0:28

Hello , today I have with me

0:30

Lindsay Bermudez . Lindsay

0:32

is the mother of two and the co-founder

0:35

of Baby Ceto , an inclusive

0:37

online community dedicated to

0:39

connecting parents with family support

0:41

service providers serving Northern

0:44

Virginia . Today , lindsay

0:46

is here to share her birth journey and

0:48

a bit about how that inspired her to create

0:50

Baby Ceto . Lindsay , welcome

0:52

and thank you for joining me . Hi , kelly

0:54

, thanks so much for having me . I'm so excited to

0:57

hear this and I love Baby Ceto and I

0:59

love what you're doing and I wish I'd had it when my kids were

1:01

little .

1:01

But thank you . I know I wish I had it too . I

1:03

feel like I hear that a lot from moms with

1:05

toddler or older kids who are like why wasn't this

1:07

around before ?

1:09

Yeah yeah , but that's why you made it .

1:11

Yes , so hopefully we can serve all the

1:13

new moms and growing families Exactly

1:15

.

1:15

Well , tell me about your birth stories

1:17

. You have a three-year-old and a five-year-old .

1:19

Yes . So I guess I can

1:21

start with my five-year-olds , since she

1:24

was my first pregnancy

1:26

, labor , delivery , all the things . She was

1:28

born three days early . So

1:31

I was at home I think it was a Friday

1:33

night I was just laying

1:36

in bed watching TV and then all of

1:38

a sudden I felt like maybe I was peeing

1:40

, but I didn't know what was going on . So

1:42

I kind of was like we're gonna stood up

1:44

and then it was

1:46

like a bit of a slow trickle . So I was like what's

1:48

happening ? Am I peeing ? I don't know . So I went to

1:50

the bathroom and then by the time I got there it was like a

1:53

big whoosh . So my water had broken . So I

1:55

was like , oh gosh , this is starting

1:57

, this is happening . So I called to my husband

1:59

my brother-in-law was over and

2:01

they were like watching TV or something . So I was

2:03

like where would I just scream

2:06

to them . And so of course we're kind of like

2:09

in panic mode because it's their first child . Call

2:11

the doctor . Because I was like I think I

2:14

don't know if I still wait till I have contractions

2:16

, I don't remember . Do we just go in ? So we called

2:18

the doctor on call line and they're like no

2:21

, since your water broke , come in . So I

2:23

took a quick shower , got

2:25

my hospital bag , we

2:27

got all packed up , we went in and then , like on

2:29

the drive , I started feeling some contractions

2:32

, very mild . But I was like , okay

2:34

, yes , this is happening . Called my parents

2:36

, texted some friends because we lived in

2:39

Falls Church and we were driving

2:41

to DC . So on the drives

2:43

, started having some contractions . We got there

2:45

, luckily , we got checked in pretty quickly

2:47

and I had always known that I wanted

2:49

to have an epidural . I was like I want to wait

2:52

as long as I can , but I do want an epidural

2:54

. So got all

2:56

hooked up to the monitor . It was in my room

2:58

, contractions were getting stronger and I

3:00

was like I'm gonna wait , I'm gonna

3:02

wait . And then finally my husband was like why just

3:05

just get it , because they're kind of getting worse

3:07

? And they were also like there might be a wait

3:09

for the anesthesiologist . So like he's like , just

3:11

do it . And I was like , okay , okay . So we asked

3:13

for the epidural . I don't think

3:15

it took too long , maybe like 30 minutes . And

3:17

then the anesthesiologist was there . So

3:20

during that time got a little nervous

3:22

, felt a little sick . Luckily I didn't

3:24

throw up . I thought I was going

3:26

to with . That's like a fear of mine . I hate throwing up

3:28

, so like , oh , I hope this doesn't happen . Got

3:31

the epidural . It kicked in . It was great

3:33

. Oh , I forgot to mention this but I

3:35

did have a doula for my first birth . A

3:37

cousin of mine had a doula . She highly recommended

3:40

it and just because it

3:42

was my first labor , my husband also isn't

3:44

good with like blood and just medical

3:46

things . So I was like I'm definitely going to need a

3:48

support person . I also kind of get anxious

3:51

in medical settings . It

3:53

was really funny . We got to the hospital , got in the room

3:55

and then my husband

3:57

kept saying do you want me to call Amy ? And our

3:59

doula's name was Amy , but

4:01

I also have an aunt Amy . So

4:03

I thought he met my aunt Amy and I'm like what

4:05

is he talking about ? So I was like no

4:08

, don't , like , don't call me an Amy . And

4:10

then like later on then I was like , oh

4:12

yes , call the . Do call doula

4:14

Amy . So luckily she came

4:16

, she made it , got that epidural and

4:19

that definitely helped . I was very happy

4:22

with the decision to get that . After it kicked

