0:05

Hello and welcome to Real Bible Stories . Join

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us as we deep dive into the historic , religious

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, cultural , political and

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emotional context surrounding the real

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lives of real people in the Bible and the

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stories we've all grown to love . Hello

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and welcome to Real Bible Stories . I'm

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your host , imran Ward , and we are joined

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by my wife , selena . Hi and our teacher

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, Pastor Ryan Brown . What's going on everyone ? I'm

0:32

sure that if you're tuned in here , you're

0:34

noticing that something's a little bit different . We are

0:36

now doing this on video

0:39

, All right , so really

0:42

what's happening is that by the way , Imran did not

0:44

tell us we were doing this on video so

0:46

I mean we showed up and he showed

0:48

up looking great . The rest of us are uh

0:50

, it's like huh , I don't know

0:53

, I basically figured it out on the way over

0:55

. I was like , if I'm not , if I wasn't gonna do it , now I'm not gonna do

0:57

it , so we're gonna try it out . So we

0:59

are in the new uh

1:01

palms baptist church studio that we've been working

1:03

on the last like two months in

1:06

here , and so this is now the first kind of large

1:08

format broadcast that we're doing inside

1:10

of the room . So we're just taking the podcast

1:13

and now you are now seated in the room with us

1:15

as we enjoy a

1:17

real Bible stories

1:20

message from our pastor , pastor

1:22

Ryan Brown and our coffee , which usually

1:25

it's more bougie than this . Yeah , so

1:28

they got the cups and the milk and all

1:30

the things .

1:31

But I think you got to tell them what's

1:33

going on .

1:34

Well , why are we ?

1:35

here , and why are we not ? Why are we not bougie today

1:37

?

1:39

So usually we're doing this recording

1:41

in my house , but what is going

1:43

on now is that we're actually packing

1:45

up our house . So if you've been listening

1:47

to a couple episodes , you know that I'm in the Marine Corps and

1:50

so I actually got orders over to Quantico , Virginia

1:52

, so I'll be heading out there in

1:55

the next month and a half to two months , so

1:58

my wife's heading out , Selena's heading out in the next couple weeks

2:00

, and then I'll be heading out a few weeks after

2:02

that in the next couple

2:04

of weeks , and then I'll be heading out a few weeks after that . So

2:07

this episode we actually I wanted to spruce it up and we're actually sprucing it up because it's going to be our last

2:09

one for a while . We're going to

2:11

be pausing and

2:13

really praying a lot about what

2:15

this transition is looking like and if

2:18

we can really continue the podcast

2:20

in the way that we really want to while

2:23

we're in Virginia and and Ryan's

2:25

here . I mean , God made a path for us to

2:27

build this studio in our last two months

2:29

here . So that's , uh , this like

2:32

this didn't exist yeah . We didn't have

2:34

an option two months ago and now we have a really

2:36

, really nice place where Ryan can come in

2:38

and teach from um , even if we're

2:40

doing it kind of disparate . So

2:42

just keep us in your prayers as

2:45

we transition over to Virginia . Keep Ryan

2:47

in your prayers as he continues

2:49

to grow as a young pastor

2:51

and teaching the youth of our church and also

2:54

leading this pastoral

2:56

ministry as well . That is Real Bible Stories

2:58

. I actually got such an awesome story

3:00

from him right before we started where a

3:02

truck driver that goes to our church told him that

3:06

this podcast is what led him to , uh

3:08

, become saved , that the , the

3:10

clarity and the detail that came from the kind of the

3:12

, the in-depth studies that we do

3:14

on the podcast , is what really drew him um

3:16

in to the family completely

3:19

, and so I know that this podcast is

3:21

touching lives . I know that it's um

3:23

, I know that definitely

3:26

for me , it's grown my depth and my understanding

3:28

. It's really made it so that God

3:31

just becomes more and more real every time we do

3:33

this and , ryan , I truly appreciate you for that

3:35

.

3:36

I appreciate you all and I'll

3:38

tell you this Emran chose a doozy of

3:40

a week to record this one of a week

3:43

to record this one , to make this kind of our last one for break , because we're

3:45

going to hit probably one of the most seemingly

3:48

offensive verses .

3:50

Controversial .

3:51

Yeah , in the Bible , but it's

3:53

actually very beautiful once you understand

3:55

it . So don't listen

3:57

to it and then just click off because it makes

4:01

you so angry Stick with it , oh my gosh yeah

4:03

. But the reason I chose this cause I

4:05

didn't know this was going to be our last one for a while Um

4:07

, it's cause . This is actually when we first started this when

4:10

we first met yeah , not even started this

4:12

when we first met . My introduction

4:14

to Emron and Selena was like hey , uh

4:16

, our marriage is in shambles . Like can you save

4:18

us and I'm like I can't save you to anything , right .

4:20

Like um you , you know only god

4:22

can do that . I was told to come talk to you .

4:24

Yeah , and he's like well , I was told you're the guy

4:26

and I was like , okay , well , you know what's going

4:28

on and and some of the initial

4:30

I get , and I'm just not counseling but like

4:33

discussions , yeah , discussions that we were having

4:35

just about what was going on and I had

4:37

brought up this study , um , because

4:39

it was one that was somewhat recent at that time , and

4:42

um , they've been asking to do

4:44

this since we began the podcast and

4:46

we've never done it .

4:47

And this was almost two and a half years ago

4:49

.

4:49

This was so . I was like you know . It's also like one of the most

4:51

popular studies you've done at the church

4:53

. It's like the women's ministry talked about it .

4:55

It is . It is one , yeah , it

4:57

is one , that is . It

5:00

is one people have remembered , that

5:08

is true , and but one . I did this for them because we can't go on break and with the uncertainty of the

5:11

future and what that's going to look like and not actually have done it . But

5:13

to your point , right , with

5:16

this study , you know what ? Before

5:18

I even get into that story , I think we should

5:20

read it first , just so people know what

5:22

we're talking about .

5:23

Okay , yeah , absolutely .

5:25

We're going to be dancing around this , but

5:28

we're going to anchor here because this is one of those

5:30

, like I said , it gets everybody's feathers

5:32

a little ruffled .

5:35

So get ready , go for it , selena All right , yeah

5:37

, so our verse is 1 Peter

5:40

3 , verses 1

5:42

through 7 . Oh , this is .

5:44

Peter Peter 3 , verses 1 through 7 .

5:45

Wives in the same way . Submit yourselves to

5:47

your own husbands so that , if

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any of them do not believe the word , they

5:51

may be won over without words

5:54

by the behavior of their wives when

5:56

they see the purity and reverence of

5:58

your lives . Your beauty should

6:00

not come from outward adornment

6:03

, such as elaborate hairstyles

6:05

and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine

6:07

clothes . Rather , it should be

6:09

that of your inner self

6:11

, the unfading beauty of a gentle

6:13

and quiet spirit which is of great

6:16

worth in God's sight . For this

6:18

is the way the holy women of the

6:20

past who put their hope in God used

6:22

to adorn themselves . Of

6:26

the past , who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves . They submitted

6:28

themselves to their own husbands . Like Sarah , who obeyed Abraham

6:30

and called him her Lord , you

6:32

are her daughters if you do what is

6:34

right and do not give way to fear

6:37

Husbands . In the same way

6:39

, be considerate as you live with

6:41

your wives and treat them with respect

6:44

, as the weaker partner and as heirs

6:46

, with you , of the gracious gift of

6:48

life , so that nothing will hinder

6:50

your prayers .

6:52

And where is that from again ?

6:54

First Peter , chapter three , one

6:57

through seven .

6:58

One through seven . Okay , thank you so much . So

7:00

, actually , before the podcast started , brian

7:02

told us the scripture . I didn't hear

7:05

him say the scripture but I was reading

7:07

the scripture . Yeah , she was reading it and I was like oh man

7:09

, that sounds like proverbs .

7:10

31 and you got like three long answers

7:12

, not proverbs .

7:12

31 , I was like oh well , then it sounds

7:15

like first corinthians , because I just um a few

7:17

few months ago now

7:19

uh , I was going through first corinthians

7:21

, um , for my sister's wedding

7:24

. I did a tribute

7:27

. What's it called ? A toast . I did a toast and I quoted

7:29

some scripture out of first Corinthians , and Ryan's

7:32

like nope , not there either . And I was like is this , is

7:34

this Paul at all ? And he's like nope , not that either

7:37

. I was like all right , well , I have no idea . It's like I

7:39

know these words , but I

7:44

said .

7:45

It's one of those that if you

7:47

do not understand what is going on

7:49

with that statement , it could sound

7:51

very abrasive , right ? So , women be

7:53

subject to your husbands right . Call

7:55

him Lord . Men like

7:57

, even when it goes to the men , right . Men likewise

8:00

like be considerate of your

8:02

wife or she is the weaker partner . Right

8:04

. Like it's even offensive . What version

8:07

of ?

8:07

this Bible is this it is NIM .

8:10

So we're going to break this down , because

8:13

not only does it one

8:16

, is that not really the point being made

8:18

? It's actually

8:20

teaching us to a much higher ideal

8:22

than a Christian

8:25

ideal that we don't talk about much , and

8:27

when we do talk about it , we talk about it like

8:29

almost in the confines of only exclusively

8:31

marriage and um , which is

8:33

submission right . And um

8:36

, submission is a very Christian concept

8:38

. It is to

8:40

men , it is to women , it is to husbands

8:42

, it is to wives , it is , it is to

8:44

everybody . Um , this is not something

8:46

just for women and wives

8:48

, right ? This is an expectation

8:51

of every single believer who calls

8:53

Jesus Lord . It's to submit

8:55

Submission

8:59

, right , about this particular verse or

9:02

this series of text . Peter's

9:05

actually not leading the

9:08

reader to a point about marriage

9:10

. Oh really , he's

9:12

using marriage as an example for

9:15

something else . So the whole point

9:17

of the text isn't even actually meant to be teaching

9:19

you about marriage . Now , it's

9:21

exposing a truth or a reality about

9:23

it , but it it's not like

9:25

he's not teaching on marriage at this point . Does that make

9:27

sense ? It

9:29

actually belongs to a much larger main

9:31

point and this is like a substantiating

9:33

point to that higher message

9:36

. So I

9:39

would also say that submission

9:42

in itself , it's

9:44

not as black and white as people

9:46

like to think . It is

9:48

Okay . You know what I mean . Like like

9:52

this is one of those verses that

9:54

unfortunately has been abused

9:57

um used to abuse and suppress

10:00

women for for um

10:02

you know , throughout history .

10:03

Let me take it out of context .

10:04

Um , you know , you , you , let me take it out of context

10:06

. You

10:10

know you take something like this out of context and you take only that , not understanding

10:12

the larger reality of what it belongs to . It's

10:14

used against women , and you

10:16

know . If you

10:19

know , it says right here in the Bible , right ? And if

10:21

you are not equipped to understand

10:23

what it's , what it's really saying like

10:26

you silence a

10:30

voice right where if

10:32

she's trying to be faithful and God honoring

10:34

as a woman and she may

10:36

be like that doesn't feel right or doesn't seem to make sense

10:38

. But at the same time the Bible says

10:40

it and I know Christ is real , but

10:43

I struggle with that . So I guess I'll you know . Guess I'll

10:45

do it . I know Christ is real but I struggle with that , so I guess I'll you know , I guess I'll

10:47

do it . I don't know . You know what I mean . Yeah , um , so

10:49

they end up trying to live to a biblical

10:51

principle faithfully , in

10:53

confusion , and

10:56

that can , but that can also

10:58

leave you open to exploit as well .

11:00

Correct , so even if you're not , even

11:02

if you're not living in a society that's intentionally suppressing

11:05

or oppressing women or

11:07

whomever . If you're saying

11:10

like , well , I must submit because that's Christ-like

11:13

, but you're not doing it with the right context

11:15

in mind , you can be opening yourself

11:17

up to abuse and exploit

11:19

as well you know . So that's speaking .

11:21

And it has . It has been used for that Right

11:23

, and the sad reality is and we're going to talk about

11:25

it more in depth here in a second but

11:27

you know , the

11:31

church over the years

11:33

hasn't done the best job of really

11:35

explaining what

11:38

is a man and what is a woman .

11:39

What is a man and what is a woman ?

11:41

Right , you know , I think the church

11:43

does well with understanding the

11:46

value that human beings were

11:48

created as , and I think it does a good job

11:50

of explaining identity and

11:53

purpose and all those things

11:55

collectively . But what

11:58

are the differentials that separate

12:00

men and women ? Because there are , they're

12:02

obvious , right ? And you look

12:04

in culture right now of you

12:06

know , everybody's

12:09

surprised by the fact that there's so much confusion

12:11

around gender identity in this culture and

12:14

and , and the truth is is that I don't , I'm not

12:16

sure a lot of people really understand , um

12:20

, you know , what

12:22

a man and a godly man and a godly woman is

12:24

like . What does that really mean ? And

12:26

so when you misunderstand that

12:28

and you read a verse like this , it opens

12:31

the door for a lot

12:33

more other stuff that could be thrown in

12:35

there . Some craziness , right ? Yeah . And

12:37

no , I was getting ready to tell

12:39

the story . But , um , when I first

12:41

taught this , we were all going through , first Peter . Um

12:44

, I was the discipleship pastor at

12:46

that time . I was teaching the men on

12:48

Thursdays . No

12:50

, I'm sorry , I was teaching the men Tuesdays . The

12:53

women were doing the same Bible study on Thursdays

12:55

.

12:56

So we were going through the same material and you were

12:58

teaching it as well .

