0:00

Hey, they're friends. Hey everybody, how's

0:02

it going out there? I'm Eli, I'm

0:04

Diana. What a week? What

0:07

a week? Indeed, we're going to a wedding this weekend.

0:09

I'm excited about that. Ye, dear

0:12

friend Gabby, very excited about

0:14

this. It's gonna be a really fun wedding. Yeah, we're

0:16

worried about keeping up. They're hard drinkers.

0:19

They are a couple professional partiersessional

0:22

partiers.

0:22

Yeah, she's

0:25

a professional dancer, so stamina

0:28

is kind of her thing. It's true. Yeah,

0:30

I don't know. I don't know. I don't understand it. And

0:32

having done the Fringe Festival for a period of

0:34

time now I have learned that dancers

0:37

camp party. Oh my god, dancers

0:39

be throwing down constantly. Yeah,

0:42

because I don't know how well they

0:45

do. They've got the metabolism of

0:47

like hummingbirds. It's

0:49

insane, well and

0:52

and a bit of an unhealthy

0:54

body image thing. So they'll always

0:56

be like, oh, before a show, I just don't eat for a few

0:59

days, and I'll be like, so

1:03

they just drink everything. I remember

1:05

when I was a big energy drinker

1:07

or a soda drinker, and

1:10

I felt bad if I didn't have one

1:12

right, So my body would start alerting me

1:15

like, hey, we need the thing you always drink.

1:17

Oh god, it's been two hours. I better

1:19

crack another energy drink. Oh.

1:22

Then I got kidney stones and

1:25

I never drank one again, and I still

1:27

get kidney stones. So I guess maybe

1:29

I should just keep drinking. I'm wait a second, Hey,

1:31

well now I actually remember that. What

1:34

does that show my strange addiction or

1:37

something like that where they had this

1:39

she was like a nervous or a nursing student

1:42

or something, and she she just

1:44

ate a crazy amount of sugar every day, Like she drank

1:46

a bunch of soda, and she ate like Doritos

1:49

for lunch. And I remember them trying

1:51

to physically show

1:53

her how much sugar in a day she was drinking

1:56

by like bringing pounds of sugar, you

1:59

know, and like showing her the mini bags yea,

2:02

And none of that worked, like them

2:04

showing her the amount of sugars. She was like, ah, hush,

2:06

sure, And then they did a test on her

2:08

and found she was pre diabetic, and she was like that

2:10

really messed me up. What did

2:13

you expect? Did you not pay attention

2:15

to medical skills? Learning

2:17

how to be a nurse. I think that's the thing too, is like you

2:19

can feel fine right and

2:22

and be you know, and your body is

2:24

shutting down one by one it's

2:26

organs, and you can also feel terrible and

2:28

you're perfectly good. I think that's that's

2:31

most of my thing is like a

2:33

lot of times I'm like, God, where's this sharp stabbing

2:35

pain in my abdomen? And they go and they're like blood

2:38

work scans, you know,

2:40

physical tests, all these things. You're

2:42

fine, dude. I don't know why you feel

2:44

stabbing pains all over your body. Maybe

2:46

someone out there has like a voodoo dollar of you. I

2:48

mean, you know, some

2:51

kind of magic, definitely snappening. What

2:53

do you do to someone that they have a voodoo

2:56

Where to begin? Where to begin? Oh?

2:58

The many times I've been a real all

3:00

of my enemies out there, they're always

3:02

doing things well. Actually, speaking

3:05

of people who have a lot of enemies, that's

3:08

kind of a good leader. Today, I'm very excited

3:10

about this story because actually it's

3:13

about a distant relation of

3:15

mine, an ancestor of mine. Oh.

3:18

I may have talked before about my Scottish granny,

3:21

but on her side we are descended

3:23

from Lord Robert Dudley, who was

3:25

a favorite of Queen Elizabeth the First

3:28

No Kidding and an earle.

3:30

So by extension, you should

3:33

be a favorite of Prince

3:35

Harry. Well. Listen,

3:37

if he had met me, I would be I'm

3:41

sure we would get along great. He

3:44

likes actresses, so oh yeah, there

3:46

you go, there you go. That's here. That's

3:48

the number one quality he's looking for in a person.

3:50

And he likes California. I like California.

3:53

Come on, he enjoys

3:55

having money. I enjoy having money. I'm sure once

3:58

I have I'm starling speculation

4:01

station. I enjoy money. But

4:06

I'm pretty sure. Hey, he's got a podcast.

4:08

You've got a podcast? Hey, right there?

4:10

In fact, he and I could have a podcast,

4:13

and you and Megan could have a podcast. Would

4:15

that be fun if we did, like a podcast host

4:18

swap? I think you I think you would end

4:20

up doing a ridiculous romance episode

4:22

about me and Megan Mark run off

4:24

together. Yeah, she'd

4:26

been like, sure, the handsome

4:28

prince was fine and all, but you,

4:31

sir um um,

4:35

have a quality as well that I

4:37

like. And it is the kidney

4:40

stone, you know, random

4:49

stabbing pains you get in your body all the time,

4:51

just get me going huge

4:54

turn on. You

4:56

know, she would probably like that, you know how like

4:59

low drama, you know what I mean, because

5:01

like nobody no offense to you, but nobody

5:03

in England really cares what you do. So

5:09

she's probably like, Wow, we can go on a date

5:11

and like nobody even asks a question. That's

5:13

fair. But I would speculate that

5:16

part of Megan Markle's thing is

5:18

that she must like the drama a little

5:20

right. Well, perhaps she

5:22

can't have not known what she was getting into.

5:25

Yeah, I guess, I guess you don't go you

5:27

know what, I like a low key life. Yeah, I'm

5:29

gonna marry Prince Harry of

5:31

England. I was really

5:34

not expecting this drama. All

5:36

right. Well, we've got some English

5:39

folk to talk about. We sure do. Because

5:41

Queen Elizabeth the First had a

5:43

favorite at court, her handsome

5:46

and dashing master of the horse,

5:49

Lord Robert Dudley, the

5:51

Earl of Lester, my

5:54

distant ancestor, and

5:56

Elizabeth was so into him that

5:58

people thought that she would surely marry

6:00

him and make him the king consort.

6:03

There's only one problem. Robert

6:05

Dudley was already married to a

6:08

beautiful woman named Amy, Rob's

6:10

Heart. But one day Amy was

6:12

found dead and the kingdom

6:15

exploded with speculation that Robert

6:17

had killed his wife in cold blood

6:20

so that he could marry the queen. So

6:22

today we want to talk about the possible

6:25

love affair between Lord Robert Dudley

6:27

and Queen Elizabeth and decide once

6:30

and for all if Robert Dudley is guilty

6:32

of married. Let's go, hey

6:35

the French, come listen. Well, Elia

6:38

and Diana got some stories to tell. There's

6:40

no matchmaking a romantic tips.

6:43

It's just about ridiculous relationships.

6:45

A lover might be any type of person at

6:47

all, an abstract concert, a concrete

6:50

wall. But if there's a story where the

6:52

second plants ridiculous

6:55

romans a production of iHeartRadio.

6:59

All right, Since his story involves royals,

7:02

we know how complicated that can get.

7:04

So it's best to get a little background and context.

