0:01

You're listening to Comedy Central October

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second two from

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Comedy Central's World News headquarters in

0:12

New York. This is the Daily Show with

0:14

Driver. Now here's a welcome

0:32

to the Getty to everybody, I'm travling

0:35

Noah, thank you so much for tuning

0:37

in, and thank you for coming out. Thank

0:39

you so wow, so amazing.

0:42

Our guest tonight, Our

0:44

guest tonight is an award winning author and

0:46

truly a fantastic writer whose

0:48

new book is called Red at the

0:50

Bone. It's gonna be a wonderful conversation. Jacqueline

0:52

Woodson is going to be joining us for everybody the

0:55

nom my little book and conversation you want

0:57

to stay choose for that. Also on tonight's

0:59

show, alligators could be joining

1:01

the border patrol, Vladimir Putin

1:04

exposes a secret, and Donald

1:06

Trump is getting impeached. Thank

1:10

you, thank you, Yes, I

1:13

thank you, I have I yeah, I have less

1:15

a little wait, thank you. So let's catch up on

1:17

today's headlines. Let's

1:22

kick it off with the story that has been

1:25

blowing up online today. It involves a

1:27

zoo of fence and a woman

1:29

who's seen the Lion King way too many times.

1:32

From the category of lucky to be alive. Take

1:34

a look at this video of a woman who crossed a safety

1:36

barrier at the Bronx Zoo here in New York

1:39

and had a close encounter with a lion.

1:41

The animal kept to itself, and the zoo said

1:44

the woman's action was unlawful and could

1:46

have resulted in serious injury or

1:48

death. You gotta wonder what the lions thinking here.

1:51

Oh, I know what the lions thinking.

1:54

He's thinking, what the fun are you

1:56

doing? Lady? There's a lion

1:58

here here? Can you not see it? I

2:01

actually feel bad for that line because look how confused

2:03

he is. He's got

2:05

that look like when you're not sure if you just

2:07

walk into the wrong bathroom. You know, uh,

2:12

actually, you know what? I think the line was really thinking. The line

2:14

is looking at her like, what are you doing? You're black,

2:18

you don't need extra danger in your life, lady,

2:20

what are you doing? And

2:23

what you're doing right now? Technically cultural appropriation.

2:25

This crazy ship is for white people. You shouldn't

2:27

be here. You shouldn't

2:29

be here here alright.

2:36

Moving on to some international news, Vladimir

2:38

Putin, Russian presidents, and man who thinks

2:40

the Notebook was a comedy He

2:43

has always denied meddling in America's seen

2:46

election, but yesterday he was asked if

2:48

he's going to meddle in and

2:50

his answer was refreshingly honest. He's

2:54

Russia, as Robert Miller alleged,

2:58

attempting to influence the elections

3:01

in the United States. Basically,

3:07

I'll tell you in a secret. Yes, we will

3:09

definitely in to the it's a secret

3:12

so that everybody can last and

3:15

so we'll go big. But don't tell

3:17

anyone please. Oh

3:19

you gotta love that classic Russian

3:22

sense of humor, you know, threats.

3:25

Yeah, it's just like we're sending you to Siberia.

3:28

Then after you live in forty years on Siberia,

3:30

we're like, that was funny, right, Yeah, it's

3:32

funny. Actually,

3:34

Putin is probably the funniest guy in Russia when you

3:36

think about it, because, I mean, it's easier to joke around

3:39

when you're the only person in the country not afraid of being killed

3:41

by Vladimir Putin. If you go

3:43

on Russian Netflix, he's got all the top stand up

3:45

specials. Yeah, and his stand up

3:47

is great though. It's just like women die

3:49

from poisoning like this, but

3:52

men die from poisoning like this. White

3:56

people drive car like this, but the

3:59

black people do not live in La Russia,

4:02

all right. And finally, let's move on to Tesla.

4:05

It's the call for people who want to save the environment

4:07

but still want people to think they're assholes.

4:09

And while every new Tesla is a technological wonder,

4:12

there are still a few bugs in the system.

4:15

Tesla's smart Summon promises to

4:17

allow your car to drive to you or a

4:19

location of your choosing from two

4:21

hundred feet away with no one behind

4:23

the wheel, as long as the car is in sight.

