To paraphrase 80s ragamuffin Ferris Bueller “here’s where Dan goes berserk”. Weird for him to take a break from mischief making to boldly predict the first half hour of a Scottish football podcast several decades in the future, but there we are. Anyway, if you can make it through that, we promise it gets better, so pull up a pew and join your old pals for Episode 95 of The Dogger Saints Podcast!

Yep, we had to talk football. With four mens games to cover, and a look at some of the more contentious elements of the past few weeks, including Levein-ball, the skipper and VA-fucking-R.

However, on a happier note, we get to cover a couple of wins for the women’s team, covering fine performances against Livingston and Gartcairn, and even have a wee catch-up with *checks notes* centre-forward Nicole Carter.

We know what you’re all after though. Features, baby! Features by the damn barrel load! We’ve got them all, including a visit to everyone’s favourite talking shop in The Good, The Bad and The Banto, before the Banto comes up trumps in this week’s visit to see George in The Royal. We also head over to the home of this year’s Euros for a both puzzling and delicious instalment of the Club Shop of Shame, and we have a stylish instalment of Theme Team for your listening pleasure.

Buff Sam Miller! House Salesman Danny Williams! Punk Ass Bitch Tommy Lovenkrands! We’ve got it all and much more, including some fond farewells and a load of other shit, so settle down and enjoy yourselves. Get there!

This episode is not sponsored by the fine fine people at Possible estate agents.