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come back to bite you in your

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boo boo, baby. ["Boom

2:32

Boom Boom Boom"] On this

2:35

episode of the Commercial Break.

2:38

She's at the most expensive restaurant,

2:40

the most expensive hotel, flying in

2:42

the first dish of classes. She's

2:44

doing all this stuff, but she

2:46

posts it with all of these

2:48

naked, like humble brags, right? Right,

2:50

so grateful for all my

2:52

beautiful friends while she's drinking champagne

2:54

in like her, a

2:56

private plane, you know? So grateful for all

2:59

the wonderful people around me. You

3:01

know, God is good. Look at

3:03

what he does for your life. You know,

3:06

I am blessed with beauty beyond skin

3:08

deep. The

3:11

next episode of the Commercial Break

3:13

starts now. It's

3:16

30 in the morning! Oh yeah,

3:18

Catholic kittens, welcome back to the Commercial

3:20

Break. I'm Brian Green, this is the bingo to

3:22

my bluey, Christen Joy, only best to you, Christen.

3:24

Best to you, Brian. And best to you out

3:26

there in the podcast universe. Okay, let's talk about

3:29

it. Because I have resisted for years talking about

3:31

this. Well, I think I've mentioned it once or

3:33

twice, but not in depth, and now we're just

3:35

gonna lay all the cards out on the table.

3:37

As a guy who has 40 to 60 children,

3:42

and all of them small, I have

3:44

to talk about flu-y. Because I

3:46

think now it has broken the

3:48

children lexicon and is now in the general,

3:50

I don't

3:52

know, mind-think of

3:54

humanity, especially here in

3:57

the United States. If you are dead,

4:00

Living under a rock or taking a cold

4:02

plunge than you are not what I'm taught,

4:04

not not what I'm not know what I'm

4:06

talking about. Otherwise you must know. That.

4:09

There's a show called Bluey and it is

4:11

for children and it runs on Disney Junior

4:13

and sometimes a Disney Channel. Check your local

4:15

listings. And

4:18

the show has taken the world

4:20

by storm. Prissy, It has taken

4:22

the world by storm and with

4:24

good goddamn reason. And now

4:26

I'm going to share with you

4:28

that I do not care if

4:30

you are an adult or child

4:32

or an adult. With a child

4:35

or children, you Must Watch The

4:37

show Blue Blue He is an

4:39

amazing cartoon created by an Australian

4:41

animator. Yeah, it's been around for awhile rise.

4:43

Been around for about five or six

4:45

years. I'd never were only on. like

4:47

season number four, five, something like that

4:49

in their ten minute episodes and they

4:51

run back to back usually so you

4:53

know, Yet one and than commercial break.

4:56

and then the second one and my

4:58

children started watching this. My oldest child

5:00

started watching this at the Up five

5:02

or six years ago when it came

5:04

on and I thought oh, that's cute,

5:06

it's It's based on what let me

5:08

say. The characters. The characters are Bingo

5:10

and Bluey the two girls that live

5:12

with their parents in Australia banned. It

5:14

and silly. They are also Australian.

5:17

Shepherds is what they are offering.

5:19

Sheppard. Oh dogs. Okay, in every

5:21

a creature in their world generally

5:23

is a dog right? but they

5:25

talking all that. So

5:27

blue he is. This young girl know really holds

5:29

his. I think she said in the show she

5:32

grows as the show goes. I think she's like

5:34

three, four, five, six, and seven. And

5:37

her younger sister. and the world

5:39

that they like the world through

5:42

their eyes and through the eyes

5:44

of their very interactive parents, the

5:46

parents. Bandits. And kill

5:48

him. So let me give you an

5:51

example of an episode of Blue. It's

5:53

a rainy day outside. The girls are

5:55

upset because they can't go to play

5:57

outside or whatever. So banned it decides.

5:59

Okay. Make a fort will make

6:01

you guys a little for a celebrity

6:04

them when Alexander wouldn't say. I'm a

6:06

writer and I think this is what blue. He

6:08

gets so Rights is hyper realistic

6:10

in the sense that a few

6:12

you know you can remember. Being

6:14

this young you can remember doing

6:16

the things that. That. These parents

6:18

are doing for their children. As a child

6:20

it's A. It's a snapshot of a moment

6:23

in times. But what blue he really gets.

6:25

So. Wonderfully correct is that they

6:27

do it from the eyes of the

6:29

children a lotta times but the parents

6:31

are are pulled in their engrossed in

6:34

it's so instead of having afford with

6:36

a couple of blankets on top you

6:38

know with some toys inside all the

6:40

sudden it becomes a mall or us

6:42

Suge house and then they just come

6:44

in. they just kind of go into

6:46

this worry imagine a the imagination. But.

6:49

The lessons that the parents

6:51

and the children learn along the

6:53

way or real they are sometimes

6:55

sensitive topics of her around death

6:58

or friendships or caring for

7:00

others whatever it happens to

7:02

be. They. Do

7:04

it in a way that it's

7:06

hard as a parent not to

7:09

get engrossed. In the

7:11

lesson because the way that they're telling it.

7:13

You. Remember it as a child and then you

7:15

see it as an adult and you're like

7:17

holy Shit. Dig digs her

7:20

heart all warm and does. That fuzzy.

7:23

I. Am going to admit like a

7:25

lot of people are Instagram right now

7:27

blue He has brought me to tears

7:29

on many occasions because sometimes the lessons

7:31

or so help heartfelt and and. Story

7:34

told: So beautiful, ease and so

7:36

touching me that you can't help.

7:39

But. Just like. Break. Down like a

7:41

little less a little shy off of it is

7:43

reaching your inner child and in a way

7:45

that is entertaining to in adults. And

7:47

I'm going to share this with you now. I

7:49

don't know. I think it was months back when

7:52

we are in A when you were taken a

7:54

break, you had family issues and everybody was going

7:56

through things. I got a book for my kid

7:58

based on a blurry episodes. Ah, and. The filled

8:00

with this bluey. The. The

8:02

girl that the show is based on

8:05

goes to a camp ground like or

8:07

they have a trailer. you know and

8:09

it's this. Everything is in Australia, the

8:11

accents or Australian. So they're out in

8:14

the Outback somewhere and they're in this

8:16

camp sites and blue he meets another.

8:19

Dog. Another child essential Assange Olympia

8:21

a little for a little friend. Jean

8:24

Pierre, his friends and he doesn't become

8:26

speak a lick of English and Blue

8:28

doesn't speak a lick of French. but

8:30

somehow through the magic of imagination, play

8:32

and friendship the international language of. Play.

8:36

They. Connect. And they

8:38

see they build a friendship over a couple of

8:40

days. One of the things that they do when

8:42

they're playing around the creeks and you know exploring

8:44

through the that, the trees and the alpaca. most

8:47

of the stuff. they find a seed for a

8:49

treat and they plant the seed in they water.

8:51

they're pretending that they're doing something and it's a

8:53

very short little montage and you catch this little

8:56

thing of them planting the tree and then a

8:58

couple of days later inside of the episodes blue

9:00

he wakes up to go outside and fine Jean

9:02

Luc er Som Vi or whatever his name is

9:04

and he's gone because he left his vacation with

9:07

over. But because he didn't speak the

9:09

language he didn't He couldn't tell Bluey goodbye.