4:26

For Tesla, the ride of the future may

4:28

have just hit a pothole. This

4:32

morning, videos of the car company's autonomous

4:35

feature who failing

4:38

and fueling online criticism jeez,

4:42

with motorists shocked by near missus,

4:47

costly clips, and potentially

4:50

dangerous crashes, with startled

4:52

pedestrians chasing after empty

4:54

vehicles, Tesla's

4:57

latest cutting edge software is driving

4:59

concer turned into high gear again.

5:02

Oh man, I love that guy's checked that cars driving

5:04

itself. Hold on, but

5:08

this is this is really a problem.

5:10

I mean, I thought Uber drivers were bad at picking

5:13

me up. Now you've gotta call up your own car, like hey,

5:15

it's me. It's me. I'm at the corner.

5:17

No, just south of the people you just mowed down on the sidewalk.

5:20

Yeah, don't go straight. No, that's a daycare

5:22

saying. I keep going. Like,

5:24

here's the thing. Cars are not smart enough to give

5:26

them this feature, and people are definitely

5:29

not smart enough to have this feature, all

5:31

right, because think about it, people already drive

5:33

drunk. Now, what if you're drunk

5:36

inside of like a casino and then you accidentally

5:38

summon your car. That's just not gonna end. Well. Honestly,

5:41

I think we should have stopped giving cars features you don't need.

5:43

It's cool that a car and drive itself, but you don't need like

5:45

a car that drive itself in the parking lot. You know, it's

5:48

used to speeches, like when they put speakers in the trunk

5:50

of a car. Why do I need my grocery

5:52

bags to hear adele? I don't. I

5:54

don't need my ice cream getting that emotional? All

5:57

right? Just leave it normal, all right, that's

5:59

it for the headlines. That's me, move on, talk top story.

6:06

If you've ever watched President Trump,

6:09

and if you've watched him lately, it's

6:11

clear the impeachment battle has been getting

6:13

to him. For one, He's tweeted

6:15

two hundred and seventy six times since

6:17

Pelosi announced the impeachment inquiry last

6:19

week, and he's been in such a bad mood

6:22

that even watching Fox News hasn't cheered him

6:24

up. He's just like, yes, I am the best

6:26

leader, judge gned, but where does everyone

6:28

eight me? Well?

6:31

Today, Trump's rage moved from

6:33

his Twitter feed to real life, where, during

6:35

a press conference with the leader of Finland, he

6:37

did not react well to the barrage

6:40

of impeachment questions. His son

6:42

walks out with millions of dollars. The

6:44

kid knows nothing, You know it,

6:46

and so do we go ahead? Ask a question? The question,

6:49

sir, was what did you want President Zelensky

6:51

to do about President Vice President Biden and

6:53

his son Hunter? Are

6:55

you talking to me? Yeah? It was just a follow

6:58

up of what I just asked you, sir, Listen, you're we

7:00

have The president of Finland asked him a question.

7:03

I have one for him. I just wanted to follow up on the one

7:05

that I asked you, which did you hear what did you want? Did you

7:07

hear me? Ask him a question? I will,

7:10

but given you a long answer. Ask

7:13

this gentleman a question. Don't be rude,

7:15

No, sirr I don't want to be rude. I just wanted you to have a

7:17

chance to answer the question. Ask the President

7:20

of Finland the question. Wow.

7:23

Trump was rarely piste off that one minute

7:25

he was a president, the next second he turned into

7:27

a spray tan. Samuel Jackson asked

7:30

the President of Finding the question I double

7:32

dare your mother? Ask him

7:34

a question? Ask

7:37

him a question? You

7:42

know what? You know? What would have been amazing

7:45

is if the Finnish president got a question but

7:47

then threw Trump out of the buses, like actually, I would

7:49

be interested to hear your

7:51

answer on the Joe Biden's guy, you screwed me

7:53

again? Finish guy. Now,

7:56

Please don't get me wrong. I don't want you to

7:58

think that Trump didn't want to answer questions

8:00

at this press conference. No, he only

8:03

wanted to answer the questions that he

8:05

liked. Okay, what's your second

8:07

question? But you shouldn't be answering asking two

8:09

questions. Well, then you're gonna want to answer. Ask

8:11

ask one of the I will finish.

