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details. Okay, next

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one. I

0:33

am always curious about what

0:35

people think about this. Okay. Am

0:37

I the asshole for not being happy

0:39

to receive a handmade gift? Oh

0:45

my god, that's so funny. That's a

0:47

great title. That's a

0:49

good one, right? And

0:52

welcome back to Shit They Don't Tell You. A

0:55

podcast hosted by Nikki Lemo. And

0:57

Steve Green. Steven Paul Green. If you

1:00

like this show, nothing helps it more

1:02

than checking us out on Patreon, patreon.com/sticky

1:04

STI KKI. You get this show

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a day early. You get my show, Crypto

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Corner, every Tuesday night, 6pm Pacific Standard Time.

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We go in depth about all beautiful crypto

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things. We do a live stream

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once a month called the Sticky Stream, and we

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do a free roll poker tournament for all of

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our members with cash prizes afterwards. So

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check us out. Come on out, check it

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out. Also share with your friends. All helps

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the show. We appreciate you so much. Yes.

1:29

You know who we don't appreciate? Is

1:31

assholes. Asshooles. Yes. And today

1:34

we are taking you through

1:37

some pretty insane, am I the asshole

1:39

topic? Oh yeah? Oh yeah. I

1:42

love these because Steve does not tell me any of them ahead of

1:44

time, so it's just like immediate

1:46

visceral reactions. So let's see your

1:48

immediate visceral reaction too. Am

1:50

I the asshole for telling my brother

1:53

he did put his wife's

1:55

once before his kids?

2:00

wife once before his kids. You tell me what

2:02

this says. Okay. Am I

2:04

the asshole for telling my brother he did

2:06

put his wife's wants before his kids, his

2:08

wife wants? Yeah, he put his wife's

2:10

wants. It sounded like you said his wife wants. Yeah,

2:13

I don't know, bro. Okay. Maybe

2:15

we'll just take it again. It's good. Okay,

2:17

that's good. My brother has two

2:19

children from his marriage through his late wife

2:21

Denise. His son just turned 20 and his daughter

2:23

is 18. Denise

2:26

died when the children were six and seven years old. Eighteen

2:29

months later, my brother met Catherine, his second wife, and

2:31

they married after four months of knowing each other. Catherine

2:34

was unable to have biological children and she always dreamed of

2:36

being a mom and wanted to be a mom to my

2:38

nephew and niece. My brother wanted this

2:40

for her also, but the kids did

2:42

not want to be Catherine's children. They

2:44

do not want to call her mom or be adopted by

2:47

her. They do not want her

2:49

to be the sole focus of Mother's Day, etc. My

2:52

brother spent years trying to get the children to call

2:54

Catherine mom. He and Catherine

2:56

applied for her to adopt the kids and were

2:58

rejected by the judge after she spoke to the

3:01

children about what they wanted. They

3:03

tried again and were denied by a different judge

3:05

before making it to court. Oh my God. Things

3:07

were always tense with my brother and his kids.

3:10

It was also tense with the rest of the family because some of

3:12

us spoke up and asked him why he's pushing this on his

3:14

kids so much. He would say Catherine

3:17

deserved to be a mom and deserved the

3:19

respect for being a loving and nurturing mother

3:21

to the kids. This is psychotic. It's kind

3:23

of wild, right? Yeah. Mother's

3:25

Day from the first year they were married until

3:27

last year was very toxic. My brother no longer

3:29

allowed the kids to see their maternal relatives that

3:32

day. What? They also didn't see any of us

3:34

or visit the grave. This sounds like the chick

3:36

is in charge. This is weird. It sounds like

3:38

the chick is completely in charge. I actually have

3:40

a friend that had a similar story to this,

3:43

but yeah, go on. Okay. I

3:45

want to hear about that too. He said the day in

3:47

their family was for Catherine, talking about Mom's Day.

3:50

He would make her breakfast, give her cards and

3:52

gifts from the kids. When the kids would tell

3:54

her she didn't deserve to be celebrated

3:56

for Mother's Day and she was nobody's mom. My

4:00

brother didn't like it and

4:02

and Catherine would be upset at the reminder The

4:06

kids would also be quick to inform Catherine.

4:08

They never wrote the cards Because

4:10

my brother always addressed them to mom and the kids

4:12

never called to that Oh my god, last few months

4:15

my brothers lost contact with his kids the last time

4:17

they spoke to their dad the

4:19

kids told him they put He

4:21

put Catherine's once before them and

4:24

they never forgive him for that. They said

4:26

he has no right to insist They

4:28

be the children to fill the void for when

4:31

they already had a mom who they loved My

4:33

brother dismissed the idea entirely he put Catherine before

4:35

his kids like that When

4:38

he saw when I saw him for New Year's at my

4:40

parents house He was telling me about it and I told

4:42

him the kids were right and he did put Catherine's once

4:44

before the kids I said he made

4:47

her want to be a mother the most He

4:49

made her want to be a mom the most important

4:51

thing and tried to force the kids to comply and

4:53

be her kids He told me that

4:55

that's not what happened and I should be sympathetic to him

4:57

and Catherine who had her heart broken by the kids Am

4:59

I the asshole? It's hard to

5:01

tell what's going on over there because I don't

5:04

know who's the psycho Yeah,

5:06

it's very much feels like it's the

5:08

brother or like it feels like the

5:10

chick is controlling the brother Maybe but

5:12

he's totally in on it. No, okay

5:15

So this is where I hesitate because

5:17

it sounds like when the Mother's

5:19

Day happened and she was getting cards and she was like I

5:21

don't deserve to be celebrated a blah blah. I don't know if

5:23

that's an act Or if like

5:25

she was like kind of embarrassed by

5:27

it It could be that this guy

5:30

is like his wife died and he

5:32

wants a mother replacement Yeah, like he

5:34

wants he's writing over the one's the story

5:36

pick up where it left off with her

5:38

death And he wants everything to be normal

5:40

like and I feel like that's kind of

5:42

the vibe I'm getting and I don't know

5:45

because there's not enough information But it sounds

5:47

like he's forcing a lot of this where

5:49

it's like well, she can't have kids and

5:51

I already got kids So like you beat

5:53

you're now their mom and everyone in the

5:56

family is like no Why

5:59

yeah, I don't It's the kids

6:01

were basically saying we don't like this

6:03

for a decade and like you'd never

6:05

adjusted. Yeah, ours is what? Like yeah,

6:07

maybe we're do. This is weird and.

6:09

Two judges said. Like you to

6:11

avoid the goes or why I like

6:13

whack is Op Two? Stopping. Friggin.

6:15

Psycho. That is crazy to me. Yeah,

6:18

yeah, no, that's that's we're. In a

6:20

fan got so bad the kids are confronting. You're saying

6:22

you're not are frickin' mom. It's almost a

6:24

floor. It's borderline abusive, emotionally abusive,

6:27

Yard who delaying. Continuously tell your kids

6:29

and reprimand them for not making this new

6:31

person their mom when they have vivid memories

6:33

of their mom. Tell. Me: What? you

6:35

front. Oh also a my

6:37

friends case it was the mother. This

6:39

that mom that was. A little.

