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0:33

We're

0:33

back. We're back. It's a distraction.

0:35

I'm drew the trough. How you doing? Roth

0:37

gets a World Cup female. I

0:39

guess I do. I guess I'm little worried about

0:41

whether or not it's going to come home. Well,

0:45

I believe it can come back to the house.

0:47

Yes. I am actually enjoying it. Like, I'm experiencing

0:50

the full, you know, like,

0:52

idiotic brain wipe between games.

0:54

Like, I don't know these dudes and I don't know what they

0:56

do. But when I'm watching them run around, I'm, like, outlook

0:59

at him go. So that's that's good.

1:01

That's

1:01

most I can hope for. By someone's younger

1:04

son, he was home sick yesterday. while

1:07

I was watching Iran and in the US, and

1:09

when political scored his great goal or

1:11

he, you know, he sacrifices dick in balls for the

1:13

greater good of of America. I

1:16

I was like, I judged. I was like, whoa.

1:18

It was like, I do this during football games too,

1:21

and scared the ever loving shit out of them.

1:23

He was like, I was not ready for that. And

1:25

I was like, I was like, Bitch, you know what

1:27

you got got into. I'm watching sports.

1:29

You know the damn man. Sometimes

1:31

you gotta call your son, Bitch. I

1:33

didn't actually I did not come to some bitch.

1:36

So, wait, was he act this is I don't wanna

1:38

make you violate

1:39

your son's HIPAA rights. Was he

1:41

actually sick because it's a pretty slick move

1:43

to be like, I don't know if I can go to school today,

1:45

the day of the US men's national

1:47

team game that starts during the school day. No.

1:50

because this is the the son that doesn't give a fuck

1:52

about soccer, so he was actually sick.

1:54

Speaking of sick. got pretty sick. guest.

1:57

It's Tom Lay. Our inner chief defector.

1:59

Hello,

1:59

Tom Lay. Hello. Hello.

2:02

Excited to be your sick and guest. for

2:04

the day. That's damn. That signature Tom

2:07

lay, caffeinated energy that he brings

2:09

credibly tight and sick. No. No.

2:11

I get yelled at for this. It brought does it, we're

2:13

at the same energy level. That's

2:15

true. There we did an episode

2:17

together during one of the ones that Drew missed, and it

2:19

was just me and Tom muttering about baseball

2:21

-- Yeah. -- big rally. Yeah. I was, like, waited for

2:23

us to shut up. For sure, our strongest episode

2:26

ever. Right? I would bet I I think many

2:28

were saying this. it was like a low concert. Just

2:30

very subtle.

2:31

Like, it rocked. You didn't

2:33

hear someone getting a text. There is a

2:39

We should talk seriously about the World

2:41

Cup. Although not too seriously because

2:44

Roth and I know Dick, thankfully Tom knows

2:46

a little bit more. Roth

2:48

and

2:48

Lay, really,

2:50

Lay. The

2:51

US men's national team is all to the knockout

2:54

round of the whole cup. They advanced in

2:56

the knockout stage only

2:58

twice in their history. The first time they

3:00

did so was in nineteen thirty

3:02

when they made the semi finals. And that was the

3:04

literal first World Cup. Only

3:06

other time they did was in two thousand

3:08

two when they made it to the the

3:11

quarter finals.

3:12

Can this team, Tom Lay,

3:14

be

3:14

the third US men's national team

3:17

to

3:17

actually win a game in the knockout round.

3:19

Can they beat the Netherlands? Yes.

3:22

Yeah. I don't I don't think I I think

3:24

it's very much they will be

3:26

the underdogs and not be favored

3:29

for a lot of good reasons. But

3:32

the Netherlands are

3:35

a great team, but they haven't looked particularly

3:38

right at this world cup. Like, they've

3:40

they've not been scoring

3:42

a ton of goals or creating a ton of chances.

3:45

And I don't know any other team like that.

3:47

I really don't. Yeah. Well, that's

3:49

the thing. Like, I I think there's

3:51

no reason to believe we can't play as

3:53

well against the Netherlands as we did against

3:55

England.

3:56

England is better. And

3:59

you know, and then after that, it just

4:02

comes down to, like, does some shit

4:04

break our way this time, you know. Like,

4:06

there's a lot of different permutations

4:09

of that England game where we could have come out

4:11

winning. So it could happen. Like, I I

4:13

don't think there's any reason to go into it being,

4:15

like, there's no fucking point in watching this, whatever

4:17

we're gonna lose for nothing. It'll

4:19

be a it'll be a competitive game. It'll definitely

4:21

be good, I think. Can I

4:23

ask an idiot's question about this? Yeah.

4:25

So that as

4:27

far as I can tell watching it, like, the

4:29

team looks more like

4:31

a proper World Cup

4:33

soccer team than any team

4:36

USA team that I can remember or US men's

4:38

national team. It also seems

4:40

like the defense is

4:42

far more advanced than the offense.

4:44

Is, like, is there obviously, I'm assuming

4:46

that police that

4:49

his balls will have been extracted from his

4:51

abdominal cavity in time for the

4:53

game on Saturday. Like,

4:56

how do you solve a problem like

4:58

your team doesn't have guys who can score goals?

5:00

Yeah. This is sort of a

5:02

pretty

5:02

common thing if

5:05

you follow Club

5:07

soccer with any regularity, like,

5:09

the process to becoming a good team

5:12

the

5:13

starts, you know, with having

5:17

solid defense, coherent tactical

5:19

plan, like players who can actually execute

5:21

that tactical plan. And then the last

5:23

and hardest step is, like,

5:26

consistently scoring goals. Like, that is

5:28

the thing that takes a team from

5:30

oh, these guys are pretty good. to, like,

5:32

this team rules and can kick anybody's ass

5:34

is you just need guys who

5:36

can score a lot of goals, which is why,

5:38

like, goal scoring players are the

5:40

most important and most expensive

5:42

in the world. And so, like, with

5:45

the US team in particular, it's

5:48

like our strikers are,

5:50

you know, probably the weakest point

5:53

on the team. And this is just kind of how it's going

5:55

to be. Like, that's not it's not a

5:57

problem that can really be solved

6:00

in the short or even, like, medium

6:02

term. Like, tactically, like, I think that

6:04

the the way the team is set up the philosophy

6:06

they're playing with, the way that the players are

6:08

functioning in the system is all pretty much been,

6:10

like, a minus stuff.

6:14

you just need a a guy or

6:16

two out there who was better

6:18

at kicking the ball into the net when

6:20

the chances come to them. And we just don't

6:22

really have those guys which is Do you not

6:24

consider do you not consider a Christian public

6:26

one of those guys? Is he more of a of a Yeah.

6:28

I mean, he he is best as

6:30

a facilitator even in his

6:32

runs with Chelsea

6:34

and with Dortman when he was, like, doing

6:36

really well, he was never really known as,

6:38

like, a a leak full finisher, like a

6:40

guy who you can just sort of count on for a

6:42

goal every game. So, like, the goals

6:44

we're going to score, if we score it in

6:46

an Netherlands game, we'll probably look like

6:49

the one we got against Iran where it's

6:51

like there's really good team move.

6:53

A lot of stuff happening and then it's

6:55

just like you've got a guy in the right place at the

6:57

right time. We don't have Right. You know, the striker

6:59

who's gonna get the ball up their

7:01

feet, thirty yards, turn, like,

7:03

send a guy to the floor, and then, like, curl one

7:05

into the corner. Like, we just don't really have those

7:07

dudes. which is fine. Like,

7:09

nobody has those dudes. Like, very few people

7:11

have those dudes. So this the way

7:13

the team is playing right now is, like, Yeah.

7:16

It's the same way a lot of teams

7:18

in Spain and England play

7:20

when they're sort of getting

7:22

themselves to a point where they feel

7:24

like they can be actually good and they just need,

7:27

like, those one or two more players who

7:29

can really provide, you know,

7:31

whatever you wanna call it, the finishing

7:33

point your clinical edge or whatever the whole,

7:35

you know, soccer competitors like to call

7:37

scoring goals? It's clinical

7:39

edge. That's a that's Yeah. They

7:41

like to talk about how you need to be

7:43

clinical in the final third or in

7:45

front of goal. So, like,

7:48

Like, and you it it's a dumpling say, but you

7:50

kinda get it, like, if you watch enough teams like

7:52

the US have been playing where they have the ball a lot and

7:54

the opponents have and they're doing a lot of passes.

