0:01

That real doll has really seen better

0:03

days. They're now streaming.

0:06

Yeah. She's changed. She's in rough shape.

0:08

She's changed color. Is that like some kind of,

0:10

I swear to God. You're right. For

0:12

sure. It wasn't ever this, this odd

0:15

gender non-specific, but also doesn't exist

0:17

color of olive or magenta, whatever

0:20

you call that. Yeah. Yeah. It's

0:23

really,

0:23

yeah. Bizarre, huh? I think it's just

0:25

like, you know, it degrades with the, you

0:27

know, the atmosphere. Color ring degrades? Yeah. Sex

0:32

dolls. That is absolutely.

0:34

Sex dolls are never going to be viable until

0:37

they can clean themselves off. This

0:39

is what, guys, sex

0:42

doll technicians and scientists,

0:45

you're focusing on the wrong thing. Okay.

0:48

Let me tell you, I don't want to try to Elon Musk your industry

0:51

here, but the

0:53

boobs, the jiggling and stuff.

0:56

I saw a video posted where they're smacking the sex dolls

0:58

ass and then the woman's ass and then they pan out

1:00

and it's a sex doll, right? Yeah. Oh

1:03

wow. That was a big ass. You got

1:05

me.

1:06

Right. Right. But, and that's, that's

1:08

great. And I'm proud of all of our accomplishments in that arena. Of course.

1:12

But the, I don't,

1:15

maybe I'm getting soft in my old age, but

1:18

women, God bless them. They

1:22

manage to clean themselves

1:24

off when you're done using them for

1:27

sexual gratification.

1:29

And the sex doll, if

1:32

you're cleaning the sex doll off, then

1:34

the doll is using you. Yeah.

1:37

You know, you don't go, it's kind of like, it's kind

1:39

of like your pets. They are using

1:41

me. Exactly. Really actually train

1:43

you. Yeah. We think, you know,

1:45

but you know, let me outside or I'll piss all over

1:47

the place. Like, I don't think you're going to piss all over the place.

1:49

You got to live here too. All

1:52

right. So there has to be more

1:54

resources dedicated

1:57

to self-cleaning. Once we get the self-cleaning

1:59

in there. women gone, done,

2:01

who needs them. But until

2:03

the self cleaning is there, um, it's

2:07

just not going to work. It's a nonstarter. Yeah.

2:10

And I never thought about it in those terms, but

2:12

well, that's why I'm here. Yeah. Well, I know you

2:14

just, you look at things from just a little, little different angle.

2:17

Got to get a really good view. Yeah. Yeah.

2:20

Yeah. Yeah.

2:21

You gotta, um,

2:23

we gotta innovate. Okay. Yeah.

2:25

What is a woman? We have to be asking

2:28

what are we trying to replicate here?

2:31

The jiggling, you got it. Yeah.

2:33

Nailed it. But what else? Right.

2:35

A woman can't possibly just be a bunch

2:37

of jiggling tits and ass is

2:40

what we're finding. We've got to be willing to admit

2:42

that. Yeah. I'm willing to admit

2:44

that women are more than just

2:47

they're more than just something to stick

2:49

your dick in. They also clean

2:52

themselves off because I'll be God damned

2:54

if I'm cleaning a sex doll, just throwing it away. Yeah.

2:57

You got to dump that shit out. You

2:59

sit in there scrubbing your own calm out of them.

3:01

What the fuck? What is this? Yeah.

3:03

I feel like a bigger loser then. I don't want

3:06

this smell on my hands

3:08

for the rest of the day. This half soap,

3:10

half rubber, half calm. Pass.

3:14

Hard pass. So

3:16

what this is woman's work. This is more work

3:18

than jacking me off to begin

3:20

with. Oh yeah. Sure. Sure.

3:24

These are my birthday thoughts. Yeah.

3:26

Happy birthday. Thank you. Yeah.

3:29

Send me a sentence. If you're

3:31

listening to a good slide in a

3:33

set of a new doll. This

3:36

one's been proper fucked. Yeah.

3:38

You're never gonna believe this. Uh,

3:41

goddamn house centipede attacked me

3:43

while I was taking a shit. A house

3:45

centipede. Do you know those legs? Would that look

3:48

like hair? Look like eyebrows. Yeah.

3:51

The fuckers attacked me while I was taking a shit.

3:53

How am I supposed to shit crawled out

3:55

from under the mat? She's after

3:57

Matt. When are wiggling around? Maybe

4:00

the biggest one I've ever seen god the mat

4:02

was moving as it was Relating

4:05

and climbing out from under the the to

4:07

the bathroom. Oh my god How

4:09

am I fucking this is my worst nightmare? I've

4:11

always my two biggest worst nightmares.

4:14

Yeah It three two number

4:16

one getting stabbed while

4:18

I have to piss Getting

4:21

stabbed every time if I'm walking

4:23

around doesn't matter how rough the neighborhood is

4:25

right cuz I'll fucking make fun of your Comic

4:27

if you attack me, yeah, I'll make fun of your

4:30

comic and reduce you to nothing

4:32

gotcha You'll be crying right

4:35

wondering what happened to your life, right? Wishing

4:37

you had a dad if you attack me on the street

4:40

you come at me, right? I'll

4:42

say what was it what's your favorite

4:45

part of isom and you'll be fucking just totally destroyed

4:47

done But

4:49

unless I have a bladder full of piss

4:52

Okay, cuz then I'm just for some reason

4:55

Worried that if I get stabbed all the piss

4:58

will come out of my stomach in the stab

5:00

hole and go. Oh great Okay, awesome.

5:02

Is it the important old show up and go all he pissed

5:04

himself scared. I'm like embarrassment, right?

5:08

Wow, I've always been super paranoid

5:10

about Having to piss and then

5:12

getting stabbed. Wow, that is a

5:14

specific one I just never thought I would yeah

5:17

hear that kind of in the same sentence

5:21

And Now I'm thinking I kind of want it

5:23

Right you want to get stabbed I want to get stabbed

5:26

while I have to pay so I can go I fucking knew

5:28

it Yeah, so you can be

5:30

knew it. I knew you could I knew the come

5:32

through my stomach. Yeah, I can do it Where

5:35

the hell is your bladder? Guess it depends where you get stabbed

5:37

right? Where's your bladder? I don't know

5:40

it moves

5:41

Hmm

5:43

I'm gonna get one of those so movable Yeah

5:45

of a stabber comes at me. Yeah one of

5:47

the like that guy that stabbed the that

5:50

white guy that we watched remember

5:52

that Yeah, oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah,

5:55

that was funny. That was before all this Israel stuff, and

5:57

we were still having a good time, right? his

6:00

girlfriend is like jeez are you okay hey

6:03

buddy yeah whoa whoa

6:06

oh wow okay you can

6:08

get up now you can he's gone wish I

6:10

had a little hooker gun to blast that guy

6:13

yeah right I'm hooker gun

6:15

I wish I had one of those little hooker guns I can pull

6:17

out blast them I love

6:20

all the fucking gun well it's gun week

6:22

you know yeah sure cuz the mass shooter

6:24

kind of got swept under the rug he

6:27

was there he shot himself he killed himself

6:29

in a trash can and can like Oscar the ground

6:31

I didn't never even heard about it I haven't

6:34

looked looked at it in a couple of

6:36

days I just like killed himself did

6:38

he kill himself yeah these fucking guys

6:40

yeah do

6:42

shooters do you think that they know they're

6:45

gonna kill themselves I'm

6:47

not sure cuz they all do oh you

6:50

doing man yeah some of them do a lot of them

6:52

do causing mayhem and stuff and killing more people

6:55

what's the deal yeah all this work

6:57

and then you shoot yourself in the head yeah what do you

6:59

think there's an afterlife there's not and if there is

7:01

you're going to hell when you rush

7:03

in and get there I don't know something

7:05

tells me he doesn't he's

7:08

uh you know there's stuff going on in there that

7:10

push it to the limit like dorner now that

7:12

yeah that was him now that was a criminal

7:15

right now that was a good criminal yeah

7:17

I mean he you know he had some interesting stuff to

7:19

read so

7:22

and then his manifesto talking about what are you

7:24

talking about Taylor Swift in there did I read it once

7:28

yeah fucking sucked that was a while ago

7:30

already it was I don't know

7:33

if it was worse than I saw him it was bad though still

7:38

a house centipede is worse than having

7:40

a spider in your car or in your jet plane

7:42

and you have to eject the centipede

7:45

in the bathroom is that the under

7:47

the mat it's yeah because you spider in your car

7:51

and you kind of you don't pay attention

7:53

to the road like you have that mode in your mind you're

7:55

like all right I'm gonna disengage from this driving thing

7:58

even though I know it's dangerous yeah you Yeah,

8:00

I got a look and see if this girl texted

8:03

me back You know sure I got

8:05

a look at Instagram a little bit. Just

8:07

a little bit. Yeah, Ralph's doing on Twitter Okay,

8:10

okay. I can get back to the road. That's the way it is with

8:12

the spider like I don't if I hit somebody

8:14

now They'll understand There's

8:17

a spider spider in the car man. I've had one

8:19

dangle right in front of me as I was driving Really?

8:22

Yeah, like from the first must have come down I think he came down from

8:24

like the fucking visor the edge of the visor or something.

8:26

Oh, they love that one Jeez, I love that scare.

8:28

Yeah fuckers got me But

8:32

the house centipede while you're taking a shit That's

8:36

unnerving. Well cuz then I'm in there

8:38

I'm like there's sphincters in

8:40

my ass that I can't I can't unclench

8:42

now because I know this fucker is under the I trapped

8:45

him Under the mat. Yeah, I don't

8:47

squish him with bare feet. Yeah, that was a mistake. I should

8:49

have squished him with a bare feet Okay

8:53

Squish him with the mat instead as an intermediary

8:55

device Yeah, like

8:58

I know I know you're not dead probably

9:00

how did you? So you're gonna what

9:02

he died in did he come out and then

9:04

you move the mat or something and then smash

9:07

them under the mat Crawled out of the mat. I thought

9:09

yeah, and smash the mat got it mid

9:11

shit Like I got a half log of shit

9:14

in there now, buddy. Thanks. Yeah with a perforated

9:16

edge because it was My

9:22

god Now

9:24

I got to go around all day thinking about this shit you

9:26

this half perforated shit you

9:28

forced into my ass I'd rather

9:31

be stabbed while having to take a piss. Yeah.

9:33

What was the other thing I was afraid of I forgot The

9:36

other thing you were afraid of Lord Miles

9:38

is calling in that's fantastic Lord miles Yeah,

9:41

you gave me a little rundown on him captured

9:43

by the Taliban for eight months eight

9:45

months I think it was eight months everyone thought

9:47

he was bad. I thought he was dead really like yeah

9:49

He got killed he must have got killed one fuckers

9:52

killed him Yeah, I got it. I'll

9:54

be in those guys driving a little oats around and having

9:56

ice cream nice guys. Yeah I

9:58

gotta know the I got another story

10:00

like what was he doing over there? Was he, you

10:02

know. He just likes going on like tourism

10:05

and fucked up places. Just

10:07

going to see shit. We have to play the theme song or else

10:09

people will get upset. Oh fine. Let's

10:11

start the show. 1225 fuck. Why

10:18

did I even write anything down? The

10:22

illusion of creation here. What

10:31

did you need to go? You got it. You love Dick.

10:34

You got it. Fuck,

10:36

I forgot the intro. You want Dick? You need to

10:38

do a lot of Dick. You got it. It's a show or

10:40

it is a contest coming to you live from Mountain Barco deep in the

10:42

heart of city failure. Me host Dick Masterson

10:44

joining me back from his tour of gay

10:47

Disneyland, Disney world. The audio

10:49

engineer. Hello Dick.

10:51

How you doing? I don't know. I feel

10:54

a. I feel great. Out of sorts. I

10:56

didn't remember the intro either. Yeah.

10:59

I was like, wait, are we are

11:01

we even live? What even is I don't

11:03

know. Even as a guy came down and said, you

11:05

didn't send out any of the links. Oh fuck.

11:08

Yeah, this is gonna be fucking hate that part of it. That's

11:10

my least favorite part of the week. Yeah. Getting

11:12

all the goddamn links together, sending them out to all the different

11:14

fucking platforms. So you've got to do multiple

11:17

links. I mean, I guess

11:19

I do anymore. So it's rumble,

11:21

which is slow as shit. The Mio,

11:23

which is also slow as shit. Don't

11:26

any of these people use anything? Make

11:28

it better if it's slow. Well, that's the thing

11:30

is because there are, you know, there's,

11:33

you would think that a lot of these, these, you

11:36

know, alternate, you know, platforms

11:38

would kind of jump on that because YouTube

11:40

has pissed a lot of people off, right? So

11:43

it's like, now is your time to swoop

11:45

in and fucking work and take a good

11:48

chunk of, you know, of the YouTube

11:50

market, right? I mean, yeah. Oh

11:53

shit. Did I open the wrong? Did I, did

11:55

I not save my, did I do all those notes

11:57

and then not save it? Oh, wow. Damn

12:00

it. God

12:02

damn it. Is that what happened?

12:04

Yes, that is what happened. I

12:07

don't know where I saved my files. How

12:11

was your trip at Day Disney World? I

12:14

almost didn't do a show last week. Really? Well,

12:17

Johnny was gonna fill in, but then he woke up

12:19

sick. Oh shit. And then Josh

12:21

Denney was out of town, and Vito was in

12:23

bed and didn't wanna get out of bed. It

12:26

was good. I had no idea how. Thanks buddy.

12:29

It was active, that place is. What,

12:31

Disney World? Yeah, just like all the parks. Either

12:35

one really. Yeah. Yeah.

12:37

I said that you went to Gay Disney World. I heard that,

12:39

as I was kind of needle dropping around, yeah, checking

12:41

things. I thought that was

12:43

funny. It's right on top of Disney

12:46

World. Right on top, right. Right,

12:50

there's a statue out front of Mickey and

12:52

Goofy spit-roasting

12:55

Ron DeSantis. Oh wow. And

12:58

yeah. DeSantis

13:01

is holding companies accountable who

13:04

boycott Israel. That's what the American

13:06

people need. Is that what he's doing? Yeah. Yeah.

13:09

He shut down some kind of Palestinian student

13:12

group in Florida, a Palestine

13:15

group. Yeah. Look, he's got his

13:17

mind, he's focused on the issues that

13:19

Americans care about, which

13:22

is restricting speech

13:24

that is critical of Israel. Right.

13:27

It's been going on for too long in the world.

13:30

It's gotta be stopped. What do you think about that?