6:43

Georgia and. I can't get into too

6:45

many details, could not figure it out and

6:47

I don't know how much she watches of

6:50

my channel and audited by yeah my basically

6:52

like. See always had

6:54

of five I see like really

6:57

cares about. My. Friend

6:59

my friend was the step kids

7:01

were as she then had to

7:04

biological kids with my friend's father

7:06

and the biological kids got very

7:08

fastly different treatment. Where gotta

7:11

say were. Treated normally. I'd

7:13

like a pretty normal upbringing and my friend was.

7:15

continuously. Like locked in her

7:17

room I'm the real like a

7:19

lock the yeah yeah like that always

7:22

and not allowed to see friends,

7:24

not allowed to the cupboards have food

7:26

were locked and she had asked

7:28

permission to eat at her house. All

7:30

my layered in why old and

7:32

the the hurt. Like

7:34

step. Siblings which happened

7:37

later and. Never. Had

7:39

died kind of experience at all. So they've actually

7:41

completely. Normal lives to do know the code to

7:43

the lox or were. Yelling date still

7:45

like for example like my

7:47

from woke up one day

7:49

and everyone was gone. No

7:51

no no nothing. cupboards, walked,

7:53

whoppers locked and sound out

7:55

Later they all went to

7:57

a family of don't have.

8:00

The family's. House for Thanksgiving

8:02

Like a whole holidays holidays. And.

8:05

My friends just like. Just

8:07

No. No can't access food kit and

8:09

didn't. Know that would. The dad

8:11

there but like you were saying. The.

8:14

You you were theorizing or lad it

8:16

wasn't rule the woman control your so

8:18

see hi as a really good relationship

8:20

with her dad and minute got completely

8:22

strange my this woman and. You

8:25

know in Syria maybe the woman was

8:28

jealous that of of my friend that

8:30

she had a relationship with. The you

8:32

know she was like at the relationship

8:34

with this new husband you know and

8:37

so it's like in psych a female

8:39

thing. So it's like move like territorialized.

8:41

Like I wanna get out be the only

8:43

female for you. Convince the dad though not

8:45

to take your does daughter. I don't

8:48

know. He slowly just got broken.

8:50

Kenosha. That's like an actual pussy

8:52

whipping. Yeah and her biological mom was

8:54

like in jail for drugs and said

8:57

psyche was. There was a sad story,

8:59

their liquid addiction and stuff so you

9:01

know who knows how broken the dad

9:03

was with. like dealing with that. A

9:05

mostly that having someone new step in

9:08

and takes the rain legion. Those that

9:10

the man and oh mama. Yeah, but like

9:12

the way she weighed smooth

9:14

things over. Like. With.

9:17

Her justification was like

9:19

so smooth. Like very

9:21

charismatic and works. It.

9:24

Made sense to hand or you. Didn't want

9:26

her to their cause like Sigma above.

9:28

Hi hon! Issued make shit up about

9:30

local My friend, like my low see, didn't

9:32

do well on her schoolwork receives. Be

9:34

talking back to me, She's she's been

9:36

being a nightmare to me, like the sewage

9:38

should make up things mentioned. From a

9:41

Thanksgiving battle. Nothing I or another one

9:43

instance that like it's I never got

9:45

to spend time with my friend during

9:47

summer she was locked in her room

9:49

the into like every single year and

9:51

like there was the last year will

9:54

me or seniors in high school we

9:56

had like this. Kidnapping.

9:58

Operation where we would like. break her out of

10:00

her house like once, at least once a week where

10:04

she would sneak out and we would

10:06

hang out on a Saturday like doing

10:08

normal hang out stuff and then

10:10

we would sneak her back in and

10:12

the stepmom found

10:14

out and put duct tape on the window

10:17

to catch her. So

10:19

that was crazy and then she still broke

10:22

out and then like the cops found

10:24

her under a ride because like she was

10:26

waiting, she was going to walk home and

10:28

the cops found her like past curfew and

10:31

they were like where do you live and that

10:33

she got found out that way. Yeah.

10:37

So that was rough but yeah,

10:39

my mom always like felt

10:42

terrible, wanted to adopt her. I

10:45

was at first thinking that it was

10:47

that situation but then I was like

10:50

well maybe the dad's actually the psycho

10:52

because in that situation because like

10:54

he seems like he's the one pushing that

10:56

narrative and agenda like on to his

10:58

kids and wife. Yeah

11:02

that was a good one though huh? Yeah. Yeah

11:04

that was a good one. Good start. Okay. Good

11:07

one. Thank you. A plus. I

11:11

need to hear that. Thank you. Okay are you

11:13

ready? Yeah. Am I the asshole for not defending

11:15

mother-in-law after she kept saying my daughter looks

11:17

nothing like me? Why are these

11:19

all mom ones? I don't know. Maybe

11:21

even a mommy mood you know. Yeah you're in a mommy mood. I'm in

11:23

a mommy mood. Alright check this out. I'm

11:26

not sure what crawled up my mother-in-law's ass but her and

11:28

I got along really well before I

11:30

got pregnant. She called me her daughter, came

11:32

over to see me all the time, called me randomly just

11:34

to talk, told me she loves me all the time etc.

11:37

but after I got pregnant something switched. She

11:39

stopped calling. She never said I love you back when I said it.

11:42

She only came over to see my husband and nine times out of

11:44

ten, it was trying to get

11:46

him out of the house to go with her. Nobody

11:48

gives me hello goodbye in passing. She even

11:51

tried staying in the labor and delivery room

11:53

after she was already told no because quote

11:55

her baby needs support and clung to my

11:57

husband's arm. Several times. trying

12:00

to get him to go sit on the couch with her

12:02

instead of standing by me where he was and she got

12:04

kicked out by the nurses. Since

12:06

I had my daughter three months ago, she has come over

12:09

a good 10 to 15 times as Lily

12:11

only held my kid twice. She

12:14

just follows my husband around everywhere and still tries

12:16

to get him to leave with her to go

12:18

do chores slash tasks with her, changing tires, changing

12:21

oil, fixing her computer, moving her

12:23

around her house, etc. And

12:25

honestly, none of that bothers me as much as

12:27

her comments about how my daughter looks nothing like

12:29

me and looks exactly like her and

12:31

my husband. Ooh, this is a

12:34

weird mommy mood. My

12:36

mommy mood is taking me to the dangerous place.

12:39

He is spitting images of his father, his

12:41

mom's short, blonde, brown eyes. He has super

12:43

tall, black hair, green eyes. You

12:45

can't tell the related at all. She insists

12:47

my daughter looks just like her and my husband

12:50

and nothing like me. That's a

12:52

wild statement. That's a weird thing to say. Doesn't

12:54

she look just like us and nothing like you? She

12:58

made these comments more times than I can count and I just

13:00

give a yeah, okay, Becky, and leave it. But

13:03

yesterday, I hosted dinner for the

13:05

family and obviously invited her. She shows up with a

13:07

scrapbook album with a bunch of photos of her and

13:09

my husband from birth to present. She

13:12

was showing and telling everyone who would listen that my daughter

13:14

was basically not even mine if you go off of looks.

