty people behind the cameras and

39:52

a person in the suit. And it's

39:55

like nobody really consumes the news that way. Nobody. Like, most people are just getting

39:57

it on the Internet. Like, I wonder what the the numbers are

39:59

on, like, this I think it's gotta

40:01

be for old people.

40:03

But it's got like,

40:03

the arthur shoved somebody

40:04

right into the eye of a fucking hurricane with

40:07

a with an umbrella and they're like, yeah, it's

40:09

raining out. It's a hurricane, but just even like

40:11

the the traditional format of, like, Alright. And

40:13

now we're gonna go over to the weather guy, then they pan over to a guy, and he's in

40:15

front of a green screen doing this, and it's so

40:17

like from the sixties. Like, it just doesn't

40:19

really make sense that

40:21

silly thing that we're even, you know, doing.

40:24

It'll probably

40:24

be phased out by the time you're old.

40:26

Probably. I know my my aunt

40:30

was watching watched days of our lives, her entire life. I've watched days of her lives

40:32

my entire life. Since I was a fucking

40:34

child. Okay? I remember

40:36

one of my first

40:38

crushes. Yeah. When my first crush is ever was billy on days of

40:40

our

40:40

life. It's that's a huge cute No.

40:42

No.

40:42

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

40:44

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. You guys

40:48

are just Luis Love. She's a billie. Louis Love. Do

40:50

Krista Allen. She was also you

40:52

guys will know her because she was the hot

40:54

girl in the elevator and a

40:56

liar liar.

40:57

Okay. Oh, yeah.

40:58

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Alright. I know

41:00

you're talking about it. Well, Chris to Allan. She did

41:02

play ball. Why not, Chad, shouldn't it?

41:05

That's not Chris to Erez. Don't

41:07

do it. That's that's Kirsty Allen. She's gotten

41:09

so much surgery at this point. Go back to

41:11

her. Did

41:12

she just die? No. That's Kirsty Allen. Oh,

41:14

excuse me. I thought it Chris. Oh, hey. That Kirsty

41:16

out. Who the fuck is that? Oh,

41:19

that's not Chris. She's good, though.

41:22

No. That's Krista b l. And that's other some

41:24

other bitch. She's hot though. She is cute, but that's

41:26

not her. KRISTA

41:30

Shannon.

41:31

One of my first crushes.

41:34

Man. Oh, shoot the fucking

41:35

cameras? Yeah, dude. She was

41:36

fucking That's a bit.

41:38

She's old as

41:39

fuck. Now. That's a good

41:39

cheek to dimple

41:40

ratio right there. Pull up young, Krista Allen

41:42

Shannon. She's also in

41:43

anger management. She was in anger

41:45

management. You're right. Well, well, she's one of the lesbians.

41:49

Sex addicts, lesbians? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

41:51

Yeah. Yeah. I remember now. Yeah. She

41:54

was she was so fucking bad ass dude. And I

41:56

remember as a kid, just being old. You know, I

41:58

fucking loved

41:59

her. She

41:59

kinda reminds me of Yasmin Bleath. Remember her

42:01

Yasmin Bleath by evening? Oh, it has

42:03

me it doesn't mean. Yeah. She was

42:05

a fucking goddamn smoke show. But I would

42:07

watch this. And they they just they just took

42:09

days of our lives off of television. My aunt,

42:11

whose eighty five results has been watching this. I

42:13

mean, for forty, fifty years at least, however long

42:15

it's been on, my been watching because of our lives. And

42:17

they just took it off television, and they put it on the peacock gap. And then

42:20

for three months, she didn't she never mentioned

42:22

anything. I mean, she's just been silently being

42:24

tortured because she doesn't

42:26

have a work the peacock app on

42:28

the TV. So I eventually had, like, teacher, and it's so it's so

42:30

intuitive. Like, you go,

42:32

no. You press the fuck.

42:34

Obviously the middle button and you fucking just scroll. What is what? Like,

42:36

but the old people, they just don't really

42:38

understand. It's very interesting to sort of

42:40

watch them try to back in my day.

42:44

You just heard all the television. What the things of my lives came up?

42:46

It's genuinely easier than figuring

42:48

out like a remote control from even ten

42:50

years

42:51

ago. Like, these new, like

42:53

Yeah. Going through channels, it's just a little big change,

42:54

man. Yeah. Going through channels is

42:55

kinda tough. You gotta find the guide and, like, there's,

42:58

like, a lot

43:00

TV's got six

43:01

I don't even know how to text. Click the button in the middle, and I just say

43:03

the word. I'm like peacock channel, and it

43:05

doesn't get born. Find me a

43:07

guy who wanna pay that

43:09

down. Ten thousand dollars need need money

43:11

ASAP. Please. Genius forebought.

43:14

That's what they do

43:17

at Ants By the way, if anybody ever needs a cash advance, that's

43:19

what they like. You can either pay thirty six

43:21

to thirty seven percent on

43:22

Yeah. Look up what's the the a fast way to

43:24

make cash. I used to do this I

43:27

was younger. I would look up like, what's I was so broke. I was like, which is

43:29

a fast way to make cash? And I could never find anything. There's just

43:31

not there's not like what's

43:34

what's the fact Have you ever tried to be her own? You know, it's for newer, buddy. You had to

43:36

make one thousand dollars in cold hard

43:38

cash tomorrow.

