0:02

Hello, and welcome to a very

0:04

special episode of the Adam Friedland

0:06

Show podcast. As we've

0:08

alluded to in the last couple of weeks, we

0:11

are in dire financial straits these days.

0:14

We're trying to save the business. We are

0:16

being threatened by potentially

0:19

filing for Chapter 7 or 11 bankruptcy. So

0:24

what many of you don't know is that those of

0:26

you who don't subscribe to our page... Hello,

0:32

welcome to the Adam Friedland Show podcast.

0:34

Very special episode. Before

0:37

we start, I just want to introduce you guys. A lot

0:40

of people, the

0:42

show has hit kind of like in any

0:44

long relationship. You're like with a girl. Sometimes

0:47

you don't fuck for a couple of months. And

0:49

Nick and I are kind of in that kind of stage

0:51

right now. I think it's become apparent to

0:53

the fans. And they want to get us

0:55

fucking again. They want to spice up our

0:57

relationship a little bit. And a lot of

0:59

you have been asking for an official Adam

1:01

Friedland Show podcast mascot. And

1:04

so I came back from

1:06

the weekend. I was in Detroit last weekend. Thank

1:08

you to everyone who came to the shows in

1:10

Detroit and Boston. They were incredible shows. And

1:14

I came back. The studio was spotless. He cleaned

1:17

for me. Which

1:20

made me feel good. And

1:22

also I saw this gentleman over

1:24

here. And Nick brought into our

1:26

lives the new official Adam Friedland

1:28

Show mascot. This is Mr. Hashimoto.

1:31

He was once a file cabinet. And now he

1:34

is kind of a Japanese

1:36

salary man. Kind of a

1:38

bukkakey style. You

1:41

know the deal. Also

1:43

guys, on the Patreon side, I just wanted to

1:45

mention for those of you

1:47

who subscribe to the Patreon, this

1:50

Monday or Tuesday you saw our

1:52

first installment of the Adam Friedland

1:54

Show Digital Short Series, which will

1:56

now be a weekly occurrence. Nick

1:58

and I. We'll

2:00

be making one digital shorts

2:03

style sketch a week on

2:05

patreon for our intrepid Patreon subscribers also

2:07

we released a lot of other exclusive

2:09

content this week the shooting script for

2:12

the last episode of the Paul Schrader

2:15

episode of the talk show and also We

2:18

are we're gonna figure out how to do

2:21

for our patreon subscribers if you don't subscribe

2:24

These were some props that Nick

2:26

made For the last sketch

2:28

that didn't actually end up making it into

2:30

the episode, but we kind of we

2:33

wanted Figure out a

2:35

way for our subscribers on patreon to have a

2:37

contest or something about it We don't know how

2:39

to do it specifically, but we're going to be

2:41

doing it in the next couple weeks for

2:44

these exclusive Nick ordered these PS5

2:47

cases I'll get to you I'll get

2:49

to you in a second PS5 cases

2:51

and he got a photo printer and

2:53

then and then photoshopped these PlayStation

2:57

games for

2:59

instance Master of the

3:02

Senate Lyndon Johnson the Robert Caro.

3:04

This is a ps5 game This

3:07

is the last bit of pussy part 2 of

3:10

course the Capcom boys don't cry

3:13

And who could forget game Madden 24, which

3:15

I hear is quite good. Oh the holy

3:17

Quran So guys

3:20

if you don't subscribe to patreon and you want

3:22

to enter the contest and you

3:25

will see the new digital short series

3:27

of course the weekly podcast and Enter

3:31

a chance for you to win one

3:33

of these exclusive ps5 games

3:36

Developed by Nick Mullen for our last sketch that didn't make

3:38

it in because it was a nightmare of a scenario And

3:41

I'm glad it's behind us Finally

3:43

because money is getting tight

3:46

We did also have a fuck of fan

3:48

challenge And I'd like to introduce you guys

3:50

to the winner of the fuck a fan

3:52

challenge you want to introduce yourself your name

3:55

Hey out there in TV land. My name is Riley Adam

3:58

let me fuck him and he fucked I wouldn't say

4:01

let you, it was kind of I had to.

4:03

He had to let me fuck him. It

4:05

was me fucking Adam. Just kidding, that was kind of

4:08

a nasty joke. Riley and I

4:10

are good friends with my friend Riley Walker.

4:12

We're pals. He is a Grammy award winning

4:14

musician. You've worked with him. Never even been

4:16

in the consideration of the conversation for Grammy.

4:18

You worked with everyone from Robert Plant

4:22

to John Bonham

4:24

to... Yeah,

4:27

Bonzo. Me and Bonzo used to hit it hard back in

4:29

the late 70s. Mr. P. Moon, of course. Brian

4:33

Eno, Brian Pinero. You

4:35

know, he worked with all of them. He's

4:38

a very talented musician. Probably I

4:40

would venture to say musical genius.

4:42

He never would. Yeah,

4:45

so everyone give it up for Riley Walker.

4:47

Mr. Guaranteed 11 inches. Riley

4:49

Walker. Welcome to the show,

4:51

pal. Nick's on the road. We

4:55

will, I think we should check

4:57

back in with Nick later on in the

4:59

episode. Yeah, let's give Nick a shout out.

5:01

I'm doing you no favors by being on

5:03

here. I'm nobody at all, so I really appreciate

5:05

it. Well, I mean, in the music community,

5:07

I think you're quite heralded and well respected,

5:09

but definitely in

5:11

the podcast fan

5:13

audience, I think you might

5:15

receive death threats. Yeah, I'm going to be transferring at

5:18

Union Station and get a knife in my side. I'm

5:20

not really looking forward to it because I'm not Nick

5:22

and I'm not a comedy guy. By virtue of the

5:24

fact that you're not Nick, I put actually your life

5:26

in danger. Yeah, I'm going to die. It's totally worth

5:29

it. Which is kind of how Jews

5:31

all around the country are feeling right now. So

5:34

maybe walk a mile in our shoes.

5:36

Yeah, I'm finally there. With a rise

5:38

in anti-Semitism. Riley is

5:40

a buddy of mine, very

5:42

funny dude, musician

5:44

and also he's been a

5:47

OG fan of Come Town. Yeah,

5:49

you guys were big on the stereo back in

5:52

the day in the tour van and stuff. You

5:54

listened on the stereo. And a stereo on a

5:56

boombox. Yeah. I Remember, I don't know

5:58

if it's... I.

6:00

Get I think I as you vs

6:02

before but ah and Riley Rally were

6:04

liked to party a little bit too

6:06

much from here to go away to

6:08

I'd to a place that teaches you

6:11

not to party anymore at a clinic.

6:13

and I are friends would I. Explain

6:16

com sounders that he was missing because of

6:18

a your incarcerate yeah on in handwritten letter

6:20

form he was getting use getting. I'd Come

6:22

Town is written in by hand by our

6:24

friends. From the I was it was contraband.

6:27

They got into rehab and I read it

6:29

and laugh and it got me one day.

6:31

Closer to the and serenity and I'm here

6:33

now It's even Israel Join so we I

6:36

essentially guy you know this, you got me

6:38

clean. Lego to Adam Yeah I owe to

6:40

Adam because of Green. Five years. Five years

6:42

Now five years clean was given up for

6:45

Riley is a very monuments. Used to be

6:47

one of the most phone guys now use

6:49

in I searched nice Us: yeah size Me:

6:51

ah I'm. Yeah. Congratulations you for his

6:53

arm yeah cause of as a bribe to get

6:56

in with like his ass or something snows melt

6:58

and letter form but you know they they were

7:00

that read the letters and their be like a

7:02

home for doing well the other be like some

7:05

sort of communication there's and it when repass the

7:07

first paragraph of like a prison letter in the

7:09

rest was is funny stuff a you were saying

7:11

that the time and of israel or auditor wasn't

7:13

anything i was as am sure is more in

7:16

early funny game where where they sam and they

7:18

said adam and then same thrilling atoms you're gay

7:20

see a lot of con you gay. And

7:22

you last were while you're in. A

7:25

Drugs Drugs for Drug withdrawal Yeah is

7:27

wrong Absolutely. While nurseries by my side

7:30

holding my hand he really fear. Is.