13:33

I think he's a shoo-in for the presidency. I

13:36

think Israel might have his

13:38

PR staff running there.

13:40

Yeah. Running their

13:42

outreach, yeah.

13:44

They said

13:46

Hamas was Voldemort. What?

13:49

Israel said. Israel made an AI

13:52

picture of Voldemort crying looking at his

13:54

phone and then implied that he was looking

13:56

at the massacres that were going on in Israel

13:58

that Hamas was doing. Not that

14:00

Israel was doing that Hamas was doing the Voldemort

14:03

was crying. What fucking Voldemort

14:06

is real. Israel tweeted out

14:08

a picture of fucking Voldemort.

14:11

And he's looking at muggles getting killed.

14:14

Voldemort would be very pro. Is

14:17

this like a like an official Israel?

14:19

Yeah, the country of Israel tweeted this

14:21

out. He who they who shall not

14:23

be named and it's fucking Voldemort crying.

14:26

I'm looking at his phone. I got to see this. Okay.

14:29

You don't believe me, huh? You don't believe that Israel would

14:31

do something like this. I know I believe

14:34

I believe that countries do it's

14:36

so inappropriate. I

14:39

thought man you guys like do you guys understand

14:41

how much we hate like Harry Potter

14:43

references? Like do you think that we

14:45

like Israel as a country more

14:47

than we dislike Harry Potter references

14:50

because we don't at I got bad news

14:52

for you at Israel. Yeah, does

14:54

this make you eight want to does this make you

14:56

want to load up the aid

14:59

of Hamas redefines

15:01

evil that is fucking Voldemort

15:04

crying like he's reading a breakup text

15:07

going looking at

15:09

Hamas dash Massacry calm

15:12

which went to a Google site that didn't work. So

15:14

Massacry I've seen the Hamas

15:16

equals Isis thing all over the place. That's

15:19

not working. Who's fucking coming? The

15:22

Jews are coming up with this stuff. You got to be kidding

15:24

me. This is the second string Jews. Where's

15:26

this? Give me those good Jews. Where's the good Jews at

15:28

their marketing film? Yeah, you

15:30

know, like it can you

15:32

guys know can you good Jews break

15:34

us off? Just like a little saying or something we could

15:36

use now. I got a pitch in this Taylor

15:39

Swift thing actually. Yeah, yeah, I don't

15:41

care about you. What you guys are doing

15:43

is dumb. I don't care about just do that

15:45

Voldemort thing. That was fine. Is there anything I could improve

15:48

on it? Like should I make Voldemort be doing

15:50

a thumbs up because he's happy and he's a bad guy.

15:52

Sure. Yeah. No, we should make him cry like

15:55

every country the leadership of every country

15:57

when it comes to online stuff. devolved

16:01

into like a tween girl. Like something

16:04

that... It's like I want

16:06

you to be above certain things.

16:09

I want you to at least pretend

16:11

like you're the adult. Is Ray

16:13

Fine cool with this? Is he fine with

16:15

Voldemort being crying and looking at

16:17

a moss masochrome? Well, he

16:20

can't say shit because he'll be an anti-Semite. Oh

16:22

yeah! You know what I mean? Well,

16:24

wait a minute. I mean, not that I am

16:26

pro-Palestine, but that is retarded. I don't want

16:29

people looking at me and this ad is

16:31

cringe, man! Yeah, but it's like cringe! Put

16:33

Voldemort in there fucking killing Jews! That's

16:36

what... I'm Voldemort! I'm the bad guy! Zap,

16:38

zap, zap, zap! Gavaca-jabra! That

16:41

sale ended yesterday! Zap! Right? Is

16:44

Harry Potter Warner Brothers? I

16:46

can't remember, but I mean, somebody owns

16:48

the likeness of... But it's like nobody's

16:51

gonna say shit. Just put five out of five redditors

16:53

agree. Israel has

16:56

to be free. But something like that. Vegans,

17:00

CrossFit guys, and redditors all agree

17:02

that Palestine sucks. You

17:04

don't disagree with those people, do you? No,

17:07

I love those people. Jesus

17:11

Christ. Tomorrow we're closing the freeway

17:14

and having a bicycle ride

17:16

off for Israel. So if you're a

17:19

bicicleer and you love roads getting closed,

17:21

you're gonna really love this. 10,000 or

17:23

something. There

17:26

are mostly people making fun of it. What the

17:28

fuck?

17:31

Hamas is ISIS. Man, what?

17:33

We know that's not true. The

17:36

fuck outta here. They have their names. What

17:39

else is... Nobody in ISIS ever tried to hide it! That's the

17:41

whole point! Yeah. Just say

17:43

Hamas is Hitler. Why you stopping halfway?

17:47

What else does "@Israel fucking post?"

17:50

Stupid shit like this. Wait, what do you mean? The Twitter

17:53

account? It's got one and a half million people. This is a real

17:55

account, man. Oh no, I know it's a real account.

17:57

They're posting a bunch of multicultural stuff.

18:00

Ads here. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

18:02

Well, how's that fucking multiculturalism working

18:05

out for you guys? You imported all of

18:07

Palestine Into the US. I

18:09

don't know if you fucking idiots forgot this

18:11

but you need the US to work

18:14

for you guys to exist Yeah,

18:16

and you said and you imported the

18:19

entire Muslim world

18:21

into the US so it doesn't work

18:24

anymore. So that means you don't get to exist

18:27

Mmm, you were focused on the wrong wall

18:30

you idiots

18:32

What else are they doing I

18:34

don't know their homes were wants to

18:37

place look this is like a They're

18:40

doing like kids dying and fading away

18:43

like like Barney McFly's parents

18:45

Take

18:49

it a little take it more seriously than me

18:53

Here's

18:55

a guy from Tanzania They

18:58

they shipped in a black guy from Tanzania

19:01

the Tanzanian devil He

19:04

was kidnapped by a mod. You think a mods

19:06

is like now. I mean we know what can

19:08

you get it? Can you get a white one? They're

19:11

not gonna no one's gonna Don't

19:14

get a pay ransom for this motherfucker. Well, that right

19:16

right you guys watch think mark

19:19

think wait watch the news What's the deal? I

19:21

got a question cuz yeah Twitter

19:23

Twitter tarted. Yes. What's that? What

19:26

is a gray check mark? That's

19:28

a government organization. Really? Yeah

19:30

blue checks are individuals blue checks is just eight

19:32

bucks. You pay eight bucks Yeah, right, right.

19:35

It wasn't always that way was it now Elon did

19:37

that. Yeah, I remember that. Yeah, genius

19:39

He's a fucking genius that he

19:42

took over and Twitter and sold little

19:44

icons for eight dollars. Yeah Yeah,

19:46

the Edison of our age. Yeah, what a fucking

19:49

genius. Yeah So grayling

19:51

ray of government gray is government. I didn't know that

19:53

you can buy a gold one too That's like 10 grand and

19:56

what is that supposed to be? Just just said more

19:58

expensive more expensive. Yeah Unbelievable

20:01

we went to an Adam Sandler show my girlfriend took

20:03

me to an Adam Sandler show for our birthday slash anniversary

20:06

Real on birthday. Yeah, where's he playing?

20:09

Anaheim really yeah the

20:11

old ducks call us or the old ducks arena

20:15

Is it the Honda Center now? Yes? Yeah So

20:21

he It was

20:23

you know what it was it was heart-breaking

20:26

cuz he was so good Really

20:28

Adam Sandler told probably two hours

20:31

of like jokes and

20:33

little songs that he wrote yeah And they're

20:35

all just exactly like you remember

20:37

it was like being back in junior high Yeah, passed

20:40

around that they're all gonna laugh at you tape

20:42

absolutely until mr. Fancy pants his mom

20:44

found it and confiscated it Really?

20:47

Oh yeah, you know that oh no I mean

20:49

I'll had I got that there's a little unexpressed

20:52

fancy pants in me We all had that tape and we got

20:54

that CD and we would pass it around to each other and then listen

20:56

and headphones at home Like it's of a shampoo

20:59

bottle out of my ass. Yeah, yeah, exactly It

21:04

was wrong, but mr. Fancy

21:06

pants with this some reason the guy with the single

21:08

mom who's never home got it Yeah,

21:11

obfuscated and ruined it for

21:13

all of us. I don't even know the word got it. I had a copy

21:15

of that from My

21:17

friend Jeremy.

21:18

Yeah.

21:19

Yeah, you guys must have gotten it independently,

21:21

but oh yeah We might have taken yours maybe but

21:24

I know I had been out up to school. So guys

21:27

I got bad news my mom took my founded

21:29

and she said what the hell are you listening to it beat

21:32

me? So she put it on I Guess

21:36

I don't yeah, I don't know thing Disappointed

21:39

we didn't even grill him on it All

21:42

people had to get this fucking confiscated and

21:45

you're one parent. How did you how

21:47

did we all sneak it by everything? And

21:49

she's all fucked up. Maybe that's why

21:51

yeah, you got nothing to do, right? Our moms

21:53

are busy, you know trying to keep dad

21:57

in line. Yeah, right. I'm gonna deal with that shit.

21:59

Yeah How can everyone's dad was

22:01

Randy Mars of our age so It's

22:06

heartbreaking because he was so good and funny

22:08

and you're like well man, where is this

22:10

like in the movies? You could easily

22:12

make a good movie. Come on.

22:15

Yeah, I know you got it in you sand man Yeah,

22:17

come on and then every

22:19

single every single thing people

22:22

with kids do this and it's just

22:25

Fuck like a nomadic like a mnemonic hammers

22:28

driving me nuts every song Ripping

22:31

on his kids and his wife's hilarious,

22:33

right? Mm-hmm, but then after everyone's

22:35

no I love my I love my wife and

22:37

kids so much. They mean the they

22:40

mean everything to me. They mean the world It's like alright,

22:42

man Not that

22:44

what do you blink twice?

22:46

I'm being forced. Yeah, he's

22:48

to read this statement about your wife the 15th time tonight

22:52

Yeah, I'm acting up. You're making me feel bad.

22:54

I thought it was kind of funny. Yeah, you

22:56

know, yeah I can't go

22:58

up. Nobody else can go up there and say like me too I was

23:00

just laughing but I actually my wife and kids are the best Oh,

23:03

yeah, I was laughing too, but my wife and kids are also

23:05

the best exactly got fucking stop, right?

23:07

I dick and I'm an alcoholic.

23:09

Yeah. Yeah, I made fun of my wife

23:12

too, right? I just want to say I love my wife

23:14

right and then he goes This

23:16

was the capper he's caught. He's caught hell at home for

23:19

that. It's like, you know, I wish you it People are

23:21

gonna people are gonna think that you really hate

23:23

us How

23:25

do you know one's gonna think that everyone hates their wife

23:27

and kids what a stupid thing to say Stupid

23:31

thing to say of you you dummy so

23:34

he He finally does

23:36

this thing where he's doing some crowd work and he's like anyone over 60,

23:39

you know anybody Anybody

23:41

it's just married and stuff like that. Anybody

23:43

without any couples without kids, you know people without

23:45

cuz I hear you Yeah, okay. It's

23:48

not you know, I don't need to cheer

23:50

about that I don't need to be

23:52

made to feel good for something. That's great. Yeah,

23:54

right Who's

23:57

been married like I've been married for 60 years everyone.

23:59

Yeah

23:59

Yeah, it's been really fucking hard actually

24:02

thanks for the applause. Yeah, okay. I

24:04

don't care I don't need like applause for that

24:06

Yeah, being here without needing a babysitter

24:09

and having to watch the clock is actually its own reward.

24:11

So yeah So there's a couple of woos then he goes.

24:14

Oh, yeah, you guys were smart No,

24:17

but actually my it makes

24:20

everything worth it. Yes. Hold on

24:22

you fucker. Yeah, and Rob Schneider

24:24

gets up there and says You

24:27

Know Rob Schneider I do. Yeah,

24:30

he gets up and says Dylan

24:33

Mulvaney is a man with a

24:36

penis and it was like a bomb drop dead

24:38

silence We were like just like

24:41

just like out of nowhere. Yeah, that was his

24:43

act his act was Yeah

24:48

Man penis that has sex

24:50

with women Oh my god,

24:53

like where is he going with that?

24:55

It was a dumb joke But I've never

24:57

I was shocked to hear that he goes his first

25:00

joke was ladies gentlemen Judd

25:02

Apatow He's liberal. It's easy in Hollywood

25:04

If you're liberal if you shoot somebody

25:06

on your move if you shoot somebody they'll

25:08

let you finish your movie Meanwhile, you

25:11

get pulled over as a conservative call a cop sugar

25:13

tits. You'll never make a movie again And some

25:19

people didn't even know the Mel Gibson part Afterwards,

25:23

yeah Was

25:26

that Mel Gibson like yeah, he also said Jews called

25:28

cause all the war in that bull in that

25:31

shop that Rob Schneider was dying and he has

25:33

made movies again Well,

25:35

you know, he's actually he maybe

25:37

it's an old joke. He worked

25:39

his way back in I

25:41

mean he didn't have book re-board critically

25:43

acclaimed, you know. Yeah, I know

25:46

Don't you're talking to the you're preaching the choir

25:49

here. Let me see

25:52

Yeah So

25:55

that was fun That

26:01

was fun. Okay, let me see what else I got

26:03

here. We got a $300 buffet there. That

26:05

was not fun. Wow. Where

26:07

was this? Oh, you said, oh, at the Honda Center.

26:10

The bar was closed. It's like, oh, you go down to the Jack

26:12

Daniels. $300 buffet. Go down to the Jack

26:15

Daniels restaurant. You'll love it. It's

26:17

amazing. All right. Well, Jack Daniels,

26:19

that brand is synonymous with garbage. What

26:21

are they selling? Like bugles and cheese

26:24

dip? I'll eat it. That was great. Right.

26:27

I'll eat it. It's the Jack Daniels barbecue

26:29

sauce. The Jack Daniels milk. Yeah, all trash,

26:32

right? Yeah. Like a Walmart of liquor.

26:34

Yeah. I mean, I don't even drink it. I

26:36

guess it's probably okay. I mean, but

26:38

like it's the whiskey. Yeah. I

26:41

mean, like it's like of a certain standard, right? Like

26:44

I was never a big, like whiskey or bourbon

26:46

drinker. Yeah. Like that was not really

26:48

my, like if it was, if it was in that vein,

26:50

it was Scotch or Irish whiskey

26:52

was what I, some of the, that

26:55

man of the real car, but then you're not in the nuances

26:58

and subtleties of those things. Um, yeah.