9:11

yeah, really didn't understand that he was saying

9:13

i'm leaving goodbyes as a when he woke

9:15

up use she was very upset, she was

9:17

upset and mom came and said a few

9:20

very beautiful words and explain to Bluey that's

9:22

this is how life is. Sometimes we have

9:24

a short period of time with people, sometimes

9:26

we have a longer per. I'm not going

9:29

to get choked up just talking about it.

9:31

Sometimes we have a longer period of time

9:33

with people. But what really matters is that

9:35

always be right here on our hung. In

9:37

that moment in time will always stay

9:40

with us, right? and it'll grow. And

9:42

you'll grow because of your time with

9:44

this person or this dog haven't seen

9:46

and so blue he said cries. You

9:49

know, walks around the camp grounds. and

9:52

then they show this beautiful scene at

9:54

the end where blue he sits by

9:56

the tree that they planted as the

9:58

tree grows so does blue we and

10:00

the music behind it, if the music is

10:02

so wonderful, Chrissy, I just wept. I was

10:04

reading this book to my child and I

10:06

couldn't get through it. I was crying and

10:09

my kid's like, why are you crying, daddy?

10:11

And I'm like, because it's so beautiful. And

10:13

he's like, bluey? And I'm like, no, no,

10:15

no, no, the whole lesson. And he's like,

10:17

what's the lesson? And

10:20

I'm like, you know the lesson, right, dude?

10:22

And he's like, yeah, don't go to the

10:24

campground because your people are gonna leave you.

10:28

I'm like, no, not really, but okay. That's

10:30

true too, never go camping. Parties

10:34

in the woods always end up in

10:36

tears. That's what, that's what, that's what,

10:38

that's what. See,

10:43

you knew the real lesson. Chrissy,

10:45

I wept like a child. Then I saw the actual episode

10:48

that it was based on and I cried

10:50

even more. I

10:52

actually killed my therapist. It's a really

10:54

sweet, cute show. I know my nephews

10:56

used to watch it too and it

10:59

was very sweet. So why is everybody talking

11:01

about bluey now? Yeah, it's all over my

11:03

news feed. So why is the Instagram, TikTok,

11:05

everyone, by the way, I just learned and

11:07

I wanna make sure that

11:09

I'm saying this correctly, but bluey

11:12

is the second most

11:14

streamed television show in

11:17

history, in history with like billions of

11:19

minutes streamed. So that Disney plus, they

11:21

got a real incentive to keep this

11:23

going. But why everybody is talking about

11:25

it now over the last couple of

11:27

weeks is because bluey came back with

11:30

a new episode and the season finale

11:32

was a 28 minute episode, which

11:34

first of all is unlike any other bluey episode because they're

11:37

all 10 minutes long. Right,

11:39

it's like the Sopranos. It's like

11:41

the Sopranos, yeah. And everyone's getting

11:43

upset because they think it's

11:46

ending because bluey in this episode,

11:48

there's a wedding or something like that. And then

11:50

I actually haven't seen the whole episode. I just

11:52

watched bits and pieces while I've been with my

11:54

kids watching it. But there is the

11:57

final scene or the final storyline.

12:00

is that Bluey and the family are going

12:02

to move from this magical house that has

12:04

been the base, like the home base for

12:07

all of this wonderfulness throughout the

12:09

years. And Bandit's gonna

12:11

sell the house, they're going to move,

12:13

you know, whatever. And the kids are

12:15

really getting upset. So in the end,

12:18

spoiler alert, in the end, spoiler

12:20

alert on a child's cartoon. I know, I was gonna watch this.

12:23

Okay, spoiler alert, they don't end

12:25

up moving, but

12:28

a lot of people suspect that this

12:30

is the creator's way of soft finale-ing

12:32

the show. And he has explained that

12:34

he has a daughter and that that

12:37

daughter has been the basis for all

12:39

of these episodes, largely, his interactions with

12:41

his daughter. And if you could be

12:44

one-tenth the parent that Bandit or Chili

12:46

were to their kids, you are a

12:48

fucking superhero because Bandit is like, it doesn't

12:50

matter what's going on, Bandit is always up

12:53

for some playtime. And I

12:55

just love it. I

12:57

think we all wish we had a dad exactly

12:59

like Bandit. So people

13:02

think that the creator, and he said

13:04

out loud, I don't know how much

13:06

longer I can tell these stories because

13:08

they come from a place of

13:10

honesty and transparency into my own

13:13

parenting and my own childhood.

13:15

But as my children age out of the

13:18

Bluey age, what do I do next? Do

13:20

I grow with them? Does Bluey grow with

13:22

them? Or he's afraid, essentially,

13:24

I think, of jumping the shark. He's afraid of just

13:26

keep on doing it till it dies, until he pounds

13:28

it in the ground. I think just

13:30

like the Sopranos, he wants to go out on

13:33

top. And you can hardly blame the

13:35

guy. I mean, this

13:37

little Australian show that no one

13:39

even cared the two shits about

13:41

all of a sudden became this

13:43

super rock star hit and

13:46

everyone's talking about it. I can understand that there's a

13:48

lot of pressure and he doesn't want to repeat himself

13:50

and he doesn't want to make the stories like Dumber

13:52

and dumb down. And so,

13:54

how many lessons? Yeah, content. Exactly. He doesn't

13:56

want to be like the commercial break and beat

13:59

it in the head. to the ground

14:01

with four episodes every three minutes. So

14:07

I'm just really taken with this

14:09

show and I'm seeing all this

14:11

stuff on Instagram and TikTok about

14:13

Bluey and it's not the children

14:15

that are talking about it, it's the fucking adults

14:17

that are having watch parties, they're crying together, they're

14:20

going to their therapist over it. I

14:22

mean it's insane. I don't think I've ever seen

14:24

a show, especially not a children's show, affect

14:27

the general population like this.

14:29

It's really quite amazing and

14:32

I encourage you, I

14:34

guess of the point of my whole rant here,

14:36

is not rant, just sharing how beautiful this show

14:38

is. I guess my point in discussing this is

14:40

that it doesn't matter if you have children or

14:42

not, you should be watching Bluey. From

14:44

the beginning, episode number one, there's like I don't know

14:47

70s, 80, 90 episodes now, you

14:49

should, they're 10 minutes long. Can you spare 10 minutes

14:51

a day? Can you spare 10 minutes a day to

14:54

become a better human being by watching a show about

14:56

Australian German shepherds in the outback, teasing

14:58

their children a little long? Yeah,

15:01

it probably would be the serial

15:03

killer murder show I was watching

15:05

yesterday. Yes, Chrissy. So

15:08

I'll turn that on instead. As Nia Brennan

15:10

said, women make such great television choices

15:12

as they're going to bed. I

15:14

know. I'm a screw-trying shit. I

15:17

mean I should be one to talk. I'm

15:20

searching out BBC comedies. I'm now

15:22

like back in the 80s watching dumb comedies,

15:24

but I should probably be watching more Bluey.

15:27

Yeah, there you go. I encourage you. Take your

15:29

advice. Do you watch it with the boys? Yes,

15:31

I have watched it before. It's super cute.