13:17

My husband spoke up a few times with

13:19

a clip. She actually looks

13:21

just like my wife, but his mom didn't acknowledge him. So

13:25

she takes that personally. But

13:27

then she got to my mom and my mom being

13:30

a, quote, no bullshit woman. I

13:32

like that. Said, are you blind or

13:34

are you just being ignorant? The

13:37

girl looks just like my daughter and nothing like

13:39

you. Kind of weird to me that you are

13:41

desperately pushing the narrative that the baby looks like

13:43

your son and you, considering your son looks nothing

13:45

like you either. Ooh,

13:47

I like the mom. She's fiesty. No one in

13:49

the house said anything, but a few of them

13:51

were chuckling. My husband also didn't say anything, but

13:54

he looked more like a deer in the headlights

13:56

than anything else. My mother-in-law then left. Good. You

13:59

don't know where I'm at on this. Yeah,

14:01

she group texted my husband. I later on saying

14:03

she will never forgive us for not defending her

14:05

again my mom Making

14:08

a scene and embarrassing her in front of everyone.

14:10

I don't feel bad. My husband does am I

14:12

the asshole? Yeah,

14:15

no, no you're not asshole Why

14:18

would you ever be the asshole? This

14:20

is like you're venting like Jafar You're venting

14:22

and you want support and I understand that

14:24

but like you don't genuinely think you're an

14:26

asshole the situation Because

14:28

you're not and you can't possibly be

14:30

but yeah, it's pretty pretty weird What's that

14:32

syndrome called where the mom is in love with

14:34

the Sun? I

14:37

don't want to know it's like a it's such

14:39

of an e I'll look

14:41

it up later, but very

14:43

smart if you knew it's like a Sounds

14:48

like we're getting really kind of a derma derma. It's

14:50

not a But

14:54

anyway, it's like a it's like a thing where

14:56

like the mom is like this is weird incest

14:58

stuff Sounding it's

15:00

like it's like a man chosen

15:02

by proxy Thing

15:05

which is where you make your kid rely on you because you're

15:07

making them sick you make them sick Yeah, I had to

15:09

rely on you. It's it's similar to like that sort of

15:11

a disorder where it's like you're

15:13

like It's a mother-son thing

15:16

Specifically though like where it's

15:18

like the moms in love with the Sun

15:20

someone named alternative cash says this is a

15:22

second My mother-in-law doing weird emotional incest after

15:24

her youngest child slash my husband

15:26

right after I got pregnant story I've seen

15:28

within two days. This is weirdly common reaction

15:30

or fake Well,

15:33

okay, the the fact that she changed after

15:35

the pregnancy is what's weird to me Like

15:38

the person OP is saying that like

15:41

they had a great relationship before getting pregnant Yeah, and

15:43

so I'm trying to dissect that psychologically I'm

15:45

like and I'm not a psychologist this is

15:47

all theory by the way all of this

15:49

for entertainment purposes purposes only but um Like

15:52

I was like, well, maybe she misses

15:54

being a mom and the like her

15:57

son Having a baby is

15:59

making her a grandma She doesn't want to be

16:01

a grandma. She's like Mrs. Being a mom. So now she's like

16:03

bonding with her son again in like a mother-son

16:06

way But then the weird more marks are those

16:08

are really weird. We're super weird Like why

16:11

are you trying to alienate the ill-tempered

16:13

old woman says not the asshole. You took her

16:15

baby away for real now She

16:17

always wanted to be to continue being central to

16:20

her baby's world. Yeah, I think that's pretty good

16:22

Yeah, that's that's it. But but the part that

16:24

threw me was that she was totally normal before this.

16:26

Yeah It's like something

16:29

about the pregnancy triggered it because that's where

16:31

we see the switch, right and then I'm

16:33

like, okay well, what could possibly be the

16:36

reason for the switch and the only thing I could

16:38

think of is like She

16:40

wants her baby back because she remembers being a mom

16:42

and when she had it when he was a baby

16:44

and she was the mommy You

16:46

know hell of an emotional flip though Yeah,

16:49

it is. It's strange. It's definitely

16:51

deranged. Yeah Yeah, that's

16:55

that's pretty wild although

16:57

I Would

17:00

say I remember when my

17:02

nephew was born Yeah my nephew

17:04

looks just like my I did

17:06

when I was a baby and and Everyone

17:09

and my family was saying that and like I said

17:11

that it too like and I even pulled like old

17:13

baby pictures And I didn't

17:15

realize I think that it kind of And

17:21

once I realized that I stopped saying it

17:24

but like he did look exactly like my

17:26

baby pictures Which my brother looks just looks

17:28

just like me Like we were kind of

17:30

like spitting images of each other when we

17:32

were at the same age age points Yeah,

17:34

I've almost made out with your brother many times. Hmm. I've almost made

17:36

out with your brother many times. Yeah, definitely I mean

17:39

like we totally look exactly like but like

17:41

when we were kids when he was to

17:43

he looked like how I looked When I

17:45

was to you know, it was like that

17:47

So it makes sense that like his son

17:49

would look like that But it looked more

17:52

like my baby pictures than his baby pictures

17:54

And so it's just an interesting thing also

17:56

when I took pictures holding him like I

17:58

got weird congratulations method messages People wouldn't

18:00

see me in a long time that he was my

18:02

son and I was like But

18:05

yeah, so I can see it being an innocent thing,

18:07

too But the this this

18:10

seems malicious. Yeah, that's actually malicious

18:12

What you did see that you're upsetting

18:14

the person like you keep going on and on

18:16

about it It's like she's trying to do I was

18:18

never like that my nephew looks nothing

18:20

like his mom You know, I was thinking it

18:22

in and twist. It's weird. I can't in and twist

18:24

in a big time. I don't like that. Yeah Okay,

18:28

next one I

18:30

am always curious about what people

18:32

think about this. Okay, am

18:34

I the asshole for not being happy

18:37

to receive a handmade gift? Oh

18:42

my god, that's so funny. That's a

18:44

great title Me

18:46

and my friends got together for a late Christmas gathering and

18:48

we did secret sand with a budget of $250 That's

18:52

a pretty beefy one. Yeah Juicy

18:54

I think that's like my whole Christmas budget a

18:57

hundred percent Well, it was

18:59

not a not so secret Santa where we knew

19:01

who each other who each person got

19:03

But it was so we would

19:05

only buy one person gifts. So no one would

19:07

go OTT what's that

19:09

mean? Over the

19:11

over the god fucking people

19:13

are ready. I don't know over the threshold

19:16

over the threshold whatever fucking really fucking just

19:19

Just it's your typing already

19:21

not a common acronym Jesus,

19:23

okay Edit

19:26

for info I guess they say the budget was 250

19:28

as in the expectation was each person spends that

19:30

amount It wasn't a max 250 budget where you

19:33

can spend within your means Plus this

19:35

person has a higher paying job than me is

19:37

better off financially as well And the whole friendship

19:39

group agreed to this amount months before I also

19:41

saw gifts She gave to her own family

19:44

which she posted on insta and all they were all

19:46

of them were branded items Okay context.

