Episode Transcript
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for sponsoring the podcast. Hello
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that we Humans I'm wildly and you
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are listening to Six Stories, a podcast
1:55
where we hear details from individuals who
1:57
are passionate about co creating a world
1:59
where taken. care of each other is
2:01
the norm, and our guest today is
2:03
an expert at providing excellent care in
2:06
the most important ways. A 27-year-old's
2:08
single-ish bisexual-assist white female, she is
2:10
turned on by acts of service,
2:13
reciprocity, mutual care, listening, and
2:15
intentional touch, especially for therapeutic
2:17
purposes. And also toys, favorites
2:19
include her TENS care Kegel toner, which I
2:22
am so excited to hear details
2:24
about, and Womanizer, and she is
2:26
super-duper into fulfilling partners, fantasies, and
2:28
fetishes, including hopping on a Hop 66
2:31
ball naked, which now I really want to see! With
2:34
a background in nursing, she loves roleplay of
2:36
all kinds, but is especially living out medical
2:38
fetish fantasies, and is an excellent nurturing
2:40
dominant and teacher in the bedroom arts.
2:43
A freedom-loving babe who works as a legal
2:46
courtesan at Sherry's Ranch in Perump, Nevada, welcome
2:48
Camille Davis! Gosh, thank you so much
2:50
for having me. It's such a privilege to be
2:52
here, and it's a long time coming. I was
2:54
finally in town, and I thought, we really need
2:56
to get this lined up and good to go. I
2:59
am so excited to get all of your details
3:01
recorded for our guests today. Could you start off by
3:03
telling us? If you had to rate yourself on
3:05
a sexual shame-o-meter with 10 being the most full of
3:08
shame and one being not so shame-y at all, where
3:10
do you fall today? Why did you pick that number? And
3:12
tell us if there's been a shame roller coaster throughout your
3:15
lifetime. Sure, there's absolutely been a shame
3:17
roller coaster, not any hard inclines
3:19
or declines. Loop-de-loop? Sure,
3:21
why not? Or
3:23
corkscrews, or inverse, any
3:26
of that. I knew this
3:28
question was coming. I thought really hard about
3:30
it. I'm gonna use an analogy here. I
3:33
feel like we have shame the same way
3:35
that we have acute pain. That
3:38
we have acute pain so we
3:40
don't damage our tissue or damage
3:43
what we have in our body, but I feel
3:45
like we have shame so we
3:47
protect our social relationships.
3:50
So I feel like it can range from
3:52
3 to 5. I
3:54
feel that I'm very sexually open, but I do
3:57
consistently try to read the room to make
3:59
sure that... that I'm not going
4:01
into a higher number of shame. Mm, for
4:03
your own self. You got it. Are
4:06
you a three at work when you were at the ranch? I
4:09
would say so. Really? Yeah, because I'm
4:11
there in a provider role. And
4:13
as much as I would love to say, like, yes,
4:15
this is what I have, this is what I have
4:17
going on, I'm here to
4:20
help those first. That's also why people
4:22
come to me first. But
4:24
if they're open to asking me, I will
4:26
absolutely tell them, now I'm a one. And
4:29
it's dynamic. It's a spectrum. Do
4:31
you have moments of oneness or zeroness or whatever?
4:34
I know I said one to 10. But
4:37
in sessions with people, do you feel like
4:39
once you're connected or even in your private life,
4:41
like once you're connected with someone, do you have
4:43
moments where it's like, oh, right now I'm not
4:45
shame-y? Sure. Do
4:48
you feel like it does take some time to get there if
4:51
I feel safe with them and we're
4:53
connecting on a more emotional
4:55
and intellectual way and
4:57
then it gets on the more, or excuse
5:00
me, the lower end of the shame-o-meter? But
5:03
it really just depends. As long as I
5:05
feel safe and I feel like I can
5:07
express myself and they can express themselves, we're
5:10
good. We're golden. OK,
5:12
I'm thinking about your analogy. Camille is also
5:14
an expert at analogies. I really, really learn
5:17
a lot. You are someone that I can
5:19
just pepper with questions. And I really appreciate
5:21
that. And I haven't
5:23
thought of it in that way. But now I'm like,
5:25
oh, shit, I can't always feel the shame. So maybe
5:28
I'm one of those people that doesn't get the sensory
5:30
feedback. And maybe I'm like burning myself on a stove
5:32
all the time. OK, now that this is about me.
5:35
But there is also that analogy that some
5:37
people like pain. And that's totally
5:39
OK, too. That's true. Would you
5:41
say in this analogy, pain is the equivalent of
5:43
taboo? Not necessarily. OK. No.
5:45
I'm trying to understand shame and the relationship
5:48
between taboo because people are telling me that
5:50
shame creates the like,
5:52
ooh, in taboo. But
5:56
I don't know if I
5:59
experienced it. Do you? experience taboo? Like, how
6:01
do you understand it? Yeah, my
6:03
understanding of taboo is just means
6:05
out of the norm. And sometimes
6:08
within our civilization out of the norm
6:10
means bad in that
6:12
correlation. It doesn't have to be. Sometimes
6:15
taboo is wrong for certain reasons, even
6:17
in the logos aspect or
6:20
the ethos aspect. But
6:22
as long as it's safe and consensual,
6:24
and you feel like
6:26
it's a good time,
6:28
then it's fine. But if
6:30
you're going into something that's illegal,
6:32
not safe, not consensual. No
6:35
go. On this podcast, we like
6:37
legal and consensual activities. And
6:39
I feel like I could really wander in the
6:41
weeds. I know for a fact that I could wander deep
6:44
into the weeds with you and all
6:46
these things. The few best adjectives. Yeah.
6:48
So tell us what is
6:50
sex to Camille? Yeah. So when
6:52
I was looking up this definition
6:54
of sex hate, like through Google,
6:57
it just brought up whenever
6:59
you have sexual activity. And I was like, that's not
7:02
what I was looking for. Yeah.
7:04
Like, great. Even within school,
7:07
they said define this, but don't use
7:09
that word. Yeah. Within the definition. Online
7:11
dictionary. To
7:14
me, it can be a plethora of different
7:16
things. Like, we have
7:18
the adjective of oral and
7:20
oral sex. We have penetrative
7:22
sex. I also feel like
7:24
manual stimulation can get into
7:27
that sexual umbrella too. Oh, yeah.
7:29
I hope it's in line. Right.
7:31
Right. Or even dry humping.
7:33
Dry humping, dry humping. Yeah. There
7:37
is more clarity when you're naked,
7:40
but it can be done with clothes on
7:42
too, or partial clothes as well. How would
7:44
you define sex? Honestly, that's why
7:46
I'm like five years into this deep research
7:48
project, because I really thought I would like
7:50
understand it. I think there is for
7:53
me an energetic and physical
7:55
component. And it also depends on
7:57
the context in which someone's asking this question, which
8:00
I know it makes me a terror, but like whatever. But
8:02
I like to just see the different answers that people
8:04
give. So if colloquially out in the world someone's like,
8:06
hmm, sex, blah, blah, blah, like can we have sex?
8:08
I do assume that they are wanting
8:12
to put some sort of phallic object
8:14
inside of me or receive that. You know,
8:16
whether it's a cock that's attached to a
8:18
human body with a strap on or with
8:20
skin, you know, that's kind of
8:22
what I think definitionally is a lot of
8:25
what I will, my brain will jump to.
8:27
But if someone asks me this question in
8:29
the thoughtful way that I am asking people,
8:31
then I'm like, well, it's anything
8:34
that contains an agreement
8:36
to exchange erotic energy between
8:38
two people. You know, and orgasm is
8:40
not necessarily a part of that, but
8:42
it may be situations that could
8:44
lead to orgasm and are
8:46
focused on pleasure. You know,
8:49
one of my favorite guests
8:51
on here, Suzanne, taught me
8:53
about chasing pleasure, not orgasm. And
8:56
that has been kind of my true
8:58
north for sexual activity as I go
9:00
forward. Isn't that beautiful that we really should
9:02
be focusing more on the journey than
9:04
the destination? My mom always told me that
9:06
growing up too. We even had, you know, one of the, we
9:09
named all of our cars growing up. Me too.
9:11
Oh really? Yeah, yeah. So our
9:13
van, like our family van that was like the big
9:15
one that we would take if all of us were
9:18
going somewhere was named Journey because she very clearly thought
9:20
life is a journey, not just a destination. You
9:22
know, and I am a person that also
9:24
gets so excited. I love every aspect. Like
9:27
I love to have sex for hours upon
9:29
hours upon hours, but I also love coming,
9:31
but it's like coming is not at the
9:33
end of that. It's a marathon,
9:35
not a sprint. It's a marathon, not a sprint.
9:37
And my favorite way to come is by surprise,
9:39
you know? Or if someone is like
9:42
edging me and controlling my orgasm, but it's that edging
9:44
and it's the like, I don't know when I'm gonna
9:46
be allowed to come or if I'm gonna be allowed
9:48
to come that creates my orgasm. So, you
9:50
know, I think for me, sex is really
9:54
just when someone agrees
9:56
with me. And for me, the conscious part of it
9:58
is. important because
10:00
otherwise I experience it as boundary
10:02
pushing. Like when erotic energy is
10:05
thrust upon me, especially from internet strangers
10:07
who don't even take the time to
10:09
introduce themselves, step one, introduce thyself, especially if
10:11
you're reaching out to a stranger blindly and
10:13
not just with your name, tell me about you, why are
10:15
you reaching out to me? And then like if
10:17
I zoom out again, sex is
10:19
just grown up play. And
10:22
it's grown up play that I'm allowed to have. And
10:24
it doesn't have to be just for grown ups, right?
10:26
You know, of course, we're talking legal and consensual things.
10:28
And I'm not allowed to talk
10:30
to children about sex with my current credentials.
10:32
Hopefully, educators can do that out there. But
10:34
it's just for me, I think another definition
10:37
is just the most personal
10:39
play and original
10:41
creativity. It's our creative self expression.
10:43
Right. And I feel like within,
10:46
like culturally speaking definitions
10:49
on words can differ based
10:52
on region based on community based
10:54
on individual and the assumption. Exactly. And that's like
10:56
a blessing and a curse in my brain where someone said
10:58
a word and I'm like, I hear 14 different
11:00
definitions of that word. What do you mean? And sometimes
11:02
people get very annoyed if I like
11:04
try to really get detailed pinpoint it.
11:06
Yeah, I love to pinpoint stuff. And
11:08
I'm learning over the course of the
11:10
past five years how much
11:13
people, you know, they want to live in the gray
11:15
area, they want to be able to say, well, yes,
11:17
I said that, but I actually meant this. And to
11:19
me, if you throw physical erotic
11:21
interaction into the mix there, that's where
11:23
we get kind of rapey. And so
11:25
like, for me, that is not hot
11:27
or fun. And that's where I get confused about
11:30
like taboo stuff and kind of figuring out the
11:32
like, like where it's
11:34
like, Oh, it's so naughty. But
11:36
I'm like, but do you actually feel bad?
11:38
And sometimes people do and sometimes they don't and
11:40
sometimes they only feel bad when
11:42
I'm like, wait, but do you really feel
11:45
bad? And I'm like, well, I didn't but
11:47
now that you pointed it out. Right, right.
11:49
And having that blatant conversation, like I absolutely
11:51
understand can be scary for those
11:53
engaged in that conversation of giving or
11:55
receiving this topic of as
11:58
long as we're clear on everything.
12:00
I feel like it makes it even better.
12:03
So much better. It creates safety and
12:05
trust and a clear container. Absolutely.
12:07
That's what it is. Sex to
12:09
me is we draw
12:11
a really clear circle, I love
12:13
circles. It could be any shape. It doesn't have
12:15
to be a perfect circle. It could be a
12:17
wiggly circle. It's a clear container where I know
12:19
how I'm allowed to play inside of it. Right.
12:22
And that's so hot to me and so fun
12:24
because I feel like a Tasmanian sex devil that
12:26
just needs permission to like write a
12:28
letter. I'm visualizing this as we're on
12:30
a farm and it has a circle gate and
12:33
it's like, okay, these are the rules of it
12:35
and just have fun. Have fun. I think about
12:37
the grown up playground, like a jungle. I'm like,
12:39
do you want to do jungle gym today? No,
12:41
you won't do sandbox. You want to do jungle
12:43
gym, sandbox and jungle gym again. You want to
12:45
go down the slide? The tunnel slide. Up the
12:47
slide, down the slide and back up. Yeah.
12:51
The agreement is a huge part of it for
12:53
me, you know, and even in a recent experience
12:55
where I had a crush that wanted to fuck
12:57
me with their partner and I had a big
12:59
crush on them and I didn't know until
13:01
they were like, do you want to have sex
13:04
with us? And I was like, yeah, you know.
13:06
And so it's like, I need that kind of
13:08
specific element and I'm learning how many people quote
13:10
unquote don't need it. I'm doing bunny quotes, air quotes,
13:13
but it creates a hot container. Once it is there,
13:15
hot stuff can happen inside of it, but I don't
13:17
want to be in a situation where the next morning
13:19
they're like, oh no, no, thank you.
13:21
Perhaps you can relate, but when I
13:23
feel anxious, I research
13:26
and I want to get the data and I want to
13:28
have a clear answer to have
13:32
a better understanding of how I should process
13:34
things and go from there. And
13:36
when there's a clear answer, either
13:38
through me asking or data that
13:40
I've collected relationally or within the
13:43
situation, it's even
13:45
better because now I have a clear answer.
13:48
I do connect with people through information. This is
13:50
one thing that I have learned about my
13:52
brain over the past several years is it's
13:54
not so much the like unspoken social signals.
13:56
I don't really pick up on those, but
13:58
informational stuff, whether I you said it's
14:00
about a specific person and that's why I
14:02
love to ask people new versions of the
14:05
same questions over and over again, you know,
14:07
because that's how I'm gathering research which brings
14:09
me to what is sexy to you. We
14:11
talked about sex, but what is sexy? Reciprocity.
14:15
In terms of energy
14:18
or say, acts of service,
14:20
to me, acts
14:22
of service speaks louder than,
14:25
let's say, words of affirmation because
14:27
it's concrete, the action has been done
14:30
either in a positive or a negative
14:32
way. And let's say in terms
14:34
of working at the ranch, as
14:37
long as you let me know what you're looking for, I
14:40
can get that going. But if you're
14:42
showing me in the form
14:44
of energy of either money
14:46
and that's a type of topic in itself too.
14:48
But before I go down that rabbit hole too,
14:51
reciprocity. And sometimes that's even just a
14:53
listening ear. I do
14:55
feel, I mean, I don't mean to pat myself
14:57
on the back here. Do pat yourself. I'm here.
14:59
Okay, you can say it and then I'll ask
15:01
you. I
15:04
do feel like I'm a good listener. Camille
15:06
is an excellent listener. Camille has listened to
15:08
me talk a lot. But
15:11
I love it. And you love it. Maybe
15:15
that's what I miss, or
15:18
perhaps I don't always get back is the
15:21
reciprocity of now it's time to talk
15:23
about me or my life that it's
15:25
kind of thrown out the window
15:27
or not shown the same care. It's not
15:30
a whole negative that it makes
15:32
me turn a 180. But it does have that
15:34
realization for me of, oh, dot
15:37
dot dot. To me, it feels like
15:39
a lack of fullness in the relationship.
15:42
And while I do really, really, really
15:44
love providing safe spaces where
15:46
people can discover themselves. And
15:48
like I often have the experience where my
15:50
reflections and I suspect you have the same
15:53
thing will spark something in someone.
15:55
And oftentimes I understand, right? Like I understand
15:57
that that spark can feel so yummy and juicy
15:59
and so. especially if it's new,
16:01
it's easy to get swept up and forget that there's
16:03
like a person they're facilitating that
16:05
experience, you know. And I would also imagine
16:08
like context matters. People relate differently depending
16:10
on the type of relationship they're expecting.
16:12
I know like even as a podcaster,
16:14
I love like
16:16
going deep with people and receiving and
16:18
then I'm still trying to figure
16:20
out how to turn parasocial
16:22
relationships or like one off work
16:24
situations into deeper friendships because it's like, well,
16:27
it does have to go both ways. And
16:29
sometimes people can't provide something because we all
16:31
are where we are in our own journey.
16:34
So, right. I get that tango.
16:36
Sometimes three or four. Yeah. Sometimes
16:39
you just need a whole big dance party. I'm
16:42
imagining like a big ball mixed with a circle
16:44
jerk, you know, where like there's the people on
16:46
the inside and the people on the outside. And
16:48
it's like we do the like dancing. I don't
16:50
know how to dance, but like the formal dancing
16:52
and then it's like the bell goes off and
16:54
then we're like fucking for a little bit and
16:56
then the bell goes off again. And then you
16:58
switch partners and you're dancing again. That could be
17:00
very fun. And we can have dance cards. Yeah.
