My Journey through a spiritually abusive church to a healthy spiritual understanding of who I am, where I came from, and where I am going. God was always waiting to catch me messing up so he could smite me into an eternal hell. Jesus was loving, kind, and sacrificial. They were the ultimate cosmic good cop / bad cop duo with a silent mysterious partner called the Holy Ghost that we really didn't know anything about.I got pretty hung up on the eternal damnation part and was never able to grow past that mindset.