15:33

Yeah, I don't think it's super cute. I think

15:35

it's super important. It's super important is what it

15:38

is. It's a show whose time has come. We

15:40

all need a little bandit in our life. That's what I have

15:42

to say. I think we need to get that bandit. I

15:46

bandit for president. Hey, if

15:48

bandit was for president, I'm going to write in bandit for president.

15:50

That's what I'm going to do this time. Yeah,

15:52

that's a good choice. Should I start a campaign?

15:55

We should start a campaign. Bandit for president. our

16:00

president I think things would be a lot better

16:02

yeah this seems like a better I don't know

16:04

he seems like it'd be better at making decisions

16:06

and some of the other choices that we have

16:10

I was watching this guy on Instagram and

16:13

he's like what do you think he's

16:15

like comes on you

16:17

know laying on a couch he's like cheer

16:19

streaming down his face fuck you bluey and

16:21

I was like oh I gotta watch this

16:24

and he explains he turns the camera around

16:26

these all these moving boxes and he explains

16:28

that his family is going through the exact

16:31

same thing that bluey and his family were

16:33

going through also which is their home a

16:36

move and he's like I felt

16:38

so awesome about the storyline

16:40

when the show started because I thought this

16:42

is a great way to have the children

16:45

make a soft landing around the fact we

16:47

have to move from their childhood home but

16:50

at the end the last seven minutes as they

16:52

decide they're just not going to move he's like

16:54

that's one

16:57

of the scenes is like blue he's trying to

16:59

pull the for sale so I mean Chrissy

17:03

like the guy is like he's crying

17:05

he's explaining it took two and a half

17:07

hours to put the children to bed because

17:09

you couldn't understand why they could just not

17:11

move either like why can't

17:13

they pull the for sale sign after the

17:15

front yard and not move and the guy's

17:17

like does bluey or band does band and

17:20

not understand finances or reality or jobs or

17:22

you know it's a cartoon dude I know

17:24

I mean

17:27

there's a lesson there too not everything is a

17:29

story you know not everything is a fairy tale

17:31

actually most things are not a fairy tale just

17:33

when you think everything's okay is when things blow

17:36

up just ask the guys and

17:38

girls from the commercial break we'll

17:40

let you know speaking

17:44

of storytellers I wanted to share this with you I read

17:47

an excellent article I think it's still up at

17:50

vulture calm vulture reviewed

17:52

Kyle canain's latest special

17:54

which 800 pound

17:56

gorilla channel on YouTube yeah I'm called

17:58

dirt nap they They reviewed it and man

18:01

did they give it like an excellent review and one

18:03

of the things they shared is long live the long

18:05

joke. And

18:07

I kind of summarize that by saying long live

18:09

the storyteller because the storyteller who can really get

18:11

into it and do it correctly are some of

18:14

the funniest people out there. Chris Rock was a

18:16

storyteller, some of these comedians and if you go

18:18

watch his special, you'll see that he's really good

18:20

at weaving a tail. It takes all kind of

18:22

twists and turns. He

18:25

ends up back at a punch line but he's

18:27

so good at that. He's so good at just

18:29

like taking 20 minutes

18:31

and weaving something together and

18:34

I appreciate it. I

18:36

enjoyed getting to know him at least for an hour

18:38

the other day. Did you text him? I

18:40

did not text him. Yes. No, did

18:42

not. But you got a text that

18:44

you thought was from him. I thought I got an

18:46

email. They have to save

18:48

me. They were like, look at that.

18:51

So kylecanaim.com is where you can get

18:53

tickets to his shows. I encourage you

18:55

to go watch the special Dirt Nap

18:58

on 800-pound gorilla, the YouTube channel. There's

19:00

a lot of great other comedians that have done 800-pound gorilla.

19:02

Yeah, I didn't really know about that channel. I thought that

19:04

Matt Rife did one. I don't know the first thing about

19:07

Matt Rife, do you? No. I don't

19:09

know. Everyone's all... Either you love

19:11

him or hate him apparently. Why do people love him or hate

19:13

him? Well I think

19:15

the girls love him because he's got good looks. I

19:17

think the guys didn't really get

19:19

into it until... I mean, I don't

19:22

know. Who knows? I

19:25

don't want to pretend that I know. I don't know. He's

19:27

a handsome guy and then there's other people that are

19:29

saying he's not talented. People just like him because he's

19:31

good looking. But I think he's been doing this for...

19:34

Even though he's young, I think he's been doing it

19:36

for most of his mature life. And

19:39

some people don't like his new flick special. But you know what?

19:42

I don't give a shit. Some people don't... Watch

19:45

Bluey. That's what I have to say. Just go

19:47

back to Bluey. If you don't like

19:49

Matt Rife, you can lick your

19:51

fucking paws and watch Bluey. Bluey,

19:53

bingo, bandit, chili. Remember that. Because

19:55

when the aliens come down... 50,000

19:59

years. years from now. We have

20:01

long since perished and they're digging around

20:03

the sand trying to find remnants of

20:05

what our world was like in 2024, which I'm

20:07

sure is the last year we're going

20:09

to be here. In 2024, I hope what they

20:11

don't find is my 600-pound life, even though

20:18

I like that show too. I hope what they do

20:20

find is bluey. That's all I got to say. They

20:23

can go, these people were compassionate and kind and they

20:25

loved each other and they taught their children lessons instead

20:28

of, you know, another Big Mac, please.

20:30

What are you going to

20:37

do? Yeah, long

20:40

live bluey. I hope it doesn't end. I think

20:42

he's got one more season in him and

20:46

that's selfishly, I say one more season, but I mean after

20:48

70, 80, 90 episodes, what are

20:50

we on? 550? After 70, 80, 90 episodes, maybe

20:52

he should hang it up. Maybe we

20:55

should take a

20:57

lesson. Maybe that's the lesson for

20:59

us from bluey. Yes, absolutely. All

21:01

right, let's do this. Let's take

21:03

a break and we'll be back

21:05

with less cartoon talk. How's that?

21:07

Okay. All right, we'll be back.

21:12

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21:14

so pull up Instagram and follow us

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21:21

Perfect. Thank you. Since you're at the ready,

21:23

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21:30

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25:57

you remember, I mean you know you remember this. The

26:00

Instagram nipple rule. Yeah,

26:03

I saw something about this. We've

26:06

talked about this many, many times. The

26:08

Instagram nipple rule, which is basically, women

26:11

cannot expose their nipples in any

26:14

kind of way, really. I

26:17

mean, I think they have some exceptions for art and

26:19

stuff like that. But for the most part,

26:21

you can't expose your nipples in any way. They need to

26:23

be covered in some way, shape, or form, I believe is

26:25

the rule. So a lot of people

26:27

on Instagram, women on Instagram, will cover

26:30

them with sheer tops or pieces of

26:32

plastic or stuff that clearly doesn't hide

26:34

the nipple whatsoever. But I

26:36

have now been served up something on

26:38

my personal Instagram account. That

26:40

just blew me away. They have

26:43

a breastfeeding rule. You can

26:45

show breastfeeding. So now

26:47

the hot to trot Instagram

26:50

trend of the day is

26:52

hot girls breastfeeding dolls.

