0:00

Welcome to speaking as Sex

0:02

with the Pleasure Mechanics. I'm

0:04

Chris, I'm Charlotte. We are

0:07

the Pleasure mechanics and on

0:09

this podcast we have honest,

0:12

explicit, wholesome conversations about Sachs

0:14

pleasure and the joys of

0:16

intimate connection. Com on over

0:19

to Pleasure mechanics.com where you

0:21

will find all of their

0:24

resources we have been lovingly

0:26

generating for you since two

0:28

thousand and six. When

0:31

we stepped into these

0:33

Pleasure Mechanics uniforms together

0:35

and devoted are of

0:37

lives to creating actionable,

0:39

affective. Strategies so we

0:41

can all feel more

0:43

pleasure, more joy, And

0:46

feel more of a router says

0:48

i'm. Feel more

0:50

in our bodies

0:53

and experience the

0:55

incredible ecstasies of.

0:57

Or Roddick connection. This is what

0:59

we've been about. And

1:02

we have mostly been touch

1:04

focused. Intel. Very Recently we have

1:06

been focused on erotic. Massage That

1:09

was our lineage. We have

1:11

been focused on touch and

1:13

then spanking and kink and

1:15

your kept asking. For teachings

1:18

around. Oral sex and

1:20

it is understandable. Oral sex

1:22

is a big part of a lot of

1:24

our sex lives. It's a big part of

1:26

what we crave. I'm It's

1:28

a huge part of for play

1:31

for a lot of people. For

1:33

many folks, it's how they most

1:35

reliably get off and have orgasms.

1:38

And so there was a lot

1:40

of requests for oral sex teachings

1:43

and we just. Recently released

1:45

are Oral Sex Course and

1:47

We Are Loving. seeing the

1:49

engagement with it and. You will

1:51

find it a pleasure mechanics. Com/oral

1:53

and today we wanted to

1:55

talk about something that we

1:58

both learned while curry. The

2:00

eating the course for you all. While

2:02

focusing for the past year

2:04

plus on oral sex. We

2:07

took a deep dive into oral.

2:09

I learned all about oral anatomy.

2:11

I did lots of research and

2:13

development for you all have lots

2:15

and lots. Of love I'm

2:17

and we really went deep

2:20

in conversation. With you all our

2:22

community about the realities of oral

2:24

sex for you we went to

2:26

hundreds and hundreds of survey responses

2:28

were you are shared your truths.

2:30

About. Oil And as I was

2:32

developing this course one of

2:35

the things that became really

2:37

clear to me I wanted

2:39

a missing ingredients. For amazing

2:41

oral. Sex, one of the

2:43

things that was left out

2:45

of the conversation about oral

2:48

sex, is coming into an

2:50

erotic relationship with our own.

2:53

The. Eroticism. Shin of your

2:56

mouth. This. Was such

2:58

an interesting and surprising part.

3:00

Of this journey I feel like I

3:03

have always enjoyed oral sex like it's

3:05

always been part of my life. But

3:07

when we started to really examine and

3:10

explore. This aspect, I realize that

3:12

there was so much more. Potential

3:14

in terms of my erotic

3:16

relationship with my own mouth.

3:19

And what that has opened. Up his really

3:21

delicious, interesting and a full body

3:23

experience and a different way of

3:26

relating. To the world and the

3:28

sort I love about a recessive

3:30

them. It's like ever expanding and

3:32

ever unfolding and unfurling. The more

3:35

we pay attention and bring our

3:37

awareness and. Focus to certain

3:39

parts of. Our body or certain

3:41

parts of our erotic life. Things can

3:44

unfold and. You make new

3:46

discoveries about yourself, your desires,

3:48

what you. Like what? pleasurable

3:50

and it just it becomes

3:53

a deeper relationship. I

3:55

have just been amazed. at what has

3:57

opened up since. I have been.

4:00

Right sizing my mouth and. I

4:03

wouldn't need or radha sizing our.

4:05

Mouths and so.