7:07

Let's light a candle, put on

7:10

our best seductive smile,

7:12

and have a quick fling with history.

7:16

What a mess. King

7:18

Henry the Eighth had royally

7:21

rumbled England with his Church

7:23

of England stunts. Oh sure, right, we

7:25

all know he wanted to divorce his wife, Catherine

7:27

of Arragon, in order to marry his mistress

7:29

Anne Bolin, but the Pope would not

7:32

let him, so he declared that England

7:34

would have a new religion, Protestantism.

7:36

Easier to invent a new religion than

7:39

to change the Pope's mind. But

7:41

Henry actually kept a lot of the same

7:43

Catholic doctrine and rituals with his

7:45

new religion. Like, his main concern was to

7:48

just get rid of Katherine, and after that he kind of

7:50

lost interest in Protestantism. Whatever.

7:52

Wow, I was just like, yeah, yeah,

7:54

I got what I needed out of you. Yeah, very single

7:57

minded individual. You're telling me

7:59

that King the Eighth wasn't very devoted

8:01

to his religion. Not

8:06

a guy would like a lot of the courage of his conviction.

8:08

Yeah, whatever religion was going on was really

8:10

just an inconvenience to him, exactly.

8:13

I mean, I just need one thing from you. Well.

8:16

King Henry had one son and heir,

8:18

Edward, with his third wife Jane

8:20

Seymour, and Edward would be

8:23

the first monarch to be raised Protestants,

8:26

and unlike his dad, Edward was extremely

8:28

enthusiastic. Yeah. In fact,

8:30

he became somewhat obsessed with the new

8:33

Church and with setting it apart

8:35

from the Catholic religion, so when

8:37

Edward ascended to the throne at the tender

8:39

age of nine, he banned

8:42

Catholic rituals like Mass as well

8:44

as clerical celibacy. Wow. What

8:46

a precocious nine year olds geez.

8:49

Well, of course, at that age Edward

8:51

wasn't really old enough to act

8:53

as king, so he had this royal

8:55

counsel around him, who were really the ones run

8:57

in the show. One of his prince advisors

9:00

was a guy named John Dudley,

9:03

the Earl of Warwick, who was

9:05

a staunch Protestant like most of the council.

9:07

Of course, Edward wanted a lot of pro Protestants

9:10

around him, and John Dudley

9:12

had led religious reform under King

9:14

Henry. He also fought the Scots and

9:17

he pretty ruthlessly put down

9:19

land rebellions in Norfolk, so

9:22

he was basically the top dog around court.

9:25

His service to the young King Edward won

9:27

him a couple of dukedoms, and he became

9:29

better known as the Duke of Northumberland,

9:32

the Humberland. John Dudley had

9:35

thirteen children, and

9:37

his one, two, three four fifth

9:39

oldest son, born in fifteen thirty

9:42

two, was Robert Dudley,

9:44

and he's the subject of our episode today.

9:47

Of course, Diana's great great great

9:49

great grand cousin

9:52

of Gold whatever it is. Somehow,

9:56

somewhere somewhere in that tree, one

9:58

of them branches is Robert. Robert

10:02

grew up, of course, around Royalty. He

10:04

lived at court as a companion to young

10:06

King Edward. He's just a little bit older than

10:09

him, and he even shared a

10:11

tutor with edwards half

10:13

sister, Elizabeth Well

10:16

tutor. So who was tutors

10:18

tutor? I love it. I think his name

10:20

is Roger or something. I just love the idea

10:22

of Roger. I'm a tutors tutor. Roger

10:25

the tutors Tutor, starring Jude

10:27

Law this year on HBO.

10:30

The Tutors Tutor. So

10:33

Robert and his little classmate

10:35

Elizabeth had a lot in comment. They

10:38

were the same age, they were both smart and curious.

10:40

They loved hunting and dancing

10:42

and lively conversation, so they

10:45

became very close friends, and

10:47

fifteen fifty Robert fell

10:50

in love with Amy robs Hart, who

10:52

was the daughter of a wealthy gentleman farmer

10:54

in Norfolk, who he likely

10:56

met when he participated in oppressing

10:58

that farmer's rebellion alongside

11:00

his father. Oh yeah, okay, riding

11:03

into Norfolk and being like you Norfuker

11:06

is better, better stop rebellion around

11:08

here. We're gonna put you down, you

11:10

know. And I had a lot of sympathy for that rebellion because

11:12

they were basically like, we need land to like

11:14

grow food. You know, nine

11:18

times out of ten a farmer's rebellion.

11:21

You want to be on the farmer's side. Yeah,

11:23

of course I like because usually it's like, hey,

11:26

we're feeding the whole country and you're screwing

11:28

us over But you know, peasants, right,

11:30

I always want if

11:33

you give a farmer a salary, he's

11:35

gonna want a glass of milk. You know what I'm saying. You

11:38

can't let him have an inch. Well,

11:41

anyway, this was a pretty good match. Robert

11:43

was a noble from a family with considerable

11:46

influence. Obviously, it's so pretty good husband

11:48

material. He didn't have a lot of money

11:50

of his own though, because he's, you know, the fifth eldest

11:53

son. He's not in line to inherit a lot of stuff. I

11:55

guess by the time you get down to the fifth son, there's

11:57

not much left to give, I know, right, yeah,

12:00

so he needed a rich wife and that

12:02

you know, Amy's the daughter of this wealthy gentleman

12:04

farmer. Okay, so that could lead to some

12:07

money in the coffers. Meanwhile, John

12:09

Dudley was very pleased for Robert

12:12

to marry a Norfolk lady because that would

12:14

increase his influence in Norfolk, where

12:16

a lot of Norfolks did not like him

12:19

because of the whole ruthless pushing down a

12:21

rebellion there. So

12:23

it was all good with the family, and they

12:25

got married with King Edward in attendance

12:28

very fancy wedding, and another of King

12:30

Edward's principal advisors, John

12:32

Dudley's colleague, William Cecil,

12:35

disparagingly called it a quote

12:37

carnal match or a love match

12:40

at the wedding. Y everything to say at somebody's

12:42

wedding. So we know that

12:44

Amy and Robert were in love, like

12:47

they were sincerely into each other.

12:49

Right, And William Cecil is like, yeah,

12:51

a marriage for love. Disgust

12:53

disgusting, irresponsible.

12:56

Right, I'm sure he thought, Oh, Robert Dudley

12:58

could do better than this armer's daughter, right,

13:01

Right, I don't care how much money she has. Right,

13:03

But Robert is like, he looks at her lovingly

13:05

and it makes me want to puke. Robert's

13:08

like, go ahead and puke, then William. Now

13:11

neither Robert nor Amy had any money

13:13

at this juncture, because Amy would not inherit

13:15

anything until both her parents had died.

13:17

Okay, so they relied on both of their families

13:19

to kind of keep them afloat as a married couple. That's

13:22

all well and good, except Robert's

13:25

family was about to suffer quite

13:27

a fall. See, because

13:30

Edward the six the Young King, was very

13:32

sick, probably with tuberculosis, and

13:35

by the time he was only fifteen years

13:37

old, it was very apparent that he

13:39

was not going to live much longer. So

13:41

Edward's new obsession became the

13:44

succession. It's

13:46

just like, my current obsession is succession.