26:56

Breastfeeding fake dolls so that they

26:58

can show their nipples on the

27:00

camera. So there are very beautiful

27:02

women, clearly not real babies. I

27:06

mean, I don't know if they're mothers or not, but

27:08

clearly not real children, putting plastic dolls

27:10

to their bosoms and then pulling

27:12

their tops down. Which

27:15

I thought was just an ingenious way to get around

27:17

this. I mean, I looked

27:19

at one of these accounts, she's got like 357,000 followers, and

27:25

the account does. And it's

27:27

like pro breastfeeding, pro breastfeeding.

27:30

And it's all just Instagram model

27:32

solids with fake dolls to their

27:35

boobs. I'm so confused how people have time

27:37

for this. Well, you know,

27:39

you got 357,000 followers, you're

27:42

probably making some change on this. But

27:44

it's just all leading back to an

27:46

only fans breastfeeding page where I'm

27:48

sure the kind of breastfeeding that mothers do not

27:51

want to watch is going on in

27:53

there. But I mean, wow. Sex

27:56

drives everything on the internet. No,

27:58

of course. Strives all evolution. The

28:00

into so many different ways or that

28:02

a be technology emotionally, spiritually, physically, sex.

28:04

I mean I guess it makes sense

28:07

when you think about it. Felix is

28:09

the purpose. Need is one of the

28:11

thin how wise happens you think. Teach

28:13

me. Would

28:16

you be embarrassed to give your kids? Have

28:19

you ever had to give any children that

28:21

have been in your orbit like the talk

28:23

Now know. Hockey

28:25

you just the one thing I'm afraid of. Our my god

28:27

just don't even know where to start known him for. I

28:30

mean, I'm my children are entirely too young to even start

28:32

thinking about that, but it's like yeah, I just don't even

28:34

know where to. So this is the kind of stuff the

28:36

kids me up at night seen as older than. A

28:38

get a lot of that from outside. Yeah,

28:40

from outside the house that I think you

28:43

need to different. Daddy's browsing. So sorry.

28:45

I guess that southwest. They

28:48

certainly rt know him as a fan

28:51

of we're A Sensor Toyota. Yeah, so.

28:53

Yeah they're gonna see or else and settled on

28:55

I think the the best way to do it

28:57

would says like kind of what my mom did

28:59

with was like if you have any questions please

29:02

come to me and I'll tell you the truth.

29:04

Okay and so yeah. did you have

29:06

questions? I dad, Did you ask her

29:08

identity tell you the truth is if

29:10

I don't like the unvarnished truth, Yeah

29:12

think cel I mean you know facts here

29:14

and and as dating myself have been a

29:17

pre internet as magazines there's lot of magazines

29:19

realize like cause now and stuff like that

29:21

area and say he kind of pick up

29:23

on says there too but yeah i mean

29:26

i guess sound and are not the kids

29:28

are denims is needed as google. and even

29:30

as google has yeah cause more has are going

29:32

are all like. That browsing history of our

29:34

child when time. That said, what is morning

29:36

would. Have

29:39

thought is that I live from the school from

29:41

some boys at school and then it as a

29:43

guy you didn't as google things that the kids

29:45

on and. Ah, good old morning They. Had

29:48

to have the talk actually. Yeah. maybe

29:50

i don't i'm not going to do

29:52

a my parents didn't put down some

29:55

extraordinarily clinical book on facts i have

29:57

a book on like some medical journal

29:59

about sex because that's what they

30:01

did. And I remember I was in the, I

30:03

think I was probably nine, 10 years old. They

30:05

just like flipped it into your room or? Nah,

30:07

we were sitting at the kitchen table. The kitchen

30:09

table. I know, it was so weird. Oh God.

30:12

I think it was so weird. I

30:15

think here's what happened. I'm piecing this together because honestly,

30:17

I think I was a little too young to remember

30:19

every detail of this. I don't think I even had,

30:22

you know, all my memory facilities available to

30:24

me. So I'm guessing this was seven, eight,

30:26

nine years old. They used

30:28

to get National Geographic, the

30:30

magazine. And

30:32

then they had these encyclopedias. We had like

30:34

two different versions of encyclopedias. Yeah, we did

30:36

too. And I started searching out, like, you

30:38

know, the National Geographic, they would go out,

30:40

you know, to Africa or wherever and be

30:42

with the tribes and the tribes were naked,

30:44

right? I mean, the women had no tops

30:46

on and sometimes the men, you know, were

30:48

not wearing any kind of cloth. Yeah, or

30:51

nothing. They just had their penises out like

30:53

that. And I think I started seeking out

30:55

the pictures of the women that were topless.

30:57

And then I think my dad or my

30:59

mom may have caught me like looking at

31:01

the word breasts in the encyclopedia where

31:03

they had real pictures of boobs. And

31:06

so I got very excited about that, probably

31:08

physically and mentally about that. And

31:11

I believe I started asking

31:13

some questions like where do babies come from? How

31:16

do you get made? Yeah, and so my mom

31:18

and dad in their infinite wisdom decided it was

31:20

time to sit an eight year old down, which

31:22

is probably the appropriate time to start having that

31:24

conversation. But at that time, I just remember it

31:26

was weird. And Kevin and I rescinded the kitchen

31:28

table and I will never forget. My dad had

31:30

like a book and like my

31:32

mom opened it up. She's like, remember how you're talking

31:35

about a baby? Oh, and she might've been pregnant with

31:37

one of my brothers. Well, there you go. And I'm really excited

31:40

about a baby and a penis and a vagina and there's semen

31:42

goes up here and the tubular is over here. I

31:44

was like. Whoa.

31:47

I know. And

31:50

also, I think, and I don't

31:52

know this, but I think at that age, you

31:55

start to kind of like become physically

31:57

aware of what's going on. Yeah. masturbating,

32:00

you can't jizz, but you can rub

32:02

up against a door frame or something. You get around.

32:05

Yeah, you can rub up against a door frame,

32:07

it feels good. And so I think that's what

32:09

happened, but I just never forget this weird conversation

32:12

that I don't remember all the details of, but

32:14

there was flipping through books and there were pictures.

32:16

A medical journal. It was a medical journal, and

32:18

there were pictures of weird looking penises and very

32:22

hairy vaginas, and I got scared. I

32:24

was just scared. And I was like,

32:26

ah, nah, I think that's where all

32:29

the being scared of pussy came from. If

32:34

I only had my June popcorn doozy

32:36

that I could have played with back

32:39

then, but they didn't have popcorn doosies

32:41

back then, that June version.

32:44

But I just, you know, I get

32:46

nervous about having this conversation. So

32:48

that's why I had to

32:50

follow a couple of these breastfeeding pages so I can save

32:53

it. Yeah, I got to teach the kids when they get

32:55

older. I got to say, hey kids, check

32:57

out these tits. That is

32:59

some breastfeeding right there, kids. That is

33:02

some breastfeeding. That's how mom grew you, right there, baby.

33:05

Hey, daughter, don't do that. Yeah, oh,

33:07

yeah, the daughter, she's got to be careful.

33:09

Yeah, you're in for a treat. No, I'm

33:11

not. On that. Yeah, I'm pretty

33:13

sure I'm in for payback is what I'm in for.