27:01

So we go there, go

27:03

in the restaurant. I go. Yeah.

27:06

Come on, sit down, sit down, sit down, sit down. Yeah. Okay.

27:09

Here's the menu. It's a 70 bucks for a person for the buffet.

27:12

You got to be fucking kidding me. Yeah.

27:16

Uh, so we're there at

27:18

the $70 a person bugle. My

27:20

girlfriend at the bugle fast. Yeah. She's

27:23

like, Oh, it's great. This woman is coughing up

27:25

a lung. Oh God. Yeah.

27:28

Awesome. I thought she was doing a bit like the

27:31

lunch lady for Adam Sandler. Right.

27:34

Right. Uh, she filled our

27:36

glass with another glass, like a soda. Like,

27:38

you know, you gotta get a craft for that. Yeah.

27:41

You got all the, uh, the class of a Jack

27:44

Daniels that I expect, but, uh, the, not

27:46

the price. Yeah. Yeah. You

27:49

know, a low section

27:51

of, uh, of, uh,

27:54

the Yankees prices here. Uh,

27:58

but you got a woman. Giggles packing

28:01

up a pack of menthols. Yeah,

28:03

he's filling up my soda with other people's

28:05

soda what seems to be That

28:08

they're new ports actually Eric's

28:15

well, I said that in 2008 he He

28:19

would have kicked my ass and then

28:21

he threatens to shoot up a live event I'm

28:24

gonna see that a live event one of your

28:26

live events. I guess in 2008

28:29

He said in no he said in 2008. He would have

28:31

already well. Yeah, but

28:33

he's a different sure yeah He's a different guy now.

28:36

I have a bunch of stuff here. This still

28:38

uh So going on if

28:40

you can believe it going on. He's got

28:42

it. He's just got to stop He's

28:45

gonna realize that he's got to stop reacting

28:48

to it and my girlfriend said when you started this

28:50

air July stuff I thought this is dumb not

28:52

there will be nothing that ever interests me about this

28:54

yeah I said, but now I can't look away. Yeah,

28:57

you just won't stop Do

29:01

they have a like a release schedule for isom

29:04

I don't know Just curious

29:07

if he's working up to like four books a

29:09

year Which will all be trash.

29:11

I'm sure Let's

29:14

see oh Yeah,

29:16

this is let's let's do the actual news

29:19

events first. Oh really yeah

29:23

The Robert E Lee statue let's

29:25

melt it down

29:27

With I need sad music do do where

29:30

in Charlottesville

29:34

Charlottesville the statues.

29:36

Oh, yeah, here we go Charlottesville's

29:38

Robert E Lee statue has met its end

29:41

in a 2000 oops in

29:43

a 1500s degrees

29:46

furnace. Uh-huh the divisive

29:48

Confederate monument

29:51

The focus of the deadly unite

29:53

the right rally. Oh, give me a break that

29:55

one woman one fat woman got run

29:57

over

29:59

She wasn't so fat She would have got killed should

30:01

have jumped on the car hmm

30:04

The

30:06

device of Confederate monument the focus

30:08

of the deadly unite the right rally in 2017 was

30:12

secretly melted down and

30:14

will become a new piece of public art

30:16

honestly This is this yeah,

30:18

they're showing the head of Robert E. Lee.

30:21

Yeah being incinerated like Terminator 2

30:24

Yeah, like burning in a 2000 degree for

30:26

no thumbs up Yeah, this

30:29

is really an incredible work of art I have

30:31

to say like you're igniting you're

30:34

igniting the culture of an entire people I'm

30:38

not gonna. I'm not gonna really say white people but

30:40

kind of like The

30:43

idea of represent of being loyal

30:45

to your state and your people well

30:48

and serving a serving duty dying

30:51

for and suffering for duty is A

30:55

is a big thing for white people They

30:58

love it They can't stop like talking about

31:01

honor and rules like that

31:03

fucking football is basically war

31:05

for them yeah And

31:07

seeing it incinerated like this well you know

31:09

he was he was offered command of the Union

31:12

Army Yeah, but he his

31:14

name is Virginia. I believe

31:16

and yeah was said I I have a

31:19

Loyalty to my home state. I can't let

31:21

you know I'm gonna kill my own Neighbors

31:24

what are you guys nuts? That

31:26

was kind of it out. You know I mean

31:28

get enough tax money tough tough decisions

31:31

I mean a federal government. What do you

31:33

guys actually do besides

31:35

take money and give it to Israel? What

31:38

do you do you don't make the roads you

31:40

don't do anything for the schools? That's other that's

31:42

women that's nearby women doing

31:44

the schools. We don't need you guys involved

31:46

in that yeah The roads are contractors

31:49

also neighbors doing that what

31:51

do you guys actually fucking do not a

31:53

goddamn thing? No, I'm fighting for

31:56

Virginia actually. I don't I just

31:58

I I don't

31:59

like removing history.

32:03

Like I'm of the mind, I don't

32:05

think a statue of Robert E. Lee encourages

32:09

white supremacy. But

32:12

he was doing one of these symbols. Well then you know

32:14

what, forget it. That's yeah, then that

32:17

needed to go like this. That needed to go,

32:19

yeah. He was doing a blood thing like

32:21

this. Right, right, right. That's

32:23

so cool. If I was a blood, I would be doing that

32:25

all the time. Damn, you do that pretty good. Yeah, man,

32:27

because I'm hardcore. Yeah. How

32:30

much you fucking practice that shit? Fucking a lot. Now

32:33

I'm panicking, I can't do it there. I

32:36

also am trying to learn. That's really good. It's

32:39

good, man. That's good. Blood.

32:41

Yeah.

32:42

This is Eastside, right? This is what Eric would be

32:44

doing to me. I don't know. I'd be going like this

32:46

Westside. I'd be crip walking all over his ass. In 2008,

32:50

Eric thinks he could kick my ass in 2008.

32:52

I was bigger than I, I'm bigger, I was bigger in 2008

32:55

than I am fucking now. I was doing

32:57

Kung Fu and parking lots in 2008. Right,

32:59

right. I would make that's

33:01

what I was on Dr. Phil. You asshole.

33:05

Yeah. Yeah. Back then,

33:07

I'm a nice guy now. Right, right. I got fat.

33:10

I got money. I don't care anymore. Back then

33:12

I was hungry. I would eat your ass.

33:17

Give you

33:18

anal herpes. Right. Yeah,

33:21

I mean, I, I don't

33:23

know. I was just pointed. I agree with you. Put

33:26

it in a museum or something. You

33:28

know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. A

33:31

nice Nazi museum. Just whatever, like a Southern

33:33

history. There's got to be somebody with that

33:35

guy museum. Somebody would want to take

33:37

that. How old is that statue?

33:40

Who made it? Is it a famous sculpt? Of

33:42

course. I mean, of course it is. That's

33:44

what I mean. Like I don't. Yeah. This,

33:47

this, this never happened or this. I

33:49

hate that shit. We cannot

33:51

be so fragile as to, as

33:54

to that we can't even have a reminder

33:56

of something. I honestly think, I

33:58

honestly think. We're all

34:01

every time somebody does

34:03

this we're just all a little

34:06

dumber for it. Yeah It's

34:09

definitely catering to the dumbest of the dumb It is

34:11

and the smartest of the smarter purposefully erasing

34:14

history, right? Like well, we got to erase

34:16

this if without history, you don't you're

34:18

like a you're like an AI We'll just supplant

34:20

our history. So you will you will operate

34:23

based on those parameters I just I my

34:25

I've said it before I really believe this if

34:27

you don't know history, you don't know shit

34:31

Oh Well,

34:35

I agree with that but then I look at this and say

34:37

this is Wonderfully

34:41

a beautiful art piece that

34:43

they've recorded and made with this statue

34:46

like look at the Anguish

34:49

and the molten tears on this Robert

34:51

E. Lee if I was Yes

34:56

History I would not fill

34:57

me melting the head of the history

35:00

This will reach way more people than a

35:02

statue

35:03

ever could have yeah, you get this

35:05

on fucking Twitter for God's sake It'll last

35:07

forever. Yeah They're gonna

35:09

make they're gonna make a Something

35:11

they're gonna make the blackest statue ever fucking

35:14

seen is gonna be a big fat woman It's

35:17

they're making it. They're remaking it into a statue.

35:19

Yeah, they said

35:21

They said what they're doing with it I

35:27

Yeah

35:33

They're gonna repurpose the metal with

35:36

an inclusive artwork I can't find

35:38

the tweet and I read it I read it earlier

35:41

So they're gonna make they're gonna remelt

35:43

it into a a black woman

35:45

ordering at a drive-thru

35:51

Jesus right Ordering

35:56

and the screen will say justice.

35:58

My god What do you think about that?

36:00

That'd be cool if that's you. That's something else. We melted

36:02

it down and made this. Did you see the one where they're hugging

36:05

poop? It was like a George Floyd statue or Martin

36:07

Luther King or something. No, no. You didn't see that

36:09

one? No. Let me see. Black. What's it supposed

36:11

to be? Black. It's supposed to be a hug. Black statue.

36:14

But it looks like a hugging poop. It

36:16

just looks like a poop.

36:17

Man. Yeah, look. Doesn't that look like poop?

36:20

This is a new memorial for Martin Luther King,

36:22

Jr. What am I looking at? Poop. No,

36:27

that's a great shot. And I really can't see anything.

36:30

It just looks like a rape. Look at all

36:32

the hands everywhere. It's supposed to be a hug, I think.

36:36

A hug. What are they? They're

36:39

hugging racism, I guess. Oh,

36:41

that's what it is. It's supposed

36:43

to be. He's hugging a mistress. It's

36:45

MLK Jr. I'm gonna say mistress, right?

36:47

Yeah. Yeah, he fucked around a lot, didn't he?

36:50

Nice. Yeah, cool. Yeah.

36:53

Doesn't it look like poop, though? Oh, look. This

36:55

is a real poopy-looking angle. Yeah. That

36:58

looks like total poop. So

37:00

they're gonna have to top this one. The

37:03

poop statue. Yeah. Nothing.

37:06

I think the black woman ordering in a drive-through would be good.

37:09

What is she ordering? I've smoked a lot of emotion. Oh,

37:11

sure. She has no idea. Sean. I

37:15

walked into that one. I'm coming there every day. Let's

37:17

see. What will I have today? Bitch, you couldn't

37:19

think about that

37:20

while you're driving? I know you weren't thinking about driving

37:22

because it was so bad. Yeah. Rob

37:26

Schneider just gave me this feeling like

37:28

you really can say whatever you want. And

37:31

then Adam Sandler comes out. He's talking

37:33

about black people getting reparations. Like, oh,

37:35

my God. This is very... After

37:38

Judd Apatow, this is a real hard right.

37:42

And Adam Sandler comes out and goes, oh, Rob

37:44

Schneider, everyone, he's great. Like, you're not gonna

37:46

address any of that stuff that he just said? Shocked.

37:49

People are so dead silent. No

37:52

shit. Oh, yeah. Dead silence.

37:55

And then people start, you know, I was

37:57

like, oh, I gotta do this one. Whoo! I

38:00

don't think he's a... I don't know if

38:02

Rob will be opening for him for very long.

38:04

Oh, I bet he will. You think so? Oh yeah. Hey

38:07

man? Middle America dude? Depends

38:09

how much... Oh yeah. Depends how much... Yeah,

38:12

but depends how much the extremely vocal minority,

38:15

you know, shifts on him. Yeah.

38:19

He can totally get away with what he's doing. Yeah.

38:22

Well, I mean... What he's saying is way

38:25

out there, but it's like perfect

38:27

for middle America. I mean... Adam

38:30

Sandler couldn't say it, then he'd be done. Oh

38:32

yeah. The worst fucking part

38:34

though. The worst part... Adam

38:36

Sandler comes out... Which part of the tour is like... I mean,

38:38

did he just go out or is he just playing

38:40

a few places or is he like on a... Playing like 20 cities

38:43

I think. National tour. Oh, such a big tour. Maybe

38:45

it was the beginning, I don't know. The worst part is Adam Sandler

38:47

didn't do any lines. Or he probably has different people

38:49

opening depending on where it is. Yeah, probably. Yeah.

38:53

He didn't do any fucking lines from

38:55

his movies or shows. I was like, come on man,

38:57

just give us a hit. Yeah,

38:59

where's it close? You know? Yeah. Something.

39:03

Fuck. I kind

39:05

of had no idea he was touring. I figured he was just... You

39:08

know, he's making movies and stuff. I

39:10

mean, he's got a... He's had a big

39:12

production company for a long time.

39:15

Yeah. Yeah. Okay, let's...

39:19

Maybe we could watch this Eric July thing now. I

39:21

have a whole bunch of other stuff too. I guess we'll get to it

39:23

next week. I'm like sleepwalking through this episode.

39:26

You are? Why? I

39:28

don't know. What do you mean? Tired.

39:31

You're tired. Okay, here's the clip. It's a minute long

39:33

and then we got Lord Miles calling in. This

39:38

is Eric July talking

39:40

about... How old is this? Like

39:42

over the past week? Yeah, this is like yesterday. God,

39:45

I think. He gets on his stream

39:47

and he says something just dumb every

39:49

day. Do

39:52

you tweet at him? You're quite blocked, right? Yeah,

39:54

I'm blocked. He's blocking everybody now. He used to

39:56

be one of those guys that's like blocking is a weakness. Shows

39:59

mental weakness. Okay. Well, it's it's

40:01

kind of it. That's cool strategy. Yeah,

40:03

you're gonna get hit see how it holds up See

40:06

how you like it It seems like he draws these unnecessary

40:09

lines like whether I was talking about with it Just

40:11

his his concept of like there's

40:13

not gonna be any like You know, I

40:15

mean, I'm not retconning but you know None

40:17

of this like alternate universe shit none

40:19

of this like just you're handcuffing yourself

40:21

like dude What why can't you why

40:24

do you have to make these statements and then I

40:26

win circumstances change? Yeah People

40:29

everybody fucking does it right? I

40:31

mean like hear this asshole what you but

40:33

you flock people right black people Constantly

40:37

I beat Oh last week. Really? Yeah,

40:39

cuz he tried to get me to unblock somebody so

40:41

I blocked him That's funny. Okay. Well if you're

40:43

gonna work so hard at getting people unblocked, how about

40:46

you work on yourself? It's just it's just I'm

40:48

pissed as you know It's funny how it's like this and

40:50

a bunch of people who never put the new never put

40:52

themselves in any situation to be criticized They're like what

40:54

a pussy he blocks people. Yeah. Yeah,

40:57

okay. Maybe I just don't want to be annoyed

40:59

all fucking time Like

41:02

I wish I could shoot him but I can't

41:04

I can only block them, right? fucking

41:07

veto Three minutes

41:09

before our show. Yeah

41:11

says the guy who mr. Antagonism

41:14

the guy who has started fights with all

41:16

of my friends. Yeah, he's Way

41:19

to start fights with fucking all of them causes

41:22

like relationship affecting

41:26

Arguments with people Constantly

41:29

constantly right before our show

41:31

starts. He says, uh, oh, can you not antagonize?

