In this episode I will be talking about what I consider the first of the promises from the first edition of the book, Alcoholics Anonymous. The promises start on page 83. Once again, I consider the following to be the first of the 12 promises:

Promise 1: I will be amazed before I am halfway through.

As I have said, I am not absolutely sure to what the term, before I am halfway through, refers. I think it is possible that it refers to step nine where I have made amends to such people wherever possible, but I do not feel confident that this is what it refers to. I feel more confident that it refers to the 12 steps in general but not necessarily a literal interpretation, meaning the end of step number six. I think it means that generally speaking, I will realize, if I have been painstakingly applying the 12 steps to my life, I will undergo a radical change in the way I look at life in general, and my spiritual connection to it in particular.

For me, the most radical change came at the end of the first three steps — and definitely after step three. I consider step three to be my absolute, on ambiguous, commitment to try to live my life as God would have me do it. Again, for me, this was my defining moment of surrender. It was my admission that I had not been able to manage my life up to that point and that I was ready and willing to give up the insanity of thinking I could keep running my life in the same manner, and get a different result. In short, I was ready to confine my actions as directed by God, but at the same time, I felt as though I had more freedom than ever before. Yes, I was truly amazed.