One of the things that most bothers me when I mentor or coach people, is when they say: 'I'm not confident - never have been, never will be.' It's like they think there's a 'gene' for confidence - which they don't have. It bothers me because if you don't believe confidence is possible, you give up. Or you try too hard. You either become invisible, or show up everywhere 'performing' your confidence to anyone who'll watch. Neither strategy works.