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Today I am talking about and

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asking you to start using the word

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partner instead of the words

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husband or wife, and I'll share

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why you should and how

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it'll help you shift the power dynamics

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in your relationship. Let's get started, shall

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we? The power of words

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in your romantic relationship, words are more than mere clusters of

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words. They carry weight, history, and

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have implications that go way beyond

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their dictionary definitions.

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So the words you choose in your

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relationships are extremely significant,

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especially the ones you use to

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identify your significant other to

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yourself or to each other or

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to others in your life. It's

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essential to understand the impact of these

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labels, especially the conventional

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terms husband and wife, and how they may

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unconsciously and inadvertently

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perpetuate inequality and an imbalance of

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power in your relationship. The traditional titles of husband and wife

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have deep, long ranging historical, religious,

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societal, and traditional roots

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at a time when women were deemed

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secondary, less than, and even

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subservient to men. In addition to

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being considered the property of

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men, the term husband

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originally meant householder or

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housemaster in Old Norse,

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while wife simply referred to a woman,

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like wife equaled the word woman.

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These labels show an imbalance of power

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and drastically and dramatically contribute

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to the building and,

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propagation of inequality in our

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relationships. As I said, words

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hold immense meaning and create

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influence in our relationships. They

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shape how you view and interact with your significant

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other. And that's why it's important to consider the

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impact of the labels we use, especially

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when it comes to the words husband and

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wife. So here are five ways those

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words may diminish the value

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of women. There's historical

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inequality. The etymology or history

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of these terms shows a

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demonstrated imbalance of power,

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even in the legal world, with

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husband assuming a dominant role.

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An example of this is women could not get their own

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credit card or bank account until the mid

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1970s on their own without

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their spouses signing on

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their behalf. Secondly, there's a

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perpetuation of stereotypes that's really

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hurting society today and

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hurting women, causing pain to women

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who are so desperately and

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not desperately, but are working so

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hard to take care of their families,

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because, frankly, the man in

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the relationship or their spouse or partner is

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not showing up or is not contributing the

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way they need to or the way family

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needs them to. So these titles

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perpetuate and enforce gender stereotypes,

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with the wife expected to maintain the

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household and the husband being the primary

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breadwinner. This causes issues in,

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single family households and

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where the caregiver

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or primary breadwinner is taking care of the

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family and ensuring, wanting to make sure that their needs are

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met. But when you live in a

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society where the wife or

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women are expected to stay home and take care of the family and

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not get pregnant and not have babies and be

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treated as complete equals in the

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workplace, it's really challenging, because at the end

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of the day, men and women are different. Our needs

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are different, our requirements are different, our

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biology and physiology is different. And

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trying to keep things equal,

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in a mathematical or logical sense, just

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doesn't work. And it creates huge issues for us as

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women. So when you shift to start using

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the word partner instead of husband and wife,

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you model and demonstrate that you've grown past the

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limitations of these gender roles and

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stereotypes in your relationships.

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Role conflicts can also start to be eliminated

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by, shifting your thinking and

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treating your partner and yourself as equal

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partners in your relationship. And when you start

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using the word partner in the workplace,

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it does start to shift the power dynamic.

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The words husband and wife also infer

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limited independence. The traditional roles

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associated with husband and wife can hinder or even

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discourage individual growth and independence.

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I have worked with couples where

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just, shifting their

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perspective on using the words husband or wife to

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partner created a different mindset,

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a different way of seeing each

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other, and seeing each other as partners in

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life instead of these gender

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based roles. It really

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changed the dynamic in their relationship. The other

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thing, using those terms also creates

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imposed responsibilities, because those terms come

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with cultural, financial, religious, and

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societal expectations that then

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limit a woman's potential and freedom.

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Having the mindset and

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the historical baggage of using the

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terms husband and wife

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unintentionally creates

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an energetic subservience in the

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relationship. It creates a

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woman, to have moments

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when they feel inferior or not

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worthy in the relationship. And

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simply shifting to the word partner will create

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healthy power dynamics from the

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unhealthy. Because the historical baggage

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of using husband and wife inadvertently reinforces unhealthy power dynamics in

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the relationship, there are ten reasons to make

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this shift from using the term husband

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or wife to embracing

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the word partner. The first is

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equality. The word partner immediately

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implies an equal partnership with shared

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responsibilities, decisions, and power.

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The word husband and wife don't. The second is respect.

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Using the word partner instead of husband or wife

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signifies mutual respect and understanding,

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free from ancestral or historical

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baggage. Respect diminishes in

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relationships where one partner is thought of

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as less than the worth of the other. And

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this happens time and time and time again in

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relationships. I'm sure as you're hearing this,

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you can actually think of couples or

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situations where you've observed couples where this may be

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true. The third one is flexibility.

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The word partner doesn't confine you to traditional

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gender, roles, allowing for

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flexibility in defining your relationship with your

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partner your way. The fourth

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one is individual and relationship growth. It

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encourages individual growth and independence within

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your relationship, but it also allows

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for space and encourages growing together as a

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couple. Collaboration choosing the term partner

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instead of husband or wife emphasizes

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teamwork, fostering

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cooperation, collaboration and mutual

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support. It's also inclusive

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as a gender neutral term. It doesn't have any

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baggage about relationship roles or

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expectations, so it makes it

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inclusive for your relationship and frankly,

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all types of relationships. The

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term partner shows and demonstrates progress

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that women have made

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tremendous progress and strides over the last

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century. This subtle language shift, aligns

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with progress towards relationship equality and

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societal and personal evolution.

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Using the word partner also creates empowerment.

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It empowers both individuals and promotes a

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sense of shared ownership and commitment.

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Open communication using the word partner

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immediately melts any

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walls that are up that are created from

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the terms husband and wife in the historical

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connotation and context of them.

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Using the word partner immediately encourages open

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and equal communication. It really

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just shifts the energy in your body to being more

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open. And lastly, a

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partnership signifies a strong bond that can

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withstand challenges, create resilience

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in the long term in the relationship.

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Embracing this word

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partner, this simple language

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change will build confidence and strengthen your relationship,

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and frankly, it models healthy relationship

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behaviors with equality and

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inclusion. As I was doing my research

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around the power of using the word

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partner, I read time and time again

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that experts advocate for the importance of

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respectful language in your relationships.

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They and I believe that the choice of words

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can influence how you perceive your relationship

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roles and consequently then affect your

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interactions, your feelings,

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expectations and experiences in your

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relationship. The shift to using the word

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partner is a consequential

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and crucial essential step forward in

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fostering healthier communication and balance in your

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relationship. So today, I invite

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you to choose your words wisely. The

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simple action of choosing to say partner instead of

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husband, or wife can contribute significantly

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to nurturing equality in your relationship and

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in yourself. Remember, language is

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powerful and the words you choose matter. So

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consider the impact of your language choices on your

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relationships going forward and get started by

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using the term partner and

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observe as you use this word, how

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it fosters greater equality, collaboration

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and open communication within yourself and in

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your romantic partnership. Love

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is a partnership, and there's no better word

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to encapsulate that than

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partner. By the way, if you feel

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that your partner and your relationship makes you feel like

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you are inferior at times, or you

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feel like you are dishonored, disrespected,

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or even dismissed or not, paid

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attention to I invite you to schedule a relationship

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coaching session with me so that I can help

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you build a more equal power dynamic

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into your relationship. You can do that

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by going to www.

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Dot Relationshiphuddle

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me. I, look forward to meeting you there.