12:59

No , oh okay , I was not , but

13:02

we were doing the same material . So my idea for

13:04

this particular night is I had I said

13:06

hey , as we're talking through this verse

13:08

, like I reached out to Trissa Pittman who

13:10

was on the podcast at one point and said

13:12

, hey , can you just grab

13:14

you and just a couple other strong women and join the

13:16

men tonight , and I just I

13:18

want you in there as we , as

13:20

I teach through this , so you can provide a feminine

13:23

perspective of this verse

13:25

, what these things and concepts mean , Because

13:28

people don't realize how vastly different men and women

13:30

are . Like we are Like people know

13:32

we're different .

13:32

I think people realize it , but

13:35

it's like for some reason we in recent years have

13:37

refused to admit it , like most

13:39

of all of human history

13:41

. We understand that we're different

13:43

.

13:43

No people understand . But I don't think people understand

13:45

how different and a lot of the thing

13:49

with that is , because that's how God made us . So

13:51

it says that in Genesis 127

13:53

, let us make them both male and female in

13:56

our image . That means the image of men

13:58

was out of God's image and the image

14:00

of women are out of God's image . They

14:02

took the feminine qualities of God . We

14:10

took the masculine qualities of God . We took the masculine qualities of God . So one of

14:12

the good thing is that you should actually recognize the difference between men and women and

14:14

, as a woman , you should be looking at men and saying what does understanding

14:16

men particularly if you're married , right , like my husband

14:18

, what is he communicating to me

14:20

about the character of God ? Because

14:23

he was created in his image , so

14:25

the things that are central to

14:27

his desires and his purpose and what he

14:29

needs , which seems to be so much different for

14:31

me , like what does that show me about

14:33

who God is ? And men likewise , we should

14:35

be looking at women like well , as

14:38

women are like , created out of his character

14:41

and his in his image , and taking

14:43

on that quality . What is what do they teach us about

14:45

God ?

14:45

Yeah , right . So that's kind of fascinating

14:47

too , cause once when you put those , if

14:49

like with marriage , the concept of marriage , um

14:52

, I guess the closest to an image of God we would

14:54

have would be the man and the woman together

14:56

They'll be closer to the full character and unity

14:58

of the full identity and image

15:00

of God . Yeah , that's fascinating identity and image of God in marriage

15:03

.

15:03

Right and um , you

15:05

know , women I think I was just actually talking to my wife about

15:07

this right before I came . Um , there

15:11

just seems to be this thing , you know , with

15:13

women , where it's they

15:15

either get into this place of either

15:18

they feel a place of insufficiency

15:20

that I'm not enough , Like I'm not . I'm

15:23

not enough as a wife , I'm not enough doing enough

15:25

as a mother , doing enough as a daughter

15:27

or sister , or you know whatever . And

15:30

if they're not feeling the sense of shame

15:32

of not being good enough , they're

15:35

, on the other end , being told you're too much

15:37

right , You're you're you're . You're

15:40

too sensitive , you're being too dramatic

15:42

, you're being too emotional , you're right . Particularly

15:44

things . Men tell them Right , and they've

15:47

then fully . Then they're like okay , so now I'm being

15:49

too much , but if I'm less

15:52

of that , it's not who I feel like I need to

15:54

be , but then I'm insufficient . There

15:56

it's like where is that sweet spot for

15:58

women ? And men need that too , right . The

16:00

reason I'm kind of focusing on the women , though , is because

16:02

of this verse , right . Right , the reason I'm kind of focusing on the

16:04

women , though , is because of this verse , right , and this is

16:07

really kind of where we're going to be anchored to understanding

16:09

this a little bit more . But

16:14

my point was is that I brought in the women and to this men's Bible study to get their

16:16

perspective , and it went really , really great , like it was awesome . So Trista

16:18

was like hey , can you do the same

16:20

thing for us Thursday ? I

16:23

was like you want me to bring some men in ? She's like well , can you

16:25

just teach it ? Like I think just you being there providing

16:27

that perspective would be enough . I'm like , oh , that'd be great

16:29

. Yeah , awesome , right .

16:30

Yeah .

16:31

Not thinking about the fact that I'm coming in to teach on

16:33

submission to your husband , and

16:50

so I , man , walking in with this group of women , I could tell you what the looks . I got the tension

16:52

in there . When we first started I was like , oh boy , I was not prepared for this and um , why

16:54

didn't she warn me ? Oh yeah , it was , it was , it was palpable , right

16:56

. And it turned out fine . It's a texture

16:58

in the air , yeah . It turned out fine

17:00

, but it but

17:05

initially right , like there's cause . It's one of those verses . So as we

17:07

get into this , let me just kind of , I think , crush a couple myths

17:09

about submission as a whole . Okay , cause

17:11

, like I said , it's a larger Christian concept , right

17:13

? I

17:16

think some people believe that submission

17:18

in itself is like almost

17:20

like it shows that you're weak , that you're

17:22

weaker . So if you're

17:24

to be an alpha man

17:27

right , an alpha male to submit

17:29

means I have to go be a beta . Yeah

17:31

, I think that's definitely a big cultural thing

17:34

, it is .

17:35

Yeah , as one that interacts

17:37

with hundreds and hundreds of 18-year-olds

17:40

every day Marines right . Young

17:42

Marines of our

17:44

nation's fighting core . Uh , it

17:47

is so important to them to be seen

17:49

as strong at

17:51

the expense of reason

17:53

, at the expense of uh

17:55

intelligence , at the expense of

17:57

slowing down and making clear and concise

18:00

decisions . Uh , they're more

18:02

focused on being cool or

18:04

being out and above than

18:06

doing something that makes sense . You

18:09

know , it's like if this guy can jump here , I'm

18:11

gonna try and jump up here . Oh , and I'm gonna try and

18:13

jump up here . Oh , I broke my ankle , you know , but

18:15

I was cool when I did it

18:17

. You know , it's like that there's

18:20

, and I guess I was there too , yeah , that's

18:22

definitely me well it's like , yeah

18:24

, that was you in high school For

18:27

some reason .

18:27

I married you . But you also see , though , like you know

18:29

, in particularly and I see this with women too , women

18:31

bicker probably more than men

18:33

do to be . I mean , would you disagree with that

18:36

?

18:36

I mean , I tend to see How's

18:38

Christ Women's Fellowship with the bickering ?

18:40

Right , there is a lot of drama .

18:42

I'm just saying she's like I'm not about

18:44

to confess anything . I know you don't want to .

18:48

I'm not going to confess anything . Generally

18:50

there's more drama within those circles . But

18:53

I will say this when I see it with men right

18:56

is that when you see those , you got two

18:58

men who are their egos are

19:00

matched and where one of

19:02

them just needs to submit Right

19:05

, and there's generally always some sort of construct

19:07

or like there there's

19:10

a boundary to understand . Now

19:12

, like , as a man , I need to submit to this other

19:14

man in this issue , in this situation

19:17

.

19:17

And you know , there's like an established chain of command

19:19

or something rules or like

19:21

rules of manhood Right , like , we just

19:23

understand or like .

19:24

but I mean even beyond that like rules of manhood right , like we just understand or like . But I mean even beyond that like

19:26

. And part of what we're going to talk about tonight is like a hierarchy

19:28

of look , if you're in church and you're in

19:30

it with your against your pastor right , there

19:33

comes a point where you just you have to submit to your pastor . You're

19:35

told to do that right . Marriage

19:37

there comes a point where you

19:40

have to submit to your wife , you have to submit to your husband

19:42

, like , there's just certain you

19:44

know , boundaries that are set with that . And

19:47

what you see is when men feel

19:49

like , particularly men to man to man , or woman

19:51

to woman , it's like , well , if I , if

19:54

I submit , then I'm going to be seen as the weaker the beta

19:56

. Right , and that's not true . A

19:58

submission takes strength . Sometimes it takes more

20:00

strength than it is to continue going

20:03

Right . The other thing I would say too

20:05

is .

20:05

I think that to submit is different than to be

20:07

kind of broken into that

20:10

submission , so like if you were like I'm not going to submit

20:12

, I'm not going to sit , and then you get broken into that and

20:15

now you are forced to

20:17

submit , then I can , I guess could

20:19

be seen as weak .

20:31

But if you submit out of strength of understanding , like it is not my place to be , that right now , well

20:33

, forced submission is forced submission is slavery , ooh , right . So being forced to submit to something , that

20:36

that's , that's tyranny , that that is not , particularly as we're speaking to scripture

20:38

right Is ? That's not the

20:40

freedom that we have in Christ

20:42

. You

20:44

know God's not a tyrant . So

20:48

forced submission , you know that's not the kind of submission

20:50

we're talking about , right , and I think that's a good that you brought

20:52

that up , because that's different

20:54

Right .

20:55

So to submit ? Is you choose to

20:57

submit yourself ?

20:59

Right , yeah , it is a choice and

21:01

I think , like another

21:03

piece of this , it also doesn't necessarily mean like

21:05

obedience in the sense of like , like

21:08

, sometimes submission can be accepting

21:11

the reality of a situation

21:13

of a structure of things

21:16

, particularly powers and things of that sort

21:18

, outside of your control . Yeah , there's just

21:20

certain things you can't control , that's true . Right no-transcript . Right and

21:22

you just have to submit to that fact , Like I have to submit

21:24

to the fact that you

21:28

know our government , you know , isn't

21:30

always matching my ideals

21:32

, yeah .

21:33

It's human beings leading human beings . It's imperfect

21:35

people leading imperfect people .

21:36

It's broken people leading a broken country

21:38

and you have to submit

21:40

to that reality if you're going to be effective to

21:43

the purposes of God and his kingdom right .

21:45

And even just to bring that down , if in a marriage

21:47

, like fundamentally speaking it's a broken

21:50

man trying to lead in a marriage

21:52

, it's a broken woman trying to lead . In a

21:54

marriage it's a broken man trying to submit , it's a

21:56

broken woman trying to submit , and so

21:58

that's never going to be done perfectly either , and

22:06

so you have to submit to that reality as well that your spouse isn't perfect and they're

22:09

not going to be perfect .

22:09

If you want to be good at submission , you have to accept the reality that the person you

22:11

married , the person you work for , your

22:14

government you know what I mean Whatever that

22:16

is you have to accept the fact

22:18

that they are broken people . They're

22:20

not perfect , so your marriage

22:22

is not going to be perfect . They're not going to be exactly

22:25

how you want them to be 100%

22:27

of the time . Yeah . Right Like , submission

22:29

requires that . And I would also

22:31

say , I think , another thing

22:33

people get confused

22:35

with this just because you

22:37

submit does not mean you agree . Submission

22:40

does not mean agreement . It actually

22:42

assumes the opposite . Right

22:44

Like , I don't have to submit . Like

22:47

if I got home from work today

22:50

and my wife was like hey , I

22:52

just bought you this three-day chartered fishing trip in

22:54

San Diego . Wow . Like , all

22:56

right , honey , I'm going to submit to you in this .

22:58

I'm going to go on my three-day chartered fishing trip .

23:01

Submit to accepting this trip . You know what I'm

23:03

saying ? That's not submission . You

23:05

submit to this gift . You submit to things you

23:07

disagree with . So , submission

23:09

actually assumes disagreement . So

23:12

just be clear , right ? If a

23:14

Christian principle is submission , then

23:17

that means that there's going to be things as

23:19

a believer you disagree with that you

23:22

have to submit to .

23:23

I mean Jesus literally says you have to pick up your cross

23:25

each day and die to yourself daily you

23:27

know , it's like , which assumes that your

23:29

flesh wants something . You want

23:31

something , but you have to be willing to submit

23:34

yourself to the things of God . And

23:37

so if you're willing to assume

23:40

, if you're you know of the kingdom and

23:42

you're saved , then you're willing to work

23:44

on submitting yourself to Christ . Why not also

23:46

work on submitting yourself to this life

23:48

partner that you know ?

23:50

Christ has blessed you with . This is what we're going to talk about , right , because

23:52

? So submission as a whole , right

23:54

, like I think some people think that if I submit

23:56

them , that's that's a admission

23:59

that I am wrong . Right

24:02

, like , if you and me are in a disagreement and I'm like , all

24:09

right , I'm just going to submit to Emran in this , that , like , that's

24:11

just a confirmation that , all right , emran , you were right , I was wrong . Right , that's not

24:13

true . Um , what biblical submission looks like is saying I

24:17

don't agree with you in this , but I will

24:19

submit to it , like with

24:21

you , knowing the fact that I disagree with

24:23

it , but I'm going to submit to you . Just , please be considerate

24:26

of me , which is what it's talking about here in terms

24:28

of marriage . Um , be

24:31

considerate of my perspective of this right

24:33

as I go into the submission

24:35

. But then not bringing it up after

24:37

submission is not saying

24:39

, all right , I'm like , particularly in marriage , right

24:41

, I'm not . Submission is not . I'm going to

24:43

submit to you in this decision . Then

24:45

you make that decision and then , months later

24:47

, you bring up the fact that you made this poor decision

24:50

. I didn't want to even do this , I didn't want to , and

24:52

you bring up that fight again , or that argument or

24:54

that debate again . It's like that's not submission

24:56

either . Right , like some , but that's

24:58

just you tabling the argument right

25:00

. That's not real submission either .

25:02

that's true and then but I mean the reverse of that

25:04

too if , um , if that submission

25:06

does take place , it would be tyrannical

25:08

for the , the , the

25:11

other party , to see themselves as the victor and

25:13

to lord over and it's like I knew I was

25:15

right .