13:49

He's like, I just love Tom Wombs, Dams

13:51

and the discuss. I know, but can you believe

13:53

the Kendall? Okay, we won't spoil anything, but like,

13:56

oh my god. So Edward

13:58

the sixth did not want

14:00

his half sister Mary Tudor, who

14:02

was the next in line to become

14:05

queen after he died, because she

14:07

was Catholic, so he wanted

14:09

to dismiss her as a successor,

14:12

but Duke John Dudley told

14:14

him, hey, look, rules are rules,

14:16

and if you disinherit your half sister

14:19

Mary, you're gonna have to disinherit

14:21

your other half sister, Elizabeth

14:23

Tutor, even though she was Protestant.

14:26

So King Edward would much rather have had

14:28

Elizabeth. So he's like, can I get rid of Mary?

14:31

And they're like, if you get rid of Mary, Elizabeth's gotta

14:33

go too. So you lose both of them, right, I

14:35

think, because the reason being, you

14:37

know, she's a half sister and so

14:39

on and so forth. So they're like, she's you know, if

14:41

she doesn't have a claim, then neither does elizab M

14:44

can't You can't reason your way through this one, buddy.

14:47

So Edward's like, all right, fine, forget

14:49

the Tutor girls. And he

14:51

ended up naming his cousin, Lady

14:54

Jane Gray as his heir, and

14:56

this totally ignored the acts

14:58

of succession that his father, King Henry

15:01

the Eighth had set up, and Edward

15:03

wrote his own decree, which he called the

15:05

Devise for the Succession. John

15:07

Dudley, Robert's father, was by King

15:10

Edward's side the whole time, as they worked out

15:12

the details, and he promised Young

15:14

Edward, you know, don't you worry

15:16

about it, my lord, I will uphold your

15:18

wishes after your death and make sure

15:21

Lady Jane Gray is queen. We've

15:24

got it right here in writing. You're the king. How

15:26

could anyone have a problem

15:28

with that? There will be no Catholic

15:30

Queen of England while I live. Absolutely

15:33

so. When King Edward died in July

15:35

of fifteen fifty three, John

15:37

Dudley got to work proclaiming

15:40

Lady Jane as the Queen of England.

15:43

But a lot of people did not really love this

15:45

plan. What like a bunch of people

15:47

in the Council of the Royal in the court really

15:49

hated it because Lady Jane

15:52

Gray just happened to be newly

15:54

married to the Duke of Northumberland,

15:57

John Dudley's second youngest

15:59

son, Oldford Dudley. So

16:01

they saw this whole thing as

16:03

just a grab for power for Dudley's

16:06

own family. How convenient,

16:09

Yeah, that, Oh, Lady Jane

16:11

is going to be queen and she just happens

16:13

to be, you know, I mean, you can see why John

16:15

Dudley was so on board with it. Of course,

16:17

my Lord if that's what you wish

16:20

for my son's wife to

16:22

be your heir, then you know I'll

16:25

go for it. I guess my hands are tied. What

16:28

can I do? What can I say? Now?

16:30

Another person who hated Edward's little

16:32

device for the succession was Mary

16:34

herself. Obviously. Instead

16:37

of attending Edward's deathbed, which

16:40

was really just a plot to grab Mary and keep

16:42

her from fomenting a rebellion, Mary

16:44

smartly fled to Norfolk. Oh

16:47

Now, remember most of Norfolk hated

16:49

John Dudley, and it's also

16:51

where a lot of Catholics lived, so

16:53

Mary was able to rally a lot of support to

16:55

her side. She went to exactly the right place

16:58

for sympathetic ear. Yeah.

17:01

Meanwhile, John Dudley was in London crowning

17:03

Lady Jane Gray, and he sent

17:06

his son Robert Dudley, along with three

17:08

hundred men to Norfolk to suppress

17:10

Mary's plans, while John stayed

17:12

behind in London to gather forces to

17:15

meet her army. So he's very much

17:17

prepared for an uprising from Mary's

17:19

Mary's side, but it was too late.

17:22

Mary had already written to the council

17:24

in London, and since they did

17:26

not like Dudley, they went ahead and named

17:29

Mary the Queen behind his back. So

17:31

Mary immediately got to work punishing

17:33

the people who tried to prevent her ascension,

17:37

and the Duke of Northumberland

17:39

John Dudley was arrested, he was

17:42

forced to convert to Catholicism,

17:44

and he was beheaded ah,

17:47

and he used his last words to plead

17:50

for mercy for his sons. Man.

17:53

This religious wars, I

17:55

mean, I am not I think

17:57

it's been said. I'm I'm no

18:00

theologian, h nor am

18:02

I practicing Christian. But

18:05

I do get so caught up

18:07

in these Catholic and Protestant

18:09

wars where I'm like, well, we believe

18:11

the exact same thing that you do, but differently.

18:14

I know, But dare you

18:18

so crazy? Yeah? It's a

18:20

lot. And the fact that's during Edward

18:22

and Mary's reigns they were burning

18:24

people at the state. Yeah, for being either

18:26

Catholic or Protestants, depending on who's

18:29

in charge at the time. You better accept Jesus Christ

18:31

as your Lord and savior. I did, well,

18:34

do it different next time? Well,

18:38

you know, it's almost like people

18:40

in power are using I

18:43

don't want to sound crazy here, are using

18:46

you know, fine, details and reinterpretations

18:49

of religion to further their power

18:51

and oppress other people. But you

18:53

know, speculations state. So

18:56

after poor John Dudley was

18:59

beheaded, Mary, through

19:01

his sons Robert and Guildford,

19:04

and lady Jane into the Tower of London

19:06

to await their trial and punishment.

19:09

Robert Dudley was there in July of fifteen

19:12

fifty three, and his wife Amy was

19:14

able to visit him during his imprisonment.

19:16

But Mary's troubles were not over yet

19:19

because her main order of business was to get

19:21

married and have an heir. That's what you do as

19:23

a queen, right well, and look

19:25

at how much trouble had come from a succession.

19:28

Everyone was obsessed with it, like, let's just

19:30

get a nice get this

19:32

chaos done. A lady has a baby,

19:35

the baby is the heir, Done and

19:37

done. No stepdaughters, half

19:39

sisters, weird uncles

19:42

were done with that. We're done now. Of

19:44

course, everyone wanted her to marry an Englishman,

19:46

preferably this Earl who was named Edwood

19:49

Courtney. But King

19:51

Charles the fifth of Spain wanted

19:53

to ally with England, so he

19:56

brought over his son Prince Philip,

19:58

and was like Leionot a leag, this

20:00

handsome boy, and

20:02

Mary was actually like, I do I do

20:05

like him, Maybe I'll marry Prince

20:07

Philip. But there was one big problem

20:09

with these two getting married, because Philip

20:12

was just as staunchly Catholic

20:14

as Mary was, and people started

20:16

to worry that if they had a Catholic

20:18

queen and a Catholic king that

20:21

this would completely upend the Church of

20:23

England and return the nation to

20:25

strict Catholicism. So before

20:27

they got married, a bunch of Protestants, led

20:30

by Thomas Wyatt the Younger, hatched

20:32

a plot against Mary called Wyatt's

20:35

Rebellion, where they would assassinate

20:37

Mary, place her sister Elizabeth

20:40

on a throne as a Protestant queen, and

20:42

have her Mary Edward Courtney,

20:44

the guy they wanted her first place real into Edward

20:46

Courtney. They love it, but the

20:49

plot was discovered and three

20:51

thousand insurgents were arrested.

