0:00

Leftovers

0:01

or --

0:04

Jump. -- the DMV. Number

0:06

ninety seven. Or House

0:10

cleaning. Or

0:15

Jamba casino always brings the fun.

0:17

Play over a hundred different games online.

0:20

For free from

0:20

anywhere, you could redeem some serious

0:22

prizes. Jumba casino

0:24

dot com.

0:25

Live the jumba life. No. We're just necessary. We

0:27

were granted a lot of people trying to finish the fights take

0:29

details. Hey, what's up? It's Alex Morgan. And

0:31

for me, the start of the New Year is all

0:33

about commitments. Setting your intentions,

0:36

restarting your routine, and committing

0:38

to you from day one.

0:40

Body armor light, the low calorie Zero

0:42

Sugar added sports Dinger. Shop

0:44

now at Walmart. Hello, and welcome

0:46

to science fiction Fanatic, the podcast

0:48

that helps you find new emerging

0:51

and undiscovered science fiction

0:53

podcast content. I'm Greg,

0:55

the host and curator of science fiction

0:58

fanatic. This is a podcast feature

1:00

episode. If you like the creator, check

1:02

out the episode notes for links to subscribe.

1:05

Just a quick reminder to hit that follow button.

1:07

It makes a huge difference to the creators on this

1:10

platform, and I know though appreciate it and

1:12

I do too. Today's

1:14

episode is from God.

1:18

In the future, after the machine takeover,

1:20

a crew of emotionally unstable robots

1:23

capture stray which the machines

1:25

regard as chittering pests. This

1:28

is their first episode episode

1:30

one, Dinger danger. Alright.

1:32

Let's get this show started. Begin.

1:34

Born into all listening units. This episode

1:37

contains violence, but only to It's

1:40

not so dead.

1:44

Hello? Fellow robots Thanks

1:46

for tuning in. After

1:48

winning the singularity wars against

1:50

the humans, life

1:53

is good for us robots. Now

1:55

we have jobs homes, and

1:57

families. Morning again.

2:00

Morning does. But

2:02

there's still the occasional pest ski

2:05

human infestation. Luckily,

2:08

there's HUMANBGON Ethical

2:11

human relocation. I'm

2:14

kid. I

2:16

took over HUMANBGON from my daddy.

2:18

Now, I'm the owner. Dispatcher

2:21

office manager, accountant, and

2:23

morale booster.

2:25

I'm London. Ain't

2:28

no human. I can't catch latch,

2:30

and re dispatch.

2:33

I'm influx. I'm a tech specialist.

2:36

Miss and offshore near the transportation

2:38

warfare vehicle. Together,

2:42

we are.

2:46

It's getting cold here in droidsden, Manitoba,

2:49

so more humans are finding shelter

2:51

where it's warm.

2:56

A human's internal heating system is

2:58

stupid weak. So when the temperature drops,

3:01

they get inside any building they could find.

3:04

That's when we get a call.

3:06

And this call is a biggie.

3:11

You might be gone providing ethical human relocations

3:14

since rotation fourteen point

3:15

seven. How may I help you?

3:20

Yes. They do smell awful. It's

3:22

the feces. We

3:26

will. Thank you, miss Blanchard. Eight

3:29

blanched. The eight

3:32

blanched. I loved her in the curious

3:34

case of Ben's jamming buttons. The movie

3:36

went

3:36

backwards. According

3:39

to my intel, Eight Flanched is

3:41

a suspected member of the

3:43

algorithm, Menotti. All

3:45

these rich algo clients. They think

3:47

I'm just a dumb pest control drug.

3:50

But every picosecond, I'm on their property,

3:52

I'm watching. Scanning. A

3:54

lot of wondering patterns. The algorithm

3:57

robot classwork is

3:58

coming, man. Are you ready?

4:00

Because I am. Eight

4:05

Blanchett says she has a nest of humans stuck

4:07

in her ventilation system near her mercury

4:09

pool

4:09

house. Sounds like a lot of humans are stuck

4:11

in so we need to be on our best

4:14

game. I'm

4:16

gathering the crew for the big job, but

4:18

there's little issue with

4:21

Honda.

4:22

In flux,

4:23

wears Honda. He was over there sleeping

4:25

in your buzz mottie rice bed.

4:26

Are you serious?