4:08

For any body part and

4:10

this is something we have

4:12

been developing over the twenty

4:14

years we have been so

4:16

matic sex educators many of

4:18

my first a in person

4:20

sessions. As an erotic body worker

4:22

were with people who are numb dow

4:24

who had lost. Sensation know sensation,

4:27

know feeling. No sexual response

4:29

either in their entire bodies

4:31

are in their john at

4:34

all. And. As

4:36

I thought about this with oral sex

4:39

what I realized as a lot of

4:41

us are kind of numb down orally.

4:43

We use our mouths all day long,

4:45

we talk. We eat, we swallow.

4:48

But we don't often focus on

4:50

the pleasures of our mouths as

4:53

part of our bodies weed on

4:55

so to speak. masturbate are my

4:57

house of any Even just like

5:00

how strange that is to say

5:02

like some of us have anxious

5:04

fidget that we stem with our

5:07

mouths i'm nervous behaviors with her

5:09

mouths. Some of us have. Foods

5:11

that we really enjoy, right?

5:13

So food is around that

5:15

many of us use our

5:17

mouths. For enjoyment by

5:20

do we allow that to

5:22

go. Into excitation, into

5:25

arousal. Into a source

5:27

of turn on because in

5:29

the oral sex surveys and.

5:32

In my own experience of oral sex,

5:34

what I've noticed is. I can

5:36

get very aroused and

5:38

turned on by justice

5:40

sensations in experience of

5:42

giving oral fuck. Am

5:45

I have com just from giving

5:47

and I got really curious about

5:49

this and this was reflected in

5:51

so many of the. Community. Responses

5:54

about or on so many of your

5:56

stories. Was this sense of

5:58

just? however? housing? World

6:00

can be, but what that

6:03

hates is an erotic awareness

6:05

of our own mouth, and

6:07

so many of us are

6:09

kind of numbed out or

6:11

disconnected from our mouths as

6:13

a source of erotic pleasure.

6:16

I know what a name that that has

6:19

been a journey for you. This is not

6:21

like a place you have landed out of

6:23

nowhere Spray this has been a many decades

6:25

long experience. You have. An

6:28

hour speak for you, but let's when

6:30

it into him the other people who

6:32

are not having that experience that it's

6:34

kind of incredible to just keep getting

6:36

in relationship with our mouths and allowing

6:38

that to deepen in. In the

6:41

eroticism that's possible there and this

6:43

is what we have developed and

6:45

discovered in are many decades in

6:47

this field. Raiders: If a body

6:49

is now, if a body part

6:51

is known, what do we do?

6:54

Their If. We want to quote

6:56

unquote, Reclaim it Right In a

6:58

lot of trauma work or survivors

7:01

work or coming back into our

7:03

body is after illness or injury

7:05

or justice connection. Right leg in

7:08

new. We saw this with you

7:10

as a. A mother. Like

7:12

he went teeth into this parenting

7:14

role and last year erotic connection

7:16

with a lot of your body,

7:19

right? Like your breasts were more

7:21

functional than sexual for a long

7:23

time and we had a real

7:25

radha size. your breath. I've

7:28

had to reroute a size

7:30

my body of many times

7:32

over as a trauma survivor

7:34

and so that process of

7:36

Iran says a sham. I'm

7:38

is something I really focus

7:40

on and developed as a

7:42

series of practices things we

7:44

can do on purpose. Repeatedly

7:47

to develop. This

7:50

capacity and experience.

7:52

Incremental change over.

7:55

Time the hats. What's

7:57

Amazing? Hair And so we wanted

7:59

to. The the oral

8:01

eroticism each. And practices

8:04

that we can all. Use

8:06

whether you like love your mouth

8:08

and enjoy your mouth already or

8:10

you feel totally disconnected from your

8:12

mouth and I was just reading

8:14

a common in the oral sex

8:16

course. You know, really

8:18

was. Realizing that this

8:21

person had never considered.

8:24

The. Pleasure they could take. With.

8:27

Their mouth when it comes to

8:29

making love to their husband. but

8:31

we always think about the pleasure

8:33

that the person receiving oral sex

8:35

get know. But we don't often

8:37

think about the pleasure that you

8:39

can really deeply get from giving

8:41

and the pleasure. That we received from

8:43

our mouth is one part of that.