41:34

No, like Kiwi farms not

41:36

make fun of them because it's affecting me. What

41:38

are you making fun of him lately? Yeah, of

41:40

course

41:42

Knowles being a little weirdo

41:45

Uh shocker, but

41:47

I'm like I'm sitting there going What

41:50

yeah, of course I'm gonna make fun

41:52

of him he's saying retarded shit Yeah,

41:54

the reason the biggest reason why he hates

41:57

me is because of you you did

41:59

all this this with all the fucking

42:01

pedophile jokes, you, that

42:03

I defend so I get shit for

42:05

it. And now you are saying not to

42:07

get involved? Are you fucking high? What

42:10

have you been doing this whole time? You have caused

42:12

so many problems for everybody

42:14

with your fucking feuds online and

42:16

now you tell first of all, what in my 12 years

42:19

of podcasting... How

42:21

long has it been? We

42:22

started in what, 2012? Yeah, then the 11 years?

42:24

The show actually was

42:28

like 20, we did those six episodes or

42:30

whatever, 2014 I believe. In my 9, 10 years of

42:33

podcasting, if I have ever given anybody

42:35

the impression that I appreciate

42:37

feedback on my behavior, I fucking

42:40

don't. Go ahead and review it

42:42

from day one. That's always been

42:44

a problem. Hey, you know,

42:46

I was looking at your behavior. Either say

42:49

it on air or don't

42:51

tell me because I do not, I cannot

42:53

have two minds. I cannot have a, I'm

42:56

not Hillary Clinton. Right.

42:58

Right. Can you just not antagonize Noel?

43:02

What have you been doing this

43:03

whole fucking time? Yeah.

43:06

Are you, I don't know their history,

43:08

but I know Noel got, it was a

43:10

bunch of like, he thought, he

43:13

thought this show was like defending pedophilia

43:15

or something. Right? Is that, I mean, is that always

43:17

not, I mean, I don't even know if that's, he

43:20

can't be curious about that. I have no idea.

43:22

It's gotta just be some kind of

43:24

feelings hurt shit.

43:26

I don't know. I, you know, I don't know what

43:28

goes on behind the scenes on

43:31

this show. And I don't ask. I really don't

43:33

want to. I mean, it goes on, on Twitter

43:35

and across, across

43:37

various streams. Yeah,

43:40

exactly. Good for you. It's

43:43

just, it's just a little bit of teasing. I'm

43:45

just busting his balls a little bit to, you know, wake,

43:47

like, Hey, wake up. Stop

43:49

being so weird and goofy with everybody.

43:51

You goddamn goofball. Yeah.

43:54

I

43:55

can veto. Can you not? I mean.

43:59

There's so many layers

44:02

to that. I don't even know where to start. Uh...

44:07

Yeah. I'm short-circuiting.

44:09

I'm so angry. I'm short-circuiting. Yeah,

44:12

yeah, yeah, yeah. There's so much to say. It's the three stooges

44:14

trying to get through the door. Yeah. Yeah. You're

44:16

not? Like, I mean, I'm trying to not make

44:18

fun of you now. Yeah. What do you mean, can

44:20

I not? No. No. Yeah. I

44:23

can't. Yeah. Uh, I'm like

44:25

the manatees and family guy. If you tell me I can't

44:27

talk about something, I just can't function. I

44:29

just want to talk about it. Alright, here's Eric

44:32

saying he's gonna... With

44:35

a time machine. And a fucking du-rag.

44:38

This is my fan, a black millionaire

44:40

wearing a fucking du-rag and a tank

44:42

top. Dude, I can't get over how much he looks like Kimbo

44:45

Slice. Like,

44:47

I'm not even... I'm not even... Like,

44:50

that's not a joke or like a... That's not even... It's definitely

44:52

a joke. But it's not even a put-down. Like, that's

44:54

just like... I mean, dude, he looks... Well, yeah, it kinda is,

44:56

because he's like a fat Kimbo Slice. I

44:59

mean, I don't even... I've never seen the guy standing up. I can't

45:01

even tell if he's fat there, but I mean, like, just every...

45:03

Like, just his face... I

45:05

mean, and the beard and the du-rag. But I mean,

45:07

like, dude, he looks like Kimbo Slice. Let's see.

45:10

Let me pull up. Oh my God.

45:15

Maybe like, think more like Kimbo Slice.

45:17

Well, his beard was a little shaggy-er, yeah. There?

45:19

Which one? This one? The bottom one. This one? Yeah,

45:22

that is... Wow. Eric Kimbo

45:25

Slice July. Look at that. All

45:30

right. Let's play the video. To

45:33

not take

45:34

shots back, especially when they cross the line.

45:36

But I... Well, look, everybody saw him

45:39

just stop

45:40

feeding the trolls. I know, I know, I know.

45:42

Every time. Look, what it is is

45:45

they just... It's because he did... It's just on shit. You

45:47

can't stop feeding the trolls, because you

45:49

don't need to feed them. Because I could do and say whatever I want,

45:51

what it is. He's saying, you know, there are

45:53

some things you just can't ignore, is

45:55

what it sounds like he's saying. Yeah, but

45:57

there is. So you could ignore everything. You can.

46:00

I mean, you can you ignored that lawsuit.

46:03

Now it got filed. So yeah, it looks

46:05

like it looks like you can't ignore after all. All right. Yeah.

46:07

To not take

46:09

shots back, especially when they cross the line,

46:11

but I well, look, if, if,

46:13

yeah, if it was Eric, July. Two,

46:17

let me say this. Yeah.

46:19

If it was Eric, July, 2008, 2009, I would have probably already

46:24

knocked a couple motherfuckers blocks off. Oh,

46:26

knock the block the block. That's

46:36

such a that's such an old expression

46:38

like a Charlie Brown expression is like

46:40

I'll knock your block off. You're a woman. Knock your block

46:43

off. What my block? That's

46:45

why I block. It's

46:47

just I it's been so long since I've heard that

46:49

expression. Pull up. I'm a knock

46:51

your block off. You're

46:54

gonna suck my cock off. I'm gonna knock

46:56

your block off. You're gonna get my rocks off. What

46:58

are you saying? Fucking mumbles. You're gonna do what

47:00

to me? Not

47:02

some motherfuckers blocks off. Yeah,

47:04

with a block knocking crew. So I'm here

47:07

today. I'll knock the block off in a major

47:09

way. That's

47:11

such an old expression. You're

47:13

gonna punch me so my blocks will fall out

47:15

right or off. You're

47:18

gonna knock my blocks off. How

47:22

like a punch right? He's threatened.

47:24

Yeah, right. Yeah, 2008. He would have

47:27

talked about killing anybody. He's

47:29

talking about, you know, I can block something by knocking

47:31

you out. Yeah, getting your rocks off, right?

47:37

2008 I was I was fit in 2008.

47:40

Yeah. Yeah. We

47:42

all were more fit in 2008. I would

47:44

fucking I would feed Eric July his underpants in 2008.

47:47

Yeah, I would pull his underpants off right

47:49

and then spank his hairy

47:51

ass

47:52

feed him his own underpants. Yeah.

47:55

Write

47:55

a comic about this. Cut it out for him. Chrissy

47:57

dancing. Like cutting up a steak for a...

48:00

For a kid I would fry underpants yep

48:03

put him in a high chair you go buddy sit in his high

48:05

chair I got for you. Yeah, here you go down

48:07

out on dribble at you. Here's your underpants,

48:10

right? It's

48:12

your underpants you idiot

48:17

Alright so I can blocks off yeah, whoo

48:20

Wow Yeah

48:23

That's when he was getting He was

48:26

doing that gay dance moves remember when

48:28

we showed you that he was doing those yeah

48:30

stripper dance. Yeah. Yeah He's

48:33

talking about dancing my dancing mine Blocks

48:36

off maybe

48:38

You lose that too sucking rocks

48:40

off I Put

48:42

on suavecito. Mmm fucking

48:45

I would merengue his ass into the next world. Well

48:47

damn

48:49

Like this get one of these Trump

48:51

yeah, I move like this here on my stomach. Oh, man. Yeah

48:57

No, uh my blocks are guarded no

48:59

retort for that Could

49:02

you imagine being a fucking millionaire going

49:04

on talk about knocking motherfuckers blocks

49:06

off I mean if that's your you know if that's

49:08

your thing I mean wearing a do rag.

49:10

I think I how'd you stream go

49:12

pretty good I put a do rag on and said I would knock

49:14

blocks motherfuckers blocks off right that's

49:17

a time machine Yeah,

49:19

kickstart me a time machine. Yeah

49:22

Like so I don't get me wrong I get it

49:27

Get what cuz some lines have been crossed

49:29

or some things that have been done It's crazy

49:31

because I've been seeing especially with the whole like

49:33

my my my ancestor and stuff You

49:36

know seeing what happened out of that and to see people

49:38

that dislike me even saying

49:40

well, okay That's a step too far. Let you know how

49:44

Truck I get it. Hey, yeah, wait what

49:46

truck? What was that word? I miss that fuckers

49:48

off truck. I get it F-150

49:52

trucks me trucks me. Yeah trucks

49:54

me. Oh I get

49:56

it. Yeah trucks me. I get it trucks

49:58

me. That's like You know, it's like

50:01

when you use a noun as a verb

50:03

or something like where you're, you know, like, yeah,

50:06

yeah, or just, you know, like, you know,

50:08

ham sandwich me, you

50:10

know, like, yeah, beer me.

50:12

Exactly. Yeah. Do rag me. Yeah. Trucks. I got

50:14

to get my do rag on. I'm

50:18

going to talk today. Yeah. Yeah.

50:21

The white boys love do rags and talking to say, you know,

50:23

could you hand me a sandwich out of the cooler? You

50:25

sandwich me. Yeah. Yeah. And

50:28

then they give me bro. The

50:30

trucks, because it's the cooler is way over

50:32

there and then a nice Ziploc bag and you just

50:34

fucking fling it like a frisbee. It's cool. Everybody's

50:36

cool. Everybody's cool. When you say sandwich,

50:39

the guy who gets, who understands

50:41

what you said, the guy who reaches in and flips,

50:44

you said sandwich and you for catching

50:47

it like a bad ass. Boom.

50:49

Sandwich me, bro. Trucks me, bro. Yep.

50:51

I walk into the dealership, the Ford dealership,

50:53

truck me, bro. And you

50:56

drive it right through the fucking window. And

51:00

yeah, had it been, you know, cause it ain't like,

51:03

it ain't like just like they do all this digging

51:05

to try to docs and do all this shit and try

51:07

to come in the, you know, that can happen

51:09

to them. Right. Y'all understand

51:12

that.

51:15

Digging the docs, a dude in a do rag

51:17

and digging the docs. That's me digging

51:20

the docs man. And the same thing can it do happen

51:22

to them. Man,

51:31

we don't have fucking black people. This white in LA.

51:34

Holy shit. Could you imagine walking

51:38

down skid row? You'll wear you, you,

51:40

you do into docs. Chokes me brother. Yeah. You're

51:43

doing a doc's man. My ancestors.

51:45

You don't got no ancestors. Fuck you. Get away

51:48

from me. You crack head. You

51:52

fucking fentanyl addict. Don't look at me. Okay.

51:56

So he's saying the same thing could happen to them. Yeah. Man

52:01

everyone knows where I live. What are you talking about? That

52:03

could happen to them, right? Y'all do understand

52:06

that. Right? You can be touched

52:08

like straight up. My

52:11

wiener? What do you mean? Touched?

52:14

I don't know. Like AT&T? Yeah.

52:16

What do you mean touched? Right. Trust

52:19

me, I can touch you. I can dox you,

52:21

I can touch you. Yeah, right. Oh, yeah,

52:25

yeah, yeah. Vito tweeted upon hearing

52:27

this, he tweeted, I would love for Eric July to come

52:29

to a live event and try to fight us. And I said, what

52:32

do you mean us? Yeah. What is where

52:34

was the us part? I don't want anyone to come fight me.

52:37

Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you think that if someone's fighting

52:39

you, I'm jumping in, I'm not. Uh huh. I

52:41

don't want my I don't want to be sore. First

52:44

of all, right. Best case scenario, I

52:46

am sore the next day. And this is not

52:48

just, you know, I'm not going to activity. I don't

52:50

do I got things that. Yeah, I'm not. I wouldn't

52:52

I need to be in prime working out condition.

52:55

Don't have to wait for good Pilates or something. I'm not being

52:57

sore on your behalf. Sure. Let's fuck what I do that.

52:59

Yeah. Trust me. If it

53:01

was 2008, 2009 me. Oh,

53:04

yeah, I'm coming to see motherfuckers. But

53:06

oh, you got a little bit. You got

53:08

a little bit that you're going to. OK, yeah. How

53:10

about I make up? What

53:13

was that? Do you see that move? Yeah. Shooting

53:15

motion. Did you fucking see that,

53:18

Sean? Yeah. Oh, Eric.

53:21

Oh, Eric, you dirty motherfucker. You

53:23

dirty, you slippery motherfucker.

53:25

Did you fucking see that? He's talking about coming to events

53:28

and shooting them up without saying

53:30

it. That was a non me. Oh,

53:33

yeah, I'm coming to see motherfuckers. But

53:35

oh, you got a little bit. You got

53:37

a little bit that you're going to. OK, yeah. How

53:40

about I make a.

53:42

Oh, yeah,

53:43

exactly. Yeah. How

53:46

about I make a call

53:48

it drive by? Yeah, right. Hmm.

53:54

At least it's a motivation.

53:56

Sure. You know,

53:58

the story. Showing

54:00

up at your event, shooting you.

54:02

So what does this have to do, like with

54:05

comics? Well no, no. Like with

54:07

anything. Like, okay, so if it, so, what's

54:10

he saying, but like, I'm better than that now,

54:12

so I'm not gonna do it. I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna

54:14

talk about it. I'm just gonna talk about it. I'm

54:17

late. I gotta get, we gotta get Lord Miles. I don't

54:20

finish this up. No one gets Lord Miles. Unannounced

54:22

appearance! And

54:25

maybe things get physical. Like, whoa!