25:15

You know , that's not what it means . You know , then

25:18

, them submitting to you doesn't mean that you're right . Them

25:20

submitting to you doesn't mean that they also think you're right

25:23

. Right , and I think people

25:25

I think particularly like married people need to

25:27

have this conversation to understand this right . Like

25:29

if selena

25:31

submits to you , that does not mean selena

25:33

agrees with you or you've changed

25:35

her mind yeah where she now . She thinks

25:37

you're right , right , it's

25:39

understanding that and almost

25:42

in the essence of that , that should turn your heart . She's

25:44

like man , like I know she doesn't agree with me and

25:46

she's submitting to me like that

25:49

. That should almost soften you a bit , to be like hey

25:52

, okay , hold on , let's talk about this a little

25:54

more than yeah , and what I mean , what that can lead to

25:56

if you're doing that well is effective

25:58

compromise , you know .

26:00

so it's like , okay , let's continue to work through this . Yes

26:02

, there's going to be some things where it's black or white . We

26:04

have to make a decision , but the vast

26:06

majority of things , there's a compromise

26:08

there somewhere , as long as you're willing

26:11

to be open and honest and have that conversation . But

26:13

just a lot of people don't . They stick

26:16

on their side and it's like it's my way or the highway

26:18

. But that's not effective communication

26:20

, that's not effective compromise . That's not submission

26:22

communication . That's not effective compromise

26:25

.

26:25

That's not submission , that's not building the marriage . You know , right , yeah , and submission

26:27

feels like a sacrifice because you truly think you're

26:29

right . So it was like party

26:31

A thinks they're right , party B thinks they're

26:33

right .

26:36

And yeah , the disagreement , right , um , it

26:39

assumes disagreement . Like you can't

26:41

, you just don't submit to things you agree with . You

26:44

know what I mean ? Like so , you just

26:46

have them I also think that that's very telling

26:49

, the fact that how often submission is mentioned

26:51

and is told of our expectation

26:53

to it . Um , that

26:57

we don't follow some fairytale

26:59

Bible . It's a very practical , real

27:01

Bible . It's very real about the fact that you're

27:03

going to have disputes . You're

27:05

going to have disagreements among

27:07

believers , within the church , in

27:10

your marriage , at your workplace

27:12

, with your kids , right , like you're going

27:14

to have disagreements . You need

27:16

to be good at submission if you want

27:18

to have a sustained witness

27:22

to the world . The

27:28

last thing I would also say is submission is not cowardice either . Um , kind

27:30

of like it assumes disagreement

27:33

. It also submission assumes

27:35

strength . It is . It

27:38

is not like it

27:40

. You could say in terms of , like proper English

27:42

, if

27:45

you get really angry at me , to where

27:47

you like , buck up and you're like , hey

27:49

, if we don't come to terms soon , we're

27:51

going to fight . Yeah , and I get really scared because

27:53

you're big and you go to the gym and I'm like , okay

27:55

, okay , okay , that's not really me

27:57

submitting , that's just me being

28:00

afraid .

28:00

It's just conceding , you're just conceding

28:02

that fight . Conceding .

28:03

Right , Um so . But

28:06

real submission looks like is you buck

28:09

up and I'm like , well , I could buck up too , Right

28:12

, and I could , I could throw a punch , or you know , we could do

28:14

this . You know what I mean , but then choosing not to right

28:16

, it takes strength . It

28:19

is meek meekness you have

28:21

. You cannot be meek if

28:23

you're weak , nor can you be submissive

28:25

if you're not meek Right

28:27

. So submission requires strength from

28:30

from both people . Yeah . A weak person

28:32

has a really hard time submitting because

28:35

they're just not in control of their emotions

28:37

, right . And they're

28:39

just following their , following

28:41

their emotions wherever it takes them . Yeah , following their

28:44

emotions wherever it takes them into , whatever decision , whatever words

28:46

, whatever actions they want to

28:48

do to , you know , improve themselves , right ? Submission

28:51

requires self-control . Submission requires

28:53

strength . Submission requires

28:55

, like all the fruit of the spirit

28:57

, to do that consistently well . That

28:59

doesn't mean something like I'm married

29:01

. I live in reality , right , like me

29:03

and my wife . There are times where our

29:06

worst fights is when one of the two of us it's

29:08

like that perfect storm where we're

29:10

both exhausted , where we're tired

29:13

, and then maybe

29:15

something else happened that we're just already emotionally

29:17

charged and it takes a

29:19

while for us both to

29:22

come to submission to one another . And

29:24

how that often leads is

29:26

sometimes a really bad argument that the

29:29

next day we're embarrassed . By then

29:31

we both come mutually submissive to each other . It's

29:33

like man , if we would have just started that way , none of

29:35

this would have happened . Yeah , right . So , like it's

29:38

, a lack of submission

29:41

is

29:43

often driven out of pride , right , it

29:45

requires humility to be submissive as well .

29:47

Oh , absolutely so all those it's like

29:49

the opposite of pride would be humility

29:51

, Right and you need humility

29:53

to be submissive .

29:55

So that's my point it takes a holistic

29:57

Christian life to

30:00

go to this Christian ideal of submission .

30:06

I brought it up , I think , a couple

30:08

of episodes ago , when we first had our marriage

30:10

counseling and his pastor

30:13

brought up Ephesians , which is kind of similar

30:15

to the submit yourselves . I

30:18

did not take that very well , even though I grew

30:20

up Christian , but it

30:22

rode me the wrong way .

30:24

We're going to talk about that

30:27

verse in Ephesians as well .

30:29

Yeah , I think it's worth the question and we can .

30:31

We can hold it for later , cause

30:33

it will come up .

30:35

Seven years later into marriage

30:37

.

30:37

But what I want to do is kind of now paint

30:39

. I guess this is more of the

30:42

key to this verse is more literary than

30:44

it is cultural . I mean there's some cultural

30:46

things loaded behind this , but we've

30:50

talked about this before , right , where often

30:55

when we read our Bibles we read it very Western

30:57

. So chapter three , we think

30:59

immediately , new thought , right

31:02

. So when chapter three starts off

31:04

with this verse , right

31:06

, wives , submit to your husband , we naturally

31:09

go . You assume that that's where it started . Okay

31:11

. So the main point , like we're on a new thought

31:13

, a new point , and this new thought a new point

31:15

is Peter teaching ? about marriage right

31:18

, but , as we've

31:20

talked about previous episodes , right , that's not

31:22

the case . These chapters and verses do not exist until

31:24

previous episodes . Right , that's not the case . These chapters and verses do not exist until medieval

31:26

. Europe right by a French monk when he decided

31:29

to do this , you know , based off his personal

31:31

opinion . So this was all written

31:33

together , right ? This was all clumped

31:35

together as a free flow of thought

31:38

.

31:38

Was this a letter as well ? Was Peter first Peter

31:40

a letter ?

31:40

This was a letter , yeah , To which 1

31:48

Peter a letter . This was a letter . Yeah , to which church ? So with that , I want you

31:51

to back up to chapter 2 , verse 13 , because this

31:53

whole text operates under

31:55

the umbrella . It is a child of this

31:57

larger parent verse of

31:59

what , the main point of what's actually being discussed

32:01

when he says this . Okay

32:03

, so I'm going to read this . This is uh . First

32:06

Peter , chapter two , verse 13 . I'm going to read

32:08

through 17 . Okay

32:10

, so this is . I

32:13

just want to say this is the primary point

32:15

. Okay , this is , this is the ideal

32:18

, this is what Peter is teaching on , this

32:21

is what he's trying to communicate to

32:23

his audience . This is it

32:25

. This is what the point they

32:27

needed to walk away with .

32:29

Okay , and so this is 13 through 17 . Yep

32:31

, all right . Submit yourselves

32:33

, for the Lord's sake , to every human

32:36

authority , whether to the emperor as

32:38

a supreme authority , or to governors

32:41

who are sent by him to punish those who

32:43

do wrong and to commend those who do right . For

32:46

it is God's will that , by doing

32:48

good , you should silence the

32:50

ignorant talk of foolish people . Live

32:53

as free people , but do not

32:55

use your freedom as a cover-up

32:57

for evil . Live as God's

33:00

slaves . Show proper respect

33:02

to everyone . Love the family of believers

33:05

. Fear God , honor the

33:07

emperor .

33:08

Now understand

33:11

honor the emperor . It's

33:13

no different than it is today

33:15

. That's no different

33:18

than saying hey , everybody , show

33:20

proper respect to everyone you meet

33:22

. That includes Democrats , that includes

33:24

Republicans , that mega Republicans

33:27

, everybody right . Show

33:29

respect to everyone , love

33:31

the church and the family of believers . Fear

33:34

God and honor Joe Biden

33:36

. Oh my gosh , yeah , you know

33:38

what I'm saying Honor the emperor . Now

33:40

some listeners may be like well , what's wrong with that ? And

33:43

there's a whole nother piece of

33:45

listeners are like see , that's a problem . Right , here's

33:48

the thing . Wherever you land there , what

33:51

was happening to these believers by the emperor

33:53

was they were being persecuted economically

33:55

pretty much everywhere Some

34:00

remnants of the Roman Empire . They

34:02

were being persecuted physically . They

34:06

were suffering , they were being thrown in prison . There was

34:08

a lot going on . Right , it was

34:10

a little bit . It wasn't like across

34:13

the entire empire . It was different everywhere you went , but

34:16

to them they're like they're

34:18

under the kingship of the emperor

34:20

. And what does he tell them ? Honor

34:22

the emperor . This is coming from the same Peter

34:25

, right ? If you remember um

34:27

, who he himself was

34:29

thrown in prison um , and was rescued

34:32

um , like all the way back in Jerusalem

34:34

, right ? Paul um

34:36

, beaten , stoned , thrown

34:38

in prison multiple times , who

34:41

was a Roman citizen , who had

34:43

incurred all that also under the Roman

34:45

emperor , Right , Like ? So the point is

34:47

, is that , like , wherever

34:50

you're at , I I highly doubt that

34:53

, as a Christian in America under Joe

34:55

Biden , you have experienced any of that because

34:57

of your faith Right , you may have gone to prison

35:00

under Joe Biden , but it's not because you were

35:02

a Christian right . It's probably because you did something bad Right

35:04

Um under Joe Biden .

35:04

But it's not because you were a Christian , right , it's probably because you

35:06

did something bad , right . Just for some reference to

35:09

, because I was reading kind of the opening in chapter one . So just

35:11

to reference , like who Peter's speaking to ? Chapter

35:15

one , verse one it says to God's elect exiles , scattered

35:18

throughout the provinces of Pontus

35:21

, galatia , cappadocia

35:23

, asia and Bithynia , who

35:26

have been chosen according to the foreknowledge of

35:28

God , the Father , through sanctifying work of

35:30

the Spirit , to be obedient to Jesus Christ

35:32

and sprinkled with his blood . So

35:35

it's like he's speaking to a pretty

35:37

broad audience even here .

35:39

All across multiple regions right . But

35:42

I think the primary point is this right In verse

35:44

13, . Right , this

35:46

is what he's teaching on Submit yourselves

35:49

for the Lord's sake , okay

35:51

. Yeah . Every one of us . Um

35:54

, for the Lord's sake , to every

35:57

human authority , whether

35:59

to the emperor as the Supreme authority

36:01

, or to governors or those

36:03

who are sent by him to punish those who do wrong and

36:06

commend those who do . Right . Now

36:08

, listen , for it is God's will that

36:10

by doing good , you should

36:12

silence the ignorant talk

36:14

of foolish people . And I want you

36:17

to see that

36:19

literary structure there , okay , because

36:21

it really follows kind of these three

36:23

things . Okay , there is a submissive

36:25

proclamation Okay , submit to , right

36:28

, you need to submit to . In

36:30

this particular case , submit

36:33

yourselves , for the Lord's sake

36:35

, right . Then the second thing is

36:37

that there's some sort of human authority

36:39

identified , okay

36:42

, to every human authority , which is , again

36:44

, this is the overarching point . And

36:46

then there's a mechanism by which

36:49

is given of how you

36:51

silence the

36:53

talk of ignorant and foolish people

36:55

, right , in

36:59

this particular case , it says by doing good , okay . So the whole point is submit yourselves

37:01

to Jesus to

37:03

every excuse me , submit yourselves

37:05

, for the sake of Christ , to

37:08

every human authority , for it is by

37:10

God's will that by you doing good , you

37:12

will silence ignorant talk and

37:14

the fools , right ? So then what he does

37:16

is from here he gives

37:19

a set of examples of what

37:21

that looks like . Okay , so

37:23

he's taken very specific situations to

37:25

these people of what was common then

37:27

to give them examples of this is what

37:29

that kind of submission looks like . The

37:32

first one he into the first example are

37:35

slaves submitting to their masters . So , verse 18

37:37

through 20 , excuse me , slaves

37:41

in reverent fear of God . Now notice

37:43

how he ended right . Show respect to everyone

37:45

. Love the family of believers . Fear God . Okay

37:47

, so , slaves in reverent fear of God

37:49

, submit yourselves to your masters

37:52

, not only to those who are good

37:54

and considerate , but also

37:56

those who are harsh . For it is

37:58

commendable if someone bears up under

38:00

the pain of unjust suffering , because

38:03

they are conscious of God . But how

38:05

is it ? To your credit if you receive a beating for doing

38:07

wrong and endure it ? But if you

38:09

suffer for doing good , right

38:11

, because how are we supposed to sound ignorant talk

38:14

by doing good ? So if you suffer

38:16

for doing good and you endure it , it is

38:18

commendable before God . So you see

38:20

, it's that same structure

38:22

, right ? There's a submissive

38:24

proclamation slaves in reverent fear of God

38:27

, submit yourselves to your masters

38:29

. Right , human authority identified

38:31

to your masters Mechanism for silencing

38:33

ignorant talk . For it is commendable if someone

38:35

bears up under the path or

38:37

the pain of unjust suffering , right

38:40

. So now he's saying and you're , and

38:42

you're suffering by

38:44

doing , if you are suffering , cause you were doing good like

38:47

that is commendable before God

38:49

and people see that right

38:51

, just like Christ on the cross . When

38:54

that thief looks over and says this man

38:56

has done nothing wrong , he is

38:58

submitting himself to

39:01

the pain of unjust suffering . That's what Christ did

39:03

right , which is exactly what the whole next

39:06

point is , which I'm going to . Before we get there , though

39:08

, we talked earlier

39:10

right Is that submission doesn't mean

39:12

agreement , right , submission doesn't mean agreement

39:14

, Right . So he just told Peter , just told slaves

39:17

that you're to submit to your masters , whether

39:19

they're good and considerate or they're harsh . Right

39:23

Paul in 1 Timothy

39:26

1 , I

39:28

think it's verse 10 , he states

39:30

slave masters

39:32

are one of the most abhorrent type of

39:34

sins . Anyone who has ever I hear

39:37

this a lot . Well , the Bible never condemns

39:39

slavery Like no it does . Yeah 1

39:41

Timothy 1.10 . Paul says

39:44

slave masters . It's listed in

39:46

one of the worst kind of sins . Okay

39:48

. So

39:52

Paul hates slavery . He hates the concept of it . It is

39:54

not of God , it is counter to

39:57

the grace of Christ . But then

39:59

in the book of Philemon , he

40:01

meets this runaway slave named

40:04

Onesimus . And what does he tell Onesimus to do

40:06

?