7:33

It does is like that the I could

7:35

try and having nightmares of isn't sit in

7:37

the bad in on I thought those more

7:39

a sexual and wheezing nurse I think pour

7:41

know I wasn't getting jerked off or nothing

7:43

was a total clinical thing. Yeah losing my

7:45

dick work at the time. You're.

7:48

dig didn't work at my mother was

7:50

dying of yeah well congratulations for you

7:52

as your decision rather be her body

7:54

thanks a lot i like been alive

7:56

ah here as i am very proud

7:58

am a fan of of

8:00

Riley. He's one of the best guys

8:03

I know pretty much. Oh, thanks. And

8:05

that's why we call him Mr. Guaranteed

8:07

11 inches, of course. Yeah, thank you

8:09

very much guys. And that's a guarantee

8:12

to every guy watching. Who canceled on this

8:14

to make me come on the podcast? Nick

8:16

had to go on the road. Oh, Nick

8:18

had to go on the road. He thought

8:20

of your coolest, most famous friend, me. I

8:22

thought of my friend that needs this. Yeah,

8:24

I need this pretty bad actually. My career's

8:26

in a real downturn. I made up a

8:28

fuck a fan challenge, right? And I

8:30

sent it to you in an email and

8:32

it seemed like there were other people... You

8:35

couldn't get Souffion Stevens? No, no, no. Couldn't get Souffion?

8:37

Brother, I made up a fan. You don't have the

8:40

poll for Souffion? I made up a fan. This guy

8:42

sucks. First of all, Souffion

8:44

Stevens, I don't think you like this

8:46

very much. He would love it. You

8:48

think so? Yeah, close personal friend. What's

8:50

his vibe like? I've actually never met

8:52

Souffion Stevens. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah. But

8:54

I assume he'd write a whole concept

8:56

album about it. Yeah, yeah. So, Riley...

8:59

One thing I was thinking today

9:01

is, Riley has a lot of

9:04

contacts in the music industry. You've been a

9:06

veteran of... Indierock. Indierock. Yeah, the indierock business,

9:08

I know everybody pretty much except Souffion. Yeah.

9:10

So, you have a lot of... I'm sure

9:13

in your address

9:15

book or whatever it is on the iPhone, you have

9:17

a lot of names in there. A ton of big

9:19

names, yeah. Yeah, like Mr. Dave

9:22

Matthews, for instance. Dave, yeah. Yeah,

9:24

David. Do you think we...

9:26

Should we call him right now? Maybe he's on

9:29

Safari right now. He likes to go to the

9:31

motherland a whole lot. Oh, yeah. I'm in South

9:33

African as well. Yeah, you guys are South African

9:35

brothers. Yeah, yeah. Well, not biologically. But you think

9:37

he's in the... He wouldn't like

9:39

to be called right now. I don't know. Just call

9:42

him right now, okay? I

9:45

think you're yourself to death. Yeah, he drank himself stupid

9:47

and then he died. I feel like no one's drank

9:49

themselves to death since Hendrix. Hendrix

9:52

drowned in a bathtub with a bottle of wine.

9:55

He joked on his own vomit. And

9:57

his penis was huge apparently. Yeah, that's

9:59

why I've heard as well. Yeah. Left handed

10:01

Penis Left Handed Penis Yeah, he hit a

10:03

left handed females. Are

10:06

you taxi Dave Matthews? First Know? Really?

10:08

I mean Riley. I thought I wanted

10:10

I thought you would love it! I

10:13

can you doing this to get closer. Dave Matthews

10:15

on here for wrong reasons. Listen.

10:17

Brother I'm not Yeah, maybe I am using

10:19

you take same as is insensitive met Would

10:22

you say whatever you be able for Call.

10:24

Release is so Riley actually wouldn't a

10:27

Dave Matthews Band growing up and he

10:29

recorded covers. album said everybody Hasan I

10:31

lost the record label I was on

10:34

a ton of money. The Excuses: For

10:37

everyone has a x ever who suffered

10:40

a massive Daves actually had a members

10:42

of activists say we have you got

10:44

shot Saturday matter Your guy was on

10:46

record label tens of thousands of dollars

10:49

still recovering from that Oh yeah yeah

10:51

so you're jail for music industry right

10:53

rally on Independence Day. Your Independent

10:55

I'm totally independent. Riley like and been

10:57

telling me for years is like I'm

10:59

done with a rocker dream. yet regime

11:01

is done. Podcast is have all the

11:03

money now. He took all the same

11:05

cc siphoned from us. We are kind

11:07

of the new. the year that Iraq

11:09

sizes painful, really nice. really suffer you

11:12

that jam and life is pretty fucking

11:14

shit. Who has really bad actually? I

11:16

guess I'm hundred. I do like Not

11:18

okay. I

11:20

was severed their avast ever. You

11:22

know you're fine who and live

11:24

for today. As you're Happy So we

11:26

break the. Game or Dubnyk for.

11:29

The. Omega recall. He's. A bad

11:32

mood when it was a prank below. Is

11:35

it were easy? Easy Easy doesn't

11:37

want to be on The Road Runner is

11:39

on the road and comedy. He's doing comedy

11:42

in. Israel. Would.

11:44

Allow service. Hey

11:51

dude, we got a big problem. i

11:55

came in the syria mr hashimoto is

11:57

covered in blood and com What?

12:02

Mr. Hashimoto is covered in blood and cum.

12:06

So? I...

12:11

You're pranked. What

12:15

do you mean? There are other

12:17

guys here, they're laughing their asses off right now.

12:19

I fucking pranked your ass. You

12:23

really thought that a file cabinet

12:25

could get brutally sexually assaulted. Well,

12:27

why couldn't it? I

12:30

don't know, because it doesn't have a pussy, dude. It's made out of

12:32

metal. I've

12:34

fucked metal things before. Oh yeah, Riley's

12:36

here, he says hi. Hey

12:39

Riley. I don't think you understand how

12:41

cum works. I

12:43

think I understand how cum works, brother. It

12:45

doesn't... It can go on anything. It doesn't

12:47

have to go on... It

12:50

doesn't have to be like a person. You

12:52

know what I mean? Oh

12:55

yeah, I know what you're saying. Like on the floor or

12:57

in the toilet. Oh,

13:01

Nick, guess what? You're double pranked. We're on

13:03

the fucking show right now. Oh

13:07

no. Yeah. Oh no.

13:10

You want to... You must feel like

13:12

a real fucking idiot right now. So

13:16

I understand, do we still have the file cabinet character or

13:18

no? The file cabinet character, yeah,

13:21

we still have it. Okay,

13:23

well if I'm on the show, I guess I'd

13:25

better get into the show mode. What is up?

13:27

Good afternoon. Welcome to the Adam Freeland show. Welcome

13:29

to the Adam Freeland show. Hey Nick, thanks for

13:32

letting me be on. I really appreciate it. I

13:34

need this more than you need me. Hey Nick,

13:36

could you not? Sorry. Yeah, you

13:38

interrupted him. Sorry. Could you not?

13:41

Yeah. Please? Good

13:43

afternoon, Nick. Go ahead. One

13:46

more... Three, two, one. Wow.