54:28

That's not me anymore. Okay, there

54:30

he is. Doesn't sound like it.

54:33

Well, I mean. Doesn't sound like it's not you anymore.

54:36

I mean, it just sounds like he's fantasizing about, about

54:38

like doing that, which, you know, a lot of

54:40

people do. So it's like, yeah,

54:43

sure. I mean, everybody

54:46

wants to turn somebody's face into pudding. Not me.

54:48

You know? I don't want to do that. Oh,

54:51

I do. On a daily basis. Uh,

54:53

okay. A daily basis.

54:56

We're ready to go. You'll never, you'll never

54:58

hear me preach non-violence. Like

55:01

you just, sometimes it's

55:04

like, oh no. Almost never,

55:06

almost never is it worth it. Except when it is. But

55:10

you're also not like going around, like having

55:13

live streams talking about how you're such a

55:15

badass and fucking 15 years

55:17

ago. My idea of

55:20

just like making my living

55:22

on the internet, like sounds

55:24

like my idea of hell. Like I just,

55:26

not everyone is like this on the internet. No,

55:29

I understand that. Although

55:31

a guy did threaten to rape my

55:34

penis with his mouth this week. Did you see that? Really?

55:37

It was quite an evening. He said he would come to my house

55:39

and suck my cock. Really? Odd.

55:43

Well, I mean, that guy. Is that a threat? Yeah,

55:46

I don't want my cock sucked by that guy. ReviewTech

55:48

USA was his name. Okay.

55:50

Um, okay. Well, wait for

55:52

Lord Miles. All right. I said,

55:54

ready to go. If you are David says,

55:56

usually when someone enjoys the con,

55:59

their content, they will trade.

55:59

over themselves to tell you their favorite part. Nobody

56:02

can tell you what their favorite part is. It probably sucks. Yeah, that's

56:04

true. That's a lot of eyes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I don't

56:07

know if you heard that part last week. Eric said that

56:09

asking people what their favorite part is gay shit.

56:12

Quote,

56:13

what if somebody said gay shit? Eric

56:16

said that asking someone their phone,

56:18

everyone to ask what, what's your favorite part of eyes on?

56:20

If anybody comes out sick, cause they haven't read it. Right.

56:22

And it sucks either anyway. Yeah. So

56:25

now he's Eric says that's gay shit. Okay.

56:28

Asking what your favorite part is. Uh,

56:30

frozen dog. Holy shit, Eric. Yeah. My

56:32

local government paid for an assessment to find out

56:35

whether their lockdowns and mask mandates were

56:37

effective. They tell it like it's gospel.

56:39

Um, same logic Eric is using,

56:43

which he totally agree with. I don't know what that means.

56:45

So no be assault. Hey, Dick, uh, I think Eric

56:47

or his supporters are mass flagging your supporters

56:49

on Twitter. Huh? Yeah, probably.

56:54

No news there. Um, hot

56:57

shot. Scott said the clips that were played

56:59

of that psycho who

57:02

was sympathetic to Eric July was my favorite part of

57:04

the episode. Okay. Oh, I didn't hear that.

57:06

The guy said he'd break necks. If anybody showed

57:08

up at his ancestors grave.

57:10

Oh really? He'd break your neck. Huh?

57:12

All right. Well,

57:14

that crazy. Yeah. I mean, you know, I

57:16

don't think your ancestors would want you to be breaking anyone's

57:18

neck. No, we're probably not

57:21

over their grave. I don't, Hey, I don't think so.

57:24

Guys. It's, um,

57:26

it's not real. All that stuff. Yeah. Trucks your ancestor.

57:29

It's like a corpse in the ground. Yeah. Yeah.

57:31

Yeah. The gravestone, the whole

57:33

gravestone thing is gay. Today

57:36

was my first, this year was my first birthday where my

57:38

grandma didn't call me at six in the morning to sing me happy

57:40

birthday. Oh wow. Really?

57:42

Yeah. Wow. That's, that's kind of sad. It

57:45

was kind of sad. I woke up at 11 and said,

57:48

Oh, it's pretty crazy. Like

57:50

you've had that you've

57:52

had grandparents who are still around when you're in

57:54

your forties. Yeah. Most of us, my

57:56

grandparents were all dead by the time I was

57:58

like mid. Like maybe later

58:01

like 26 27 hmm, and

58:04

they didn't you know like some people had

58:06

kids a little older And they didn't live like

58:08

exceptionally long, but yeah, but yeah,

58:10

it's kind of weird. Yeah, I don't I did

58:13

have a

58:13

I did have a great uncle who?

58:16

died maybe like Five

58:18

four or five years ago. He was like 92 so he

58:21

was like

58:22

you know he would have been with it. Oh,

58:24

yeah Yeah, yeah, he was with it. Yeah I

58:29

Lorenzo isn't here either what the fuck?

58:32

Yeah, I gotta I gotta send people like calendar invites

58:35

or something. It's a time zone that always fucks

58:37

him up They always do it the wrong way. Yeah, why?

58:41

Healthcare employees hey dick don't read my email

58:44

address out loud

58:45

call me Mondays, okay, Mondays

58:48

Don't be likes Mondays Uh I was listening

58:51

to this week's show where you were talking about health

58:53

care at the health care industry and how 90% of people And

58:55

most jobs aren't working. I

58:58

would say that's probably 80 to 90 percent of people

59:00

in every job are not doing anything I mean

59:02

not they're not they're certainly not working all day Yeah,

59:05

they're not working all day I

59:08

think you hide the more people you hire the more people it takes

59:10

to do a job. Yeah. Yeah, right For

59:14

anything I got I really got a buckle down

59:16

and try to figure out an action item plan

59:18

for this like okay So you don't do anything if everyone's

59:21

responsible. No one's responsible. Yeah, that

59:23

works Well, I wanted to email you and

59:25

tell you you're right I work for one

59:27

of the biggest health insurance companies in the

59:29

world and half of what we do is a joke I'm

59:32

gonna say higher than that Sure

59:35

Last week my team spent our weekly

59:37

meeting time to teach a bunch of boomers

59:40

how to make 3d avatars for Microsoft

59:42

Teams Wow You

59:45

spend more time learning like

59:48

Teams or slack or yeah,

59:50

like it's all all the shit off the

59:53

communication stuff the internal communication

59:55

stuff I can't even tell me Disney's like that all

59:57

the time. It's all about yeah do

1:00:00

any work they just

1:00:02

learn how to talk to each other you guys

1:00:04

have a telegram channel you get on no wild

1:00:07

use emails I can categorize

1:00:09

emails into many different tagging

1:00:11

system yeah yeah yeah a lot of software

1:00:13

exists to sort it stop stop turning everything

1:00:16

into a group chat it is

1:00:18

meetings about meetings and you know the

1:00:20

worst part is that Microsoft Teams even puts

1:00:22

that out because they had a meeting and said well

1:00:24

we need really need is like a me

1:00:26

like a 3d avatar yeah

1:00:28

all right man some fucking woman right

1:00:31

you hit a critical mass of women in anything

1:00:35

and it's immediately destroyed oh

1:00:42

I just know that when that happens

1:00:44

there's just a lot of talking

1:00:46

and it drives me crazy I don't

1:00:50

know how I don't know

1:00:52

how one woman can do the talking

1:00:55

of at least a hundred men but they

1:00:57

seem to all be able to do it remarkable

1:01:00

I just go I

1:01:03

can't even I get overwhelmed like it's

1:01:05

like it's like I get like like shell

1:01:07

shock yeah my central nervous system

1:01:09

just shuts down and I just yeah I

1:01:11

just hear blow and just they're just bouncing

1:01:13

off of me and my yeah

1:01:16

yeah it's like crazy you like tonight is

1:01:19

after a you know concussive explosion right

1:01:21

that everybody hates it like god I hate that

1:01:23

fucking frequency yeah I just

1:01:25

see Elliot Roger in my eyes yeah

1:01:29

yeah getting closer and closer yeah

1:01:31

yeah

1:01:34

instead of actually discussing worker productivity

1:01:36

or management so imagine

1:01:39

me the youngest person on my team

1:01:41

watching a bunch of 40 to 50 year olds

1:01:43

laugh like special ed children watching

1:01:46

their sadly those are not boomers those are

1:01:48

me yeah

1:01:51

they're just as bad man I gotta play you this thing

1:01:53

this woman

1:01:57

hot girl

1:01:58

yeah So

1:02:02

this hot girl is

1:02:04

crying about how

1:02:07

the commute to her work like horrible.

1:02:10

Yeah, it's annoying.

1:02:11

But this is

1:02:13

my first job, like my first time to five job

1:02:15

after college and I'm in person and

1:02:18

I'm commuting in the city and it takes me fucking

1:02:20

forever to get there. There's

1:02:22

no way I'm going to be able to afford living in the city

1:02:24

right now. So that's off the table like fucking.

1:02:27

If I was able to walk to work and it would be fine, but

1:02:29

I'm not. So it literally takes me like I leave

1:02:31

here like I get on the train at seven thirty and

1:02:34

I don't get home till like six fifteen

1:02:36

earliest and then like I don't have time

1:02:38

to do anything. I don't I want to shower, eat my dinner and go to

1:02:40

sleep. I don't

1:02:42

have time or energy to cook by dinner either.

1:02:45

Like I don't have energy to work out like that's

1:02:47

out the window. Like

1:02:49

I'm so upset.

1:02:51

Nothing to do with my job at all,

1:02:54

but just like the nine to five schedule in general

1:02:56

is crazy. Being in the office, like it

1:02:58

was remote. You get off at five and you're home and everything's

1:03:00

fine. But like I'm not

1:03:02

home. It takes me

1:03:05

to get home and like like

1:03:07

people that drive to the office like it doesn't you don't get off

1:03:09

at five. And I know it could be worse.

1:03:12

I know I could be working longer, but like I literally get

1:03:14

off its pitch black. Like I don't

1:03:16

have

1:03:16

any time to like meet.

1:03:18

Like

1:03:22

I don't know. Like how do you feel for like dating? Like

1:03:25

I don't have time for anything. And I'm like so

1:03:27

stressed out and I'm also getting my period. So that's my emotional.

1:03:31

But like am I so dramatic?

1:03:33

That's why. So

1:03:36

this happened in like that's yeah.

1:03:39

There is just the response was

1:03:42

overwhelmingly. Well yeah. Welcome

1:03:45

to the world sweetheart. Like this next generation

1:03:47

isn't prepared for life. Like you guys

1:03:50

driving just drive commuting for

1:03:53

two hours every day is a total

1:03:55

waste of time. Oh my God to mention that nothing

1:03:58

you guys do is important or matter. at

1:04:00

all it doesn't like you could most

1:04:03

people could just not work it

1:04:05

would be fine it doesn't have to be like

1:04:07

it is but they're like it doesn't totally

1:04:10

right yeah he's fucking a nightmare

1:04:12

she's so no she's totally right but it like it

1:04:14

and then at the same time I like you know my

1:04:17

fucking old ass goes what the fuck you

1:04:19

think I've been doing my whole fucking life and

1:04:21

that's why are you better but it's like that's

1:04:23

the answer all these people it should be better

1:04:27

it's yeah we shouldn't have to look

1:04:30

America America works in commuting America

1:04:32

work more than anybody to get

1:04:35

nothing yeah to get fucking nothing

1:04:37

to find bombs to kill him uh

1:04:41

it's such a fucking scam and they indoctrinate

1:04:44

you it's like

1:04:46

you you're never gonna move up in the fucking

1:04:48

corporate giant if you don't do it

1:04:50

extra you're supposed to do extra on your fucking

1:04:53

diet for free so you have a chance to

1:04:55

move up it's like no what about if you're just

1:04:57

good at the job that gave me for the commute actually

1:05:00

what if you're just a good way you're not your job description

1:05:03

you do what you're paid to do really well

1:05:05

let me give you an opportunity no no you got to go but you got

1:05:08

to do extra work for free

1:05:10

to really show people and yeah

1:05:13

it's no we are completely and oddly right

1:05:15

but we're all fucking company

1:05:18

men they make you that way and meanwhile

1:05:20

they don't give a fuck they

1:05:22

would fucking Bob Iger from

1:05:26

Disney would fucking would murder

1:05:28

you and rape your corpse to

1:05:30

make fucking the stock go up

1:05:32

a fucking yeah point yeah

1:05:35

give me a fucking break like it's like

1:05:37

I get I get what she's saying

1:05:40

there's no thing

1:05:44

there's no like this what's the point

1:05:46

of this there's no like retirement all

1:05:48

my money gets taken away there's no

1:05:50

fucking point of this America

1:05:53

is it we're circling the drain it

1:05:55

movie may circle for a while but this

1:05:57

country is fucking on fuck

1:05:59

it's done No, it's absolutely done. That's

1:06:01

I think that's why I love the free Palestine

1:06:04

thing so much now I just get to sit

1:06:06

back like uh-huh. Wow. It

1:06:08

got so bad You guys lost your little country

1:06:10

over there didn't you lost your fucking money laundering

1:06:12

country? Yeah, that's too bad. Yeah This

1:06:15

country

1:06:15

had a very brief

1:06:18

very brief, you know Stay

1:06:21

at the at the summit. Yeah now it's

1:06:23

fucking snowballing down the other side You

1:06:26

know all these VC guys

1:06:28

are like they're all using this video

1:06:31

as an opportunity to like

1:06:33

To imply how hard they have worked.

1:06:35

Yeah, I know welcome to the world I was like you're

1:06:38

saying that because you because you didn't

1:06:40

want credit well and well because

1:06:42

you didn't get paid for it Well, and also like

1:06:44

mothers now, they're always like, oh, it's such a hard job Yeah,

1:06:46

cuz you didn't really get anything for it. You keep

1:06:49

fucking saying it. Well in misery loves company

1:06:51

It's like if I had to do it, you should have to

1:06:53

suffer. Yeah, like it's yeah exactly people

1:06:56

are worried that They're

1:06:58

gonna find a you know that they might find

1:07:00

a loophole or something and actually have balance

1:07:02

in their life Hey, yeah, don't worry.

1:07:04

They won't They're gonna be

1:07:07

just as miserable as I am And

1:07:15

all this stuff like we're gonna

1:07:17

die drugs will still be illegal

1:07:19

there will still be a 40-hour workweek.

1:07:21

Oh, yeah Absolutely, you know, well

1:07:23

no Technology technology improves.