4:24

in I could feel like it just made

4:26

me think of like the dentist , like I could feel

4:28

the pressure , but it didn't hurt . So they

4:30

were tracking my contractions . And then

4:32

my doula had her little blow up bed

4:34

and got herself set up and was like

4:37

, okay , we're going to be here for a while

4:39

. This was like I don't know , probably

4:41

like midnight at this point , and

4:44

I just remember I was watching HGTV

4:46

, feeling my contractions

4:48

, and then I don't know , I guess we

4:50

, you know , the doula was like try to rest

4:52

. So , but I think I was just . I had so

4:55

much adrenaline , it was just so excited

4:57

. I was like I cannot sleep right now . How

4:59

do people actually sleep ? So my husband

5:01

might have slept for a while . The doula

5:03

was like resting . And then I

5:05

remember feeling it and they were like when it feels

5:08

like you have to poop , let us know or something

5:10

, or that's like a sign that it's going

5:12

to be time to push . I was feeling more

5:15

and more pressure . I didn't say

5:17

anything , the duel was there , but I was like , okay , they

5:19

came in at like 5 AM

5:21

. They're like has anyone been in to check you

5:23

in a while ? I was like , no , not really . So

5:26

the nurse checked me and she was like , oh , it's time to

5:28

push . Stuff was like what

5:30

. So in that moment

5:32

I think I was not ready for it to have happened

5:34

so fast . But the duel was there . I was like , okay

5:37

. So , as I said , a little anxious

5:39

with medical settings and I think just being like

5:41

you know it's go time , I think that made

5:43

me anxious . So I started feeling a little bit

5:45

like I was going to pass out . My doula

5:48

had like peppermint essential oil

5:50

and she was like use this is going

5:52

to help . And then she was luckily communicating this

5:54

to the nurses for me . They ended up

5:56

like putting an oxygen mask on me

5:58

to help . So we started pushing

6:00

and they're monitoring

6:03

Millie , my baby , and I guess her heart rate

6:05

dropped . So all

6:07

of a sudden the doctor is

6:09

like prepping an OR . So

6:11

I'm like what ? Luckily my doula

6:13

is there . She's like okay , this is what's happening . The

6:15

heart rate dropped . It's okay , they

6:18

might have to do this but we're going to try . So

6:20

he was like okay , we're going to try to use the vacuum

6:22

. My doula helped coordinate and

6:24

communicate all this to me and then

6:26

, luckily , we did like another on the next contraction

6:29

. We pushed , they vacuumed her . They

6:31

also did an apesiatomy and luckily

6:33

they got her out . So I was saved

6:35

from having to go to emergency C-section

6:37

but it was definitely a little scary

6:39

. My husband was like about to pass out , so

6:42

the doula was with me helping

6:44

me get through the labor . My mom was

6:46

with my husband on the other side of the room

6:48

consoling him . But luckily , yeah

6:50

, she came out . She was fine . She

6:53

weighed six pounds and four

6:56

ounces and was healthy . Of

6:58

course I think they had to do like a bunch of extra

7:00

tests on her since her heart rate dropped . So

7:02

I felt like forever before I got to hold

7:05

her . Bobby , my husband got to hold

7:07

her first and then they finally

7:09

gave her to me after like everything checked out and she

7:11

was fine and I just remember like ugly crying

7:13

and just being so happy and yeah

7:16

, so that was the birth story

7:18

for Millie .

7:19

Do you remember if they told you , if

7:22

they figured out a reason for the heart rate

7:24

?

7:24

to drop . I think she was just . I think they said like

7:26

she , maybe it's because she was coming so fast

7:28

, Like she couldn't adjust to the pressure of

7:30

the birth canal .

7:32

I just didn't know if there was like , sometimes the umbilical

7:34

cord will be the cause of that .

7:36

Yeah , I don't think . I think everything was fine with the umbilical

7:38

cord , but that was definitely an

7:41

unexpected like chance . I'm just glad

7:43

it worked out .

7:44

Yeah , and then she was crying and

7:46

stuff and doing all this she was crying

7:48

yeah , she was fine .

7:49

I was like my nephew had to get

7:51

vacuumed as well and he definitely had like cone

7:53

head so I was a little worried she might have a spout

7:56

, but luckily her head . I mean it was one

7:58

vacuum suction go .

8:00

So yeah , I think that they most

8:03

of the time they'll try to put it on so that it's not

8:05

like on there so firmly and

8:08

then just guide the head while you're pushing . So

8:10

if it's not like a I mean , ideally

8:12

it's not a situation where they're tugging , it's like

8:14

a guiding . And then how did

8:16

your apesia to me heal ?