17:03
Oh, literal dance cards. Yeah. Sorry,
17:05
mine's so full. But you can join my
17:07
puppy pile later. That one's open. So
17:12
back to the idea of what is
17:14
sexy for Camille and the idea of
17:16
reciprocity, I really relate to acts of
17:19
service. I also like them when combined
17:21
with words. What about physical touch for
17:24
you? Is that part of it? Like, is it visual
17:26
things? Like if we're on the topic
17:28
of reciprocity here, I do feel that
17:30
I have, I call it
17:32
touch with intent. We were taught
17:34
this in nursing school and prior to
17:36
nursing school, I was not a hugger. I
17:39
was not a toucher. And they taught
17:41
us about therapeutic touch and how
17:43
it doesn't have to be, you
17:46
know, it absolutely is not inappropriate or anything
17:48
like that. It does
17:50
add a layer of emotional
17:54
complexity saying if
17:56
a patient had a grim diagnosis
17:59
or a bad day or
18:01
otherwise that is okay and
18:03
it is healing to reach out and
18:06
say on the shoulder saying I'm
18:08
really sorry to hear that. Nowadays
18:10
especially post-pandemic touches aren't,
18:13
we saw a lot of touch starved people after
18:16
the pandemic during the pandemic and
18:19
I decided to take that out
18:22
into my cortisone work from
18:24
a nursing perspective and
18:27
I was seeing people
18:29
open up in ways that they
18:31
probably wouldn't have before. I mean
18:33
granted perhaps our clothes are off
18:35
but there is that touch with intent
18:38
and when that is flipped on me
18:40
so here we are back at reciprocity.
18:42
If that's flipped back on me it
18:45
could even be like a touch on the forehead
18:47
or there's not
18:50
the absolute intent
18:52
of it's sexual. Yes Camille
18:54
is the person who recently put into my
18:56
brain the idea of intimate touch
18:59
versus sexual touch and
19:02
it's something that I don't think I had
19:04
drawn a clear distinction before because I'm a
19:06
touchy person. My whole life I've been trying
19:08
to touch people less. I mean I come
19:11
from a very touch heavy family in sweet
19:13
normal ways like I'll give my sister tickles on
19:15
the arm or scratches or whatever and I love
19:18
giving people scratches and in high school
19:20
my best friend would sit on my lap. My
19:22
mom started to think I was a lesbian because I would always
19:24
just cuddle my girlfriends but I
19:26
didn't know I was queer yet and
19:29
as an adult especially once I started
19:31
doing sex related work first podcasting and
19:33
now my whole exploration of the horarchy
19:35
it's so great it's so great but
19:37
I'm even more self-conscious about touch
19:40
and I don't know
19:42
if I always know my intentions other than wanting
19:44
to make people feel good and so so now
19:46
I kind of err on the side of
19:48
like not touching people until I have clear
19:50
explicit permission. When do you feel able
19:53
to initiate intentional touch? Like what are
19:55
some ways that perhaps aren't sexual as
19:57
of getting away from the reciprocity but
19:59
maybe that's the big of initiation of
20:01
reciprocity is leading by example? I don't
20:03
know. I'd like to hear how you think of it.
20:05
Yeah, I have been told many times in my life
20:07
that I'm the silent leader and when
20:11
people see what you're doing is making
20:13
them feel good or giving them a
20:16
purpose, they want to do that outward.
20:18
Maybe not to you, maybe for the
20:20
community or otherwise, but if
20:22
it's in a sexual nature and it's
20:24
been flipped upon me, I'm just like,
20:26
oh, yeah, yeah, thank you. Thank you. Oh, you
20:28
saw it. That's
20:31
so hot. Do you have any specific
20:34
examples? Like, does it all just depend
20:36
or are there specific places on your
20:38
body that like especially love receiving physical
20:40
touch, assuming that it's intentional, assuming that
20:42
it's invited? Right, so oxytocin,
20:45
that's the touch hormone, and it's
20:47
one that we don't get a whole
20:49
lot of because in our society, we're
20:52
not very touchy. We're not, we might
20:54
handshake maybe. I feel
20:57
like it's starting to be implemented back
20:59
post pandemic here, but that really
21:01
caused an avoidance for everything. And I
21:04
had to learn about that too. Like, I
21:06
started as a Corazon
21:08
in August of 2021. And
21:11
so we were still wearing masks at the time. And
21:14
I came from the hospital working
21:17
the pandemic where it was no
21:19
touch, hand wash, six
21:21
feet apart. But
21:24
then being at the ranch,
21:26
I had this new uncharted waters
21:28
that I could explore on what
21:30
made me feel good. Again,
21:33
making others feel good again. I
21:35
found that my calves very
21:38
sensitive. In what way? It's like, is
21:40
it like soft touch, firm touch, all
21:43
of it? Yeah, it can just depend.
21:45
Sometimes light touch can be a little bit
21:47
too light and it gets a little too tickly. But
21:50
if there's that just that touch with intent,
21:52
like maybe it can be in the
21:54
form of a massage, my calves have
21:57
always been tense, always. And
21:59
also when and things are getting a little
22:01
spicy, my legs will lock up and
22:03
I'll point my toes and I'll shorten the muscle
22:05
fibers there and I always need to stretch
22:08
them out. Yes, same. Perhaps that makes it
22:10
more sensitive than if it's maybe a little
22:12
sore or what have you. That's a great
22:14
place to get things going, you know, rev
22:16
up that engine a little bit. But
22:20
also like all the way down the
22:22
back too, like towards the spine. I
22:24
also like to explain
22:26
to people like what dermatomes are.
22:28
What is a dermatome? It'd
22:31
be easier with a chart, but it's
22:33
our nerve endings that stem from our
22:35
spinal cord. So we
22:37
have dermatomes, you know, one
22:40
through however many and those will talk
22:42
to different nerves and
22:44
muscles within our body. So
22:47
say if we have somebody with a
22:49
P7 injury, we're
22:52
starting to look at the dermatomes.
22:54
What's a P7? A vertebrae thoracic
22:56
seven. Okay. So sorry. You're
22:58
good. It's my job to ask the questions.
23:01
We're gonna be looking at the dermatome
23:03
chart and seeing if that's going to
23:06
sustain an injury such as paralysis or
23:08
nerve damage with an
23:10
associated body part, such as the
23:13
higher up a spinal injury
23:15
is, the higher
23:18
up it's gonna potentially
23:20
mess things up with like
23:23
if you have a cervical injury, all
23:25
the way down can have some
23:28
complications of either loss of sensation,
23:30
loss of movement. So
23:33
dermatomes, they also go on our
23:35
fingertips as well. And
23:37
I love having people play with my
23:40
hands, fingertips, or when
23:42
I'm touching them and I get to feel their skin.
23:46
Back of the neck is also a great country. Oh
23:48
yeah, back of the neck. I love
23:50
touching people's faces with my fingertips.
23:53
Like there's something so intimate about it. And
23:55
I think you'll put the word intimate into
23:57
my brain around touch. So now it's like front of
23:59
focus. And I just love,
24:02
especially if I'm in a situation
24:04
where someone, I mean don't get me
24:06
wrong, I love to just get straight to fucking
24:08
and like I love intensity. Oh sure, absolutely. But
24:10
also when I do have the time, when someone
24:12
wants to spend the time when I find a
24:15
fellow fucker, lover, whatever, who wants to like have
24:17
those hours long sessions, that's
24:19
when I'm like, oh, every little
24:21
sensation. Life is
24:23
a buffet. Why does this well have a
24:25
little bit of everything on that floor? I love that. I
24:28
want to have the Schmorgasbord. I always pick sampler
24:30
platters too. I mean, that's also like why I'm
24:32
doing the whole bucket list novelty seeking and
24:34
also just talking to the one condom
24:37
people recently. I'm like, oh my God, I gotta line up
24:39
a bunch of cocks and play with them. I don't know. I
24:42
don't know. I don't make the rules, but it sounds like you
24:44
have to. But
24:46
could you make the rules and then I would? Sure. Right?
24:49
So sexiness wise, is there anything else to say? We
24:51
talked about reciprocity. We talked a little bit about
24:54
physical. What about like the mental component? Maybe recruiting
24:56
the visual? Oh sure. I don't know.
24:58
Our number one sexual organ I feel is
25:01
our brain. If I
25:03
can, here we go back to reciprocity.
25:06
If I taught you something and you
25:08
teach me something back, oh my gosh. I
25:11
love learning. Oh my gosh. I love learning.
25:13
I always feel that if I didn't learn
25:15
something new today, I might as well be
25:17
dead. Truly. Even if it's
25:19
just a small thing of, oh, that's
25:21
how they pour concrete. That's
25:24
how you burn toast. I
25:27
am always amazed by how many things I continue to
25:29
learn every day about sex too. Just
25:32
because that is my topic of focus. Yeah,
25:34
it's your passion. It's my passion. That's my
25:36
little passion. I think it's all of our
25:38
literal passions, regardless of
25:40
our relationship. It can be our passion. Oh
25:44
absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. That
25:46
psychologically, even logically,
25:48
emotionally, intimately
25:50
brain stuff. I
25:52
started out in neuro trauma, so
25:54
brain is my thing. Understanding
25:58
the physical parts, but also understanding. the
26:00
workings inside, the emotional
26:02
things that come from
26:04
sex or the intimate things that
26:06
come from or what have
26:09
you, everything gets done back from the brain because it
26:11
is us. It can
26:13
be all sorts of things. It can just
26:15
be a hunk of tissue, but also it
26:18
could be the object that powers earth. What?
26:21
Well, civilization. Oh, oh, the power of... Civilization.
26:25
I think we should say, yeah. Yeah.
26:28
What I'm hearing in your responses
26:31
are it really seems relational for
26:33
you, a context of whatever is
26:35
sexy seems important. Oh, absolutely.
26:38
Absolutely. Like, I'd like to
26:40
think of it as a triangle. So
26:42
it has this, my foundation
26:45
would be there is an intimate
26:47
connection. We've had time to talk.
26:49
We've had time to understand what you
26:52
like, what I like, what you might
26:54
not like, what I might not like either
26:56
because those are important conversations. I
26:58
love that we have to talk, touch upon
27:01
those important factors because now
27:03
I can paint a picture of
27:05
an experience that we're both going
27:07
to have together that is sexy
27:10
and that can have different definitions
27:12
for different people. And as
27:14
long as I know your definition and it
27:17
aligns with the definition of
27:19
mine, we're golden. It's
27:21
at least an exploration, right? Because it's like, we don't always
27:23
know what we're going to find, especially in a scenario that's
27:26
new. Mm hmm. Lovers, this
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Bluechoo for sponsoring the podcast. I'm
29:26
dying to ask you about the bouncy ball.
29:29
I know that this is kind of out of order,
29:31
but was that sexy for you?
29:34
And also, did you get erotic stimulation from it? What
29:36
is the bouncy ball like, and what was it like
29:38
to have someone be like, this is sexy for me?
29:41
Right. I was a rather new courtesan, and
29:43
I received an email from a potential
29:45
client. He has been here before, and
29:48
he said that his thing is to
29:51
hop on a hop-6-6 ball. So
29:55
he likes to hop on it. No, no, he likes
29:57
the lady to hop on it. Yeah, excuse me. And
30:01
I was like, okay. And
30:03
especially with my noonness as
30:05
a Corazon, I felt like I'm
30:08
given this opportunity, why shouldn't I try
30:10
it? I don't think I
30:13
would have any other instance in my civilian
30:15
life that this would pop up. And
30:17
this was kind of given to me in my
30:19
life. It's like, I feel like I should always
30:21
give something a try three
30:24
times to figure out if I like it. And
30:27
he wanted me naked on this
30:30
hop 66 ball, and he
30:32
wanted me to hop on it. I
30:34
was in my room and I was just hopping along. I
30:36
would go back and forth, and sometimes I would do
30:38
360s, and
30:41
I'd face one way and face the other way.
30:43
I'd make eye contact. And
30:45
I did get a little bit of
30:47
stimulation, like sitting there with the handle
30:49
between my legs, and I would
30:51
just hop, hop, hop, and he wanted me to
30:53
go higher, and I went higher. And then he'd
30:55
want me to go a little bit lower. We
30:57
can do that. Can I tell you? Yeah. Oh,
31:00
I love it. There's a little bit of coaching
31:02
there, but he let me know what he wanted,
31:04
which is so sexy. I wanna
31:07
film that in slow-mo, or do I wanna
31:09
be hopping on it in slow-mo? I wanna
31:11
do it outside. How did you know it was
31:13
clean? Did you like alcohol? Oh, he was
31:15
so kind. He brought his own wipes, and
31:17
whenever it would touch the floor
31:19
or the handle would go in one
31:21
direction, touch the floor, we would disinfect
31:23
it. And I thought, wow,
31:26
we've got safety. We're consensual here.
31:28
We're having fun. This is
31:30
wonderful. I wanna update our
31:33
dance fantasy, and now
31:35
the inside people are all on hop 66 balls.
31:38
Right, right, right. They're like,
31:40
can they be open to drop? Oh, they're right.
31:42
And he's in a view, Peter, and every time
31:44
it's a whole lot of fun. That's so cool.
31:46
He'll bring the hop 66 ball
31:49
inside his backpack, and when-
31:52
Deflated. Right, right, exactly. And
31:55
when it's time to get going, he'll inflate it
31:57
with a foot pump, and he's so
31:59
kind. every time it goes
32:01
through any sort of steps, it gets disinfected. That's
32:05
amazing. Isn't it quite cool? That's so cool. I
32:07
think also just like, what is sexy to me
32:09
is people knowing what they like. You know, exactly,
32:11
I'm like, wow. And people
32:14
may be like me, I don't know exactly, I
32:16
don't know everything I like. I know I like
32:18
a lot of stuff and I know I'm curious
32:20
and that kind of like openness and the willingness
32:22
to explore and the willingness to discover, like discovery
32:24
in real time with another person is so sexy.
32:26
And that's attractive too, because
32:28
I also have that thought where
32:31
it's like, I don't think I found it yet,
32:33
but when I see people and
32:35
they have found it, whatever
32:37
it is, I think,
32:40
wow, that is so wonderful. I'm so
32:42
happy for you. You know what you want. Thank
32:44
you for bringing me on this adventure. Yeah.
32:47
Sexier otherwise. I fucking
32:49
love that. Would you tell
32:51
us what was your sex ed like
32:53
and then what was your experience as
32:55
a person who does educate people in
32:58
various ways, in the like? Yeah, so
33:00
I grew up in Arizona and
33:03
there within the legislation, it is
33:05
absence only sexual education. And
33:08
if we're all right for story time right now, I
33:10
remember that there was a time where
33:12
we were given this absence only curriculum,
33:15
we had a portion where we could
33:17
write an anonymous question to the instructor
33:20
and it would be answered in front of the
33:22
class. Because if you had a question, others
33:24
probably did as well. And I
33:27
absolutely know the answer now, but
33:30
I had just learned these
33:32
terms of masturbation and oral
33:34
sex. And now I
33:36
know they are different things. I
33:39
had asked them in question form,
33:42
is oral sex the same as masturbation? And
33:45
they saw my paper, they
33:47
had it in this little soldier, they pulled it out,
33:49
read it to themselves. And
33:52
they just looked up at the
33:54
class and said, so we
33:56
have this question here and it says
33:58
that it is black. link the
34:01
same as masturbation. And
34:04
my question was not answered. They told me
34:06
to go talk to a trusted
34:08
adult. And foundationally, my
34:10
parents are awesome. They were the ones
34:13
who taught me about sex ed. I
34:15
come from a medical background. And
34:18
they were very open with if I
34:20
had any questions, it wasn't frills
34:23
or anything like that. And that
34:26
fired up within me as like, I
34:28
have questions, I have questions that's not
34:30
being answered. So I'm going to go
34:32
find it elsewhere. In the form
34:34
of the internet. Which I feel like a
34:37
lot of us did because we had questions.
34:40
So growing up within
34:43
the school setting, I feel like it
34:45
could have been a lot better. And I do see
34:47
this often at
34:49
the ranch where people have these misunderstandings,
34:52
not from their own faults, but just
34:54
from the fault of their community that
34:56
they don't have these, I
34:58
would say fundamental understandings of things in terms
35:01
of safety in terms of what consent is,
35:03
what respect is, what responsibility
35:05
is, sexually, or
35:07
even in a relationship. Or even other
35:10
body works. Oh, our body, our minds,
35:12
their hearts, like the concert of all
35:14
of those things. Yeah. If you're a virgin, I
35:16
love to have a little hands on show and
35:18
tell everybody gets a little anatomy lesson. Don't you
35:20
wish we all had that kind of training from
35:22
someone who's older and wiser? I mean, some of
35:24
the best stories I've heard about first experiences are
35:27
from people who had an older, wiser person show
35:29
them things, which it's interesting to
35:31
note that penis owners often are very, very
35:33
enthusiastic about like, oh, this older woman showed
35:35
me something. Whereas like the reverse, when we
35:37
have a younger woman with an older man,
35:39
there is some even though it's very normal,
35:41
there's some sort of like, oh,
35:44
I don't know, like a little shame vibes to it
35:46
sometimes. But I love that. Okay, so show and tell
35:48
hands on. Yeah, yeah. And I one of
35:50
my favorite activities is
35:52
fingering. And we do it
35:54
in the same way, either they're wearing
35:56
gloves or little finger condoms. I have
35:59
them insert a finger or two inside me and
36:01
we get to explore around a little bit. And
36:04
within that exploration I like to show
36:06
them where my G-spot is. And I
36:08
tell them that the G-spot is also
36:11
the urethral sheath because it is the
36:13
back door, so to speak, on
36:16
where your urethra is. If you're going up,
36:18
that's where the urethra is. And
36:21
within a lot of stimulation of that,
36:23
a lady can lose control for bladder,
36:26
which can cause squirt. Now
36:28
if you're having such a great
36:31
time that you're losing
36:33
control of your bladder, or
36:35
if you pee during sex, great!
36:37
That means you're having a good time.