40:06

We did a whole episode .

40:09

Go back to your master . So this is an example

40:11

of Paul , in his leadership

40:13

, disagreeing with

40:15

the concept of slavery because he could have took his

40:17

righteous opinion , and you know no

40:21

, no , I'm against slavery . Let's

40:23

start at the Underground Railroad Right

40:25

. But why

40:28

do we submit what ? Does it go back to the main

40:30

point . Submit yourselves . For what , the

40:32

Lord's sake ? Yeah . Because

40:34

this is one thing Paul knew with Onesimus If

40:37

he would have not had Onesimus return

40:39

and kept him or let him escape

40:42

, right then

40:44

other Christians could be like so

40:47

we need to get the slaves freed . And

40:49

then what that would have done . Which slaves ? And

40:51

you know slaves are defined differently throughout history

40:53

. Right , there's indentured

40:55

servants or slaves . There's

40:59

those who were forcibly , right , put

41:01

into slavery . There's some who voluntarily

41:03

went into it and the conditions for

41:05

them , you know , were very

41:07

different throughout history , also

41:10

throughout different regions of areas . You know what I'm saying . You

41:13

know we always think of American history and antebellum

41:16

slavery , right , and

41:18

not that like one's worse than the other . Right , Because

41:20

it was abhorrent then . But

41:22

the point being was that he

41:25

did not agree with it . But slaves

41:28

made up 25% of the Roman economy

41:30

, Of the labor force . So if

41:32

the Christian movement had , at that particular

41:34

time , became known to be

41:37

a movement of freeing

41:39

slaves , then they would

41:41

have looked at as

41:44

the way right Followers of Christ

41:46

, as those who are trying to crush Rome

41:48

. Right , they would

41:50

not have been attractive

41:53

to the gospel . Yeah Right , so the one thing

41:55

more important than Onesimus' man

41:58

, that's a word , Onesimus' . Actions

42:01

, Freedom . So

42:03

one thing more important than Onesimus' freedom

42:05

and the

42:07

righteous position of Paul . The

42:09

one thing that was superior to that was

42:12

the gospel . I see . Therefore

42:14

, paul , onesimus , submit

42:16

yourself for the sake of Christ

42:19

. Does that make sense ?

42:21

Yeah , Something I was thinking about

42:23

while you're mentioning that was

42:25

one the writings that came

42:27

out of some of the Jews

42:30

that were in

42:32

the internment camps during

42:35

the Holocaust , and some

42:38

of the strongest writings that come out of there is

42:40

those that found peace and

42:43

tried to do good even while in that abhorrent

42:46

condition , that

42:48

impossible situation to predict

42:50

or even plan for , but they

42:52

still were able to find

42:54

a peace in it , and it was by taking care of

42:56

those around them , by submitting to the authority that

42:58

was there and and continuing

43:01

to represent you know

43:03

God in that environment

43:05

. And then the thing that popped in

43:07

my head after that was actually the books that

43:10

the power of a praying wife and

43:12

the power of a praying husband , books that

43:14

that Selena's , selena's read through Power of a

43:16

Praying Wife . I've got Power of a Praying Husband on my desk

43:18

. The way it was written I didn't

43:20

get as into it , but I do remember . The points

43:23

that were brought up in there is

43:25

that the book really talks about how

43:28

, if you're trying to

43:30

change your spouse , then

43:33

look to , through prayer and petition

43:36

, work on yourself

43:38

and pray for your spouse , and

43:40

it talks a lot about that submission process

43:43

, that combat

43:45

is not how you change your spouse .

43:47

That is the whole point of what Peter makes here . When we get to

43:49

the wives , submit to husbands piece . So

43:51

hold on to that .

43:52

Okay .

43:53

Because that's his point . But

43:56

we'll get there in due time , right ? So ? Example

43:58

one , right Main point submit yourselves for the Lord's

44:00

sake to every human authority

44:03

. Right so that by

44:05

doing good you should silence ignorant

44:07

and talk of foolish people , right ? First

44:10

example he gives hey , slaves , here's an

44:12

example . Submit yourself to

44:15

your masters . The second example he

44:17

gives is the example of Christ

44:19

and his own submission , in verse 21 through 25

44:21

. He

44:30

says he committed no sin

44:32

. Most deceit was found

44:34

in his mouth when they hurled

44:36

their insults at him . He did not

44:38

retaliate when he suffered . He

44:41

made no threats . Instead he

44:43

entrusted himself to him

44:45

. Who judges justly ? He

44:48

himself bore our sins in his body

44:50

on the cross so that we might

44:52

die to sin and live for righteousness

44:54

. By his wounds you have

44:56

been healed , for you were like

44:59

sheep going astray , but now you have returned

45:01

to the shepherd and the overseer of

45:03

your souls . So that's an encouraging

45:05

word to a slave who is saying like

45:08

go back to your harsh master , submit to

45:10

your harsh master . He says remember Christ on the

45:12

cross . He submitted to

45:14

the cross unjustly , just

45:16

like you . But what you need to work

45:18

on is following his footsteps . You're

45:20

going to suffer , you know . You may

45:23

suffer like Christ did , but it was unjust

45:25

because he did good . So go be like Christ

45:27

. Do good in your situation , no matter

45:30

the injustice of it . Submit

45:32

to the reality that surrounds it . Right

45:35

, you need to submit to the reality of your situation

45:37

and do good within it . By

45:40

submitting to your master , you're also submitting

45:42

to that reality , right

45:45

? Does that mean that we live a defeatist life

45:47

? Like , well , this is just my life , like I guess

45:49

I'm just going to live this , like that's not what he's saying

45:51

. What he is saying is that it

45:54

is for Christ's sake that you submit

45:56

. I keep saying that over and over because

45:58

that's the main point and it leads us into our text here

46:00

in a second where I think it's going to make a little

46:02

more sense within marriage context

46:04

. I do want to note that do you have

46:06

a ?

46:07

point that it's

46:09

a very real thing from like a military

46:11

strategy perspective , to

46:14

just you have to accept where you are in

46:17

order to move forward . You know , if

46:19

you're fighting the reality of the state that

46:21

you're in , then you're never going to actually

46:23

be solving the problem that you need to solve . So

46:26

, um , I , I , I think that to

46:29

to kind of clarify your , your

46:31

point what is the term ?

46:33

embrace the suck right .

46:34

Yeah , Embrace the suck right , Like in order to just got to embrace

46:36

it in order to improve your position , in

46:39

order to uh make your position

46:41

more tenable , more resilient , more defensible , you

46:43

have to accept that your position sucks

46:45

and you have to choose and have the will to like

46:47

but

46:49

I'm going to continue to work to improve

46:52

it like a battalion defense training event . Oh

46:54

love those , so go out Just sitting there all day Dig

46:56

the trenches .

46:57

Dig the foxholes and it just starts

46:59

pouring rain Right , and this is winter . So

47:01

like for those

47:03

who aren't from around here . The

47:05

desert means dry . It doesn't mean warm

47:07

all the time , like it's warm in the summer , obviously

47:09

it's hot , but it is freezing , cold

47:11

, but it is really cold and dry in the winter

47:13

, and so we're wet , we're

47:16

freezing , and this was the whole training

47:18

. Like we were supposed to be out there for three days just in

47:20

the defense , practicing defensive

47:22

operations . Like there's nobody coming to attack us , like

47:24

it wasn't force on force or nothing , like we're

47:26

just literally in foxholes , water

47:29

up to our knees , freezing , and

47:31

it's just one of those like embrace the

47:33

suck . What you need to do is just accept the reality

47:36

that it is raining , that it is

47:38

cold , and this is where you are and there's nothing

47:40

that's going to change that . Embrace

47:42

it . So , now go be good

47:45

within that situation .

47:47

Because if you didn't embrace or

47:50

accept the reality of your situation , let's say

47:52

you fought it , or you went internal , or you stopped .

47:54

It's when you become miserable .

48:01

It's not just when you become miserable , it's actually where you're now the most vulnerable

48:04

, right like it's , let's say this was a real fight and you're in the foxhole and you're it's raining

48:06

down on you , but you still have to man that

48:08

gun because if you , you know

48:10

, start wallowing and you're not paying attention , you're not attentive

48:12

, down the the line , now

48:15

you're ripe for exploit , you know . So

48:17

if you're , let's look in our Christian life . If

48:19

you're not willing to accept the

48:22

reality of your situation and

48:24

then start making intelligent decisions to improve

48:26

that position based off of that reality

48:29

that you're in , then you're leaving yourself open

48:31

to be exploited by those around you . All

48:34

right , they're going to break through those now weakened

48:36

defenses because you haven't accepted

48:38

, you haven't embraced the suck and started making better decisions

48:40

.

48:41

The whole idea , though . I mean , like

48:45

you were saying , somebody going internal , which you

48:47

see a lot you also see it . When I was up in

48:49

Bridgeport right On top of that mountain

48:51

when it's freezing .

48:52

That's where

48:55

the Mountain Warfare Training Center . Where the Mountain Warfare Training

48:57

Center is , we're

48:59

training for .

48:59

Mountain Warfare for the Rain Corps . You

49:03

get so bad that you see some guys start drinking JP8

49:06

fuel just so they can get off the mountain . It's

49:10

a real thing . Coming

49:12

forward , they actually put

49:17

guards on the generators

49:19

to keep people from drinking

49:22

the fuel , so they go internal . But

49:24

the idea of going internal is really again

49:26

that that's just your

49:29

inability to submit to your situation

49:31

.

49:31

Yeah , and make better decisions . Your refusal

49:33

to submit leads you to inability to cope , yeah , so because , your refusal

49:36

to submit your refusal to submit

49:38

we do to inability to cope .

49:39

Yeah . And an inability to cope leads

49:41

to a lot of other problems .

49:42

Yeah , Because you start fighting the condition

49:45

when the condition conditions outside of your control

49:47

, and so you start doing more and more extreme

49:49

things to try and fight the condition , like

49:51

drinking fuel , right , you know ? So what

49:53

he ?

49:53

says isn't orharm . Submit

49:56

for the Lord's sake , so that you , by

49:58

doing good , you can now silence ignorant

50:00

talk right ? Yeah . Just accept it

50:02

Now . go do your best in that situation right

50:04

Make better decisions as a believer , as a man as

50:06

a woman , you know , go forward

50:09

. So

50:13

that was , as an example

50:15

gives us Christ's submission on the cross

50:17

. And then now we get to the third example , which

50:19

is now wives , submit to your husbands

50:21

. Okay . So , first , one through seven . I'm going

50:23

to read it again Now . It says , likewise

50:26

wives be subject to your own

50:28

husbands . That even if some

50:30

do not obey the word , they may

50:32

be one without a word by the conduct

50:34

of their wives . Okay . So

50:36

notice what of their wives , okay ? So notice

50:39

what it said there . Okay , wives

50:45

, submit to your own husbands , so that , even if some do not obey the word , who are not believers

50:47

, they may be one without a word , but by the conduct

50:49

of their wife . Right ? So

50:52

go back up to the main point , right

50:54

. Submit yourselves , for the

50:56

Lord's sake , to every human

50:58

authority , whether the emperor , supreme authority

51:01

, to governors , for it is God's

51:03

will that , by doing good , you should silence

51:05

the ignorant talk of foolish people . So

51:08

, live as free people , but

51:10

do not use your freedom as a cover-up

51:13

for evil . Live as

51:15

God's slaves . Your freedom as a cover-up

51:17

for evil . Live as God's slaves . So

51:23

, in other words , the problem he's addressing specifically with this is that there was a lot of women

51:25

who were becoming saved , but their husbands weren't . Now

51:29

, that's a problem in every marriage

51:33

where that dynamic is true

51:35

, where one

51:37

is a believer , one is not , I mean you

51:39

don't think about how often you

51:42

have to go back to common ground

51:44

in a marriage and

51:47

a family to build up from Raising

51:49

kids . How do I discipline the kids ? How do we

51:52

raise you know what I'm saying , absolutely kids

51:55

? How do we ? You know what I'm saying Absolutely ? The confusion that creates

51:58

a child when , well , mom's , you know mom is telling me that

52:00

Jesus is the most important thing in life

52:02

and then dad doesn't give

52:04

him a single thought in the day .