8:45

It's also a full bodied experience. It's

8:47

the relational part of it, but one

8:50

aspect is physically the pleasure we can

8:52

feel in our mouths and what we

8:54

specifically enjoy their and after we take

8:56

a break to thank our sponsor. I

8:58

want to zoom in on

9:01

this piece of identifying and

9:03

enjoying. What we know we already

9:05

like because we all like putting different

9:08

things in our mouths. It turns out

9:10

let's take a moment and thank our

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and at Pleasure Mechanics

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dot com/Toolbox. So. Aurora

10:30

sizing something, making it more

10:32

or Roddick as a verb

10:34

is something we can apply.

10:36

To all parts of our

10:38

body. Two different. Contacts spray

10:41

we can are radha

10:43

size a context I'm

10:45

such as. Your truck re

10:47

every time you pick up your baby.

10:49

Are making out in your trunk

10:52

every time you get in your

10:54

truck you'll have those memory is

10:56

an over time you are rotted

10:58

size that space and that does

11:00

smells even right. We're rada size

11:03

when. We create erotic

11:05

sensations, experience, Contact on

11:07

purpose I'm with. Any

11:09

part of our body or anything. Or

11:12

anywhere I'm him. I have a rod

11:14

a size I have or. iraq size

11:16

different parts of my body, my bras

11:18

cease to be totally numb to sensation

11:21

for like twenty years, and I just

11:23

thought this was a fact about my

11:25

body like my boobs don't have. Much

11:27

sensation and i don't play with

11:30

a much was my own self

11:32

story and through. Specific experiences.

11:35

And then on purpose I woke

11:37

up my breasts on purpose I

11:39

are rotten size them and they

11:41

are now hot spots. Of

11:43

sensation and intimacy and

11:46

experience and even fantasy,

11:48

ah, what a change

11:50

and levels like, not

11:52

something I really expected

11:54

by. Remember how changeable

11:56

our experience of our

11:58

bodies are? And what

12:01

opens up As you were saying

12:03

when we are Radha size parts

12:05

of ourselves on purpose and so

12:08

we really want to invite everyone

12:10

into this practice of our Radha

12:12

sizing her mouth. Remembering

12:15

our mouths is as

12:17

potent zones of sensation,

12:20

stimulation, expression and how

12:22

beautifully specific that is

12:25

for each of. Here

12:29

we communicate in the world so

12:31

much to my mouth like it

12:33

is a way that we bring

12:35

forth so much of what is

12:37

within us. It's the way we

12:39

connect with other people. Three words

12:41

through play, saying forget it isn't

12:44

it Amazing place and when we

12:46

bring more attention and respect and

12:48

honoring an awareness to it, it's

12:50

really kind of or inspiring what

12:52

it does for us and what

12:54

it can create for us. And

12:56

so when we bring back kind.

12:58

Of approach to oral sex

13:00

so much opens up. I'm

13:03

use your mouth in the

13:05

privacy of your own home

13:07

or with your trusted beloved.

13:09

And start paying attention to

13:11

it as an erotic or

13:14

a fifth. Of and

13:16

noticing. What you already enjoy? Yeah, maybe

13:18

you never had a popsicle, but what

13:20

do you eat? And what do you

13:22

put in your mouth that you already

13:24

enjoy? Any experience? pleasure from. And

13:27

there's a gradient of

13:29

pleasure right? like enjoyment

13:31

satisfaction. In feels good enough

13:33

that that range but like starting

13:36

to. Notice. In what we

13:38

do with our mouths and what we

13:40

enjoy is kind of this first stage

13:42

of building an erotic relationship with our

13:44

mouth and starting the a rotten as

13:47

a son process on purpose. And

13:50

when we asked participants of the chorus like

13:52

what do you enjoy putting. In your

13:54

mouth and specifically thinking about mouth.

13:57

Has flavor is one thing and.

14:00

Labor's actually much more about. Smell than

14:02

it is about the mouth

14:04

and the tongue and the

14:06

nerve endings of the mouth

14:09

of sell them out itself

14:11

experiences, mouth feel, the textures,

14:13

the sensations, other food and

14:16

so many responses. Were so.