36:39
Well, not a full,
36:41
like, hard rule that
36:44
that's a good time. But I feel like
36:46
as long as people know what's going on,
36:48
it's totally okay. But I do like to
36:50
let them know that that's what it is.
36:52
It's not just this magical fluid
36:54
that comes, I mean there is
36:56
a skein splat, and that can produce a little bit.
36:58
A little bit. A little bit.
37:01
But the big gushes you see in porn,
37:03
not this magical glitter fluid. Yeah, yeah. And
37:05
my understanding is that it's not coming out
37:08
of the urethra, it's coming through the sponge?
37:10
Both. Yeah. Both. Okay. So
37:13
with me, if there's a lot of
37:15
G-spot stimulation, I will straight up lose
37:17
control of my bladder. And then
37:19
it just, it gets everywhere. And that's
37:21
totally fine. But I just want to
37:23
let them know that that's where we're headed, that's what it
37:26
is. And if you're not okay with that, let's try something
37:28
else. Oh my gosh, that's so fun. Has
37:30
that ever, like, influenced a
37:33
negotiation in some direction for you?
37:35
Yeah, yeah. That if
37:37
they're looking for squirting, or if
37:39
they're looking for manual stimulation on
37:42
me, I will let
37:44
them know what's working for me and what's not working
37:46
for me. And quick shout out here that
37:48
our days at the ranch would be far
37:50
too long if we didn't get to enjoy ourselves
37:52
too. So
37:55
we get to enjoy ourselves, but I'm very vocal on
37:57
what's working for me and what's not. I
38:00
need to let them know that when I need to
38:02
be hydrated, I
38:04
need to make sure that that's going on. I
38:07
also need to make sure that their fingernails
38:09
are in proper condition. Yeah, very important. And
38:13
that if this happens, that's what it
38:15
is. And I can
38:17
only count on a couple
38:19
of fingers on where that's backpedaled of like,
38:21
oh, no, that's here and that's not what
38:24
I want. But otherwise, people are
38:26
pretty gung ho. I was gonna say,
38:28
also, like golden showers are a thing not
38:30
even a golden shower, but any sort of like pea
38:33
play. It's very much a thing. Are
38:35
there any other common gaps? You notice insects
38:37
add maybe through the work you do at
38:39
the ranch? Oh, sure, sure. Not that it
38:41
happens all too often, but sometimes once
38:44
in a blue moon, there are those
38:46
who are really not listening to the rules. I
38:49
will always sit down and have
38:51
a conversation with people. I call it the safety chat. They've
38:54
had a gentle check, they've booked, they've had
38:56
their shower. I tell them, you can meet
38:58
me out here in the Mahabal safety chat.
39:00
And that's just explaining what
39:03
their boundaries are and what my boundaries
39:05
are. If they're allergic to latex, if
39:08
they're allergic to almonds. Or
39:10
for that almond play. They never. Sometimes
39:14
there's an almond derivative in lubes. So
39:17
I make sure that there's no like topical
39:19
allergies or anything like that. But
39:21
if they're not assuring to
39:23
the rules that we've had in place,
39:26
I like to think that there's a three strikes and
39:29
you're out. There's always a gentle
39:31
reminder, a firmer reminder,
39:33
and then you're out of there. That's
39:36
happened very, very rarely,
39:38
thankfully. But then I have
39:41
to reflect over on, did they
39:43
get any education on what these
39:45
respectful boundaries are? Or
39:47
are they just a boundary pusher? Right, right.
39:50
Which exists. That exists. But some people have
39:52
turned on what I've learned in some strange
39:54
ways. Or
39:56
in terms of these gaps, sometimes
39:58
it's just basic anatomy. or
40:01
seeing a vulva for the first time
40:03
of, we
40:05
come in all different shapes and
40:07
sizes and colors, and they're all
40:09
beautiful, same with penises. In
40:11
terms of the penis, different shapes
40:14
and sizes and colors,
40:16
they're all okay. I've seen
40:19
penises where they have a 90 degree bend in them. And
40:22
they do- I would play with that. Oh, what were you
40:24
gonna say? No, no, you play with it in an angle.
40:26
Good answer. Good answer.
40:29
Because of the sexes, I feel it's an angles
40:31
and rhythm game if we're
40:33
getting in terms of the
40:36
grind. Yeah, yeah. And
40:38
since my anatomy differs from different
40:40
people and their anatomy differs from
40:42
different people, you just
40:44
have to figure out this dance of what
40:46
works for you both, and that's what
40:49
makes it delicious. Every time is that
40:51
learning process. Isn't it neat? Oh,
40:54
cool. So I'm gonna find different positions.
40:56
We're gonna find different touches. We're gonna
40:58
find different sensations to play around with. What
41:02
about in the genital inspection? Have you
41:04
encountered maybe things you wish people knew
41:06
in the course of that part of
41:08
the process? Absolutely. I do
41:10
see it in cultures
41:12
where maybe they just didn't talk
41:15
about genital hygiene, say
41:17
those who are uncircumcised, maybe they
41:19
just weren't taught to push that
41:21
foreskin back and clean with
41:23
soap and water before pushing it back down. And
41:26
there have been a couple of times, more
41:28
than a couple of times, where
41:31
during the inspection retract the
41:33
foreskin and there's a yeast infection.
41:37
And I take it as a
41:40
moment for education that
41:42
this is a learning opportunity, that we
41:44
did have a negotiation we're about to book.
41:47
I'm a little bummed, but also this is
41:49
a learning opportunity that when
41:51
I see white specks all over the
41:53
head of the penis, that
41:57
might need a doctor's help here. And
42:00
also, washer
42:03
soap and water. But
42:05
maybe they just weren't told that. I
42:08
can't just assume that they're a dirty individual.
42:10
They were very respectful throughout the entire process
42:12
and it was just a
42:14
surprise. Absolutely. If someone's going all the way
42:16
there and going to that level of effort,
42:19
it's not like they're, I
42:21
would imagine, they're like hoodwinkie or anything. They're
42:23
like show off at, you know. And
42:26
I feel like it is not the time to invoke
42:28
shame or embarrassment. The process of getting
42:30
into the brothel is already scary enough.
42:34
So this is a learning opportunity,
42:36
totally fine. And maybe
42:38
they'll take that information out into the world
42:41
and they'll act a bit afraid. Exactly,
42:43
exactly. Probably not. But like
42:46
maybe, yeah. Or maybe they've never seen
42:48
what jock itch looks like and
42:50
they were sitting in the hot car all
42:53
day and whoop. What
42:55
does it look like? Maybe you don't know. Yeah. To
42:58
me, it looks like a shadow. It's
43:01
very prominent in the lines that it's
43:03
red or darker in color than the
43:05
usual skin tone and
43:08
it'll stem from the inner thigh
43:10
and the crotch area and kind
43:12
of radiate down. It almost looks
43:14
like a shell, like
43:16
a seashell that goes down the
43:18
legs with prominent outlines. That's a
43:21
fungal, right? Yeah. Yep. It's
43:24
also candida. It's a different form. Mm-hmm. Damn.
43:27
Mm-hmm. Wow. How
43:30
do you recommend people talk about that with
43:32
their partners? If there is something that comes up
43:34
or a bump or a lump or something? Yeah.
43:37
What sort of tones, what sort of phrases do you use? Say
43:40
the general checks at the ranch. I'm
43:43
not allowed to assess or diagnose even
43:45
though I might have
43:47
the medical know-how. I
43:49
don't have... It's a different job. It's a different
43:51
job. I can't
43:54
say, like, yeah, that is definitely meluscent
43:56
gum or that is definitely HSC. I
44:00
can't... say that. So I'll
44:02
say that I do see an area of
44:04
concern here that I might not be
44:06
comfortable with at this moment, but I
44:08
do encourage you to just have it looked
44:10
at and come on back when it clears
44:13
up. And that opens up
44:15
the invitation for later and not
44:17
saying that this is the hard stop
44:20
no more from here. No,
44:22
I'd be more than happy to see them again,
44:24
just in a safer way. And
44:27
that's what makes us sexy, right? Yeah,
44:29
as long as it's safe. And we
44:31
do have mandated barrier practices that we
44:33
have to adhere to at the ranch. Right. And we
44:35
have to
44:37
go by that. I mean, we
44:40
started the condom use in 1986
44:42
during the AIDS epidemic. And
44:46
when that happened, there was a lot of pushback
44:48
of like, oh my gosh, no, we've been sharing
44:50
has been around since the 70s. And
44:52
there was pushback saying like, you know, this is not how we do
44:54
it. This is not how we do it. But
44:56
we adapted. I mean,
44:59
I wasn't there in the 80s. But they
45:01
adapted. And since
45:04
then, there hasn't been a positive cage
45:06
of HIV immersion illegal brothel. And to
45:08
me, that is sexy because it's hard
45:10
numbers. It's not just
45:12
a rumor or anything like that. It's
45:15
hard evidence. And gosh, that makes it sexy.
45:17
Yeah, it really does. You know, I was
45:20
home for Thanksgiving recently and telling
45:22
my family about some of the research I'm doing and some
45:24
of the ladies who I know who work at the ranch
45:26
and one of my family
45:28
members was like, aren't
45:30
they worried about getting
45:32
something like catching something health and safety? And
45:34
I was like, well, actually, they're a whole
45:37
lot more safer than swingers and people at
45:39
sex parties based on my
45:41
knowledge, my experience, like the
45:43
sex workers that I know take health and safety very
45:46
seriously. And we've if we brought those
45:48
kind of like testing standards into regular
45:51
civilian world, like if we got tested
45:55
out in the world the way that porn
45:57
stars do even, you know, on a biweekly
45:59
basis. And that would be so hot.
46:01
And of course, we would also have to
46:03
address accessibility and have spaces where that's possible
46:05
and get a lot of political
46:08
stigma and stuff. But it's
46:10
getting started on under-resourced communities.
46:12
Right, right, right. So
46:16
in your perfect world, what would
46:18
sex ed look like? Yeah, it
46:20
would start from a very young
46:22
age in an age-appropriate way. We
46:25
have questions, and there are
46:27
tactful ways of giving him
46:29
that information without being. I'm
46:31
going to use the word obscene here.
46:34
Not that it is obscene, but
46:36
there's just a good way to
46:39
deliver that information in
46:41
a scientific, evidence-based practice way. With
46:44
also maybe an emotional component that helps us
46:46
smash that channel. I just think of the number
46:49
of people who I've spoken to who had horrible
46:52
experiences at extremely young ages. Because I've definitely
46:54
talked to friends and family members and people
46:56
that are like, well, it's not like I'm
46:58
going to talk about it with my child
47:00
who is four. And I'm like, well,
47:02
maybe you should reconsider that. I'm not going to shoot
47:04
on you. But the way I say it is like,
47:06
yeah, that's a good point. I understand that people
47:08
have concerns about young ages. However, here
47:10
are my anecdotal stories with people who
47:13
had no information at those young ages,
47:15
and it led to these difficult experiences
47:17
that caused future trauma. Right, and I
47:20
feel like we're really having to play
47:22
catch up in that aspect. That's
47:25
one of the reasons why my job is sexy, because
47:28
I get to teach and I get to educate in a
47:31
sexy way. Right? Even within
47:33
the education I'm in right now, we
47:35
have a cohort that is in Amsterdam
47:38
right now, and they're working with young
47:40
kids in their
47:42
sexual education. And they are reporting
47:44
back and finding that it is
47:46
so liberating that
47:49
they're talking about this so openly
47:51
because kids are smart. Kids are
47:53
smart. And they have very
47:56
curious questions because they're curious just as I
47:58
am, just as you are. And they have
48:00
bodies, right? They feel stuff. Exactly. Exactly.
48:03
And they just want to know
48:05
how to process information or have
48:07
some guidance. I feel like when
48:09
we're asking for help and it's just shut down
48:11
of like, oh, we don't talk about sex. We
48:14
don't talk about those feelings. It only adds a
48:16
layer of resentment. And fear
48:18
and then a desire to go
48:20
forth and conquer or explore
48:23
nonetheless. Exactly. Skip
48:25
to the birth control. Like the boot of Gary.
48:28
Yeah. Wow. OK,
48:30
so starting at the younger age, any other pieces that
48:32
you would like put in your perfect sex? Oh, yes.
48:34
Yes. Yes. I have
48:36
a daydream of like, within the legislation,
48:38
if we were able to have more
48:41
accessibility, or if the world were to
48:43
have more accessibility to sex work,
48:46
legal sex work, safe sex work. Like for
48:49
example, my dream of if it were only
48:51
covered by insurance. Exactly. Exactly.
48:54
Oh, I wonder what those notes would look like. Like
48:57
writing to insurance. Oh my god. Well,
48:59
I mean, even what do the therapy notes
49:02
look like? Like even if it was, I mean,
49:04
I think a lot of plans have like 12
49:06
sessions a year, which I think is not enough.
49:08
Definitely not enough. But even if we had that,
49:10
like if someone knew, if I knew that I
49:12
would definitely get fucked in a
49:15
safe, compassionate way once a month, I'd
49:17
be able to focus so much better. And if I knew it
49:19
was like once a week or every other week,
49:21
I would be fucking flying. Right. That would
49:23
make such a huge difference in my life. And knowing
49:25
that that date is coming up. Yes. Something to look
49:27
forward to, something to prepare for, something where I
49:29
could like report back whether it's the
49:32
same provider or different providers. That's where I think it
49:34
could be a different sort of therapy. That's my dream.
49:36
And then like a sex camp where I could go
49:38
and learn special things. Yeah. To
49:40
me, it's always in a library
49:42
because I always feel that libraries
49:44
are so underutilized. There's
49:46
so many great resources, like
49:49
checking out books or regardless that
49:53
what if you wanted to try a certain
49:55
subject and you get to learn on that
49:57
in a hands-on way. I can't
49:59
remember what library. it was that they
50:01
have like the human experience like workshop
50:04
where you can sit down and
50:06
have a conversation with somebody who's
50:08
had a different experience from you.
50:10
They're a firefighter. They were around
50:13
during World War Two. They were
50:15
around for the Civil Rights Movement.
50:18
And you have that
50:20
conversation with somebody, but what if
50:22
you had an hands-on workshop with
50:25
a sex worker who can give you that
50:27
information in a safe way
50:29
and with tools that are
50:31
right? Not
50:34
right, but accurate to
50:36
what the body needs. Yeah. Yeah. And they
50:39
can take that off into the world with
50:41
their knowledge and spread it around. I mean,
50:43
it certainly would bring a new meaning to like
50:45
the idea that knowledge is sexy. Like
50:48
a library with a whole new... Oh my gosh. Right.
50:50
Right. Oh, I love that.
50:52
What about you? What would your sex
50:54
education look like? In my perfect world,
50:57
there are spaces in
50:59
every major city. So ideally within
51:02
an hour car ride of any
51:05
locale in any place. And
51:07
imagine, you know, there's a educational
51:10
component that looks like a museum. And
51:13
that place also has a workshop space and
51:15
also has the best gift shop ever. And
51:17
then there is a place space up above
51:19
or below, or maybe in a separate building.