52:06

He's still at home in his pajamas watching football

52:08

while I'm here , he thinks the Steelers

52:10

are the best .

52:11

Right . So how is ? How

52:14

? Is this the most important thing ? And if it is the most

52:16

important thing , then why doesn't dad care ? And

52:19

if this is true , then why aren't we doing more

52:21

for dad and dad ? Why don't you come to church ? Now he gets

52:23

angry because he doesn't believe in it , but now he thinks

52:25

his kid hates him , or the kid goes

52:27

like I'm gonna be like dad and you can't tell me otherwise

52:29

, because dad does it right it creates so much problems

52:32

and when you're unequally yoked

52:34

in that way , right and so this

52:36

is a very real thing

52:38

, right ? Yeah , even worse within

52:40

this context is that in those days

52:43

, like it was accepted that your wife

52:45

took on the religion of your husband in

53:02

the Roman Pantheon . And let's say , you were a foreigner from Gaul or Spain or maybe

53:04

Greece and you served different gods Egypt

53:06

, persia , whatever . You had your own family , gods or

53:08

faith you two got married

53:11

. You would accept his gods

53:13

. That's how it worked . That was what was expected

53:16

, right ? So now

53:18

you find Jesus and you

53:21

say , hey , I believe there's only one God . I

53:23

believe Christ died for me . I don't

53:26

think I need your Pantheon . Not

53:28

just I don't think , I know , I don't need your Pantheon

53:30

. What does Imran

53:32

now do ? Right ? So you see how that creates

53:34

this strife , right ? So he's

53:37

going to , and also the family's probably not going to do

53:39

. Well , right , and the whole point

53:41

is saying so . You need to submit

53:43

to your husbands when they're angry about that . Yeah

53:46

Right , this is going to create issues

53:48

, but you win him over not by fighting

53:50

, but in your submission that

53:53

you can win them over , that

53:56

they may be won without a word

53:58

, but by the simple conduct of yourself . Submission

54:01

is supposed to be one

54:03

of the primary identifiers of a believer

54:06

that we submit in a

54:08

way that creates peace and joy

54:10

, that maintains unity that is full of

54:12

grace , right and joy that maintains unity that

54:14

is full of grace , right . Contentious

54:17

believers is

54:19

not a good look . That

54:22

doesn't mean there are not times that you have to stand

54:24

your ground . You plant your flag and you say , nope , I'm

54:26

sorry , there's only one God Christ is

54:29

the only way .

54:30

Yeah , you have to still be clear and concise about what you

54:32

believe . You don't submit away

54:34

from your faith .

54:36

Submission is not the same thing as compromise . Yeah , exactly

54:38

, you're not expected to compromise , but submission

54:42

in the sense that he's

54:44

not going to handle this well . But

54:46

remember , submit

54:48

yourselves , for what the

54:50

Lord's sake ? Right

54:53

, so that he may be won over

54:55

, right back to chapter

54:57

3 , that he may be won without a word

54:59

, but by the conduct of your wife or their wives

55:02

. By doing that good , mm-hmm . Right

55:04

, by doing good , we silence ignorant

55:06

talk , even if that's your own husband . Yeah

55:08

, right . Verse 2

55:11

, when they see your respectful

55:13

and pure conduct , do

55:15

not let your adorning be

55:17

excuse me , I'm sorry , there may

55:20

be one without a word , but by the conduct of

55:22

their wives , when they see your respectful and pure conduct

55:24

. Verse 3 . Do not

55:26

let your adorning be external , the

55:29

braiding of the hair and the putting on of gold jewelry

55:31

or the clothing you wear . Now

55:34

I just want to kind of pause there , right ? Because

55:47

as much as you can

55:49

apply this towards marriage , right

55:51

? Which is this is , I think , specifically talking

55:54

about a certain kind of marriage . One

55:56

of the elements that we do draw out of

55:58

this is God's heart for women , right

56:01

? Notice what he says . Women

56:03

and Selena , I'd really

56:06

love your perspective on this , but

56:10

I've

56:13

been reading this book . It's called Captivating

56:15

. I've

56:18

been reading this book . It's called Captivating . It's by so , this man , john Eldridge . He

56:20

wrote this book called Fathered by God and Wild at Heart , and

56:24

his wife wrote a book called

56:26

Captivated

56:28

. And I'm reading

56:30

it because I really would like to understand , as a man

56:33

, how to better lead

56:35

and disciple my wife and understand her , how

56:37

to better raise my daughter , how

56:40

to disciple the females and youth

56:42

. So I'm reading

56:44

this and one of the things that

56:47

a lot of good things in there but one of the things

56:49

that their premise is is that women

56:51

, part of their creation , as

56:54

they were created , was to

56:56

unveil beauty , and

56:58

you see this within women , this obsession

57:00

almost with beauty . Right , like

57:05

there's a reason that they spend hours getting ready in the morning

57:07

. I mean , imran , you don't

57:09

even have hair . You don't even have the pressure of hair .

57:11

You can be up and ready in minutes . I'm not bald

57:14

.

57:15

It was inconvenient . Like

57:18

I have a full head of hair . I was like man , twenty dollars

57:20

a week , like that's inconvenient whoop

57:22

gone . Like , like , my

57:24

wife , like on a sunday morning is , uh

57:27

, you know , far

57:29

before I am getting ready for church . I'm

57:31

up , take my shower , I'm ready , ready

57:34

to go out the door , and she's still like you

57:37

know doing her thing . And I'm like you're not even dressed , like

57:39

we got to go right , Like we're always late

57:41

, you know , and she's always the reason because

57:43

she's always .

57:45

Wow , put in your boss . I love her , for everyone

57:48

to know .

57:49

No , no , no , no , no , no , no , Because I see you . Anybody

57:51

who knows the . Brown family , and

57:53

my wife knows this to be true . This

57:56

is not a secret . It's

57:58

a , but you know , women have that , and

58:01

there's also this , that element of women

58:03

like . I know it's kind of

58:05

a stereotype , but like , like

58:07

women don't like if , if

58:10

a man and a woman are walking down and a woman's walking

58:12

, she's not looking at the man , she's looking at the woman . She's

58:15

saying how beautiful is she , How's she dressed , how is she ? You

58:17

know what I mean . They're always like comparing themselves , because

58:19

women were part of their . Their created

58:22

being was to unveil beauty . Like that is a

58:25

central element of who they are and

58:27

the function of creation , which is true

58:29

in the sense , because they were the crown of creation . I have a question

58:31

, though Would , then , of creation ?

58:32

Um , I have a question , though . Would would then maybe something

58:35

of the fall be the uh

58:37

, their lack of faith in their

58:39

own , in the beauty they've unveiled by just being

58:41

? Maybe it's like why , why

58:43

they feel compelled to compare themselves and all

58:45

that is like .

58:46

Maybe that's part of I think it's me and

58:48

my wife were actually talking about this was um , she

58:51

picked up on the fact that she was very impulsive

58:53

and that she wasn't satisfied , that women

58:56

can tend to get very like

58:58

I'm not satisfied with what I have , I'm impulsive

59:00

of something else that I don't have , and

59:04

that she went for it . I

59:12

mean , there's a couple of failures there in terms of her and her

59:14

purpose and identity , but also Adam . One

59:17

of the supreme failures of Adam was that he was passive , like men are created to be aggressive

59:19

. Right , the right way , not

59:21

in the toxic way . But yeah , we

59:23

are to be aggressive , like if

59:26

a serial killer breaks down the door . Right

59:29

, like you don't want a

59:32

passive man standing between you and that serial

59:34

killer right or a cockroach . Me

59:44

as a man is like I'm not going to be passive in a situation like that . If I die , I'm

59:46

not dying a weak , pathetic man . You're going to have to plug me full

59:48

of about 40 holes before I go down , and by that time my family

59:50

should at least have enough time to escape , right ? So

59:52

there's times for men to be physically aggressive

59:55

, but more so aggressive

59:57

towards sin , aggressive towards I'm

59:59

seeing danger in my family . I'm being

1:00:01

aggressive . I'm not going to wait for that

1:00:03

to grow . I'm going to attack that

1:00:05

immediately get that out of my house .

1:00:07

Kill culture problems , Aggressive aggressive , aggressive

1:00:10

.

1:00:10

The Supreme , what

1:00:12

made Israel unfaithful from the

1:00:14

time of Joshua , through the judges

1:00:16

, through you know , to David , um , that

1:00:19

entire time , like well , yeah , they

1:00:21

were unfaithful . What were they unfaithful in ? God

1:00:23

told them , told the men you

1:00:25

need to go fight . I told you to

1:00:27

go fight . They were passive . Yeah

1:00:29

. Right . So what you see with Adam

1:00:32

is similarly . He was passive

1:00:34

and seeing the danger of

1:00:36

his purpose and the danger to his wife

1:00:38

. He was a passive man , and so

1:00:41

you see that failure right , and you do see that with

1:00:43

Eve too , I think . but I guess I don't want

1:00:45

to get too off track on that , because my thing was is that when

1:00:52

you , when you go through like creation week , like

1:00:54

we always talk about mankind is like when you go through creation

1:00:56

week , we always talk about mankind , is like we're the epoch , we're the climax

1:00:58

of creation , male and female . Then

1:01:01

he creates man , specifically masculine

1:01:03

man and

1:01:07

you can almost say that we are the capstone , we're

1:01:09

the final piece on top

1:01:11

. But then that's not the last thing . God doesn't

1:01:13

stop there . He puts Adam into

1:01:15

his purpose . So Adam

1:01:18

has a standing relationship

1:01:20

, he's walking with God , he's living in the purpose God

1:01:22

gave him , in the place God gave him . There

1:01:25

hadn't been the fall yet . They're

1:01:27

good , right . But

1:01:29

then God still says it's not good for you to be alone , right

1:01:33

. So

1:01:37

even walking with God and living in that purpose and doing that , he says it is not good for you to

1:01:39

be here alone . So then what he does is he then takes and creates Eve out

1:01:41

of his character as well . Right , and he says

1:01:43

you need the feminine part of this Right

1:01:45

. So if men are the capstone

1:01:48

of creation , women are the crown , and

1:01:50

the whole idea , um , and even

1:01:52

within Jewish thought , was that women were the crown

1:01:55

. They were the crowns of their husband , the

1:01:57

idea being- .

1:01:59

You had to go out and pay a lot to

1:02:01

earn the right- . Oh yeah , they were expensive . Yeah , the dowry To earn

1:02:03

the right to marry . Well , they're still expensive but like- .

1:02:06

They're expensive because the concept is easy .

1:02:08

The process of going out , because we had the episode

1:02:10

on marriage and that process to

1:02:13

go out , and you literally

1:02:15

present an offer to her father , like

1:02:18

to of sheep , cow

1:02:20

land , like whatever you have to

1:02:22

hopefully earn the opportunity

1:02:25

to marry , right , you know ? I

1:02:27

mean , we still have that with like engagement ring no

1:02:30

, I mean like , but I don't have to go to your family and

1:02:32

say , well , I have all , have this

1:02:34

home , this job , and then convince

1:02:36

your family to give me permission . You

1:02:39

know , I did have that conversation with her family

1:02:41

.

1:02:41

I was going to say kind of .

1:02:44

But it's like , but plenty of people don't do that . They

1:02:46

just , you know , let's get hitched . You

1:02:48

know that culture is there .

1:02:50

But the idea , though within , even like Jewish , thought

1:02:52

, right was that , sorry , I keep distracting

1:02:54

from the question . What

1:03:02

was the question ? Men are the foundation , in a sense of like we're

1:03:04

, we're the solid ground .

1:03:05

Women are the crown . Their wives are what make it beautiful .

1:03:06

Yeah , um , without a woman , a man is just an

1:03:08

ugly , stable rock , right , and so

1:03:11

so kind of understanding in terms of like , how the way

1:03:13

they always viewed that in terms of creation . But woman

1:03:15

was the last thing , the last creative

1:03:18

act God made . He said all

1:03:20

has been built , but it's not good for

1:03:23

you to be by yourself . Let me put your crown

1:03:25

on you and he gives them his wife . So

1:03:27

, like women were supposed to be the

1:03:29

adorning of their husband , Do you think the

1:03:31

garden was not beautiful without Adam

1:03:34

?

1:03:35

I think everything was named .

1:03:36

I mean without Eve .

1:03:37

Everything was named and probably very organized .

1:03:39

I don't think life was beautiful without

1:03:41

Eve . I think there

1:03:44

is a longing

1:03:46

and a seeking that

1:03:48

wasn't being filled within

1:03:51

Adam at that time . That's why God says it's not good for you

1:03:53

to be alone . I'm preaching on this actually in June

1:03:55

, when I'm preaching on shepherding your youth

1:03:57

, um , and we're going to talk about a little

1:03:59

more about the Hebrew . That's behind

1:04:01

this , but that's like a whole nother episode of

1:04:03

this .

1:04:04

Okay .

1:04:04

But what's the question ? What's the question ? Well , I was just going to ask

1:04:06

you , like , in terms of the beauty

1:04:08

, right , like , would you agree with that

1:04:10

statement that women

1:04:13

kind of get obsessive with it more so than

1:04:15

men ?

1:04:15

I agree .

1:04:18

Do you feel like it's a longing within you that , like you always feel

1:04:20

like you have to prove your beauty or have to unveil

1:04:23

beauty wherever you go ?

