There's no time to waste. In this episode Joe concocts his very own VHS cassette horror anthology. Steve reports his very own fading feature memories. And Log purports his very own sock tipperies and trickories.

Is that even what purports means? There's literally no time to google "define purports". I'm sorry, we really have to get on with this. Hey google, define purports. Oh wow, yeah okay that's not even almost the correct usage of the word.