19:48

Okay. Okay. That is good content. I spent

19:50

the $250 and bought my secrets in a

19:52

Dior silk scarf Dior

19:55

Oblique Mitza Mitza scarf to

19:57

be precise. Okay Bougie. I

20:00

know she had been eyeing up for a while. I.

20:03

Was excited to see my gifts and serfaty I

20:05

was quite a lot so it should be enough

20:07

to get a good gifts. Everyone else got some

20:09

sort of branded item either be skincare, make up

20:11

accessories. However, when I have my gift is all

20:13

handmade items. It. Was to resin coasters

20:15

which weren't made very well. I can

20:18

see the bubbles. Some bracelets

20:20

me out of yarn does France abrasives

20:22

you have when you're younger. We're on

20:24

our forties and a crusade. Turtle and

20:26

painting she did. I think it's watercolor.

20:28

I. Jokingly asked her house costs hundred fifty

20:30

dollars and see dead serious responded that the

20:33

kids costs money and crocheted animals are sold

20:35

for quite a lot of the i for

20:37

a happy for her yes and is giving

20:39

you the product of her hobby that she

20:42

paid for for herself. Pretty amazing. Yeah no

20:44

Life had the audacity. She

20:47

says as the the decrease in animals are

20:49

sold for quite a bit on cyclic at

20:51

the weather. ah ah. Ah

20:53

ah. And a bespoke

20:55

commission painting is priceless. Now

20:59

I understand it's a thought that counts and as she couldn't

21:01

afford to have the I would have understood. But.

21:03

It's not that she couldn't afford. It is sad

21:05

to give these as because you want to quote

21:07

try making them. It's like you didn't want to

21:09

just put does used in what does junks. You

21:11

gave it to me near. You wanted to do

21:14

the hobby and then you're like what is caught.

21:16

Caught his car, saw it. sounds. Gonna give these

21:18

images of an odd reason is guess apparently

21:20

I really upset her by not be happy

21:22

but when I received but honestly as it

21:24

out as a city or Starbucks gift card

21:26

or would have been have peace. I.

21:28

Was so ready they the person be

21:30

like see that asshole for not like

21:33

ago made give. Way up the

21:35

I know right i his ear

21:37

pretty moderate. Everyone said

21:39

I was overreacting to the it's a decent

21:41

gift but that's because the aga good shit.

21:45

Out have we treat all my guess that

21:47

your scarf back but she obviously said no.

21:49

Hope. At

21:52

the maze that's hilarious of Gray wanted

21:54

to come back onto the star salaries

21:56

that your friend. That's. Wild Some

21:59

also. That's it. crazy secret Santa

22:01

budget. Yeah that's that's unless

22:03

they're all like just pulling in so

22:06

much money. Yeah. But like that's insane

22:08

like I don't I've never spent

22:10

that much I guess they're only if you

22:13

if you spread it out like let's say they have

22:15

five friends you spend 50 bucks on each friend so

22:17

I guess like instead of doing that you're just spending

22:19

250 on one friend. Right. So I

22:21

guess that makes a little bit more sense. It

22:23

does. Still it's like now I have to think

22:25

of a really expensive item for my friend instead

22:27

of just giving from like my heart

22:30

like well this is something I think

22:32

they would enjoy but it doesn't cost that much so you

22:35

know. This is kind of the sick thing about having

22:37

four some three siblings as a kid. Yeah. It's like

22:39

Christmas time it'd be like. You guys share your friends.

22:41

It's just all like well yeah we share our friends

22:43

first of all. Yeah. For sure. But like then it's

22:45

like okay well once we you know me and my

22:48

sister like started making a little bit of money. Yeah.

22:50

Oh shit we can get Nate and

22:52

Kenny like we can combine our money and instead of

22:54

getting them small things we can get them like a

22:56

big bigger thing. Yeah. And that was cool. That is

22:58

cool. Yeah. Yeah I am

23:01

so much older than my brother and I

23:03

also started working at a really young age

23:05

like I started modeling when

23:07

I was eight. It's not

23:09

the drag. You were sexy. I

23:11

was very sexy. So

23:14

yeah I was modeling in kids catalogs and and

23:17

I got like $500 for it and and

23:20

that was in the 90s. Pretty wild. It was

23:22

in the 90s. So huge change. It was like oh

23:24

my god so much money for a kid and I

23:26

bought a Sega Genesis but then like I kind of

23:28

just had that money in savings and whenever

23:30

there was like a friend's birthday or Christmas or

23:34

my brother's whatever I spent

23:36

out of my own money. Yeah. Like so they

23:38

got their parents would give them a $20 bill

23:40

or whatever. I went to my savings account and

23:42

I would pull out a 20 from my own

23:44

money. That's really good. So my presence were like

23:49

super expensive but they were out of my they were out

23:51

of my own money. Yeah. And my

23:54

brother you know like I could never expect

23:56

that in return but I didn't I

23:58

don't have the gift lovely. Like I

24:00

like to give gifts but receiving gifts like

24:03

is nice. It's like anything you give

24:05

me is nice I really don't have like Yeah,

24:09

exactly. So I

24:11

didn't really care that my brother couldn't like give

24:14

me a gift back for a

24:16

while I've ever been offended about Christmas

24:19

related anything this is the year I got my sister

24:21

a fucking Roomba Uh-huh, and then I showed up the

24:24

next year and she didn't even open the damn thing.

24:26

It was like a $550 Roomba

24:28

dude. Yeah, and she didn't even open

24:31

it Oh my gosh, and it's like

24:33

and then and I'm like busting her

24:35

balls and Jeff's balls about it My

24:37

brother-in-law and they're like Jen,

24:39

of course, you know, my sister's like fucking Insane

24:42

person. Yeah, like well, we

24:44

have the baby and like I didn't want to if I'm holding her and

24:46

I trip and fall In the room, but it's like dude, you can schedule

24:48

this shit It can it can you

24:50

can skill the shit so that it's going off while

24:53

you're dead asleep upstairs Yeah, talking about yeah, but like,

24:55

you know, just the greens are the worst the greens

24:57

are the fucking worst Okay. Well, I would

24:59

say to you like if you're gonna give a gift

25:01

you can't like have Criteria

25:04

around it like the person it's their gift to

25:06

enjoy it like they get they want to ignore it

25:08

Yeah, like they get to do that. So you need

25:10

to settle down Guess you

25:13

think it's what I never got her a gift after

25:15

that six hundred dollars been six. Okay. That was your

25:17

choice She didn't ask you for a six-dollar gift.

25:20

Yeah, you chill the fuck out I

25:22

am kind of on the I don't I wouldn't

25:24

agree with like not opening it but like once

25:26

you give a gift You'd

25:28

unless they specifically asked for a Roomba

25:31

and then they didn't open it or

25:33

whatever What would be changed forever in a positive way?