1:04:25

Not really . I actually appreciate

1:04:27

the simplicity . We

1:04:32

had this conversation on Saturday with the men's breakfast . I'm like , wow , I love that

1:04:34

the men just get together and

1:04:36

bring food and fellowship . That's

1:04:38

amazing and and

1:04:40

for me I feel like women's

1:04:43

ministry it makes it really complicated

1:04:45

where you have to get there and

1:04:47

make the entire

1:04:49

decorations , the decorations , the crafts like

1:04:52

you have to make the breakfast beautiful . This is my point , that's

1:04:54

my point he's beautiful . This is my point , that's my point

1:04:57

.

1:04:57

Yeah , that's making

1:04:59

my point , do you agree ?

1:05:00

with the premise that women

1:05:02

are . I see that beauty . Yeah , there's

1:05:04

a thing that they say as a woman when

1:05:06

you guys plan this is what I heard .

1:05:08

I heard it bothers you . You guys are kind of a weird

1:05:10

couple though we are , we're opposites yeah

1:05:13

, you are Generally speaking , though most women

1:05:15

don't let men plan the wedding .

1:05:17

I didn't want a wedding .

1:05:18

She didn't even want a wedding .

1:05:19

I know , I know we had this , I'm saying you guys are weird , but most

1:05:21

my wife did not let me .

1:05:24

She's like you can go carry

1:05:26

the heavy things right , because

1:05:28

women want to unveil that beauty .

1:05:30

There's a thing about when I would plan the wrong

1:05:32

person to ask yeah , do you remember ? Like

1:05:35

even .

1:05:35

Tuesday when we , uh , tuesday night Bible study , we

1:05:37

had a , uh , we did one of those fellowship

1:05:39

potluck nights and like there

1:05:42

was just a few women in the church that , like Amy Biggles

1:05:44

came up and she was , um , you know my wife

1:05:46

. And then there was , there was just a Trissa , there

1:05:48

was a few of them . They're like so Valentine's

1:05:51

day we said , instead of doing the Bible study , we're just going to have like

1:05:53

a little Valentine's potluck for everybody

1:05:55

, because we already have child care and all that . And they're

1:05:57

like well , are you ? You have

1:05:59

decorations . And I was like no

1:06:02

decorations , no . Like

1:06:04

I was like I got a table and like there's just

1:06:06

like this white

1:06:08

table out , like that's where they could put their stuff

1:06:10

and we can eat . And she's like I

1:06:12

thought so and she came with this bag nice

1:06:14

, she came with this bag .

1:06:15

Nice , she came prepared , understanding .

1:06:17

She's like man . Step aside , let

1:06:19

the woman unveil the beauty . Right , and she made it beautiful

1:06:21

and it looked great right .

1:06:24

I will say as one who sees all

1:06:26

the pictures from the women's events and the men's events

1:06:28

, because we do a lot of social media stuff . The

1:06:31

women's events are beautiful

1:06:33

. They are , they are , and

1:06:35

a lot of it is also teaching beautiful

1:06:38

things as well . It's

1:06:43

like the older generation is passing on this unique skill about some aspect of making something beautiful

1:06:45

to the next generation

1:06:47

of women , and I think that that's awesome as well , unveiling beauty

1:06:49

to the world and unveiling beauty

1:06:52

Compared to the men's event , where we literally went shooting

1:06:54

just took all our guns and went out to a random place and just shot . Compared to the men's event

1:06:56

, where we literally went shooting Right , just took all our guns , just went shooting and went out to a random place and just shot . And

1:06:58

then the other major event we did are the potlucks

1:07:00

, where we just Eat food . Put tables outside

1:07:02

Barbecue Eat food . Show up , eat the food . It

1:07:04

was before your time .

1:07:05

We used to have axe throwing stations out there

1:07:10

. Wow , it doesn't matter that

1:07:12

got secured . But

1:07:18

it was a great men's event . But

1:07:24

the point being , though , is that , generally speaking , like her , premise is that women want to unveil beauty

1:07:26

, and I think what's interesting here watch what it says . Do

1:07:28

not let your adorning so

1:07:30

you women as the crowns right

1:07:33

. Do not let your adorning

1:07:35

your crowns be external the

1:07:37

braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry or

1:07:39

the clothes you wear right . Don't make this

1:07:41

materialistic . Don't make it about

1:07:44

your fashion . Don't make it about that's

1:07:46

not what the real crown in

1:07:48

your value and worth is . What

1:07:50

does he say ? But let your adorning

1:07:52

your crown be the hidden person of the heart

1:07:54

, with the imperishable beauty

1:07:57

of a gentle and quiet

1:07:59

spirit which is , in God's sight , very precious

1:08:02

. For this is how

1:08:04

the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn

1:08:06

themselves by submitting

1:08:08

to their own husbands , as

1:08:12

Sarah obeyed Abraham , calling him Lord

1:08:14

, and you are her children , and

1:08:16

if you do good and do not fear anything

1:08:19

, that is frightening . In

1:08:22

other words , you have to understand . For

1:08:25

Sarah to call Abraham Lord

1:08:27

, right , everyone's like oh , so I have to call my husband

1:08:29

Lord , like . That's not what he is saying . What

1:08:32

he is saying is that Abraham was

1:08:34

given a promise by God , and she

1:08:37

said I'm too old , so you better just

1:08:39

go take my servant , go sleep with her , go fulfill

1:08:42

God's promise to you through

1:08:44

this young servant of mine , cause

1:08:46

, god , I have no place in God's promise

1:08:49

. And Abraham , like an idiot , instead

1:08:51

of reaffirming his wife in

1:08:53

the same promise as him , says okay

1:08:56

and goes and does it , yeah , right

1:08:58

, um , then of course that's Ishmael

1:09:00

, and then of course she freaks out . We've talked about this

1:09:02

before . Right , sends the boy and Hagar

1:09:05

away and you have the first single mother in the Bible

1:09:07

, first single mother in the Bible . And you keep so

1:09:09

understanding like Abraham

1:09:11

was called righteous cause he walked by faith , but he was also

1:09:13

an idiot , and Sarah

1:09:16

called him Lord . She knew

1:09:19

he was an idiot , right , even

1:09:27

when it takes him up to sacrifice him on a mountain , she's like that's my Lord

1:09:29

, that donkey up there . You know what I mean , the idea being

1:09:31

is that what made her beautiful

1:09:33

? Because Sarah had a lot of failures in that too ? Is that

1:09:36

what made her beautiful ? Because Sarah had

1:09:38

a lot of failures in that too ? But

1:09:40

for her , is that she , by calling Abraham Lord , was the idea that she submitted to

1:09:42

him and things because she disagreed with him . You

1:09:45

see what I'm saying Like we missed the point

1:09:47

. We

1:09:49

missed the point . So

1:09:52

if you do good and do not fear anything

1:09:54

, though that is frightening . But then it says this likewise

1:09:56

, husbands , we always have to stop

1:09:58

at verse six Husbands

1:10:01

, live with your wives in

1:10:03

an understanding way , showing

1:10:05

honor to the woman as the

1:10:07

weaker vessel , since they are heirs

1:10:09

with you of the grace of life

1:10:11

, so that your prayers may not be hindered

1:10:14

. So again , this is one of those right

1:10:16

Like our target text here , even when

1:10:18

it seems to go to the men , it seems to be very , almost

1:10:20

derogatory towards women . You

1:10:22

know like you need to be considerate of those

1:10:25

weaker vessels , right ? That

1:10:27

is not it . And this is one of , I think , the things that

1:10:29

is very heartbreaking about this verse

1:10:31

, because that verse is also supposed

1:10:34

to be very uplifting of women and

1:10:36

it's been changed . People get

1:10:38

offended by it , people don't like talking about it , they

1:10:40

don't want to even study it because I think they're afraid

1:10:42

of what it means . This is meant

1:10:44

to be very uplifting of women

1:10:47

. So let me break it down Husbands

1:10:50

, live with your wives in an

1:10:52

understanding way , showing

1:10:55

honor to her . So

1:10:57

you are to live as if , try

1:11:00

to understand her to the best of your ability Be

1:11:02

considerate , showing her

1:11:04

honor , you are to honor her . It

1:11:06

is not very honoring to your wife if

1:11:09

, particularly in public , you

1:11:11

just the way you treat her is dismissive

1:11:14

. Woman , stand behind me . Hey

1:11:17

, stop speaking . Stop speaking . Right Men

1:11:19

are talking . Oh there's the cars . Oh , randy , right

1:11:21

, like that is honor

1:11:23

your wife . Yeah , ele . Oh there's cigars . Oh , randy right . Like honor your wife .

1:11:25

Yeah , elevate her Honor Christ .

1:11:27

How do we honor Christ ? How do we honor what does honor

1:11:29

mean ? Exactly what you said Elevate

1:11:32

Right . Look , boys

1:11:34

, if you don't like my wife speaking

1:11:36

at this dinner table , we're both out . Yeah

1:11:39

Right , we're done . Support

1:11:42

empower . You

1:11:45

know what I'm right , we're done , support , empower . You know I'm saying like that

1:11:47

. You honor her among everybody else , honor her with your friends within , at work , um , and

1:11:49

whatever you're doing , you honor your wife .

1:11:51

Yeah um , one of the things that really

1:11:54

for the how right

1:11:56

it really you have to know

1:11:58

, right . So you need to know your wife

1:12:00

in order to be able to effectively honor her

1:12:02

. If you don't know what her dreams , her aspirations

1:12:04

, her goals , her desires are , how are

1:12:06

you going to be able to elevate her in those

1:12:08

things you know , how are you going to be able

1:12:10

to support her in those things ? So , uh

1:12:13

, like , first off , if you're , if

1:12:15

, if you're , if you think

1:12:17

your dreams and your wife's dreams are the same dreams

1:12:19

, then you haven't communicated effectively

1:12:22

, you know , with your wife . So

1:12:24

first you need to listen and ask

1:12:26

those questions so that you can actually

1:12:28

do these things of elevating

1:12:30

her and honoring her , you

1:12:33

know .

1:12:33

So I , yeah , and but

1:12:36

, but this is the piece that gets people right , so

1:12:38

we were to honor her . She'll honor to the woman

1:12:41

as the weaker vessel

1:12:43

. Okay , weaker vessel

1:12:45

, um , let's

1:12:48

just kind of break that down , okay , um

1:12:50

, first , weaker . When

1:12:52

we think of weak , we always , you know

1:12:54

, weak like um

1:12:57

. What do we mean by weak ? The

1:13:00

adjective there

1:13:02

for weaker is more , in the sense , delicate

1:13:04

right , oh interesting . As

1:13:07

the more delicate vessel . Now , you could

1:13:09

then say well , delicate is weak . That's

1:13:11

your cultural appropriation on something right

1:13:14

. Why is

1:13:16

delicate weak right

1:13:20

? Men and women , again , were

1:13:22

both created in God's image . Men and women again

1:13:24

, were both created in God's image . Women who could be more delicate

1:13:27

, whether that's emotionally , whether that is in

1:13:29

terms of sensitivity , whatever that may be

1:13:31

. Physically , we're not just talking

1:13:33

about muscles . Right , Women , they have

1:13:35

smaller muscles . That's

1:13:38

not what he's saying . Delicacy means

1:13:40

the fact that they're sensitive , the fact

1:13:42

that they want to unveil

1:13:45

beauty to the world , the fact that they want

1:13:47

to be romanced . That

1:13:49

delicacy tells us something about the heart of God

1:13:51

.

1:13:52

You want to know something God has that delicacy

1:13:54

, hold on .

1:13:57

Yeah .

1:13:57

God is such a great woman .

1:13:57

If women want to be romanced and that's at the core

1:13:59

of every one of them as a

1:14:01

supreme desire of women they want to be romanced . They

1:14:09

want to be pursued . Right , that means God wants to be romanced . He wants to be pursued . He doesn't want

1:14:11

to . He's going to pursue you with all his heart , but he wants you to pursue him . He's romantic

1:14:13

, right , he is somebody when

1:14:15

we sing worship songs is sentimental

1:14:18

to him . Right , it's romantic to him

1:14:20

. He wants you to pursue him

1:14:22

. He wants you to be romantic to him

1:14:24

. When you see , well

1:14:26

, she's

1:14:32

just being overly dramatic , overly emotional . No , maybe what that's telling you about the character

1:14:34

of God is that he's emotional . That may be because you don't think it's a big deal

1:14:36

. You're not as angry , you're not as upset , you're

1:14:39

not as sensitive . That shows that God is sensitive

1:14:41

to it . You're not sensitive to it because

1:14:43

you took the masculine form of him . She

1:14:47

is teaching you the feminine image of

1:14:49

God , that God is sensitive to

1:14:51

things like that , and I just

1:14:53

have to finish this because I've noticed this

1:14:55

so much .

1:14:56

How emotional is God to send

1:14:58

his son to die for us , like ? How

1:15:00

much emotion is required to even do something like

1:15:02

that ? That's not a logical

1:15:04

response , that's an emotional

1:15:07

charged response , you know .