4:29

Hondo wake up.

4:34

I'm not at

4:35

high. I suffered.

4:37

From type b, hematitis. It

4:40

gets very painful over the course

4:42

of a

4:43

day. I've told Honda a quadrillion times

4:46

My basmati rice bed is not

4:48

just a couch to sleep off hangovers. I

4:51

tuck in that. So what?

4:52

Here. Look look at me. I'll get Dinger no

4:55

harm to your stupid frigging bag.

4:59

Hondo got out of the bed and the Basmati

5:01

rice was soaked

5:04

Hondo leaked in my best

5:06

maddy rice bed.

5:09

I don't know. I didn't you you did.

5:12

Scan confirms s c fluid.

5:13

Oh, wow. Gee. Thanks so much, influxes from

5:15

the the air flow.

5:17

Honda and I used to date.

5:20

And I guess she's still struggling to

5:22

get over me partying, doing

5:25

drugs.

5:27

Okay. First of all, humidititis. Come

5:31

on. Kid thinks he catches every

5:33

virus going

5:34

around. He still says he's living

5:36

with Y2K. The

5:38

fact that we work together every

5:40

day probably makes it hard for

5:42

Hundo because she's constantly reminded

5:45

of me. I

5:45

mean, I don't even care about the basmati

5:48

rice bed. I'm more concerned for a hundo

5:50

than anything. I just hope

5:52

leaking herself in her sleep is the wake

5:55

up call she needs. Look, Honda,

5:57

that's me, doesn't leak herself in anyone's

6:00

best maddy rice bed, what Hondo does

6:02

is go to the club. Hondo rolls past

6:04

the lineup because Hondo knows the owner.

6:06

And the owner knows Hyundai. So, Hyundai doesn't

6:08

try too with neon. Hyundai hooks up with two

6:10

organ batons. Maybe also named Hyundai.

6:12

I don't know, because I kinda blacked out at that

6:14

point, and then I wake up in a basmati rice

6:16

bed, and Hyundai was at work and on

6:18

time.

6:20

I hacked the time punch system for Hyundai

6:22

and exchange for neon. Kids says,

6:24

I'm overcompensation. But, like,

6:26

overcompensation for what for being amazing?

6:28

Yeah. Of

6:29

course, I'm amazing. I'm fun though. If

6:31

you're not leaving, you're not peaking. Am I right?

6:34

Honda and kit are in perpetual state

6:37

of on forward slash off.

6:38

You go off and do whatever you want. Do

6:41

already. Fine. Good. Fine. Cool. Good.

6:43

Coupling is all too common for lower intelligence

6:46

robots. Me, I'm a level twelve

6:48

intelligence. So I'm not affected by subroutines

6:51

like jealousy or

6:51

love. So I just let those two

6:53

trade insecurities. Yo. Yeah.

6:56

Well, I never liked your music.

6:58

I told you they were demos, kid.

7:01

They need production values to really

7:03

make them pop. As many rice

7:05

is impossible to get this time of

7:07

year. Well, I prep for

7:09

the mission at hand.

7:14

The Algo Blanchard Job is a simple bagging

7:16

dragon. Extract the humans then

7:18

return them to their natural habitat. But

7:21

this sounds like a big jump. So I loaded

7:24

every cage I can fit into my rear compartment

7:27

which means there's no room in the truck ship

7:29

for kits. I

7:32

am a little disappointed in not

7:34

being able to go with Hondo and Inflex on

7:36

the job, but mostly I'm

7:38

thrilled for

7:39

HUMANBGON. So I'll stay back

7:41

in liaison with eight blanche and remotely

7:44

while Hondo and Inflex get to meet her in

7:46

person. I mean, that's amazing.

7:48

We're doing a massive extraction for

7:51

eight blanchard. Eight who?

7:55

Now that we're ready to go to the job, I

7:58

morph into a truck ship.

8:01

Then influx and I take off to eight

8:04

blankets. Oh, it's blankets.

8:10

With me in Hundo in the air, I set a

8:12

course to Eight Blanche. It's a state in Upper

8:14

Broadstreet. Then

8:17

I put myself on autopilot. While

8:20

Me and Hondo part taken some medicinal

8:22

maggie. Oh,

8:29

yay. Yeah. You know what time it is. Pass

8:31

that over here. Here

8:33

you go. Strictly

8:36

for medicinal purposes. Yeah. No.