51:21
But the idea of how I
51:23
would organize the museum is to be age
51:25
appropriate. So you have literal different levels and
51:27
so designed for families. And then when you
51:30
get up into like the teen years, maybe
51:32
they do want to come by themselves. Maybe
51:34
they're not in literal organics, but maybe that's
51:36
a place where teenagers could go and have
51:38
a date so that they could learn. And
51:40
there are trusted adults to talk to. Obviously, there'd have
51:42
to be parental signatures in the country we live in. But
51:44
like, I think this idea that
51:47
kids can't know is so harmful. And I
51:49
think it creates such a strange, such a
51:51
strange dynamic. And I understand that it comes
51:53
from the discomfort that many
51:55
adults have of not knowing how to address this
51:57
subject themselves with their partners. How the fuck do
51:59
they They need, nobody taught us how to talk to kids
52:01
about this. And so for me,
52:04
all of the best education comes in
52:06
entertaining experiences. What if we used the
52:09
power that we have nowadays to harness
52:11
dopamine, like to harness that attention and
52:14
to turn it towards things that would help our
52:16
physical 3D bodies experience the
52:18
world better? And so for me, it also looks holistic,
52:20
right? Like sex is never just sex, like you said,
52:22
it's our brains. And what makes our brains comfortable? Sleep,
52:25
good food, exercise. I know
52:27
these are things that people like roll their eyes
52:29
and they're like, well, how could we possibly? But
52:31
it's like, well, I mean, yeah, maybe we need
52:33
a societal overhaul to make sure that those priorities
52:35
that like bring us pleasure actually
52:38
are available. Maybe we need to be
52:40
talking more about what lifestyles look like
52:43
that can help people be
52:45
on paths that veer away from
52:48
deep anxiety and depression and all the
52:50
hard things that come with screen
52:53
addictions or sedentary lifestyles or
52:55
processed foods and all of that. And so I think for
52:57
me, I'm also always
52:59
operating in the realm of the positive, not the
53:01
negative. So I'm like, for
53:03
myself, setting up a life
53:05
where I eat delicious, nutritious food and
53:08
find ways that are pleasing to me
53:10
to move my body and find,
53:13
you know, I've spent the last five
53:15
or six years researching types of communication
53:17
that helped me connect with people. And
53:19
that's something that I'm always
53:21
working on and I continue to find
53:23
a challenge. But opening up
53:25
those resources in a place where people can
53:28
browse on their own and then there are
53:30
workshops, regular workshops, probably on the weekends so
53:32
that, you know, at times where people can come
53:34
and be, and then maybe
53:36
in the mornings, there's yoga classes there. Like I really
53:38
seek, and if there was a space like that
53:40
that was basically like, you know, as
53:43
common as a Starbucks, that would be ideal. Like
53:45
if that, and if sex shops were that common
53:47
and maybe mixed in with good food, I don't
53:49
know, you know, and I dream of then having
53:51
a larger space, probably out in the middle
53:53
of the desert, like, but again, this would take huge
53:56
political, big dollars, but I'm like, what if
53:58
there were a space? where this
54:01
is the grown-ups section and
54:03
then this is the family-friendly section and during
54:05
the day, you know, this is the part where we focus
54:07
on non-sexual creativity and art because I
54:09
really think that sex is our original creativity
54:11
and then over there that's where the grown-ups get
54:14
to go learn and play and maybe have
54:16
sex workers who come in for
54:18
that threesome or who are teaching the workshop
54:20
or maybe there is an event
54:22
for swingers or open people that
54:25
starts with a human connection
54:27
that starts with ground rules and I
54:29
know there are some spaces to do this really
54:32
well I've been interviewing people and learning about that but
54:34
where you know The use of
54:36
dental dams or laurels and condoms is
54:38
normalized because that's my biggest problem with
54:40
play spaces is it's like yeah, yeah,
54:42
yeah be safe use protection get consent,
54:44
but it's like I Need
54:47
more explicit discussion about what that is like
54:49
And I think working that into the event
54:51
working that into the space and then having
54:53
it supported by everyone who works there You
54:55
know at the largest level I'm like, yes
54:58
It's a giant creativity resort, you know mixed
55:00
where the kids are safely taken care of
55:02
where they get to practice kind of the
55:04
Montessori or Waldorf style schooling
55:07
and then everyone gets to kind
55:10
of you know live in a
55:12
world where it's safe and Judgment
55:14
free or whatever judgment
55:17
is a human thing it comes up, but
55:19
inevitably we would be able to discover How
55:22
to deal with the pokey parts of
55:25
humanity, right? Right and overall you're giving
55:27
them tools. Yeah in my mind it's
55:30
Similar to a science museum where you have to
55:32
look feel free to touch Yeah,
55:35
as long as you respect the
55:37
exhibit and you want to learn you're welcome here
55:39
And that's the type of stuff that I'm like
55:41
Well, I don't I don't have the budget or
55:43
the bandwidth or enough patrons yet to
55:45
make that happen But what I'm
55:47
moving toward I think and I don't know how to
55:49
balance this with the work that I do on the
55:51
podcast Is as I cross off my
55:53
bucket list I want to invite
55:56
people who are comfortable to join me in that
55:58
way so that I can be the example exhibit
56:00
myself and be an example and be like, no, no,
56:02
no, I promise, a juridic entertainment, it's the way of
56:04
the future so that we can have some sort of
56:07
connection. Because I hear from so many people
56:09
who are struggling with basic human
56:11
connection beyond touch, but touch is a huge part of
56:13
that. And I also know
56:15
many people who get the touch, but
56:18
they just sort of want to have
56:20
this eye-is-closed, casual, I don't even
56:22
want to, it's just stranger sex and learn, when
56:24
I talk to them more deeply, it's because they
56:26
don't feel good enough in this way, or they
56:28
want to be accepted in that way, and there's
56:30
fear, which I also relate
56:32
to, that alienation. Absolutely. So yeah,
56:34
so at the largest level, I'm like, yes,
56:36
there are online components, and it's integrated with,
56:39
we would need one of the major tech
56:41
companies to kind of hop on board, so
56:43
we could, and then the educational classes, and
56:46
it's like you get your little badges, and
56:48
you're allowed into certain spaces when you have
56:50
this certain level of education, and it's all relational,
56:52
right? So there's at least two people vouching for
56:54
every other person, so there's, basically, I
56:57
spend a lot of time noodling on ways
56:59
to kind of
57:01
bring back some of the social expectations
57:04
that has been, I think, lost with
57:06
the rise of the internet, where people
57:08
feel free to just be very, very
57:10
rude, you know, and as much as I like
57:12
spaces like Setlife, where people are free to kind of like share
57:14
their kinks, and let their freak flags fly,
57:17
like I really feel like I'm experiencing a
57:19
lot of imbalance in the sense of, I'm
57:21
public, or at
57:23
least why I leave public. Right. And
57:25
I get a lot of messages
57:27
from people who are like, why do I love
57:30
you? I'm not even gonna tell you my real
57:32
name. I am married, and this obviously has to
57:34
be a secret, but do you wanna go on
57:36
a date? And I'm like, well, no. If you
57:38
won't even be a guest on sex stories with
57:40
an alias, what are we doing here? So
57:42
as much as I like spaces like Setlife, where people
57:44
are free to be themselves,
57:46
I'm like, but hey, everyone
57:49
who works at a corporation, and couldn't
57:51
possibly, if we were all honest about
57:53
what we were doing in respectful ways,
57:56
they can't fire us all. Especially
57:58
people at the middle. and lower tiers like
58:01
they can't function without all of us and I
58:03
think the society that we're in is just ridiculous.
58:05
So there's a long-winded answer to say I have
58:07
many layers of this dream and also I didn't
58:09
even get to my mobile dungeon playships so you
58:11
know and that would be the roaming one to
58:13
kind of fill in the gaps because obviously we
58:16
could only start in one giant location, maybe the
58:18
giant location first, maybe little locations first, I don't
58:20
know, maybe just playships first and have
58:22
those kind of like roving around like like a book
58:24
share. I think it's beautiful especially
58:27
in this holistic view.
58:29
I mean they talk about that in nursing all
58:31
the time. It's holistic, it's holistic on
58:34
the patient end of things. I'm trying to find
58:36
out what their goals are and pull from different
58:38
resources and what they need if it's physical
58:40
therapy, occupational therapy, if they need
58:42
music therapy, what have you and
58:44
in this holistic view of sex,
58:47
let me know what your goals are and I
58:50
will pull from different resources so we can get
58:52
you to where you want to be. And
58:55
you know and think about too the
58:57
impact that if we lived in a
58:59
world where holistic health were actually valued,
59:01
it would completely impact and disrupt
59:03
and I understand that's why it's not happening
59:05
the way that our medical
59:07
industry works, the way that the pharmaceutical industry works,
59:09
the way that... Tell me about it. I know,
59:11
I know you know, you know and so these
59:14
are all big dreams. We'll see how far I
59:16
can get to, how far I can go. I
59:18
would obviously need a business partner with much better
59:20
social skills and huge budgets but a
59:22
girl can dream, you know and the
59:24
more basic level that feels more accessible to
59:26
me is my future sci-fi, sex ed, future
59:28
film musical, Mission 69 which is all about
59:30
making, taking care of each other the norm
59:33
which is not part of our culture which
59:35
I think is very sad and in the
59:37
meantime I'm trying to figure out how to do the
59:39
podcast and maybe also just do TikTok versions. I don't know
59:42
and battling censorship, you know so yeah in
59:44
my perfect world. The legislators
59:47
who I understand they
59:49
believe that they're well intentioned by blocking
59:51
information and I just really wonder what it would be
59:53
like to sit down with them and have a conversation
59:56
to be like, hey do you realize the amount of
59:58
harm that is coming out of this silence? All
1:00:00
these big it's violent and cycles of it. So tell
1:00:02
me about it. Yeah. Okay
1:00:04
So we've already gotten some delicious
1:00:07
details about your work, but I'd
1:00:09
love to hear like how important
1:00:12
is sex in your life And
1:00:15
how are you making the world affects your more loving
1:00:17
place? Yeah, so Many
1:00:19
made not have known either
1:00:21
coming from the ranch or otherwise But
1:00:24
before I started working at cherries,
1:00:26
I only had one sexual partner
1:00:28
and I Began
1:00:31
to go through trial on error on
1:00:33
what was working for me and what wasn't working
1:00:36
for me in my sex life and
1:00:38
so I kind of put myself in his
1:00:40
own container of Oh Camille's
1:00:44
the quiet one Camille doesn't do stuff
1:00:46
like that. What would people think if Camille did this?
1:00:50
But in regards to the importance of sex
1:00:53
it has had this gradual incline
1:00:55
in my life that
1:00:57
when I had that realization of This
1:01:00
feels good and this feels good that I
1:01:02
can provide for people used to be on
1:01:04
the lower end of things like three
1:01:07
ish maybe because
1:01:10
I was just so oriented
1:01:12
on other things like my
1:01:14
other work or Perhaps
1:01:17
my own internal shame of like I don't
1:01:19
want that to go any higher like I've
1:01:21
heard about things where those
1:01:24
who have say on a
1:01:26
scale of zero to ten if they're on the higher end
1:01:28
of that scale then you know, stigma
1:01:30
stigma stigma and When
1:01:33
I just took this
1:01:35
total 180 to take this
1:01:37
jump to go into the ranch I
1:01:40
thought wow, it can be higher and that's
1:01:43
great. It's so great I
1:01:46
would say it's very important. It's important
1:01:48
for me to taste the different flavors
1:01:50
of life and look
1:01:53
within myself on what is Happy
1:01:57
for me. What is creative for me?
1:01:59
me, what is logistical for
1:02:02
me? And
1:02:04
integrating that within the
1:02:06
sexual aspect of things that,
1:02:09
wow, I get to use
1:02:11
the tools that I have and
1:02:13
spread knowledge and spread experiences in
1:02:16
a safe way, in a clean
1:02:18
way, in a sexy way. Maybe
1:02:20
I'll just spread some butt cheeks,
1:02:22
spread some blades. Yeah, whatever,
1:02:24
right? Whatever, anything goes. That
1:02:27
was a beautiful thing that I understood
1:02:29
through my sex work. I didn't hear
1:02:31
about things like the
1:02:33
Kinsey Institute until after I
1:02:36
started sex work. And I thought, wow, either
1:02:38
through my own experience or the hard data, anything
1:02:41
goes. Anything goes. And
1:02:43
we're all wanting to
1:02:46
experience these different flavors of life,
1:02:48
but we're not talking about it.
1:02:50
We're just internalizing it. And it's not
1:02:52
until somebody is sitting down such as this
1:02:54
and talking about it. And
1:02:57
that's when the shame meter was trying to
1:02:59
go down. And I was like, wow,
1:03:01
anything does go. And it's great.
1:03:06
Making the world a sexier, more loving place by
1:03:08
helping people experience pleasure and joy and
1:03:10
learning and welcoming things that
1:03:12
might be shamed in other places. How
1:03:14
did you get here? How did you go from
1:03:17
one partner out in the wild to a
1:03:20
brothel? And then like, when
1:03:22
did you realize you were bisexual? Right. So
1:03:24
I've been asked this question a lot because
1:03:26
people will hear that I am a nurse.
1:03:29
And it really was
1:03:31
a pandemic. I was so burned
1:03:33
out. And maybe you've heard of
1:03:36
the term compassion fatigue or social
1:03:38
fatigue. And I had
1:03:41
learned about the ranches out in
1:03:43
Nevada. And I was like, cool.
1:03:46
What did you learn about them? It must have been
1:03:48
through like a little segment on YouTube, like a
1:03:50
little like five minute documentary.
1:03:52
I can't pinpoint when because when I
1:03:55
started that, then I wanted to learn
1:03:57
everything about just because it was so
1:03:59
interesting. relatable. Yeah. Where
1:04:02
it just was different. It was different
1:04:04
and it was so close to where
1:04:06
I was. I thought,
1:04:08
wow, this is a thing. Like I always thought that it
1:04:10
was, it was
1:04:12
illegal. It was otherwise, and
1:04:14
it was just framed in such a great way that this
1:04:18
is a thing and it provides
1:04:20
a lot of benefits for everybody
1:04:22
involved. So I kind of
1:04:24
shrugged it off and said, great, not for me. Like,
1:04:28
Camille doesn't do that. I wouldn't do that.
1:04:30
But honestly, it's the quiet ones. But
1:04:38
that was before the pandemic. And when
1:04:40
things started to really get a little
1:04:43
bit on the decline trends of pandemic, I worked through
1:04:45
2020 and the majority of 2021. And
1:04:47
I thought that I need to take
1:04:53
a step back. And you take a
1:04:55
step back and this was always on the back
1:04:57
burner. And I thought, I'll
1:04:59
give it a try. A part
1:05:01
of me is also realizing, did I
1:05:04
just have like a screw it moment? Like,
1:05:06
screw it, the world's ending. I'm going to
1:05:08
do this instead. But I also
1:05:10
felt like I got into a profession
1:05:13
of caring, where I wasn't able
1:05:15
to care for people in ways
1:05:17
that I wanted to. There's a
1:05:19
lot of
1:05:21
my nursing aspects. I go into sex work.
1:05:23
Of course, sex work never ever, ever, ever
1:05:25
goes into my nursing work. But I was
1:05:27
able to pull a lot of that into
1:05:30
my sex work that wasn't even sexual,
1:05:33
that provided a listening
1:05:35
ear. And I was so
1:05:37
surprised to find out when I got started
1:05:39
of how much it
1:05:42
is of just therapeutic talk
1:05:44
and touch. And then
1:05:46
it can escalate into other things. Sometimes you just get
1:05:48
people where they're just like, I want a
1:05:50
five minute quickie and like no talking. I
1:05:53
was like, fine, sure, no worries. So
1:05:56
if those on the back burner, I took
1:05:58
a look around at all. the different
1:06:00
ranches are in Nevada and the different counties
1:06:02
and what their legislation is. I
1:06:05
found that the best fit for me
1:06:07
was at Cherries. I applied. I
1:06:10
was so surprised because it was just
1:06:12
like applying for any other job. There's
1:06:14
an online form and we give some
1:06:16
details about ourselves. We provide
1:06:18
a few pictures, but I also went,
1:06:20
this is probably faux pas by now,
1:06:22
but I also reached out
1:06:24
to our madam as well,
1:06:26
like an extra layer because I just
1:06:28
had no clue of how this all works.
1:06:30
There's not a manual
1:06:33
on how any of this legal
1:06:35
sex work really is. No, there's not. No, there's
1:06:37
not. And that's why I am researching the Horarchy
1:06:39
because I'm like, what the fuck is happening with
1:06:41
sex and commerce? Oh, social skills are part of
1:06:43
all that? Lying is part of it? Honestly is
1:06:45
a part of it. I don't get it. Yeah,
1:06:47
exactly. Exactly. I was like, I don't know what I'm
1:06:49
doing, so I'm just going to try and talk to
1:06:52
a person rather than talk to an online form. It
1:06:55
just goes out into... Who
1:06:58
knows? Exactly. If
1:07:00
this was in a physical mail form, did it
1:07:02
just go into a mailbox slot? That
1:07:04
is just like, question mark? So
1:07:07
I feel like I reached out to her
1:07:09
because I wanted to at least let
1:07:12
them know that my application was in,
1:07:14
but also provide a space where I
1:07:16
could talk a little bit more about myself. And
1:07:19
I was accepted. And
1:07:21
I thought, oh, okay. I was
1:07:23
asked, can you come in next week? Oh,
1:07:26
wow. That's fast. Did you? I did. I
1:07:28
did. Because I
1:07:30
had already pulled away from my nursing job
1:07:32
a little bit. I was just too tired.
1:07:34
And I had this
1:07:37
free time available and I was ready to take
1:07:39
that leap. And from my
1:07:42
understanding, they had opened
1:07:44
up in May of 2021 after, I
1:07:46
believe this is an 18 month closure
1:07:48
or 16 month closure,
1:07:50
Nevada wide due to the pandemic.
1:07:54
And when I got there, it
1:07:56
was so... different
1:08:00
in a good way. In a good way. So
1:08:02
different from what? From my usual 12 hour shift.
1:08:06
Nursing work. That
1:08:09
we are independent contractors and I'll
1:08:11
use another analogy here. So
1:08:14
in my nursing life, let's
1:08:16
say I'm so good at putting in
1:08:19
IVs. Yeah. So good. Like I got
1:08:21
you. You could do needle put.
1:08:23
Yeah. Oh. But not
1:08:25
at the ranch, right? Cause fluid.
1:08:27
Exactly. Exactly. That's bloodborne pathogens. But
1:08:30
there is an absolutely safe way to do it
1:08:32
at home. Yeah. Or I
1:08:34
can do like ultrasound IV where
1:08:36
we can look inside your arm and
1:08:39
we don't have to go digging around too much. If
1:08:41
you have hidden veins, we can go get
1:08:43
them. My veins are out loud. Yeah.
1:08:46
They're like, we're here, we're green, we're poking out. Yeah. Which
1:08:49
turn on vasculature. Oh,
1:08:51
love those veins. Like
1:08:53
if I can get a 16 gauge IV in
1:08:56
with like a blindfold and just
1:08:58
go, oh. 16 big
1:09:00
or small? Big. Okay. Yeah.