7:56

and then make your cross and just, like, nothing happens.

7:59

You wanna get, oh, you gotta be more clinical in

8:01

that situation. But you gotta make a better final

8:03

pass. Yeah. The across where nothing happens

8:05

is just fuck. It's not clinical. You have to be

8:07

more clinical? I will say that as a as a

8:09

soccer dumbass too that, like, that's been the part,

8:11

like, all of what you were saying was very lucid made a

8:13

lot of sense to me. Yeah.

8:14

But it's frustrating because it's like, you'll

8:16

see guys doing cool things, and then it's just

8:18

like, right up until the last moment. And then the

8:20

thing you have to hope for is that it bogs off someone's

8:22

head. Right. Like, maybe while they're not looking

8:25

and goes in the right direction because the rest of

8:27

it, it's like, everything

8:28

happens except for the last five months. Yeah. That

8:30

is that's very frustrating. That is what the experience of

8:32

watching a non a

8:34

good but non dominant soccer team just is like,

8:37

that's just it goes. You're just gonna be

8:39

frustrated because they do so much cool stuff

8:41

that makes sense and you're like, yes, they're really

8:43

flowing. And then they just, like,

8:45

can't do that final thing. And the teams that can't

8:47

do it, like, the cool stuff just lasts,

8:49

like, a beep or two longer. And then all of a sudden,

8:51

there's a wide open goal and a guy's just tapping

8:53

it in. Also,

8:54

you get primed for it by, like, you

8:56

know, like, by, like, John Strong or something like,

8:58

oh, I think it's been very good. Mhmm. But, like, you

9:00

know, when that cross comes, that crosses

9:02

it to the middle. And you're like,

9:04

oh oh, here it comes. And then it

9:06

just like then the ball just lands. Or like the

9:08

goalkeeper catches it and you're like, you fucking

9:11

asshole. Yeah. Like, don't how dare you

9:13

ring dumb soccer thing is something that's,

9:15

like, a bunch of really cool passes

9:17

happening nearish the net. Like,

9:19

I know that I can, like, start edging towards

9:21

the front of the, you know, couch pillow

9:23

there. And then a dude just booms the

9:25

ball directly into the air. Like, just

9:27

straight up at a cloud. And I

9:29

know that soccer is really hard, but there's a

9:31

war where I was like, I would simply not do that.

9:33

I would kick it at the net. Yeah. There was

9:35

a there was a game. It was either the Wales

9:37

game or the England game where Western Kenny

9:39

had too good had

9:42

the goal in his sights twice and fucking

9:44

skied the shit out of the ball. And that I

9:46

just wanted dive. The the thing I was trying to

9:48

tell myself in those situations when

9:50

that happens is that

9:51

the ball is moving a lot

9:53

faster than you think yeah, it looks

9:55

on television and the spaces are much

9:57

tighter than they look on television. So, like but,

9:59

like, like, I meant, Kenny, chance I know the

10:01

one you're talking about, he's just staying in of the

10:03

goal. ball comes to him. He just deflects it, like,

10:06

over, you know, the

10:07

top of the crossbar. And, like, on

10:10

TV, it looks like we how do you not put

10:12

that in the net? But and it's very

10:14

frustrating. But I just every time I see that, I'm

10:16

like, if

10:16

that ball was coming at me, I would've just

10:19

cried. Like, I would've even been able to, like, put

10:21

my foot on it. like, there's just no way that happens.

10:24

Audible peel of, like, no.

10:26

Yeah. From the pitch, you try to

10:28

trigger things. I got two I got two

10:30

more work up questions for you, Tom. The first one is

10:32

about our coach, Greg

10:33

Berholt. Greg. Yeah. I've been Greg.

10:36

Greg. Greg, two

10:38

g's. Is he good? I've heard a lot

10:41

complaining about his

10:42

substitutions, particularly his unwillingness to

10:44

play Giorina? ask

10:46

him making the right decisions or

10:48

not? I I think he's

10:50

been good in the world. Like, I think in the qualifications,

10:54

there was a lot of concern just in

10:56

his selections and

10:58

that he likes to start guys who play

11:00

in MLS and other bullshit,

11:03

not good leagues. so far in the World

11:05

Cup, I think his team selections have been really

11:07

good. The geo rayner thing is,

11:09

like, I

11:10

don't I'm not as fired up about

11:13

that. as a lot of other people

11:15

are just because

11:17

to me, like, what matters

11:20

for for soccer specifically for

11:22

your manager is less about, like, not

11:24

so much the in game stuff, but

11:26

how

11:26

they set up the the starting

11:29

eleven and, like, you watch them

11:31

play, is it clear that they've

11:33

got, like, a plan in place and

11:35

that the players on the field are capable of

11:37

executing that plan? And I I

11:39

think that's happened in every single

11:41

game so far. Like, I've

11:43

I've watched a lot of soccer games

11:45

for my shitty team that I like where

11:48

it's just, like, ninety minutes of their just not fucking

11:50

doing anything out there. And you can tell,

11:52

like, they don't have a technical, like,

11:54

philosophy of, like, how they wanna play

11:56

and the guy is trying to do it. If they do have one, they're just

11:59

incapable of doing

11:59

it. And US does not look like that.

12:02

I think I think in all three games,

12:05

for, you know, large portions, probably the

12:07

majority of the portions of them. They've

12:09

been

12:09

or at least looked like the better team on the

12:11

field. So once you

12:13

get that down, then I think it just

12:15

comes down to, like, okay, what's the

12:17

actual talent ceiling of the guys from the field?

12:19

And I think we've seen we've

12:21

hit, you know, what our ceiling

12:23

is, which is we can do a lot

12:25

of cool stuff and defend, but it's just

12:27

scoring goals is difficult. And, like, that's

12:29

not something he can really control. And

12:32

soccer is not really a game where you can just, like,

12:35

oh, I'll just throw you a ran on there and he'll go get

12:37

a goal. Like, it's it's just so dependent

12:39

on a lot of other things. So

12:41

I I've been happy with them.

12:43

Like, I think there are a lot of

12:45

other national teams that have looked a lot

12:47

worse with a lot better players. And

12:50

they just probably don't

12:52

have the as, you know, as

12:55

coherent as a system or whatever or guys who has

12:57

bought into it. So I I think he's been

12:59

good,

12:59

unhappy with him. I think

13:01

my only concern has been it was particularly

13:03

true in the back half of the Iran game.

13:06

where it seemed like we were playing to sit on a

13:08

lead. And, like, you

13:10

know, I know from American football, but

13:12

that's always

13:12

a recipe for disaster. Yeah. I know what

13:15

you know. prevents you from winning. It does prevent

13:17

you. Yeah. III

13:19

was similarly frustrated by that. I

13:22

my mild defense of the

13:24

way that game ended is that,

13:26

like, there are some

13:29

things about a soccer game that, like,

13:31

you just kinda can't prevent the

13:33

way that it goes sometimes. Like,

13:35

sometimes it's just the natural course of it.

13:37

Like, if you're the

13:39

better team and you get that first goal,

13:41

if you don't get the second

13:43

goal by, like, you know, the sixty fifth

13:45

or seventy eighth minute, just like the

13:47

natural flow

13:49

of the game, kind of just demands

13:51

that you would end up kind of

13:54

defending with your pants on fire for the last ten

13:56

minutes. And that sound I I realize it sounds kind of stupid

13:58

to say that. You're just like, well, just don't do that. Like,

14:00

keep playing the way you were playing. But

14:02

it's just like the demands

14:04

being made on each team as time

14:06

ticks down just

14:07

change when the score

14:10

stays one zero. And that kind of, like in

14:12

a lot of ways, you just kinda can't prevent that.

14:14

The way you prevent that is

14:16

by, like, being

14:17

good enough to score two goals in the first

14:19

half, which we almost were or

14:22

being good enough to score one, you know,

14:24

right at the start of the second half, which we almost did.