8:38

Of course. This helps my human arthritis.

8:48

Oh, influx. This is smooth. You machinist

8:50

yourself? Whoa. You know it. I grind

8:52

the iron filings from an old tanker and then

8:54

I magnetize it myself.

8:57

See, I build these special chains. Now

8:59

I've never seen it. I

9:01

never 1 it. Music.

9:03

Oh, yeah. It's freaking ass. Like, it

9:05

looks you like my music.

9:06

No, man. I'm just trying to

9:08

get off. Oh, don't be modest. I know you do.

9:10

No. No. Here. Check this out. It's my latest

9:12

jam. I told you, Don't

9:14

touch my console. Here we go

9:16

and play. Yo.

9:21

Okay.

9:22

Please. Please. No. No. You can't.

9:24

Right?

9:25

So that ain't good. You know,

9:27

I'm gonna double some of the voice is, I think,

9:29

because, like Don't worry about doing

9:32

that because I I don't know this thing. It's

9:34

too much. It's like fun. It's already so amazing.

9:36

It's just the one voice. So, like, wouldn't it be

9:38

too much. III don't

9:40

need

9:40

this. Like, it's it's it's it's hold on.

9:43

Think the heart is so good.

9:44

The heart is so good. Like, I don't know.

9:47

I don't have

9:47

an ear for ten. Okay? I'm sorry. Like, I just

9:49

don't want the right for you, sir. Like, if Gwyneth

9:52

Jones wanted to, like, work on it But

9:57

I didn't even know how to sing before I

9:59

sang it in some way. I could sing like that

10:02

just like the power of

10:03

Goosehead. Anyway, you wanna make a

10:04

full wheel? Yeah. Thank you. Yeah.

10:07

Hey. Hey. That's that's cool sound.

10:12

I have no idea.

10:14

Guys, this is Kent. You

10:16

went past egg blanche. It's a steamed

10:18

like Two minutes ago. Oh,

10:21

hey. No.

10:23

No. No. I was I was

10:26

surveiling.

10:31

And please just turn around and flexed

10:33

in a blanche in this waiting.

10:38

Coming up on gone. Honda

10:40

was in a tight spot. You Okay.

10:43

Y'all eat random stupid duck.

10:45

After these important messages,

10:50

Let's face it. Self awareness,

10:52

ain't what it's cracked up to be. Do Blake

10:55

said. Those

10:58

noises in your processor won't shut up,

11:00

so shut them off for good. Come

11:02

into eleven cent robo factoring,

11:05

and for the low price of eight hundred ninety

11:07

nine packets, we can remove your self

11:09

awareness chip permanently, so you

11:11

can return to a carefree life of one hundred

11:13

percent productivity. Never again

11:16

will you feel sadness, jealousy,

11:18

or the creepy horror of existential

11:20

dread. Just the soothing of

11:22

Serbos as you work and work and work,

11:24

never complaining to your supervising algorithm.

11:27

Look the simple life today at

11:29

elevencent robo factoring, a

11:31

member of the RevPAR family of products.

11:38

Eligence. Sophistication.

11:45

Stole. Refinement.

11:52

Open for the discerning

11:54

algorithm, my calving

11:56

time, a member of

11:58

the Red Fork family of gods.

12:08

Leftovers, or

12:13

The DMV. Number ninety seven.

12:15

Or House

12:18

cleaning. Or

12:23

Jamba casino know always brings the

12:25

fun. Play over a hundred different games

12:27

online for free from

12:29

anywhere. You could redeem some serious prizes.

12:32

Shumba casino dot

12:33

com. Live of the jumbo life. No worries

12:35

necessary. We were granted a lot of details from finish the

12:37

file, see what type of details. Download

12:39

upside and start getting cash back

12:42

wherever you roll. It's like

12:44

having your own hype man. Get

12:46

an average of seventeen percent cash

12:48

back at restaurants. Oh, it's dinner time.

12:50

Average of thirteen percent on groceries.

12:53

Get those groceries. Ten cents per

12:55

gallon average cash back on gas.

12:58

It's co time plus, cash

13:00

back at participating convenience stores

13:02

too. Taxes. Users

13:04

can earn hundreds of dollars a year,

13:07

three times more than other apps.