1:07:26

Yeah, you should we should all work less

1:07:28

and have more money, right? But no look

1:07:30

at this graph You know actually we're almost as much

1:07:32

as our as a previous generations like

1:07:35

that. That's bad Yeah, that means all that that

1:07:37

means all the productivity that comes as a result

1:07:39

of technology being siphoned off Right and

1:07:41

actually they're kind of taking too much right because

1:07:43

they're like all that money is

1:07:45

going somewhere hundred percent It's going into

1:07:47

financial instruments. Yeah, not not

1:07:49

not to the workers not to anybody who's doing it and

1:07:52

Islam kind of has this thing against usury.

1:07:54

I don't know if you knew that they're not allowed

1:07:57

to charge you serious rates. So

1:07:59

I didn't know that. Maybe we get together with the free

1:08:02

Palestine people because they're obviously going to be in control

1:08:04

in 20 years and say, guys,

1:08:06

you know, you got to keep this eight

1:08:09

percent mortgage. That's ridiculous.

1:08:11

Yeah, that's ridiculous. Yeah.

1:08:14

Yeah. Should be in line with inflation. How

1:08:16

is inflation? Nothing's ever been in line with inflation over the last

1:08:19

fucking five decades. If we're

1:08:21

going to have inflation, then that's the mortgage

1:08:23

rate. Yeah. You're not making money off

1:08:25

people having houses. Are you?

1:08:28

Uh, okay. Well,

1:08:31

I wanted to email you. You're right. So imagine

1:08:34

me, the youngest person on my team, watching

1:08:36

a bunch of 40 to 50 year olds laugh like special ed

1:08:38

children, watching their 3D

1:08:40

bitmojis do shitty hand wave animations.

1:08:43

But you got to commute for that. You can't sit at home

1:08:45

watching a bitmoji do a hand wave.

1:08:49

And seeing the dumbest people you'll ever meet in

1:08:51

your life giggling at it. Children.

1:08:55

Uh, did fuck did fucking Lord

1:08:57

miles get nabbed by the Taliban? Maybe

1:08:59

he did. Oh, because of how retarded

1:09:01

it all was.

1:09:02

I didn't make one and just pretended I was having

1:09:05

PC issues. Nice.

1:09:07

Uh, so the assistant manager reached out to

1:09:09

me afterwards and started hounding me to waste more

1:09:12

work time to make this stupid thing. Oh,

1:09:15

the mandatory like team building

1:09:17

projects or something like that. You got to get

1:09:20

your emoji up there, buddy. Yeah.

1:09:22

Come on. Like

1:09:25

team leaders tend to say things like, Hey,

1:09:28

does anybody want to volunteer for, you know,

1:09:31

like this extra work? Like it's like,

1:09:33

yeah, like, you know, it needs just to sign

1:09:35

it to somebody. Yeah. If you got a team full

1:09:37

of like graphic artists or something like that, it's

1:09:40

like, Hey, does anybody is it? Does anybody want

1:09:42

to take on it's like, Hey, you should

1:09:44

know what everybody's working on. If you're working

1:09:46

on like, say different shows or sign it graphics

1:09:49

or something like that, just assign it. That's

1:09:52

your job. Hey,

1:09:55

so-and-so's light over there. Okay. Give

1:09:57

it to them. Yeah. Does anybody?

1:10:00

like because people are are are

1:10:02

taught to

1:10:03

go after those brownie points so maybe they

1:10:05

can get a you know a senior

1:10:08

designer title or a buy-in

1:10:10

from everybody you know I want you to be invested if

1:10:12

this sounds like something you need to fucking

1:10:15

assign it dude. Fucking

1:10:17

stop. It's so why do we have

1:10:19

to have women in the workplace and why did why

1:10:21

did this has to have to happen and every once

1:10:23

in a while every once in a while

1:10:25

you will run into somebody who's older

1:10:28

than 30 who still buys into

1:10:30

that yeah oh you poor

1:10:32

stupid bastard

1:10:35

you really you or you've been

1:10:37

in this so long you've

1:10:39

you've actually you maybe

1:10:41

maybe you realized it was bullshit and now

1:10:43

you're like I'm stuck so just out

1:10:45

of self-preservation you're like I

1:10:48

buy it and they do it's the bits it's

1:10:51

it's Winston he loved Big

1:10:53

Brother at the end of 1984 okay it was

1:10:56

all okay I love Big Brother community

1:10:58

yeah welcome to the world yeah is that

1:11:00

the world yeah

1:11:02

fucking driving two hours a day for no

1:11:04

reason yep you finally something

1:11:06

inside you brought four hours you finally

1:11:09

broke I just drive all fucking day then yeah

1:11:12

on top of all that last year my entire

1:11:14

department had to spend three full work

1:11:16

days to learn a new social

1:11:18

media program for the company no one used

1:11:20

it and it was removed from the system a month later

1:11:22

it's all such a fucking joke yeah Obamacare

1:11:25

did that

1:11:26

Obamacare made it so the

1:11:28

administrative costs for health insurance yeah

1:11:30

sure went from like three times the

1:11:33

amount like the doctors are the only ones doing anything

1:11:35

be yeah everything else is just record-keeping for

1:11:38

money yeah you can get raped for being

1:11:40

cured yeah yeah

1:11:42

Obamacare said okay well we were gonna need about

1:11:45

ten times the amount of minute yeah

1:11:47

sure

1:11:49

to take people's money uh-huh

1:11:51

no new doctors of

1:11:53

course right I just make them no

1:11:55

that's right too

1:11:58

long didn't read insurance companies

1:11:59

scam and 80% of the employees yeah could

1:12:02

be fired

1:12:03

with no noticeable change in production. Yeah. Yeah.

1:12:06

Well, you're not producing anything Thanks to go fuck

1:12:08

yourself money

1:12:10

Much smooches. Hey Sean. Fuck

1:12:12

you dick. I just wanted to say I love the show I

1:12:14

found you guys to be official podcast and y'all

1:12:16

took over my favorite podcast slot

1:12:18

very soon. Thank you Yeah, very high

1:12:21

energy show. Have you listen to other shows? Do we

1:12:23

have a higher other shows there's just

1:12:25

like mumbling and yeah there Yeah,

1:12:30

I don't know. I don't listen to other shows you should

1:12:32

go figure and they're all trash You

1:12:35

know what I saw last night what I

1:12:37

know a bunch of Israelis. Yeah, so, you

1:12:39

know, I'm like, yeah Um, I

1:12:42

saw this girl

1:12:43

She was giving her opinion on Israel

1:12:46

Palestine.

1:12:47

Yeah, I shit you not she pulled one of these. Yeah.

1:12:49

Yeah, you know, it really sucks This is crazy

1:12:52

was having Israel's fucking horrible right a horrible

1:12:54

horrible Cuz I know like I've been to

1:12:56

music festivals in yeah, I know. Yeah,

1:12:58

I know People who probably

1:13:00

know people got get napped. Yeah, maybe Then

1:13:03

she pulls one of these Really

1:13:08

yeah, I'm like is she about to tell a black joke right

1:13:10

right the fuck I've never seen this. Yeah

1:13:12

from One of you live

1:13:15

super liberals number one. Yeah, also in

1:13:17

real life. I've never seen that. Yeah, not as wait

1:13:19

Where did you see her? That's

1:13:21

party. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah,

1:13:24

he gets one of these over the left shoulder long look

1:13:26

over the right shoulder long Look, wow, this is

1:13:28

gonna be like Jews. They're all

1:13:30

Jews. Yeah, she goes But

1:13:33

are we just gonna ignore that? 7000 Palestinians

1:13:37

are getting killed.

1:13:38

Yeah, right that they

1:13:40

that's not okay Yeah, I

1:13:43

know. Well, I mean, okay I

1:13:45

mean the the standpoint of these look

1:13:47

over shoulder look over shoulder

1:13:50

Ignore that You

1:13:54

can't say that one side is 100% right like

1:13:56

it that's

1:13:59

I mean, the Gaza Strip

1:14:02

is essentially an open air prison

1:14:04

camp. Is it? I mean, it

1:14:06

has been for it forever. Brought

1:14:09

it off there, Internet. Dude, you

1:14:11

know how Gaza's

1:14:14

prison is fucked. Yeah.

1:14:17

But the whole West Bank, do you know how

1:14:19

many like military checkpoints

1:14:22

Palestinians have to go through every day to

1:14:24

like get to and from work? It's

1:14:26

like military. They're under military

1:14:28

control. They can't have like gatherings

1:14:31

of groups. It's the kind of shit for

1:14:33

you. Like, wouldn't

1:14:36

that make people maybe harbor

1:14:38

some resentment? And people who are

1:14:40

like, oh, I have no, I have like,

1:14:43

you know, there's people there like I have

1:14:45

no inclination to commit violence. I'm

1:14:47

just trying to like get through my day, but

1:14:50

they're making it so fucking difficult. Yeah. It's

1:14:55

honestly weird. It's weird to imagine

1:14:57

somebody who doesn't think that

1:15:01

terrorism is justified. But it's like, terror

1:15:03

is not justified. You're fucking they

1:15:05

shut off their electricity. Pretty pissed off somebody. If

1:15:08

AT&T shut off my Internet,

1:15:11

I would fill a truck with fertilizer

1:15:13

and just and just drive it

1:15:15

to the nearest building. People cutting off my

1:15:18

Internet. Are

1:15:20

you kidding me? I think there's such

1:15:23

a lack of self-awareness of a lot of

1:15:25

people in this country. I

1:15:27

think it would be they would be blown

1:15:29

away by how by

1:15:32

how people would react. Burned

1:15:34

cities down because one black guy got killed.

1:15:36

But everybody turns into one. One.

1:15:40

Everybody will turn into a Karen in like

1:15:42

two fucking days of the right thing being

1:15:45

taken away. They have no

1:15:47

idea what people in other countries

1:15:49

fucking go through. This country is built

1:15:52

on a tax

1:15:53

being enough to murder

1:15:56

everybody.

1:15:56

Yeah. You think like British

1:15:58

loyalists had a great time. During that revolution.

1:16:01

Well, I mean, yeah, I kind of like England

1:16:03

all my family's there. My bodies are there

1:16:06

I can't what you saying about the taxes thing,

1:16:08

but I don't know like what we're touring and

1:16:10

feathering you bro. Yeah. Yeah

1:16:13

Okay

1:16:17

Oh Yeah

1:16:19

favorite podcast I've gone back and started

1:16:22

from the beginning on my long days at work at

1:16:24

a manufacturing plant

1:16:26

Hmm wonder what he's manufacturing Widgets

1:16:29

Honestly makes my day or infuriates

1:16:32

me listening to your wild takes

1:16:34

but at the end of the day gets me through it Fuck

1:16:36

you dick. Right is for Sean. Keep it up. Thanks

1:16:39

for not killing yourselves. Thank you.

1:16:41

Ray. Thank you trade

1:16:44

Tuber hey dick check

1:16:46

out this gravy seal session run amok.

1:16:49

All right See who's

1:16:51

crying somebody's crying. Oh Oh

1:16:55

God you

1:16:56

guys just need to do drugs. You don't need to get together

1:16:59

and yell at each other

1:17:03

Boy,

1:17:05

okay

1:17:07

Did it do

1:17:11

This is the most cringy thing I've seen a long time

1:17:13

the instructors and

1:17:15

the dudes that are paid to be here Okay, so this

1:17:18

is a gravy seals thing. Yep I

1:17:34

Think over like a backpack so all the

1:17:36

guys all these gravy seals

1:17:38

I'm sure that instructor was like definitely like military,

1:17:41

you know, he actually knows what's up, right? No, yeah, no, no

1:17:44

I mean what being in the military would

1:17:46

he not a shout of people and be gay is even

1:17:49

like it He's

1:17:51

wearing a shirt. So he's higher status.

1:17:53

Yeah, these guys are wearing Purses

1:17:56

is so retarded military purses. Yeah

1:18:00

Is that a satchel maybe no when

1:18:02

they're wearing it okay? Yeah, they've got

1:18:05

ice baths probably right and

1:18:07

they're putting their purses Next

1:18:10

to the ice baths and the instructors flipping

1:18:12

out on this guy. Yeah, cuz he's

1:18:14

taking his purse is that right? Oh

1:18:37

Just

1:18:45

not just like stomp that guy into pudding like

1:18:47

as a group Like because

1:18:49

they because they're pathetic right like why would

1:18:51

they join you just answered it? Yeah answered

1:18:54

it Yeah, we all do respect like

1:18:56

dude. You know yeah You don't have to say

1:18:58

that like you know I said it in the military. He you

1:19:00

don't have to be there either That's

1:19:02

yeah, you know you're looking if you're looking for

1:19:05

answers. You've come to the wrong place You're

1:19:07

looking for a dad. You gotta look

1:19:09

you gotta look somewhere else man. He's gone Well,

1:19:11

they're like this is this is how they were treated

1:19:13

growing up So like they're

1:19:15

just saying why a mom don't think

1:19:17

these guys had dad. Yeah, well right,

1:19:20

but it's by somebody Yeah by somebody somebody

1:19:22

and like that's you know

1:19:24

There's the Dad is a very

1:19:26

one in the back the very real psychological

1:19:29

concept of When you grow

1:19:31

up with trauma mm-hmm you

1:19:34

as an adult if you're not aware of it You seek

1:19:36

it out and then attempt to master it.

1:19:39

This is the this is the abused.

1:19:41

This is the stripper right? Abuse

1:19:44

sexual abuse like how big are her tits? What are

1:19:46

you? Whatever big you want to be? So

1:19:49

it's like you seek out that abuse Yeah,

1:19:52

I'm trying to master it by like you know Do you stupid fucking

1:19:54

men like I can I just make you I make them cough

1:19:56

up all the money But it's like it only hurts

1:19:58

you It only hurts you doing

1:20:01

that, the stripper, yeah. Oh no, you gotta use like a man,

1:20:03

you gotta use a male example. There

1:20:05

you go. Women don't think like that. Some of them got

1:20:07

huge tits. Oh yeah, that's true. Yeah, it's

1:20:10

the same fucking thing.

1:20:11

What a stupid phenomenon.

1:20:14

Yeah, but it's what people

1:20:16

do. Do they have like a certification

1:20:18

system? It's what they think they deserve. They

1:20:20

do. Right, that's what I mean.

1:20:24

And they do because they think they do.

1:20:27

Yeah, I mean I'm saying that they do also.

1:20:30

Oh, can I just, with all due respect,

1:20:33

Yo, what? You talk to people like that? What the

1:20:35

fuck's wrong with you? And

1:20:37

that's the, you know, what the- They

1:20:39

don't understand. They don't understand. They don't

1:20:42

fucking understand what's going on.