1:15:09

But to continue with your example , Right

1:15:11

, because he's also very sensitive to sin . You

1:15:13

see this in the inverse in certain regards

1:15:15

. Right , like , okay , so you commit adultery

1:15:18

. What did the law say ? Because the law

1:15:20

is the heart of God , stone him , kill him

1:15:22

, yeah , well , that seems like the heart

1:15:24

of God , then why ? He's just being overly

1:15:26

emotional , isn't he ? He's

1:15:28

taking the woman's side there , right ? Yeah , or

1:15:36

that's what he's telling you , is he's showing

1:15:38

you the sensitivity and how serious he takes sin . Right ? This is

1:15:40

how I treat . I'm this sensitive to sin . You think adultery is bad

1:15:42

, but you don't think it's worth stoning someone over . I'm

1:15:44

telling you , this is how serious and

1:15:47

sensitive I am to sin

1:15:49

. It's worse than you think it is , and

1:15:51

that's often what

1:15:55

I learned from my wife . Sorry

1:15:57

, I'm from the wrong camera . What

1:16:04

I learned from my wife in our marriage is that there's a lot of situations

1:16:06

that are bigger deals than I see

1:16:08

them as . Like I don't see why

1:16:11

is that a big deal , like they shouldn't be upset by that , and

1:16:13

she's like no , it's a big deal . And

1:16:15

she'll expose . She has that discernment , she

1:16:17

has that element that

1:16:20

benefits our marriage , that benefits our ministry

1:16:22

, that I lack God's emotional

1:16:24

sensitivity , so she's more delicate

1:16:26

and aware of certain things that I'm not

1:16:28

. That's not a weakness , that is

1:16:30

strength , yeah Right . That reinforces

1:16:33

my mission as a man , right

1:16:35

, it is very beneficial for me to

1:16:38

have my wife with me and all that , yeah

1:16:40

Right . So we're talking

1:16:42

delicacy . I want to hit a quick point . All that , yeah Right , um , so

1:16:44

we're talking delicacy .

1:16:45

I want to hit a quick point . So we uh I'm not going to say their names , but we

1:16:47

have this uh youth couple in

1:16:49

the church , um , that's . That's fascinating

1:16:52

to me , because the man in

1:16:54

this relationship , um , has a history

1:16:56

of just such anger , um

1:16:59

and

1:17:05

bouts of just kind of fits of rage that he's been

1:17:07

working through over the over , like probably his entire life . But the girl that

1:17:09

he's with now is

1:17:11

, um , very strong-willed but also

1:17:14

very delicate and very girly um

1:17:16

and how she , how she carries herself . And

1:17:19

so I kind of saw a culmination of

1:17:21

uh their relationship

1:17:23

on Sunday because

1:17:25

she had made him this

1:17:28

um hat that was

1:17:30

like a little , had little bear ears

1:17:32

on it . It was super cute . And

1:17:34

so I walk up onto the

1:17:36

uh you know the into the sound booth and I see

1:17:38

him sitting there . He's got kind of this this uh

1:17:41

almost like a mean mugging

1:17:43

face on , as he's wearing this hat

1:17:45

and she's playing with the ears

1:17:47

on his head . And I

1:17:50

saw that and I looked at him and I was like this is why

1:17:52

men need women , because

1:17:54

this is going to make you a better

1:17:56

man , and it's also why men need daughters .

1:18:01

I've never felt more like a man than

1:18:04

letting my daughter paint

1:18:06

my toenails and put

1:18:09

makeup . She still does it . She's like can I do your

1:18:11

hair and do your makeup ? Sure .

1:18:13

Yeah , right , I remember you saw the one pink

1:18:15

nail .

1:18:17

I don't hate it because I actually adore it . What

1:18:19

I hate is makeup Like

1:18:21

I don't know how you women do it , but you just

1:18:23

feel it . You feel the weight on your face . You

1:18:25

try to get it off , it doesn't come off and then it's like you

1:18:28

start breaking out because it's your clog

1:18:30

. Your pores are all clogged , like I'm like , why do they do

1:18:32

this ? This is awful , besides the point Um

1:18:34

, but yeah , that's . That's why we need we need women

1:18:37

, right ?

1:18:37

When I said that to him , though , he kind of

1:18:39

broken this like half grin and I I

1:18:42

don't know if he got it , but it looked like he

1:18:44

kind of something clicked in his head . It's like this is . This

1:18:46

is why you need her . So the other

1:18:48

piece she's making you better .

1:18:50

Weaker means delicate . Right

1:18:52

, it's a delicate , but that doesn't mean

1:18:55

worse . That's what men

1:18:57

need , right ? And

1:18:59

women don't need another

1:19:01

delicate person . They need what

1:19:04

a man brings which is more of the stronger

1:19:06

foundation , who is so oblivious

1:19:09

to some of that reality that she's like , hey

1:19:11

, knucklehead , come here , let me explain to you what's going

1:19:13

on . Right , you

1:19:15

need each other , right ? So

1:19:17

he's saying as the delicate vessel . But

1:19:19

notice , it says vessel , your said partner

1:19:22

, and this is what you got to be careful

1:19:24

with Bible translations , because it

1:19:26

is not partner . It's nowhere close to partner

1:19:28

is that word . The word in

1:19:30

Greek is vessel . But it's not

1:19:32

just vessel , it's not just like

1:19:34

a container , right , what

1:19:36

it actually annotates ? Think

1:19:39

about like a , think

1:19:42

about an irreable

1:19:44

, like family heirloom . Think

1:19:47

about like great grandma's China

1:19:49

. It's delicate and

1:19:51

it's one of a kind , it's valuable

1:19:54

and it's irreplaceable . Okay

1:19:57

, that's the vessel he's talking about . He's

1:19:59

saying she is delicate . He's essentially

1:20:01

saying , men , for the purpose to which

1:20:03

you serve , you better be very considerate

1:20:06

and understanding of your wife's perspective , because

1:20:08

she is like that irreplaceable

1:20:11

, invaluable

1:20:13

, delicate family

1:20:17

heirloom , that china that

1:20:19

if you are not careful and you break that , you

1:20:22

can't replace , that , you can never put it back together . You can

1:20:24

never put it back together . You can't replace it . There's

1:20:26

there's nothing there . Um

1:20:28

, there's no replacement for that . Everybody

1:20:31

just thinks like , oh okay , well , this wife's not working

1:20:33

, let me just go put another one there . That's not how that

1:20:35

works , right . Everybody uniquely

1:20:38

provides their own value . Your wife brings

1:20:40

uniquely immense value

1:20:42

to you . Um I

1:20:45

that you need to be very careful and appreciative

1:20:47

of how she handles

1:20:49

and is able to support you in

1:20:51

your mission . If you truly care

1:20:54

about doing God's will in your

1:20:56

life and being submissive to

1:20:58

what he is telling you to do , then

1:21:00

you should very much care about your wife's

1:21:02

perspective . If you don't care about that

1:21:05

, then now all

1:21:07

the delicacy and all the you know , emotion

1:21:09

and drama and all that intuition

1:21:12

that women bring , that annoy men because we don't understand

1:21:14

it , because it's not us . But

1:21:16

it's completely necessary , but it's completely within

1:21:18

the image of God right that we need

1:21:20

to do what we need to do to be

1:21:22

in God's will . But if I don't care about God's

1:21:25

will , then that stuff that is valuable

1:21:27

to me just now just becomes annoying , right

1:21:30

. And you start seeing that like , okay , you're just , you're just

1:21:32

being dramatic . Why do you have to be dramatic about everything ? It's like

1:21:34

, well , maybe if she's being dramatic about everything

1:21:36

, you're not listening .

1:21:38

Yeah , You're missing .

1:21:39

You're not paying attention and you're not operating

1:21:41

within God's will because you're only doing this half-heartedly

1:21:44

right now . There's this whole other element that you

1:21:46

need to fully dive into doing

1:21:49

what you need to do . So I'm

1:21:51

sorry , women , I

1:21:54

can't relieve you of the

1:21:56

expectation that you have to submit

1:21:58

to your husbands . However here

1:22:01

Peter is talking you need

1:22:03

to be very considerate of them and the immeasurable

1:22:05

value they bring . You

1:22:10

would not take your great-grandma's

1:22:13

china and

1:22:15

then use those cups

1:22:17

to let

1:22:20

the toddlers drink out of .

1:22:21

Yeah , let the dog drink out of you know what I'm saying

1:22:23

.

1:22:24

You don't do that . You treat that with high

1:22:26

value , you protect it , you keep it safe

1:22:28

, you treasure it , right yeah ?

1:22:30

That's how you're supposed to approach your wife . You also don't hide

1:22:32

it away in a box , because

1:22:35

you're ruining the value of it as well .

1:22:39

No , it's an adorning . Yeah , most people

1:22:41

have a china cabinet . If they have that kind of china , it

1:22:44

is there for right . It's the adorning

1:22:46

of her husband . Right , she is to bring

1:22:48

that beauty there it's a crown . So

1:22:52

there's , but then I want to kind of touch this

1:22:54

though . Okay , so now I get to get a little . This

1:22:58

gets a little . See

1:23:00

the unpopular part out loud , controversial

1:23:03

. No , well

1:23:06

, I've made it this far Before I

1:23:08

hit that women

1:23:11

have to submit to their husbands , husbands

1:23:14

have to submit to their wives . So

1:23:18

we always go to Ephesians 5

1:23:20

, right , men , love

1:23:23

your wives as Christ loved the church . Wives

1:23:25

submit to your husband the way he submitted

1:23:28

himself . So we always set this kind of expectation

1:23:30

Men are there to love their wives , wives

1:23:33

are there to submit to their husbands . Right , that

1:23:37

that's Ephesians what ? 521

1:23:40

. Back up one verse . Okay

1:23:43

, back up one verse . You

1:23:47

guys going to it now . I actually didn't have it written down .

1:23:49

Ephesians what ?

1:23:50

Chapter five .

1:23:51

Yep Ephesians , I'm on two , three , four

1:23:53

, five what 21 .

1:23:55

What does Ephesians 21 say ?

1:23:59

Well , I'll read 22 . Wives , submit

1:24:01

yourselves to your own husbands as

1:24:03

you do to the Lord . Verse

1:24:05

21 , submit to one

1:24:07

another out of reverence for Christ

1:24:09

. Boom , okay . And then for 23 as

1:24:12

well . No , no , no , you don't have to worry about that , because you've already made

1:24:14

my point .

1:24:15

Yeah , wives , submit to your husband

1:24:17

, right , we take that back

1:24:19

up one verse . What is the actual expectation

1:24:21

?

1:24:21

to one another .

1:24:31

Husbands are equally to submit to their wives , as wives are expected to submit to their husbands

1:24:33

. And , um , so let me say the unpopular part . Okay , why then , over and over

1:24:36

, do we keep seeing wives

1:24:39

being called to submit to their husbands in scripture , if

1:24:43

the expectations that we submit to each other Okay

1:24:46

, so so let's just start there . Okay

1:24:49

, if Emran

1:24:51

is expected to submit to you as much as you

1:24:53

are to expect it to submit to him , right

1:24:56

, then why is it constantly

1:24:58

coming and saying Selena , you need to submit to Emran

1:25:00

, selena , you need to submit to Emran . You

1:25:04

see what I'm saying ?

1:25:04

It's probably because you're not you

1:25:07

see what I'm saying . I think it's probably because that's what you're going to struggle

1:25:09

with . There you go , and

1:25:12

this is the unpopular part .

1:25:13

I've said this before about men , so let me start there

1:25:15

, just so I can keep this fair . Okay , I

1:25:27

think that if God didn't tell men to be the spiritual leaders of their home , they wouldn't be

1:25:29

, because I think women make them more natural spiritual leaders . Yeah , men are uh , women are far more

1:25:31

relational than men . That's part of that , that , that that delicacy that they , they possess within

1:25:33

that , that piece . I see this all the time

1:25:35

in church . You see , it doesn't

1:25:37

even matter . Like young women , right ? Like

1:25:39

20 years old , 21 years old . They're

1:25:42

like dragging their boyfriends to church by the ear . Absolutely

1:25:44

, absolutely . Families nope , get

1:25:47

in the car . We're going to church as a family . You see

1:25:49

women as the natural leaders .

1:25:50

I feel like Natural spiritual

1:25:52

leaders , natural spiritual leaders in the home . Yeah , so if God

1:25:54

didn't tell men , and men want to lead in , everything else Right

1:25:57

, except ?

1:25:57

spiritually . If God did not tell men

1:25:59

to lead your home spiritually , they would

1:26:01

not . It would be women . So he says

1:26:03

you need to step up . You need to do this right . It's

1:26:05

actually adding your weakness that I'm giving you that

1:26:08

charge . So likewise

1:26:10

. So if that's true , then I think

1:26:12

the reason why you see , often

1:26:15

the command for wives to submit to their husbands

1:26:17

is because I think women struggle with submission more

1:26:19

than men do , and I think you see

1:26:21

that a lot with women's interactions to each

1:26:23

other do

1:26:27

, and I think you see that a lot with women's interactions to each other , um

1:26:29

, I think and of course this is not true of everyone I think everybody has to grow

1:26:31

into learning submission . Um

1:26:34

, I don't think women also realize how much men

1:26:36

actually submit to women . Um , and

1:26:38

this is what I mean , like , submission

1:26:40

comes in the little things right

1:26:43

. Like all men , even

1:26:45

if your marriage is , you

1:26:47

feel like falling apart . If

1:26:50

I were to go ask that man , would

1:26:53

you take a bullet for your wife

1:26:57

, every one of them ? Yes , absolutely , I would

1:26:59

die for my wife , even with our marriage

1:27:01

falling apart . I would be faithful

1:27:04

in that regard . I would , um , I

1:27:06

would absolutely do that Submit

1:27:09

to that fate for my wife . And the

1:27:11

big things Submission

1:27:13

comes in the little things , right . Um

1:27:15

, the game's on . You've had a long day

1:27:17

at work , you're tired , you just want

1:27:19

to relax , and then , hey , can you come take the

1:27:22

trash out ? And then , when you're done with that . Can

1:27:24

you go do this honey-do list ? Okay

1:27:26

, will do , and

1:27:29

you see , that's the mission . Yeah , do

1:27:32

you think men just love doing your honey-to-do list ? You

1:27:34

guys know what I'm saying Honey-do list .

1:27:35

I don't know what that is A honey-do list . Honey

1:27:38

can you do , and they like

1:27:40

.