1:09:03
The smaller the number, the bigger the opening
1:09:05
is. Okay. Okay. But whenever
1:09:07
I would chart it out,
1:09:10
that would get billed to the patient. And
1:09:13
I would, I do make hourly as a
1:09:15
nurse and I wouldn't see
1:09:18
any of it really. I
1:09:20
would get my hourly and that was it. And
1:09:23
I was wishing that I could have
1:09:25
some sort of value or merit
1:09:28
behind what I did. And
1:09:31
so being an independent contractor was
1:09:33
really appealing that we could name our own
1:09:36
price and we could have
1:09:38
our own boundaries and our own areas
1:09:41
that we could specialize in. But they're allowed to
1:09:43
be a person. Exactly. A regular sexual
1:09:45
person. Well, maybe not regular. I don't know if
1:09:47
none of us are regular. One of my favorite
1:09:49
stories is when I first got started, I wasn't
1:09:52
on the floor quite yet and I was just
1:09:54
hanging in a ladies room in there. I got
1:09:56
so much help along the way. And it was
1:09:58
very, very, very. great
1:10:00
environment to start learning especially and that's
1:10:03
exactly what I needed. I had no idea on how
1:10:05
any of this worked and this
1:10:08
lady got a call while I was in the room and she
1:10:12
got a request so that's when we go
1:10:14
out to the bar to meet somebody if
1:10:16
we were asked or summoned. Okay, so like
1:10:18
the ranch calls her. Exactly. Exactly on phones
1:10:20
in our room. Okay, and it's
1:10:23
like blah blah blah is requesting
1:10:25
you and she said no, thank
1:10:27
you and hung up and that
1:10:30
just blew my mind. That just blew my
1:10:32
mind that you can just say no
1:10:34
and the world doesn't explode. That
1:10:38
it's okay that you can work within
1:10:40
your own comfort level and we are
1:10:42
allowed to refuse assignments
1:10:45
or refuse procedures if
1:10:47
we don't feel comfortable with them within the
1:10:49
healthcare setting. But you just
1:10:51
don't want to be that person because we're
1:10:53
so short-staffed and resources are already
1:10:56
spread so thin that everybody had to pull
1:10:58
their weight and everybody was I don't
1:11:00
mean to speak for everybody but
1:11:02
everybody was miserable. Yeah, miserable. Yeah,
1:11:04
patients were miserable, healthcare staff was miserable,
1:11:07
families were miserable, the population was
1:11:09
miserable. But
1:11:11
that just blew my mind that you could say no,
1:11:13
you don't have to do anything that you don't want to
1:11:15
do. You can give things a
1:11:18
try if you want to as long as it's safe
1:11:20
and like say with the genital check if even
1:11:23
if you see something that's questionable like maybe
1:11:25
it doesn't have a firm diagnosis or you
1:11:28
can get a second opinion and if
1:11:30
it's just a big question mark,
1:11:33
it's okay to say no because that's
1:11:35
all about being independent and being safe. Isn't
1:11:38
it cool? And
1:11:41
I got started and I
1:11:44
got a lot a lot of help along
1:11:46
the way but it really
1:11:49
reframed my way of thinking through the
1:11:51
past stigmas I had around sex work
1:11:53
of like, oh my gosh, these are
1:11:55
some of the most
1:11:57
brilliant people I know now. because
1:12:00
of we're just so
1:12:02
dynamic, we're so talented, we're so
1:12:05
smart, and we're loving
1:12:07
what we do. We're here on our own fruition
1:12:10
and it shows, it
1:12:12
shows and we have
1:12:15
a heck of a lot of fun doing it
1:12:17
too. So you went in just fully
1:12:19
by yourself. Fully by myself, I didn't
1:12:21
have any referrals or any word of
1:12:23
mouth, it was just based
1:12:25
on what I was able to scavenge up from
1:12:28
the internet. Wow. Were there other new ladies starting
1:12:30
at the same time as you? Not that I
1:12:32
remember. I didn't get a
1:12:34
formal orientation. I know that it was
1:12:36
pretty sparse that week in terms
1:12:38
of like other ladies there because things were just
1:12:41
opening up not too long ago and I
1:12:43
just kind of showed up and I don't even know if I
1:12:46
was supposed to like if it was communicated that I
1:12:48
was supposed to be there that week but they
1:12:50
said oh oh
1:12:52
you're here well sure
1:12:55
come on in and the
1:12:57
first party was like
1:12:59
five minutes after I hopped on to
1:13:01
the bar floor. You booked
1:13:03
a client right away basically. Yeah
1:13:06
like talk about baptism by fire. Oh my
1:13:08
god, always have a light. When you're nervous
1:13:11
I'm like ahhhh. I had
1:13:13
a very simple wardrobe
1:13:15
of what I thought I would want
1:13:17
to wear because previously I was you
1:13:20
know just in scrubs, civilian
1:13:22
clothes, whatever. Sometimes nothing
1:13:24
at all. And
1:13:27
I was walking out to the bar because I had cleared that
1:13:29
day and my room was all ready to go. What
1:13:32
is cleared? Oh right medically cleared.
1:13:34
Medically cleared and cleared with the
1:13:36
sheriff's department. That we're fingerprinted
1:13:39
quarterly and given a background check to
1:13:41
make sure that we don't have any new felonies under
1:13:44
a belt because within my county we can't work
1:13:46
with any felonies under a belt. Or
1:13:48
sometimes there are other stipulations like if you're behind
1:13:50
on child support payments then
1:13:53
you can't. There are just different
1:13:55
rules for different counties. So I
1:13:57
medically cleared within the ranch. we
1:14:00
test for HIV, chlamydia, syphilis,
1:14:02
and gonorrhea, and that's
1:14:04
through blood draw and cervical swab. So
1:14:06
that gets cleared, cleared with the
1:14:09
sheriff's department. My room's all ready to go. Okay,
1:14:12
now we're stepping on the bar floor. Because I don't
1:14:15
have a clientele. I don't have a clientele so it's
1:14:17
time to go into the bar
1:14:19
and go make some friends. And
1:14:21
I get eye contact with an
1:14:23
individual and I just continue
1:14:25
working because I don't know the rules of
1:14:27
how the bar works quite yet. I don't
1:14:29
want to do any dirty hustle or anything
1:14:32
like that. And another woman approaches him and
1:14:34
points to me and says, do you want
1:14:36
to talk to her? He says yes. I
1:14:38
was wearing a red dress. What a babble we
1:14:40
call him. That's what I was thinking. He's like,
1:14:43
gosh, thank you so much. And
1:14:45
that really set the environment as like, we
1:14:48
uplift here. We support each other.
1:14:50
We see each other in our post sex
1:14:53
robes and we cheer that on. And hear
1:14:57
the story. Right, right. And
1:14:59
it's just wonderful. So we went
1:15:01
back to my room and
1:15:03
it was refreshing to hear
1:15:05
that I could just talk about it
1:15:08
so blatantly. And I mean, in terms
1:15:10
of like, sexual activity. How was that
1:15:12
for you? Like, fresh in and also like, you
1:15:15
had experienced one person at that point.
1:15:17
Right, right. That it was refreshing.
1:15:19
It was just refreshing asking
1:15:22
him what he was
1:15:24
looking for and how I can help with
1:15:26
that. And set
1:15:29
a price. We booked and I
1:15:31
was just going based on what I was taught
1:15:33
of, okay, now it's time for the general check.
1:15:35
We go book in the office. We'll go back
1:15:37
to my room. We'll get your shower. And for
1:15:39
30 seconds with soap and water, please. I
1:15:42
have a little safety chat
1:15:44
and they will
1:15:46
just go. And everybody
1:15:48
has to like, dip their toes in
1:15:51
a little bit. And it went
1:15:53
fine. It wasn't scary. It
1:15:55
wasn't scary at all. And I can understand
1:15:57
that for those who do come in, it
1:15:59
is. is a little intimidating,
1:16:01
there is that aspect of the
1:16:03
unknown. Because that information
1:16:05
isn't out there unless you go looking for
1:16:08
it or unless you come all the way
1:16:10
in. And there's
1:16:12
just no way to know. There's no
1:16:14
way to know about how things go
1:16:16
without, say, previously emailing. And
1:16:19
even then, we can only give in
1:16:21
so much information. Right. What
1:16:23
are you allowed to share? What are you not allowed to share? Yeah.
1:16:25
So, if you're a lady in the room, if you're wanting to reach
1:16:27
out to a lady at the ranch, we can
1:16:30
talk about most things. We can't
1:16:32
talk about prices. And
1:16:34
that's just within the legislation. I wish we
1:16:36
could talk about prices. But
1:16:39
if you have a certain lady in mind, it's
1:16:41
totally acceptable to see if the fancy you have
1:16:44
in mind with intention. I
1:16:46
don't want any way to think that you
1:16:48
can just open up a conversation just for
1:16:50
the conversation's sake as much as I love
1:16:52
conversation. I'd like to say that more
1:16:55
for in-person at the ranch. I
1:16:57
just feel like it's more intimate that way. My
1:16:59
understanding of talking to ladies also is that they
1:17:02
could say, yes, I'll do this, no, I won't do this, and
1:17:04
the specifics have to happen. Yeah. Connectivity
1:17:06
is part of the conversation. Say that's part of the no-no. Exactly.
1:17:09
Exactly. We do get
1:17:11
a lot of questions about the ranch
1:17:13
and how it's all processed, like what
1:17:15
to expect when you get here. And
1:17:18
that can just differ from person to
1:17:20
person. And sometimes it's just so,
1:17:22
I wish I could just give this information.
1:17:25
So sometimes things just have to wait until
1:17:27
you come to the ranch. But
1:17:30
from there, I feel like the scariest thing is
1:17:32
just getting through the front door. As long as
1:17:34
you're getting through the front door, then you're my
1:17:36
guest, you're here with me, I
1:17:39
can help you out. Just take care of it.
1:17:41
Right. So in
1:17:43
terms of emails, I would say take a
1:17:45
look at the website, email a couple of
1:17:48
ladies you have in mind. It can be
1:17:50
a scheduling thing that maybe that individual is
1:17:52
not ready on Tuesday at
1:17:54
4 p.m. But you have a
1:17:56
schedule in mind that can help plan
1:17:58
out your visit a little bit. bit easier
1:18:01
rather than the overwhelming
1:18:04
aspect of like, well, I want to see
1:18:06
her, but oh, she's not available and oh,
1:18:08
I'm already shaken up a little bit, which
1:18:10
is totally understandable. Like I was there too.
1:18:12
I was there too coming into
1:18:15
this world as a provider. I could
1:18:17
imagine that it's a mix of nervousness
1:18:20
and excitement all in one. And are
1:18:22
they really very different, right? It's the story we tell
1:18:24
around it. I'm like, if you sign up for true
1:18:26
adventure, I mean, that's been my personal experiences. I
1:18:29
don't know what I'm getting into most
1:18:32
of the time in all of my
1:18:34
research, anecdotal research, explorations, explorations, but I
1:18:36
am so down for the adventure and
1:18:38
then, you know, when I know I'll
1:18:40
be okay. But my question for you now is
1:18:42
like, after that first party, were you like, oh, I'm
1:18:44
in, this is for me? Or like, at what point were
1:18:47
you like, oh, I like this work? Because
1:18:49
you've been doing it over two years now. Right, right.
1:18:51
I know we can't talk about hard
1:18:53
numbers, but the booking that I had
1:18:55
that first time, I won't,
1:18:58
like I said, I won't say hard numbers, but if
1:19:00
you're going to go make some comparisons on
1:19:02
your own time, go right ahead. But
1:19:04
that amount that I booked in
1:19:06
15 minutes, I made a day worth
1:19:08
of nursing. And
1:19:12
I logged it in my book,
1:19:14
recorded it in some way. And I
1:19:16
thought, wow, it
1:19:18
was safe. It was consensual.
1:19:20
I had fun doing it. I
1:19:23
was able to help somebody in their own
1:19:25
way and provide care in my own way,
1:19:27
behind that, meaning my prices. And
1:19:31
I was just, my jaw was on the
1:19:33
floor. Like that just happened. That
1:19:35
just happened. I believe I
1:19:37
was there for two weeks
1:19:40
initially. And I
1:19:42
had booked a
1:19:44
year worth of nursing in two weeks. For
1:19:47
our listeners, I just want to clarify a couple
1:19:49
points. Because when you say you made and you
1:19:51
booked, Right. Booking is the number,
1:19:54
like a big number. And then what you
1:19:56
make is after the 50% or whatever. It's
1:19:59
50%. percent but then it's different
1:20:01
things right? Exactly. So I
1:20:04
guess I made half. I
1:20:06
booked the yearly amount of nursing
1:20:08
but I made half of
1:20:10
that in two weeks.
1:20:12
So I thought
1:20:14
oh I remember
1:20:17
there were two hands like on my
1:20:19
forehead when I had booked like
1:20:21
a four-figure party and I
1:20:23
was telling the front desk like this
1:20:26
this this is a thing this is
1:20:28
a thing and I
1:20:31
was having a good time doing it
1:20:33
but in a way that I could
1:20:35
help people I mean I really
1:20:39
had a baptism by fire it was a
1:20:41
lot of fun that I got virgins and
1:20:43
I got couples and I had
1:20:45
individuals who were widowed or
1:20:48
newly divorced and I
1:20:50
felt like I had that social know-how
1:20:52
through the healthcare world but I was
1:20:55
bringing it over into this brand new
1:20:57
sex work world and
1:21:00
I felt so privileged
1:21:02
that I could be there yeah so
1:21:04
I kept them in bed and
1:21:07
again and again and the
1:21:10
experiences that I get to share with
1:21:12
people and my
1:21:14
own art form in a way to
1:21:17
implement into this world I came
1:21:20
from a world in healthcare that
1:21:22
it was very strict by the
1:21:24
book for reasons for absolute safety
1:21:26
reasons and making sure that
1:21:28
we're not just going willy-nilly on certain
1:21:30
things it has to be on evidence-based
1:21:32
practice but here I
1:21:34
have a little more wiggle room that I
1:21:36
can be a little more creative I can be a
1:21:40
little more spontaneous and
1:21:42
fun as long as all
1:21:45
or those in the party feel good about it and
1:21:49
I love it I really do
1:21:51
amazing I oh
1:21:54
are so many things that I want
1:21:56
to ask you about first I just
1:21:58
imagine that it's so hot to
1:22:00
be valued so concretely. You know, as a
1:22:02
person who gets a lot of requests for
1:22:04
free time and attention, and I'm like, don't
1:22:07
you understand that in order to skip all
1:22:09
the steps of intimacy and trust
1:22:11
building, there needs to be some sort of exchange
1:22:13
here. You know, that's what people are paying for
1:22:15
at the ranch. It's like instant, instant rent. I
1:22:17
would love to hear what the evolution over two
1:22:19
years has been like for you. Like, what have
1:22:21
you learned? What are the takeaways? And kind of
1:22:23
like, I don't know if there's stories
1:22:26
in there that you want to kind of like pepper
1:22:28
in, or just the person you find most gratifying, or
1:22:30
how your own creativity has had an opportunity to flourish
1:22:32
in that time. Yeah. And I do feel that
1:22:35
success, however you define that,
1:22:37
isn't linear. As long as
1:22:39
you have a goal in mind and you're making
1:22:42
that, even a small exponential change over time, you'll
1:22:44
get there. Sometimes within this
1:22:46
graph, you have dips and humps,
1:22:48
but overall, it's like a raffle. Right,
1:22:50
right. It's a positive incline. Or maybe it goes
1:22:52
down. That's okay. But
1:22:56
if you have a goal in mind, try to make the steps
1:22:58
and go get it. But
1:23:00
it was absolutely an evolution
1:23:02
where, especially in terms of
1:23:05
giving free time or setting boundaries, that
1:23:08
I could be vocal on things. And
1:23:10
you can either respect that, or if
1:23:12
you don't, then it's time to go.
1:23:14
We also have resources that if we
1:23:16
do have to get security involved, that
1:23:18
it's there. Knock on wood hasn't
1:23:21
happened yet. But
1:23:23
it really was that previously I felt
1:23:25
that, not that I didn't have a
1:23:27
voice, but I'm here as a provider
1:23:29
and something's uncomfortable.
1:23:32
Either my positioning is off, or
1:23:35
maybe their touch is a little too rough, that I
1:23:37
would just kind of take it. I would just go
1:23:41
with it. And I thought,
1:23:43
this is their thing. I don't want
1:23:45
to throw off their groove. But
1:23:47
now, it's like, nope,
1:23:49
nope, we are absolutely saying that
1:23:52
we like what I
1:23:54
want as what would really be
1:23:56
hot as you went a little bit to
1:23:58
the left. And after. Like what if
1:24:00
that was in all the communication? I
1:24:02
know I speak to many people who are excellent
1:24:04
communicators with their partners and they have to roof
1:24:07
down or they're just like communication ninjas and it
1:24:09
comes easily to them or they have that self-assertion.
1:24:11
But it's like I think
1:24:13
most people who I speak with who
1:24:15
have any care for individuals outside themselves
1:24:17
which is to say you know anyone
1:24:19
who is not a narcissist, they want
1:24:22
that kind of guidance. They want that feedback.
1:24:24
You know I imagine you get people who
1:24:26
also want to please you just as much as
1:24:28
they want you to please them. Right and that
1:24:30
was a new concept for me as well and
1:24:33
a hot one too because it was like oh you
1:24:36
want to know about what I like? Well here,
1:24:38
here let me show you. So
1:24:41
it was just about finding a voice. In
1:24:43
the nursing world it was of no problem
1:24:45
to me to advocate for patients and families.