25:35

But they never asked for it They needed a room

25:37

and if you want to give a gift you have to

25:39

give it and that it's not yours anymore You don't get

25:41

to judge what they do. Okay crystal shit with

25:43

me pal. No, it's ice. That's how I feel No,

25:46

no, no because what like somebody kind of

25:49

my gift someone gives me an expensive gift and

25:51

I don't necessarily open it right away Like now

25:53

I'm supposed to feel guilty about it Even though

25:55

I didn't ask it's like a burden is now

25:57

placed on me like you sure giving a burden

26:00

I gave her a vacuum cleaner. Yeah, and she

26:02

needed it. Yeah, and that's nice But

26:04

now you don't get to police it It's

26:06

her gift. I get to police it

26:09

if I want to give her a gift again You

26:11

better fucking believe it. I don't know if you

26:13

were writing the M on the asshole. I'd be like you're

26:15

the asshole I know you would you know

26:17

what people on reddit would have my fucking back

26:19

sure people read it or cheap I

26:21

can see both sides But I

26:23

am of the philosophy that if

26:25

you give a gift Then

26:28

it's Marie you don't get to fucking

26:32

Be mad about it thankful

26:34

for the memory you had with it No, it's

26:36

not Marie Kondo thing that's completely different. But

26:38

the only time I've ever been mad at

26:41

Christmas gifts Was and

26:43

this is again. It's not the

26:45

gift. It's it's a principle So

26:49

I picked up bass guitar playing and I was

26:51

obsessed It was like, you know how I am

26:53

with hockey like when I find an obsession like

26:55

I'm obsessed and I my friend my best Friend

26:57

played guitar and my boyfriend played drums and they

26:59

needed a bassist and I spent and I got

27:01

a bass guitar from my aunt who got it

27:03

from like she was always around hanging around bands

27:05

and stuff and The

27:07

only problem with it was it didn't have an

27:09

amp So it was an electric bass guitar

27:11

that I couldn't hear so I learned it all But

27:14

can never hear what I was learning like you

27:16

mean you could barely know Exactly

27:18

and so like I the only time I got to hear

27:21

it was when I go to my friend's house and we

27:23

plug it into her amp and then I got to like

27:25

play with her and like then I

27:27

got to hear if like the reward for

27:29

my studying and stuff,

27:31

but I didn't get to practice at home listening

27:33

to the sound and And

27:36

so all I wanted for Christmas was an

27:38

ant. That's all I wanted just a small

27:40

$200 amp Like that's

27:42

I couldn't afford it at this point. I was

27:44

like 15 I couldn't afford it But like

27:47

I was trying to save for one but like that

27:49

would have been like that was the only thing I

27:51

asked for Only I wanted and

27:54

I thought for sure I was gonna get it because

27:56

I didn't want anything else That's all I wanted and

27:58

I didn't get it But not only did

28:00

I not get it, not only did I not get it, the

28:05

excuse was that they didn't want it to

28:07

be too loud. Of course, that's survival. You can

28:09

put headphones into it, which is

28:12

what my friend did to practice at home. But not

28:14

only that, my brother gets

28:16

a drum set for Christmas. Get the hell out.

28:18

A fucking drum set. Get the hell out. What the hell

28:20

is louder than a drum set? Nothing, you can't plug in

28:22

drums? You can't even fucking plug in the headphones to a

28:24

drum set? You can't plug in drums? No, and, no. That's

28:26

the million dollar idea. Not only that, he

28:29

didn't give a shit about drums. He

28:32

didn't ask to play drums. He wasn't trying

28:34

to play drums. He wasn't obsessed with

28:36

playing drums. And do you know how much?

28:38

Sexist. Guess how much he played the

28:40

drums? Zero. He

28:42

did it that day. Yeah. And

28:44

then nothing. And by the way, my

28:47

boyfriend at the time, my boyfriend at the time,

28:49

he was a very proficient

28:51

drummer and he gave drum lessons. Here we go

28:53

again. And he tried to give my brother drum

28:55

lessons and my brother had no fucking interest. He

28:57

just thought drums were cool. He said

29:00

it maybe one time, like that drums were

29:02

cool. They got him a drum set. That's

29:04

insane. Aren't drums as expensive as shit too? I

29:06

guess they got a discount on it from whatever, like

29:09

my aunt or whatever, but like. I remember wanting a

29:11

drum set when I was a kid, my parents would never know what happened.

29:13

I didn't get, the only thing

29:15

I asked for was the bass guitar. That's

29:17

wild. For the reason that it would make

29:19

too much noise. Like, that was the tilting

29:21

part. It was like, none of it made

29:23

sense. Have you converted your parents to play this?

29:25

Oh yeah, they fucking know. I tried

29:28

to hide crying, but I could not.

29:30

You can't do that. I could not. It wasn't

29:32

about like me being ungrateful for like. Of course

29:34

not. The gifts or like not getting what

29:36

I wanted for Christmas. It

29:39

was like, it just seemed like a slap in

29:41

the face. It is. Like it wasn't like, oh

29:43

I didn't get what I wanted for Christmas. It

29:45

was like, no, no, no. The principle of it

29:47

that you, I didn't get what I

29:49

wanted for Christmas, and that's okay,

29:51

but then you give him something that's

29:53

the opposite reason. Noise gear. Why

29:56

I didn't get my gift. And then,

29:58

yeah, I was just like. I was so

30:00

resentful of that. I had never been

30:03

mad about a gift or not getting a

30:05

gift before, but that fucking year I was,

30:08

ugh. Is that when you quit

30:10

on bass guitar? Yeah. Yeah. I

30:13

know in you, you probably would. I mean, I tried

30:15

to continue, but how fucking fun is it

30:17

to keep continue? And then every time

30:19

I picked it up, I was just fucking mad. Yeah.

30:21

I just peed it. It took the joy

30:23

out of it. I was just so mad. And

30:26

then I finally got a hand-me-down amp, but

30:28

it was like wonky, where it only worked

30:30

some of the time. It

30:33

was like super small, and you couldn't plug

30:35

headphones into it. So I had to listen

30:37

to it on the lowest volume. It

30:40

was just so annoying. I was just so, it was so

30:42

frustrating. I was the most, I've never been mad about

30:45

not receiving it, but

30:48

that was the only time that I had

30:50

a bad gift taste in my mouth.

30:53

Dude, next year at Sweeney Christmas, I'm

30:55

gonna gift you an amp. I don't want it. And

30:58

then you can be a bit, and then you can

31:00

have an overly emotional response, and then we can pwn

31:02

your parents. Also, someone stole

31:04

that bass guitar. Oh, that

31:07

sucks. Yeah, I don't have it anymore. Damn, I've

31:09

never seen it. Yeah, well, I used to

31:11

have it as decoration because I never fucking bought an amp,

31:14

but I just kept it for the mems, right? And

31:16

then when I was cleaning out my studio apartment when

31:18

I was moving in with you. That's right. You used

31:21

to have it on the wall. Yeah, so. The

31:23

red one. I told this guy that we couldn't

31:26

take all the furniture, so take what was

31:28

in there, and I didn't

31:31

grab that before I left. Oh,

31:34

right. I hadn't grabbed it yet, and

31:37

I didn't really realize it until

31:39

we were unpacking at your house,

31:41

and I was like, all right, well, I mean,

31:43

it was a lot of mems, but I didn't

31:46

really play it in a while, so I guess

31:49

it's fine, and I've made peace with it, but

31:51

yeah. Yeah, I remember that. Yeah, so he made

31:53

out with my fucking bass guitar. All right, gift to

31:55

the guy. Yeah. And speaking

31:57

of what we're gonna make out right. now

32:00

so we'll be right back after this break. We're

32:02

going to make out. It's a new year folks.