13:50

Nick? Wow. I

13:52

was counting you down. Wow.

13:55

Just do your good afternoon, brother. Come on.

13:58

Oh no, I feel patronized. I'm

14:00

not patronizing. Okay, so Good

14:03

afternoon. Welcome to the Adam Freeland show live via satellite.

14:05

We got Nick Mullen and we are joined by Riley

14:07

Walker multigrammy platinum

14:09

award-winning the writer of

14:13

Umbrella by Rihanna actually. Yeah, you know that

14:15

you did that Yeah,

14:18

it was my idea to do the Ella

14:20

Ella Ella part. Yeah, I put my kids

14:22

through college with that Well,

14:25

it's actually about a risky gay

14:27

sex act But

14:30

it's yeah comes from first-hand experience. It's called

14:32

the umbrella. Yeah Yeah,

14:36

I think so yeah, it's about going to Grand Central

14:38

and blowing people anonymously

14:42

You guys are such master prank artists, I

14:45

can't tell what I'm being pranked and when

14:47

yeah I think that is a

14:49

good lesson about pranking is like if you prank

14:51

too much then like you kind of You

14:54

kind of will alienate Black

14:56

people use umbrellas. I think they

14:58

do in like New Orleans style

15:00

like funeral marches and stuff Yeah,

15:06

yeah, there's a jazz aspect to it it

15:08

is kind of like it's kind of the

15:10

silent jazz instrument Would you say that as

15:13

a musician Riley a trombone is the silent?

15:15

No, no the umbrella Yeah, the

15:17

umbrella has a big part in jazz history for

15:19

sure. Yeah documented. Yeah, and so right

15:27

Yeah, yeah, actually the guitars on stage

15:29

right now it's a really small-bodied guitar

15:32

kind of for I'd

15:34

say like tweens. Yeah, it's a it's

15:36

a if anyone doesn't know Sam

15:38

Ash is going out of business in Midtown, Manhattan

15:40

I Was

15:54

literally staring at a sousaphone for like 20

15:56

minutes he's like dude we got together for

15:58

the studio in this experience. You

16:01

can lay it down. Yeah.

16:03

Yeah. It's like for girls that are like

16:11

want to learn Lana Del

16:13

Rey. Prevalent, yeah. They do really

16:15

well. They do like... I

16:30

mean, I think you're a senior citizen that's

16:32

like playing a ukulele wondering if

16:34

it's still cute. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

16:36

You know what I mean? Yeah. Is that weird that that's the

16:38

type of person you can be now? Yeah,

16:41

she's like... Is menopausal ukulele

16:43

playing? Yeah, kind of like

16:45

a like a fat zooey

16:47

D. Chanel style. Not

16:49

even fat dude. Not even. Oh.

16:52

Just, just,

16:55

in fact, on paper still incredibly hot.

16:57

I mean, I would... any girl is

16:59

beautiful to me. Yeah,

17:02

but too old. Too old. Sorry.

17:04

Yeah, yeah. Too old. I'm sorry.

17:06

What am I gonna do with a 35 year old?

17:09

Your aims are probably covered in

17:12

cobwebs by now. He's

17:16

like the ad of his family house. Oh,

17:19

Nick, I think I gotta stop you

17:21

right there. I

17:24

just want to tell our audience... I

17:26

think I might have poisoned myself. I just

17:28

had something called Carolina Kettle Cook Coastal

17:31

Crab Boil Potato Chips with

17:33

a can of Mountain Dew and I don't think

17:35

these two are supposed to combine. Really?

17:38

Oh yeah, you are in... you're in

17:40

Raleigh, North Carolina right now. I'm in

17:42

Raleigh, North Carolina. I would invite you

17:45

guys, you know, to the

17:47

show, but unfortunately they are sold

17:49

out completely. Are they? No,

17:52

not even close. Yeah,

17:55

no, I'm looking at... I got the

17:57

tickets counts. This might be... A

18:03

solidarity. I know that feeling very well

18:05

with the small his audience. You perform

18:08

for just a sound guy. Just the

18:10

saga see Riley's Riley's from a D

18:12

I y ya implied seat so we

18:14

feel like failures. Riley's like this is

18:17

actually makes me I'm a better artists

18:19

because I don't I see as his

18:21

i saw him devices as I can

18:24

manifest money on prefers races as we

18:26

are real would ask. Them

18:35

for our. it's not like. We're

18:41

movies. Or

18:49

was. Destroyed

18:52

or. Scope.

19:06

The Faq: I move it. Says

19:08

he like oh boy do I go

19:10

watch. Go

19:12

back A. Year. Ago.

19:29

As. Situation.

19:33

And we're which is where my rude from

19:35

the guys about babbel. Giant in whore.

19:38

What's the best way to learn a language

19:40

immersion living where the languages spoken in using

19:42

an everyday. But if that's not in the

19:44

cards, you can still learn language the second

19:46

best way. And that's with Babbel. One in

19:48

five Americans have learned a new language on

19:50

their bucket list. Is that you

19:53

make twenty Twenty four? Ah,

19:55

The year you finally take it off the

19:57

list with Babbel. You. Know actually

19:59

rally. I will. Learn Arabic so I can

20:01

learn I've the term i'm sorry superior

20:03

Thank you. So will I need to

20:06

learn sorry or salaam. Ah,

20:09

Imaginative Language

20:11

spoke. The

20:17

Language School. Like.

20:20

Like. Yeah,

20:23

hours. Per.

20:26

Night everybody was gonna go around.

20:32

You yell. Who.

20:34

And who's who's Nasa tower? Was

20:36

it Muhammad Auto? Show.

20:42

Very cool us for you I on the

20:44

plane on a wager. Yeah.

20:47

And like I was a fake to

20:50

reside do I was a couple of

20:52

days I keep your family needs to

20:54

die like a six year old Indian

20:57

than with his shoes and socks completely

20:59

off. I'm just trying to just cruise

21:01

into the cockpit looking for the bathroom

21:04

and guys will I love guys I

21:06

was like oh no that's no Uk

21:08

going there that saker cry and appointed

21:11

advantages to the way guys are gadgets

21:13

make themselves. I come from the comfortable

21:15

with. Shoes off and

21:18

dogs doodle as Iga

21:20

Wow associated. With.

21:24

I showed him for said on the shop. But

21:28

tonight he i just i got

21:30

kind of thing about how effect

21:32

is is it sake you know

21:34

ah ah gotcha geyser and yeah

21:36

magazine saga obsolete passwords me anything

21:38

to enforce it already has given

21:40

up on make it part of

21:42

like i'm making jokes right and

21:44

as a side you know they

21:46

go to tackle. The.

21:48

Experiment going easy easy New is

21:50

not Muslim. Muslims from your average

21:53

are making the jokes. Like jokes

21:55

like that thing, terrorist stuff. On.

21:57

my phone with my friend you know I'm

22:00

like, oh, well, I hope the people behind

22:02

me can't see my phone, you

22:04

know, because then I also in that conversation I

22:06

can get you to sketch where it's like it's

22:08

9-11, right? And Like

22:11

the hijackers have already taken over the

22:13

plane, you know Yeah,

22:15

the hijackers are taken over the plane and then some

22:17

guy stands up. He's like He's

22:20

like this is bullshit. This is our lives

22:22

and we're gonna sit here and be cowards

22:24

and then people are like, yeah Yeah,

22:26

this guy's right and he's like whipping them up into

22:28

a frenzy He's like we have to

22:31

do like we're gonna take things into our own hands Everyone's

22:44

like this guy's a homophobe He's

22:49

a big it So

22:53

what the moral of the story is

22:55

that is that is that the everyone

22:57

dies because they didn't Because

22:59

because they didn't want to help a

23:01

big it Yeah,

23:05

that's pretty good, what do you think about that?

