First things first… we have no fucking idea what we’re talking about. We have no official qualifications when it comes to fertility, pregnancy, parenting, relationships, …nada. So if you’ve come here looking for certified, reliable advice, you’ve taken a wrong turn. 

We’re just two gals, who love a tipple, who’ve been/are going through it, and wanna uncover the unspoken nitty, gritty, sticky, tricky, lonely, funny, wild shit that never gets spoken about out loud. 

So if you’re up on your fifth feed of the night, preparing for the romantic, perfectly timed and temperature tested, pre breakfast, legs up attempt at love (ha! *baby) making, or just want to see if you can make sense of any of this mayhem along with us, we’d love to have you. 

Sincerely, what the actual fuck, Birdbones & Bandit 🍷🍼👯‍♀️