14:27

But once you don't do that, it's

14:29

like, to me,

14:29

it's not so much of a of

14:32

a referendum

14:32

on their performance if

14:35

the game ends the way it did. That's

14:37

just kinda how soccer games go in

14:39

those situations. I also

14:41

forget Roth because of the

14:43

temperature here and because

14:45

I'm watching these games are taking

14:47

place really at nighttime. in

14:50

in Qatar. I am

14:51

forgetting that they're playing on a field that is

14:53

as hot as the surface of fucking mercury.

14:56

Yeah. They're probably gonna wear out a little bit and have a tough

14:58

time scoring goals. Yeah. And I mean, Eunice

15:00

Musa, you could see at the end of that

15:02

game basically couldn't move.

15:04

And also, like, our subs fucking

15:07

suck. Like, every sub you put on for

15:09

the US team makes the team,

15:11

like, ten

15:11

percent worse just because Well,

15:14

aside from, like, Aronson and Reina, but, like,

15:16

anytime you put one of those NLS guys on, it's, like,

15:18

okay, we've gotten, like, significantly worse at

15:20

that spot, which I mean, I get that you

15:22

do it because guys are tired and you need fresh legs out

15:24

there, but those fresh legs also

15:27

kind of stink. So Correct.

15:29

So are attached are attached to some

15:31

some just booty ass socks. Yeah. Sometimes

15:34

it's like that. The is that I'm assuming that

15:36

that's more like that can be

15:38

said of all but, you know, whatever

15:40

three or four teams -- Yeah. -- field

15:42

probably. Yeah. That because that's the part

15:44

where I you know, again, so much of my

15:46

understanding of this is, like, filtered

15:48

through what I don't know. And I see

15:50

a lot of people complaining about substitutions

15:52

like on Twitter and stuff like that. And I always feel like

15:54

that has aspects

15:55

of that sort of like over

15:57

determined over performance that

15:59

American soccer fans will sometimes

16:01

do in spaces like that where they want to sort of

16:03

like signal that they're not

16:05

full of shit that they have this expertise. But the

16:07

way that that comes out is by, like,

16:09

complaining and saying that various people are, like,

16:11

trash -- Yes. -- nightmare, awfulness and

16:13

like Yeah. Yeah. And I you

16:15

know, another one, like, I should be,

16:17

like, calling out names here. It's just being, like,

16:19

that's you. I'm talking about you Scott.

16:21

But, like, there are, like,

16:23

obviously, limits to, you

16:25

know, like, what any team could do. It's

16:27

just hard to I mean, even that I, you

16:29

know, was in the work Slack

16:31

when they did kinda like

16:33

pack it in yesterday and try to prevent a

16:35

girlfriend. And it's like everybody explained to me

16:37

very clearly why they were doing that. it didn't make

16:39

it any more fun to watch. It's fucking

16:41

excruciating. I hated it. Yeah. I

16:43

think, yeah, it is excruciating. And I think it's just,

16:45

like, the only way that stuff

16:47

gets easier to watch. So if you just sort

16:49

of try to accept or remind yourself

16:51

that, like, in soccer specifically,

16:53

you're just, like, players are just way more at

16:55

the mercy of, like,

16:57

the flow of the game than in other

16:59

sports. Like, it's

17:01

just it just happens. Like, that's just kind of

17:03

how it goes. And,

17:06

like, you know, if he subs in

17:08

GRE and at the sixtieth minute, like, do we get

17:10

another goal and, you know, then it's over? Like, I

17:12

don't know. I I think that when

17:14

I when I personally complain about

17:16

some soccer asshole not making the right

17:18

subs, it's usually be because what you're

17:20

watching on the field, like, clearly isn't working.

17:23

You're like, guys can't,

17:25

you know, get a pass into the opponent

17:27

box to save their lives. Like,

17:29

why isn't there a different winger out

17:31

there? I haven't really feeling from watching us. Like,

17:33

everything that I've watched, I've been like,

17:35

yeah. They're they're doing what they want to

17:37

do, what they hope to do.

17:40

and the stuff that's gone wrong is, like,

17:42

that's just sort of how the game goes when you

17:44

don't, you know, finish it off

17:46

early. Well, as an American, I just

17:48

like to say to that idea. fuck

17:50

that. I think we should play tempo. That's

17:52

what we should. I was I

17:54

I was definitely yesterday, like,

17:57

you know, you know, between, like, Slack and, like, Twitter, I definitely

17:59

I saw a lot

18:00

of, you know, dissatisfaction with the

18:03

men's, you know, this sucks and

18:05

stuff. And I was like, they winning. They won.

18:07

Fuck off. Yeah. Like I was just happy

18:09

that they they won. Yeah. I wanna ask you,

18:11

though, if if they keep winning, And

18:13

it

18:13

really this is actually this goes beyond just the US

18:15

men's team. Do you

18:18

believe that

18:19

people will put a

18:21

spiritual asterisk on

18:23

this tournament because of the time you're

18:25

it's being played, because of the injuries, because

18:28

the heat because of the attrition that lot

18:30

of these nations have suffered, which has

18:32

reduced. I think I think it

18:34

objectively has

18:35

reduced the quality of play compared to other world

18:38

cup Tom. Yeah. I think it's I've had a tough

18:40

time figuring that out yet. Like,

18:42

I think we'll probably see

18:44

more of that as the tournament goes on,

18:46

and we'll see if, like, stamina

18:48

really becomes a problem for people.

18:50

I don't know though. I I feel

18:52

like this is actually something that will go in

18:54

the other direction where the the

18:57

domestic

18:57

seasons will end up with asterisk on them because these

18:59

guys are gonna come back all fucked up. Like

19:01

Going into the tournament actually isn't that different

19:03

from it. It was the summer because when it's a

19:05

summer tournament, like, your league season

19:07

ends in May. You get a little bit of a break

19:09

than you're doing World Cup by June.

19:12

So it's like that

19:14

level of freshness is sort of similar.

19:16

But, yeah, the the big problem here will be when these guys

19:19

come back, you

19:21

know, teams that are, like, entitled races

19:23

are gonna have guys who are injured or tired

19:25

or fucked up. And I think that's

19:28

where the asterisk will go. I mean, I don't

19:31

like, it's definitely gonna get

19:33

I don't know. I I think so far it's been

19:36

fine, but things could get a

19:38

little wonky as the games go on and

19:40

guys are getting more tired and

19:42

then, you

19:42

know yeah.

19:43

But I I think asterisk

19:45

wise, like, it'll reflect more on

19:47

the on the club seasons than than this

19:49

actual tournament. That's

19:51

interesting. thing. Alright. Let's let's take a break. We'll come right back

19:53

with Tom Lay. Of defector, we'll be

19:55

right back after this.

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20:35

We're back to Tom Lay, our editor

20:37

in chief of the sector. We talked about soccer.

20:39

Now we have to talk about

20:42

real football. Hell

20:45

yeah. Tom, do you

20:47

still, like, cheer

20:49

for the

20:49

Denver Bronco's and If

20:51

so, why? Okay. So when I saw this

20:54

segment on the Will Run Dany segment, I was very

20:56

excited because we finally get to

20:58

address out in

20:58

the open the fact that

21:01

We've

21:01

worked together for,

21:02

like, ten years in every single football

21:05

season. This comes up. We're like, hey, man. You

21:07

like the bronchos? I'm honestly well,

21:09

I don't like the Bracos. I have never

21:11

written for the Bracos. Never been a bracos.

21:13

Oh, it's been for Yeah.

21:15

But this is my favorite recurring bit that

21:17

we have with, like, the Rockets will do something

21:19

terrible. You'll be like, oh, Tom, look at your team.

21:21

I'm like, don't don't like them.

21:23

You're you're you're from Denver

21:26

though. I am from Denver, Denver. Denver. Denver.

21:28

Denver. You murder Trump in a Ramsey.

21:30

Yeah. You have all the local ties.

21:32

Like, I mean, I fear. I get why it happens. Like, I, you know, I

21:34

root for the nuggets, the Rockies, every other

21:36

Denver team. So, yeah, the

21:38

answer to your question is no.