23:07

I Think

23:09

it's great that people are standing up to hate. Yeah.

23:11

Yeah, I agree in this get I

23:16

didn't know sell it dude. I was like dude. I

23:18

was I

23:23

get it the premise is that it's complicated

23:25

life is complicated, you know Sometimes

23:27

you think you're standing up to bigotry and then

23:30

you die in 9-11 you and then the towers

23:32

crumble I

23:37

was laughing You

23:40

can't see it because you're on speaker from Fast

23:43

forward to the end of 2024 think of your goals What

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can you do right now to give yourself

23:47

the best chance of succeeding if you want

23:49

to learn the new language? You absolutely should

23:52

get babble. Do you know any other languages

23:54

Riley? No, no Did

23:56

you know learning actually makes a sound

23:58

it's true and then there's sound effect

24:00

for Babble which we're gonna impose.

24:02

Start the ad read over. Is Pete switching?

24:05

Pete? Yeah,

24:07

Pete's pushing. Let's now clean break,

24:10

start the ad read now.

24:12

Now, okay. We'll erase, let's

24:15

leave it in because I want my

24:17

sketch idea. No, it's good. It's worth

24:19

leaving in. But I don't

24:21

want to deal with them whining. With them,

24:24

about the 9-11 and then this blur.

24:26

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll say ad read and then I'll

24:28

finish it off. We got in trouble with another sponsor.

24:30

Sure, sure. We're gonna maybe talk about later on in

24:33

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26:02

right, we're back, Nick. Are

26:05

you there? Yeah. We're

26:08

back with Riley Walker. They always appears in

26:10

town. They got a

26:12

John Madden bus, and I'm trying to get

26:14

on that bus. Oh,

26:17

okay. Yeah, you should get on. Riley's

26:20

a big fan of Ari, actually. I'll

26:22

let Ari know if I can get him. Boy, he's

26:24

been like... I'm like, where are you at? He's

26:28

like, we just finished at Walmart. I'm like,

26:30

I'm not going to call a Lyft at

26:32

your bus. Yeah, well, where

26:34

is the bus? Just

26:37

fucking come pick me up in the goddamn bus.

26:39

Yeah, it moves. They have a bus? They

26:42

got a John Madden bus, yeah. What do

26:44

you mean a John Madden bus? Like an

26:46

RV. Oh, okay. For what? For just... Just

26:49

to drive around. Yeah, driving

26:51

around, doing bits, podcasting...

26:54

Oh. Psychedelic

26:57

mushrooms. Oh. Yeah.

27:00

Okay. Girls. Wow.

27:03

Mad girls. Uh-huh. Guys.

27:06

Yeah. Yeah. Comedians can just

27:08

afford to do that shit. That's insane. Sorry.

27:10

How are you all so rich? It's fucking...

27:12

It fucking blows my mind. Anyways, okay. Sorry,

27:15

dude. Just... Like,

27:17

we've got some distance from the ad-reads. Okay.

27:21

So, anyway, I'm pitching this sketch

27:23

idea, you know, about this guy

27:25

that keeps, like, digging a

27:27

fever. He's like, dude, what's

27:29

a fucking sandboob hobo? You

27:31

know. And he thinks that they're also

27:33

gay. Yeah, okay. Yeah, right.

27:35

Yeah. I was texting and

27:38

stuff on, you know, and I'm like, oh, man, I

27:40

hope the people behind me can't see what I'm texting.

27:43

Yeah, because you're saying a lot of... a lot of risquets

27:45

stuff. Right, yeah, but imagine

27:47

you're on a plane and you see someone

27:49

saying, like, terrorism and bomb and hijack and

27:52

you get worried. And flirt. Yeah.

27:54

Hold on. You see terrorism

27:56

and bombing and hijacking and you get worried.

28:00

The Vienna Word and the have sworn

28:02

you're like oh thank God or patriot.

28:07

Act like oh my God Thank

28:09

God I is. Why do. A

28:12

guy was in an email and

28:14

discover that amount of know you

28:16

could say god that you do

28:18

you know more, become that Riley's

28:20

how you make a big boss.

28:23

Zoc. That's how we like remove the

28:25

nineties. divorce is gonna happen is is

28:27

gonna get it or passive aggressive to

28:29

sit with this flight attendant that putting

28:32

his seat belt on. Yeah. Yea.

28:35

So but yeah and think they're

28:37

like of the. Coven

28:40

still happening and they wanna give him

28:42

a vaccine. Was. Orange

28:44

Way when down and Shanksville. The guy

28:46

said let's roll of we have my

28:48

throne Pimp Yeah birds Rosalia be as

28:50

an as early as amazing to write

28:52

like. I

28:54

went to get up in a letter word daughters

28:57

and. About like racism

28:59

is good you know because I I know

29:01

I can see I know what guys I

29:03

can I get those are was from the

29:05

seats are now it's person but it's like

29:07

it's in or so psychosis and next it

29:09

like an old ladies right and she sakes

29:11

you know nervous because you see to see.

29:13

A guy heading towards the cockpit and

29:16

then you explain their or you're like

29:18

oh actually you see that bracelet that

29:20

means that was on he's actually eat

29:22

or injuries Seguin V P have actually

29:24

been at war with zhi the him

29:26

for a very long as I just

29:28

the number one guy you boy in

29:30

the cockpit gifts muslims were to attack

29:32

and oh my god thank you and

29:34

then I see that the and you

29:37

guys actually go on to the bathroom

29:39

and on like. A.

29:53

Who's. who

30:10

That was pretty good

30:12

dude. Yeah. That was pretty good.

30:15

I'm glad you had the space away from

30:17

the read to get that out there. Mm-hmm.

30:21

Wait, so those guys are partying on a bus, they're not going

30:23

to lay you on? I

30:27

just said, okay, we'll be at the improv in

30:29

an hour. It's only 15 minutes from you. So

30:32

go meet them. And I

30:35

don't know if that means we'll pick you up

30:37

in the bus or again, like I'm not calling...

30:39

Meet you means meet you

30:42

at the improv. Dude, if your fucking

30:44

hotel has wheels on it, like,

30:48

what is the point? Okay, we got the

30:50

bus and now it's parked. It's

30:53

a good opportunity to join an e-bike program.

30:56

Yeah, yeah. Why don't you take one of

30:58

those little lime scooters? Why

31:00

don't they just pick me up in the John Madden bus?

31:02

I don't know. That sounds like a you and Ari issue.

31:05

Yeah, well if I had a John Madden

31:07

bus and my friend was in town 10 minutes

31:09

away, you know,

31:11

it'd be like... First, they're not driving it, dude.

31:13

They have a driver. There's a guy who just

31:15

drives the bus around... He's a professional driver. Right.

31:18

Just be like, hey, go here. A

31:21

slave, if you will. I wish

31:23

I had eaten those chips. What

31:26

do you take on the road? You

31:28

don't take an RV? No. I've

31:30

never graduated that level. Just vans. Church

31:32

vans. You still drive your van

31:34

around the... No, I sold it to some pipe fitter

31:37

in Queens. Come on, you

31:39

can't say that. Especially after what Nick said about those Muslims

31:41

on the plane. Well, this guy was Eastern European. Oh, a

31:43

pipe fitter is a job. Yeah.

31:46

Yeah. Was that like... I thought

31:48

it was a slur. Oh, you thought

31:50

it was a pejorative slur. A homophobic

31:52

slur. No, no. Like a legit Ukrainian

31:54

dude who had three teeth and... It's

31:57

a good job being a pipe fitter. It's a great

31:59

job. What'd. I do. It

32:02

well they they stop a he c all

32:04

you know what i have i can see

32:06

pipe fitter with but pirate. Schools.