8:17

It was fine . I don't remember having any issues . I mean

8:19

I think that was a thing too . It

8:21

just felt like it took forever to get like stitched

8:23

up after , and I was also waiting to hold

8:25

melee , so it felt like it was taking a really long time

8:28

. But it was fine

8:30

. I mean , I was like , am I going to have to get stitches

8:33

removed ? But luckily it's all the dissolving

8:35

stitches and I just

8:37

like did my sit bath

8:39

like regularly to make sure everything

8:41

was healing properly .

8:43

Yeah , they're really good at making sure everybody

8:45

has a sit bath . And so then , how is postpartum

8:47

for you , for your first ?

8:49

Postpartum was fairly it

8:52

was good . I think my main concern

8:54

and issue that kind of made

8:56

it difficult was breastfeeding . So I

8:58

knew I wanted to try

9:00

to breastfeed and do my best

9:02

. I wasn't like it has to be this way , but

9:04

that was my goal and it was definitely

9:07

hard . I mean I left the

9:09

hospital with like cuts on my nipples

9:12

because she just like wasn't slatching well

9:14

and it was so painful . So after

9:16

I went home I had been

9:19

doing prenatal yoga at Virginia

9:21

Hospital Center so I had known about a breastfeeding

9:23

group they had there with Susan Howard . I

9:26

was a lactation consultant in Arlington so

9:28

I went to one of those groups and it was super

9:30

helpful . I got advice

9:32

from the other moms and then also Susan

9:34

facilitated things and also shared about

9:36

her services . So I ended up working one-on-one

9:39

with Susan to try and improve

9:42

my breastfeeding situation . I was using

9:44

nipple shields all the

9:46

time and it just didn't seem like

9:48

she was latching while we're getting

9:50

enough . So Susan kind of helped me figure

9:52

that out and we did the waits before

9:55

and after and she did help me get my supply

9:57

up . But then when

9:59

Millie was like five or six weeks , she

10:02

had blood in her stool and

10:05

Was like crying . Of course it's the

10:07

middle of the night right when this happens . And

10:09

so we took her to Anova

10:12

and we were like what is this ? So

10:14

basically we learned she had milk

10:17

protein intolerance and that's how it

10:19

like manifested for her . So they at

10:21

the hospital , they gave her some Nutramigen

10:24

, which is hypoallergenic formula . You'd

10:27

be fed her that . She took it fried in a bottle and

10:29

then I tried to eliminate dairy soy

10:31

for like two weeks after that and then breastfeed

10:34

again , but she still

10:36

. She had like bright green poops . So

10:38

for any help out there , I

10:41

mean it was just something we were Supplementing

10:43

with formula . So I was like , oh , I know breastfed

10:45

poops are like yellow , but maybe because

10:47

we have a little bit of formula and there

10:49

too , that's why the color is different . But

10:52

luckily , at the breastfeeding group I brought that

10:54

up and Susan was like no

10:56

, that shouldn't be happening . So that was like our first

10:58

clue , and I think shortly thereafter was when

11:00

she had the blood in her stool . So we ended

11:02

up just taking her , I stopped

11:04

breastfeeding , we

11:06

ended up putting her fully on the new Tramogen

11:09

for her first year and she did great on that

11:11

. She was the chunkiest baby ever

11:14

and I mean it smelled

11:16

terrible , but she was happy and

11:18

didn't have any GI issues on the

11:20

new tramogen . So other than

11:22

breastfeeding , I feel like postpartum

11:24

what went pretty smoothly . I

11:26

have my in-laws lived close by

11:28

, so we had their support . And

11:31

then my parents also Lived

11:33

with us from when Millie was

11:35

three months until she was one

11:37

, so not that like immediate Fourth

11:40

trimester , but they were there too to

11:42

support with having our new baby

11:44

Nice .

11:46

So then go ahead and share . Yeah , your

11:48

second delivery and kind of how

11:50

it's juxtaposed with your first

11:53

. It is so different

11:55

.