20:54

Robert Dudley got a new cell mate in the

20:56

Tower of London his old

20:59

childhood friend Elizabeth

21:01

Tudor, who was put in jail on suspicion

21:04

of being part of the rebellion, probably because

21:06

all the rebels were marching around chanting

21:09

her name, waving flags with her face on. Right.

21:13

Yeah, history historians are like, she probably

21:15

didn't really have anything to do with it, but of course,

21:18

you know, got in jail. She's

21:20

just like, oh my god, all these people are in the streets. They

21:22

want me. I've

21:25

got nothing to do with this. I said nothing, but if you don't

21:27

want okay, okay, I'll do it. Well.

21:29

Eventually, Lady Jane Gray,

21:31

whose father had taken part in Wyatt's

21:34

rebellion and also of

21:36

course was the ex Queen, She

21:38

was known as the Nine Days Queen oh

21:40

Man, Her husband Guildford

21:43

Dudley, and one hundred and fifty

21:45

if the Wyatt's Rebellion insurgents were

21:48

executed, and Edward

21:50

Courtney was exiled, which

21:52

I feel sorry for him. He's like, I'm just a perspective

21:54

groom for two ladies and then kicked out of my country,

21:57

like this is great. But Robert Dudley

21:59

and Elizabeth Tudor were set

22:01

free. You oh, they were allowed to Elizabeth

22:04

was allowed to join her half sister, Queen

22:06

Mary at court, and Robert Dudley

22:08

went back to his wife Amy Robsart

22:11

in October fifteen fifty four.

22:13

So it's been a little over a year at the tower.

22:16

Robert and Amy. You know, they

22:18

needed a lot of help financially at this point,

22:21

since Robert's family had fallen so far

22:23

from grace. Until Amy inherited

22:25

her family's money and property in fifteen

22:28

fifty seven, were sort of put them on some more stable

22:30

ground. But they still moved around a

22:32

lot, so they were often staying with different friends

22:34

in different parts of the country. But in

22:36

August of that same year, fifteen fifty

22:39

seven, Robert went to fight for the

22:41

now King Philip the Second, after

22:44

which he and his surviving family

22:46

members were restored to respectability

22:48

at Mary's next parliament. Okay,

22:51

all right, so all right,

22:53

yes, you guys like kind of tried to overthrow

22:56

us, or at least your families did, right, But

22:58

Elizabeth wanted you come sit at

23:01

my feet in court. It's probably as much

23:03

of an insult as it is forgiveness, right,

23:06

And Robert, you just go off

23:08

and fight for me, and if you don't die, we'll

23:10

be friends again, right, Okay, And that

23:12

is quite a relief, because it's no comfortable thing

23:14

to be in disgrace with the monarch. Yeah,

23:17

although sometimes being the favorite

23:20

isn't so comfortable either, as

23:22

Robert was about to discover. Oh,

23:25

they will tell you all about that right after

23:27

these words, welcome

23:32

back to Queen Mary's court. So

23:35

Queen Mary the First, who we might

23:37

know better as Bloody Mary, but

23:40

that's another story, died in November

23:43

of fifteen fifty eight, and it looks

23:45

like she never produced another heir because

23:47

her sister, Queen Elizabeth the First, ascended

23:50

to the throne. And this is where everything

23:52

changed for Robert Dudley and his

23:54

wife Amy. One of the first

23:56

things that Elizabeth did was make her

23:59

bestie, Robert Dudley, her Master

24:01

of Horse. This is a very prominent

24:03

position. It basically meant that he was in charge

24:06

of all of his favorite things, like everything

24:09

to do with the horses and the hounds, also

24:11

royal transportation and accommodation. And

24:14

he planned most of the festivities around

24:16

her coronation too. So he's like the royal

24:19

party planner, right, the royal

24:21

guy who gets to hang out with the horses and dogs.

24:23

Like, can I have this position I've

24:25

had? I mean he was in charge of

24:27

everything like the breeding dud

24:30

horses, the meat, like he's in charge of

24:32

all of it and then also whenever the court moved,

24:34

which they did a lot, he had to make sure.

24:37

He had to arrange all the transportation for all

24:39

the stuff and all the people and everything. He's like,

24:41

you know those blankets we put over him.

24:43

I don't like the yellow trim anymore. Let's

24:45

make it purple. Give it some pizzas trumpet

24:49

logo on the side. He's like, feeling

24:51

the seats, the cushions, you know, Royal chaise.

24:54

She's like, oh, you think these

24:56

squabs are good enough? Of the Queen's ass

25:00

stuff with more goose feathers. So

25:03

obviously this was a huge job,

25:05

and everybody agreed that Robert Dudley

25:08

was eminently suited for this position.

25:10

He was apparently quite the horseman.

25:13

He was also an expert jouster

25:16

as well as an indefatigable

25:18

tennis player, and

25:21

he was the Queen's most frequent dance

25:23

partner. By April of fifteen

25:26

fifty nine, he was elected a Night

25:28

of the Garter, the highest honor

25:30

in the Kingdom. Not Dad Robert

25:33

right from from below from

25:35

the Tower of London. So the Night of the

25:37

Garter in a matter of years,

25:39

but of course, having eighty six

25:42

jobs at court, meant that he

25:44

was never really back at his own home

25:46

very much. He visited his wife

25:48

Amy a couple of days over Easter in fifteen

25:51

fifty nine, and she got to

25:53

come out and watch him work for a month in

25:55

May at court, and he also would

25:57

send her presents all the time. You know, Sorr,

26:00

I can make it m stuff

26:02

and goose feathers again tonight. But

26:04

that was pretty much it. Otherwise she

26:07

was in Hertfordshire and he

26:09

was at court. He was just required to be

26:11

at the beck and call of his best friend,

26:14

the Queen, which brings us to this

26:16

episode's side piece,

26:19

and what a side piece she is. It's

26:22

time to party. Queen

26:25

Elizabeth the First had fallen

26:27

super in love with her

26:29

BFF Robert Dudley.

26:32

She basically never let him leave her side.

26:35

One court chronicle recorded that Robert

26:37

was quote commanded to say he

26:39

did nothing with his wife when

26:41

he came to her, as seldom

26:44

he did. Wow wow, So

26:46

he straight up how to be there. I didn't touch her, I didn't

26:48

her. We did nothing. So

26:50

it's oh, so Robert, you were visiting

26:53

your wife. What did you two get into? H We

26:56

sat very far apart and

26:59

I turned my back on her. In fact,

27:01

that's right, you did what I did, my

27:04

beautiful wife. I told her she was disgusting

27:06

looking. That's what you're contractually obligated

27:09

to say. Thank you very much. King

27:11

Philip of Spain, who remember, was married

27:14

to bloody Mary, right, and after she died,

27:16

he presented himself to Elizabeth

27:18

as like a husband. Option. Oh sure, because

27:21

he's like one sister's as good as the other. The

27:23

main thing is that I want to be King of England. Yeah, I was

27:25

married to a queen. Everyone else is a step

27:27

down. It's so true. You know, we gotta moves,

27:32

at least, if not up moves. So

27:35

he had been kind of trying to court

27:37

Elizabeth himself, but he was informed

27:39

by the Spanish ambassador quote, Lord

27:43

Robert has come so much into favor

27:45

that he does whatever he likes with affairs.