1:27:40

You know they'll make a list of things I

1:27:42

need you to do . It's

1:27:51

unfathomable to me to ever make a list of chores to give to my wife . You know

1:27:54

what I mean . How that ? Would go . I'm just

1:27:56

saying like . I

1:27:58

know it's not . I'm just being honest . I'm trying

1:28:00

to be honest and maybe I'm wrong , but

1:28:04

it's very clear that husbands are

1:28:06

to submit to their wives , wives are to submit

1:28:08

to their husbands . Why

1:28:11

are ? wives being called out for not submitting to their husbands

1:28:13

, probably because they struggle with it more . Likewise

1:28:17

, men get called out more for not loving

1:28:19

their wives properly their

1:28:21

way . You see what I'm saying . So

1:28:23

you see this . Where so

1:28:25

our wives not expected to love their husbands ? Of

1:28:27

course they are . Wives don't have a hard

1:28:29

time loving their loving their husbands their husband's

1:28:32

way . Men have a hard time loving their

1:28:34

wives their wife's way , right

1:28:36

? Similarly , men probably

1:28:38

do a little bit better with submission to their wives , and wives

1:28:40

do in submitting to their husbands , so it's called out more

1:28:42

right Like submission to their wives . And wives do in submitting to their husbands , so it's called

1:28:45

out more right Like um , that's a pretty simple explanation

1:28:47

, because the most of the Bible is written

1:28:49

that way .

1:28:50

Um , like Paul wouldn't call out

1:28:52

um the Galatians

1:28:54

for their um , their

1:28:57

issues with submissions , with the uh , with

1:29:00

all the sexual debauchery that was

1:29:02

going on . Um , he wouldn't

1:29:04

call them out the way that he did if it wasn't an issue .

1:29:06

Like he just was talking about something else . Ephesians in particular

1:29:08

. Specific context of Ephesians

1:29:10

and the Ephesus church is that they had the

1:29:13

temple of Artemis there . I mean , it was one of the seventh

1:29:15

wonders of the world .

1:29:17

Oh , I might be thinking of Ephesians and not .

1:29:19

Ephesus yeah , yeah , so from there

1:29:22

, like that was a very sexually free society

1:29:24

. If you grew up in that culture and you weren't a believer

1:29:27

, you were sleeping with prostitutes , probably

1:29:29

since you were old enough .

1:29:31

To sleep with prostitutes Right .

1:29:33

And it wasn't frowned upon , it was celebrated , it

1:29:39

was encouraged being able to go choose

1:29:41

any one of you know a , a

1:29:44

gorgeous prostitute of

1:29:46

of of art and one of Artemis's

1:29:48

priestesses , to go sleep with Right

1:29:50

, and even if it's like , well , I belong to

1:29:52

Christ . I don't really believe in Artemis , but I still

1:29:55

have this free act . You know what I'm saying . Yeah . So

1:29:57

husbands , go , love your

1:29:59

wife the way Christ loved us . Stop

1:30:02

that nonsense . Because of that

1:30:04

, also with that culture , there was almost this hyper-feminism

1:30:06

in Ephesus because seventh

1:30:08

wonder of the world , goddess , artemis , priestesses

1:30:11

, the religious authority , were women , right

1:30:14

? So there was almost just like we are in

1:30:16

charge here , right ? He's like no , start

1:30:18

submitting to your husbands . So the point being

1:30:20

is that for both

1:30:22

the expectations you both submit , and

1:30:25

the expectation for both is that you're supposed

1:30:27

to make it easy for your spouse to

1:30:29

submit to you . Yeah . It becomes

1:30:31

much harder to submit

1:30:33

to your spouse when certain

1:30:36

behavior right is

1:30:38

there , and maybe the reason

1:30:40

wives have a harder time

1:30:42

submitting to their husbands is because husbands

1:30:45

don't make it as easy to submit to as

1:30:47

wives make it for us to submit

1:30:49

to them . You see what I'm saying . So

1:30:51

even just because it may be calling that

1:30:53

out specifically doesn't mean that there's not an underlying cause

1:30:55

of that either . You know what I'm saying ? Both

1:30:58

are expected to submit to one

1:31:00

another .

1:31:00

Yeah , because your wife's not going to submit to your debauchery . Your

1:31:02

wife's not going to submit to your sin . Your

1:31:05

wife's not going to submit to your sin . Your wife's not going to submit to your chaos . So it's like

1:31:07

if you're leading poorly , then

1:31:09

don't expect willful submission

1:31:12

. She may , in her maturity , submit

1:31:15

to create

1:31:17

peace and to hopefully change you over time and

1:31:19

do all the things that we talked about in

1:31:22

Peter , but at the

1:31:24

same time , of course , she'll be combative

1:31:26

if you're leading in an un-Christlike

1:31:29

way . It's like

1:31:31

God doesn't say lead your household however you want , you're supposed

1:31:33

to lead it in God's

1:31:35

way , and you both

1:31:37

mean within submission of Christ right . Yeah .

1:31:40

So kind of wrap this up then . So

1:31:43

one to the point . Right , this

1:31:45

isn't your proof text of model of marriage

1:31:47

in the sense that , like

1:31:51

Peter's point was to the larger

1:31:53

main point , which was what .

1:31:56

Submit to the emperor .

1:31:58

Well , we'll submit to

1:32:00

all human authority for the

1:32:03

Lord's sake , right ? So the first

1:32:05

thing , why should we submit ? It's

1:32:07

all for the Lord's sake and for our

1:32:09

witness to the world . Right Submission

1:32:12

is for Jesus . So

1:32:16

let's say you're like , hey , well

1:32:18

, you talked about it . My husband , my wife

1:32:20

is not easy to submit to Right

1:32:22

, so they're one of those that make it very difficult

1:32:25

to . So you know , god understands that

1:32:27

, he sees that he , he's fair

1:32:29

, right . What is this

1:32:31

actual point ? Say Submit to all

1:32:34

human authority , for the Lord's sake

1:32:36

. You're not submitting

1:32:38

to your spouse just for your spouse's

1:32:40

sake , you're submitting to your spouse

1:32:42

for Jesus's sake . So

1:32:47

in other words , in submitting to your spouse , you're

1:32:49

submitting to Christ To rebel

1:32:51

against that and not submit to your spouse

1:32:53

. You are then rebelling and not submitting to

1:32:55

Christ . Does

1:32:57

that make sense ? A slave is not

1:33:00

really submitting to their master . A slave is submitting

1:33:02

to Jesus right

1:33:04

To go . Submit to their master , harsh or not

1:33:06

, they're not submitting to their master , they're submitting

1:33:08

to Christ For

1:33:11

a free . People are not submitting

1:33:13

to an emperor , they are submitting to Christ . Wives

1:33:16

are not submitting to their husbands , they're submitting to

1:33:18

Christ . Husbands are not submitting

1:33:20

to their wives , they are submitting to Christ

1:33:22

and I think that kind of central

1:33:24

piece right All the things that scripture

1:33:27

tells Christians to be submissive

1:33:29

to government . Right

1:33:32

, paul and Romans be

1:33:34

submissive to government , be submissive in your marriage , be

1:33:37

submissive to your boss and

1:33:39

those authorities . Right Like over

1:33:41

and over and over . This is a concept . In

1:33:43

other words , if you could say it this way show

1:33:46

me I can show you your submission

1:33:48

to Christ based off who I see you

1:33:50

submit to Right

1:33:52

. Show me your submission to other people . I can

1:33:54

show you how submitted over you are to Christ

1:33:57

, because that's what he's told you to do .

1:33:59

It's out of obedience .

1:34:01

And ultimate submission to him . Yeah Right

1:34:04

, obedience and ultimate submission to him . Right

1:34:06

, like I have a few . If you love me , what

1:34:08

does he say ? Then go love each other

1:34:10

, right ? If

1:34:12

you love me , go feed my sheep . If

1:34:14

you submit to me , then you need to submit to each other

1:34:16

and all the other worldly authorities . If you

1:34:18

belong to me , then go be holy , for I am

1:34:20

holy . In other words , on

1:34:23

things we do on behalf of Christ as

1:34:25

believers . We

1:34:33

do on behalf of Christ when somebody

1:34:35

in church offends you and hurts you to where you want

1:34:37

to leave the church . He calls you to serve . And how does

1:34:39

it ? Love the people of God , because

1:34:42

I have loved you , submit

1:34:44

to that when people hurt you . I

1:34:47

didn't call you to to to

1:34:50

serve the church for this church's sake or to

1:34:52

serve a pastor . You're serving the church

1:34:54

because you're serving me . I told you to

1:34:56

go serve the church . So when somebody hurts

1:34:58

you , you have no excuse to disconnect

1:35:00

fellowship with them . Let

1:35:03

me just be very clear . I don't mean there's

1:35:05

obviously some things that you're like I need to disconnect

1:35:07

fellowship from you . Know what I'm saying ? What I'm

1:35:09

saying is that just because somebody

1:35:13

has hurt or offended you and

1:35:15

you don't want to resolve it with them . It's just easier for you to leave

1:35:18

and go to the church down the street . He

1:35:20

says that's not honoring . Go

1:35:23

, handle this the way I told you to

1:35:25

handle it , right , go , go . Or maybe

1:35:27

it's a dispute with the pastor ? Go

1:35:29

, submit to your pastor um on

1:35:31

this Right Um cause . In doing so

1:35:33

, you're submitting to me by serving them

1:35:36

you're serving me . Um , so first

1:35:38

we submit for the sake of Christ

1:35:40

and our witness Right . Um , For the sake of Christ

1:35:42

and our witness

1:35:44

right , we do not submit

1:35:46

to our government on things we disagree

1:35:48

with because we agree with them . We're

1:35:52

submitting because we love Jesus . And if

1:35:55

a believer , if

1:35:57

we , how am I ? How are I

1:35:59

to say this ? If we

1:36:01

are , if we lack submission in our walk

1:36:03

, we

1:36:05

are not attractive to people . It

1:36:08

is our faith and our walk that is supposed to draw

1:36:10

people to Christ . Yeah . We

1:36:15

just become annoying , so you could prove yourself right , right .

1:36:17

People love to do that . Right , that's

1:36:19

the easy thing and get the world to hate you .

1:36:21

Yeah , or you could be submissive

1:36:24

, where everybody else would say something

1:36:27

just out of ego to prove themselves . Right

1:36:29

, you submit to draw

1:36:31

people in for the sake of Christ .

1:36:33

Yeah , but it's not to dismiss your

1:36:35

point you still

1:36:37

bring up . This is right , this

1:36:39

is true and this is accurate

1:36:42

. This is what I believe . But I'm

1:36:44

submitting because that

1:36:46

submission is all . You are in a position of authority

1:36:48

and so I'm submitting because this is

1:36:51

also what I'm called to do .

1:36:52

Because if you don't submit , the world doesn't see light

1:36:54

. They see a problem . Yeah . You know

1:36:56

what I mean and you don't want people looking at Christ as a problem

1:36:59

. You want them looking at him as the answer and

1:37:02

, um , remember , it's not just for the Lord's

1:37:04

sake but by doing good that we can silence

1:37:06

the talk of ignorant and foolish people so

1:37:09

people could come at you all day . They're

1:37:11

going to still mock you . They're going to yeah , they're going to do that , but

1:37:14

you continue doing good the way you should , and you

1:37:16

continue to submit right , not being

1:37:18

that problem , right Just to be

1:37:20

the problem , but instead being submissive

1:37:22

in that you're going to silence

1:37:25

their foolish talk because other people are going to look

1:37:27

at that and be like dude , that that dude's an idiot Like

1:37:29

you see the way that he was making fun of the like . These people

1:37:31

are amazing and they may even be

1:37:33

somebody that are like I don't really I'm not sure

1:37:35

I believe in in in

1:37:39

in Christianity and but I do know that those are good people

1:37:41

and they did not deserve that . And and you know what I'm saying

1:37:43

your actions will silence

1:37:45

foolish talk , your words

1:37:47

and your , your tweets

1:37:50

and your Facebook posts and

1:37:52

all of that doesn't draw them

1:37:54

to you , right ? Um , so

1:37:57

first is , for the Lord's sake and witness

1:37:59

. Second , um , and we already kind

1:38:01

of hit it , but submission applies to all believers

1:38:03

, regardless of gender , regardless

1:38:05

of your race , economic or social status in

1:38:08

marriage , whether you're husband

1:38:10

, wife . This is an expectation

1:38:12

to everybody . And then the last thing I would well really

1:38:14

just the last two things . Submission

1:38:17

to the character of your spouse . Um

1:38:31

, when , when it says , men , you are to be considerate of the delicacy and

1:38:34

the value that your wife brings in a marriage . If she feels like you're

1:38:36

not being considerate and you feel like you

1:38:38

are right , like no , what

1:38:40

do you mean ? I'm not being in my best way

1:38:42

, I've been considerate to you and she's like

1:38:44

I don't think you have been Right , it

1:38:47

doesn't matter what you think . Submission

1:38:49

to that is then saying I submit

1:38:51

to what your view of that is . You're

1:38:55

saying I'm not being considerate enough . How am I not being considerate

1:38:57

enough ? I will submit to that . Yeah

1:38:59

, help me become more considerate .

1:39:01

There's a line from the

1:39:03

video game God of War , where

1:39:06

the main character tells

1:39:08

his son don't be sorry

1:39:10

, be better .

1:39:12

That's where you get that from , and

1:39:16

it's like it's kind of interesting there , because

1:39:20

that's what your point remind me of .

1:39:21

It's like don't don't just . It's

1:39:23

like , even if you admit that you're , you're sorry , like don't

1:39:25

just say you're sorry and do the same thing over and