1:24:47
No problem. But if
1:24:50
it was an off day, doctors
1:24:52
having a bad day, doctors yelling at me that
1:24:54
I would just shrink up, you know
1:24:56
get this shield going and just
1:24:59
take it. But then I
1:25:01
realized like no I hear and what is
1:25:03
kind of projecting out into my civilian life
1:25:05
too is that I can't speak for myself
1:25:08
and I can say when something
1:25:11
is okay or not and if it's
1:25:13
respected, thank you. If
1:25:16
not, then we
1:25:18
need to reevaluate things here and usually in the
1:25:20
form of you're out of here. Yeah,
1:25:22
have you had to do that? Like have you had to
1:25:24
kick people out? A couple times. A couple times. Usually it's
1:25:26
in the form of boundary pushing. And
1:25:28
I was mentioning earlier like three strikes and you're out.
1:25:30
I feel like that's a fair rule. Perhaps
1:25:33
the first time was on accident. The second
1:25:35
time, hmm what's going on here?
1:25:37
Third time, alright. Out of here. Do you
1:25:40
feel comfortable sharing some of the boundaries that
1:25:42
maybe people are pushing whether
1:25:44
it's on accident or becomes clear that
1:25:46
it's like intentional? Yeah. It
1:25:48
was very surprising to me where people would
1:25:51
come in and they're looking for oral sex
1:25:53
on me. Or oral sex on them. And
1:25:55
it's like great, wonderful. I love doing it. Though
1:25:58
I just want to let you know. that
1:26:00
when it's for oral sex on a penis owner,
1:26:02
there has to be a condom in place. And
1:26:05
if there's oral sex on me or another
1:26:08
lady, there has to be a dental dam
1:26:10
and there, I can not count how many
1:26:12
times I've heard, what's a dental dam? Great,
1:26:16
now we have a learning opportunity here. For
1:26:18
our listeners who maybe don't know what a dental dam is,
1:26:20
it's a square. It
1:26:23
can be a square of latex
1:26:25
or neoprene that goes over the
1:26:27
vulva area that prevents any transmission
1:26:29
of fluid, say vaginal fluids, saliva
1:26:31
from intermingling. And at least for
1:26:33
me, I feel like it is
1:26:35
a lot better than skin on
1:26:37
skin, or say mouth on vulva
1:26:40
because there's friction there for me. My
1:26:42
clit is so sensitive, I'm like, I need laurels
1:26:45
or, you know, and I like the extra
1:26:47
coverage of the square because sometimes with laurels,
1:26:49
I'm like holding it anyway, but I'm like,
1:26:51
you're a little girl, you're a little girl,
1:26:53
especially with a partner I don't know that
1:26:55
well. Right? But regarding the dental
1:26:57
dams, I can still feel the
1:26:59
pressure, I can feel movement
1:27:02
of the tongue and the lips, I can
1:27:04
feel suction, and it's even
1:27:06
sexier because there's protection in place. But
1:27:09
when I do hear a lot of pushback
1:27:11
in terms of like, well, we can do
1:27:13
without it, like, oh, like, do we really
1:27:15
need that? Then that's starting to question their
1:27:18
motives on am I gonna be safe
1:27:20
in this situation? And I
1:27:22
don't wanna be putting myself in a
1:27:24
situation where they'll say
1:27:26
that they'll adhere to the mandated practices and
1:27:29
act otherwise.
1:27:32
Kissing is also a thing I don't do just
1:27:35
because it can spread HPV,
1:27:37
HSC, and when I get
1:27:40
pushback about on that, great. It's another learning
1:27:42
opportunity that I'll tell them, well,
1:27:45
HPV does transfer
1:27:47
orally, and it can go and detect
1:27:49
it and then stem into olferential cancer.
1:27:51
And then when they see it- Or
1:27:53
penis owners as well. Exactly.
1:27:56
There we go. Penis owners are not concerned about HPV
1:27:58
because they're like, I don't have a cervix. I don't worry about
1:28:00
cervical cancer. Exactly. OK. There you go.
1:28:02
Exactly. Other cancers to worry about. So
1:28:06
when that concrete information is
1:28:08
in place, it's a, oh, OK.
1:28:11
We won't. And it has
1:28:13
been really refreshing that when I do bring
1:28:16
out that information of kindly,
1:28:19
gently informing them
1:28:21
why I don't. But also, NO period
1:28:24
can be a full sentence, too. Right. And it is
1:28:26
the law, fluid exchange, you're not supposed to do, right?
1:28:28
Exactly. Exactly. So that's just
1:28:30
where it gets in place of, this
1:28:33
is why we don't do it. I don't do this. But
1:28:35
there's still a plethora of different activities that
1:28:38
we can engage in to still have a
1:28:40
great time. What are you looking for? How
1:28:42
can I help with that? Yeah. OK. So it sounds
1:28:44
like those are the less sexy parts of the
1:28:47
job. What are some of the
1:28:49
parts? I mean, obviously, the sex is very sexy.
1:28:51
But do you want to talk about
1:28:53
role play? Do you want to talk about your turn
1:28:55
ons? We've talked about reciprocity. I'd love
1:28:57
to hear a little bit more about maybe
1:28:59
some specifics, and then also your relationship with
1:29:01
freedom. Yeah, which is a really
1:29:03
neat, evolving one, because it went
1:29:06
from I had myself in
1:29:08
this really small, cramped, metaphorical
1:29:10
cage of, I don't do that. Yeah,
1:29:12
I don't do this. I
1:29:14
don't want to do that. But the
1:29:17
time at the ranch, sexual or otherwise, has taught
1:29:19
me that I should at least give it a
1:29:21
try, as long as it's safe. Does it feel
1:29:23
like it should? Yeah. Mm.
1:29:26
OK. The first tour I
1:29:28
had afterwards, I went skydiving. Yeah.
1:29:32
Because I was like, I'm going to do this. I'm
1:29:34
going to do this. And it seemed like such a
1:29:36
great idea when I hit book online. When I was
1:29:38
in the plane, I was shaking. Really? I was shaking.
1:29:40
And I was like, oh my god. I
1:29:43
did it, but I also use that as another metaphor
1:29:46
of people coming to the ranch, that it's very nerve-wracking
1:29:48
when you're up in the air, and you're about to
1:29:50
take this leap into the unknown.
1:29:52
And you're not quite sure how it's going
1:29:54
to feel, or how it's going to
1:29:56
sound, or how you're going to feel
1:29:59
afterwards. With my skydiving
1:30:01
incident. I was like wow, this is so
1:30:03
much fun. I landed in tandem
1:30:05
with the jumper And
1:30:07
I just threw up It
1:30:11
must have been the adrenaline but I got a
1:30:13
lot of motion sickness Oh
1:30:16
dang all I remember about skydiving is that like
1:30:18
I was so like laughing because my arm
1:30:20
skin was laughing I just remember being like
1:30:23
I'm slapping everywhere. It's just so funny Just
1:30:26
like a rag doll and in this space.
1:30:28
Yeah Grab these things. The laying down but
1:30:30
you're in space. That's my cheek But
1:30:34
I bet you hear sounds like that in the course of
1:30:36
your work too. Right, right Yeah, and that
1:30:38
brings up another thing that you know
1:30:40
sex is also very noisy Mmm, I
1:30:43
feel like especially the virgins who come
1:30:45
in there looking for this pristine
1:30:48
looking no sound involved
1:30:52
Sexual encounter that no there are all sorts
1:30:54
of wet slapping sounds
1:30:56
and sometimes queefing And
1:30:59
it's totally fine because our
1:31:01
bodies are cool and then I
1:31:03
just saw this whole dynamic of
1:31:05
different bodies different abilities and how
1:31:09
I could help cater to that through like
1:31:12
civilian know-how or Healthcare
1:31:15
know-how that I could implement
1:31:17
in this sex work way that was
1:31:19
overlapping in such a
1:31:21
really really special way That
1:31:23
I would see blind individuals I would
1:31:26
see those with real palsy or those
1:31:28
who have had stroke many years ago
1:31:30
and they're trying to find different
1:31:34
ways to become aroused that
1:31:36
isn't in say The
1:31:38
conventional penis way. Yeah, or genital
1:31:40
way How do you have those
1:31:43
conversations with people? It sounds like you have this
1:31:45
background in health care that would really inform
1:31:47
that and I bet our listeners would really
1:31:49
Benefit from just hearing how
1:31:51
you initiate those conversations in
1:31:53
a compassionate manner I know that it's a little bit different
1:31:55
when you're holding space as a professional, but I feel like
1:31:57
there's probably applicable skills for
1:32:00
anyone's life out there. Right, yeah. And
1:32:03
usually I've noticed that they'll reach
1:32:05
out to me via email and
1:32:07
usually they're asking what I'm
1:32:10
capable or what I'm comfortable
1:32:12
with doing with their disability
1:32:15
or sometimes they're asking if there's a role in
1:32:17
shower or am
1:32:19
I able to help transfer from
1:32:21
say wheelchair to bed? Do I
1:32:24
feel comfortable doing these certain activities
1:32:26
which I'm very thankful that
1:32:28
they want to reach out to me just to
1:32:30
make sure that I'm comfortable but usually it's no
1:32:32
problem. It's no problem. We can do it in a safe way
1:32:35
and good body mechanic way.
1:32:37
Yeah, yeah. And then they'll also
1:32:39
touch upon what their fantasies are
1:32:41
a little bit just to see
1:32:43
if that is able to be
1:32:45
implemented within their abilities. Okay. And
1:32:48
usually no problem. Yeah. No problem
1:32:50
at all. And we see
1:32:54
all sorts of individuals, all demographics
1:32:56
of life, all walks
1:32:58
of life. And I
1:33:00
feel just so privileged that I
1:33:03
can meet so many individuals from
1:33:06
all over say the world
1:33:08
or just within their
1:33:10
experiences and I get to learn
1:33:12
from it. But also people
1:33:14
do come to me for say, you know,
1:33:18
I am a nurse. I'm so sick. We talk
1:33:20
about medical roles. Like it's like it's so cool
1:33:22
that you have the actual experience to help someone
1:33:24
especially if their bodies maybe have specific needs
1:33:26
that someone, you know, I'm in the process
1:33:28
of learning. I have read a
1:33:31
lot of books. I have educated myself and
1:33:33
I do lack the experiential knowledge that I
1:33:35
suppose as a nurse you probably have, you
1:33:37
know. There's like a specific level of like
1:33:39
care and awareness about certain things but
1:33:42
also nurse role. Right. You could be like the
1:33:44
most accurate. I mean have you been a nurse more
1:33:46
often? Like what have you done? Tell us what you've done. Yes.
1:33:48
So usually if it is a role play scenario,
1:33:54
usually people are coming to
1:33:56
me for the nurse role play. You're the
1:33:58
nurse. Yes, I'm the nurse. However, I don't
1:34:01
even own like the fetishized nurse
1:34:03
outfit with like the little cap
1:34:05
with the red clap. I
1:34:07
do. And it's great. It's great.
1:34:10
No one gave it to me. Yeah. I
1:34:12
said, well, if I'm going to do this,
1:34:14
like they're probably looking for some accuracy. So
1:34:18
I wear scrubs. I wear, like you
1:34:20
get the compression socks. You're like, I
1:34:22
am a slutty nurse. I don't need to
1:34:24
dress up like a slutty nurse. Exactly.
1:34:27
Like that, I like the scrub
1:34:29
look. I like the scrub look a lot.
1:34:32
But like you're, you're getting a stethoscope. You're
1:34:34
getting a pulse sock. I did
1:34:36
have a role play once where an individual
1:34:38
had asked me that he wanted to be
1:34:41
dominated, but in the
1:34:43
scenario of a healthcare setting. And
1:34:46
I said, okay, did you have a certain
1:34:48
story in mind or should we brainstorm together?
1:34:50
And he said, well, I want you to
1:34:52
be a bit upset with me because I'm
1:34:54
using the call light too many times. And
1:34:56
I thought, oh, this is going to
1:34:58
be no problem. I bet like
1:35:00
sighted students can also really relate. Exactly.
1:35:04
Exactly. And not saying that if you're
1:35:06
in a hospital setting that the call bell
1:35:08
is absolutely there, of course, to help you
1:35:11
out. And we're
1:35:13
here to help. However, they're definitely
1:35:15
with anything abusive privilege. Need
1:35:18
for attention, deep needs for attention, deep need
1:35:20
to make sure someone's there listening. But I
1:35:22
imagine you've gotten some. Yeah. Big
1:35:25
time. So he
1:35:27
asked for this scenario.
1:35:29
I thought this is going to be no problem.
1:35:32
I looked internally into myself and
1:35:34
grew from your well of creativity.
1:35:37
Exactly. But
1:35:40
yeah, in terms of a
1:35:42
medical role play, usually I am in the form of
1:35:44
a nurse. Have you ever been a nurse
1:35:47
training another nurse? Oh, that's exciting. I would
1:35:49
love to get trained. Yeah. Oh,
1:35:51
you're a nurse. I'm good to do. Yeah.
1:35:54
That's how you put a cap and her in. Have
1:35:57
you done sounding? Oh, I want to do that so
1:35:59
bad. As long as like
1:36:01
you're not introducing any pathogens, like it
1:36:03
really it really should be sterile.
1:36:05
Of course sterile steel rods usually, right?
1:36:07
Boiling them and it's on a
1:36:10
sterile or clean surface
1:36:12
and you're wearing gloves and there's
1:36:14
good hand hygiene. Have fun. But
1:36:17
there are too many times that I see in porn or
1:36:19
maybe they're just not emphasizing the safety
1:36:22
that goes into that where I see
1:36:24
people sound is just like you just
1:36:27
grab that on your desk with bare hands
1:36:29
and where have your hands been and especially
1:36:31
for penis owners, they don't get as
1:36:34
many UTIs because of the
1:36:36
length of the shaft. Ladies on the other
1:36:38
hand, we've got maybe an inch or two.
1:36:42
And through medical
1:36:44
knowledge, I was able to do it
1:36:46
in a safe way and follow-ups, make
1:36:48
sure that they're not having any symptoms
1:36:51
similar to a UTI. I
1:36:53
was like, wow, this is really overlapping. Wait,
1:36:55
so did you do sounding for the first
1:36:58
time work
1:37:00
at the ranch? Yep. Yep. Have you put
1:37:02
in a catheter already at that point? Not
1:37:04
sexually. No, no, not sexually but like
1:37:06
in the course of like nursing. Absolutely.
1:37:08
Actually, we put in fully
1:37:11
catheters, say if there's like a bladder
1:37:13
obstruction or post surgery
1:37:16
or pre-surgery. But
1:37:18
you're saying you have not yet done
1:37:20
the medical roleplay of catheter insertion. You'd
1:37:23
probably have to be like prepared for that. Yeah. That's
1:37:27
not something that I would do on the drop of
1:37:29
a hat because I don't have the supplies outside the
1:37:31
scope of the norm. Exactly. Exactly. And
1:37:34
I used to joke that oh,
1:37:36
you want a naughty nurse and it's gonna
1:37:38
be so accurate like oh,
1:37:41
your leg hurts. Let me just throw you
1:37:43
some Tylenol and pitch the doctor. I'll be with
1:37:45
you in an hour. But
1:37:50
usually people are just wanting
1:37:52
that attention and care in a
1:37:54
one-on-one setting and whether if that
1:37:57
is me in
1:37:59
scrubs or me and Laundrie or nothing
1:38:01
at all that they're looking for that
1:38:03
one-on-one time. Have you been with other
1:38:06
nurses or providers? Sure
1:38:08
have. Yeah, healthcare providers,
1:38:10
you're not sneaky. Usually
1:38:12
you'll drop a term like a
1:38:14
healthcare term like, I'm anectomy. I don't
1:38:17
know why that would show up or
1:38:19
they'll say like, oh, you're
1:38:21
ACLS certified? Me too. I'm
1:38:23
like, ah, there it is. Are you doing healthcare? A lot
1:38:27
of nurses, a lot of physicians
1:38:30
and that does kind of
1:38:32
set a foundation on common interests
1:38:34
that I do know the
1:38:36
struggles and benefits of being in
1:38:38
the healthcare world and I can
1:38:41
relate to that and they
1:38:43
feel heard. I imagine that also
1:38:45
goes back to your reciprocity. I'm going to call
1:38:47
it a kink, I don't want to put words
1:38:49
here, but like your desire to have that reciprocity,
1:38:52
like being with another person who
1:38:54
is a care provider and getting
1:38:56
to be in that, like to dance in
1:38:58
that mutual overlap of like mutual care. That's
1:39:00
so yum. Yeah, big time
1:39:02
that they would come
1:39:04
in and now that
1:39:06
veil of, I'll say
1:39:08
professionalism in the healthcare
1:39:10
world, it's been uplifted
1:39:13
and now we can talk about sexy things
1:39:15
and we just happen to both be in
1:39:18
that world as well. Oh my God, that's so cool.
1:39:21
Isn't it? Are there any other like role
1:39:23
players or fantasies or just parties you've had that
1:39:25
kind of like stand out without giving any
1:39:28
details that would like compromise anyone's privacy, but
1:39:30
just, you know, what else
1:39:32
has kind of like blossomed in
1:39:34
your time at the ranch? You
1:39:37
also mentioned couples. Is that how you figured out? Sorry
1:39:39
for all the questions in a row, but you've also
1:39:42
mentioned couples. Is that how
1:39:44
you figured out you were bisexual? Yes.