11:56

So with Ruben I was pregnant , I kind

11:58

of wanted to do the same Same

12:01

thing as I did with Millie , like get in

12:03

, get an epidural and just go through

12:05

kind of the same motions . And Ruben , of course

12:07

, had another idea , as babies do

12:09

. But I it was

12:11

like a week before he was due I went

12:14

into labor . So I had been dilated

12:16

like three or four centimeters for about a week

12:18

I think . I felt some like mild Braxton

12:20

Hicks contractions . Actually

12:22

I did , because once , I think , we called the hospital or

12:24

I was like we might be coming in , but then I felt

12:27

okay , so we didn't go . But it was

12:29

about two thirty in the morning

12:31

I woke up to a sharp

12:33

contraction and I was like , oh , okay , that's interesting

12:35

. So I just kind of like laid in bed playing on

12:38

my phone . I was like , let me see what happens . So

12:40

probably like 10 or 15 minutes later another

12:42

really sharp contraction . So like , oh

12:44

, this is happening , okay . So I woke up , my

12:47

husband got my stuff together

12:49

I think I might have taken a quick shower again

12:51

, thinking like , oh , this is , if I did last

12:53

time , I'll do this again and the contraction

12:55

started coming faster . My

12:57

husband called my mother-in-law

12:59

so we live in Annandale . My mother-in-law

13:01

is in Falls Church so she was

13:04

gonna come to our house to watch Millie

13:06

, who was Two , just

13:09

over two at that point while we went to the hospital

13:11

. So again she's on

13:13

her way . I'm having really

13:16

sharp contractions that are coming faster

13:18

and faster . I went to stand outside

13:20

because I was moaning and in pain and

13:22

I couldn't even control it and I was like I'm gonna wake up

13:24

Millie and let me go outside . My husband

13:26

calls our arm , call doctor , gets

13:29

ahold of him and then is like what do

13:31

we do ? She's in labor because we're in Annandale

13:33

. I was supposed to deliver again in Sibley and

13:35

it's in DC . And the

13:38

doctor's like well , first thing doctor

13:40

says to my husband is that your other

13:42

child screaming in the back ? And

13:44

he's like no , that's my wife . So then the doctor's

13:46

like if you have to go somewhere else , you have to go somewhere

13:48

else . So luckily our you live like a mile

13:50

down the road from an over fare fax . So

13:53

get everything packed up , get in the car

13:55

. It's like three , 12

13:58

. At this point I think we looked at the time

14:00

because I remember as we're pulling out of the driveway we

14:02

call Bobby's mom . She still wasn't at our house

14:04

. But I was like we got to go because I kept , I

14:07

was screaming , I was like he's coming

14:09

and I could just feel the pressure

14:11

coming down , like I know what this feeling

14:13

is . And he is about to come out . So

14:15

my husband obviously very frazzled and and

14:18

then calls his mom as

14:20

we're leaving . He's like we gotta go

14:22

, we gotta go , we're leaving . She's like , okay , I'm almost

14:25

there . So we literally left Millie

14:27

in the house , like just locked her in the house

14:29

, left Before his mom had

14:31

even arrived . We're going down

14:33

the road and my husband's like what do I do

14:35

? What do I do ? I'm like just get to the hospital

14:38

. So we pull in . He

14:40

pulls into , like the ambulance bay

14:42

and then of course I'm like this is not where you'll

14:44

get . But he

14:46

pulls in and it was so great that he did

14:49

because they like see us nurses come

14:51

running out . He's like my wife's in labor

14:53

. So they come up to

14:55

the side of the car I'm still screaming , he's coming

14:57

out and they're like okay , okay , they get

14:59

me on a stretcher and they start

15:02

rolling me up . So then I guess a

15:04

security guy says to my husband like I'll

15:06

take your car a , park it , no worries . And

15:08

they tell him like wait here . A

15:10

nurse comes to get him . As they're feeling

15:12

me , they had to take me up to a different floor

15:14

and we live being somewhere else . And a nurse comes

15:16

and is like are you dad ? He's like , yeah , you're like

15:19

we got a run . So apparently they run

15:21

with him through the hospital While

15:23

they're carting me down the hallway . They're like how many weeks

15:26

are you ? I mean , they have like none of my information

15:28

, so they don't know what we get

15:30

into the room . I'm screaming , I'm

15:32

in like incredible pain and

15:34

of course I'm like I want an up and down

15:37

. And they're like , oh no

15:39

, I can't do an up and down at this point

15:42

, so sorry . And so of course I

15:44

was like this is my worst nightmare . It's happening

15:46

, no pain medication . So

15:48

luckily the like nurses and the team were

15:51

great . They get my husband up there and of course

15:53

my husband tells the nurse like I'm not good with blood

15:55

. So she walks him

15:57

with his back to me around the

16:00

room and then till he's like

16:02

next to my head . Then she turns him around

16:05

and then one of the other nurses looks at him

16:07

and she's like someone , get this guy some some

16:09

orange juice . She's like , sir , you cannot pass out . We

16:11

don't treat dads here , we only treat moms

16:13

. So they

16:16

get him orange juice and I had been asking for water

16:18

the whole time . I just remember my mouth was so