27:47

And it is even said that Her Majesty

27:50

visits him in his chamber day

27:52

and night. Oh my goodness.

27:56

So people all over the kingdom

27:59

kind of all over the world. This was like an international

28:01

thing, right. We're speculating that

28:03

the queen wanted to marry Robert Dudley, and

28:06

Robert Dudley was thinking of divorcing Amy

28:08

Rob's heart, and there were rumors that Amy

28:10

was terminally ill with breast cancer and they

28:12

were just waiting for her to die. And then

28:14

there were other rumors that the cancer rumor

28:17

was totally untrue, and Robert was just spreading

28:19

that rumor, trying to make everyone think she was sick

28:21

though, so that when she died it would be less suspicious

28:25

rumors. Wow. The Spanish

28:27

ambassador was so sure that

28:30

Robert would be king one day that

28:32

he concluded his letter to King Philip

28:34

quote, it would be well to

28:36

approach Lord Robert on your Majesty's

28:39

behalf. Your Majesty would do

28:41

well to attract and confirm

28:43

him in his friendship. Damn they were really

28:45

convinced. Oh yeah. In another letter he straight up

28:47

said, no one else will be king

28:49

but Robert. Wow, this is the guy.

28:52

The Spanish ambassador was not the only person

28:54

who was certain that Robert would end up

28:56

the king consort. Elizabeth's

28:58

court thought the same thing, and they

29:00

did not like it because

29:03

Elizabeth was the unmarried

29:06

queen of a powerful country. So tons

29:09

of foreign princes were coming through

29:11

with parades and trumpets

29:13

and you know, all the moisturizer

29:16

on just trying to present

29:18

themselves as the perfect suitor.

29:21

You know, Prince Ali is here, all

29:25

all the fanfare you can imagine. But

29:27

like Jasmine, Elizabeth was like,

29:29

I am not a prize to be one.

29:32

And she turned down every

29:35

one of those suitors. And they

29:37

started getting mad and whispered that, well,

29:39

she's just not going to marry anyone

29:41

but Lord Robert, and that she was

29:43

just trying to distract everyone by pretending

29:46

to entertain their marriage proposals while

29:48

Robert worked out had to kill his

29:50

wife, damn. And

29:53

plenty of plots existed to kill Robert

29:55

too and get him out of the way. They're like, if this guy's

29:58

gone, we can finally marry this lady. So

30:00

many in fact, that Robert started wearing

30:03

a light chainmail coat under his

30:05

clothes at all times. Couldn't

30:08

get surprise stabbed in the street. He

30:10

was straight up like I need to be walking around

30:12

a bulletproof vest on mule. Well,

30:15

it all came to a head in September

30:18

fifteen sixty Amy

30:20

rob Start Dudley was in Berkshire.

30:23

She was living in the best apartments at

30:25

a relative's house called Cumnor Place

30:28

with ten servants. She's paying

30:30

her own bills, she's handling her own

30:32

business, she's buying nice dresses and so and

30:34

so forth. But the morning of the eighth

30:37

a fair was being held in Abingdon,

30:40

the nearby town, and all the servants

30:42

went to that fair, leaving Amy

30:44

alone in the house. When they

30:46

returned, they found Amy in

30:48

a heap on the floor by the stairs,

30:51

dead of a broken neck. Immediately,

30:55

the speculation and rumors began.

30:57

Sure, was it just a tragic

30:59

accident? I mean, it's certainly possible,

31:01

But a lot of people were skeptical because the flight

31:04

was only eight stairs high,

31:06

and that did not seem steep enough to cause

31:08

a fatal fall. So had

31:11

Amy been murdered so her husband

31:13

could marry the queen? And if so,

31:16

who had done the evil deed? Well,

31:19

I say that we take a look at the facts and the

31:21

suspects and decide for ourselves

31:23

once and for all. Let's crack this case wide open.

31:26

Right. If scholars who've dedicated

31:28

their entire lives to studying Queen Elizabeth

31:30

haven't figured it out yet, then we can do it in one

31:32

hour on a podcast. Yeah. So, welcome

31:35

to the Court, the

31:37

Ridiculous Romance Court. Yeah, is in session.

31:40

First, let's look at the suspects.

31:42

Obviously Robert himself.

31:45

I'm sure someone walked into the

31:47

room saw Amy at the foot

31:49

of the stairs and the first thing they said was Robert

31:51

did it? Of course. I mean they had

31:53

been speculating for a very time

31:55

that he was trying to do this well, and he

31:57

had a lot to gain from Amy's death.

32:00

Once she was out of that picture. He could become

32:02

one of the most powerful men in England

32:04

if he married the queen. People

32:07

have done far worse for less, you know, and

32:10

not just the power aspect, but he actually might

32:12

have been just as in love with Elizabeth as

32:14

she was with him. Right, Robert

32:17

wasn't with Amy at the time of her death.

32:19

He was in Windsor with the Queen, which is a

32:21

pretty solid alibi and probably a lot of witnesses.

32:25

But he could easily have arranged

32:27

someone else to act for him, right, and

32:29

one of his supporters was in Berkshire

32:32

that day. His name was Sir Richard

32:34

Verney. Amy had stayed

32:36

with him for a while after her Easter visit

32:38

to Robert at court, and theories

32:41

flew that Sir Richard had been slowly

32:44

poisoning Amy like Misha

32:46

Barton in the sixth sense, and

32:48

when the poison didn't work, he

32:51

was just like, I'll just shove down the stairs,

32:54

or at least broke her neck and placed her at

32:56

the bottom of the stairs. Right, he went over to her

32:58

house, scurry doll her servants

33:00

out to the spare, bro snapped

33:03

her nick and then just like placed her

33:05

carefully at the bottom of the stairs. Well,

33:07

let's go over the defense. Historians

33:10

are pretty skeptical that Robert

33:12

Dudley had anything to do with Amy's

33:15

death. Historians, what do they know? His

33:17

story? I've got a gut feeling after learning,

33:19

you know, a few of the facts. That's all I need,

33:22

That's all I want to know. Well,

33:25

Robert's letters, you know, after

33:27

he received a message that she had died. His letters

33:30

seemed to show a man who is fully

33:32

caught off guard. He's extremely upset,

33:34

he's very surprised by this news, and he

33:36

is desperately wanting to understand what happened.

33:39

Okay, and of course, the point

33:41

of him killing his wife would be that he

33:43

could marry the queen. But the fact

33:45

of the matter is that so many rumors

33:48

were flying around about Robert and the queen

33:50

and the nature of their relationship that if Amy

33:52

died under mysterious circumstances,

33:54

there's no way that would help them get together.