43:39

Like, how do you guys donating

43:42

sperm

43:43

go for? Alright. Legally or illegal? I think it more

43:45

for plasma. Plasma? I think that's the thing you

43:47

have to do. Like, for

43:50

like, have a thousand dollars, obviously. But, like, let's just say I have no money. And I

43:52

I didn't have a pot, like, what would I

43:54

do to make a thousand dollars by

43:56

tomorrow? By selling

43:58

shit, or, like I guess, Robin

44:00

Banks are on top of all the cameras and

44:02

stuff nowadays. Yeah.

44:03

Is there even cash at banks anymore? Like, how much

44:06

money do you actually get away with? I think we're there has

44:08

to be cash at banks. I'm just gonna give you

44:10

gold bars. I mean, I have no

44:11

idea. Hey. Give

44:12

me a gold bars. That's what's behind the fucking

44:14

thing. What's behind the count of how? It's

44:16

like seventeen dollars. He uses cash

44:19

there's gotta be some cash in there

44:21

somewhere. Right? Yeah. I I you're probably

44:23

better off if you had to rob something,

44:25

you'd probably better off you know, getting an ATM bushy out

44:27

of, like, a Bodega. So What would I what would I

44:29

rob if I had Oh, no. Let's come up with

44:31

a scheme right

44:31

now, though. I mean, if I if

44:34

I

44:34

had to come up with cash You have a car?

44:36

I do have a car. You have a car? Then

44:37

Rob a construction site. I mean,

44:40

Rob a car

44:40

Well, I

44:40

get all the copper. Get all the copper.

44:42

Guys, can we just not a lot of people. What do you You

44:45

just said what's the best place

44:45

to rob? Well, you're not gonna rob

44:47

a place necessarily. You could just come up with something

44:49

for, like, a thousand

44:51

dollars. Or do it do something fucking Was

44:52

it did that lady get caught panhandleage, but

44:55

she worked at, like, JC1

44:56

women, like, you guys could literally suck

45:00

two dicks pretty easily. Gals. A thousand

45:02

dollars just where you just understand where you

45:04

have it. A thousand dollars Shannon

45:07

with her status at Gas Digital. Yeah. She can easily throw something

45:09

out there by carrying me a little bit of cashola

45:12

boys on Instagram. Some

45:14

guys being

45:16

her DM. Like, I'll suck the cock dry for five hundred dollars. Five hundred dollars.

45:18

Actually, Shannon, if you just the first guy tried to go for

45:20

two thousand, but I'll suck the cock directly off

45:22

your body. For two thousand

45:24

dollars, you'll probably get to take her even for

45:26

one guy and get double what you

45:27

needed, and then give me the thousand. And that's how I

45:29

would make my money. Pipp. It'd be a it'd

45:31

be a Pipp. the

45:32

deck. We both get our thousand.

45:35

Arbitrage. You'd you'd arbitrage head. I like

45:37

it. Yeah. I'd arbitrage

45:38

it. I don't

45:39

know what that

45:40

means. Either way. I've never said

45:42

that word in

45:43

my mouth. Shannon

45:44

two thousand dollars, would that be enough

45:46

or

45:47

no? No.

45:47

I mean, not unless, like, my parents

45:49

were gonna be murdered if I didn't

45:52

have two dogs.

45:52

Yeah. Okay. If I have your parents gun to both their

45:54

heads, you have to let me eat your ass.

45:57

I

45:57

mean, if the other option was is it one of them

46:00

or both of them was gonna be

46:02

killed?

46:02

Both. Both. They're both that

46:05

just so you know each other.

46:06

And The logistics of that alone. Dude, you're you're

46:08

having a gun to You're a good head

46:10

while your face is a champion. You're a good

46:13

man. You're a good person.

46:16

Shares in front of you. And then she would be bent over. So you

46:18

would have gun here, gun here, they'd be

46:20

sitting. No.

46:21

No. No. It's a no. You guys

46:23

got he's got bombs. Strap

46:25

to him, and he's got one of those dummy wires. So as soon

46:27

as he he lets

46:28

go, they're gone. You know, so he

46:29

gotta hold

46:30

on. Which means, Shannon, you have to spread

46:32

your own ass cheeks too, by the way, the

46:35

logistics of working out -- Well --

46:36

at that point. You just do

46:37

it. Just let them go. Yeah. I

46:39

guess so. There was a time,

46:40

like It looked

46:41

it was about a year, a year, a year and

46:43

a half ago a pandemic was really getting the Shannon,

46:45

and I almost convinced her just to go to Jamaica on

46:47

a romantic vacation. She was, like, she

46:49

was, like, negotiating a sex she would

46:51

have to have with me. She was, like,

46:53

like, once per day with a converse No.

46:55

I think where it got close was

46:57

going to Miami. For my boop. For you get to pay for my

46:59

boobs to be

47:00

redone, but you were gonna go with me. I had to go

47:02

with you and share hotel room, and we're gonna get

47:05

crazy. Yeah. Post op or

47:07

pre op. She got hired down the line.

47:09

She's my employee, Mickey. I think

47:11

it's illegal. You've implicated

47:14

yourself

47:15

both fella's a little Did hold the

47:17

gun to my head today and order me to take my clothes off. I

47:19

did. Give me that. Give me

47:20

that. I put right there right to take your fucking clothes off.