16:20

dry and I was like I just want to swallow

16:22

, like can I please get some water ? And I

16:24

don't even remember maybe they got me some

16:26

before I delivered . But so

16:29

the contractions are coming hard there . The nurses

16:31

are like holding my legs , bobby's , up by

16:33

my head , and they're like you have to push

16:35

on the next contraction and I was like I

16:37

can't , I can't , but somehow

16:40

I did it and I think it was probably

16:42

like a couple rounds

16:44

of pushing , like couple contractions

16:47

and pushing , and then he came out and it was super

16:49

painful but it happened and

16:51

I was just glad that

16:53

it was over so fast . So we

16:55

had left our house at 312 and

16:58

he was born at 333 . So

17:00

it was super fast . So I'm glad my

17:02

husband went in the ambulance bag because

17:04

if not , if we went into like the ER entrance , I

17:06

probably would have like delivered on the floor of like

17:08

checking in . So my God , it

17:11

was very lucky . So that was a very

17:13

different situation with Ruben

17:16

being born . But he was fine . He was seven

17:18

pounds , 10 ounces , cried

17:20

right away , no issue . So like that was cool

17:22

. Because when they took him out they like put

17:24

him on my chest , like with the umbilical cords

17:26

, the little attach I didn't have last time . So

17:28

that was . That was a nice different experience

17:31

.

17:31

Yeah , he was like ready to go . He's like I got this

17:33

mom , don't worry about it .

17:34

Wow . So yeah , it was like literally an hour from

17:37

my first contraction till he was born

17:39

.

17:39

So sometimes I ask people this I

17:41

have certain descriptors , because people always

17:44

ask me what it feels like when

17:46

you feel that pressure or when some people

17:48

ask me at what point do I recommend the epidural

17:50

? So what does it feel like when I recommend the

17:52

epidural , but you've actually done it without

17:55

an epidural ? Do you have any descriptors for that

17:57

pain or is it just your brain just checked out and

17:59

when the contractions first started

18:01

it felt like really bad , almost GI

18:03

pain .

18:04

Like I was going to have diarrhea that kind of pain . So

18:07

I was actually on the toilet before we left but I was like

18:09

, oh , this is just birth , this is not like

18:11

anything else happening , and then just

18:13

turned up to a hundred . I guess

18:15

, from there and then , like delivery

18:18

pain . I just can't

18:20

think of what to compare . Yeah , just

18:22

really , just like primal Sharp , and

18:25

I don't know if I would have survived

18:27

if it wasn't so fast but , I'm

18:29

grateful for that , yeah .

18:30

I feel like . So when I'm trying to tell people

18:32

when to get the epidural , I usually say

18:35

we've all had diarrhea or not just

18:37

diarrhea , like specifically very intense food poisoning

18:39

pain , yeah . So if you get to that point

18:41

where you're like , oh my gosh , I'm going to birth an alien

18:43

, maybe that

18:46

might be a good time to really consider

18:49

the epidural if you don't have one already . The

18:51

other thing is the pain that most people

18:53

find intolerable is

18:55

when the pressure feels like if you've

18:57

ever stubbed your toe or had somebody

18:59

run over your toe with a heavy object

19:01

. That's the kind of pain that I they

19:04

say pressure , but really

19:06

it's like that deep bone pain almost

19:08

, Because what it is is your baby's head pushing

19:11

on your pelvic bones and

19:14

the soft tissue in between . So

19:16

that's what I mean . Yes , you can get through it without

19:18

pain medication and

19:20

theoretically , if everything's

19:22

going well , it's not pain that

19:25

signals a pathophysiological process

19:27

. It's a natural process . It's

19:29

not injury necessarily

19:31

. So that's where , like some of those classes

19:34

like hypnobirthing and mindset

19:36

classes , come in , where it's just like , if you

19:38

think about the fact that this is not a

19:41

pathophysiological process , it's not indicating

19:43

that something is wrong .

21:28

It's natural physiology . It's

21:31

not even food poisoning Like food poisoning is

21:33

more unnatural than

21:37

the birthing process . So if that

21:39

, if you can wrap your mind around that , then all that

21:41

pressure and however you

21:43

have to visualize it technically

21:45

is normal . So if you can flip that switch

21:47

in your head and think , oh , this is a natural

21:50

process , as I can get through that , then

21:52

you might be a person that can plan

21:54

for a natural birth . Now , you did not have a

21:56

choice .

21:58

No , and that's the thing I'm like . Oh man

22:00

, I wish I had not , that I can't

22:02

expect how it's going to go , but I was like I wish I had taken

22:04

some class to be more prepared for

22:07

natural childbirth

22:09

or childbirth without medication

22:11

and if I ever get pregnant

22:13

again , which the plan right now is not- to but

22:16

it shouldn't ever happen . I think I would have

22:18

to do that or I'm going to have to live outside

22:20

of the hospital for like the last two weeks of

22:22

my pregnancy .

22:24

Yeah , or both , probably both , or just have

22:26

somebody that can come to your house and catch your baby

22:28

.

22:29

You know , you could also call an ambulance .

22:31

That's another option . Sometimes

22:35

we forget that .