14:18

Specific and about

14:20

the experience. In our

14:22

mouth. Right like the yielding

14:25

of a crispy skin into

14:27

a succulents center or the

14:30

specific crispin s between our

14:32

teeth. And we

14:35

can start paying attention to these

14:37

pleasures and then mapping them into

14:39

our Roddick lie. I had a

14:42

lover recently talked to me. About

14:44

how much when they are

14:46

biting. They love the sensation

14:48

of the fleshy yielding between

14:50

their teeth. and it was

14:52

so cool to start thinking

14:54

about the sensations in art.

14:56

He's like. What are your

14:58

teeth themselves experience? With what?

15:01

Is the feeling on your

15:03

tongue as you stimulate your

15:05

lover in different ways? And

15:07

when we zoom in on

15:09

that, What. Are the pleasures they

15:11

are that you are ready. Enjoy! And

15:13

then as we explore this right as

15:16

we are, Rada size our mouths as

15:18

we look at what we already enjoy

15:20

as we start waking. Up our

15:22

mouths on purpose and in the

15:25

oral course we have a whole

15:27

set of self oral eroticism, Action

15:29

Practices Seeking a really deep in

15:32

this is Charlotte has and has

15:34

totally changed her experience of her

15:37

mouth. It's been deeply pleasurable. A

15:39

ferry from Live and ah,

15:41

We also had to account

15:43

for the. things you don't like to

15:46

do with your mouth and the textures you

15:48

don't enjoy. Answer. That to be okay.

15:50

And for that to be. Okay, but to get

15:52

more clarity around what those are on

15:54

both ends of, yeah fact, Roman, that's

15:56

what. so cool about the erotic as

15:59

it makes me. For what you

16:01

love, what you enjoy way are curious.

16:03

About and were you're no

16:05

thank you. Not for me

16:08

right now. Experiences are and.

16:10

We all have specific things. Here,

16:12

some people really like body hair

16:14

and the sensation. Of hair on

16:17

their tongue. For other people, this

16:19

specific sensation of hair on the

16:21

tongue is very a key. and

16:23

knowing your ex and you're young

16:26

is so important in. In feeding

16:28

yourself right with food. And

16:30

with sex and we really want

16:32

to support all of us and

16:34

getting. More. Specific with our

16:37

or Roddick experience.

16:39

Of our mouth and take

16:41

them so. Exquisitely. Seriously, as

16:43

an erotic zone, I'm the more

16:46

you wake them up, the more

16:48

awake they are in, the more

16:50

they experience the world and it

16:52

can be a delight. To

16:55

give yourself more permission to

16:57

enjoy food, To enjoy the

16:59

sensations. Our. Mouths give us. To

17:03

choose your favorite coffee cup for the

17:05

specific way it hits your of lip.

17:08

Ah hum! There's so many ways

17:10

in our daily lives we can

17:12

enjoy our mouth is more and

17:15

then for me there's this. Byproduct

17:18

of all of this were as

17:20

we get. In more erotic relationship

17:22

with our mouths. and yes, we

17:24

can enjoy way hotter world. Saxon

17:26

give our lover lots more pleasure

17:28

when were enthusiastic and burritos. With. Are

17:31

hungry Our mouth because they're so awake?

17:33

because or so away I can know

17:35

what they're hungry for and know how

17:37

to get what they want. We

17:40

also can start speaking are

17:43

truth is more clearly and

17:45

showing up in expressing ourselves

17:47

and using our mouths to

17:49

express our passions. Raid

17:52

and when we can com at our lover

17:54

and use our. Mouth to clearly

17:56

and confidently. Express our

17:59

passions, Feelings are emotions

18:01

can pour through our

18:03

mouths into their flesh.

18:05

That is. An exquisite experience

18:08

that I want us all

18:10

to wake up into, using

18:12

our mouths as expressive a

18:14

motive part of our love

18:17

me again. What would

18:19

that look like for you? And

18:21

that both sounds and breath

18:23

but also how we use

18:25

our mouths to stimulate and.

