No Spain. No Argentina. No Germany. No Portugal. No.....Senegal. This week on STM, we break down how Mexico can continue this streak of giant killing against Brazil.

Personal Goals vs. Mexico Goals

Jun 25th, 2018 43m 41s

Yes, we love Mexico. We also love the US Open Cup, and the fact that the MLS season is halfway done, but DC United has only played 12 games. On this episode, Jack and Max recap CONCACAF's performance so far in the mundial, and discuss how to pl

WC Preview: 7 Good Players on Bad Teams

Jun 11th, 2018 42m 11s

This week, STM chooses 7 players on bad teams that you should be watching this World Cup. Much love to both Iran and Morocco. Also, Max and Jack discuss the likability of Englishmen.

The Hoop Has Been Lowered

May 29th, 2018 25m 52s

A quick, lunchtime pod for y'all. Max and Jack discuss USA's 3-0 win over Bolivia, and what we can all expect to see in Ireland on Saturday.

USMNT Roster, Death in the Family, and MLS Coaches Abroad

May 21st, 2018 39m 44s

After a long weekend near the Canadian border, Max and Jack return to discuss the USMNT roster. Furthermore, the two idiot brothers manage to insult all soccer fans in the process. Enjoy!

Continued Bafflement

May 20th, 2018 28m 14s

Wayne Rooney to DC, Curt Onalfo as GM, and the fizzling of Zlatan. It's a cheerful one today.

Clint and Bradley for USMNT

May 7th, 2018 58m 46s

After a two week hiatus, Max and Jack return to discuss the starting 11 vs. Bolivia. STM also has the obligatory pro/rel discussion, and dishes out their picks for next USMNT manager. Open your hearts to The Deuce.

Toronto FC = Korean Baseball

Apr 16th, 2018 41m 50s

What do Toronto FC and Korean baseball have in common? Turns out, plenty. This week on STM, Max and Jack discuss FC Dallas, the Utah Royals amazing home support, and the Gianluca Busio.

Michael Bradley Has a Mural in Chicago

Apr 9th, 2018 31m 2s

Disclaimer: We recorded this before the LA Galaxy game, so whatever Zlatan has just done, we missed it. Anyways, Soft Tattooed Millionaires are back and ready for round two of CCL. What we are not so prepared for is Jason Kreis being a giant

Interview with Tim Myers

Apr 6th, 2018 26m 55s

There is no more essential reading in American soccer right now than Tim Myers', "Quiet Lies," and "What's the Truth." Both reports detail the myriad ways in which the MLS and Anthony Precourt have manipulated the narrative around the good city

Shane Black's Biopic of Rocco Commisso

Apr 2nd, 2018 40m 1s

USMNT vs. Paraguay. The resurrection of Zlatan. STM is here to help you process the week you've just had as a fan of American soccer. Plus, Max and Jack ask, "Is there such a thing as a good soccer movie?" The answer is no, not really.

Wicked Banana Bend

Mar 26th, 2018 26m 56s

In this week's episode, Max and Jack talk NWSL, Zlatan, and some seriously bad TV announcers. There's plenty to stay positive about American soccer, though, and STM is here to make sure your glass is always half full.

Update from Austin, TX

Mar 23rd, 2018 25m 15s

Parks and Recreation has lied to us. City councils are actually really boring. Ask anyone in Austin. Or you could just ask MLS in Austin spokesperson, Derek Ensign. Luckily, this is exactly what we did. On this pod, Derek gives us a general st

Athletes aren't Cool

Mar 19th, 2018 48m 45s

Who is the coolest player in the MLS? STM try to wrap their heads around this scourge of lameness, all while reminiscing about bunk beds and potentially life-threatening illnesses.

You like goals? We got your goals right here, pal

Mar 12th, 2018 52m 28s

Holy crap! Jack and Max are blown away by just how entertaining the CCL has been this year. STM discuss the Red Bulls' CONCACAF-y victory over Tijuana, and bask in the glory of all 38 MLS goals from the weekend.

CCL is Dope, Get Over Yourselves

Mar 6th, 2018 53m 5s

Max returns from Santa Fe, Jack recaps MLS hijinks, and both boys discover something about themselves along the way. Turns out, CCL is actually everything they've ever needed.

Liga MX, we love you so

Mar 3rd, 2018 17m 41s

Jason Marquitz, producer of the Mexican Soccer Show, joins STM this week to talk about the suspension of pro/rel in Liga MX. Jack also attempts to break a world record.

MLS Preview and Prediction Show

Feb 25th, 2018 40m 56s

Harrison Crow, of American Soccer Analysis, joins us to preview the MLS season. We discuss which teams could possibly overachieve, and talk about which sides might be not quite as advertised. Who are our picks for the top of the table, and who'

Post-Breakup Eric Wynalda

Feb 19th, 2018 26m 53s

Max and Jack highlight the achievements of some of our best and brightest, all while trying very hard not to rattle Eric Wynalda's cage.

USSF Presidential Election

Feb 10th, 2018 34m 18s

STM gives their rapid reaction to the USSF presidential election.

Interview with Todd Saldaña

Jan 26th, 2018 22m 54s

LAFC academy director, Todd Saldaña, joins the podcast to talk about the youth movement at MLS' newest franchise. We also discuss what it takes to make sure that kids don't fall through the cracks, and how he intends to tackle this problem in t

Soft Tattooed Millionaires: Episode 11

Jan 25th, 2018 44m 33s

Max and Jack are back to discuss (positively) all things MLS, USSF, and Matt Christopher book reports.

Soft Tattooed Millionaires: Episode 10

Jan 15th, 2018 35m 12s

20, or Dos-a-Cero? STM discuss the Donovan announcement while trying not to explode with joy. Per usual, Max and Jack discuss all the happenings in American soccer, both domestically, and abroad.

Emergency Jonathan Gonzales Pod! feat. Adam Belz

Jan 9th, 2018 34m 37s

Adam Belz of Scuffed joins us to discuss just what exactly the departure of Jonathan Gonzales means to the USMNT. STM and Adam try to answer the age-old question: How do you mend a broken heart?