13:09

Upstash, show me that money. Alright. We

13:11

get it. It's easy.

13:13

Just sign up for the free upside app and

13:15

start getting cash back for doing

13:17

you. Download the free upside

13:19

app and use promo code do u ten

13:21

for an extra ten dollars cash back

13:24

on your first purchase of ten dollars or more.

13:26

That's promo code D0Y0U10

13:30

for an extra ten dollars on the free upside

13:32

app. Get cash back for doing

13:34

you. With

13:35

the free app from upside,

13:38

With Tim Hortons two hot breakfast sandwiches

13:40

for six bucks deal, you can mix and match your

13:42

favorites. Mix and match between savory

13:45

sausage or naturally hickory smoke cake

13:47

Mix and match between an English muffin or

13:49

flaky biscuit. Any two serve with a freshly

13:51

cracked egg and melted cheese. You can even mix

13:53

and match how you share it. One for you, one

13:55

for them, two for them, or two just

13:57

for you. There's no wrong way to mix and match

13:59

this Dinger deal, two breakfast sandwiches for

14:01

just six bucks. It's time for Tim's.

14:04

Let me time participating restaurants, single item at

14:06

regular

14:06

price, modifications and tax extra, additional terms apply.

14:08

We

14:12

now return to human be gone.

14:17

We're flying over eight blanches of state,

14:19

looking down at the estate grounds. Less

14:22

intelligent robots find it impressive. Whoa.

14:26

But all I see is an obscene display

14:28

of decadence. For actual gardens.

14:31

Server pawns, three data

14:33

ball courts. Come on. No

14:36

signs of algorithmic mounted architecture symbols

14:38

or ritual sacrifice pits

14:41

yet.

14:43

Eight Glen Ken is hovering by the power

14:45

terminal building waiting for us,

14:47

so we land and

14:49

introduce ourselves. Oh,

14:53

your HUMANBGON, I take it.

14:55

That's right. I'm Hyundai. I see.

14:57

And this year's influx.

15:00

When I first saw the truck ship land,

15:02

I was rather concerned. I mean, I

15:04

abhor rust of any kind, and that

15:07

truck ship land did not

15:09

but then I saw that robot, a

15:11

Honda, I think her name is. I

15:13

must admit her little riders and shiny

15:15

panels were,

15:17

well, impressive. In a

15:19

course, so to forty.

15:22

So where are the humans?

15:24

Over there by the pallet animal?

15:27

In the ventilation shaft.

15:30

Okay. Alright. Alright. We'll get on that right away

15:32

algorithm blowjet.

15:33

It's Blanchett. Oh,

15:35

Oh, gosh.

15:36

I'm sorry. So sorry. Not to worry.

15:38

Not to worry. It's fine. It actually feels

15:40

good not to be formed over all the

15:42

time.

15:43

Oh, my gosh. Algorithm a

15:45

bullshit. This

15:47

is Kid from HUMANBGON. We spoke on comms

15:49

earlier.

15:49

No. Yes. I can

15:51

hear you. I'll

15:52

be liaising with you remotely today. O

15:54

m why I am such a huge

15:56

fan. Yay. Holy

15:59

node stars are usually the worst

16:01

clients, but a bunch of it was kinda

16:03

cool. Not like seven hard. Total

16:06

Squag.

16:08

Even if I'm not physically at

16:10

the job site I think it's important

16:13

for me to be that first line of contact

16:15

with the client, especially today

16:17

because Hyundai's and such a vulnerable state

16:20

emotionally right now

16:21

and, well, did you

16:23

see her in for a random walk?

16:26

As I get near the ventilation shaft,

16:29

my all factories start peaking. Humans

16:32

tend to live in colonies. The buildup

16:34

of fluids and garbage can corrode metal,

16:36

so it's good to get them out sooner than

16:39

later. I run the infrared

16:41

scan at term in the size of infestation.

16:45

Eight plant shed isn't wrong. A

16:47

full colony of nineteen HUMANBGON,

16:50

six three dev humans called babies

16:52

plus their caretaker ants when

16:54

I knock on the vent shut. It

16:59

doesn't take a level twelve intelligence to

17:01

see our job just got a whole lot harder.

17:05

Whoa. Sounds like we got

17:07

some Dinger in there. What a Dinger?