21:40

I don't remember the Bronco's, which --

21:42

I got for that. -- yeah. Well, if previously in

21:44

my life that was a deadly

21:46

mistake because they were, like,

21:48

winning

21:48

the Super Bowl when I was, like, twelve.

21:51

Yeah. I did not get to join

21:53

in a lot of that fun. Had

21:55

you adopted some other team just out of it because you, like, like their

21:57

No. So I my

22:00

mother was

22:03

a Raiders fan. I think

22:05

to spite her own parents who were

22:07

Bronco's fans. And then so when she

22:09

was raising me and my brother, she

22:11

was like, you know, the

22:13

bronchos are clowns. And we were like, yeah.

22:16

And then and then, like, I be

22:18

I, like, I honestly ended up

22:20

being growing up as one of those really annoying

22:22

just, like, NFL fans.

22:24

Like, I I could have worn the

22:26

Roblow NFL hat. No.

22:28

I fucking love it. football. All

22:31

football is good. Yeah. But I had no no

22:33

team or rooting interest ever,

22:36

which suck because then I I, you know, wanted

22:38

to be a principled

22:40

young man. So when the bronchos were, like,

22:42

winning Super Bowls, I

22:44

was always like, now it's I'm not I'm not

22:46

happy about this. It's not for me. You

22:48

didn't hop on the band. I did not. I

22:50

never did once. And my kids at school

22:53

freaking out wearing their jerseys going on along about

22:55

what a great team we had. And I would just

22:57

be like, no. I don't agree with that. Like, I'm

22:59

I'm sure that only in this Gary

23:01

is very tough, but unfortunately, he is not mine right now.

23:03

Well, I wanted to use I still want to

23:05

use Bronco's chat to -- Yeah. We can talk about it.

23:07

-- ways. Yeah. Well, I wanted

23:10

to actually talk

23:11

about one and done coaches because I

23:13

think that Nathaniel

23:14

Hackett and

23:16

Lavi Smith are

23:16

our two best bets to be one and done --

23:18

Yeah. -- coaches in the NFL this year.

23:20

spirits disagree. I don't think you can get rid of

23:23

hacking. III kinda

23:25

don't know the learning so much. I kinda find

23:27

works. I kinda think they won't,

23:29

but, like, The the Raiders already said

23:31

they're keeping Josh McDaniel's, which is

23:33

hilarious. And with that that leaves, I

23:35

think, Lovey and and Hackett as the

23:37

primary coverage. But I just wanted to let you

23:39

guys know I wanted to do a

23:41

quick brief moment of remembering some won

23:43

and done coaches because it's a

23:45

great list of names. There have been twenty nine of

23:47

them in league history were fifteen of them in

23:49

this century alone. Are you ready for the

23:51

list or off? Oh my

23:52

god, dude. Like, more than anything. Alright. So

23:54

your your first one is

23:56

Marty Schottenheimer, which you don't think of as a one in

23:58

Dunkin' Coach. But, of course, the

23:59

Washington tenure was hired by Dan

24:01

Snyder who brought in Dion and brought

24:04

in Bruce Smith and all. I

24:06

just told shit and Jeff George just told shit show, and

24:08

he got canned after one season. Despite

24:10

starring o and five and then going eight and

24:12

eight, Your next

24:14

one Did they bring back Gibbs after

24:16

that? Was that, like, what? Like,

24:18

not resuscitating Joe Gibbs. I don't

24:20

think the Joe I don't think Jogib's two point o was

24:22

right after that. Like, right after that was, like, norve

24:25

or something like that. I can't Okay.

24:27

And then art Shell,

24:30

again, another sort of because he'd already coached

24:32

the Raiders in the past, like, in the

24:34

nineteen eighties or in the nineteen nineties. And then

24:36

Aldey was brought him back for one year

24:39

and then fired them again. And then that was

24:41

my favorite of these. I'm not gonna talk after all

24:43

of them, but the Shell one was so good because

24:45

it was, like, it was,

24:47

like, absolute terminal stage, Al

24:50

Davis, just, like, absolutely

24:52

feeling it and doing whatever. Yeah. Shell hadn't

24:54

coached in, like, fifteen years

24:56

I remember their offensive coordinator that they brought

24:58

back was, like, running ABNB -- Yeah.

25:00

-- in, like, the Pacific Northwest --

25:03

Yeah. -- young guy. That

25:05

was great. Ending in Carson Palmer and

25:07

Randy Moss and being like, you you look like this would

25:09

be something you'd enjoy. Right? because you've been making

25:12

eggs for tourists for five years. And

25:14

now, Larry, we get really into the the guy

25:16

the list of the list of the list of the guys. Next one is your

25:18

next one is Cam Cameron. Okay. It's all from one

25:20

to fifteen to got fit face. Then the

25:22

next one is Bobby Petrino, which is

25:25

like, you got Petrino and

25:27

you got ShotNimer. Those are two,

25:29

like, really just fantastic one and

25:31

done seasons. And another one is

25:33

is coming up down the list. We also have

25:35

Jimora junior -- Mhmm. -- with the

25:37

Seahawks. We

25:39

have Hugh Jackson with the Raiders, not with the Browns.

25:41

The Browns kept him for two seasons. So

25:43

that he could win a grand total of one

25:45

game in two seasons. Then

25:47

we're back in Retread Land. We have Mike

25:49

Malarti with the Jaguars in

25:52

twenty twelve.

25:52

He'd already coached, I believe, the Bills.

25:55

And then poor Rob Chodzinski --

25:57

Oh. -- got the gate after just one

25:59

year with the Browns in twenty

26:02

thirteen. and then the

26:04

immortal Jim Tomsula with the

26:06

niners. So the niners

26:08

in twenty fifteen and twenty sixteen, they had back

26:10

to back one in Dunkin'ko So they started with

26:12

Tom Sula, and then they had

26:14

Chip Kelly. Like, because

26:17

they were like, oh my god. Why I

26:19

forgot. Didn't they? like, oh, like, this

26:21

this disaster, this this

26:23

cold pulverizer guy that we

26:25

got. We better get the guy who urine

26:27

tested every every eagle and

26:29

got himself running out of town. And for banishing taco Tuesday, he'll

26:32

be great. He fucked up. Twenty

26:34

eighteen, the Cardinals hired Steve

26:37

Wilkes and then fired him right away

26:39

for Cliff Kingsbury who,

26:41

like, is now a provably worse coach

26:43

because Steve Wilkes is, like, winning

26:45

with a deal with Carolina

26:48

Panthers team. Yeah. And

26:50

he had he won a game in which Sam Arnold

26:52

not only started but rolled on his

26:55

belly into the end zone. Like

26:57

like a kid in gym class and, like,

26:59

second grade gym class doing a log That was a

27:01

good sign. He scored a touchdown that way for him. Things

27:03

happen. You know? Like, III some people were, like,

27:05

laughing at the island. I was, like, he just remembered he

27:07

wasn't no one had touched him to

27:09

go score. So I he did the right thing.

27:11

It was just funny to see, like, a big boy.

27:14

Like, just doing a long role during a

27:16

football game before someone blew whistle. You got

27:18

you got three more. You got three kitchens,

27:20

the Memorial Freddie Kitchens. And then, of course, last year, Gini.

27:23

Last year, it gifted us two. One was David

27:25

Culley who got chicken by the

27:27

Texans merely for doing his job.

27:29

and then Urban Meyer, who think probably is

27:32

it's either Urban or Bub Katrina who are

27:34

the most entertaining Theascos of these won and done.

27:36

Yes. I can't really decide which Tom.

27:39

I think urban is

27:41

more entertained. I don't know. Bobby Bobby's stuff

27:43

was like just a little more dark,

27:46

I guess. Urban is just more fun to laugh at.

27:48

I'm I'm struck by it seems to

27:50

be

27:50

like a trend

27:51

that's picked up recently.

27:54

Like, I mean, there just seem to be a lot more

27:56

of this now than in decades past.