32:04

We're adding romance to the life. You're

32:07

back. Hi

32:10

everyone, I'm Nolan Sykes and I'm one of the hosts

32:12

of Past Gas. Past Gas brings

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And we're back, okay Next

36:10

am I the asshole topic am

36:12

I the asshole for not being happy when my

36:14

boyfriend ditched me for a free trip to Mexico?

36:17

Okay Context

36:20

my boyfriend and I live in the same city,

36:22

but on opposite sides I go to his house

36:24

most weekends with my daughter and we stay most

36:26

holidays at his place I'm basically only at my

36:28

apartment on school nights We intend to move in

36:31

together once my daughter finishes the school year for

36:33

my daughter's winter break We discussed that we would

36:36

stay the full break through January 9th yesterday

36:38

January 4th My boyfriend was asked

36:40

by his family most of which were already in

36:42

Cabo if they paid for his ticket Would

36:45

he come on the trip? He immediately said

36:47

hell? Yes, when I found out my

36:49

feelings were extremely hurt from my point of view He just

36:51

completely went back on his commitment for me and my daughter

36:53

to stay at his place through her break He

36:56

told me to just stay at his house while he

36:58

was gone and he replied that he would need help

37:00

watching his dogs Feel

37:03

strongly that his assumption I would stay and

37:05

watch his dogs is inconsiderate But I'm

37:07

also hurt that he basically dished me and my daughter for

37:09

a free trip to Cabo He's

37:12

made several statements that he can't believe I'm not happy

37:14

for him So am I the

37:16

asshole for not being happy that the trip is free

37:18

even though his choice caused me and my daughter emotional

37:20

pain. I Guess

37:23

I would need just a lot more context

37:26

Cuz I think I'm sick.

37:28

I want to be on her side

37:31

I want to be on her side I know

37:33

but free and like immediately my

37:35

impulse reaction is like fuck that guy

37:38

is an asshole Sure, but if I

37:40

really put myself in both

37:42

people's shoes I Mean

37:47

he got offered a free trip like I

37:49

don't know yeah, and this isn't like first of

37:51

all This isn't like he's canceling Christmas to go to cop.

37:53

Yeah, this is like it's your daughter's

37:55

winter break It's not significant to him unless

37:58

he's like Like her

38:00

dad, like it was a different scenario where it's

38:02

like, oh, her dad is ditching her or something

38:04

but it's not and like how long have you

38:06

been dating? Right. Also,

38:09

I feel like from his point of view,

38:11

his commitments were that she was able to

38:13

stay there for the winter break, right?

38:16

Yeah, like whatever. Like that, he was and

38:18

he's like, yeah, you can still stay at the house. Yeah,

38:20

you go for it. I'm going to

38:22

Cabo. I'm with him. I kind of am with him.

38:24

I'm completely with him. I think she, I don't

38:26

think she's like an asshole. I think it's like

38:29

a FOMO thing. Like, oh man, like I don't

38:31

get to go on the trip with you. Well sure, but he's going

38:33

to buy a ticket for the daughter too. Yeah. Give

38:35

me a break. Unfortunately, like, you

38:38

know, your daughter's your responsibility. Like,

38:40

I don't know. I

38:42

could have been not, I'm kind of in the middle. I

38:44

just don't care. Let's say this guy's name

38:47

is Kevin. Yeah. You can't blame

38:49

Kevin when life's coming up, Kevin. Life's coming up,

38:51

Kevin. Life's coming up, Kevin and he's like, I'm

38:53

cashing my, I'm punching my ticket. Dude, life came

38:55

in for me. The ship came in, I'm punching

38:57

my fucking ticket. I'm going to Cabo. And

38:59

also it just doesn't sound like super serious

39:01

yet. No, yeah. Like, if you're

39:03

still like your boyfriend and girlfriend, you've been dating.

39:05

Who would do this to where it's

39:07

their kid? Yeah. And so they

39:10

overemphasize everything as if it has the same significance

39:12

to you where it's not your kid. Yeah. And

39:15

so she keeps on saying her

39:17

break. He committed to staying with

39:19

us for her break. Yeah. It's

39:22

like, who gives a fuck? Yeah. It's like,

39:24

cool. It's January 9th. Get

39:27

the fuck out of here. Although like asking her to

39:29

take care of his dogs is kind of. Well,

39:31

she's staying there for free. Yeah. So

39:34

go for it. Can you also like carry and pick

39:36

my dog out twice a day or what? I guess

39:38

I missed. Why does she have to stay there?

39:40

Why did she stay there rather than her? They

39:42

live in the same city on opposite sides. On opposite

39:44

sides. And on most holidays they stay at his place.

39:46

Oh, okay. On most holidays. So

39:49

it's like he's breaking a tradition maybe. I

39:51

guess. It's okay. I didn't know. Her

39:53

daughter finishes the school year. But

39:56

they're not moved in. But they're not moved in. I don't know.

39:58

It just seems like a good thing. like a one-off to

40:01

me like it's not like this guy's like fucking

40:03

off every weekend or doesn't sound like

40:05

it. Yeah, like Cabo Yeah,

40:08

if he was going to Atlantic City, I'd be like,

40:10

yeah She didn't list reasons like oh well He's

40:12

been known to have a wandering eye and like

40:14

when he gets around these yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah,

40:16

like if there was context like that maybe I

40:19

could build a case More

40:21

for her, but it sounds like if he's just

40:23

like a good dude and he got a

40:25

free trip I don't know I'm with this guy a

40:27

hard time like I was gonna live it up and

40:30

have fun I'm thinking he's that much of an asshole

40:32

Dude, do you think this guy's just like hell? Yeah,

40:34

I'm gonna Cabo and then he just keeps him sending

40:36

her pictures of Cabo and he's like isn't this so

40:38

sick Well,

40:40

he's just oblivious. Yeah, I guess I would need

40:42

more reasons to feel like he's being like

40:44

babe, babe Look where else I get to

40:46

go. Babe. Babe. Look at the white sand

40:49

beaches. I Like this

40:51

guy. Oh, what are the I bet the comments on

40:53

her side, right? The comment the

40:55

first comment I was surprised. Oh, you're the

40:57

asshole. I know it sounds harsh, but you're

40:59

coming off as emotionally dependent. Okay

41:02

Someone was polite. So if you

41:04

had holiday plans and your partner says anyway,

41:06

I'm off to do my own thing You'd

41:09

be chill about it. This is what this

41:11

person doesn't understand. It's not a holiday. No

41:13

January 9th is not a holiday It's her

41:15

daughter's winter. It's a babysitting. It has no

41:17

significance to him. No ever no Redditors

41:20

dude, you know it I mean you could

41:22

also make the case which she didn't put in

41:24

there But like if I was writing this post

41:26

like to build my case a little bit I'd be like

41:29

I needed extra help taking care of my daughter because I'm trying

41:31

to work too or whatever You know, like

41:33

if there was something like that Were

41:37

he like committed to helping her with something

41:39

or whatever? I agree But like it sounds

41:41

like she's kind of fine and just is

41:43

kind of just mad that he's going on

41:46

trips Yeah, and like so

41:48

it was gonna be a staycation and

41:50

yeah across town That

41:53

sucks anyway. Yeah, it's like completely sucks.