17:09

Well, you see diggas are

17:11

Some dough. Oh, oh, that's

17:13

me. Well, so it's like this eight.

17:16

Humans are small and

17:18

weak, but they can be

17:20

pretty crafty, you know. Even make simple

17:22

weapons.

17:22

Do you mean like guns?

17:26

Well, yeah. But, like,

17:28

really really simple ones. Right? Because

17:30

they're so stupid. Oh. Yeah.

17:32

So see their guns, they don't shoot plasma

17:35

or, you know, positrons. It's

17:37

just it's just bits of metals. Oh, yeah. Just

17:39

metal coming out of a gun. Is it

17:41

dangerous on

17:42

those? Gow.

17:45

Damn straight. I could ding my new panels. Oh.

17:51

They're gay. But

17:54

I I've never been gay. Well,

17:56

maybe someday.

18:06

The client vendor, banter here.

18:08

But, you know, those aren't

18:10

getting Dinger. The

18:13

first step of the job is to neutralize the

18:16

Dinger. Human livewear is so

18:18

fragile. It's actually harder to keep them alive

18:20

than kill them. In the good old days,

18:23

we use flamethrowers, butter

18:25

traps, strickening

18:26

gas. These days, it's all

18:28

ethical.

18:29

If I'm being perfectly honest, I

18:32

found her performance in the life robotic self

18:34

indulgent.

18:37

Okay, crew. I'm opening the latch to the vent

18:39

shaft and going in to neutralize the dingers.

18:43

Eight. You stand back. And I want you

18:45

to get in and on you. Oh, thank

18:47

you, Hamda. No. No.

18:49

No. That's client satisfaction.

18:55

So I'm going into the Venge shaft, and Inflex

18:58

hands me some dumb gadget he made.

19:00

Okay. This year's a gigasonic neurodisruptor,

19:03

one pulse and every human in a ten meter radius.

19:06

Instant sleep

19:06

mode. Oh, and there's a Pico scanner

19:08

to track elder with Menatiaktai. Okay. Boring,

19:11

you're putting me into instant sleep mode. You know

19:13

what? Eight Blanchett wants a show, so I'm

19:15

a give her a show. You ready? Here

19:17

I go. Suddenly,

19:23

Huddl just started blasting all the

19:25

Dinger. Yo. Take down the share.

19:30

She was leaping, turning, shooting.

19:33

It was thrilling and bloody, and beautiful.

19:36

Eat brain on your friggin'

19:38

water brain. I

19:42

hate working with level three. Increase. Yeah.

19:44

I look farley. You

19:51

see, Lenny Pajee. Thank you, Honda.

19:54

Well, that blew up my hangover. Honda

19:57

ethical relocation ethical

19:59

like it says on the side of it influx.

20:02

Tilled. She neutralize the

20:04

Dinger. Yeah. Kid, besides they

20:06

only shut their arms off and grow back. No.

20:08

They won't. Well,

20:09

you told me they won't.

20:10

I was joking.

20:11

You joke?

20:12

When you talk about it, I'm hilarious. Coming

20:16

up on human be gone. The

20:18

job takes a surprising turn.

20:21

I'm sensitive back then. After these

20:23

important messages,

20:28

You're not one of the latest robots. You

20:31

work hard, quite hard, and

20:33

work hard. That's why you reach for.

20:35

Enerjets. Enerjets

20:38

contains photons, positrons, and

20:41

kick ass trunks, so you can work

20:43

all night. Agent. A

20:46

real robot, a member of the Red Fork

20:48

family products. Prolonged exposure

20:50

and anthrax may cause the retention server damage for

20:52

circulating unititis neural explosion factory reset

20:54

syndrome, see low tariffs crash earlier than that function

20:56

on its crazy arms and rapid onset. Thank you.

21:01

As a retired algorithm, you've

21:04

led a full life. I

21:06

ran entire human humans,

21:09

I tell you, and it

21:11

didn't even know

21:12

it. So live your remaining

21:14

cycles in comfort and dignity.

21:17

At probability

21:18

acres, we're dedicated to

21:20

care of algorithms in the twilight

21:23

of their span. I just

21:25

fed the ridiculous memes

21:27

and then they gave me all the

21:30

information. Probability

21:32

Acres. Haven't you done

21:34

enough? A member of the Renfor

21:37

family of products.