32:08

Are sick? See I'm sick. Perverted some cause you've

32:11

never worked a blue collar job. Your life. You

32:13

fucking what are you fucking talk about it? I

32:15

was on the blue com at the Call It

32:17

Color Comedy Tour. Success

32:20

because of fluff her and our

32:22

second this vegan be Bill Engvall

32:24

yeah Foxworthy about him and I

32:26

got i used to go to

32:28

i had such involved and then

32:30

I'd go with because skiing me

32:32

do a double hands or hey

32:34

I don't go skiing on on

32:37

Foxworthy and Tater salad. Ron.

32:39

Ron White hair salad take

32:41

lessons his ear yeah. If

32:52

you. Wanted

32:59

to. Do

33:13

to as. Soon.

33:21

As a good test has since. Passed.

33:26

His dreams: Brandy.

33:29

Others whiskies, Our.

33:35

Users: Crevasse Cia is.

33:41

That is connoisseur. There.

33:44

There's that. And there's they say

33:47

I Yasir, Arafat, and Ringer Saarland.

33:49

Were. Pretty much the same person.

33:52

Yeah, it's. Know

33:54

and Scotty Pippin are solving lotta.

33:58

Yeah. I

34:02

felt like I love you The

34:04

handsome guy he graham. yeah. Yeah.

34:07

How good looking guy! Use.

34:09

As a runner some him on one second

34:11

people every the ivy getting any at a

34:13

be one to barrel had to use him

34:16

say failure one the base was we have

34:18

only thing they shot the killers yeah basically

34:20

out every shot him in a desk all

34:22

those. Screens

34:26

up with dogs attacked us.

34:29

Who do. You

34:40

have feel physics knock on doors. A

34:42

deal could come on draw. Getting one

34:44

of your turn to force it on

34:46

to make it says how your shower

34:48

not game because you couldn't because. They.

34:54

Threw to as as as the Atlantic

34:56

Ocean the evidence or in the ocean.

34:58

Gary Miller put samantha the fact that.

35:02

Some ways just. Because.

35:08

You know I think that the Mediterranean

35:10

be? yeah. Those. Italy.

35:13

Oh. Yeah. Nora.

35:15

Oh oh yeah, I gotcha. I gotcha. I gotcha.

35:17

Yeah. Guy like I had to petco cel guy

35:20

with his little more in there on the bonus

35:22

are. A lot

35:24

of some laws. Are

35:27

unreal Thomas Village

35:30

So. He's

35:33

always. Do

35:42

I may like snails? And I

35:44

saw Milan in South Korea. Korea

35:46

Delay fuses a Billie can see.

35:51

Wait. Riley. Dude.

35:54

You're gonna love Israeli. I got to talk

35:56

about something with you. ah

35:58

do you know about a product called

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36:03

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36:05

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36:16

It's great. So let's do this. This should

36:18

make one for girls called Redchoo. Oh,

36:31

right. Yeah.

36:37

OK, so we'll start again. Yeah, yeah, we'll

36:39

start again. Last time

36:41

we did a read, Nick and I said kind of, as

36:45

you know, you know the show. We've been doing

36:47

reads for these guys for years. And finally, we

36:49

crossed the line. It got to be nice. Yeah,

36:51

we were told. We've

36:54

said plenty of horrific things. But

36:56

this one really crossed the line.

36:59

What'd you say? Something to do

37:01

with. Come

37:04

on. All

37:08

right, we could even cut that from the show. But guys,

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we're back to the show. Live via

39:12

satellite Nick Mullen. We got

39:14

Riley Walker. Guitar God. Mr.

39:18

Guaranteed 11 inches. Um,

39:20

so yeah. Uh, what were

39:23

we saying? What were

39:25

we talking about? Yeah. Nick, did I ever tell

39:27

you I opened for Riley and it was a

39:29

disaster? Yeah, you did. Yeah. I

39:32

thought it was good. Really? Yeah. I thought you were

39:35

pretty funny. I bombed it. No, no, no. I

39:37

was like, dude, I was like, I forgot about that.

39:39

I forgot about that. When indie rock crowd is there

39:42

was like a, I forgot that like 2009 to 2012, uh,

39:47

like a garage rock was a

39:49

just very male and white. Yeah. Yeah.

39:51

Yeah. Yeah. And no gay people even know. No,

39:54

it's pretty insular. Gay dropped in like when it

39:56

2013 or 2013. Yeah. Yeah. That's when gay. Yeah,

40:00

that's when pitchfork a lot of the games.

40:02

Yeah, when do you think gay started? Yeah,

40:16

yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I remember that it

40:18

was like overnight Yeah,

40:21

it was just shocking to me because

40:24

like look we live in Brooklyn. I understand I

40:26

go into a coffee shop 50

40:29

to 80 percent of the baristas are gonna be

40:31

gay or some type of new

40:33

gay Yeah, they didn't let us

40:36

squish mollows and caddiers like

40:38

I understand that you know, but there was

40:40

one guy there that was just You

40:43

know, he was just he wear like doctors Seems

40:50

like he read one too many books,

40:52

you know You know glasses that are

40:54

only for people that are like read

40:56

too many books like the very thin

40:58

wire Yes, like yeah

41:00

kind of like a Russian revolutionary

41:03

glasses. Yes I'm

41:08

a Bolshevik actually And

41:14

then we went in there one day

41:16

and he had like clowns

41:19

makeup on and And

41:21

necklaces and yeah, he was he

41:23

was really just changed his whole

41:25

vibe Yeah, I

41:27

mean it looked like Look

41:30

like he had just been to Mardi

41:32

Gras. Yeah, maybe he did Yeah,

41:35

and I said to myself I

41:38

guess I guess everyone's gay. Yeah. Anyway, it's

41:40

a Riley you actually you have a show

41:42

that just premiered as South by Southwest I'm

41:44

free. It's gonna be Or

41:47

something yeah or something and you want to tell

41:49

us about it was not really why

41:52

not come on dude I don't know. This is the business

41:54

here And if you want to get into my business of

41:56

making shmunnies you have to be like, oh, I really want

41:58

to tell you about this exciting Project and so

42:00

I don't want to pitch anything why but you're not

42:02

pitching it. It's already been picked up I don't really

42:04

want to do that why I don't know Cuz

42:07

you're humble. I'm humble. So okay, would you

42:09

rather play? I'm

42:11

not gonna play either LaBamba for

42:14

me or tell you before the rights to such

42:16

a song I don't know it's a cover that

42:18

kid fucking died in a plane crash in Wisconsin.

42:20

Yeah, not really funny to make fun of him

42:22

He's dead dude. You can fucking got wiped out

42:24

in a plane crash Not funny to play any

42:26

big not funny to do that on a comedy

42:28

show Why was he called the big

42:31

bopper because he used to get bopped off. Yeah, you see

42:33

it bopped off Yeah,

42:35

he'd be in like a Cincinnati radio station getting bopped

42:37

off by like a Hello

42:42

You know big popper Nick who's

42:45

your favorite out of those guys that died in the plane

42:47

crash when the music died the day the

42:49

music died No,

42:53

my name is rich Richie balance more of

42:55

a Chicano kind of Southern, California, that's my

42:57

background Yeah

43:01

with Lou Diamond Phillips, yeah,

43:04

yeah, I've seen that movie have you seen that movie yeah You

43:08

like that it's fine. Yeah, you see

43:10

the doors movie. Yeah, the doors movie

43:12

rules the doors movies Oh Oliver Stone,

43:14

I kind of watch it after this.