8:14

I think you want to ask answer this question, ask one

8:16

of the finished. President. Can I come back to you because

8:18

I think you want to talk later. Sure, Uh,

8:21

well, it sounds like it might be a good question. Let me

8:23

see if I liked the question. Goodhead there,

8:25

Maybe for the first time in three years, I'll have

8:27

a good question and I'll love it. There is a report

8:30

that came out just before you and President

8:32

and he still walked out here that the

8:34

whistleblower met with a staff member

8:36

of Adam Schiff. I love that question.

8:39

It shows that Chiff is a fraud. And I love

8:42

that question. Thank you, Jock, Thank

8:44

you John. That has to be one of the quickest

8:47

emotional U turns I've ever seen a

8:49

right because one minute he wanted nothing to do with that generalist

8:51

question. The next minute it was Trump's favorite question

8:53

in the entire world. Like Trump treated

8:56

that journalist the way people treat weights. Is

8:58

you know who keep offering the same olders over and

9:00

over again, people like I told you I don't want the goddamn

9:02

crab cakes. I don't want always that with a deviled

9:04

egg. Oh yeah, oh m

9:07

m mmmm. Thank you John. So

9:12

the past few weeks clearly haven't been Trump's

9:15

favorites. Impeachment is consuming his life.

9:17

His poll numbers are dipping, again. And on top

9:19

of all of that, The failing New York

9:21

Times has reported this we'll

9:24

breaking news tonight, an exclusive report in The New

9:26

York Times documenting the lengths to which

9:28

sources say President Trump was prepared

9:30

to go to stop migrants crossing

9:33

the southern border. He wanted the wall electrified,

9:35

with spikes on top that could pierce

9:38

human flesh. The New York Times reports

9:40

that privately, the President had often talked

9:42

about fortifying a border wall within water

9:44

filled trench stocked with snakes

9:47

or alligators. That's

9:50

right. The New York Times is reporting that President

9:52

Trump wanted to build a moat along

9:54

the border wall which was going to be filled with

9:56

snakes and alligators, which

9:58

I know sounds crazy easy, but to be fair, it's

10:01

been very effective at keeping him out of Milannia's

10:03

bedroom. That's probably

10:05

where he got the idea. I mean, it's either that or it's

10:07

because he's top immigration advised as an actual

10:09

reptile. Great idea, Mr President,

10:12

my cousins could use the lark now,

10:17

according to the report. According

10:19

to the report, Trump wasn't just coming

10:21

up with world the Warcroft upgrades

10:24

to his wall. No, he was also lashing

10:26

out of his aids when he felt that

10:28

they weren't making progress on securing

10:30

the border. In late March, President

10:33

Trump publicly threatened to close the US

10:35

Mexico border, but, according to The

10:37

Times reporters, in a March meeting, the

10:39

president's advisors tried to turn him away

10:41

from such a drastic move. He

10:44

responded, you're making me look

10:46

like an idiot, and shouted, I

10:48

ran on this. It's my issue, the

10:50

president reportedly berating then Homeland

10:52

Security Secretary of Kirsten Nielsen, saying,

10:55

quote, Lou Dobs hate you, and

10:57

culture hate you. You're making me look

10:59

bad. Wow, that is so sad.

11:02

Imagine caring that much about

11:04

what Lou Dobbs and and Coulter think of you.

11:07

I mean, that's one step away from being like you

11:09

better not embarrassed me in front of the musen

11:11

xt Burger. I swear to God, ask

11:15

him a question. Now.

11:20

The part of the Times report that's really blowing up

11:22

is that Trump apparently suggested shooting migrants

11:25

in the leg to slow them down as they were

11:27

trying to cross the border, which is not just a crazy

11:29

idea, it's also illegal. And apparently

11:31

Trump had a lot of illegal ideas In

11:34

fact, my favorite example is when he told a

11:36

room of border patrol agents to

11:38

just turn away every asylum

11:40

seeker who showed up at the border.

11:43

And then, get this, as soon as Trump

11:45

left the room, the head of border patrol

11:47

told everyone else to ignore

11:49

the presidents. Yeah, that's

11:51

wild, just like, huh, do

11:56

you realize the only organization where the top

11:58

guy gets ignored like that is McDonald's.