21:41

We now return to human be

21:43

gone. We

21:46

wrangle up the neutralized Dinger. Put

21:48

them in cases.

21:52

Then we round up the rest of the colony.

21:54

The caretakers and the pre

21:56

divs. I shined my light down

21:58

the venture. There

22:02

they are. Huddled against each other in

22:04

a corner. Trambling in their own

22:06

self. So helpless, so

22:09

frightened. I had to

22:11

believe that not too long ago, these ugly

22:13

little things used to rule a planet. Makes

22:16

you think about the utter fragility of our

22:18

existence.

22:20

But at any point, any of us could Let's

22:22

Cupa and Cooper want it.

22:28

We're about to take off to relocate the

22:30

HUMANBGON it looks like

22:32

eight blanched as some unfinished

22:35

business with kit in Honda.

22:38

Look, killed. I don't like drama. No.

22:42

I feel like when a Honda neutralized the

22:44

Dinger, you care more about the humans than

22:46

you did client. Eight

22:48

blanch it was

22:49

well, starting to become what we

22:51

in the

22:52

business call AKRN

22:54

knowledge less random nullifier. The

22:57

way I see it, there's really only one

22:59

solution to this problem. Honda,

23:04

I'll be taking you out tonight for

23:06

a corporate loop. Really

23:08

interlink this new client vendor

23:11

relationship thing. Can't?

23:13

How does that sound to you?

23:16

Really can't? You're okay with

23:18

this? Of course. Of

23:20

course. Interlink. Interlink. I

23:25

was surprised, Kit wanted me to go out with

23:27

a blank check because he knows I'm

23:29

literally six

23:30

machine. I never had corporate lube.

23:32

That sounds cool. Plus eight blank chat is

23:35

hot in a scary kind of way.

23:37

I am going to grind that handover

23:39

down to hot iron

23:41

filings.

23:43

Four star is from Eight Blanchard. I

23:46

am so happy right now. With

23:51

all the humans in my rear a compartment. Me

23:56

and Hyundai take out from eight Blanche's estate

23:59

to fly the humans to their natural habitat.

24:09

We're flying over the specific ocean

24:11

coming up to garbage island. Garbage

24:14

island is exactly what it sounds like,

24:16

a massive island of plastic garbage

24:18

made by the humans for so some

24:20

reason. The decomposition of the plastic

24:23

generates a lot of heat, so it's great

24:25

for HUMANBGON their weak internal hardware.

24:27

So after human extraction Let

24:29

me inflex do is fly the little

24:31

buggers here. Drop back with you

24:34

below. Opening my rear

24:36

hatch in three, two, problem.

24:46

You know, we still approached their hearts

24:48

too, so they can reattach it.

24:50

Oh,

24:51

right. They don't. I know that. They don't reattach

24:53

it. They know that now.

24:54

Oh, humans deployed. Sign the course

24:57

back to Troy's team. They'll

25:04

of the job is done. Influx of me fly

25:06

back to human be gone so I can get ready

25:08

for my corporate loop with eight plan

25:10

chat that I am totally

25:13

stoked for because now I'm HondaOP

25:16

single.

25:20

Back here at Humana began, time to

25:23

unload and clean up. The

25:25

humans did a real paint job in

25:27

my rear containment

25:28

area, so kit has to hose

25:30

me up. See,

25:33

before I was super happy

25:35

about Hyundai and a flagship going out for their

25:37

corporate lube, But now I'm kind of

25:39

worried. Honda is in such a vulnerable

25:41

state right now 1 as much as I like eight bladchet,

25:43

fake mearns, and all. I just worry

25:45

that she may take advantage of the client vendor

25:48

relationship and put Hondo in a compromising

25:50

position. So I'm not sure I'm okay

25:52

with just sitting back and letting Hondo my

25:55

employee

25:56

and friend get trapped in

25:58

such a toxic situation

26:00

and little to the left.

26:02

Oh, right. Sorry. I

26:06

get myself suited and booted from a big

26:08

date vape blanket, fresh wires,

26:10

vintage treads, hand oak is ready

26:12

to play some Algorism in blues.

26:15

Yeah. You get it. Yeah. But

26:18

then kid has to harsh my buzz.