1:39:47
That's so hot. And I had worked
1:39:49
with couples a good while,
1:39:52
but I just knew that, okay, I'm just
1:39:54
providing a service here. And
1:39:56
I was like, okay, yeah, everyone thinks women
1:39:58
are beautiful. Everyone goes through
1:40:00
the phase of threesomes, right? And like really wanting to
1:40:02
go down on a pussy, yeah. Yeah,
1:40:05
I mean, I'm here, might as
1:40:07
well. I thought the same
1:40:09
thing too. It's like, wow, these are so beautiful
1:40:12
and soft. And gosh,
1:40:14
if they have a passion for something,
1:40:16
you're like, wow. And their necks
1:40:19
just look so beautiful when they tip their heads
1:40:21
up and their mouths are so cute. Exactly,
1:40:23
exactly. And it just took me
1:40:26
a long while to come to that
1:40:28
terms, or having
1:40:30
that realization of like, wow, I
1:40:33
like girls too. Wait a
1:40:35
minute. Wait a minute. Even
1:40:37
though I told myself otherwise of
1:40:40
like, well, yeah, what
1:40:42
they do is just, it
1:40:45
turns me on. Hot people are hot. Yeah.
1:40:47
Connections hot. Yeah, I think it just came down to
1:40:50
that where like, it's not a
1:40:52
label on anybody, but just like, oh, that
1:40:54
beautiful person is beautiful. And
1:40:56
that just also happened to be
1:40:58
guys and gals. Yeah, everyone. Yeah.
1:41:03
What about other parties or role plays or fantasies that
1:41:05
you have either like done and loved or
1:41:07
would like to do? Yeah,
1:41:10
I guess I can flip this over that I've
1:41:12
been a nurse, but also somebody asked me to
1:41:14
be patient. They were a
1:41:16
paramedic and it was
1:41:18
with another girl as well. Their partner or
1:41:20
like another lady at the ranch. Yeah,
1:41:22
and you can't have two girls or three
1:41:25
girls or more girls if you're wanting. It's
1:41:28
very choose your own adventure there. As long as you
1:41:30
let us know what you're looking for, we'll try our
1:41:32
best to help. Yeah, but
1:41:34
they wanted me to be patient. And
1:41:37
it was just so much fun where
1:41:40
they had that know how and
1:41:42
I had that know how. Yeah,
1:41:44
dude, exactly. Exactly. Look
1:41:46
deep inside. All
1:41:49
my goals were exactly inspection. You
1:41:51
need a thorough assessment. And
1:41:54
I had just also realized
1:41:56
that I do love intimate
1:41:58
touch. Not
1:42:00
necessarily sexual touch, but massages
1:42:03
are great. Yeah,
1:42:06
big time. Especially towards the end
1:42:08
of my tour. Like, yes, you
1:42:10
can take some time and rub on my
1:42:12
body. You can have some massage. Start
1:42:15
with my feet and work your way up. And
1:42:18
then there are fetishes, right? Where there is a
1:42:20
fetish for everything. And
1:42:23
it's involuntary, too. You like what you
1:42:25
like. Define fetish for us here
1:42:27
today. And then there are people who
1:42:29
are maybe just like, fresheners. Like, what's a different
1:42:31
point? To me, a
1:42:33
fetish is an involuntary attraction
1:42:36
towards someone or something.
1:42:40
And it's so dynamic. And
1:42:43
they're so, like, listless on how
1:42:45
many different fetishes there could be.
1:42:48
But that doesn't necessarily have to be sexual. And
1:42:51
that's where I can like
1:42:54
music, but maybe it's
1:42:57
not sexually arousing for me. Not
1:43:00
necessary for you to achieve peak
1:43:02
arousal. Exactly. It does enhance
1:43:04
things. It enhances it, but
1:43:07
it's not the main goal necessarily off
1:43:09
the bat. I started
1:43:11
at the ranch with braces. During
1:43:16
the pandemic, I
1:43:19
had decided that I'm going to go for braces,
1:43:21
for metals, like brackets on the
1:43:23
teeth, braces, because I had
1:43:26
everybody was wearing masks. Everybody was wearing masks. And I
1:43:29
was like, well, this is my time. My mouth is
1:43:31
covered. Good point. And
1:43:34
I started at the ranch with braces. And
1:43:37
everybody was wearing masks at the time, too. So
1:43:40
I would almost reveal my math when that was
1:43:42
time to come off and be like, oh, surprise.
1:43:45
I got bling in my teeth. And
1:43:47
usually it was not a problem. It was
1:43:49
not a problem. But I did have a
1:43:51
couple of individuals who were like,
1:43:53
oh, yes, please.
1:43:56
Braces, please. And I was like,
1:43:58
oh, yes, please. that just never occurred
1:44:01
to me that that could be a thing or a
1:44:04
fetish. I had one individual that
1:44:06
that was his main focus. He
1:44:08
loved that I had braces. After
1:44:11
a couple of meetings together, he got braces
1:44:13
as well. And we
1:44:15
would do like these pseudo oral exams
1:44:18
on each other that you would do
1:44:20
similar to an orthodontic office. We're
1:44:23
counting brackets, we're trying to make sure
1:44:25
that none of the brackets pop the
1:44:27
wire. We're counting how many
1:44:29
rubber bands we have. And
1:44:32
oh, I've got blue
1:44:35
brackets now. Oh, I went for the
1:44:37
white brackets this time. It's something that
1:44:39
we could really connect on, especially if
1:44:41
both of our mouths were hurting, or
1:44:43
we're having different areas of friction
1:44:45
within our mouth. And now we have to roll up
1:44:47
the wax, put in our mouth. Yeah, but there was quite
1:44:50
a fascination within that for him, that he just
1:44:56
loved it. That is just so interesting. Also,
1:44:58
like, I will be honest, my head went
1:45:00
straight to pedophilia, like people that are looking
1:45:03
for that kind of experience. But that sounds
1:45:05
completely different. Question about the braces though. Yeah.
1:45:07
In an occupation where you are required to
1:45:09
use condoms and dental
1:45:12
dams, what do you
1:45:14
do with braces? Like, how did that ever
1:45:16
like snap them or like catch on them?
1:45:18
Right. And I had the same concern as
1:45:20
well. Like, Oh gosh, these snag on my
1:45:23
own mouth, they're probably gonna snag
1:45:25
on condoms. But that's not really
1:45:27
how blow jobs work. Exactly. Unless
1:45:30
you're wanting teeth on. Yeah. Top
1:45:32
of teeth. Right. Like a cheese
1:45:34
grater. I was worried. I did
1:45:40
create a technique where I could it
1:45:43
was just lips only and keeping that
1:45:45
out of place. And it did also
1:45:48
spark the conversation of like, well, I
1:45:50
absolutely cannot do without
1:45:52
a condom or a dental dam because
1:45:54
of well, I've got appliances in my
1:45:56
teeth that hurt your own shirt in.
1:45:59
Oh, damn. I
1:46:01
know. I'm so glad they're off.
1:46:03
I only had them on for a year and that
1:46:05
was round two of braces. I
1:46:07
adapted so I could give them
1:46:10
a good time but also within my
1:46:12
own comfort level as well. There were
1:46:14
some times where I wasn't as conscious
1:46:16
in what I'm doing and I'm causing
1:46:18
rub spots in my mouth and I
1:46:20
would get blisters and I don't want
1:46:22
to compromise skin integrity in my mouth.
1:46:24
Absolutely not. So it was just a
1:46:26
learning curve but gosh when they came
1:46:28
off, look out, it
1:46:31
was so much fun that
1:46:33
I could feel, you know, we
1:46:35
have our nerve endings in our teeth, a
1:46:38
different sensation of like, oh the condom is
1:46:40
smooth. The condom is smooth against my teeth
1:46:43
and just different awakenings of senses I
1:46:45
didn't have before. That's so cool. Isn't
1:46:47
it neat? So cool. Did
1:46:50
you have braces? I had braces. Yes
1:46:52
and full disclosure, I wear a mouth
1:46:54
guard. Like I wear a full-on mouth guard every
1:46:57
night and I paint my mouth shut to improve
1:46:59
the breathing in my nasal passage and like I'm
1:47:01
a big dork in bedtime and it's been a
1:47:03
minute since I have had anyone spend the night
1:47:05
with me all night. I mean I've done it
1:47:07
but like not so much in a romantic way.
1:47:09
Sure. Although I will be having opportunities coming up
1:47:12
soon so I'm like, what will that be
1:47:14
like? Yeah. Mouth guard
1:47:16
or not. Damn
1:47:19
good. No, I'll probably wear it. Yeah. It
1:47:21
almost puts in like an athletic aspect of
1:47:24
like football players who are hockey players I put in
1:47:26
their mouth guards like, all right now I'm ready for
1:47:28
activity, now I'm ready for sports. Yeah. Yeah.
1:47:30
Like get ready for sex, I've got my
1:47:32
mouth guard on. I have not yet gone
1:47:34
down on anyone with the mouth guard in
1:47:36
too so I'm like that can be interesting.
1:47:38
I wonder if it will enhance
1:47:41
like if teeth aren't your thing,
1:47:43
if it adds a little protection there so you
1:47:45
can have. Mine is the hard, yeah it really
1:47:48
is like the hard plastic kind of bitey and
1:47:50
so it might feel smoother. I don't really know.
1:47:52
We'll just all report back when I have
1:47:55
more data. I love it. Any other
1:47:57
like stories from the... the
1:48:00
ranch or just experiences there
1:48:02
that feel worth mentioning? That's the
1:48:04
beauty of it is that I never know
1:48:06
what's gonna come in through the front door
1:48:09
and every experience is... What's gonna want to
1:48:11
go in the back door? Exactly, exactly. I
1:48:15
don't do anal myself, just
1:48:17
saying. But I'm sure you know people who do if
1:48:19
it's needed. I mean,
1:48:21
no, that's not allowed at the ranch,
1:48:23
officially speaking. Officially speaking, though, when
1:48:25
it's behind closed doors and it's two
1:48:29
individuals that make a decision,
1:48:32
whatever happens happens. However, I do
1:48:34
not. Right, right. I do not. So
1:48:37
I have all
1:48:39
these experiences that I feel
1:48:41
so privileged to be a part of. And
1:48:43
sometimes it is. I'll just
1:48:45
use the word conventional here. Sometimes it is
1:48:48
just conventional sex, like kids and vagina sex.
1:48:50
But if I have a moment in there
1:48:52
that I can sprinkle in a little bit
1:48:54
of like, oh, here's a tool for later,
1:48:56
or here's a little education for you can
1:48:59
take out in the world. It's
1:49:01
just little moments like that that I really enjoy. Oh
1:49:03
my God, I got it. But I get to have
1:49:05
a lot of fun doing it. That's so cool. And
1:49:07
even in quote unquote, just penis and vagina
1:49:10
sex or vanilla sex with another vulva owner,
1:49:12
it's like, I still
1:49:14
find myself discovering so
1:49:16
much with every person. You know, and I sometimes
1:49:19
hear criticism from people that are like, you
1:49:21
only like kinky sip, you hate monogamous vanilla
1:49:23
people. I'm like, no, I
1:49:25
don't. I'm just highly curious. I like all
1:49:27
of it. I love learning from everyone and
1:49:29
everything. I'm seeing what comes next. Another
1:49:32
analogy here. I love the term vanilla
1:49:34
sex because you can always put sprinkles
1:49:36
or toppings on top of it. Vanilla,
1:49:40
great. If you're wanting vanilla, I like
1:49:43
vanilla. The basis of everything. Exactly. Yeah,
1:49:46
you want to add nuts or you want to
1:49:48
add syrups or fruit or any of that.
1:49:51
Just let me know and we'll get those
1:49:53
toppings going. Totally. You want to try
1:49:55
new toppings. Yeah. Oh yeah. And
1:49:57
I know there are people out there that maybe just want to
1:49:59
drink. syrup but like I
1:50:01
always want the sex part which is vanilla like
1:50:03
I want I want all of it and do
1:50:05
I want to add a dynamic yes do I want
1:50:08
to add a dynamic with everyone absolutely I don't you
1:50:10
know it's really specific about what I want are we
1:50:12
sharing this ice cream with three
1:50:14
spoons yeah yeah or are we all
1:50:16
just like licking it together because we've
1:50:18
talked about our health and safety practices
1:50:20
in a very specific way exactly how
1:50:23
has work influenced or informed your own
1:50:26
sex life to whatever degree you feel
1:50:28
comfy sharing yeah in my civilian life
1:50:30
I'm definitely very matter of fact we
1:50:32
are sitting down we are talking about
1:50:34
health and safety which is sexy
1:50:37
for me because that gives you
1:50:39
an even brighter green light yeah
1:50:41
rather than this like weird dim
1:50:43
one where it's like is that
1:50:45
a green light or is that
1:50:47
a yellowish greenish yellow you get
1:50:50
a civil engineer out here but
1:50:53
it allows me to be
1:50:56
more expressive on my wants
1:50:58
and also create a dialogue on
1:51:00
what their wants are as well
1:51:02
so I can sprinkle that in
1:51:04
too so it's this beautiful Sunday
1:51:07
ice cream Sunday so
1:51:09
health and safety expressions
1:51:12
curiosity as well yeah because
1:51:15
now that I'm awake I'm
1:51:18
awake and now I want to try new things
1:51:21
and if it works awesome
1:51:23
if it doesn't then
1:51:26
it's okay I've tried and I can say
1:51:28
that I can try that heaven
1:51:30
forbid I'm gonna be on a deathbed
1:51:32
and I'm gonna have regrets of like
1:51:35
oh like I wish I had
1:51:37
tried picking that one person you know
1:51:39
I did I did I
1:51:42
lived and I tell the tale so cool
1:51:46
I'm not trying to steer away from the question but I feel
1:51:49
like there are its own aspects
1:51:52
of specialness in every experience
1:51:54
that I have with an individual either
1:51:56
at the ranch or otherwise yeah
1:51:59
where I get in these
1:52:01
moments where I think like, oh, freeze
1:52:03
frame, voiceover, you're probably wondering how
1:52:05
I got here right now. Like
1:52:08
I am oil wrestling with two other
1:52:10
girls or I'm doing this role play
1:52:12
where I'm the student
1:52:16
and then I graduate into the teacher.
1:52:19
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. That's
1:52:21
so yummy. But usually
1:52:23
it's for me the connection
1:52:26
that I gain with being with
1:52:28
an individual and what they have
1:52:30
taught me. Yeah. And
1:52:33
I get to put in my
1:52:35
own tool belt, go off
1:52:37
into the world and have it as
1:52:39
a data point or an anecdote and
1:52:42
continue on from there in this
1:52:45
mission of becoming a
1:52:47
more sexier, loving place. Yeah. And
1:52:49
on that note, like what else are
1:52:51
you excited to explore going forward, either
1:52:53
in your work or your personal life
1:52:55
or if there's a distinction? Yeah. Yeah.
1:52:59
There is a lot of overlap with that.
1:53:01
So in my professional life, I'm doing a
1:53:03
master's in sexual health and
1:53:06
from there I hope that will give me
1:53:08
the credentials to give me
1:53:11
almost a shield of armor to have
1:53:14
people understand like, oh, she
1:53:16
knows what she's talking about and she's
1:53:18
not just a sex worker. However, I
1:53:20
absolutely feel like we should be hearing
1:53:22
the stories of the, quote unquote, just
1:53:24
the sex worker. Well, you know, I
1:53:26
agree. Yeah. Yeah. Because we
1:53:28
have things to say and just because
1:53:31
of the profession that we chose, it
1:53:33
shouldn't diminish anyone's. Like
1:53:35
I know for sure I couldn't be a
1:53:37
plumber, but that doesn't diminish their importance in
1:53:39
the world or teachers. Oh, yeah.
1:53:42
Goodness. I know that everybody has something to
1:53:44
bring to the table regardless of what
1:53:47
you are. So I
1:53:49
want to finish that, which is coming up. It's
1:53:51
coming up in May. I'll graduate.
1:53:53
Congrats. Thank you. And
1:53:56
within my Personal Life, I
1:53:58
Just want to try. Everything
1:54:01
and Everything is an sexual.
1:54:03
Or not isn't always
1:54:05
eat food I want
1:54:08
to. Go scuba diving
1:54:10
and want to. Go
1:54:13
to concerts and want
1:54:15
to help those. Like
1:54:19
say through volunteering.
1:54:21
And thankfully sex work has
1:54:23
given me that. Window
1:54:26
that I can. previously I was the
1:54:28
A twelve hour shifts six days a
1:54:30
week and work myself to death Sam.
1:54:32
So now I can put their energy
1:54:35
towards something and other projects that I
1:54:37
feel like are important at least to
1:54:39
me they don't I can have that
1:54:41
perform in that window that I can
1:54:44
help others and a scanner on my
1:54:46
own narrative rather than like of is
1:54:48
gonna come in. your settle for this
1:54:51
Now it's like your new era of
1:54:53
sexual freedom has. Led to a new
1:54:55
era of overall freedom in your life and
1:54:57
choice of them for. Oh yeah, he had.
1:55:00
That. The nail on the head right there.
1:55:02
and did you have something similar when. Things.
1:55:04
became a lot more sexual. I
1:55:07
really, really good at taking my
1:55:09
favorite things and making cages. Out
1:55:11
of and now I do like cages.
1:55:13
His. However, I do
1:55:15
so many things so intensely.
1:55:18
My angle for Twenty Twenty
1:55:20
Four really is to travel
1:55:22
more and recapture my own
1:55:24
sense of personal freedom that.
1:55:27
So funny because when I hear from people they
1:55:29
projected oliver me their ears single. Injured or not,
1:55:31
These things And this and that little some. Perhaps
1:55:33
because I take my. Sexual. Freedom
1:55:36
for granted because of the well.