33:57

The rumors would get too insane, yea. And the

34:00

scandal was so crazy that it's pretty impossible

34:02

for them to get married. This is the kind

34:04

of thing that could destabilize Elizabeth's rule

34:07

and foment a rebellion. Okay, so

34:09

she has to be real careful. He has to be real

34:11

careful. So historians are kind of

34:13

like, this would not have led to what he wanted,

34:16

so why would you do this? And they

34:18

also find the idea of Sir Richard Verney

34:20

trying to poison Amy slowly and then

34:22

snapping her neck and everything to be pretty specious.

34:25

And I do too. It does not seem

34:27

like, yeah, so I'm like, yet

34:29

to stretch a lot that he would be like, oh, seriously

34:32

poisoning her for many months

34:38

drink hop But Robert, of

34:40

course, was far from the only

34:42

suspects. And we will go over a

34:44

few more right after this. Welcome

34:52

back to Court, where we're discovering

34:55

if Lord Robert Dudley is a murderer.

34:57

The court, the courts, the court

34:59

Court. Next on court court don't.

35:03

So we've covered Robert Dudley

35:05

and his buddy, Sir Richard Verney, but

35:07

what about Elizabeth herself.

35:10

She was the queen and she wanted to marry

35:12

her favorite boy toy, So why don't just take

35:14

matters into her own hands or a lackeys

35:17

and just kind of clear the way. I mean, how hard is it

35:19

for a queen to whisper to someone like

35:22

I don't think she should be around

35:25

anymore. Wink wink,

35:27

winky wink. It's all very house of the Dragon,

35:30

very true. Yeah, she totally got like little

35:32

Finger over. She's like, hey,

35:35

little Finger, you know what event I'd

35:37

love to attend Amy robs Out

35:39

Dudley's funeral. Yeah, that's the party.

35:41

I want to go. Real tragedy if anything were to

35:43

happen to her, But you

35:46

wouldn't know anything about that would But

35:48

the thing is, Queen Elizabeth has

35:51

pretty much the same defense that Robert has. If

35:53

she wanted to marry this guy, it couldn't

35:56

be with all these rumors flying around about them

35:58

conspiring to murder his wife together,

36:01

right and again, the ensuing scandal

36:03

made it impossible for them to marry anyway.

36:06

And Elizabeth was not stupid, like she

36:08

would have been smart enough to realize that her enemies

36:10

would use this against her. In fact,

36:13

when Mary and Queen of Scott's, her chief rival,

36:15

heard the news, she immediately responded

36:17

that Elizabeth would quote soon marry

36:20

her horse keeper. That's

36:23

actually I heard recording of Mary, Queen of Scott, that's

36:25

exactly, which sounds like, oh

36:29

what a bit I love is she's acting like

36:31

he's not also a lord like noble.

36:34

She's like she's basically

36:36

like Mary and her groom. Or she

36:38

might as well marry the horse. Oh

36:42

that's what her mother to do. Well.

36:46

Elizabeth was also notoriously

36:48

against marrying anyone. In

36:50

fact, when her third stepmother,

36:52

Catherine Howard, was executed when Elizabeth

36:55

was only eight years old, she confided

36:57

in her best see, Robert Dudley, that

36:59

she never get married. That's

37:01

right, And some people think that's why Robert

37:04

married Amy in the first place, because he knew that

37:06

he would never be able to marry Elizabeth. Although

37:08

I gotta throw out there that, I

37:11

mean, I think I said when I was eight

37:13

years old that I would never get married.

37:15

Gross girls are grit, you know. I

37:18

just think that's not really something you

37:20

would take seriously and long termed here

37:22

a child say, I feel you, But

37:24

the child of King Henry who watched

37:26

that many women. I mean, she's got

37:30

a lot of reasons to not trust that. I

37:32

feel like she would have definitely been like, you know what, this

37:34

is the third one. No way, no way

37:37

am I ever letting a man fucking be able

37:39

to swing no sword over? Yeah. I guess her

37:41

example of married

37:44

couples was not too strong. Yeah,

37:46

you're eight year old. Marriage marriage

37:49

ideas were very different from hers. Thank,

37:52

So who are you? What do you have a strong

37:54

father figure at home? Well, he's King Henry

37:57

the eighth, so a little too strong,

37:59

designed to get well.

38:01

Our next suspect is

38:03

that love match hating principal

38:05

secretary William Cecil.

38:07

Do we remember him? Who's that? William

38:09

Cecil was the guy who was at

38:12

Robert and Amy Robsart's wedding and

38:14

disparagingly called it a love match.

38:17

Oh, here's the one who vomited all over

38:19

his shirt at the idea of two people marrying

38:21

for love. Disgusting

38:26

about Well,

38:28

William Cecil was now like

38:30

a main secretary guy in Elizabeth's

38:33

court, so he had even more sway over the queen

38:35

than Robert Dale. All right. It was basically

38:38

Robert, William Cecil and Sir Francis

38:40

Walsingham who were in charge of the country

38:42

while the Elizabeth was queen. Ok.

38:44

They were her like three main dudes, and

38:48

William Cecil's had been one of

38:50

the loudest disapproving voices

38:52

at court, saying Lord Robert could

38:54

never be king, that was not an acceptable

38:57

person for her to marry, regardless

39:00

of his marriage to Amy already. He just didn't

39:02

want Robert and Elizabeth together. Yeah,

39:04

they love each other. I won't

39:07

have it. I say, this man

39:09

has too much sensibility. Now.

39:13

Once Amy Rob's Heart died, William

39:15

Cecil certainly went around town

39:18

saying, just as loudly, you know, oh,

39:21

there's all these crazy rumors going around

39:23

that Robert Dudley killed his wife.

39:25

Man, that's so wild. You think you know

39:27

a guy you know? Wow? Like, so

39:29

he's walking around definitely spilling

39:33

tea, drinking the tea, and

39:35

so he ruined the tea, he ruined the teaser.

39:38

That's so true. So William Cecil

39:40

definitely benefited the most from

39:42

the scandal that blew up around Amy Rob's

39:44

Heart's death, and that's why people were starting to be

39:46

like, maybe William Cecil had something to do with

39:48

this. Oh wow, okay, like he who smelt it, dealt

39:50

it, he who smells It's kind of what they're

39:53

saying. It's usually what we find here at the Court

39:55

of Ridiculous Romance. But his

39:57

defense is that historian feel

40:00

that William Cecil, as much as he disliked

40:02

the idea of Robert becoming king, would

40:04

never have risked Elizabeth's reputation

40:07

or his own by killing Amy robs

40:09

Hart. Okay, everybody knew

40:11

that this amount of scandal would not turn

40:13

out well for anybody close to Elizabeth,

40:16

so it would not have made sense. And William

40:19

Cecil did not really believe himself

40:21

that Amy had been murdered at all. Oh okay,

40:23

you know, he and Robert were rivals at times,

40:25

but they also worked together and they spoke

40:27

well of one another for years too. Okay,

40:30

so William Cecil was just using this scandal

40:32

to benefit himself in his career like any

40:34

good politician. Sure. Yeah,

40:37

Now another suspect

40:39

was Amy Robsert Dudley herself.