47:23

And then Natalie giggled. And I was like, wow, Natalie, you really

47:25

have changed. You know, it's actually

47:28

harassment. I'm watching Natalie laugh at

47:29

it. I was like, Well, I suddenly

47:31

don't feel

47:31

safe with the gun in Lewisville today. He's really well, you know, that

47:33

sucker run. There's there's a

47:34

there's a There is a

47:35

there's a Russian relaxer going, alright,

47:38

let's talk.

47:40

And here's the thing. This is, like, how powerful, like,

47:42

a real gun is. Like, just this

47:44

right here. Uh-huh. Like, like, I've

47:47

You're gonna have your one eye, brother. You're gonna

47:49

have the sugar. You know the figure of

47:51

the sugar. Dude, it really does.

47:54

It's so dude, you pull that sugar.

47:56

I will fucking. So nerve

47:57

wracking. He's really really gonna go

47:58

up if you pull that trigger. Pull

48:01

that trigger. We're gonna rearrange

48:03

the fucking furniture there.

48:13

If you're a man of honor. No.

48:16

No. No.

48:18

No. Why doesn't it work? I

48:20

mean, Rhino, trying to go out as a drug. My favorite thing in

48:22

the world to do is fucking take a rubber band

48:25

and just point it at somebody's point. That's

48:27

the biggest bully move.

48:29

Yeah.

48:29

Lewis Lewis wants to

48:30

try me. I can see him looking me at the eyes. He

48:32

wants to

48:33

I would I would If mine he was a fuck,

48:35

I would spark his records. I wanna see Well,

48:37

no. It's a big fucking deal.

48:38

You gotta know. I think

48:40

III think that I'd fucking

48:42

I think I'd hold my own for a little bit

48:44

till you got your hands on me. That's we

48:47

have some problems. Wouldn't not take long. Yeah. You're struggling. Right? He had to risk control me. I said, like,

48:49

this is a problem. He's got a vice vice

48:51

rep to

48:51

knowing. Yeah.

48:54

Yeah. Well, I can I can I can do I back up better? Gerard

48:56

wants to Gerard wants to

48:58

spar with me? Yeah. And I'm

49:02

he he picked the the time and said it's

49:05

gonna be, like, five, thirty second rounds.

49:07

Yes. Yeah. Right? Have you all spoken before?

49:08

Taking the terrain. We've

49:11

we've rolled a little

49:12

bit. You know, it wasn't the ice water maker. Oh. It's

49:14

he literally just picked his shots. It was

49:16

fucking it was it it

49:19

was

49:19

uncomfortable. I know what I'm getting into. It

49:22

it was not good. And I don't

49:23

see. I don't wanna hit him in the hay. He's got a lot of good ideas in

49:26

this now. You're gonna It's our cracker, strike us

49:28

on falling out. It's so funny because you're not even

49:30

known as being a striker, but it was so

49:32

like it was so like really

49:34

dump difficult to deal

49:35

with. Did you ever see Lisle El Zeto against against Mohammed

49:38

Ali? No. That's fucking great. It's

49:40

from LA. Is good. It's great. And

49:42

Lyle Alzado takes it one hundred percent

49:44

serious, and Ali's, like, trying to be nice to him and, like,

49:46

dance around. Yeah. And Alzado's a big bad

49:48

motherfucker, and he's taking it for real, and you can see

49:50

the moment where he actually

49:52

cracks Alida. He's like, alright

49:54

then. Black, Black, Black, Black, Black, Black, Black,

49:56

Black. Yeah.

49:56

Yeah. I never really

49:57

I never I never cracked Mickey.

49:58

It was really just him doing a

50:01

lock, why why why why why why why why why why we got

50:03

it? If we if we when we do this

50:05

so we're he he picked the time

50:07

limit, but I'm picking the terrain. I'm

50:09

gonna use it doesn't be, like, a basketball quarterback or a

50:11

field. Oh, I'm

50:12

just gonna move around pepper and okra. Don't

50:14

we gotta keep our feet in the tire. He's

50:16

like, he's a world of a pit bull form.

50:19

I release all those.

50:22

He constantly has, like,

50:23

bacon on

50:26

him idle penetrated. He is full of grease. Yeah.

50:28

But all Yeah. No. II0

50:31

film. It'll be on second deck. I'm excited about

50:33

that. That'll be great. So

50:36

alright. Let's Now how about this?

50:38

Zach and Nikki versus me and

50:40

you, the two of us versus them? Do you

50:42

think we

50:43

got a shot? Yes. I think so too. Yeah. Yeah.

50:45

I think I

50:46

think

50:46

we'd have we'd be a problem. Yeah. So here's

50:48

the thing, Zach. I'd fucking just kick out

50:50

as fat knee. He'd be on the ground.

50:54

I don't fucking need to fall down. It looks like it I got 1II

50:56

got

50:56

a basic You're looking at looking at a holding all of

50:58

that going,

50:59

I'm gonna stab you. Yeah. You're looking at a bad

51:01

That was how many Amico chatted

51:03

my ankle wrestling high school.

51:04

I got a bad wheel. I'd wow. I'd kick him

51:06

where it sucks. And then

51:07

the classic my I broke I broke my

51:10

leg and my coach. The words that

51:12

haunt me, see if

51:12

he can stand on it. Oh. You know what

51:15

happened? Could you stand on it? I know

51:17

I broke it again. Hey. So it turns

51:19

out, you

51:19

know, you were too.

51:20

Now we get Zach's I already have

51:22

a plan what you guys would

51:23

lose, but you go ahead. I'll

51:26

tell you how. So it would we have

51:27

to be extremely committed --

51:30

Yeah. -- to getting him to the ground. And

51:32

that's the

51:33

Him to the ground. Yes. Oh my god. No.