22:37

Yes .

22:38

That's so crazy For your postpartum

22:40

experience . What was that like ?

22:42

It was the postpartum , I think was even

22:44

better with Ruben , and I don't know if that's because

22:47

I didn't have the apesiatomy

22:49

or what , but I felt like I

22:51

healed more quickly . So

22:54

he was born October 24th and

22:56

I remember like a week later was

22:58

Halloween and I was like out

23:01

at our neighbor's house with

23:03

my daughter Not that I was like out long

23:05

, but I was up and around and doing

23:07

things , being social . So as far as recovery

23:10

, I feel like it was it was better and I don't know

23:12

if that's just generally how it goes with like

23:14

a more natural tear , but they definitely

23:16

had to like stitch me up after . So that was interesting

23:18

too , because I had to get medicated Novocaine

23:21

at that point and I was like

23:23

, oh , this is different , but that was good

23:25

. And then with him , I tried

23:27

to have him breastfeed at the hospital

23:30

and didn't latch well

23:32

, had another cut and like bruise on my

23:34

nipple at the hospital and I was just like you know what

23:36

, I'm not doing this , I'm not going to do it . So

23:39

I was like you just ripped out of my body

23:41

like a bat out of hell and you know

23:43

what I'm just I'm not going to breastfeed you . And it

23:45

was like so freeing to me in that moment

23:47

to be like , no , I'm just going to feed

23:49

him formula or I'll pump and feed him

23:52

from a bottle , but he's going to be fine . And

23:54

I'm just doing that for myself , just knowing

23:56

how hard breastfeeding was the first

23:58

time and that that was really the

24:00

emotional downside for me was breastfeeding

24:03

. That's when I was crying or just feeling

24:05

like I was a bad mom . It was all related to the

24:07

breastfeeding aspect . So I just decided

24:09

, nope , I'm not going to do this . I did pump for

24:12

maybe like three weeks and I didn't get

24:14

a lot . My supply was not great , just like the

24:16

time before . But he got some breast

24:18

milk to start and then

24:20

, yeah , we just did formula .

24:22

Did you have to do the new Tremogen again or did

24:24

he have any issues ? We did

24:26

.

24:27

We had tons of GI issues with him too

24:29

. He was really gassy and then he

24:32

also did have some blood in his stool . We went

24:34

through like six or seven different

24:36

kinds of formula with him , just trying

24:38

all these different things . It didn't really

24:40

work or it didn't help the gassiness

24:43

that he was experiencing . So we

24:45

did like gentlies

24:47

and a few others that

24:50

were specifically for gas

24:52

. Then we tried new Tremogen

24:55

. That didn't really help . We were seeing a pediatric

24:57

GI so he recommended that

24:59

we tried . What did he say ? Oh

25:01

, we also tried new Tremogen , like in the

25:04

liquid form , like the pre-prepped

25:06

kind . He was like try that . So there's something

25:08

about different formulations of

25:10

the dry versus the liquid form

25:12

. Tried everything we actually . And

25:14

then he was having silent reflux . So

25:17

he would take an ounce or

25:19

two of milk and then reflux

25:22

Like we wouldn't hear anything or

25:24

like it wouldn't come out , but then he would just start

25:26

crying and he would refuse to take any more from

25:28

the bottle . So we

25:30

got all the way up to EllaCare , which

25:32

is prescription formula . They

25:35

have to like specifically order it and send

25:37

it to your house . And then

25:39

we tried that and that made the reflux

25:41

worse . He was on medication

25:43

, a protein , a PPI

25:45

I'm going to forget what that stands for . Proton pump inhibitor

25:48

yes , thank you , he

25:50

was on one of those . Didn't really seem to help

25:52

. And then a friend of mine , her daughter

25:54

, had been on soy formula and

25:57

she was like , just try soy . The doctors

25:59

, the patricians , were saying don't do soy , because

26:02

a certain percentage of kids who

26:04

have milk protein intolerance also have soy

26:06

protein intolerance . But it just got so bad

26:08

I felt so that

26:10

was a point that I felt really low as mom

26:12

, cause I was like all my baby has to do

26:15

right now is eat and grow and

26:17

he can't even do that . And we're we're trying everything

26:19

and we're not finding the solution . So I was just

26:21

kind of like nothing can be worse than it is right

26:23

now . So we tried soy

26:25

and it was like a switch flip

26:27

. He was great . We took him

26:29

off the PPI , he was fine

26:32

, didn't sound reflux , and so he was on soy

26:34

formula for his whole first year

26:36

or from like three months . It

26:38

took us a while to get there , but from three months till

26:41

one he was on soy formula

26:43

.

26:43

Do they still have the milk protein

26:45

allergy ?