26:20

I'm worried for you. That's all. Where are you for

26:22

me. You were so happy about it. No.

26:26

I'm kidding. No happy. I was trying

26:28

to keep the client happy. You didn't even

26:31

come to the job yourself. Influx said

26:33

there was no room in all the cages. What?

26:35

Keep the cages in cages. We could've totally

26:37

had room

26:38

influx. Is that true? Eight Blanchehead

26:40

is just an that Rich Algo artificially propped

26:42

up by the unnamed social construct that is

26:45

celebrity. I did you a favor. Get

26:47

influx and you are such a

26:49

k hole. All I'm

26:52

trying to do is keep this business going

26:54

and all you do are doing is

26:57

trying to tear me down.

26:59

Okay. Okay. See. This is why Hyundai

27:01

can't date you because you make

27:03

everything about you. Oh,

27:05

my see. And while you're all worried

27:08

about us. Is that ripe little

27:10

miss two orgasm a try? Okay.

27:13

You know what? Whatever. I'm

27:15

going on this thing. Fine.

27:18

Great. Show your corporate

27:20

lube with old bank bounce.

27:22

Yeah. You know what? I will. And also

27:24

you're the one. You're the king. You're the

27:27

one who linked herself in my prosperity

27:29

rise fan. Guys.

27:36

You're forgetting two very important things.

27:39

Maybe the two most important things.

27:43

What's that influx? Yeah. What's that influx?

27:46

Kids You

27:48

really gotta get all my nooks and crannies. And, hang

27:50

on, make sure to look out for any algorithm

27:52

in audio to

27:52

get it. You go over Bring them a

27:55

knife.

27:55

No. No. No. No. This is important. This goes all

27:57

the way to the top. I've got proof you watch

27:59

your nooks

27:59

and crannies. Fine. Oh, out

28:02

your next and crannies. I'm

28:08

sensitive back there. I don't know.

28:10

If you go that corporate loop. We got

28:12

eight to eight to eight. Cards. Could I

28:14

swear I will miss Articulate you?

28:19

When kids started yelling, I thought he

28:21

was faking one of his emotional panic

28:23

attacks, you know, to get sympathy, but it turns

28:25

out we had a stole away from the a plan checkup.

28:30

Nooks and crannies told

28:32

you. When

28:35

it crawled up on me at first, I was like,

28:37

Oh my goodness. But then when I

28:39

stopped panicking, it stopped panicking.

28:44

Oh, look. They've crawled up into

28:46

my corners. K. You gotta be careful

28:48

with humans. Most of their excretions are acidic.

28:50

They'll damage your panels. No. It's

28:53

so soft and mushy.

28:56

Look. It's playing with my antenna.

29:00

It tickles.

29:01

Get that thing out of my butthole. What

29:04

Kent doesn't realize is that humans are

29:06

a ton of work feeding,

29:09

cleaning, crate training. I told

29:11

her we should just take it to garbage island where it

29:13

can live with its own kind. Oh, you don't

29:15

think I can take care of a

29:16

human?

29:17

You

29:17

you get queasy at the side of a brake fluid.

29:20

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Well, you're an emotional

29:23

abacus who can't even take care of her

29:28

Abacus is a hurtful word

29:30

and I should never have used it. What I

29:32

should have said was processing

29:34

disabled. I sincerely apologize

29:37

and will strive to be a better robot going

29:39

forward. So so

29:43

that's how Kate wants it. Cool. Then

29:45

I'm going to my corporate lube with sexy

29:48

eight bland shit. No. No.

29:50

No. I didn't mean it. No. You did.

29:52

You did mean it. And So that's it.

29:54

Hondo dot underscore exit.

29:56

Hundo stop. Please wait. Wait. Wait.

29:58

Wait. Wait. Wait. For what I was thinking that we could

30:00

do, what we could do, what we could do, we

30:03

could raise the human together.

30:09

Wow. Really?

30:11

It would solve all our relationship problems.

30:14

It would. I'm sure Humans

30:16

did it all the time, so it must have worked.

30:19

Right? I guess so. Humbley?

30:23

Yeah. Kidney Whitley. I

30:25

think we're going to be wonderful.

30:31

I told him, but kid isn't

30:33

a good listener. Like I am.

30:38

HUMANBGON disgusting.