51:35

No. You're not tapping out. Never really ever gets you

51:37

with me. I know I never have. Here's

51:39

what I'm saying. It's two guys.

51:41

It's not one guy you

51:43

have isolating Here's the thing. I think

51:46

we can I can isolate one of his

51:48

limbs. You isolate another two of his

51:50

limbs. He's got one limb

51:51

left. That's all at that limb.

51:53

I'm putting one of you to sleep, and I'm gonna as the

51:55

other one to sleep in. I'm, you know,

51:57

I'm grabbing the other

51:58

one. And I'll I'm gonna use Zach for I'm

52:00

gonna use Zach for cover. Right? No. Like, you

52:02

guys answer me if I'm a human shield. You're gonna yeah.

52:04

I'm

52:04

gonna I'm gonna be jumping off that.

52:05

No. That's fine for

52:08

so long.

52:10

To run behind them, and as they come around them,

52:13

I'm gonna hit the other. Yeah. It's better alright.

52:15

So you think a better approach for me and

52:17

Gerard would be to try to strike with

52:19

you instead of trying to hold you down

52:21

and throw the elbow

52:21

shield. Elbows to the head. I think you guys should just ask for

52:23

truth. That'd be the best trying to

52:26

appeal to

52:28

my Now I actually wanna do

52:29

it. No. Two on one. Two on one. Yeah. What would

52:31

be the the approach though? We have to we have to

52:33

come up with a

52:36

very specific think that dude let's

52:37

wait. Let's see what happens. I gotta hope that you mister

52:40

rattling jaws. Yeah. I gotta I

52:41

gotta hope that you can throw a decent punch. I

52:43

gotta I gotta but

52:45

not like that. Not yet. Not like that. That's

52:47

the thing, like, I'd have

52:48

to wrap them. I know I know

52:50

for a fact that if it's

52:53

just me throwing it. It's gonna be a problem. If you

52:55

wrap a so both of the arms up and I

52:57

start getting, like, unanswered

53:00

shots, the way That might be a good way to do it. We gotta do it. But I think is I

53:02

think you're gonna have a hard time wrapping it to

53:04

wrap it. You got

53:05

it. I know you're strong. You got it. I figured out

53:07

three four shows. He's he's

53:08

got a he's got a fuck

53:10

and break something. I don't know if I'm gonna be able to see. Zach's gonna be the You're

53:12

gonna be the difference maker. Because I'm

53:14

a do Zach's covered

53:17

in Warpage.

53:18

That's gonna get back and then hop on one

53:21

bike and grab. Gotta

53:21

fucking cars and a

53:24

moon beer. You

53:26

thought you thought he was knocked out on the ground. It turns out he

53:28

crawls up bites your healy's tenant rips.

53:30

He's in blackface. He's in blackface.

53:33

Gonna

53:33

find some stash cocaine and just start going

53:35

nuts. I think that's my boy. So

53:37

you think you let me ask you a question.

53:39

Do you think that and we can't do it right

53:41

now. Shot. Do you think that he could bear hug

53:43

your arms closed long enough for somebody to start rattling

53:45

shots off. Or do you think you'd be able

53:47

to use technique to get underneath

53:49

end of fucking

53:52

Yeah. He'd

53:52

do stuff. You'd but you'd get one or two shots before he

53:54

got completely out.

53:55

I think if you would like to

53:56

get out and I'd talk to him. For

53:59

wrestling. Oh, I

54:00

was fighting. I was standing there like this and allowed him to, yeah, get both my

54:02

arms, like a -- Yeah. -- like a damze Okay. Let's

54:04

get closer

54:04

to my address. You know what I mean? I just

54:06

don't see the

54:07

path to victory

54:10

here. But it would be fun to see how it would go. Yeah.

54:12

Definitely.

54:13

Yeah. Yeah. That's what I

54:15

mean.

54:15

Exactly. You win. Make make you make you

54:17

put me down with got you, bro.

54:19

He kicked me to

54:20

my Fairly convinced

54:21

he can beat a gorilla, though. So I

54:23

don't know. No. No. I mean, if I

54:25

started on his back, Beautiful.

54:28

Beautiful. You get a hunch on a chimpanzee.

54:30

Like, go to a dog chimpanzee.

54:33

put those carotid arteries. Do they have carotid

54:36

arteries? Do they? I mean I think

54:37

they have a remember, their their arms are like a

54:40

foot long. They're gonna grab Alright.

54:42

So you get full fledged rear naked choke

54:44

in hooks in, sunk.

54:46

We don't We trade the gorilla to start

54:48

hands on bees like you're gonna sling it.

54:51

Dude, he's on dude, he's on all

54:54

fours and you get to

54:56

your hooks in. You think you could choke a chop

54:57

and do it? Yeah. You're feel like he might

55:00

go about his day. Like, toss me Why

55:02

you off him? He might be

55:04

doing shit. But he would just move tearing

55:06

your ear off, you start fingering your eyes, your finger, he would You'd have to be clawed. And

55:08

you can't just have the I don't think it's the claws or

55:10

the issue, dude. I'll live the claws. I

55:14

think that fucking club. I think I think what he would do is so you

55:16

have he would literally grab your fingers

55:18

and start snapping them off your hands, and

55:20

you would let go

55:22

very quick.