1:55:38
when I was twenty seven I
1:55:40
decided that I was prioritizing is
1:55:42
my desire for sex and good
1:55:44
sex. So definitely relate and definitely
1:55:46
and you know, continuing to stop
1:55:48
ever into the new eras where
1:55:50
my priorities are actually priorities. and
1:55:53
that's the beauty of it by it that
1:55:55
it is a process because if i a
1:55:57
dutch experience everything all at once that one
1:56:00
that doesn't leave any room for tomorrow.
1:56:03
And it's important to pace yourself
1:56:05
a little bit and take time
1:56:07
to process that learning of, wow, that was
1:56:09
great, or I'll give
1:56:11
it two more tries. Yeah. Well, and
1:56:13
it's like I am an ever-changing being, and me
1:56:16
of five years ago when I was starting this
1:56:18
podcast is a very, very different person from me
1:56:20
right now. And it should be. And I, you
1:56:22
know, even though I've crossed stuff off my bucket
1:56:24
list, I don't want to do everything just once,
1:56:26
you know? So
1:56:29
if you could wave a magic wand and teach
1:56:31
everyone in the world something about sex, what
1:56:34
would you teach them? It's a process. We
1:56:37
have perhaps through porn or media or
1:56:39
otherwise that it's like, oh, now we
1:56:41
just take off all our clothes. I
1:56:44
feel like it is okay to sit
1:56:46
down, have a little conversation. It could
1:56:48
be a sexy conversation too. Yeah. Yeah.
1:56:52
I feel like, you know, through what we
1:56:54
see on TV or movies, maybe it's just
1:56:56
the pacing of the production and the, you
1:56:59
know, there's no time for that. I feel
1:57:01
like it does open up an important dialogue
1:57:03
that benefits everybody. And even
1:57:05
in the little sex education I got, it
1:57:08
was like this is what
1:57:10
things are done physically
1:57:12
and not mechanically. Exactly.
1:57:15
But not necessarily what leads up to that. You
1:57:18
know, it was just kind of sprinkled in there, like, you
1:57:20
should have a conversation or like
1:57:22
you will make the decision. I
1:57:25
hear so often, you know, especially the reason I
1:57:27
started this podcast is because I was listening to
1:57:29
other podcasts and there's a lot of like what
1:57:32
and shoulds and I'm like, but
1:57:34
what about the how? How, you know, so I was
1:57:36
just listening to a book that was like, you
1:57:38
know, you should definitely talk to your medical
1:57:40
provider and you know, their job is to
1:57:42
help you, you know, support yourself, but they
1:57:45
won't necessarily bring up sex because that's another
1:57:47
goal. And very few doctors are trained when
1:57:49
it comes to having those conversations. And I'm
1:57:51
also just like, well, how do I initiate
1:57:53
that? You know, how, what words do I
1:57:55
use? Exactly. Exactly. And
1:57:57
You know, there's a couple ways of saying
1:57:59
things. The entered not so great
1:58:01
ways to say things in terms
1:58:03
of your desires and making it
1:58:05
more the collaborative process rather than
1:58:07
like you will do this. No,
1:58:09
not at it really. ever. Comes
1:58:12
down about unless you haven't explicitly negotiate
1:58:14
a dynamic. Of us
1:58:16
do but in a not just out of
1:58:18
the blue exact not just. With the assumptions,
1:58:21
assumptions are so on. Sexy to whom. I
1:58:23
agree. I agree. And. Just
1:58:25
so I would say. Knowing that
1:58:27
it is okay having that conversation it
1:58:29
the or does he have to be a
1:58:31
lengthy one? Legislate hopes looks like this is
1:58:34
where we're headed. What are we gonna do?
1:58:38
A hop. And.
1:58:41
If you could go back in time and give. Younger you A
1:58:43
piece of sex advice: What age are ages would you
1:58:45
pick him? but which is. I'll
1:58:48
I'll give a couple stories are
1:58:50
so when I was young my
1:58:52
mom talking about the egg and
1:58:55
sperm aig sounds like an egg
1:58:57
in this of the correlated with
1:58:59
suit says. And
1:59:01
I had always heard of steak
1:59:04
and eggs. Never really hurt myself
1:59:06
and I was young by that.
1:59:09
Oh we have a is an
1:59:11
guys have states because steaks sound
1:59:13
like sperm class of family. Now
1:59:17
that is like he others have physical state.
1:59:19
Like between the legs. it's
1:59:21
me but it a has
1:59:24
face. Ah. By like our internal
1:59:26
anatomy of because that's how I
1:59:28
understood as like O'hare regular inside
1:59:30
of us and therefore guys have
1:59:32
states in Iowa so I would
1:59:34
probably and just how good sit
1:59:36
down with young young Camille be
1:59:38
like now the actually was like
1:59:40
these little slow with blaze little
1:59:42
creatures and that's how they swim
1:59:44
is hardly it a lot later
1:59:46
than I realize like what the
1:59:48
structure of a sperm is gosh
1:59:51
I hope so funny or has
1:59:53
a success and then much later.
1:59:55
When things are getting a little bit
1:59:57
questionable in terms like. Your
1:59:59
body's to. developing and all that,
2:00:02
I would say that it is okay to
2:00:04
be curious. It is okay
2:00:06
to be curious. It's okay
2:00:09
to indulge in that desire as
2:00:11
long if it's yourself
2:00:13
and it's safe and it's, you
2:00:15
know, nobody's being put into this
2:00:17
fantasy non-consensually or if it's with
2:00:19
a partner or two partners, as
2:00:22
long as the dialogue is there, it's okay
2:00:24
to be curious. Try it out because otherwise
2:00:27
you won't know. And
2:00:29
that's something that I had realized when coming
2:00:31
to the ranch, that it is okay to
2:00:33
be curious. Like I don't
2:00:35
know what it would be like to be on a hot 66th ball. I
2:00:39
liked it. That's
2:00:41
gotta go on my bucket list. Oh no, it's only getting
2:00:44
longer, damn it. Well,
2:00:46
that's the thing though, it's ever changing and
2:00:49
ever growing just like people. Yeah. But
2:00:52
I also find a lot of comfort in the
2:00:54
things that are consistent for me in a desire
2:00:56
sort of way. I love
2:00:58
massages, I love good talk,
2:01:01
I love to listen to people because
2:01:04
I get to learn. I feel
2:01:06
like that's where it is foundationally is
2:01:08
that I'm learning and I love to
2:01:10
learn. Learning is sex. Sure
2:01:13
is. Oh, okay. Fantasy
2:01:15
time. If we suddenly lived in
2:01:17
a world where everyone had to be a
2:01:20
sex worker for at least two years and
2:01:22
you had to do a different type of
2:01:24
sex work, how would you serve? That
2:01:27
is, like sex work itself is an
2:01:30
umbrella term too because there's so
2:01:32
many different sections that I can
2:01:35
go down. Gosh, I've
2:01:38
always wanted to try stripping. I've
2:01:41
never done it for myself. I mean, I'd
2:01:43
have on my own pole, but that's not the thing. And
2:01:46
initially I thought like, gosh, I'm going to be
2:01:48
a Corazon. I should at least know how to
2:01:50
strip and how to be on a pole. And
2:01:53
that wasn't the case, but that also put me in a
2:01:55
container. Like, well, I don't have to learn that. But
2:01:58
now it's like, I would at least want to. give
2:02:00
it a try to have a better understanding on
2:02:02
how it all works. So being
2:02:04
in an environment like the ranch, I get to ask
2:02:07
people with different specialties of, yes,
2:02:09
they do just domination or they
2:02:11
have done stripping or they do
2:02:13
the certain type of play and
2:02:16
those answers and resources are... it's
2:02:18
like a library itself that I
2:02:20
can just ask and
2:02:23
see if that's something that I would
2:02:25
want to engage in. Sexy human library.
2:02:27
Yeah. Different kind of sexy human library from the
2:02:30
earlier one. Right, right. Maybe on that note or
2:02:32
maybe not. You now
2:02:34
have an unlimited budget to build the perfect
2:02:36
playroom or dungeon or castle or whatever you
2:02:38
want. What is it like?
2:02:41
It would probably be a spa. It would
2:02:43
probably be just... because
2:02:46
your body is feeling good, like on
2:02:48
a ground level zero sort of way.
2:02:52
You're feeling good, perhaps you're
2:02:54
nourished, maybe eat some
2:02:57
good food, but it can also
2:02:59
have like a black and white type
2:03:01
setting like, oh we have the very
2:03:03
Aryan light spa over here and
2:03:06
then over here we have the dungeon
2:03:08
and then it's dark and we've got torches
2:03:10
and... And then maybe
2:03:12
the sensual flickering candle somewhere in between.
2:03:14
Exactly, exactly. Perhaps it would
2:03:16
be a castle with just different
2:03:19
environments depending on my mood
2:03:21
or the mood overall. Okay, so you can
2:03:23
be in charge of designing the spa at
2:03:25
the ultimate play camp. Hotel creation
2:03:28
is what I'm thinking about. Yeah, because that
2:03:30
is such a nourishing part. Okay, what other elements would
2:03:32
you want to have? Oh, that's a
2:03:35
neat thing. I used to have a lot of
2:03:37
dreams. Like in my dreams while I'm asleep, it's
2:03:40
very room oriented. Like I
2:03:42
dream a lot about malls
2:03:44
or like theme parks because
2:03:46
they have different subsections that are
2:03:49
special to whatever product
2:03:51
or dialogue that they're trying to open. So
2:03:54
it would be cool to see like, like
2:03:56
in terms of a castle or a mall like
2:03:58
setting that you just... go down this
2:04:01
way and you can branch out to
2:04:03
these different specialties like, oh yes, this
2:04:06
is the shower room and it's
2:04:08
a luscious, wonderful shower
2:04:11
or we have a backyard
2:04:14
and maybe that can introduce
2:04:17
voyeurism a little bit. Um,
2:04:19
statue garden. I have a fucking statue garden idea
2:04:21
where people can walk from balconies or
2:04:24
from these windows and the windows also includes little booths,
2:04:26
like little fucking booths. So one is a phone booth,
2:04:28
but all these tiny little spaces for quickies, hallway
2:04:31
of quickie booths that looks out into the
2:04:33
statue garden, the fucking statue garden. Yeah, exactly.
2:04:35
Like Superman. Yeah, exactly. And
2:04:37
different versions of the phone booth and different versions of all,
2:04:39
I mean, you know me, I like novelty. Right. Oh,
2:04:43
I can imagine too, like we
2:04:45
could have like one of those dry cleaning
2:04:47
revolving racks where just different costumes. Oh my God.
2:04:50
Oh, and I was thinking, I thought you were
2:04:52
going to say and like people could be fucking
2:04:54
in the middle of it, but maybe also that
2:04:56
also that like, like the costumes are going around,
2:04:58
they get cleaned, people could fuck in there, you
2:05:00
know, and like obviously respecting the costumes, you
2:05:03
know, and that's why bringing or
2:05:05
rather that's why establishing a culture in
2:05:07
those spaces, I think is so important for play so
2:05:09
that like everyone's type of play is respected. It's like,
2:05:12
okay, if you want to do all of the urine
2:05:14
and blood stuff, there's a room for that because
2:05:16
there are health concerns, you know, there's specific things
2:05:18
that you need. As long as
2:05:20
those practices are in a
2:05:22
safe container, have fun. I've had it.
2:05:25
Yeah. And I didn't say this earlier
2:05:27
when you asked me like my, because this is all for me
2:05:30
an extension of the fantasy. I'm just like infusing your ideas into
2:05:32
my, my future big dream. Yeah.
2:05:34
The first point of safety for all of it
2:05:36
is the health check
2:05:38
that everyone would get going in, you know,
2:05:40
and all of that kind of education is
2:05:42
the base layer and that's connected to everything,
2:05:44
which is not to say that we would do away with barriers because
2:05:46
as you mentioned, there's still concerns that
2:05:49
we need barriers for, but just
2:05:51
knowing that on some level we are really
2:05:53
doing more risk aware play. That is what
2:05:56
I just want. Yeah. Where
2:05:58
it's out in the open. it's
2:06:00
conscious, it's aware, but also
2:06:03
we have these practices
2:06:05
in place for a reason. And
2:06:08
that could be also chemical barriers
2:06:10
as well, like saying those
2:06:12
who get on a sick liver are a prep, that
2:06:15
it's just another layer there added for
2:06:18
the heightened experience
2:06:20
that safety is still in place. Yeah. Not
2:06:23
saying that it's mandatory, but it's there.
2:06:25
Like I'm on prep. Yeah. And
2:06:28
just in case. And I'm on a sick liver. Yeah.
2:06:31
Yeah. Look at us. It just
2:06:33
adds this delicious
2:06:35
yummy flavors that okay, I
2:06:38
can eat. I've been given the menu.
2:06:40
So yummy. Beautiful. Lovers,
2:06:42
you can find Camille on the internet
2:06:45
at twitter at Camille Davis LLC, and
2:06:48
you can go to Sherri's ranch.com. Type
2:06:51
in Camille. It's the easiest way to find
2:06:53
it. And we are linking in the description
2:06:55
below. Camille, thank you so much for being a
2:06:57
guest on sex stories. Thank you so much. My goodness.
2:06:59
Lovers, that is our show. I love you for listening.
2:07:02
If you want to support my work
2:07:04
as an independent artist, which includes this
2:07:07
podcast, if you want to go deeper
2:07:09
with me either online or in person,
2:07:11
visit wyolee.com/links for a no
2:07:13
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2:07:16
your appreciation. You can support this podcast
2:07:18
and my grad school tuition via Venmo
2:07:20
cash app or PayPal at wyolee or
2:07:22
find direct links in the footer of
2:07:24
my website wyolee.com. If you want
2:07:26
to learn more about my personal bits, you can
2:07:28
hear my sex stories very interwoven
2:07:30
with my work. I am
2:07:33
discovering on patreon.com/wyolee. You
2:07:35
can unlock my naughty photos and
2:07:37
videos one by one at only
2:07:39
fans.com/wire free, or you can subscribe
2:07:41
for curated selection of my favorite
2:07:43
and most up to date masturbation
2:07:46
explorations on only fans.com/wyolee. If you
2:07:48
want my focus on your personal parts, one
2:07:50
on one virtual options include phone or video
2:07:53
sessions where you can ask me anything, get
2:07:55
relationship advice or noodle on whatever it is
2:07:57
you're thinking about or do the in person
2:07:59
version and meet me for coffee. lunch or
2:08:01
dinner if you are in Los Angeles. Or
2:08:03
if you just need hot stills and or
2:08:06
video for you, your boo, or your fan,
2:08:08
send me a message via my website wiley.com.
2:08:10
I invite all of you to join me
2:08:12
in making 2024 the year of practicing offering
2:08:14
and accepting the most exquisite
2:08:17
irresistible invitations, and I would love it
2:08:19
if you would send me a voicemail
2:08:22
via sexstoriespodcast.com answering any or all
2:08:24
of the following. What
2:08:26
irresistible invitations have you received
2:08:28
and loved? What irresistible invitations
2:08:30
have you offered or are you planning to
2:08:32
offer? Or are you resisting any
2:08:35
invitation that you don't actually want to resist?
2:08:37
Do you have any stucknesses? Let me know.
2:08:39
Personally, I think a voicemail would make a
2:08:41
great New Year's or Valentine's Day present if
2:08:44
you ever want to. I love receiving good,
2:08:46
thoughtful, sexy stories. Again, sexstoriespodcast.com is where you
2:08:48
can leave me a voicemail, apply to be
2:08:51
a guest, and see all of
2:08:53
my sexy question lists, which I hear has
2:08:55
led to some very hot things between partners who
2:08:57
got curious with each other. Also,
2:09:00
an announcement. Sexstories is
2:09:02
becoming sexstories. In part, it is
2:09:04
to represent my surrender to censorship,
2:09:07
and it is also an opportunity to broaden
2:09:09
our conversations and creative discussions to include the
2:09:11
many of you who I hear from who
2:09:14
clearly want to connect but don't want to
2:09:16
talk about sex publicly, even anonymously, and
2:09:18
I am hoping that this makes us less
2:09:20
censored, actually searchable on Spotify, and
2:09:23
hopefully more appealing to advertisers because there's a lot
2:09:25
of stuff that I want to make for you
2:09:27
and offer for you, but I just need more
2:09:29
bandwidth. So while I will always be
2:09:31
most curious about people's sex stories, I am excited
2:09:34
to invite people to talk about all the relational
2:09:36
topics that I have written question lists for and
2:09:38
tests out in the park last summer. So if
2:09:40
you want to check out critique and or add
2:09:42
to these new question lists and consider joining me
2:09:45
as a guest in this new era of possibility,
2:09:47
I have question lists for dating, relationship,
2:09:49
friendship, marriage, divorce, love, secret,
2:09:52
creativity, and play stories. Check
2:09:54
them out at yov.com/share. Sex
2:09:57
stories, or I guess I should say, x stories,
2:09:59
is produced in edited by the birthday-tastic Kimberly
2:10:01
Loftus, who keeps this pod going and cheers me
2:10:03
up on the days where I get really sad
2:10:05
about the rude social and sexual norms in this
2:10:07
world that we live in. And
2:10:09
this is why, more than ever, I encourage
2:10:12
you to take care of yourselves, take care
2:10:14
of each other, and share stories in the
2:10:16
name of lovely human connection.
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