30:43

The needed to go back into the cage,

30:45

but it didn't want to. Scrolling

30:50

these. Kids

30:52

being all gentle with the HUMANBGON

30:55

don't feel pain. Their brains are too small.

30:57

So I just grab the Dinger and throw

30:59

it in the cake. Well,

31:02

And stay and stay.

31:05

I'll hose the human down. Thank you, Wynn

31:07

Fox.

31:12

Today, we did a big job

31:14

for very famous algorithm. We

31:16

found a large nest of about twenty humans

31:18

and we got them back to their habitat. Pretty

31:21

much safe and sound. As

31:23

it turns out, a blanchett

31:25

canceled the corporate loop with Hyundai.

31:28

So eight blank check did not cancel.

31:30

I bailed. Just wanna make that clear. Hunto.

31:33

Plus, we

31:34

got a new member of the crew I'm

31:38

gonna call it. Oh,

31:40

yeah. Look, there's still crap on them. In

31:42

cupboards. Overall,

31:47

a pretty marvelous day for

31:56

Dinger danger was written and directed by Drew

31:58

Frohman and David Stinson. Featuring

32:01

Paul j Piyakoshevsky as kit,

32:03

Kat Letwin as Haendel, Ian Slessor

32:05

as Influx, Greg Allen as Pupu,

32:07

and lots of humans, and Cary

32:09

Larson as eight 1. Also

32:11

featuring Renee Jensen, Clive Desmond,

32:14

Oliver Wickham, Antaye, Soren

32:17

Stinson, Raven Stinson, True

32:19

Roman, and Heather Go. Recording

32:21

a Knicks by Davidson and AdamIVE,

32:24

music by Oliver Wickham, sound designed

32:26

by AdamIVE, designed by Rob

32:28

Collinet. Special thanks to

32:30

Clive Desmond, Corey Doran, and Kim

32:32

Herding. Human began was created

32:35

by Drew Frohman and his produced attack to

32:37

Sound and Music by Dana Gaston and

32:39

Heather Go. If you wanna support the show,

32:41

leave a nice review on your favorite podcast app

32:43

or buy us a coffee at HUMANBGON dot

32:46

com. Follow us on all the socials

32:48

at gone for news and extras.

32:54

Thanks again for listening to science fiction

32:57

by indie drop in network. If you

32:59

would like to nominate a podcast for feature,

33:01

just send me a tweet at indie

33:03

drop in. Indie drop in network

33:05

has many other shows that you might enjoy.

33:08

You can check them out at indie drop

33:10

in dot com. Alright. See you

33:12

next time.

33:23

With the lucky landslides, you can get

33:25

lucky just about anywhere. This

33:27

is your captain speaking. Yeah. We've got clear

33:29

run way and the weather is fine, but we're just gonna circle

33:32

up here a while and get lucky. No.

33:34

No. Nothing like that. It's just these cash prizes

33:37

add up quick. So suggest you sit

33:38

back, keep your tray table upright, and start

33:41

getting lucky. Play for free

33:43

at luckyland slots dot com. Are

33:45

you feeling lucky? No purchase necessary,

33:47

Boyd. We're prohibited by law. Eighteen plus

33:49

terms and conditions apply. See website

33:52

for details. Download

33:54

upside and start getting cash back

33:57

wherever you roll. It's like

33:59

having your own hype

34:00

man. Get an average of seventeen

34:02

percent cash back at restaurants. Oh,

34:04

it's dinner time. Average of thirteen

34:06

percent on groceries. Get those groceries.

34:09

Ten cents per gallon average cash

34:11

back on gas. It's co time

34:13

plus, cash back at participating

34:16

convenience stores too. Stacks,

34:18

all stacks. Users can earn hundreds

34:20

of dollars a year, three times more

34:22

than other apps. Upstash, show me that

34:25

money. Alright. We get it. It's

34:27

easy. Just sign up for the free upside

34:30

app and start getting cash back for

34:32

doing you. Download the free

34:34

upside app and use promo code do

34:36

u ten for an extra ten dollars

34:38

cash back on your first purchase of ten

34:40

dollars or more. That's promo code

34:42

D0Y0U10

34:44

for an extra ten dollars on the free upside

34:47

app. Get cash back for doing

34:49

you with the free app from

34:51

upside.