55:22

This Jibese is so fucking strong. So he hasn't he hasn't he hasn't asked about

55:25

trims. Yeah. This is what they do when

55:27

they're attacking, when they're

55:28

fighting. first do

55:30

is go

55:31

They're afraid of you rate

55:33

by them. Okay. First, they break

55:35

your jaws so you

55:37

can't buy them. Then they break your fingers -- Yeah. -- then they tear

55:39

off your deck so that you can't rape them. In that

55:42

order? That that is their order of

55:43

operations. But do they

55:46

have some That'd be a great

55:48

board game for children. Yeah. Like operations. Yeah. You because you're

55:50

you're a champion, you're attacking him.

55:52

It's like, hangman. Like, he's Okay.

55:55

So he gets to wear a

55:57

cup? Are you out there? That's right. You're there's no way

55:59

you're gonna train a chimp to say no

56:02

small

56:03

limlock. Yeah. Like, he's just going for those figures. Yeah. I think that's what

56:06

I would

56:06

be knowing. Could he risk all you risk

56:08

lock or

56:09

ankle lock a chip?

56:11

Could you get a heel

56:12

hook on a chimp? Yeah. But they

56:13

have thumbs on their beard. If you I think if you

56:15

arm bar

56:16

the chimp, I think he can literally just curl

56:18

you like this. Yes, sir. I would

56:20

I would not I would not get the other I think the rear naked

56:22

chunkers I mean, just from a physiological standpoint,

56:24

they do have carotid arteries

56:28

I think if you went and, like, really sunken in,

56:30

I think there's a chance you could do it, dude.

56:32

We'll imagine the skin ripped off

56:34

your

56:35

back. Yeah. Is this thing you

56:37

get He just He tears your

56:39

face. He's gonna see your fucking lungs

56:41

through that back. He's gonna be, like, one

56:43

of those fucking viking Eagle foot --

56:45

No.

56:45

-- in How The eagle. If you guys want

56:48

ratings on slick and thick, this is the way to go. We

56:50

gotta get a full an

56:52

adult driller. A chicken. Not a

56:54

gorilla. Yeah. That's too much. A gorillas,

56:56

like chips, fine. A gorillas as

56:57

gorillas, that's a

57:00

stupid

57:00

conversation. This

57:01

one, however. Jim, this is completely silent. Well, he's also not we've had the

57:03

argument on

57:03

the show. Louis

57:03

thought he could beat up a moose.

57:06

No.

57:07

Things are huge. I looked at they're

57:09

fucking goofy. Oh, they're I've got no

57:12

issues. I fucking I'll I'll jah a movie.

57:14

Something's a

57:16

fucking jah. Right? Bang. You did you grabbed the

57:17

mousum behind. I come just four times. Right? And the judge put

57:19

it out. Now Lance had down soft. I don't

57:22

wanna see you versus a mousum or not

57:24

known

57:24

for the head versus Chappenzi.

57:26

Do me and make me me and making that on the centerline. Yeah. Me

57:29

and Nike versus the Moose

57:30

and a chimpanzee. How did chimpanzee ride

57:34

the

57:34

Moose? Oh, I don't know,

57:35

Kenny. It's just strange. Yeah. That's a

57:37

scary

57:37

situation. I think the Romans

57:40

might have

57:41

had something here. Yeah. With these kind

57:43

of fights. The road is the heavy hits. When I went to Rome, that was one of

57:46

the coolest things that I learned

57:48

about, like, at at the --

57:50

The

57:51

museum.

57:52

Was, like, the they have, like it was, like, they're, like, hunters. Yeah. They would call them.

57:54

Right? So you'd come out and they'd be a guy and

57:56

they'd release two lions. And he'd come in and

57:58

you'd have a fucking thing and he lived. Yeah,

58:01

dude. The Christian or the lion. Oh my god.

58:04

The lion. The lion. It looks so easy. But

58:06

they have these traps that they would like. It

58:08

was, like, very, like, advanced. It is these elevators that

58:10

they would have, like, they would have a

58:12

fucking, you know, a a camel

58:14

would come out. The the people in the room, there's on

58:16

TV, there's no encyclopedias,

58:18

there's nothing. They'd see an ostrich. It looked like a giant bird. Brett.

58:20

They'd never seen anything ever like

58:22

this in their lives. They're like, this is like

58:24

it's the equivalent of a dinosaur

58:26

to them. They're thinking these these exotic alien like

58:28

creatures -- Yeah. -- that are coming out. It was like

58:30

one of the most spectacular things that you

58:33

could possibly watch you didn't have to pay for

58:34

it. You were, like, poor it was free. It was

58:36

part of, like, you paying your taxes -- Yeah. -- was they

58:38

would give you

58:38

the games.

58:39

And when they had prosperous years, they would do the

58:41

games multiple times per year, Sometimes

58:43

they wouldn't have the games for a few years because thinking about what the

58:45

most expensive animal in ancient

58:45

Rome was. Puerto Rican.

58:48

Do you know? I'll

58:51

give you guess. Not the elephant

58:53

Augusta Tiger. The giraffe. Oh. Because the

58:56

giraffe would die. Got it. When he put it on

58:58

the when he put it on

59:00

the boats, for whatever reason they

59:02

died all the time on the boats. Suddenly they tried

59:04

to bring them through land, and then they

59:06

would die in the Alps with the

59:07

cold. So with getting an

59:09

actual live giraffe. To Rome. To Rome was the most expensive Get

59:11

all this information more on slick and

59:13

thick. Hey. Have you been to Rome? No.