33:16

I'm in for karma is what I'm in for. You

33:18

can't do anything to pass a certain point.

33:20

And it's just like, well, you're going to

33:22

have to be out there doing that thing.

33:24

I remember getting so upset the first time

33:26

I saw one of ours, you

33:28

know, the stepdaughters with

33:30

a very risque outfit on Instagram.

33:33

It was bikini, you know, like

33:36

one of those, yeah, like one of those super

33:38

thin bikini. Yes, all they're all wearing them. And

33:41

yeah, I was getting very upset. But then you just

33:43

have to kind of roll with it. Yeah,

33:46

I just, I was such a different man

33:48

before I had daughters. I mean, not that

33:50

I was like, you know, drooling over every

33:52

breast I saw, I drooled over most breasts

33:54

I saw, not all of them. But

33:57

the my kick.

34:00

I guess my perspective changed, I guess it

34:02

would with anybody, but my perspective changed. It

34:04

used to be that Astrid and I would go visit

34:06

this beach often, there's a beach that we like to

34:08

go to very often, and we go there

34:11

repeatedly. And then there's a big hotel there, and you

34:13

can go to the pool if you're in this neighborhood.

34:16

So we used to go to this hotel,

34:18

and before even I met Astrid, we'd go

34:20

to this hotel, and there would be the

34:22

women running around in various bikinis, and some

34:24

of them younger, and they're late

34:26

teens, 19, 20, 21,

34:28

22, and you'd look and you'd go, oh,

34:31

that's a good looking woman right there. And now

34:33

I scan for appropriate

34:35

clothing. I'm like, oh no,

34:37

no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

34:39

no, where is your parents? Put

34:41

your ass cheeks back behind cloth,

34:44

please. And Astrid goes,

34:46

you're such an old man, you are such an old

34:48

man, this is what the girls are wearing. And

34:50

I'm like, you tell me that one of my daughters comes,

34:53

and she's wearing that at the pool, and you're gonna be

34:55

okay with it, and she's like, I'm gonna have to be

34:57

okay with it. You have to. Yeah, and she goes, by

34:59

the way, I grew up in Venezuela. Right. They're wearing this

35:01

at like age three. Yeah. She's like,

35:03

this is not a big deal. She's like, Brian,

35:05

you've been to Spain a million times. Like, no

35:07

one wears anything there. And it's just, you shouldn't

35:09

be so ashamed. Part of it, yeah. I said,

35:11

listen, my Catholic guilt is now coming back to

35:13

haunt me. Because I don't have any interest in

35:15

my daughter showing her ass cheeks to

35:17

anyone, period, and to sentence. And

35:22

I'm talking about the weather more, and I'm worrying more

35:24

about what bathing suits my kids are gonna be wearing.

35:27

That's where I'm at in life. That's

35:29

all the sudden where I showed up. I

35:31

woke up one day, all of a sudden,

35:34

I'm concerned. I'm no longer drooling over the

35:36

hot bikinis. I'm trying to cover them up.

35:38

I'm like running around with a hotel pool,

35:40

like, put some clothes on. You're

35:43

setting a bad example for everybody around here. What

35:45

are you doing? Isn't it that kind of establishment? But

35:49

that's, but it is what it is. It is what it

35:51

is. It is what it is. It's

35:54

a hard bit of a jumping

35:57

off of the ledge, but then what do you

35:59

do? you're kind of like okay. Well I know if

36:01

I create a storm that

36:04

I'm just gonna suck them into the storm

36:06

and it's gonna make them be more determined

36:10

to do whatever the fuck they wanna

36:12

do. And I've had

36:14

this conversation. You should be more concerned really about

36:17

the predators that are online that are, you know.

36:19

Oh yeah. Going after. Those

36:21

kids are not gonna have social media accounts. That's the thing that

36:24

we, yeah. Yeah, and first. That's

36:26

the thing that we had to talk to our girls

36:28

about was like okay, you're posting

36:30

these pictures, but look at these reactions,

36:32

look at what some of these comments are

36:34

and you have to be careful. Absolutely. Of

36:36

all of the people that are out there

36:39

and especially people you don't know. I

36:44

am currently building a basement where I can

36:46

lock my children down there. And

36:49

I'm gonna let them all out at age 35.

36:52

And whatever they choose to do at that point

36:54

is theirs. Death or 35. If I

36:56

die, cool. You turn 35, cool. You

36:58

guys can be out in the world and then you

37:00

can have a social media account. But otherwise, hail to

37:03

the no. And then to put these pictures up there,

37:06

I mean, it's just insane to me. It's

37:08

really insane to me. Yeah, you've got a little

37:10

time. I don't have much time,

37:12

Chrissy. It feels like it's slipping away slowly. It's like

37:14

bluey. I'm phasing out. I'm

37:16

phasing out of the, oh, that's

37:18

sweet. Into the, get a, what?

37:21

Get, avert your eyes. Avert

37:23

your eyes, young man. What are you doing? It's

37:27

my daughter. I know I'm gonna be that dad.

37:29

I know I'm gonna be that dad that comes

37:31

in and has a story. And not because I

37:34

feel like I'm extra overprotective. I wanna be extra

37:36

overprotective of my daughters. I don't wanna be a

37:38

helicopter parent. But

37:41

I just, life moves so fast.

37:43

It's hard not to be in some sense.

37:47

It's hard not to be. What can we do? What

37:49

can we do to save our children from

37:51

string bikinis? How do we, how

37:54

do we do this? How

37:57

do we do this? I don't think we can. I

37:59

gotta start putting pictures. pictures around the house. We

38:01

gotta start exposing them to full one piece

38:04

bathing suits with

38:07

the little tennis skirts around it.

38:10

Right, the ones from the 50s. Yeah,

38:13

like a running jacket. That's

38:15

a good August, Florida sun

38:17

kind of look for you.

38:19

I know, I look back sometimes on those

38:21

pictures you could see of the bathing

38:24

suits from those eras and how they were

38:26

so scandalous for them. Yeah. And

38:28

I mean, not at all. Not

38:31

at all. I see dudes. You

38:33

can see her knee. I know. Oh

38:35

my God. Look

38:38

out, it's a knee. Put

38:41

your knee nipples away. I

38:45

go to Publix and

38:48

I see people more scantily clad

38:51

at Publix at eight o'clock at night than you

38:53

ever would in a picture from the 50s or

38:55

60s. It's insane. It's insane. You

38:58

should have seen it. We did swimming the other day. And

39:00

we come out of swimming and there is

39:03

a convertible parked right

39:05

out front in the handicap space

39:07

with no handicap sticker. Yeah, lovely.

39:10

Cops down and there's a lady in there

39:13

and she has these huge sunglasses

39:15

on. She has got, her

39:18

hair is multi-colored and it's

39:21

frizzed out probably three and a half

39:23

feet over her head. This lady is probably in her

39:25

60s by the way. Frizzed out. Frizzed out. You

39:27

can see she has these, I

39:30

don't even know what to call them, like feathers

39:32

taped to her eyebrows. Do you know what I'm

39:34

talking about? No. Like some people, they

39:36

do these little wispy things on their eyebrows. Oh. They're

39:38

like little white wisps. And you can see, White, too.