1:20:44

No, they don't.

1:20:46

Do they have like, do they

1:20:48

train so much in the gravy seals program

1:20:50

that they go on to be their own instructors? And they're

1:20:53

like, I trained with- Maybe. I

1:20:55

list like kung fu masters. You

1:20:57

know, I trained with hip man for a while.

1:20:59

I was fucking King Chow and Dong Hui. So

1:21:03

I'm like an expert. I got yelled at

1:21:05

by fucking Sleepiest the molester.

1:21:10

By the fucking American Don, like all

1:21:12

these stupid things. Like, oh wow, there's a great pedigree

1:21:15

of yelling at fatherless men. I bunked

1:21:17

with Lucretius the dog fucker. Right,

1:21:21

I'm on a telegram chat.

1:21:23

Yeah. I was on a telegram chat with all

1:21:25

the ROTC boys. Okay.

1:21:29

Not revenge of the sis,

1:21:31

like

1:21:32

high school ROTC. Stryle

1:21:35

says, Dick, I was at Disney world and I was

1:21:37

eating at the very fancy BR

1:21:39

guest restaurant when a very handsome man

1:21:41

passed my table and he went to

1:21:44

sit with his family. My eyes

1:21:46

perked up and I immediately said to my beautiful

1:21:48

wife who has double D cups, wow, great.

1:21:51

Is that Sean? My wife seemed confused. She's

1:21:53

not interested from the Dick show. No way. And

1:21:55

he is now behind me seated with his family. Why does

1:21:58

he keep talking about your family? bunch

1:22:00

of people I didn't know that well. Why is he

1:22:02

said it twice now? Yeah. Uh,

1:22:04

she says, I don't know, but it definitely could have been

1:22:06

his twin. Maybe he did. Were

1:22:09

you at that restaurant? Was it the, our guest restaurant?

1:22:11

I don't know if that's what it was called, but it was like a gay,

1:22:14

be our guest restaurant. It was a Disney world. I

1:22:17

did eat at the, at the beauty and the beast

1:22:19

castle. Yeah. It

1:22:21

was in your mind. You didn't connect the

1:22:24

two. Well, no, I didn't. I couldn't remember what it was. People

1:22:26

were just calling it a certain thing. Yeah. The

1:22:28

reserve went down and they, you get

1:22:31

the stock home buffet. Yeah.

1:22:34

It was of course very overpriced

1:22:36

and not really all that good. Yeah.

1:22:39

The fucking Jack Daniels, the Jack Daniels

1:22:41

bar buffet for $70

1:22:44

did not disappoint in the quality,

1:22:46

the Jack Daniels quality brand. Yeah. That's

1:22:48

so funny. That's so funny.

1:22:51

So we spend 300 bucks

1:22:53

on the buffet, right? Yeah. Girlfriends,

1:22:55

everything costs a double what it should. Yeah. So

1:22:58

we're like packing in as meat, this

1:23:00

crummy meat. Yeah. Cause you don't

1:23:02

want to waste your, because for some reason not

1:23:04

eating feels like wasting money. Right. Even

1:23:07

though it's the same, no matter what. So in the whole rest of the show, I got

1:23:09

a fucking gut full of meat

1:23:11

and shitty like potatoes

1:23:14

and whatever buffet food. And

1:23:16

I can't have any popcorn. The drinks

1:23:18

aren't really working. It's really, Jack

1:23:20

Daniels really ruined my, really

1:23:23

ruined my night. I

1:23:27

hadn't listened to the newest episode where you said he was

1:23:29

at Disney world yet.

1:23:31

I was saving it for the airplane ride back home. Every

1:23:34

few minutes I'd do this one 80 degree turn

1:23:36

and try to convince myself that was Sean and to go

1:23:39

up and ask, but I didn't want to disturb his

1:23:41

family time. None

1:23:43

of those people is my family.

1:23:46

Man. That's what happens when your girlfriend

1:23:49

plays in a man something and drags

1:23:51

you along with, I

1:23:54

can't believe you did that. There was one, well,

1:23:56

I, but see, I was only there for three. I, I

1:23:58

was like, I will do three. Three days

1:24:01

of Disney opening offer.

1:24:03

Oh there she was there like oh, she's got

1:24:05

back last night. Oh You

1:24:07

the Disney world the whole time yeah? To

1:24:11

what yeah well see but then

1:24:13

the thing is like I'm like

1:24:15

I'm not paying for this like

1:24:19

that

1:24:21

If you want me to do stuff you're

1:24:23

paying for this and see like a gigolo you're

1:24:25

paying Oh, that's because

1:24:28

I set expectations right from the get-go.

1:24:30

Oh, do not have expectations of

1:24:33

me I think everything is stupid,

1:24:35

and I don't want to do anything So

1:24:37

it's like yeah, what about Disney

1:24:39

world surely you want to do that for a week What

1:24:41

do you mean another step stom but not if

1:24:43

I have to I mean I I work for my bill

1:24:46

and but we're I don't Get paid vacation.

1:24:48

I don't you know and she's you

1:24:50

know she works for a you know she works

1:24:52

for a Disney company So everything you know

1:24:54

like I mean you know all that kind of stuff is Or

1:24:58

massive discounts But

1:25:00

not like they used to be but still pretty

1:25:02

good. I mean yeah, but but

1:25:05

yeah, yeah Yeah, so I got you know look

1:25:08

if I'm with my family. That's when I want

1:25:10

to be bothered the most right Okay,

1:25:12

save me see me, and there's

1:25:14

a woman there Interrupt yeah,

1:25:17

please

1:25:18

whatever you do

1:25:19

We were yeah, don't fuck me over. We were

1:25:22

with one one person who

1:25:24

is the most annoying person on earth? Piss

1:25:32

everybody off Wow

1:25:35

just being just fringy annoying

1:25:37

like fucking nice stunted

1:25:41

I don't know. It's a weird is a weird group Yeah,

1:25:46

you think weird group No

1:25:52

Well

1:25:53

weird group as I'm boarding the plane right now

1:25:55

was pretty great though because his wife couldn't fit

1:25:57

on a couple rides

1:25:59

And we got

1:26:02

we got light we got lightning passes out of it.

1:26:04

Oh Yeah,

1:26:07

whoo Thunder pass.

1:26:09

Yeah. Yeah Couldn't

1:26:11

ride the fucking dragon in avatar I'm

1:26:20

on the plane home to send us email to you so

1:26:22

I could apologize to Sean for being weird

1:26:25

at Be our guest and not just

1:26:27

saying hi.

1:26:28

Well, it's not weird to not say hi to

1:26:30

somebody. I Well,

1:26:31

yeah, I didn't know he was a you wouldn't know I

1:26:33

knew what you're doing If if anybody ever

1:26:36

sees me out in the wild, please do

1:26:38

come up. Yeah, please I honestly

1:26:40

like I'm not my block off There's no tell me

1:26:42

what I'm not. No, I want I

1:26:45

get the biggest fucking kick out of that if

1:26:47

it happens Oh, well and the people

1:26:49

you're with like wow look like you're better than me.

1:26:51

I didn't know I didn't that's Definitely. I think

1:26:54

a little bit of it. Yeah, you say I think we're the same but

1:26:56

now that I see a person You don't know it's

1:26:59

nothing. It's nothing. Don't worry, you know, you get to do them twice

1:27:01

I like it. Do you saw dirty rotten scoundrels, right? Yeah,

1:27:04

like when you know, so he's like, oh your

1:27:06

majesty or your your Excellent, you know, whatever it's

1:27:08

like, you know nothing. Well,

1:27:11

you must be really important. We overdo it Yeah,

1:27:13

like say stuff like I was gonna kill myself And

1:27:16

I was I had a gun in my mouth and I was listening to your show

1:27:18

and really brought me out of it and like

1:27:20

Yeah, right. Right, right. I used to molest

1:27:23

my kids and then you show made me stop stuff like

1:27:25

that It's turned molesting other people's kids. I've must

1:27:27

have got other people's kids now. I'm gonna kick the habit.

1:27:29

Yeah Yeah, it's like you can't it cold turkey

1:27:31

is a tough way to go. But you could die.

1:27:34

Yeah withdraws you could yeah In

1:27:37

all seriousness, I I will never

1:27:39

I will never feel bothered

1:27:42

If that's a baby, you

1:27:44

know, what's the worst you

1:27:46

get embarrassed and it's not me Yeah, you

1:27:50

know what I mean like that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, like I'm

1:27:52

pretty recognizable. I won't embarrass

1:27:54

you Uh, I just assumed you

1:27:56

Californians would stick to Disneyland and

1:27:58

not make your way out east He didn't even know you were there you

1:28:01

just saw yeah, that's funny. That's

1:28:03

five abs that was absent that had to be

1:28:05

me I hope Sean's $80 steak was

1:28:07

nice Hope he also

1:28:09

enjoyed being crushed in for the fireworks

1:28:11

show You know I

1:28:14

went back to the hotel for the fireworks show Wow

1:28:18

you really weren't into it Driving

1:28:22

them out of here because go back to the room.

1:28:24

Yeah. Yeah feeling fuck this. There's

1:28:26

a big one at Epcot Two

1:28:29

and I took off because there you go

1:28:31

the sky buckets or the skyways whatever they call

1:28:34

them there Yeah, they're like you know

1:28:36

they can take you right back to the hotel I was staying at

1:28:38

so I was like like a like an airborne tram

1:28:42

Yeah, you remember this the skyways at Disneyland

1:28:44

right your little boxes that you get in little

1:28:47

buckets Well, they have like you know their bigger bucket. They

1:28:49

go hotel. Yeah Wow that

1:28:51

cool one of the hotels I mean it depends

1:28:53

where you're at, but they have them all over the place But yeah, you take

1:28:55

the the monorail from some hotels You can take

1:28:57

the sky buckets or sky whatever

1:29:00

you call it from other hotels. Yeah,

1:29:02

it was great You can take right from where I was

1:29:04

to right to Epcot and

1:29:06

back Caught is badass

1:29:09

like it's awesome. It's like every fucking

1:29:11

different country

1:29:13

You know in there, and it's like

1:29:15

People from that country other ones

1:29:17

cooking they're using oh yeah, I remember that

1:29:20

Amazing fucking place and they

1:29:22

got I'll tell you one thing There's a new

1:29:25

Guardians of the galaxy roller coaster there fucking

1:29:28

phenomenal I think it opened like a month ago. I

1:29:30

did oh no and some of the rides are amazing

1:29:33

yeah,

1:29:34

and I like the animal park

1:29:35

Dude you go out there.

1:29:37

There's literally like you know lions and fucking

1:29:40

shit in the wild African elephants You

1:29:42

know they could come right up and kill you if they wanted to really

1:29:45

yeah, no. There's no fences. Yeah, yep

1:29:48

Can't believe I blew a chance to give him real-life smooches

1:29:51

well not do that and then for the record this was Monday

1:29:53

That's what I believe you I was sitting Should

1:29:57

have sent him a sent him some bread Yeah,

1:30:00

right for the general diet coke for the gentleman, right?

1:30:02

Right, right, right. Yep.

1:30:04

That,

1:30:05

that, okay. Yeah. We've established. It's

1:30:08

me.

1:30:08

Johnny prolapse says, Hey, Dick, I'm pretty much done

1:30:11

caring about anything in the world. Yeah. Oh,

1:30:14

thank you. Wow. I got a whole selection

1:30:16

today. Look at you. Maybe I'm

1:30:18

just selfish, but caring about

1:30:20

the major problems of the world is too much

1:30:23

for one guy like me to take. Uh,

1:30:26

yeah, you can, uh, it

1:30:28

doesn't really matter if you care, don't care. It takes

1:30:30

it. It takes it out of you. You can only care

1:30:32

about what, you know, it's, you gotta, you gotta

1:30:34

make your own way in the age of anxiety. You're

1:30:36

trained to be hit with,

1:30:39

with, uh, with,

1:30:42

um, worrisome things all

1:30:44

the time. Yep. So you don't have time to think about your

1:30:46

own shit because the, the we're primed to worry

1:30:48

constantly. I'd rather just be apathetic to everything

1:30:51

outside my bubble for the rest of my life

1:30:53

and focus on what's in front of me. Yeah, you should. Yeah.

1:30:55

And it's got, that's actually a healthy

1:30:58

self preservation technique.

1:31:00

You're supposed to, doesn't mean you're weak because

1:31:02

you don't care about the plight of African children

1:31:05

or because it, yeah, nobody really cares

1:31:08

about what's going on in Israel and Palestine. And

1:31:10

for Israelis,

1:31:11

no, but you can family and friends there. I'm

1:31:13

really, I talked to a guy, but you can

1:31:15

take in the, you can take in all the bad aspects

1:31:18

of that. You can hurt yourself by, by,

1:31:21

by taking in part of it. You

1:31:23

know, it's too big a thing for you

1:31:25

to really care, but you can, you can

1:31:27

internalize all the fucking anxiety that

1:31:29

surrounds it. That's bad for you, dude. It's like

1:31:32

women moving. Like whenever you move

1:31:34

from one place to another, every woman wakes

1:31:36

up in the morning, puts a baseball hat on

1:31:38

and just worries all day. They don't do anything.

1:31:41

They just are worried all day. Like,

1:31:43

you know, you don't have to just be worried all day.

1:31:45

You can just relax. Like,

1:31:47

you're just, this is like an attention seeking

1:31:50

worrying. Oh, I'm so worried about mass shootings.

1:31:52

Like, well, what does that mean? If

1:31:54

you sit around and get amped up and freaked

1:31:56

out all day. Sure, sure. It's never been

1:31:59

easier to do that. You've

1:32:01

got you see we used to have to make shit up to be worried

1:32:03

about like ghosts and shit You've got a million

1:32:06

side little though million sites that'll

1:32:08

tell you you're right and you know what you're

1:32:10

also not worried enough Yeah,

1:32:13

yeah, I'd be more worried. I

1:32:15

don't see how since it's the only realistic

1:32:17

solution I can think of but at the same time the

1:32:20

current US funded wars the environment

1:32:22

which may or may not be going to shit The environment's fine.

1:32:24

Don't worry about it Homelessness.

1:32:27

Well, you're not homeless, right? So

1:32:30

But it's probably easier to become a homeless

1:32:32

now than it was 40 years ago. Mm-hmm On

1:32:36

the huge wave of immigrants could affect everyone's

1:32:38

lives negatively. No Will

1:32:42

it's not could the immigrants are

1:32:44

coming so well everything everything

1:32:47

that's going on is affecting people's Win

1:32:50

I got bad news for you guys And

1:32:52

it's gonna it's phasing out to at the same time.