59:15

One of the fucking coolest things I've ever done

59:17

in my entire life. Yeah.

59:19

Go home. My kid was great, but I it forced me to do

59:21

the cultural side of things, which is like going

59:24

to the Vatican, going to

59:26

the coliseum, you know, really appreciating the architecture and the art and just like,

59:28

you know, when I'm with a chick or I go

59:30

by myself

59:31

somewhere, like, it's not

59:33

just really ignore the cultural side. I mean, there's just Wait.

59:36

Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. I wanna be glut I

59:38

wanna drink. I wanna do drugs. I wanna fucking

59:40

do whatever I'm doing. Right? my

59:42

like, really dude, it was just so cool. Go to

59:44

the Vatican. Dude, the Vatican, I did a

59:46

four hour tour. I could have done there's six hour tours

59:48

and eight hour tours. I could have easily done a two day tour of

59:50

the Vatican. There's so much

59:51

Mhmm. -- and so many cool stories.

59:54

I I recommend it to anybody in the world. And the

59:56

food

59:57

was fucking there

59:59

ain't nothing but carbs, a number of pizza, nothing but

1:00:01

pasta, I was wait. Well, they say that's

1:00:03

because of how clean the stuff is it comes from

1:00:05

the -- Yep. -- local area. There's no preservatives

1:00:07

any of

1:00:08

that. I know mix very big on on no preservatives, no oils,

1:00:10

that sort of stuff. Yeah, dude. The grains,

1:00:12

like

1:00:12

ancient grains that are like fucking

1:00:15

no bad

1:00:15

oils, you know. Yeah. It's good stuff.

1:00:18

It's the best. Love it. Can't let's go

1:00:20

back. Alright, Chen. Unless who does it

1:00:22

live? We got a little bit of time

1:00:24

left

1:00:24

here. Does it live?

1:00:26

The

1:00:27

Australian avalanche. Which

1:00:29

one's better, Shannon? You

1:00:33

have

1:00:33

a ranch or the plane crash?

1:00:35

Probably with the plane crash. Alright. Let's go

1:00:37

with the plane crash.

1:00:38

Okay. Here you go.

1:00:41

So right now, Shane was gonna show as part of a

1:00:43

video, and we're gonna decide whether or not

1:00:45

the people involved passed

1:00:46

away, lived, some of them lived, some

1:00:49

of them died, a This plane turns

1:00:50

into fireball. I'm saying no. Just to

1:00:53

let

1:00:53

you know, there's

1:00:53

also there's only two people

1:00:56

on the plane, a passenger, and the

1:00:58

pilot. Okay. Good enough.

1:01:03

Alright, bro. Uh-oh. Uh-uh.

1:01:07

Oh, whoa. Thank

1:01:10

you. If

1:01:11

they died, if

1:01:14

they died, I hope they died on

1:01:16

impact and then it drowned then it's

1:01:18

normal.

1:01:19

Yeah. I'm gonna say

1:01:22

they died only because it looked like such a

1:01:24

nothing that

1:01:25

I'm like, that that had to be worse than it seemed. And when a fling

1:01:27

flips like that, like, I'm pretty sure, like, that's not

1:01:29

good. That's not the really holiday

1:01:31

death. Is it?

1:01:34

Roy Holiday died

1:01:35

very similar to I don't know. Yeah. I say I say

1:01:38

Yeah. Died,

1:01:40

aren't you?

1:01:41

doing tricks

1:01:42

in his plane and then he crashed in

1:01:44

the ocean. Gently

1:01:45

crashed into the ocean like that. I

1:01:47

guess. I don't know.

1:01:49

111 and one.

1:01:50

I'm gonna go pilot the high passenger survive.

1:01:53

That's fucking bullshit. You

1:01:54

can hedge like that. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Gonna

1:01:56

go ahead and get a pilot live. How should we go?

1:01:58

The pilot okay. Yeah. The the pilot instinctively protected

1:02:00

himself. Wait. Wait. I need I need

1:02:03

more

1:02:03

information. Was the pilot a man

1:02:05

or a woman? Shannon. They're both men.

1:02:07

Oh, they're the pilot. They

1:02:07

lived. Yeah. They're men. They're okay

1:02:09

then. They're men's pines.

1:02:10

Shannon, what happened? Okay.

1:02:12

The the only passenger was

1:02:15

former Santa Monica mayor Rex

1:02:17

Minter, and he died, but the pilot

1:02:20

lived. Wow.

1:02:20

That's me. No.

1:02:21

That's me.

1:02:23

You won one night with Natalie

1:02:25

and her girlfriend. Congratulations, Richard.

1:02:28

It's a big win. That's a big win.

1:02:30

Natalie, you could set Well, the

1:02:32

thirty ten thousand dollars on the table.

1:02:34

Ten thousand

1:02:34

dollars. You'd

1:02:35

pay it for ten thousand dollars. You'd

1:02:37

slant. Like he said, if the money were on the table, I

1:02:39

don't know what I will

1:02:41

on TV. Gals Gals like Gerdard is

1:02:43

a weird way. Right? I

1:02:44

think so. Yeah. I think

1:02:46

Gerd. It's a, you know,

1:02:48

They know they're gonna eat well.

1:02:50

Sure. At wintertime too, he's coveted

1:02:53

for his warmth. This

1:02:56

is the con this is the con you get it low. True. It's very true. Your

1:02:58

climate? Yeah. This

1:02:59

is it. III will say I did much better

1:03:01

when I lived up here than that in Florida.