12:01

All right, yeah, no, because Ronald

12:03

is always like, remember our top priorities,

12:05

making people smile? Who And

12:07

then he leaves and the managers like, forget that ship,

12:09

We're here to move beef. You hear me, gon

12:12

kick the soft serve machine and make sure it still doesn't

12:15

work.

12:18

Now, some of you might be hearing these reports and thinking,

12:20

oh, I'm sure the president didn't really mean all

12:22

this stuff, and maybe he was just joking about the alligators

12:25

and the snakes, but it doesn't seem

12:27

like that, like the moat

12:29

filled with snakes and alligators. Apparently it was real

12:32

enough that his aids actually

12:34

went out to seek a cost

12:36

estimates. Yeah, they actually

12:39

got a quote for the motes, which

12:42

also sounds like the name of the most xenophobic Dr

12:44

Seuss book ever. I

12:47

mean, can you just imagine

12:49

being the Trump aide who had to call around to figure

12:51

out how much it would cost to fill up

12:53

border mode with snakes and alligators. But

12:56

luckily you don't have to imagine, because he had the Daily

12:58

Show. We have the exclusive audio

13:01

of that call. Thanks for calling, Peto.

13:03

How can I help you? Yeah? Can

13:06

I get a quote for how much it would cost for

13:08

two thousand miles of snakes?

13:11

We don't really sell snakes by

13:13

the mile? Okay, how

13:15

about alligators? I need a southern

13:18

border amount of alligators. Make sure

13:20

the alligators hate Mexicans.

13:23

What do your alligators think about

13:25

Mexicans? We definitely don't sell alligators.

13:28

We have birds, fish and gerbils,

13:30

stuff like that. All right, fine, give

13:32

us two thousand miles of gerbils Mexicans,

13:36

Gerbils who hate Mexicans.

13:40

Breaking news will be right back. Welcome

14:01

back to the Daily Show. My guest tonight

14:04

is the best selling author of more than two

14:06

dozen award winning books, including

14:08

the National Book Award. Her new novel

14:11

is called Red at the Bone. Please

14:13

welcome Jacqueline Woodson. Welcome

14:29

to The Daily Show. You and can

14:31

I just say, as someone who grew up living

14:34

in books. I like, nothing gives me

14:36

more joy than seeing writers treated

14:38

like rock stars. Genuinely,

14:40

I love it, like like people

14:43

love what you do, people really

14:45

love what you create. This

14:47

book is just being met with so much praise

14:50

and so many accolades. Read at the

14:52

bone, it's a story of two families

14:55

who are brought together because of a pregnancy.

14:58

But it's also the story of class and of

15:01

race. And when you're compiling a

15:03

story like this, and you're and you're telling this this

15:05

tale, is it hard for you to combine all of those

15:07

elements or do you just tell the truth and it comes through.

15:10

I think it's a combination. It's hard,

15:13

and I tell the truth and it comes through.

15:15

And I think one thing that happens is

15:17

the story begins to evolve. The more I

15:19

put those characters on the page, the more I figure

15:21

out about them, the more complex the

15:24

story becomes. And that became a very

15:26

complicated story. It also feels

15:28

like when you tell the story, you rely

15:30

on the reader to do work for themselves, you know.

15:33

So for instance, if you're if you're reading this book, it

15:35

starts in a familiar place, you know, it's it's

15:37

it's human beings. I mean, that's what most stories are as

15:39

human beings. It's love, it's family,

15:42

and then there's the conflict. You know, there's

15:44

there's pregnancy. But what's interesting is not

15:46

a lot of people would would think of a world where there's

15:48

a black family that doesn't like another black family

15:51

and they're separated by class. Yeah,

15:53

and it happens. I think,

15:55

um, the one thing that I was trying to talk about

15:57

and read at the bone is um is

16:00

black wealth versus Black income, and

16:03

mainly how this country has again

16:05

and again annihilated black wealth. And

16:07

so when someone is able, oh shucks,

16:10

yes, because when

16:13

someone is able to um hold

16:15

on to their wealth, what does that look like? And

16:18

when someone is not, what does that look

16:20

like? And so it made sense to have these two

16:22

families come together to create that conflict,

16:25

right you You you talk about black wealth,

16:27

or you told the story in and around it, But

16:29

what are you hoping the reader will take away from that? You

16:32

know, Like, what are you hoping a young kid who might

16:34

read the book would take away from the story.