39:41

She takes off her sunglasses and you can see the, yeah. It's

39:44

a crazy thing. I didn't see that. It's like attached to

39:46

their eyebrows. And it's just these little wisps. It's not the

39:48

fake eyelashes? Oh, she had those too. And they were a

39:50

mile out of her head. And then

39:53

she had this clown makeup on and she had a

39:55

big fur coat. It's 82 degrees in Atlanta right now.

39:57

A fur coat. She had a fur coat on. The

39:59

most. ridiculous multi-colored, looks like it was spray-painted

40:02

fur coat, and she is sitting out there

40:04

and there's some music playing in her car

40:06

and I just was like what in the

40:08

good fuck is going on? It's

40:11

Tuesday afternoon! Where are

40:13

you going? Where are you coming from is

40:15

probably the better question. What is going on

40:18

with people these days? Your Publix is

40:20

quite the place because we've talked about some other

40:22

things. No, this is swimming class. Oh, this is

40:24

swimming class. But it's right across the street from

40:26

a Publix, so there you go. I

40:31

think people are going crazy in the suburbs.

40:33

I think that's what it is. People go

40:35

crazy in the suburbs. Like Kyle said, he

40:37

said, I had no problem adjusting, but he'll

40:39

go crazy. He'll be like

40:42

me someday. He'll just be sitting here talking

40:44

about the weather and crazy people you

40:46

see in Publix. But

40:48

then she stood up and what she

40:50

had on under was like a

40:53

bikini. That's the best way to explain

40:55

it. She had a bikini. Was she

40:57

taking swimming lessons? I don't know. I'm

41:00

pretty sure she would drown because if

41:02

all those eyelashes just pull her straight

41:04

down into the pool. I

41:06

mean she had these huge eyelashes on.

41:09

Huge! It was crazy.

41:11

She had a bikini on under a fur

41:13

coat. I had a bikini under a fur

41:15

coat. Let me see if I can give

41:17

you an example of an

41:21

eyebrow. I wonder

41:23

if that's somebody's crazy aunt that came to

41:25

pick them up from swim class. I

41:28

think that's what it was. I think you're

41:30

right about that. I think it was a

41:32

family member of a family member. Eyebrows extension

41:35

is crazy. Let me see if

41:37

I can even start to try

41:39

and give you a picture of what this looked like. It

41:41

must be white. I have not seen that. Okay,

41:44

so this is what her eyebrows look

41:46

like. Those. Like the crazy eyelashes look

41:48

like. Oh,

41:51

well yeah. I've seen those. Plenty. Those are insane.

41:53

Why would you do that? The kind of

41:55

curl up? Yeah. And

41:58

oh, here's a good example. But

42:00

they were stuck to her eyebrows. Oh, do you see that

42:02

they were like on her eyebrows? It's really but it was

42:04

like they were all white and I

42:06

thought to myself What are you doing on a Tuesday

42:08

afternoon that you have to be dressed like that in

42:10

a bikini with a full fur coat? sandals

42:13

on hair all multi-colored and frizzed out

42:15

and I Want

42:18

to I either want to arrest the

42:20

woman or find out where she lives so I can

42:22

party with her But

42:25

if the 60 year olds are dressing like this, what

42:28

chance do I have with my children I'm not Let

42:35

it go let it go don't get me

42:37

started on that Don't

42:39

get me started on that one Alright,

42:41

so let's take a quick break and then I want to talk to you

42:44

about one more thing. Okay. All right, we'll be back Well,

42:48

thank the baby Jesus Brian took a breath

42:50

and now I will use this opportunity to

42:52

let you know that we've got a brand

42:54

New phone number. That's right. It's two one

42:56

two four three three three TCB And

42:59

you can text us anytime you want or you

43:01

can call to me with a voicemail Oh, we

43:03

might just use your message on the show once

43:05

Brian gets through all the messages he missed this

43:07

year Anyway, you

43:09

can also find in DM us on Instagram

43:12

at the commercial break and on tiktok at

43:14

TCB podcast And of course all of our

43:16

audio and video is easily found on

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45:42

fog machine. The fog machine in

45:44

the background. Have you

45:46

been on Facebook lately? Lately

45:49

as in the past year? Yeah I was

45:52

thinking more like the past two weeks. No.

45:56

I don't blame you. I was on

45:59

Facebook. the other day. Although

46:01

I heard all the kids go to it for the marketplace now. That

46:04

must be the only thing still available on Facebook worth

46:06

of shit because I went on that fucking Facebook for

46:08

the first time in probably two, three, four weeks. I

46:11

don't know how long. I don't check it very often

46:13

because I just don't give a shit. We have a

46:15

commercial break Facebook page. I think it's got even less

46:17

followers than our TikTok. It's got like seven. We haven't

46:19

made a post there since 2020. Four

46:24

years we haven't made a post there. And

46:27

I don't intend to make any additional posts

46:29

because Facebook is really like it's like

46:32

the old people's social media at this point. And I'm

46:34

just not that old yet, even though I claim to

46:37

be so old. I'm really not that old. But

46:40

I will share that when I went on there,

46:42

they updated it, upgraded it. I'm not sure what

46:45

they're doing with it, but Chrissy, almost

46:47

every other post that they

46:49

served me up was some AI

46:52

bullshit, AI generated bullshit, some person

46:54

that I don't follow, some

46:56

magazine, you know, online magazine,

46:58

or they use Facebook as their

47:00

online magazine or whatever links to

47:03

articles, this all that it

47:05

is just trash. Everything

47:08

is AI generated. And so it's my belief,

47:10

and I don't know this to be the case,

47:12

but it's my belief that Facebook is now

47:14

using AI, really pushing out a lot of

47:16

content. The AI can make- They are. I

47:19

just listened to a thing this morning about it. Oh, really?

47:21

Yeah, a little Apple News audio. Okay, what did they say?

47:23

Yeah, they said Zuckerberg is, he

47:26

was all in on the metaverse for

47:28

a while. Yeah, that felt like a heart in church.

47:31

Yeah. So, and now he's

47:33

all in on AI. Well, I bet he

47:35

is all in on AI. And he had just created like a little

47:37

small team to kind of look at

47:39

it, you know, and now all of a sudden it's everywhere. And

47:42

so he wants to be in on it too. So this is

47:44

his big focus. Well, okay. Thanks,

47:46

Mark. Let's dig

47:49

our heels into yet another corner of technology

47:52

that's going to destroy the world because Facebook

47:54

is just trash now. It's just trash. And

47:56

I don't know too many people who still

47:58

use it. who still do use it, God

48:01

bless you, I'm good for you, but the

48:03

people that I know that still use it

48:05

are the people I least wanna hear from.