1:03:03

That's true.

1:03:03

You're not

1:03:05

can't hide other other layers down there. Yeah.

1:03:07

You're

1:03:07

you're losing points in Florida.

1:03:08

Yeah. Big time. The winter is so great for men.

1:03:10

We have a way, Rob. We just look we look

1:03:13

so awesome. You look fucking regal. Women peak open. Yeah. Women

1:03:15

in the winter, they look like fucking slobs. Yeah.

1:03:17

Makes me sense. Very true. Yeah. Yeah.

1:03:19

When when

1:03:21

summertime women are fucking. Meanwhile, this is longest

1:03:22

I've ever seen him with a shirt on ever.

1:03:24

So Yeah. It's

1:03:25

killing me too. I just wanna

1:03:27

take that off. So badly.

1:03:29

Jones. What is his last story? I thought I had

1:03:31

Lyme disease. It turned out I had a tampon

1:03:33

in for two years.

1:03:36

What?

1:03:36

You're a cow. Shannon, that

1:03:38

was Jenna's diary. Oh.

1:03:41

Dude, a diary. So

1:03:43

it's this chick Melanie Galia's,

1:03:46

where she said that when she was

1:03:48

younger, she had Lyme disease. So she

1:03:50

remembered what the pain and what the

1:03:53

feelings were. And so when she was little bit older, she thought she had

1:03:55

Lyme disease again. She went to the doctor and they're

1:03:57

like, no. Everything's fine. I don't know what's happening. And

1:03:59

then she went to the gynecologist and the

1:04:02

gynecologist real lies that had

1:04:04

a tampon that was in her

1:04:07

cervix horizontally. Mhmm. So it got

1:04:09

stuck and it turned inside of her. Mhmm. And

1:04:11

that's what led to the

1:04:13

toxic sock shock

1:04:13

syndrome, which is, I guess, similar to the

1:04:16

feeling of having Lyme disease. Wow.

1:04:18

Is

1:04:18

there a picture of the schick? Yeah. Nice.

1:04:22

No. There

1:04:22

it goes. Tuxedo. She looks like

1:04:25

she has toxic shock. Yeah, dude.

1:04:28

Teenaged

1:04:28

girl. Oh,

1:04:28

she's a teenage girl? Alright. Well No. No. It was A0I

1:04:31

okay. Yeah. Sorry. I thought that the

1:04:33

Lyme disease happened I was

1:04:35

literally just a teenage girl. That's fucking

1:04:38

ranted. I remember one time I fuck the

1:04:40

chick, and she forgot the tampon

1:04:42

in there. And we we, like, walking that thing up. Yeah. Jan's Corey.

1:04:44

-- snowing back. Yeah. And three

1:04:46

and a half deep inches deep.

1:04:50

And

1:04:50

yeah. And then yeah. We found, like, two days later, I had to

1:04:52

pull it out of her teeth. She

1:04:55

fell the instructions.

1:04:57

I've done that before, though. I have actually pulled a tampon out with my

1:04:59

teeth. Oh, girl. To be funny, hit you in the channel. We

1:05:01

have a little bloodmark.

1:05:02

Nice. Yeah. Do you find do

1:05:04

you when you find women, they wanna date you

1:05:07

or they just wanna, like, fuck you. Which

1:05:09

women want to marry

1:05:10

me? They wanna marry. It's not just date me. They wanna

1:05:12

fuck him. They want it all. They don't nobody just

1:05:14

want to be the queen. They want they want the

1:05:16

keys

1:05:16

to the empire. They want the

1:05:17

whole thing. Yeah. They want the thing. Yeah. I mean,

1:05:19

the certain

1:05:20

girls in shows would fuck me, but

1:05:22

you know, that's crazy. They they

1:05:23

wanna be Solo dollar. Yeah. How do you navigate

1:05:25

that situation? Man

1:05:27

down. I usually

1:05:28

just end up in by

1:05:30

falling in relationship. What do I use,

1:05:32

Zach? How do you fight? I've

1:05:34

been married for a while. Yeah.

1:05:37

But, yeah, I've I've been I've been on my trip for,

1:05:39

like, seven years. Really?

1:05:40

Yeah. Before that,

1:05:42

I had no value. I

1:05:43

had been going on.

1:05:44

Until, like, be it married for seven years? You feel like there's just nothing wrong with me. Fucked

1:05:46

this up or

1:05:47

what up on married, but I

1:05:48

I'm taking it. Cool. Cool. If she cheated,

1:05:50

are you? Would you would you ever married? She

1:05:54

had David said, but would you end the marriage then? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You'd end it? Oh,

1:05:56

yeah. You just say that's it? Oh, yeah.

1:05:58

One discretion. Yeah. So ten years I

1:06:00

haven't been as good the fuck didn't have

1:06:03

fucking

1:06:03

up. She can yeah. It's still gonna be

1:06:05

true. And but wait.

1:06:08

You could she could be with you for ten

1:06:09

years. That's three thousand six hundred and fifty

1:06:12

fucking days. Yeah. Clean. Yeah.

1:06:14

Fucks up one night. Yeah. One bad night and three

1:06:16

hundred

1:06:16

should have invited me. Should have invited

1:06:18

me. Alright. Fair enough. Yeah. There's a

1:06:19

it's just a difference. If if my check cheated on

1:06:22

me, I'd fuck can it'd just be over. I can never I can never unsee Yeah.