26:46

So we tried Millie's good . She drinks 2%

26:48

milk . Now she had no problem transitioning when

26:50

she was one . Ruben , we tried to

26:52

transition to whole milk when

26:55

he was one , but then he was getting constipated

26:57

. So we did soy

26:59

milk for a little while and then our patrician

27:01

recommended oh , milk , so that's what he's

27:03

drinking now . So after

27:05

I had Ruben so if he

27:08

had his milk protein issues , he also

27:10

wasn't sleeping well , which

27:12

was probably related . But

27:15

about when he was like two months we were still

27:17

lucky to get a three hour stretch

27:19

of sleep . That was a long time and

27:21

we had Millie who was two and we were

27:24

losing our minds a little bit so we

27:26

wanted to try to hire a night nurse for a

27:28

few nights to try and regain some sanity

27:30

. So of course , you're in

27:32

the newborn haze and you were on

27:34

Google just like night nurse Ann

27:36

and Dale help us . And it just

27:39

felt weird to be looking for

27:41

that position on Google , like the

27:43

big wide internet , because that person's

27:45

in your home with your newborn while

27:47

you're sleeping . Nothing vulnerable about

27:49

that ? No , not at all , not intimate

27:52

or anything . So , yeah , I was like this feels

27:54

strange to be finding this person on Google , so

27:56

I just kind of wondered why there wasn't a place parents

27:59

could go and know the providers

28:01

were local and trusted

28:04

.

28:04

Yes .

28:05

And you know that someone another

28:07

family has used and had a positive experience

28:10

with . Because I feel like as parents and moms

28:12

, if another mom says to you , oh

28:14

I used this nanny , like you're going

28:16

to work with your neighbors to set them up with your

28:18

nanny , our nanny is great , I feel like as a

28:20

parent that's like all you need to take

28:23

that first step at least to engage

28:25

with that provider and be like let me check them

28:27

out , so kind of having that built in

28:29

to the providers we have and built

28:31

into that network . So I just kind of wondered why that wasn't

28:33

there . And then another

28:35

part of our website is the service

28:38

registry . So for parents

28:40

who are expecting , they can register for

28:42

services like a night nurse

28:44

or a doula or a lactation consultant

28:47

. And that part of the

28:49

business kind of came from a previous experience

28:51

. So a year before

28:53

my husband and I got engaged and then a month

28:56

later bought our first home . So

28:58

while we were registering

29:00

for our wedding , registering for like China

29:03

, which I was like I don't really care about really nice

29:05

plates , like I'd rather have someone

29:07

like a home cleaning service , can someone

29:09

come and help us clean our home once a month

29:12

. So I was like how do I register for that

29:14

? And at that time I just wasn't aware of any

29:16

avenue to do that no-transcript

29:20

. Back then that was 2015

29:23

, I think I was like , oh , I had an idea

29:25

I was going to call it carefree registry

29:27

, where you could register for services for

29:29

all different things . But then

29:31

of course , life happens , we got married . I

29:34

was pregnant like three months later . Then

29:37

I didn't do anything with it . So kind of marrying

29:40

those two ideas of that

29:42

trusted directory and then also

29:45

a way to register for services .

29:47

Nice . I really love that idea Again

29:50

. Wish I'd had it when

29:53

I needed it .

29:54

I wish I had the registry because I'm like

29:56

I would have registered for all these services , like

29:58

chiropractic care I mean

30:00

, in so many things I didn't learn about either until

30:03

building Baby Cito . I didn't

30:05

know , right yeah .

30:08

Well , and I think that is a huge thing that I love , because honestly

30:10

, I mean , with my daughter I was in New

30:12

York and I was just kind of in no man's land . I

30:14

had a couple of friends that had had babies recently

30:16

and they were like , oh , reach out to these people

30:19

. And I did , and it was good , but

30:21

I could have used a lot more support . And then so when

30:23

I got here , it took me like a year

30:25

to get in with the

30:27

moms group that I'm in now . That , I feel

30:29

like , is where I've gotten most of my referrals

30:32

, but still it's piecemeal

30:34

, because if someone is out there talking

30:36

about something , then that's how I

30:38

learned that it exists , whereas if I had

30:40

one place to go where you could see what

30:42

all the service providers are and what all the

30:44

categories are , then I

30:47

feel like I would have probably been a little

30:49

bit more receptive to taking advantage

30:51

of that , or at least known that it was there and known that

30:53

it was an option , so that if I even get to

30:55

that point that I need it , then I know who to

30:57

reach out to , especially like with lactation

31:00

and stuff . I mean , again , I'm a nurse

31:02

, so I had friends that were able to

31:04

text me , so

31:07

like I would be texting the lactation consultants

31:09

that I work with , but also they

31:12

would slowly start saying , hey , if you

31:14

wanted this additional help or if you

31:16

wanted to do the weigh-ins or anything like that , you could

31:18

probably go to an Arlington lactation

31:20

was definitely one that they would recommend

31:23

. So it was just very , very

31:25

disorganized . The way that I

31:27

was able to finally start

31:29

having a support system that I built

31:31

around me and I feel like most moms feel

31:33

the same way- yeah , totally , and I feel

31:35

like , especially in this area

31:37

, it's a little more transient , so people

31:40

don't necessarily have their family and

31:42

friend networks close by .