27:58

And, like, I wonder

28:00

what that's about. Like, I I don't get the

28:02

sense that owners care that much more about winning now

28:04

than they did or there's just,

28:07

like, everybody wants the next

28:09

Sean McVey, I guess, and they're just,

28:11

like, super eager to get

28:13

rid of people and find that guy. I don't know. It's

28:15

usually marketing since one -- Yeah. -- is the

28:17

most confusing to me. because that's, like, if

28:19

they really fire Smith. You can't say that

28:21

Lavi Smith is doing a much worse job than

28:24

David Cooley. And I think David Cooley did a pretty

28:26

good job. Yeah. They're just, like, what are

28:28

they even in trying to do. would you know if the coach was

28:30

doing a bad job? Yeah. I guess maybe you give them

28:32

a wrong They just do it for because

28:34

then they get to make a cool Twitter

28:37

clip of boss reporting for

28:39

work or, like, you know, big man's first day

28:41

on the job and, like, Tracy, that's good marketing,

28:43

sales season tickets. If there wasn't Twitter,

28:45

all these coaches would not be fired. They'd all have their

28:47

jobs for at least three years. Rivers

28:50

Macoun, who writes for football outsiders, has

28:52

been I think

28:53

more or less against his will on

28:56

the Texan's beat this

28:58

season. And he's really done a good and thorough

29:00

job of how shitty

29:02

they are because they had Davis Mills quarterback.

29:04

They finally benched him this week, but like Davis

29:06

Mills is really fucking bad. And

29:09

lovey despite being lovable.

29:11

I didn't mean that as a pun. No.

29:13

No. It's like Has actually done a

29:15

worse job than Kelly did a year ago.

29:17

and ultimately all of it lies not at the feet

29:19

of Jack Easterbee, who's already phased

29:22

out of power, probably

29:24

as as far

29:24

away like as like a year, a year and a half

29:27

ago. But Nick Casario, who is

29:29

now, like, the undisputed general manager of

29:31

that team, and has just

29:33

been fucking terrible and has

29:35

been terrible despite the

29:37

fact that they

29:37

traded to Sean Watts in a way who

29:40

they will

29:40

play against this this weekend.

29:42

for a host of picks, but they

29:44

have absolutely nothing to show for it despite getting

29:46

all of those picks. So Yeah.

29:49

But they're they're just a classively badly

29:51

run football organization at the

29:53

top. You know, it's typical fish rots from the

29:55

head type bullshit. Yeah. And so you can also say,

29:57

I mean, like, Davis Mills is pretty bad.

29:59

He is also like, quite clearly,

30:02

not just the best quarterback on that

30:04

roster, but the most promising. I think his

30:06

backup is like Kyle Allen or someone. that. It's

30:08

like It was yeah. It was kinda those, like,

30:10

absolutely known quantities. It's

30:12

always there's I guess, it's it's part of being

30:14

the Texan's coach, but there is a lot of

30:16

I mean, probably also saw this on Rivers

30:18

Twitter accounts. I I followed him back from when

30:20

he wrote for us advice, and he's

30:22

always good. But he has to spend a

30:24

lot of time watching press conference says,

30:27

where Lovey Smith is expressing

30:30

not just tonally, but, like,

30:32

textually, where he's like, I don't know what

30:34

alright. sure we're gonna do it. We'll see what

30:36

Kyle gives us. That'll be neat for

30:38

everybody to do that. And it's

30:40

like everyone seems so unhappy. There's

30:42

nothing you can really do to

30:44

make anything better until those picks start

30:46

showing up if they are

30:48

actually worth, you know, playing.

30:51

Just like the there's

30:54

some purgatory NFL teams. I think the

30:56

Texans have always been different.

30:58

Mhmm. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, there's the exceptions.

31:00

And they were, like, we're the Texans. You're, like, oh,

31:02

you're not real team. Like, whatever's going on

31:04

with the raiders is at least like it

31:06

started getting interesting now because it

31:08

seems like the Like,

31:10

it's like McDaniel's is there to shave

31:13

points. Like, if you

31:15

just gave the ball to Josh Jacobs, like,

31:17

thirty times a game, like, that would be kind of

31:19

annoying. He's gonna be and you don't wanna burn them

31:21

out, they just won't do that. And so,

31:23

like, the things that are working there, like,

31:25

Jacob's is great. If they throw to all the Davonte Adams,

31:27

he is great. And, yeah, like,

31:29

McDaniel's plan is just like, we need there's three

31:31

flea flickers per game. Question is where you

31:33

put them. Like, he's just doing the

31:35

fucking most all the

31:37

time. Yeah. It's it's

31:39

true. And the other thing that Rivers noted in

31:41

those lovely press conferences is how

31:44

clear it is from both lovely's sound

31:46

bites

31:46

and his body languages, that

31:48

the decisions he's making are not really

31:50

his, that he is being ordered.

31:52

Yeah. You know, you don't it's really it's

31:55

worked in baseball for, like, you know, the moneyball

31:57

a's and stuff when it's the GM

31:59

issuing orders

31:59

to basically the coaching staff.

32:02

But in

32:02

football, that's really just never that

32:04

good of an idea. Like, go look at

32:06

the cults. Like, you know, the cult started Sam

32:09

Ellinger because that's what Jim Mercé

32:11

wanted. That didn't work out all

32:13

that good. I

32:15

want a money ball if, like, you're

32:17

doing it with, like, the current royals.

32:19

Like, if you, like, get a

32:21

message from your boss, it's, like, hundred dozers your

32:23

lead off hit or you'd just be, like,

32:26

whatever. Alright. Sure. Like, that's what you think

32:28

is best. Well, so much of it is,

32:30

like, is

32:30

teams thinking, Okay.

32:32

Let's just do the money ball

32:34

thing. Like, they think that the the

32:36

process itself just magically works

32:39

where is, like, the reason the a is succeeded with that

32:41

was because I a genuinely smart

32:43

man in that position doing the money

32:46

ball shit. you have just any asshole

32:48

doing? You're a fucking dime store preacher doing it with

32:50

Jack Easterbee? That's like a fucking

32:52

work. I do this all the time. It's the

32:54

one Simpsons metaphor that I think pumped to

32:56

death the most vigorously, but I'm gonna do it

32:58

again one last time, which

33:00

is during the robot parade at Itchy and

33:02

scratchyland, there's a moment

33:04

where Marj's complaining about how dangerous it looks.

33:06

And someone from the park goes, no, these are very

33:08

sophisticated robots. And one of them just takes the top

33:10

of its head off and you can see the

33:12

circuitry inside. and, you know, March

33:14

says to Homer you see Homer, all

33:16

that stuff in there? That's why your robot didn't

33:18

work. And to

33:20

me, there's, like, everybody has been

33:22

building homer Simpson robots at in

33:25

this mode in sports everywhere where you

33:27

just build the outside of it and then you expect it to,

33:29

like, come to life and make you a sandwich. And

33:31

that's not how it fucking works. Do you like you

33:33

need a lot of stuff in there? That's like when

33:35

I was a kid and I want

33:37

to smoke a cigarette So I

33:39

rolled up a piece of paper, just a piece of paper. And I lit

33:41

it on fire and I smoked it because

33:43

that's what I thought a cigarette and fudge. Yeah.

33:46

That is probably nice. Almost burned

33:48

my fingers. I was like, whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. That's whoa.

33:51

That's cool. That's like that's what most people are like

33:53

when you see him smoking. Like, if you see Barry vaping,

33:55

he's making that sound the whole time.

33:58

I got okay. I

33:59

wanna talk about one more football thing.

34:02

Before we get on to

34:02

more serious matters with Tom Lai.