40:42

Lots of folks believe then and believe

40:45

now that Amy actually committed

40:47

suicide that day by throwing herself

40:49

down the stairs. The evidence

40:52

is actually pretty strong for this. The

40:54

day after her death, Robert

40:56

wrote to his steward, Thomas Blunt,

40:58

asking him to open an inquest to

41:01

figure out what the hell happened here? Why is

41:03

my wife dead? Thomas wrote back

41:05

that he had questioned everyone, and that

41:07

Amy had insisted that

41:09

all of her servants attend the fair

41:12

at Abingdon that day. One

41:14

of them even had refused to go. She

41:17

said it was quote no day for a

41:19

gentlewoman to go. That

41:22

makes me think she's got a little mister Carson in

41:24

her now. He was like,

41:26

frivolity. When there are shows to be

41:28

done, we could be

41:30

polishing the silva totally.

41:33

Well. After this servant refused

41:36

to go, Amy got really mad at her and was like,

41:38

you better get your ass to Abingdon. I

41:40

don't want you around this house. I need the place

41:42

to myself. I'm gonna put some music on, you

41:45

know, or relax. I don't want no peeping

41:48

eyes. That's right. Well, Thomas

41:50

concluded in his report, quote certainly,

41:53

my lord, as little while as I have been

41:55

here, the tales I do hear of her

41:57

maketh me to think she had a strange

42:00

mind in her. Scholars

42:02

today think that she was suffering

42:05

from breast cancer and depression, maybe

42:08

exacerbated by all these rumors

42:11

about her husband and the queen.

42:13

So of course she's just chilling at home and just

42:15

has to hear about all this all the time every

42:18

day. Well you know, your husband's fucking the queen

42:20

all night and she's like, okay, thanks, and

42:22

we know they were in love, right, So she definitely

42:25

would have been, I think, very sad and

42:27

maybe anxious too, because again, it's just it's

42:30

not great for the king or

42:32

queen to like or hate you too

42:34

much. Yeah, it really seems to be like a very

42:36

complicated situation. Regardless, it

42:39

seems like the best thing is if the king or queen

42:41

does not know you exist for

42:44

real, and she might be thinking that, Yeah, there's

42:47

she's got the same idea as everyone else, like any day

42:49

someone's going to try and take me out, right awful.

42:53

So they think that might have been why she

42:56

would have died by suicide

42:58

in this way. Yeah, our

43:00

final suspect is cancer,

43:03

the worst suspect of all

43:06

because the chief reason that people at

43:08

the time thought that she was murdered. Besides,

43:10

of course all these rumors about Queen Elizabeth

43:13

and Robert Dudley was that the flight

43:15

of stairs was only eight steps deep,

43:17

right, But the inquest at

43:20

the time pointed out that when she

43:22

fell, all her body weight kind of landed

43:24

on her neck, so the height of the fall

43:26

didn't really matter. It was the weight, the weight

43:29

on her neck that killed her. And then in

43:31

nineteen fifty six, a medical professor

43:33

named Ian Aird suggested that

43:35

Amy had metastatic cancerous

43:38

deposits in her spine, which

43:40

would cause the bones to break even

43:42

with limited strains. Oh wow, okay,

43:45

so it just kind of increased the fragility,

43:47

right if break would

43:50

have been possible even at that high I mean eight

43:52

steps, it really feels like I

43:54

mean, and she didn't know that about

43:56

her spine being more fragile than usual,

43:59

right, right, So it's still

44:01

weird for me to for her to think, oh,

44:03

I'll just throw myself down this very short flight

44:06

of stairs and that will definitely kill me,

44:08

right, which is why it's more than likely it was

44:11

an accident because she just fell down

44:13

the stairs and happened to have weaker bones

44:15

and died, you know, like anyone else maybe

44:17

would have been able to pick themselves up or off

44:20

the floor, but like in her case, that

44:23

wasn't possible. But then why did she send

44:25

everyone? I mean, we all want

44:27

a day at home alone. Maybe the fair was just her opportunity

44:30

to be like, please get out of here. And she

44:32

didn't know she was condemning herself at that

44:34

point, But it is so weird that she was so

44:36

insistent, like y'all need to leave. It's

44:38

one of those where, like you know, sometimes a lot of coincidences

44:41

come together and tragedy happens.

44:43

But it does look sus

44:47

as we say today, like y'all go to the fair

44:49

because I want to dance around in my underwear with

44:51

a broom, singing songs like

44:53

risky business. Yeah, And I can't

44:55

have y'all spreading rumors around

44:57

this whole kingdom, not my weird hobbies.

45:00

Right, And she whacked the floor, put her socks on,

45:02

went slid down the hallway, and stumbled

45:04

right down the stairs. I also have to

45:07

say, some stairs

45:09

from the fifteen hundred are incredibly steep.

45:11

That's even at eight stairs. The stairs

45:13

might be higher than our normal standard

45:15

stairs today. Right, So I

45:17

read or those witch stairs. Have you seen

45:20

those? Yeah, they're just incredibly, incredibly

45:22

shallow steps, they're not

45:24

uniform. Basically a staircase

45:27

made to murder somebody, but they

45:29

used it all the time. Oh, those are the murder stairs,

45:31

the murder stairs. So I don't know it is.

45:34

There's so many strange

45:36

coincidences here. Yeah, and

45:38

it could also be that Amy. I don't know this.

45:41

This doesn't necessarily work

45:43

with her character. I don't know much about her or anything,

45:45

but I'm wondering if she

45:47

knew about all these rumors, right, and they're making

45:50

a real upset and she's super mad, and

45:52

she's like, you know what, I'm

45:55

dying anyway. So I'm gonna make

45:57

it look real fucked up for them so that they

45:59

can never be together. I guess, like from

46:02

the grave revenge. Yeah, that's like down.

46:06

Oh wow, Okay, wait a second. I got

46:09

two wild theories. I'm ready, but I think

46:11

they're accurate, but speculation

46:13

station. Just to be safe, go ahead. One,

46:16

she found herself a body and

46:18

she faked her death. She pulled out her own teeth, replaced

46:21

them, put him in the put him in the

46:24

cadaver, broke its neck,

46:26

threw it down the stairs and was like, I'm out of here.

46:28

Wow, I'm sick. Yeah.

46:31

Then now she's coming in out there in the world, she's

46:34

coming in. She's living free Tuter England.

46:37

Yeah, coming in Tutor England,

46:41

in England, new on

46:44

any Well, now i'd have to be a

46:46

reality so next on Bravo. Okay,

46:49

in England. But if that's

46:52

too crazy for you, then

46:54

how about this the ghost of

46:57

Bloody Mary. Huh, that's

46:59

the problem. Amy went into the bathroom

47:02

and she was like, oh man,

47:04

you know, I'm just having such a hard time with

47:06

my husband and Queen Elizabeth

47:08

I almost with her sister was still

47:11

queen what was her name? Um, what

47:13

was it? Bloody Mary? Bloody Mary,

47:15

Yeah, Bloody Mary. And then Bloody

47:18

Mary came out of the mirror

47:21

and shoved her down the stairs. Oh my

47:23

god. Look I'm saying that's that.

47:26

Honestly, that's a more believable

47:28

theory than a lot of these. Listen, I think

47:30

Bloody marries go. Okay, So the Court

47:32

of Ridiculous Romance has found that

47:36

Bloody Mary, for bey all the Grave killed

47:38

Amy robs O Dudley, just

47:41

because that's just that's just what her ghost

47:43

does. Otherwise, she had no reason too, but that's

47:45

just how it worked. That's why I was. I mean,

47:47

I was too scared to do it as a little kid.