1:32:54

Yeah, I'm not I'm not doing this shit anymore Yeah,

1:32:57

there's enough stuff to worry about. I don't get to worry about Pretend

1:33:00

stuff, right? If

1:33:03

not soon and later I

1:33:05

Guess I'm just unsure about what the future

1:33:07

has in store for me and everyone else This

1:33:10

feeling of uncertainty or fear of the future

1:33:12

and how I'll handle it has caused me to waste a

1:33:14

lot of time and hide sight But

1:33:16

the feeling is still there as the days pass

1:33:18

any drugs I can take to stop feeling

1:33:21

this way JK

1:33:22

Yeah, no I

1:33:24

hope Sean had a great time at gay Disney World Wait,

1:33:27

this is all the same. No, I was gonna

1:33:30

say yeah Johnny prolapse Johnny

1:33:32

prolapse. Good god It's hard to stop caring

1:33:34

about things takes a lot of work. Yeah, that's a

1:33:36

lot of discipline. Yeah, it does

1:33:39

You know, hey, did you hear about okay?

1:33:42

Yeah, you got to uh, don't care. Yeah Yeah

1:33:45

about that. I do that. That's another way of

1:33:47

me setting expectations Like I you know, my girlfriend's

1:33:50

not really especially like at night like

1:33:52

in bed. She's not allowed to talk to me about

1:33:55

Just about about politics

1:33:58

or current of anything like that where it's Like you

1:34:00

can't, you can't do that. Like I'm on my

1:34:02

mind winding. You can't like, and you know,

1:34:06

it took her a while to get that. Yeah.

1:34:08

And tell it like she understood that I was like really

1:34:11

serious and like tears were shed,

1:34:13

you know, like

1:34:15

where it's, I don't

1:34:17

know what you want from me. Like I'm fucking

1:34:20

that's,

1:34:21

I'm the biggest asshole

1:34:23

in the world when it comes to something like,

1:34:26

like a boundary that I set like

1:34:28

that. Or it's like, you can't, you're just fucking

1:34:30

winding me up. I just called boundaries. You, you.

1:34:33

You're doing this on purpose for you getting off

1:34:36

on it. You can talk to like a therapist about this. Oh

1:34:39

yeah. Yeah. I mean about like, if

1:34:41

you feel the need to like, and vomit

1:34:43

out

1:34:44

what your takes are on what's

1:34:46

going on. Have you heard about, Yeah. It's

1:34:49

like, no, I'm doing what this guy's

1:34:51

talking about, which is the healthy

1:34:53

thing. My brain is full. My

1:34:56

brain is full enough with my own

1:34:58

shit going on. I don't need

1:35:00

to internalize

1:35:03

whatever fucking other injustices

1:35:05

or, or fucking corrupt

1:35:07

cocksucker doing fucking whatever. I

1:35:10

can't care about it. Don't care. It's

1:35:12

too much. And stop. I

1:35:14

resent you for trying to, Don't

1:35:16

make me care about this stuff. Right. Don't be

1:35:18

doing ads for free. Because you're doing it.

1:35:20

You're doing it to vomit out your problems.

1:35:25

So, sorry. I

1:35:27

love the way to put it. Fucking out of patience.

1:35:30

Yeah. Look buddy,

1:35:32

the world's going to get, you know, worse. That's it's

1:35:34

not going to get any better. So don't worry about it. Right.

1:35:37

And you're not, you got to get over the, you

1:35:39

got to get over the, am I an asshole

1:35:41

for not caring about the, Here's the thing.

1:35:44

There's always a, there's always a silver lining. So we're importing

1:35:46

all these, all these terrorists. Maybe

1:35:49

they will take over the government. I'm not

1:35:51

going to do it. Right. So,

1:35:53

you know, we're not going to go start shooting up federal

1:35:56

buildings, but maybe all the immigrants will come in

1:35:58

and say, Hey, you know what?

1:35:59

I think we should.

1:35:59

I'm not gonna burn down the Federal Reserve. Kill

1:36:02

all these banks, what do you think about that? I think that,

1:36:04

you know, I'm not gonna stop you. A lot of people have done

1:36:06

that in other countries. Like, they know how to do

1:36:08

it. Yeah. They know how to do it.

1:36:10

Yeah, exactly. We don't know anybody

1:36:12

who's done that. Right, we don't know anybody

1:36:15

who's done that, you know? We don't have any practical

1:36:18

experience, Dick. Yes, I

1:36:20

can conceptualize. There should be more on

1:36:22

the cutting edge of. Exactly, I can conceptualize

1:36:26

turning a water pipe into a rocket.

1:36:29

Like, I understand all the pieces and the parts, but

1:36:31

I couldn't do it. But if Hamas

1:36:33

is coming in from Mexico, they can

1:36:35

do it. Yeah. You know? Right.

1:36:38

Like, I need some, I got water pipes. I got all

1:36:41

the water pipes. I'm gonna go buy some water pipes, and

1:36:43

then they're gonna be in my yard. And I'm gonna turn

1:36:46

my security cameras off, and if they happen

1:36:48

to, you know, produce some rockets, hmm,

1:36:50

hmm, hmm. It's evolution, it's not my

1:36:52

problem. I don't get paid to have, I

1:36:54

don't get paid to have problems with this, right? That's

1:36:56

right. Let's

1:36:59

do next, I'm gonna tell Lord Miles next week. Oh,

1:37:01

really? Let's do next week.

1:37:04

Let's do next week.

1:37:06

No worries.

1:37:08

Oh, his scheduling person messed up

1:37:11

the time zones. Damn it. All

1:37:14

right, I gotta take a piss. Okay.

1:37:17

And get a Coke. Yeah, do that.

1:37:20

Mm-mm-mm-mm-mm.

1:37:23

La, la, la, la, la, la,

1:37:25

la. No, thank you.

1:37:28

Was the scheduling person a woman? We'll

1:37:30

find out next week, Johnson. Does

1:37:35

anybody have anything?

1:37:39

Talk about, let me see if I have any videos I

1:37:41

can play while Sean's taking a piss. La,

1:37:45

la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la. Come

1:37:47

on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on. There we go.

1:37:54

Oh, gay magic the gathering, that's cool.

1:37:59

Stop.

1:37:59

Johnson stop posting these

1:38:02

horses shitting god damn

1:38:04

it look Every

1:38:07

time I go into the discord It's

1:38:10

some weird AI of a big

1:38:13

of a horse with a swollen belly Shitting

1:38:17

or having pudding all over it

1:38:23

Yeah, Bing is sick Bing is great My

1:38:26

nephew's made sent me a bunch of pictures of a

1:38:28

fat guy with a yellow lab. Let me

1:38:31

see if I can load any of them up

1:38:36

Did it do and

1:38:39

did it do This

1:38:45

asshole sent me

1:38:48

Oh

1:39:01

Yeah,

1:39:03

here we go, okay, let

1:39:06

me email this to myself

1:39:24

I

1:39:33

Do No

1:39:44

This is what my nephews made Using

1:39:48

Bing and they sent this

1:39:50

to me. I don't know why

1:39:57

Even the dog is fat. I

1:39:59

don't know what this what they're trying to say with this

1:40:01

picture.

1:40:07

I don't know what the prompt was that

1:40:09

they used but

1:40:11

it's a

1:40:13

It looks identical to that guy in his underwear

1:40:16

laying sideways and with all the video

1:40:18

game shit all over his mattress or whatever it

1:40:20

is. I think he's got a gun in that picture

1:40:22

too and

1:40:24

then it's that guy wearing

1:40:26

a white t-shirt that's

1:40:28

painted on and

1:40:31

My nephews made this in Bing this

1:40:33

image and they sent it to me.

1:40:39

I don't know what they're trying to say exactly

1:40:41

this just appeared in my

1:40:44

messages. God Fucking

1:40:49

hilarious. I showed them Bing the Bing AI

1:40:52

image maker and then I got home and then

1:40:54

this was waiting for me It's like looking two years

1:40:56

into the future I Really

1:41:00

want to know like you got looks

1:41:02

like it looks like

1:41:04

you and Rick Rubin had a baby Look

1:41:10

at Maddie She's even

1:41:12

cuter Man, that bitch

1:41:14

has not lost any fucking way. How is that

1:41:16

possible?

1:41:18

I don't know limiting her calories

1:41:20

eliminated an entire cup of food

1:41:22

and

1:41:23

she didn't lose any weight What

1:41:25

does she get how much does she get a day? Do

1:41:27

you know how many now she gets two cups two cups

1:41:30

it went down from three? Yeah, we've just been fucking

1:41:32

feeding her so much. I guess I don't know get a

1:41:34

lot of treats. I

1:41:35

Don't think so. I think the problem

1:41:38

is both of us were like we felt bad about cutting

1:41:40

her foods We're both giving her like giant heaping helping

1:41:42

that guy. So yeah, it's probably the same

1:41:45

Let me see if they sent any other ones Can

1:41:48

you believe that what do you think they put in for the prompt

1:41:51

to make it generate this and how many tries

1:41:53

do you think? It took I

1:41:55

could probably probably that's probably the first one fucking

1:41:58

assholes. Yeah. Well, yeah You made them that

1:42:00

way.

1:42:01

No, it isn't anybody else.

1:42:05

Well, I didn't think it would be used on me.

1:42:07

That's yeah. Right. I

1:42:11

gave you a gun so you could defend yourself. Not

1:42:13

not hurt me in the back. Yeah. You

1:42:16

fuckers. He

1:42:19

sent me another one. Look at Maddie fine. He sent

1:42:21

me a bunch of them

1:42:22

all of a fat guy with long hair.

1:42:26

That's

1:42:26

fucking hilarious.

1:42:30

I can't find it.

1:42:33

Maybe I'll ask for some more.

1:42:34

Okay.

1:42:37

Were we doing something before you left? We

1:42:39

were well, we were you were talking about

1:42:42

something. Well, no, you're saying let's do it next week.

1:42:45

Yeah, Lord Miles next week. Anybody

1:42:47

else going in? What about Harris? We got to

1:42:49

look at the bright side if we're importing all these terrorists.

1:42:52

Yeah, maybe you know, what

1:42:54

do terrorists do? They go after government. Terrorists are pretty

1:42:57

fucking good at attack

1:42:59

at do at changing

1:43:01

the status quo. All right. Well, that's

1:43:03

yeah, I'm not gonna I'm not gonna I can't

1:43:06

say I support Hamas right,

1:43:08

but they triggered

1:43:10

Israel into making a series

1:43:13

of PR blunders that has cost them

1:43:15

tremendous amounts of support. It seems

1:43:17

like it right got young people all over

1:43:20

support for Israel is the lowest it's been

1:43:22

in this country. Yeah, even in Israel

1:43:24

in his work for their government.

1:43:26

Because they have their own parties

1:43:28

trying to jockey for power. Right now

1:43:30

the people in Israel like now you fucked

1:43:33

this up. Big bad. Yeah, like we don't want

1:43:35

to ground war in Gaza. Yeah, the

1:43:37

Iron Dome. It's not like a laser like it's

1:43:39

not perfect. Right kind of seems like

1:43:42

if you fuck this up, you got a hundred million

1:43:44

Muslims right over there, right

1:43:47

and they really want to kill us. Yeah,

1:43:49

all right. Yeah, it's not funny for them. Right.

1:43:51

You fucked this up man. Yeah, this whole

1:43:53

like scam to try to

1:43:56

wipe out Gaza and take their gas reserves.

1:43:59

It didn't work. Fucking stop it's

1:44:01

like 30% support a ground invasion now,

1:44:03

and it was 70 like two weeks ago Wow The

1:44:07

posting fucking Voldemort. Yeah lost

1:44:09

if you're resorting to Voldemort you fucking lost You

1:44:12

know Wise words, okay,

1:44:15

let's do this and then we're Thought

1:44:23

we'd have two calls today we ended up having

1:44:25

zero we need a bonus episode

1:44:27

don't we yes We do we do that this week. Yeah,

1:44:30

okay. Yeah, we do Trevor gin

1:44:32

says the back boobs here are astounded.

1:44:35

Oh, I know what this is and what do you think

1:44:37

yeah? size 22

1:44:40

influencer branded perfect

1:44:43

as she stuns

1:44:45

in a backless mini dress is gonna look like zoidberg

1:44:48

yeah, Abbie Bibble is

1:44:50

a plus-size influencer who has thousands

1:44:52

of Instagram followers gotta be Bible isn't

1:44:54

it?

1:44:55

Oh Ashley Bible? Abby

1:44:57

Bible Abby Bible she recently shared

1:45:00

her latest outfit which got quite the reaction

1:45:02

from fans Are they doing that sarcastically

1:45:05

like do they have? The journalists

1:45:07

say the opposite of what they mean like

1:45:10

big fat slob Stuns

1:45:13

in her backless gown I kind of think they

1:45:15

are right

1:45:16

they do that with celebrities, too Yeah, there's bras

1:45:18

and his wife rocks rocks

1:45:20

and stunning outfit. Okay?

1:45:23

Yeah

1:45:25

Video loading great. Thank you. Oh

1:45:27

That

1:45:31

blonde haired beauty swept her tresses

1:45:33

into a sleek bun that looks photoshopped

1:45:36

as fuck right I mean like I guess it's

1:45:38

like hanging down Look

1:45:42

at those tits on her back No,

1:45:46

I mean like it looks fake. It's

1:45:48

probably real, but it doesn't I mean that looks fake

1:45:51

right

1:45:51

Yeah, it does look fake.

1:45:53

Ew. It looks like AI Look

1:45:55

at how fat her head is

1:45:57

That's her back tits

1:45:59

are as big as her nose

1:45:59

The more I'm looking at that,

1:46:02

the faker it looks. You think

1:46:04

this is fake? Well, look at the clipping

1:46:06

around the... Look at how bad that's clipped.

1:46:08

Where? They're all her... Her...

1:46:11

Her tits? Her back? No,

1:46:14

the dress. Look at the dress around the wall. That looks like it's

1:46:16

been clipped out from another and put on that wall.

1:46:18

Dude, it's probably photoshopped. Fat

1:46:21

women still give themselves a fat

1:46:23

curve. Yeah, it looks like... Fat

1:46:25

figure. But it looks like it was... It looks

1:46:27

like it was... Do you think it was in a different background? Yeah,

1:46:30

I do, yeah. Get the fuck out of here. Why would she do that? It

1:46:33

just... That doesn't look weird. Where

1:46:36

did she take the picture in the first place? Like a meat packing plant? No

1:46:38