34:06

because

34:06

Odell Beckman is still a free agent

34:08

and is still recuperating from

34:10

a tornado. He suffered in the Super

34:13

Bowl. And from I assumed just being blind drunk

34:15

on airplane and and making a scene that they wouldn't

34:18

That was a warm one. Right? That

34:20

was weird. but he's still being courted particularly by the cowboys who so

34:22

horny for him. Like, they've talked so openly

34:24

about acquiring Odell that I really don't think

34:26

it's gonna happen now. It's just one of the things

34:30

we're you know, you the two of you, like,

34:31

we always know that, like, there's only so

34:34

so much smoke to the fire. Like like when

34:36

people talk about these deals endlessly and they

34:38

don't get secute it, like, then

34:40

they don't happen. But -- Yeah. --

34:41

I just wanted to say

34:44

that the cowboys are still so hot

34:46

and heavy for Rodell. but they were more

34:48

than willing to to

34:50

overlook the airplane

34:50

incident. And I just wanna read the

34:52

Jerry Jones quote about it. because

34:55

he

34:55

said, his overall team

34:58

compatibility, his judgement, his behavior is not an

35:00

issue with him. It is with many. It

35:02

isn't with him. So I just thought that was

35:04

I'd love it when Jerry The the response

35:06

from everybody about that plane thing

35:08

was so weird because when I

35:10

first saw it, I was like,

35:13

he

35:13

probably took a sleeping pill because he wanted to be

35:15

knocked out on the plane and then, you know,

35:17

you can be very delirious when someone tries

35:19

to wake you up and, like, whatever, no big

35:21

deal. was expecting his statement to be like,

35:24

yeah. Sorry, guys. I took a sleeping pill and I

35:26

was I was zooted. But then his statement

35:28

was like, from his agent was

35:30

like, oh, Dell Beckham did nothing

35:32

wrong. He was simply trying to rest his eyes

35:34

and the combative flight attendant made an

35:36

issue of the situation. he was not on any

35:38

substance. Like, blah blah blah. And I was like,

35:40

dude, like, just just say, like --

35:42

Yeah. -- take the easy way out. Like, what the fuck you

35:44

doing? And then Jerry Jones doing that

35:46

too. Like, don't know. He needs, like, better PR people because if any of them had any idea

35:48

what they're doing, like, yeah. Say he took an ambulance. He

35:50

wanted to sleep on the flight. Like, no big deal. But they

35:52

were like, no. He was stone cold sober.

35:54

Totally awake. find a dentist is

35:56

causing a problem. It's like, well, clearly not. I

35:58

love that. That is such a classic

36:00

bit of, like, also, I guess, if

36:02

you're, like, ODO BECOM's attorney. You've gotten to spend some time on

36:04

time. But you have to be thinking at some level,

36:06

like, this is my time to shine. Like, this

36:08

is, like, it's

36:10

star time. And so, like, the answer

36:12

to that question very obviously. It's like you don't

36:14

need to be like he was thinking about football

36:16

so hard that he was unresponsive

36:18

when contacted by flight stuff because he

36:20

wants to win that much. Yeah. Like,

36:22

you could be normal for, like, ten

36:24

seconds, and this isn't a problem. There is a money

36:26

turn a phrase from that attorney who said that

36:28

who blamed the incident on and

36:30

this is from the article. It was quote,

36:32

an overzealous flight assessment,

36:35

which -- Like, I also, my opinion is

36:38

that flight attendants can do whatever the fuck they want

36:40

because they're job they have nightmare jobs. Like,

36:42

you deal with so many

36:44

awful people. on a flight every

36:46

day. So honestly, even if a little bit of them

36:48

was just, like, a little sleepy and was, like,

36:50

kind of, rude, fine, fuck it. Like, I'm

36:52

on the flight attendant side. You can be as

36:54

shitty as you want. Yeah. Like, do you

36:56

have any idea how many, like,

36:58

evil drunks

36:58

they've already encountered? Like,

37:00

even on morning flights. Like, just about,

37:02

like, the worst realtor in some

37:04

town had five drinks and got on a plane with that flight. Their

37:07

job is literally being sealed inside

37:09

of a tin can with

37:12

no escape.

37:13

with the most chaotic and evil

37:15

drunk people on earth for five hours at

37:17

a time. Like, there's a tough You

37:19

can't feel more sympathy

37:22

for anybody. you have to extend the benefit of the doubt and that scenario because I feel like

37:24

as with a lot of these things, like, I always feel

37:26

this way when you see, like, chuds

37:28

talking about teachers and they're

37:30

like, yeah, they're trying to indoctrinate their kids and it's like,

37:32

no, man. They're in a room with, like, fucking

37:34

twenty five sentences. Would

37:36

you change would you trade places with them? Yeah. Do you think that you'd do

37:38

better? This is

37:40

fucking crazy. It's embarrassing. Also,

37:43

you know, also there's also the pandemic when they

37:45

had to deal with, like, oh, yeah, none of

37:48

you ever knew when you everyone one

37:50

passenger was gonna be like, America, they got because

37:52

they want to fly. because they were like, please

37:54

just please put your mask over your nose. Like,

37:56

make sure it's not gonna happen. can you

37:58

inconvenience yourself for seventy five

37:59

minutes. Can you do that? And

38:02

everybody's absolutely not. Yeah. I'm an

38:04

American. Just a white asshole and first thoughts be like, this

38:06

is worse than slavery. Just like chill the

38:08

fuck out again. funny.

38:10

But, Tom, we we are

38:12

having you on because well, we

38:14

wanna talk about sports because we're a sports we're

38:16

talking sports. We sports talk about the website

38:19

itself, which is defector. And this

38:21

will post by the time the

38:23

calendar has turned to December, which means we

38:25

will have completed We

38:27

already have completed two years of our existence.

38:30

Mhmm. Are we solvent? We

38:32

we're okay. Right? Right. Yes. The live.

38:34

The state of our union is strong.

38:37

So do I have to come

38:39

in tomorrow? Yeah. Yes. Alright. I will

38:41

do. Alright. Good. Yeah. We're

38:44

we're solvent. We got we got money in

38:46

the bank. baby were sending payroll out, you know,

38:48

paying freelancers, putting stuff

38:50

on-site. So, yeah, we

38:52

we are not going out

38:54

of business.

38:55

anytime soon. It seems that, you know,

38:58

what work can you ask for in this day and age

39:00

than than staying in business?

39:02

Honestly, it's true. Like, I And I

39:04

told Roth this privately that I

39:07

sometimes, you know, like like, when

39:09

we

39:09

started the website, we were all very excited

39:11

and all that stuff and then sell

39:13

them to being a regular job because that's what we wanted. Right? We wanted to have jobs and we

39:15

we made jobs for ourselves. And so

39:18

sometimes I take

39:20

for granted And

39:22

this sounds very grandiose, but I I take for

39:24

granted what we've managed to

39:26

accomplish.

39:27

Mhmm. And then, like, I'll

39:29

get stoned on a Friday night and I'll be

39:31

like, this fucking and then I'll put time in the

39:33

slack and be like, I love you guys. And then,

39:35

like, someone will be like, I can't

39:37

find Taylor Swift tickets. No. You're using

39:40

the point, man. No.

39:42

I I feel the same way. Like, I will

39:44

now that, like, You're right. It is a job now, and

39:46

we're, you know, more than two years into this now.

39:48

So I will find myself, you know, on, like,

39:51

a Tuesday night being, like, fucking

39:53

gotta do my stupid fucking

39:55

ass job tomorrow. I get I get

39:57

a lot of goddamn work. Like, this is

39:59

fucking stupid. Why does anybody do this? And then, like, I

40:01

think about it, like, five minutes. And I'm like, well, okay. It's pretty

40:03

nice. Okay. I guess I guess I got a pretty good deal going

40:06

on here. That is the

40:08

absolute state

40:10

of my I mean, that's the way it

40:12

has been everywhere that I've ever like, I've

40:14

been lucky. You know, like, I got staff jobs

40:16

even before we, like, created our own -- Yeah. -- like, an

40:18

actual workplace that the

40:19

first time I've really been in a workplace that

40:21

was functional where I wasn't worried about getting

40:23

laid off because some guy three

40:26

floors above me got board and was, like, yeah, I think

40:28

we're, like, just gonna be skateboarding videos now.

40:30

Sorry. You are fired. That, like and

40:33

yet, there's still the

40:33

part of me that I just I

40:35

any job, I'm gonna be kind of resent I think I think that's

40:38

healthier though. They do I think it's good

40:40

to understand that, like, jobs

40:42

are still jobs. Like, you know, even passion

40:44

projects like this, like, I think it's good

40:46

for your work life balance too. At least a little bit,

40:48

be like, I don't wanna fucking wake up tomorrow. I'm

40:50

gonna stupid

40:52

ass work. Yeah.