16:36

I'm hoping first and foremost that they

16:39

have a good story. I think one thing that happens

16:41

when you read a book that makes

16:43

you think it changes you as well.

16:45

It creates empathy, um,

16:48

it creates understanding of people

16:50

who you might not otherwise meet in the world.

16:52

And so that's what I hope to takeaway is I hope.

16:55

There's a great scholar named Dr rudin Sim's

16:57

Bishop and she talks about the importance of kids

16:59

having both mirrors and windows in their books.

17:02

And so this is an adult book, but it creates

17:04

the same thing. It creates windows for the people

17:06

who come to that book and see themselves in it,

17:08

and also windows for people who would never make

17:10

characters like the ones that exist in that

17:13

book. It is interesting because you know,

17:15

you're known for children's literature,

17:18

and I know it sounds weird to say, but

17:20

it feels like you wrote this book for the

17:22

child in us. It's not a difficult read,

17:25

but it is a difficult subject for many people

17:27

to talk about. Some people say,

17:29

oh, no, why do you write about these things? And

17:31

I mean, and I mean it's similar topics that you write about

17:33

in your children's books as well. Why

17:35

do you feel it's important to have those topics

17:37

spoken about? Why do you why do you write about difficult

17:40

subjects because they

17:42

exist? And I think one thing

17:45

that happens when you have a book that

17:47

can tell a story this way,

17:50

people have someplace to go to to

17:52

begin a conversation. And I think that's

17:54

what books is so great at doing, is getting

17:56

us to talk um and kind of taking

17:58

away some of the fear about a conversation and

18:01

think people are it's hard for people's talk about race,

18:03

it's hard for them to talk about economic class, sexuality,

18:05

gender, all of these different points of views.

18:08

And when you have a book, you can say, well, let's start by

18:10

talking at about Red at the Bone and what happened

18:12

in there, and maybe this happened to me, or maybe

18:14

this happened to my friend, and so you can begin

18:16

to gather and have these conversations

18:19

across difference. Right, it really

18:22

is. I mean, that's that's how I've seen the world.

18:24

That's how many people see the words. Like you, you you read a book,

18:27

you feel like you know the characters, you feel like

18:29

you know the world of the characters, and interestingly

18:31

enough, you become more, you become comfortable with it.

18:33

Yes, you know, I used to think that magic

18:36

was a horrible thing, and then Harry Potter changed

18:38

my views on all of that. Now I understand

18:40

it I genuinely am more open to it. It

18:44

feels like that is what you're doing with race, with

18:47

sexuality, with with genders, with

18:49

identities. It's it's a powerful

18:51

story to tell. If

18:53

somebody reads this book and they just love

18:55

the story, what is the one thing you you hope subconsciously

18:58

will happen to them when they think about the

19:00

journey black people have had in America with regards

19:02

to their wealth. Oh, that's such a

19:04

great question. I

19:10

would love for there to be more empathy

19:12

in this country, you know. I would

19:14

love for people to really see each other. And

19:17

what I hope people take away

19:19

again, it's first and foremost a good story

19:21

that really makes them feel something and

19:24

think something and change some kind of

19:26

way. Um. And so I hope they

19:28

fall in love with the characters in there, and it

19:31

um makes them want to create

19:33

some kind of change. Um.

19:35

Whether that's change around people's

19:37

economic status, whether that's changed about how

19:39

they look at people from different economic status

19:42

is, whether it's change about how you know,

19:44

if it's white folks coming to this book, how

19:46

they think about Black folks that, whether

19:48

it's black folks coming that they know the history

19:51

of what happened in black communities around

19:53

economic struggles, so lots

19:55

of different stuff depending on who's coming

19:57

to the narrative. I honestly think you would

20:00

eve that and a hundred more things. It's

20:02

one of the most amazing books. Have a thank you so much for being

20:04

on the show. Lock

20:06

Off the Ball is available now. Seez

20:09

probably at the book Throwing the Story Jack and listen

20:11

to everybody

20:19

The Daily Show with vernoah Ears edition.

20:21

Watch The Daily Show weeknights at eleven

20:23

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20:25

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20:41

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