47:50

But I do remember thinking later it's like, oh, you

47:52

say her name three times and she appears in

47:54

the mirror. And I was like, then, what I know? Worry

47:56

what she can do? She's in the mirror. But

47:58

that's scary enough. But also I'm not challenging

48:01

Bloody Mary to show me what

48:04

she does. Can I tell you something really stupid?

48:06

I would love for you to tell me something really stupid. When

48:09

I was young, we did do Bloody

48:11

Mary like everybody and sure, I was like ten

48:13

or something, and we said Bloody

48:16

Mary three times in the mirror, but I never

48:18

opened my eyes. Yeah, and

48:20

we left the bathroom. And ever

48:23

since, I have been afraid that if I go into

48:25

the bathroom one night and

48:27

look in the mirror, she'll be there because she's just been waiting.

48:30

She's been ever since I said it. Wow.

48:32

Sometimes when I like, I have to go to the bathroom

48:34

in the middle of the night or something, and I don't turn on

48:37

the light, I keep my eyes closed while I washed,

48:41

so dumb. I know it's stupid, but I still

48:43

can't that stuff berries

48:45

in your brain. I totally get it. Still can't

48:48

damn like bloody Mary oh man, she's

48:51

waiting for you. It's so

48:53

stupid. Every time I do it, I'm like,

48:55

you were so dumb. But I can't

48:57

help it. You know, I've had plenty of nights where

48:59

I'm like, I need the lights on.

49:04

I'm a spooky night. I'm in my thirties.

49:06

But you know, ghosts,

49:09

I don't want them. I had

49:11

no interest could be out there. Yeah, I don't want

49:13

them evolved in my life. I gotta say,

49:16

I'm sitting here in a brightly lit room with

49:18

no mirrors, recording this podcast

49:20

in the middle of the day, but I said

49:22

it her name three times, and there will be a

49:24

part of my brain for the next six weeks. Right

49:27

that thinks like I'm gonna turn the lights on

49:29

in the bathroom. So I get

49:31

it. That's not that stupid. Well,

49:33

I hope that they did light as a feather, stiff as a board

49:36

to get Amy off the floor, just

49:40

around it all out. Oh,

49:43

I'm glad we solved the mystery. I am too.

49:46

You know, historians are welcome to reach out

49:48

to see how we reached our conclusion that

49:50

it's definitely bloody married ghosts coming

49:52

out the mirror. We're in speculation station. I can do

49:55

what I'm doing. That's a legal

49:57

rule. Well, regardless of the fact

49:59

that we're absolutely right and it was the ghost of Mary.

50:01

The first a jury at the time

50:04

found that Amy robs Hard Dudley's

50:06

death was accidental, just a

50:08

tragic accident. She accidentally said

50:11

bloody Mary three times in the bathroom. Okay,

50:13

so she accidentally committed

50:16

suicide. Now, of course this decision

50:19

relieved Robert somewhat, even

50:21

though he actually asked for a second trial

50:24

so that another jury, preferably

50:26

one that included Amy's brothers,

50:28

could examine the evidence. He

50:31

was like, please let John Appleyard was his name,

50:33

Please let him come and look at everything. Now,

50:36

nothing came of that request. They were like, no, we've

50:38

already done this and we've decided and that's

50:40

it. But that request

50:42

makes it really clear that Robert really

50:44

wanted to be like extra exonerated,

50:47

and that he completely understood

50:50

that no matter what a jury said one,

50:52

two or three or four times, the court

50:54

of public opinion had already decided that

50:56

he was guilty, and his reputation

50:59

was forever a kind of destroyed by

51:01

this, right right, So

51:04

you know, even though Robert and Elizabeth

51:06

were now free to marry, technically

51:08

it could never happen at this point,

51:11

but the aftermath is actually just

51:14

as fascinating as the murder mystery.

51:17

Even more damning rumors about

51:19

these two star crossed lovers started flying.

51:22

Elizabeth tried a little matchmaking

51:24

with poor results. Robert

51:26

knocked up his mistress in which created

51:29

another murky legal situation, and

51:32

when he finally did find true love again,

51:34

he had to hide her from his unofficial

51:37

girlfriend for as long as possible. This

51:40

is all crazy stuff, and we are going to

51:42

tell you all about it in the next episode.

51:45

That's right, Robert and Queen Elizabeth just

51:47

had too much going on. One

51:49

episode of ridiculous romance. Ridiculous

51:51

romance, and if

51:53

all this hadn't happened, we might not have

51:56

ridiculous romance today because of course, Robert

51:58

Dudley one of your ancestors,

52:01

that's right, which I guess,

52:03

I mean, well, we'll get more into that next

52:06

time, and we tell you all about his other

52:09

lovers and everything. Yeah, I want to know how straight

52:11

this line is, right, But he didn't have kids with

52:13

Amy, so we I know we

52:15

were not descended from the gentleman farmer

52:17

from Norfolk. Oh, I'm very incended

52:20

from another woman. A well.

52:23

I hope you're all titillated by

52:26

the potential there and join us

52:28

again next time. I'm very

52:30

excited that we did this because my

52:32

parents mentioned it the other day, my

52:35

father and mother, and they

52:37

said if we did this story, they'd finally listen to

52:39

the show. So

52:42

we have two new downloads today from

52:45

my loving parents. Wow,

52:48

we doubled our listeners, so

52:53

I hope you liked it, mom and dad. We

52:56

absolved our ancestor of murder by blaming

52:58

it on a ghost. Yes, you're well, it

53:01

is decided. Well, that's

53:04

exciting. I'm very excited

53:06

for next week's episode. I hope you all are too,

53:08

because I actually this is

53:10

Diana's episode. I don't know what happens next. Oh

53:12

my god, I can't wait to find out. I'm obsessed the

53:15

edge of my seat and I've got the lights

53:17

on in the bathroom. You know you know, how

53:19

do you? Well? I hope you loved

53:21

it as much as I did. I love a court intrigue.

53:24

There's so many different relationships in this that

53:26

are ridiculous in different ways, so it's

53:28

just a really fun one to go over. Would love to hear your

53:31

thoughts. As always, we love to hear from you

53:33

guys, anything you have to say. If

53:35

you have your own speculation station

53:37

about who murdered whom in this situation,

53:40

would love to hear it. Our email is Riddic

53:43

Romance at gmail dot com, yes, or reach

53:45

out on Instagram. Tell us if you've had

53:47

an experience with Bloody Mary, either

53:50

the queen or the ghost. Either

53:52

way you can find us I'm at

53:54

Oh great, it's Eli, I'm at Dynamite

53:57

Boom, or just mess with the show at Riddic

53:59

Romance right. We thank

54:01

you so much for spending your time with us today. We

54:03

love you so much and we'll see you soon for

54:05

the next episode. Bye bye, so

54:07

long friends, it's time to go. Thanks

54:10

for listening to our show. Tell

54:13

your friends neighbor's uncle s in dance to

54:15

listen to a show Ridiculous Roll Dance