40:54

It would be weirder if somehow, like, what happened? Like, whenever that you

40:56

lift the vampire's curse of sometimes

40:58

being in the bathroom at the same time

41:01

Jim Spanfeller and all of us discover that we

41:03

have a completely untroubled relationship with working

41:05

for people. Like, as soon as he's not

41:07

there, we're just showing up

41:09

every day. Yeah. joining us and hopping in a circle. Yeah. Well, as I

41:11

said, I'm I'm so used to working for dysfunctional

41:14

conglomerates that when I finally work

41:16

for one that, like, works the way it's

41:18

supposed to,

41:20

I can't

41:20

accept that. So, like, my brain is, like, I should

41:23

find something to be dissatisfied

41:25

with that. I'm not happy.

41:28

Yeah. I definitely do that. Where and

41:30

then I'm like, why am I fucking worrying about it? Like,

41:32

I don't care. Like, whatever the day.

41:35

Well, I think I've talked to you both about this,

41:37

but I had this is a a weird, you know, like,

41:39

I have my my ups and downs mood wise

41:41

just because that's how my brain works.

41:43

But I noticed I think a

41:45

little before the second year

41:48

anniversary of defector that

41:50

it was like somewhere in that, like, eighteen month

41:52

period. that I started experiencing,

41:54

like, I was I wasn't sleeping

41:56

well, I was anxious, kinda grumpy, whatever.

41:58

And I think that it was my like,

42:01

that my body after all of these and staff

42:03

jobs that I've had, all of which I've had the same period of time, which

42:05

was like a year and a half plus one

42:07

month. That's how long it takes to get cycled

42:09

out of a gig. when

42:12

your owner gets bored. I think that I was

42:14

having, like, a sympathetic reaction to

42:16

it. It's like the way that you might struggle waking

42:18

up in the morning after daylight savings time

42:20

-- Right. -- something in my

42:23

body was just kind of like time for you to get fucking fucked

42:26

up. And that's

42:28

not right. it was I so

42:30

that was, like, coming out of that and then just,

42:32

again, having to be, like, yeah, I guess, I'm going back to

42:34

work was, you know -- Yeah. -- beyond, like, it

42:36

wasn't there was no bittersweet element to it. It was

42:38

just funny that I've evolved to

42:40

-- Yeah. -- get upset and let's on

42:42

this. This is like This is gonna sound really dumb because

42:44

it was one of the worst movies released

42:48

recently, but I was thinking about it, so I watched that awful, Supreme Court,

42:50

many things of Newark. The only part that

42:52

I liked a very bad movie, but the only part I

42:54

liked about

42:56

it was Raley out as prison the guy who's in

42:58

prison, who's just, like, a

43:00

former mobster who's just, like, zanning

43:02

into Buddhism. And he's

43:04

just, like,

43:04

right yeah, I just don't want

43:06

stuff. I I'm really

43:08

happier in prison because I just, like, I

43:10

don't

43:10

want anything. And I try to I try to

43:12

be, like, really out of prison sometimes. So I'm

43:15

just like, yeah. This is fine. You don't have to want too

43:16

much more than this. Like, you know So

43:18

really, Adi says Buddhist shit

43:20

that movie, I would just watch it. It's actually he

43:23

plays twin brothers in that movie. The

43:25

ninefold path characters. Yeah. He plays twin brothers in that movie.

43:27

One of them is a psycho. One of them

43:29

is cool. like, dies early, and then realy

43:31

on his back playing his twin brother. And

43:33

he does like, he it's pretty good. You know, he did

43:35

the he did the very good

43:38

lines. It the wanting that gets you. It's the wanting. And you just

43:40

kinda know that. You'll

43:41

be a a very high

43:43

performing gangster in New Jersey or

43:46

b --

43:48

Yep. a very satisfied and happy sports blogger.

43:50

Yeah. It's beautiful. Only I had

43:52

known that enlightenment

43:52

was as simple as Yeah. You should check

43:55

that. Maybe that explain it. desire

43:58

is poison It's amazing how quickly that movie just

43:59

got immediately wiped off the cultural

44:02

radars. Even though it was a sopranos

44:04

movie, like, it was that

44:06

much of a fucking mess that people were

44:08

like, hey, no. I really couldn't believe

44:10

how bad it was. I I waited, like, a

44:12

year to watch it because I was like, well, everybody said this is

44:14

bad, so I finally did like, you can't be that bad.

44:16

Right? Terrible. Terrible movie.

44:18

By by measurable plug now

44:20

that we have

44:21

opened up the the gift

44:23

subscription all So you go if you

44:25

go to defecture dot

44:27

com slash holiday dash gift,

44:29

you can give away a

44:31

gift subscription for a year to a friend or a family

44:34

member. And you get free beanie because we had a bunch

44:36

of beanies left over from last year, and

44:38

we were like, well, We can't burn

44:40

them, so you get them.

44:42

Yeah. We have beanies sitting

44:44

in just imagine them sitting in my

44:46

garage and causing me

44:48

great shame. every time

44:48

I see them -- Yep. -- and that'll encourage you to buy one. If

44:50

you don't wanna hat and you do a gift subscription, send

44:52

me an email and I'll send you some well.

44:55

Yeah. Or a hat. Tom, do you all remember a

44:58

guy? Yes. Well, good.

45:00

Because in honor of your Bronco fandom that

45:02

doesn't actually

45:04

exist, I I picked it in

45:06

advance. I picked Maurice Claret because

45:08

-- Oh. -- not like

45:10

not to mock Maurice Claret because he's been

45:12

through enough already. He actually he

45:14

was He

45:14

was profiled on ESPN for college game day a week ago about

45:16

his time in prison

45:17

and about an Ohio prison program for

45:19

rehabilitation and he's gone back to

45:21

campus and, like, he's like this

45:24

amazing story when back

45:26

when he was playing, back when he wanted

45:28

to he wanted to He was

45:31

a he was a great running back in Ohio State. He wanted

45:33

to come out after his sophomore year. The NFL said

45:35

no. And the tech industrial complex was like,

45:37

who just this young

45:40

man? think he is. And then he got, like, arrested well, like, a hatchet

45:42

in his fucking car -- Yeah. -- after he got

45:44

drafted by the Broadway. He was like, see, we told

45:46

you he wasn't a good citizen, and then he

45:49

went to jail And, like, we're in a spot now where we can look

45:51

back and be like, we treat this

45:54

person like

45:54

shit. Like,

45:55

what the fuck? Yeah.

45:58

I that's a good

45:59

guy to remember. I remember

46:02

being as, like,

46:02

someone who never really

46:05

followed college football much Claret was one

46:07

of those guys who, like, penetrated the veil for me. And

46:09

I was, like, very struck by him as a

46:11

player when he was at Ohio State. And I was,

46:13

like, this guy who was good

46:15

fucking rules. And, like, I was actually, like, you

46:17

know, down to watch an entire game that

46:20

he was in. And then did he

46:22

did he ever have, like, a good run with the

46:24

bronchos. I feel like I remember there was, like, some

46:26

four week spell. I was, like, there's the old

46:28

Murray's Claret. He was I don't

46:29

know that he ever even got in again. Did

46:31

he not? I think that he had

46:33

he so the story was that

46:36

he had a

46:36

drinking problem by the time he made it because he

46:38

missed a whole year -- Right. -- that, like, he played

46:41

that sophomore year And was as you remembered correctly, I mean,

46:43

that's how I remember it anyway. Like, looked like

46:45

an NFL player playing against

46:47

college players. And

46:50

then SAT and I think that he was during that so when the bronchos draft him, they draft

46:52

him in the third round. I know this by the way, not

46:54

to brag because I have a Maurice

46:56

Claret sitting

46:58

by my desk that I worked on. I

47:00

think it's the only football card you ever

47:02

got, the Bowman set that I wrote a

47:04

bunch of cards in when I was working there.