43:16

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah Kilmer at his peak

43:18

I love insanely perfect nipples, dude. He's

43:20

so handsome. He looks so fucking good.

43:22

That's kind of like the most Like

43:26

that's the fastest like hot guy to fat

43:28

guy He's fire

43:30

rock star spiral his brain like melted in the

43:32

late 90s like something. No, no, no, I'm talking

43:34

about Morrison Morrison

43:37

like they were a band for like like

43:39

11 minutes. Yeah, and he got super fat

43:41

the doors existed for 18 months Yeah,

43:44

he was just a fat like Marlon

43:46

Brando. So fat He's like eating

43:48

all the poetry he was writing His

43:53

poems are really good. They suck. They

43:55

have really good poems good

43:57

private shots Robbie Krieger. Yeah Love

44:00

Robbie. Love the creek. Love creek. Is that what

44:02

this is now? Indie rock music podcast? Yeah, we're

44:04

kind of doing a VH1 story teller. We're doing

44:06

a VH1 story teller. It's about how fat Jim

44:08

Morrison is. Nick, do you have a, like, what's

44:10

your favorite song? Of

44:13

all time? Yeah. Tequila.

44:19

Can you play Tequila for Nick? Tequila?

44:22

Yeah, Ari Shafir is not picking him

44:24

up in the bus. Do

44:26

you have a copyright to that? You're gonna get flagged. No,

44:29

it's not because it's a cover, dude. Don't worry about it.

44:36

That's in Tequila. No,

44:38

duh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh. OK, do the whole thing. No, I

44:40

don't know Tequila. Dude,

44:43

I thought you know every song. No, I don't. I

44:45

told Nick to know. I can't yes and miss right

44:47

now. All right, let's talk, man. OK. So

44:50

this is major news, Adam. You

44:52

just got mentioned on the Joe

44:54

Rogan show. I did. He's

44:57

gonna grind you up into creatine. It's

45:00

a five and a half hour podcast. And

45:03

they say the full name Adam

45:05

Dean Friedland. Dude, they

45:07

said halfway through, Joe

45:10

asked for complete silence. And

45:12

then Mark Norman goes, Adam

45:14

Dean Friedland. And

45:16

then what is it? And then they go back to doing

45:19

the rest of the show. This is gonna change things, right?

45:21

They didn't say anything about if I'm a good guy or

45:23

not, if they like me. No,

45:25

no, they just everyone stopped for a

45:27

second. It's like

45:30

one of Norman's eyes turned red. I think

45:32

he had a stroke. And he

45:34

said your name. It

45:37

says a 19 hour and 35 minute mark of a 482 hour podcast. The

45:45

man is a machine. I mean, Joe can

45:48

just go for hours and hours. I

45:50

wonder how he fucked. I mean, like he's gotta be like,

45:52

he's gotta last. I mean, he's

45:54

podcasting so much. He probably has to squeeze

45:56

in fucking. Did you watch this

45:59

for the first time? with all

46:01

those guys on there? No, I didn't see it, did

46:03

you? No, I saw that you were

46:05

mentioning I watched five minutes of it. What were

46:07

they riffing on? I don't

46:09

know. I don't understand why they're wearing the sunglasses.

46:11

They look like the California raisins. They

46:14

were probably smoking weed. Yeah,

46:16

maybe that's a thing. Joe

46:18

loves hitting you. I'm

46:20

not all about silly outfits. Yeah,

46:23

Nick, you dress pretty normal. I

46:26

think you should take podcasting seriously. You're

46:28

one of the normalist dressers in comedy.

46:31

Yeah. What

46:33

should I offer lunch? I think I fucked myself

46:35

up with these chips and his eye-mountain dew. Quest

46:38

bar. Quest bar, Luna

46:40

bar, barbecue, Carolina barbecue. Is

46:43

Questlove, did he name himself after his love

46:45

of Quest bar? Yeah, he's like, I like

46:48

the birthday cake Quest bar from the deli

46:50

so much. I'm going to make that my

46:52

name. Yeah, yeah. It's pretty funny.

46:54

He's got only four grams of net carbs, so he really wanted to get

46:56

in on it. Yeah, yeah. See, Riley

46:59

knows a lot about rock history. And

47:01

net carbs. And net carbs. Are

47:03

you getting- Questlove's deal, he just plays a

47:05

snare drum. He just sits there with a

47:07

snare drum and... That's

47:10

his old thing. I think he has other... He's

47:14

got toms. He's a hip-hop historian,

47:16

a documentary filmmaker. Yeah. So

47:19

he's like Neil deGrasse Tyson kind of. Yeah,

47:22

they do. Yeah, he knows a lot about

47:24

space. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I think, have you ever seen

47:26

them in the same room at the same time? I

47:29

wouldn't be able to tell you. I

47:31

couldn't tell you. I

47:35

wouldn't know. I always confuse those guys.

47:38

That's what I tell you. I mean, I've had to go in

47:40

for police lineups a couple of times. I've

47:43

been robbed and sexually assaulted a bunch

47:45

of your brother. Really? And

47:48

every time I say, I don't know, all

47:50

of them. Yeah. We can't. Oh,

47:52

man. Every single one of

47:54

them? No, maybe. But

47:56

wouldn't four of them be innocent? I

48:04

think it was... I can't stop eating

48:06

these chips. So

48:11

yeah, so I mean, Riley doesn't want

48:13

me to mention it, but he does

48:15

have a show potentially coming out later this year.

48:20

It's funny. With the who? Who's the which?

48:22

Robert De Niro, your thing? You're a North?

48:25

Yeah, me and Robert De Niro. So what is

48:27

it called? It's called the Riley... Riley Walker and

48:29

Friends, it comes out later here on TV. And

48:34

Robert De Niro's in it? Robert De Niro stars

48:36

in it. He plays me. It's a new vehicle

48:38

for him where he plays me, an indie rock

48:40

musician, trying to find his voice.

48:43

Is this narrative or documentary?

48:47

A docu-film. Really? Yeah,

48:50

docu-film. And you meet

48:53

other rockers on the

48:55

road? Meet other rockers on the road. Who

48:57

do you got in the mix? You'll have to watch and see.

49:00

I mean, like, you could tell us one.

49:03

No. Now let me

49:05

ask you this, Riley, because you just said you

49:07

are in a sort of like a

49:10

domestic partnership with a Mexican-American

49:13

pipe fitter. Yeah. Right.

49:16

And you filled the van. Oh,

49:19

okay. So you had to sell the van. And

49:21

it was an Eastern European, I should say. Yeah.

49:24

Okay. Whatever it was. But

49:27

with some, I'd say dire straits.

49:29

Right? And money for nothing.

49:32

Money for nothing. Yeah. Now,

49:39

we have

49:44

spent hundreds and hundreds

49:46

and hundreds of thousands

49:48

of dollars making

49:51

a show. And we

49:53

have gotten no offers. Yeah.

49:56

So the main reason I asked you on is to see if

49:58

you can maybe tell them. You sell

50:01

Apple Corps, your TV show? So you're so good

50:03

at selling. We're doing you a

50:05

favor. We're bringing you on the show. Yeah, this is

50:07

huge for you. Yeah, you got

50:09

to scratch our backs. You go march

50:11

right into my office, and you say, either

50:14

you buy my friend's show. Or I stick this knife

50:16

in my neck. I'll fucking kill

50:18

you. I

50:20

will find every woman in this office and

50:22

kill her. Just

50:27

to make a man think they're safe. And

50:30

then? And then I'm coming for the

50:32

men. Yeah, I guess you're

50:34

getting fucking, I got a cup of acid. I'm

50:38

going to acid blind every male in here. I've

50:40

got a turkey bacer and a cup full

50:43

of acid, and I put in just a

50:45

drop of battery acid in everyone's penis tip.