31:44

And , yeah , if you haven't found that moms group yet

31:46

, or like I was the first one of

31:48

my friends in this area to have a

31:50

kid , so it's not like my closest

31:53

friends had gone through these experiences

31:55

and could give me some advice , so

31:57

, yeah , being able to have that in one place . We also

31:59

have a free service guide

32:02

, so for people who are expecting , they can download

32:04

and it kind of walks them through what services

32:06

they might want to take advantage of and when . It

32:09

also has a glossary so you can like see

32:11

the definition of what different things are

32:13

. But , yeah , education is a big piece of it

32:16

. I was a teacher in FCPS

32:18

for 10 years , so I think that's just part of

32:20

my core and who I am

32:22

, but helping educate parents

32:24

so that they know what's out there Should

32:27

you run into an issue or need support . Just

32:29

helping parents navigate that more

32:31

easily and knowing that there is support you can

32:33

get , especially if you know ahead of

32:35

time , it's more helpful .

32:37

Yeah , definitely . I love the registry . I'm

32:40

kind of stuck on that very envious , because

32:44

, honestly , how many ones do you need ?

32:46

Well , I think that's a thing and one of our dream

32:48

visions is that we will

32:50

help in the future kind of shift

32:53

the culture of gift giving , especially

32:55

for baby showers , so that my dream

32:57

vision is that everyone has a registry for things

32:59

because , especially with your first , you need things for sure

33:01

, but that you also have a registry for

33:03

services , because you don't need 30

33:06

, zero to three month size onesies

33:08

it's going to be fine , you can wash them

33:10

and you do need a lactation consultant

33:13

or a babysitter or

33:15

a night nurse , someone who's going to give you the support

33:17

to help you maintain your sanity and kind of

33:20

navigate that really emotional

33:22

and challenging postpartum period

33:24

.

33:24

Yeah , or therapy . That was another big one

33:26

. It was insurance didn't cover that . If you're

33:29

not sleeping . I mean , I guess if you have to choose

33:31

between therapy and sleep , I know you're going to choose , but

33:33

sometimes having somebody to talk to

33:35

is a good thing .

33:36

Yes , yeah , we have that . That's like

33:38

. One of our categories is mental health

33:41

. That's something that I definitely

33:43

want to encourage all moms to check

33:45

out , all birthing people to check out , and then also

33:47

let them inform their partners that it's

33:49

there , just in case you get to that

33:51

point . I think if you're in a place where you're

33:53

experiencing any postpartum

33:55

depression or anxiety or mood disorder

33:58

, it's harder to

34:00

help yourself and find the help you need

34:02

. So if you and

34:04

or your partner know , oh , there's this resource

34:06

and I can go find one , even better

34:08

if you can kind of like find it before and be like

34:10

, oh , if this happens , this

34:13

person accepts my insurance or is close

34:15

by or offers virtual care , so

34:17

I can just kind of connect with them and set

34:19

something up . That's amazing .

34:21

Well , Lindsay , was there anything else that we didn't cover that you

34:23

wanted to share ?

34:24

No , I don't think so . I mean , I think , just

34:26

want to make sure all

34:28

birthing persons parents know

34:31

that we are here to help

34:33

. Baby Cito is here to help . We are just

34:35

in Northern Virginia right now as far as the providers

34:38

but the service registry anyone anywhere

34:40

can use , because you can create your own

34:42

services to add , and we just

34:44

want to encourage people to reach out to us if

34:47

they need any support , and we'd be happy

34:49

to help help families find

34:51

what they need , whether that's a doula , a lactation

34:53

console and , like we've been talking about , or even something

34:55

like a soccer focused

34:58

summer camp . We can help with that

35:00

as well , because the services you need

35:02

don't stop when your kids won . They

35:04

just change .

35:04

Yeah , absolutely , and it's babycitoco

35:08

co . Yes , all right . Well

35:10

, thank you so much for joining me . I'm really

35:12

excited for this episode and

35:14

I love the . I love

35:16

Baby Cito , I love the events . I'm just

35:18

excited to be able to be a part of it

35:20

.

35:20

Great . I'm so happy to have you as part of

35:22

it too , and thank you for having me on Kelly

35:24

.

35:25

Thank you

35:27

.