47:08

to pick them in the third round, which was, like, a

47:10

classic bronchos move in the same way that, like,

47:12

drafting kipo was where they're just, like, they'll

47:14

take a chance on a guy that they think is

47:16

great a little bit higher than other teams. Well, there's not necessarily

47:18

correct about it. So I don't

47:20

know that maybe one of you is as well Yeah. I

47:22

think you're right. I don't

47:24

think you'll ringing. I looked

47:26

it up and because I was gonna

47:28

say, well, actually, tell him, like, I think he was

47:30

okay with the

47:30

Broncos for a little bit before he got

47:32

arrested and was out of the league. But, no,

47:34

he never played down a football on the national football as well. I was probably just thinking

47:36

of when I would get him on my Madden

47:38

team. And I'd be like, Rich Claret. His back,

47:40

baby played with America. This is Also,

47:43

was he

47:44

like was he in, like, the do

47:46

you remember a guy who was a quarterback

47:49

for Ohio State? He got drafted.

47:51

He became a out, but Roger Goodell suspended him for five -- Yeah. --

47:54

games. It was prior.

47:56

Real prior. Real prior. Yeah.

48:00

I'm I I was trying to remember if

48:02

Gudell had suspended Claret for the same

48:04

sort of deal. He hasn't actually done

48:08

that since Chirrell prior, but, like, you never know

48:10

when Roger's gonna be, like, yeah,

48:10

I feel like doing that again. It wasn't Thirrell prior, like,

48:13

it was, like, the tattoos or something. It was

48:15

fucking you got free

48:18

tattoo too. It ended Jim Trussell's job.

48:20

Yeah. Traded an autographed helmet for

48:22

a tattoo, which we can assume given that

48:24

it was a a college student getting the

48:28

tattoo that it was, like, Jesus Christ carrying a

48:30

football. And then there's, like, a speech bubble coming

48:32

out of his mouth being, like, good luck, Carell.

48:35

Yeah. We just bad decisions. I'll go because I I

48:37

will say that, yeah, the record. It is nice

48:39

to sort of remember something like that and kind

48:41

of feel like that's all ancient

48:44

history. Like, I just don't think that

48:46

happens anymore these days. Like, just due

48:48

to general sentiment and

48:50

NIL stuff happening, which, you know,

48:52

whatever, there's still a

48:54

lot of problems with college sports, but, like, it is nice

48:56

to think that I

48:57

hope that, like, that

48:59

wouldn't happen

49:00

now. Yeah.

49:02

Like, as scuzzy as the NIL stuff can Yeah. I got

49:04

a feeling good. It's great. you

49:06

guys got a job at Auburn. Every the system

49:10

works. Yeah. was funny. I was

49:12

reading so I've been trying to write about that. I was reading,

49:14

like, some pretty straight coverage of it, like,

49:16

from, like, USA Today where they were,

49:18

like, huge reads was great at paying players

49:20

before you were, like, allowed to do that. So you gotta assume that the NIL thing

49:22

is gonna really suit it. Yeah. Which

49:24

is, you know, that's not wrong. It's just kind of a

49:26

funny way.

49:28

see. Yeah. It's also, you know, if you're leaving out the park where he was at a

49:30

high school in, like, forced girls to

49:32

take their shirts off in front of them and

49:35

just like that, You should mentioning that. Yeah. That's

49:37

kind of important. Eric oh,

49:39

writes in. This time for the fun bag. Yuri

49:42

I'm sorry. This from Yuri. He writes

49:44

in, Tom. If you had to live

49:46

the same calendar day every day for the

49:48

rest of your life, is there a particular one

49:50

you would choose? Your actions would

49:52

carry forward? So it's not a groundhog day experience. It's just living

49:54

another April twenty fifth or another

49:56

Christmas. Oh. So what day do

49:58

you pick on the

49:59

calendar to live over and

50:02

over

50:02

again knowing that you're going to live it again.

50:05

I feel

50:06

like you need

50:07

to, like, consult the Farmers Almanac or something

50:09

and figure out, you know, like, what data is the best chance

50:11

of, like, being seventy five degrees and

50:14

not ringing.

50:17

And then this is,

50:18

like, if I travel

50:21

anywhere, like, it's the same day. It's

50:23

the same day anywhere I am. Yeah.

50:25

Let's say that. Yeah. I guess, I

50:27

I would go with, like, sometime in April. I suppose, April

50:29

seems pretty safe. It gets rainy, but it sounds to

50:31

be April nice enough up there, or does it have some Yeah.

50:34

It still

50:36

have some leftovers. Yeah. It's it's nice enough up here. I

50:39

because maybe I'll push it to

50:41

May. Yeah. Let's do let's do, like,

50:44

May twenty

50:44

fifth. That's what I'll do. Yeah. I'm a I'm

50:47

a late August, early September guide. I

50:49

feel like you're just gonna hopefully

50:52

not be dealing with too much of the extremes of

50:54

weather one way or the other. And early September,

50:57

especially like they're around Labor Day,

50:59

but like before Labor Day.

51:02

everybody's just sort of fucking awesome. Like, it's just things

51:04

are sort of happening in the world, like, baseball's

51:06

starting to get interesting, but it's not stressful

51:08

yet. There's not a whole lot else going

51:10

on. What I want

51:12

is a period where everybody has sort of

51:14

tacitly

51:14

agreed that it's not an important

51:17

time to be alone one way

51:19

or the other. It's just sort of

51:21

receding accordingly. I was like, may you get a little bit out

51:23

of it in May. Like, people were just sort of waiting for

51:25

summer to start. Schools are ending. Yeah.

51:27

And that's, like, fuck this.

51:29

Yeah. It's a great time to be a kid as well too because you're

51:32

kinda like, it's starting to get nice. You can see

51:34

the end of the school year from there, but

51:36

it's not you know, there's nothing to

51:38

get stressed out about. You're in that. Like, it's what I'm

51:40

describing where you're basically sort of on a

51:42

glide path towards events. And you're not

51:44

you're

51:44

not yet panicking about, like, oh, I'm wasting

51:47

my summer. Like, you're just like, yeah. It's me. Like, everything's fine

51:49

right now. Like, you're thinking about all the

51:51

sick bike rides you're gonna go on during the

51:53

summer instead of regretting the ones you Yeah. None

51:55

of you picked, like, Oh, my birthday. Oh,

51:57

it could be my birthday every day. My birthday

52:00

is in February, and it's my wife that I

52:02

have this well, we have a

52:04

couple problems. one of

52:06

which is being that our our tasting restaurants is,

52:08

like, obnoxiously booji and

52:10

probably antique at this point. It's our Where we

52:12

wanna go to places where it's, like, seasonal

52:14

food prepared in cool ways. And her birthday is in

52:16

January and mine's in February. So we go to

52:18

these restaurants and they're just like,

52:20

of rule out of

52:22

turn ups. Like, this is nothing is growing. The earth is frozen. You know, winter

52:24

style of It feels like potatoes,

52:26

some carrots -- Yep. -- some walnuts

52:28

in there. So good. Wow.

52:31

Is this celery root? Is it all celery root? This is cool. I'll

52:33

pick a I'll pick a day

52:35

in May because Like,

52:38

anything that it's all entirely weather based. So it's like, I

52:40

won't pick October, but if I can pick a day that is

52:42

as close to, like, just living in Los

52:46

Angeles, Like,

52:46

that weather, like, that's fine. Like, I already know that I

52:48

could do that year round. Like, if I lived in full

52:50

year round, I'd be like, okay.

52:52

bag okay I think I wanna, like, go jump into

52:55

pool and, you know, do that. So

52:57

Yeah. No. Brandon Nicks and Chantel Holder

52:59

are our producers, nor Richie is

53:01

our executive producer. are themed songs by Kirk Hamilton.

53:03

You can listen to ad free episodes of the distraction only on

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such a premium. And next

53:08

to Roth, Tom

53:10

and me, we got three months to touch premium

53:12

right now, which goes to touch premium dot

53:14

com. You can use the promo code,

53:16

distract. We're at now. Don't

53:18

forget to rate, review, and subscribe wherever

53:20

it's Gillesen. And again,

53:22

it's defector dot com slash

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how the day dash gift if you wanna give a a gift

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subscription to someone, or just go to factor

53:29

yourself if you wanna subscribe.

53:32

and we will see you guys next week.

53:34

Thank you for coming on, Tom. Thank you for having me.

53:37

Hi, everybody. Bye.

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