50:48

Just in the tip, and you'll rot from

50:50

the inside out. I stick their dick in

50:53

battery acid? Yeah. No, you

50:55

have a turkey bacer, and you withdraw a little.

50:57

Oh, I enjoy. OK. Yeah, you squeeze and then

50:59

squeeze it into the dick hole. OK, cool. Yeah,

51:01

yeah. You had to rot the inside of their

51:03

dick out first, and it goes to their mind.

51:05

You don't even have to worry about it, because

51:08

as soon as they hear these threats, they're going

51:10

to say, where do

51:12

I suck? Where's my checkbook? Yeah.

51:14

Where's my checkbook? Blink check.

51:17

What's your passion project? Listen, this is

51:19

a direct threat on my life and

51:22

every woman and man that I work

51:24

with, but you've got panache. And

51:27

I can't imagine how. Have you ever been in a limo

51:29

kit? Have you ever been in

51:31

a limo? No. No. Never

51:33

what? They give you? A limo? Yeah.

51:37

I want to say I have, but now I

51:39

can't recall a single instance where I've been in

51:41

a limo seat. You didn't go to prom in

51:43

a limo? I don't think I've ever been in

51:45

a limo. Remember in Home

51:47

Alone 2 when he rides the limousine around New

51:49

York? Yeah, so cool. When I

51:51

was a child, that was my biggest dream in

51:54

the world. To have a cheese pizza in a

51:56

limo and have no parents? I have limousine around

51:58

New York. Dad's parents. Yeah. But

52:01

no, I don't think I've actually been in a

52:03

stretch limo. How about this, dude? Ari Shaver is

52:05

having all this fun in a John Madden bus.

52:07

And first of all, it's a little rude to

52:09

you because you've talked about John Madden buses for

52:11

a while that you want to get one. It's

52:14

a passion of yours. He's kind of rubbing it in your

52:17

face and taking Uber here. You know, like,

52:20

how about you get back to- Also stepping

52:22

on my market, dude. I mean, he's doing

52:24

shows here this weekend. I've

52:26

had an ongoing problem

52:28

of respect from HBO.

52:33

You can't get none. You can't get no respect. From

52:35

HBO. So how about

52:37

this, dude? Or if you're from

52:39

John Madden. Listen, the world

52:42

is against us. The industry is against us. Riley

52:44

is against us. Pete, I don't trust. I mean,

52:46

he's doing a great job so far, but I'm

52:48

never going to fully trust him. But guess what?

52:51

He's a fucking anti-Semite, dude. Mr.

52:53

Hashimoto is- I'm cool with him,

52:55

okay? But guess what? When

52:57

you come back, you and me, Monday

53:00

morning, 9 a.m., we're

53:02

renting a limo. And we're going to

53:04

just ride around New York City. We're going to live out that dream.

53:07

No, what we're going to do is shoot another

53:09

visual short. No matter what. That's the other day,

53:12

too. I announced, I announced,

53:14

I announced. Are

53:17

you there? Yeah, you just kind of-

53:19

you told me to shut off basically. Oh, I said I

53:21

already announced it just in case you were- No, that makes

53:23

sense. Fine, fine. No, no, talk about the digital shorts. I'm

53:25

sure people are- No, no, it's- Ho, ho,

53:28

ho. Ho, ho. You

53:32

ever- like you say, you know, this reminds you of being

53:34

in bands, you know? Oh, just

53:36

the constant bitching back and forth. Can't come to terms

53:39

in anything. Kind of like, kind of like a- Oh,

53:41

wow. I didn't

53:43

realize that you played in the Adam

53:45

Friedland band. Yeah, we rock. We've got

53:47

signs. Yeah. We're

53:50

kind of like a Liam and Noel kind

53:52

of style. Yeah, we're Liam and Noel. Can

53:54

you start titling our podcast, the Joe Rogan

53:57

Experience, on YouTube? Yeah, just

53:59

to get- his attention? No,

54:01

to steal some of his audience. Or

54:06

we could just on the thumbnail image just

54:08

put Joe. Just add him

54:10

to the show and call it the

54:12

Joe Rogan Exuberance. Who knows how much

54:17

longer the Joe Rogan bump is going to

54:19

be worth? Yeah, he's getting pretty big right

54:21

now but I don't know. What

54:24

goes up must come down. Exactly.

54:27

It's just gravity. I'm looking at it

54:29

like you have to tell yourself that.

54:31

You just spend extended periods of no

54:33

going up at all. You're like, yeah,

54:35

well these guys are, no, they'll be

54:38

fine. They're going to go

54:40

down. They'll die happy with hundreds of

54:42

millions of dollars. Surrounded by

54:44

a family who loves them. All right

54:46

guys, I want to talk about March

54:48

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54:50

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was it. I

55:03

was okay. This is really

55:05

funny. He's so funny. Yeah,

55:08

he really goes there, that guy. Yeah, it's

55:10

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56:02

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56:05

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56:14

you. So you're telling me that crazy

56:16

story from back in the day before

56:19

the show started. Well, the streets have

56:21

no name. Well,

56:24

the streets have no name. Songs

56:32

about how he's flacked out on

56:35

Zanny's and didn't know where he was. Oh,

56:37

Bono. Yeah, yeah, Bono. Yeah, yeah. I heard

56:39

Bono snazzy. Does he? Heavy. Heavy. He does

56:41

bag. Oh, dude, Graham, a knight. What about

56:44

the edge? The edge is fucked up. Everybody

56:46

knows that. Yeah, the edge is fucked up.

56:48

I thought the edge just beats, but doesn't

56:50

count. Yeah, it's about edging, obviously. That's such

56:52

a gimme. He was like proto.

56:54

That's a classic rock joke. Yeah, this was like

56:57

the late 70s before edging was even like a

56:59

thing. He was beating off and getting to the

57:01

limit and he was like, I have to stop.

57:03

Yeah. And then Richard Gere saw it and was

57:05

like, I'm going to take that up one notch.

57:07

Yeah, yeah. And he put a rat up his

57:09

ass. I'll do it with a rodent in my

57:11

eye. Yeah, which is totally par for the course

57:13

these days. It's totally chill now. Yeah. You know,

57:15

so if you could like make your perfect guitarist,

57:17

you put a little bit of the edge, the

57:20

edge, you put a little bit of what? The Johnny

57:22

Marr. A little bit of Johnny Marr. You

57:24

don't like the Smith. Not a huge Smith.

57:26

Why not? I don't know. It's just a lot of

57:28

bitching, I guess. I mean, I can't say anything that

57:31

hasn't said it, but you know that it's, they speak

57:33

to Mexican American culture. They have like, I think they

57:35

do have a big Latino fan base. Yeah. Yeah. They

57:38

love that and Tweety Bird.

57:42

They love Tweety Bird? Like T-shirts with

57:44

like gangster Tweety Bird. I just associate Tweety Bird

57:46

with like, I'd go to the water park when

57:48

I was a kid and like really fat chicks

57:50

would have like a Tweety Bird tattoo on their

57:52

foot. It was kind of a fat chick thing.

57:54

Yeah. You know what I found out like later

57:56

in life and it felt weird, not like I

57:58

was trying to fuck Tweety Bird. But yeah, you

58:00

were I found out it was a guy Tweety-birds

58:03

a guy. Yeah, I didn't know if it was like

58:05

I thought it was like I felt Oh, I

58:07

didn't know it was a guy or girl. I never even thought of

58:10

it. I wasn't trying to fuck Tweety-birds I wasn't perverted when I was

58:12

a kid. I don't know. Yeah, what's the number one cartoon you'd fuck?