41:55

Go home I wonder what it

41:57

would have been like the other way around if her and her daughter got offered

41:59

a trip and not the guy if

42:01

she would have been like, if

42:03

she would have taken the trip. I think so too. If

42:06

she didn't, she's dumb. Yeah. And

42:08

I hate her. I'm pretty sure that if she got a trip paid

42:10

for her and her daughter. She

42:13

would take it. If she didn't, I'd take it. I

42:16

would take it. I'd take it. And I wouldn't

42:18

take you. I know. You

42:21

wouldn't have the much fun without me. You could watch my cats.

42:23

You wouldn't have the much fun. You could watch my cats. You'd

42:25

miss me too much. Yeah. Honestly,

42:29

true because like exploring new

42:31

places with other people is not

42:34

as like a fraction of

42:36

the experience when we

42:38

get to go to new places together. Can't

42:41

wait till the end of the year. Our end of the year trip is going

42:43

to be lit. Sick. We're going to go to the Bahamas? Yeah,

42:45

probably. Okay. Hell yeah. That's

42:48

what I'm thinking too. For my birthday.

42:50

That's what I'm thinking. Yeah. Okay.

42:53

Okay, here we go. Okay. This one's going

42:55

to be good. Okay. And this is pertinent to you.

42:58

Oh shit. Am I the asshole for telling

43:00

my bridesmaid that she can't wear the same

43:02

hairstyle as me for my wedding? Oh,

43:04

interesting. Okay. My

43:07

25 female and bridesmaid 25

43:09

female. Nola

43:11

says she does not like the hairstyle I

43:13

have picked for the bridesmaids and is going

43:15

to be wearing the same hairstyle as me.

43:18

When I told her no, she got very upset. My

43:21

bridesmaids are wearing a messy bun and I'll

43:23

be having my hair down in Hollywood waves.

43:27

Her contacts, we've known each other nearly five years but

43:29

haven't kept in touch much in the last two. The

43:31

only reason she's a bridesmaid is because she called me

43:33

up on a promise I made her three years ago

43:35

saying I'd made her my bridesmaid when

43:37

we got married. Holy shit. Okay. So

43:40

she should extra defer to you but it's, we'll get there. I'm

43:42

really bad at saying no. So I said

43:44

yes. I got her the

43:46

bridesmaid outfit and accessories. I am paying for

43:49

everything. Oh. They are paying for their own

43:51

hair and makeup. Okay. Nola has already

43:53

said she doesn't like the bridesmaids outfit and asked

43:55

me to change it. What? I

43:59

was unable to. as my other bridesmaids love

44:01

theirs and the dresses were non-refundable. Duh.

44:05

I also asked my bridesmaids to wear any color

44:07

of the rainbow to my bridal shower and

44:09

told them I'm wearing white. Nola said

44:11

I'm wearing pink. Me, I

44:14

said I'm sorry but pink isn't a rainbow color. Do

44:17

you want to pick something else? And she

44:19

said fine I'll wear white. What? Me,

44:22

that's not a rainbow color either and I'm wearing white.

44:24

How about you wear green? Nola, I'll think about it.

44:27

I've already asked her to cater to

44:29

my above requests, not changing the bridesmaid

44:31

dress and wearing a rainbow color

44:33

for her bridal shower and only the asshole

44:35

for asking her not to wear her hair like mine and

44:38

wear it like the rest of the bridesmaids. Does

44:40

she know what being a bridesmaid even is? Sounds

44:42

like she doesn't and she also like

44:44

invited herself. Yeah. This is wild.

44:47

You're the bridesmaid. Yeah. You're the maid.

44:50

She needs to be kicked out. To the bride.

44:52

This is too many violations. The bride needs something. You're

44:54

the person. You're not the bride. You don't

44:57

get to make rules. That's right. You're the

44:59

fucking help. You're like your bridesmaid. We got to

45:01

buy it on the show. You got to buy it on the show. We got

45:03

to be expert. Finally. And from all

45:05

accounts that I've heard, I was the fucking

45:07

chillest bride ever because I had no preconceived

45:09

notions of what I didn't know how any

45:12

of it worked at all because I had

45:14

never been to a wedding before in my

45:16

adult life. So like all

45:19

of it was new to me and I was very

45:21

freeform with my bridesmaids. I was like, oh

45:23

yeah, here's the color. Like I wanted navy

45:25

blue dresses. You guys pick whatever dress

45:27

you feel comfortable in. I don't care where you

45:29

get it from. I don't care like how

45:32

long it is or what style something

45:34

you feel comfortable in. That is

45:36

navy. That was my only rules. Love

45:39

it. Tanya even asked if she could wear

45:41

like a peach belt or

45:44

whatever, like a peach sash. I was like,

45:46

sure. Like I don't fucking care. And

45:49

I actually didn't even know like

45:51

protocol with dyeing your hair natural

45:54

color. So Like one of

45:56

my bridesmaids like showed up with

45:58

bright fucking blue. Purple

46:00

Play Clown Bright blue.

46:03

It freshly died. Of

46:05

should I bring hair. And at first

46:07

it is a given the other of a because she

46:09

had she had been dying or her crazy colors in

46:11

the past and in Nyc not. Until

46:13

read the til that wedding that legs

46:15

she hadn't had. A. Friend as an observer

46:17

at her natural. Hair color and almost blew The

46:19

grown Our room. so it was it. Like.

46:21

Seats doubling change that for the wedding

46:23

and she even said that she like

46:26

I got it done fresh for the

46:28

wedding and I didn't really know I

46:30

don't really care like mildly was letting

46:32

people express themselves authentically. Rubber Neck. My

46:34

bridesmaids are rapists and they're like. You.

46:36

Know what that in your wedding like

46:38

this is it's a distraction from you

46:40

which is was be like the main

46:43

center of focus and early care about

46:45

that part but like the pictures part.

46:47

It's. Like it just. Take. It

46:49

does really signal or focus your you for

46:52

different than any. Really? think about that. So they

46:54

had the conversation. About vinegar or moves on the end

46:56

your daily yeah my bad for the answer to your.

46:58

Hits they were like this is not. How. A

47:01

word I like we the area I was

47:03

while without a strike the as. A Oh

47:05

shit I didn't know I was being A I

47:07

did not at all and like unhappy they were

47:09

there to do that because it's definitely like would

47:11

have been. Inserted his yeah for

47:13

sure. But yeah, I

47:15

urge. To. My

47:18

bridesmaids get like no one. No one

47:20

got mad at any my choices like

47:22

I'd No one was like rebelling against

47:24

me or anything like that. But. Yeah,

47:27

I think that a I'd have

47:29

since been a bridesmaid and. Usually.