48:07

They're the people that only post on Facebook

48:09

about all the wonderful, awesome they are and

48:11

how shitty you should feel that they have

48:13

all these beautiful things and take all these

48:15

wonderful trips and their families are perfect and

48:18

all this. Right, there's not

48:20

a lot of authenticity. Yeah, then you hear

48:22

they're getting divorced. Well, I think they're getting

48:24

divorced because only people who are

48:26

getting divorced post shit like this, trying to

48:28

make it seem like

48:31

their life is better than it actually is. There's one woman on my

48:33

Facebook. I've known this girl since I was

48:35

13, 14, 15 years old, something

48:38

like that, 15 years old, I guess, because I

48:40

had started working in the McDonald's and so I

48:42

met her through a web of friends at McDonald's

48:44

and when I knew her, she

48:47

was a very innocent, she

48:50

was like, I don't wanna use the word prude because I don't

48:52

think that's the right word I wanna use. She

48:56

wasn't a prude. She was a little more straight laced. She was

48:59

very straight laced, very straight laced. No

49:01

smoking cigarettes, no drinking, no alcohol, no

49:03

drugs, no nothing like that, but at 15 years old, I guess that's

49:06

how you're supposed to be. I just happen to be a lot worse.

49:10

But she was also very sweet,

49:12

very humble, like you would have

49:15

believed that this person would

49:17

have grown up just to blossom into a

49:19

beautiful, self-aware human being. That's the vibe that

49:22

I got back then. I saw

49:24

her a decade later. I still got that

49:26

vibe from her. Recently,

49:29

probably say about six or seven years ago,

49:31

I saw her at a mall and I

49:34

met her husband who was a nice guy

49:36

and I was like, oh, good for her.

49:38

And the things, she deserves this. She deserves

49:40

a beautiful family. She's always been a really

49:42

nice person until we

49:46

connected on Facebook. And when we connected

49:48

on Facebook, I was appalled

49:50

at actually what I saw. I was

49:52

like, this is the same woman that

49:55

I've known all these years. This is the same girl.

50:00

She is a real housewife of Atlanta.

50:02

And when I say real housewife of

50:04

Atlanta, I mean a real housewife of

50:06

Atlanta. She lives in the ritziest neighborhood.

50:08

She drives the ritziest car. She goes to the

50:10

ritziest places. She has

50:13

friends with the most amount of cosmetic

50:15

surgery. It's like

50:17

total new

50:19

money trash. That's all it is.

50:21

And every single new vorice. So

50:24

right, Chrissy. As

50:26

my former mother-in-law used to say, there

50:28

is a considerable difference between new money

50:31

and old money. And the

50:33

sooner you learn to tell the difference, the better off you're

50:35

going to be. She

50:38

used to say, new money shows

50:40

and old money grows. So

50:46

when I look at these posts that

50:48

she's making, she's at the most expensive

50:50

restaurants, the most expensive hotels flying in

50:52

the first bits of classes. She's

50:54

doing all this stuff, but she posts it with all

50:56

of it, like humble

50:58

bragging. Right? So grateful for

51:01

all my beautiful friends

51:03

while she's drinking champagne in like a

51:06

private plane. So grateful for

51:09

all the wonderful people around me. God

51:12

is good. Look at what he does for your

51:14

life. I am

51:16

blessed with beauty beyond skin deep. Yet

51:19

this is your fourth fucking

51:21

Botox session this week at the

51:23

most expensive cosmetic surgery place in

51:25

Atlanta. There's so many

51:27

of them. So many. I'm thinking to myself,

51:30

what hole in your fucking soul? Maybe you

51:32

should have been taking LSD with me because

51:34

look how I turned out. I'm a poor

51:36

podcaster, but at least I don't

51:38

try and hide it. At least I'm not

51:41

trying to cover it up. I'm

51:43

pretty transparent. I am a

51:45

poor podcaster without a dime to my name,

51:47

and I have a tough life and always

51:50

just like you. I'm exactly like you,

51:52

listener. I'm exactly like you. I talk to

51:54

these people on this phone sometimes, you know,

51:56

sometimes after-dancers or other people, answers or something.

51:58

Sometimes I answer, I'll pick it up and

52:00

I'll read through and I'll go, oh, to

52:02

say something. I am just like

52:04

every one of those people. Just trying to make a

52:06

buck, just trying to get through life, just trying to-

52:09

Doing the best we can. Just doing the best you

52:11

can, trying to be a good person on occasion when

52:13

I'm feeling in the mood, you know what I'm saying?

52:15

Like, I'm just doing my best.

52:19

But these fucking yahoos out there on this fucking

52:21

Facebook, the people who are still left, at

52:24

least in my vocal friends, they just

52:26

can't wait to tell you how incredibly

52:28

rich they are with all their fucking

52:31

bullshit. And it drives me up a

52:34

wall. I hate look, because

52:36

I hate look because I just

52:38

wanna remember just how terrible of a person

52:40

that is. So when they're in bankruptcy court,

52:43

I can remind them of all

52:45

the bullshit that they were posting on Facebook not but

52:47

two years ago. Yeah, it's kind of a slippery

52:50

slope, right? Because I mean, once you start, you

52:52

kind of have to keep that up. And if

52:54

something bad happens, then you've gotta

52:57

then show that too, or I guess just go dark.

52:59

No, you go dark. Yeah, you go dark. Yeah, yeah,

53:01

yeah. Yeah. You

53:04

know, they humble brag their way to, you know, I'm

53:06

the real estate fortune and fame. And then it's like,

53:08

they're gone for 10 years. Just

53:12

got out of the same thing, doing well. Grateful.

53:16

Grateful, right for Zylin, hashtag grateful.

53:21

I know, and it seems exhausting to me.

53:24

I mean, I enjoy seeing kind of

53:26

people's lives of the kids and the

53:28

milestones and maybe grandma turning

53:30

90, something like that. But you know, yeah, for

53:32

all of the other stuff, I don't care. I

53:35

really don't care that you went to that restaurant, great. Yeah.

53:38

And for you. You know, the more that

53:40

this girl posts, the less her husband, who

53:42

by the way, I'd say,

53:44

like, I don't wanna be this guy, but I'm gonna

53:46

be this guy, because it's a commercial break. And who

53:48

gives a fuck? No one's listening to that. He's like

53:50

a four, and she's probably an

53:52

eight, right? And so he's like, look like

53:54

a little, he's like a

53:56

little squeaky, kind of dorky dude. But he works in science. He's

53:59

like some kind of scientist. or something, you know, that's like, he

54:01

just looks like a scientist, right? And

54:03

I'm sure he makes great money doing that. And I

54:05

think, by the way, I think she does, I think

54:07

she is a successful business woman herself also, at least

54:09

that's what she says on her Facebook page. Top

54:12

of class in the MLM, I'm currently working

54:14

in, I guess, I don't know. But

54:19

the more, it seems like

54:22

this started right after I

54:24

saw her at the mall. Like I was

54:27

looking at a few of her posts when

54:29

we first connected on Facebook. And

54:31

I thought, oh, there's a cute picture of her

54:33

and her kids. Oh, there they are at the

54:36

park, always with her husband, always a family picture,

54:38

you know, oh, Judy's going to this college or

54:40

whatever the deal was. The

54:44

more she humble

54:46

brags, the less her husband is in

54:48

any of those photos. Like her husband

54:51

has not appeared in a photo when

54:54

I was looking the other day. In probably six months,

54:56

her husband hasn't appeared in a photograph.

55:00

Yeah, he makes one appearance like two weeks

55:02

ago. And it's like, she's standing around these

55:04

women who I don't even know how she

55:06

got in the picture because her lips are

55:08

so big, but these Buckhead Betty sometimes, man.

55:14

But she squeezes herself in between lips and tits.