18:28

Move. Into one another. Riot

18:30

like com oral sex can

18:32

be so. Explicitly intimate

18:34

and emotional, precisely

18:36

because our mouths

18:39

are exquisite, instruments

18:41

are self expression.

18:43

So. Why not Deep in our relationship

18:45

with them? Ah, so

18:48

we hope this whole podcast

18:50

episode has been an invitation

18:52

into. Getting in erotic

18:54

relationship with your mouth and not

18:56

begins by paying attention to what

18:58

we already are experiencing and enjoying

19:01

in our mouths. And

19:03

then from there thera practices we can

19:05

do to deep in in our rustic

19:07

relationship with our. Mouth this process

19:10

of eroticism takes place

19:12

over time, it is

19:14

incremental. Have hidden

19:16

hi we're taking a walk today talking

19:18

about you know how amazing it is?

19:20

Have orgasms from giving oral. Sex and

19:22

hello wake our mouth can be

19:25

in the pleasures. Can be so

19:27

arousing. We com just from giving and

19:29

she was like wow that's a short

19:31

path. For you but not

19:33

for everyone and I stopped

19:36

dead in my traffic suitable

19:38

laughed at or because my

19:40

short path has than thirty

19:42

plus years of doing this

19:44

full time read or Radha

19:46

sizing my a very disconnected,

19:48

very traumatized, very ill body

19:50

is I said realize that

19:53

correctly I felt immediately upon

19:55

saying that are like wearing

19:57

us history separately Million for

19:59

inter. This is not something we

20:01

all have access. To right away most

20:03

of us do not have orgasms

20:06

from giving oral. Sex because we

20:08

have not been an erotic relationship

20:10

with our own mouths and that

20:13

is okay, but that's like any

20:15

in relationship. Matters because we start

20:17

the relations and we retired from

20:19

wherever where are exact. again and

20:22

again and again, right? And that's

20:24

also part of the path is

20:26

wherever you're at. Right now is

20:28

where we started and what are

20:30

you enjoying right now? So as

20:32

you leave this episode over the

20:34

next few hours. I invite you

20:37

to pay attention to your

20:39

mouth with a little bit

20:41

more precision and node is

20:43

what you're already enjoying and

20:46

maybe even do something you

20:48

like on purpose. Notice.

20:51

The sensations notice the

20:53

experience. Say hello to your

20:55

mouth as a sexual or assess

20:58

and see how it feels. For

21:00

your own pleasure, right? Not for somebody else

21:02

Is pleasure, not forgiving pleasure to someone else,

21:04

which is often how we relate to her

21:06

mouth. But for your own pleasure and up.

21:09

And. See how it feels? See what

21:11

that experiences like? If you

21:13

want to take a deep dive

21:16

with us into the potential of

21:18

oral pleasure, we have a brand

21:21

new course available for you at

21:23

Pleasure mechanics.com/oral And if you are

21:25

listening to this podcast right now

21:28

and May twenty twenty four we

21:30

are in rolling. Our. Group coaching

21:32

cohort for the oral core.

21:35

Where you can get

21:37

our personalize support and

21:39

join us on my

21:41

community calls and gatherings

21:43

to master the art

21:45

of oral eroticism Together.

21:48

We're going to be focusing. On this

21:50

for the next many months.

21:52

the cohort is now open

21:55

and enrolling at Pleasure mechanics.com/oral

21:57

You will find all the

21:59

are. For the court. Their this

22:01

is another Pleasure Mechanics online

22:04

course brought to you with

22:06

love by of we are

22:09

too independent sex educators dedicated

22:11

full time. To doing this work

22:13

for. Our beloved. Global.

22:16

Audience of erotic explorers

22:18

that you. That's the

22:20

sixteen thousand people. Already

22:22

trusting our online courses

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to go deeper with us, you'll

22:31

find it all our pleasure mechanics.com.

22:34

And. Through the links and the show know. We

22:37

love you. We will be back with

22:39

you next week with another episode of

22:42

Speaking of Sex with a Pleasure Mechanics

22:44

Go A rather says you're now let

22:46

us know how it feels. I'm Chris,

22:49

I'm Charlotte and the pleasure mechanic wishing.

22:51

You a lifetime of

22:53

pleasure! Cheers!