58:15

Tommy Pickles still

58:22

Jewish American family. Yeah, I know they had

58:25

a Passover special. Yeah early representation for me

58:28

I like staying under the radar and I don't like

58:30

flashing. You're hiding out. Yeah. Yeah. I'm like Rugrats

58:33

is living out loud holes. Yeah. Yeah, I

58:35

like just like the squish of Tommy Pickles

58:37

diaper I like being more closeted about my

58:39

Judaism. Yeah, or addict about my Judy. Oh

58:42

Lord Come

58:44

on now. Come on. I can make those jokes. You can

58:46

make those your family's 100% German Mine.

58:49

Yeah, no Walker's a English

58:52

name. I don't know if I have much German in me

58:54

Walker in Northern England Often

58:56

the north. Yeah, blimey northern

58:59

England like the factory record. Yuck.

59:01

Oh You're from York. You

59:03

love land. You're from like a like a

59:05

coal town a coal town. Yeah. Yeah

59:08

Cross-eyed Anglo like drunks. Yeah. Yeah.

59:10

Yeah good people. They get wasted early

59:12

I mean wasted early cuz the bars

59:14

closed at like what midnight or something.

59:16

Yeah, so you're like six. They're black.

59:19

Yeah Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's nasty. What's

59:21

the most fun city to drink in

59:23

from your days on the road? I

59:26

don't know. I'm just like a raging alcoholic. So probably just

59:28

the van on the highway It's

59:30

like in the backseat alone like thinking about

59:32

killing yourself. I say Tokyo. Yeah, Tokyo is

59:34

a good place to drink too It is

59:36

really good smoke inside. Yeah, you're like bummed

59:39

if you smoke outside Yeah, well, I did

59:41

um, I was there with our boys. I

59:43

was in Tokyo We did um, I did

59:45

scar tissue and karaoke Yeah And

59:47

I asked if they had red hot chili peppers and

59:49

they were late they didn't know what it was and

59:51

then they were like Oh the red chilies they

59:54

call them the red chilies over there called the

59:56

red chilies over there. Very nice. Yeah, John for

59:58

shante. I crushed scar tissue Yeah? You

1:00:00

like John Frasanté? Um,

1:00:02

I like... I like... Uh...

1:00:05

The Brown Bunny soundtrack? The solo...

1:00:07

the solo stuff where he came

1:00:09

back from rehab and

1:00:11

his voice was in falsetto. Yeah, he kills it.

1:00:13

Why is my album The Street People? That'd be

1:00:15

so funny if you came back from rehab and

1:00:17

you were like, Hey dude, what's up? Yeah, and

1:00:19

I had a low five damage. I'm living Cleveland's

1:00:21

over now! And

1:00:24

I did the soundtrack for Brown Bunny, that movie

1:00:26

where the dude got a blowjob. I thought that...

1:00:28

I thought that, uh, Vince DiGali did all of

1:00:30

his own soundtrack. I mean, it was Vince DiGali. No, I think

1:00:32

John Frasanté had a hand in that. They kinda look a little...

1:00:34

John Frasanté call in. What did

1:00:36

Dave Matthews say? Nothing? Never got back to me.

1:00:38

You know... He's busy jamming! He's in the middle

1:00:40

of a half hour jam right now. Well, close

1:00:42

it. Well, close it. Of forty... of forty-one. Dude,

1:00:44

he's just... he's ripping ants marching right now. Yeah,

1:00:46

he's... Two trip? Three

1:00:48

trippin'? I

1:00:50

did Ice Cold Fatty. You

1:00:53

what? I did Ice Cold Fatty. Like a joint?

1:00:56

No, in the... after you go

1:00:58

see a Dead Show, you go to the

1:01:00

lot. You go to Shakedown Street. Sure. And

1:01:02

that's really half the experience. It's fuckin'... They

1:01:04

call it Gray Street in the Dave Matthews

1:01:06

caravan, yeah. Gray Street? Yeah. Why is that?

1:01:08

Because you have a song called Gray Street.

1:01:13

Makes sense, right? Yeah. Yeah,

1:01:16

I went to Shakedown and my

1:01:18

boy... my one boy's sober and

1:01:20

he's... Nice. He's a wharf rat. But

1:01:23

he's like... one of the... he's like, I gotta show

1:01:25

you the experience. He's like, I'm gonna get you an

1:01:27

Ice Cold Fatty. Okay. And

1:01:30

it was a balloon. Oh,

1:01:32

you did a whippet? Yeah. But then, like, the

1:01:34

balloons guys were like... There was like a hippie guy that

1:01:36

had two and he was doing it and he's like, this

1:01:38

is the best part of my life, man. I

1:01:42

did whippets before and I pissed my pants. Really? Yeah,

1:01:44

yeah. I was sitting in a lawn chair doing whippets

1:01:46

around a fire when I was in high school. I

1:01:49

did whippets and I just immediately started pissing my pants.

1:01:51

And I was like, it's beer. I spilled beer. Like,

1:01:53

I had to, like, get out of it somehow. You

1:01:56

got out of it? Then I drove drunk home. John

1:02:00

Mayer. I was. Wow. So

1:02:03

you could do any of his

1:02:05

songs? Yeah,

1:02:08

I could play anything from the

1:02:10

John Mayer songbook. Fucking

1:02:13

amazing. Yeah. Including

1:02:16

wearing a puka shell necklace and having like a

1:02:18

shaved chest. Yeah, I can do it. He shaves

1:02:20

his chest? He's got to, yeah. He's got a

1:02:22

good body. Yeah. He's got a

1:02:24

great body. He did say that one thing in

1:02:26

Playboy magazine. What? About how

1:02:29

his dick is like David Duke. He's

1:02:32

got a white supremacist dick? He was just basically like,

1:02:35

he was not attracted to black women. Oh, damn. He

1:02:37

could have put that any other way. That's a crazy

1:02:39

way to put it. He could have

1:02:41

put that any other way. Yeah, my dick is like

1:02:43

Adolf Hitler. What about you? Who

1:02:46

would my dick be compared to? Probably,

1:02:53

who's the

1:02:56

second guy in Garden State that's not the

1:02:58

dude from Scrubs? Maggie

1:03:01

Gyllenhaal's husband. Yeah, Maggie Gyllenhaal's

1:03:03

husband. You're as far as the guard. Yeah. Why?

1:03:07

Just because like in the mid 2000s, we were

1:03:09

kind of in this quirky twee thing. You

1:03:14

know, like it was like a serious

1:03:17

sort of role player, you

1:03:19

know, throughout the 90s. It was like very

1:03:21

dedicated to the craft, learning off

1:03:23

Broadway sort of small black box situations.

1:03:27

And then in the mid 2000s, once the shins dropped,

1:03:29

it was like, I'm twee now. So

1:03:32

like, I don't know, like, could you

1:03:34

maybe put Nick and I in touch with these

1:03:36

guys? Yeah, definitely. I would like

1:03:38

to work on it together. If you could get my music synced

1:03:40

in it, then we could all sort of benefit

1:03:42

from it equally. Do you want to maybe write like a

1:03:44

theme song maybe for the Adam Freelance show? I mean, I

1:03:46

could write a song for the Adam Freelance show. Do you

1:03:49

want to just do it right now? There's something in the

1:03:51

way she moves. Looks

1:03:53

my way, calls my name.

1:03:57

It's called Something in the Way She Moves. I

1:04:02

think it's pretty good. Yeah, definitely influenced by James Taylor

1:04:04

and Carole King. Riley Walker

1:04:06

everyone, thanks for watching. Sorry I'm not

1:04:08

Nick, thank you. We

1:04:11

love him!