55:17

And it's like, so grateful for

55:19

the beautiful friends I have. They're

55:22

so amazing, their hearts are so big, blah, blah, blah,

55:24

blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Shout

55:26

out to my hubby for watching the kids. It's

55:28

like that, right? And I'm like, oh my God,

55:32

what the fuck is going on in that household? Now

55:34

I'm actually want to put cameras more in her household than

55:36

I do in yours. Because I want to see what kind

55:38

of misery they're all actually living in. You

55:41

never know what's going on behind closed doors.

55:44

Oh, there's this one post. There's

55:46

like two ladies in her

55:48

kitchen cooking. And

55:50

she's standing with a glass of champagne. That's like one

55:53

of her friends. And then you see one of the

55:55

kids that's behind them.

55:58

And it's like, you know, grateful

56:00

for these ladies making

56:02

it all happen at the house, you

56:04

know, and it's like Maria and

56:07

you know Annabelle and I and then

56:09

it was hashtag Amazing

56:11

nanny hashtag amazing made and

56:13

I'm like, what the fuck

56:16

would you ever post that

56:18

for why in God's? Great

56:22

world in the universe. Would you

56:24

ever say? hashtag nanny

56:27

Hashtag me. Yeah, why did you need to

56:30

do that to make sure that

56:32

everybody else knew that those were not

56:34

actually your friends Your friends wouldn't be

56:36

a makeup list cooking

56:38

behind a you know $50,000

56:41

sub-zero wolf the Viking

56:44

range, right God forbid What

56:46

you're putting that for is to let everybody

56:48

know how much money you have to spend

56:51

on hired help. Mm-hmm Whatever

56:53

fine hire the help cool. I

56:55

don't care You don't have

56:57

to humble brag about it by putting

57:00

hashtag amazing made that is the most

57:02

degrading Superphilis

57:05

bullshit I've ever seen Coming

57:07

from one of my friends. I swear to God and I

57:09

don't even know that I call her a friend anymore now

57:11

I'm like, yeah touch. I don't get it. I don't get

57:13

it. Yeah, but can I borrow? $100,000

57:16

to do, you know, you have to one up

57:18

each other and she's probably her her

57:21

Facebook group Everybody's doing it. Yeah, you know, well,

57:23

yeah That's the thing is that you got to

57:25

keep up with the Jones. Yep Once you get

57:27

in that rat race in that circle my wife

57:29

and I were just talking it seems exhausting to

57:32

me I know we are not keep up with

57:34

the Jones's kind of people now. We've taping our

57:36

Honda together just together over the school but Definitely

57:41

like to have what we like and are

57:43

happy for other people But

57:46

I'm happy. I'm happy if you have the

57:48

private jet and the nice cars and your

57:50

flight of fancy hotels I have also done

57:53

those things on occasion. I don't post about

57:55

it because I just feel that's really Insidious

57:57

almost it's like why am I gonna make

57:59

other people? feel bad and why do

58:01

other people need to know that I'm staying at a $500 a night

58:05

hotel, $600, whatever it is. I don't need

58:07

to do that. I'm here to enjoy this

58:10

moment that I have saved for, you

58:12

know, thank God on earth

58:14

some sponsor decided to pay us, kind of thing.

58:16

Yeah, I just went to Jamaica and posted nothing.

58:18

I know, why would you? For what?

58:21

For what? You talk

58:23

about it on the show, it's funny on the show, and then

58:25

move on. Exactly, I have my own pictures, we

58:28

took a ton of pictures. Yeah. But

58:30

I don't need to post them. No, they're for

58:33

you! Yes, they are for Japanese. So you can

58:35

remember the good times. And for our family. That's right,

58:37

so I can humble brag to my family. That's what's

58:39

important, is that you're better than your family. It's

58:41

not about people

58:45

on Facebook, it's about your family. It could

58:47

be true. I was sharing that, you know,

58:50

we have some friends, it's like, you know,

58:52

they came into some money and all of

58:54

a sudden things got different.

58:57

They were all crunchy and granola until they showed

58:59

up with some money and now it's like, oh,

59:02

free people! I

59:06

feel you though, I'm glad that you're

59:08

not like that too. Oh, I

59:10

think we wouldn't be

59:13

friends. No, I agree.

59:16

If you started posting about

59:18

your five-star vacation in Jamaica,

59:20

I probably would have jumped off

59:22

the roof. Well, I'm here cutting

59:24

lawns for extra money. No more

59:27

lawns. What? No more lawns. No more lawns.

59:30

Speaking of lawns, he hasn't shown up in

59:32

two weeks. I don't know what happened to

59:34

him. He scared him off. I probably did.

59:36

Come back, lawns, come back! I texted him

59:38

yesterday, he didn't respond. He's probably

59:40

listening to the show. Not a

59:42

show that motherfucker. Here's

59:44

your 12 to 3, bitch! Come back,

59:46

lawn, I

59:49

didn't mean it. I'm

59:51

sorry. I'm sorry.

59:55

Well, you know, I'm

59:59

not too hum... too big to dump my

1:00:01

own lawn. Let's put it that way. I do

1:00:03

however need a lawnmower. So if someone's got one,

1:00:05

I'd like to put it on next door. Yeah.

1:00:08

Or I'll be out there with nail scissors, nail

1:00:10

trimmers like. Ting, ting, ting, ting, ting. Alright.

1:00:15

Well, hey, listen. Guess what? We want

1:00:17

to have you on the show. Starting

1:00:19

in June, we're going to have callers.

1:00:21

I love this. I love

1:00:24

this. I'm so excited about this. One story is quite

1:00:26

amazing. I don't even know how we're going to do

1:00:28

this. But I mean, I don't even know why we're

1:00:30

bringing this on to the commercial break. But it's

1:00:33

what they've written is what they're going to talk about. I

1:00:35

think this is the one that

1:00:37

you told me about. Yeah, it's quite the amazing

1:00:40

story. Yeah, actually, I think that'll be late May.

1:00:42

We'll release that episode. So they're going to come

1:00:44

in here. But if

1:00:46

you want to be on the commercial break,

1:00:48

we would love to talk to you. Questions,

1:00:50

comments, concerns. Ask for our advice. You know,

1:00:53

feed us up. Talk about all the wonderful things

1:00:55

you have in life. All your cosmetic surgery and

1:00:57

your private planes. Love to hear it. 212-433-3TCB. 212-433-83822.

1:00:59

212-433-3822. Text us or leave us a voicemail. Let

1:01:01

us know you want to be on the show

1:01:04

and someone will get back to you

1:01:06

on how to do that. Also,

1:01:15

we'd love it if you would go

1:01:17

to the website, tcbpodtest.com. All the audio,

1:01:20

all the video. Get your sticker at

1:01:22

the contact us button. Give us your

1:01:24

address. We'll send you a sticker. Have

1:01:26

the commercial break on Instagram and youtube.com/the

1:01:29

commercial break. All

1:01:31

right, Chrissy, that's all I can do. I think so. But

1:01:33

I love you. I love you. Best to you. Best to

1:01:35

you. And best to you out

1:01:37

there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy

1:01:39

and I always say we do say and

1:01:41

we must say. Fly private if you can.

1:01:44

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