47:32

You have to pay for your own

47:34

dress and I'm your and they are

47:36

to help the bride. Stress.

47:38

Less like you're there to help things

47:40

run smoothly, help her like to have

47:42

her moment and like it's about the

47:44

bride and I love that like part.

47:47

I love helping my friends. Like where

47:49

I'm like how like to be part

47:51

of your day like that's great. I'm.

47:53

So. It's weird. To

47:56

have a Fred Macmurray motivations before the person

47:58

a super as a. Asking to wear white

48:00

you're out. I think yeah, that's 100%. You're

48:02

out. And to even. To

48:05

actually say that and not as a bit. It's not

48:07

about, it's about the principle, exactly. To

48:09

like have the audacity to be like,

48:11

to not. Okay, you don't wanna even pick one

48:13

color, I'll wear white then. Yeah. Like what

48:15

the hell are you doing? Like you know what you're

48:18

doing. And you invited yourself. You know what you're

48:20

doing. Yeah, this chick's thin ice already, like thin

48:22

ice from the jump. I do not, this person

48:24

would have been kicked out, just raw principle. Yeah,

48:26

I'm principle, you just, you just boot her. Just

48:28

sorry. Boot sentence. Sorry, not

48:30

sorry. Also my best friend kicked out of

48:32

bridesmaid because of similar things.

48:34

Yes. So, I

48:37

don't wanna speak on her behalf, but this

48:39

is like a little tidbit of tea for

48:41

someone else's wedding. But like, so

48:45

her friend, it was like similar

48:47

where the friend was like,

48:49

I wanna be your bridesmaid. Like she didn't ask

48:51

her to be a bridesmaid. It was like, I wanna be

48:53

one of your bridesmaids. So she's like, okay, I guess you

48:55

could be a bridesmaid. Sure. And

48:59

then the friend is like, making all

49:01

kinds of requests, can't come to the

49:03

bachelorette party because she has to study

49:05

for an exam she's taking a week

49:07

later. A week later. And

49:10

that's her excuse for not showing up to the bachelorette

49:12

party. Doesn't have a job, just as a student. And

49:14

like, she's like, well, I have to study. And

49:17

so, it didn't

49:19

wanna, I don't know, there was a couple other

49:21

reasons, but like she was, she basically

49:24

making a lot of demands and not showing up at

49:26

all to help. She

49:28

was making it easier on her, not hard. Yeah,

49:30

exactly. That's the whole point. So she got the boot and when I heard that,

49:32

I was like, oh yeah, that makes a lot of sense. But

49:34

yeah, I don't get what people think being a bridesmaid is.

49:37

Like it's like, you just wanna be part of, you wanna be

49:39

part of the show. Yeah. You wanna be a cast

49:41

member. I'm a special. A cast member. Yeah, on the

49:43

day, you wanna show up in the pretty dress and get

49:45

to stand up on the stage. Sorry,

49:47

excuse me, excuse me, I'm going to the stage. You

49:49

wanna be in the limo. And be like

49:52

part of it, but you don't wanna put any of the work. Correct.

49:54

Okay, get out. Get the fuck out. Get

49:57

out. I'm surprised this person hasn't kicked

49:59

her already. Yeah, they didn't

50:01

yet. Or why the person is even being like, am

50:03

I the asshole? No, bitch. They're not

50:05

the asshole. I'm saying, you're too nice if anything. Yeah, and I

50:07

get it. You're definitely not people being assholes, it sounds like. I'm

50:09

not really good at it either of like... Sometimes

50:12

in life you have to become an asshole to get what

50:14

you want. Yeah. And to stand

50:16

up for yourself as well. Or surround yourselves with

50:18

people who are asshole enough to have your back and

50:20

be assholes for you. You're welcome. I

50:22

do it all the time. Thank you. Happy

50:25

to do it. You're my asshole. I am. That's

50:28

all the time we have for today, folks. Let us know if

50:30

you disagree. If you think in

50:32

the comments, do you think we

50:34

should be harder on the guy

50:36

that took a bomb ass trip

50:38

for free to where it was

50:41

at again? Cabo. Cabo, San Lucas. San

50:43

Lucas, dude. Get out of here. Get

50:45

out of here. It's beautiful. We said what we

50:47

said. You went to Cabo this week and you had your

50:49

first kiss. No, it was a

50:51

Cancun. Cancun, same shit. Yeah, and

50:54

he touched my boob. Touched

50:57

my boob. I never had a guy touch my

50:59

boob. A lot of new experience.

51:01

A lot of fun. Glad

51:03

to hear it again. Glad to hear it. Gonna hear it

51:05

in the next episode too. Don't forget to listen to the next episode

51:07

where she'll tell you about the next guy who touched the boob. His

51:10

email was jellybean17. Don't

51:14

forget, if you like the show, help us

51:16

out on Patreon, patreon.com/sticky. Nothing helps a show

51:18

more. And man, could his hand hold a boob. And

51:20

we will see you guys on the next one. His

51:22

little 14 year old. Perfectly shaped.

51:25

Oh yeah. Alright, we're under. You

51:37

still thinking job change in the new year? Yeah,

51:39

I need something that's in high demand and more

51:41

stable in this economy. IT? Yeah,

51:43

cyber security. Maybe even AI. That's what

51:45

I did. Really? How? Went

51:48

to my computer career. months.

51:52

A lot of IT pros go to school there too

51:54

to level up. Sweet. I think you can

51:56

do it online or on campus. Both. Wow, I'll check

51:58

it out. Thanks. Take

52:00

the free career evaluation now

52:03

at mycomputercareer.edu. Financial

52:05

aid is available for qualified students including the

52:07

GI Bill. Today, we discuss Miro. Listen, when

52:09

it comes to running client workshops, the dream

52:12

of course is to get those creative juices

52:14

flowing, right? But typically what ends up happening

52:16

is thousands of hours get wasted because of

52:18

poorly facilitated meetings. So I

52:21

have Maya with me today. She's a consultant

52:23

who runs Fortune 100 workshops from leadership training

52:25

to team building and she has the insider

52:27

tip on what makes things work. Maya? Yeah,

52:29

I've been doing this a long time. My

52:32

number one tip is to bring everyone

52:34

into that visual collaboration platform. So personally,

52:36

I use Miro and it's completely changed

52:38

how I interact with the room. You

52:40

have to give people a way to

52:42

feel like they're in the room even

52:44

when they're not. That's something you can

52:46

do easily in Miro. Otherwise, they've seen

52:48

the same slides and format thousand times.

52:50

Falling asleep, eyes glazing over, yawns, all

52:52

that. Exactly. When

52:55

people follow me on the Miro board, everyone

52:57

is literally going on a journey with me.

52:59

We're adding thoughts, we're reacting and we're

53:01

voting for the best ideas. It's great.

53:04

Connective magic. I like it.