1:06:24

Whereas I think women can it's just

1:06:26

like the whole, you know, the reasoning behind

1:06:28

it or whatever else it is, like,

1:06:32

Like a dude, it's just masturbating with another woman.

1:06:34

That's all you're doing. You're just trying to get

1:06:36

off. It's just that a woman, it's just

1:06:38

not the same thing. A woman,

1:06:40

she wanted to feel something. Yeah. Girls have feelings and stuff. A woman wanted to

1:06:43

feel something that night, you know, and

1:06:45

it's, you know, just a little

1:06:47

bit. It's just I I hate to be, you know, to have a

1:06:49

double standard, but it's just so worse offense when

1:06:52

a woman cheats and when a man cheats, unquestionably.

1:06:54

And I think the women that are in the booth would agree

1:06:56

with that. Right, ladies?

1:07:00

I I guess a majority of the time.

1:07:02

Yes, I

1:07:03

agree. Damn. There's an intimacy, so it's the

1:07:06

intimacy that hurts. Not the you

1:07:08

know, not the physical.

1:07:08

It's not so much she had to consider her. It's just that it's she

1:07:11

it's an it's an emotional

1:07:13

she's cheating emotionally. Whereas

1:07:16

you're cheating just physically. If she's gonna go and fuck somebody else, it's it's

1:07:18

because she's a

1:07:19

woman, she can fuck anybody

1:07:21

else. She emotionally, she feels

1:07:24

depleted or deprived in the relationship. So she

1:07:26

went for it elsewhere, and she's able to look

1:07:28

at sex just at intimacy

1:07:30

in place of emotion. Sure. But that think it's a

1:07:32

deeper seeded problem. Ultimately,

1:07:34

you know, I think if you cheat on your significant other

1:07:36

regardless, if I cheat on my girlfriend, she should break up with

1:07:38

me and never give it with me again. I'm not saying that

1:07:41

that that I should be excused. I'm just saying

1:07:43

it's actually worse. Unquestionably, it's worse if a woman

1:07:45

shoots at a man.

1:07:47

Okay. I agree. We all agree with that. I

1:07:49

don't know. I feel like the you say the double standard is Women

1:07:52

could cheat on you and get away with it whenever they fucking

1:07:56

want. Right? But if they fucking just throw it hard on this.

1:07:58

Yeah. Or is this something? They're

1:08:00

fucking but they they can get away with it

1:08:02

whenever

1:08:03

they want. If if she's cheating on you and you know about it,

1:08:05

because she wants you to know about it. Right. That's that's

1:08:07

what's

1:08:07

fucked up.

1:08:07

No. I mean, I

1:08:08

think I used to be, like, crazy. I used to, like, go through

1:08:10

my girl's phone and, like, like that.

1:08:12

Like, my girl now, she, like, leaves her phone open on the bed, and I get the the thought. Sometimes I see

1:08:15

it and I go, I can just literally just

1:08:17

for a second and

1:08:19

be, like, who's But what's the point? It's not even

1:08:21

so much that, like, I don't think she's cheating. I mean, I don't think she would ever cheat. I mean, she doesn't have the energy of

1:08:23

somebody who would cheat. But I guarantee

1:08:26

there's dudes in her fucking

1:08:28

DMs. I guarantee there's, like, guys, like, you know, so what's

1:08:30

the point of getting myself angry and worked up? You know, if I'm in a

1:08:33

place where I think she's cheating on me and I

1:08:35

have to go through her phone, relationships

1:08:39

aren't It's it's like, I like, I've now

1:08:41

recognized that in myself. Like, if I'm

1:08:43

in that toxic of a

1:08:45

place, It's done. And I would and that's why

1:08:47

every relationship had past years, make me. like, just six and bounce. It's not me

1:08:49

being irresponsible. It's me recognizing that

1:08:52

it's not going

1:08:55

to be a long term thing. And I'm not gonna waste years of somebody's life anymore,

1:08:57

which is what I we all do in our twenties.

1:08:59

We just waste

1:09:02

people's time. So I date people for, you know, a few months,

1:09:04

see if it works out, see if the vibe is there, and if it's

1:09:06

not, if not. You lease your cars. No. You don't buy them.

1:09:08

Exactly. Alright.

1:09:10

We gotta wrap this one. Thank

1:09:12

you so much for joining us today on the

1:09:14

show, Micky Gollinger, or Michael's. Please check out the

1:09:16

slick and thick podcast, company guesses on that

1:09:18

one. Please. January ninth. I believe is there --

1:09:19

Monday. -- January to so, yeah, we're

1:09:21

gonna have

1:09:21

a great time

1:09:22

with these guys. Thank you guys very much. Have

1:09:24

a happy New Year. We'll be back on

1:09:26

Monday with the first episode of the

1:09:28

year. Actually, I think

1:09:30

I'm gonna be recording in LA. So be way,

1:09:36

fucking New Year's Eve in the comedy

1:09:38

story is a fucking big deal. That's huge. Thank you very much. That's really from a comedian. That's like Thanks,

1:09:40

man. That's sick.

1:09:41

That's a great day Yankee Stadium. That's

1:09:43

that's fucking big league I

1:09:46

love the comedy store and they do great stuff for

1:09:48

us. So please come out and support that. And, yeah,

1:09:50

we'll check you guys next week. Peace. Hell

1:09:54

yeah. That's

1:09:59

all folks.

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