THE GUIDE TO MORE CONFIDENT RELATIONSHIPS

PODCAST #323 

In this week of The Confidence Podcast we are chatting about:

How to stop being jealous and insecure about your partnerHow to trust the nice things your partner says about youHow to have confidence in the future relationships you will have 

SPONSORSHIP NOTE:This week's podcast is brought to you by my partnership with Beautycounter. Look, I love all things clean - clean thinking, clean living, clean eating and clean beauty. I'm sure you're seeing my favorite clean beauty brand all over the news ... we were literally the top Googled beauty trend of 2018 and we are truly effecting change through beauty.  If you haven't fallen in love with Beautycounter yet, you're the one missing out. Shop for safer beauty and let me love on you a little as a customer ... you can place your order at www.beautycounter.com/trishblackwell 

REVIEW OF THE WEEK:

From: JenniferLynn322"My minds software update"Hello Trish, I started listening to your podcast about 2 months ago. At first, I was drowning so much in self-doubt I felt I couldn't even listen because "I wasn't ready yet." I now binge listen to your podcasts and often go through the notes online on the daily. I like to think of my time listening to you as my minds software update. Just as my iPhone needs updates often, so does my mind. I think that I pushed the "update later" button a few million-time s and now I am in a mass update and growing mode. I want to, of course, say thank you so much for all the work you do and how open and honest you are. I continue to learn every day and am working on many aspects of my mind and confidence thanks to your podcast. I wanted to tell you that the mean girl in my mind is now getting bullied by the confident and kind woman I am becoming. Thank you so much. Be you. Be free. -Jennifer Gil

OK, JEALOUS AND INSECURE?Confession, y'all. I have struggled with jealousy in my relationships. Not in the way you might anticipate, but let's face it, jealousy is jealousy. It doesn't serve us and it steals from our souls. Whether you are jealous and nervous about your partner looking elsewhere or you are jealous because you are throwing a pity party for yourself about how your life looks versus how he does (raising my hand here), jealousy is toxic.Jealousy is an indicator that you don't see your relationship through the lens of confidence ... as what it is: a life-giving, confident partnership.  Not a competition, not a tit-for-tat, not a threat to you.For me, I've had to pop my pity party balloons. How? Communicating. Working through what I'm really upset about. Asking for more help. Getting honest about what I need from Brandon. Resisting with all my power and might allowing the weed of resentment to build between us. For other types of jealousy - get your story right. Set people up, and set your heart up, to have to give people the benefit of the doubt. This will not come naturally, but if you want the relationships in your life to be life-giving and soul building, then this is a core component to what all relationships need. 

 WHAT SEEDS ARE YOU SOWING

Questions I ask myself in my marriage:How am I being present?Am I pursuing my husband now as I did when I first met him?What would happen if I gave Brandon the benefit of the doubt?Does what I am doing sow seeds of a lifelong legacy?How is God using our union for the greater good? 

 HOW TO TRUST THE NICE THINGS AND BELIEVE THEM?

 Chances are, if you're like me, you are like "compliment-resistant." Or, at least I used to be. I thought my parents, friends, relationships, coaches all said nice things to me because they "were supposed to."  Because my past relationships include domestic violence, abuse, assault and general negative toxicity, I was very broken when I met my husband. He had to step through a lot of emotional landmines.  And I had to learn to trust that what he said was true.