0:00

This is The Eds with Eddie Judge

0:03

and Edwin Aroyavi.

0:05

The husbands know best a too

0:07

cheese production.

0:08

All right, So because it's wedding season,

0:11

it's time to talk

0:13

a little bit about what the guys think about,

0:16

you know, weddings and anniversaries. And

0:18

you know, we talked about my televice proposal

0:20

and wedding experience with my wife

0:23

on TV, which is an amazing

0:25

experience. And we touched a little bit about you

0:27

getting married in Paris. But I'd

0:29

like to learn a little bit more about your

0:32

journey to Paris and did

0:35

you ask John for permission to get married

0:38

for her hand? And how

0:40

did you propose to her? And what was tell

0:42

me all about the wedding in Paris. That sounds like an

0:44

amazing experience. Yeah, But the funny

0:46

thing is I was always afraid of getting married.

0:49

That was actually one of my biggest fears.

0:51

And it was because at

0:53

least sixty or seventy percent of my friends

0:55

that got married were getting a divorce, right,

0:58

and I was just trying to.

1:00

In my head, maybe I'd get

1:03

married at like forty five or something

1:05

like that. Anyway, Teddy and I get

1:07

pretty serious, and you

1:10

know, the talk comes up of should

1:12

we get married, should we not? And

1:15

I remember thinking to myself at

1:18

the time. I told Teddy,

1:20

I'm like, look, I do want

1:22

to get married, but like I

1:25

take care of my entire family, like I've been taking

1:27

care of my family since I was

1:29

fifteen. I'm like, what if

1:31

you wake up five years from

1:33

now and you

1:36

don't want to be married to me? Like now, I got to give

1:38

you half my stuff, And

1:41

I said, I don't have John Mellencamp money

1:43

yet. And you know, John could

1:45

afford to get divorced for three, three

1:47

four different times. I'm like, I can't

1:50

if I get divorced one time, I'm losing

1:52

half my stuff. I got to take care of my mom. Blah blah blah.

1:54

So she's like, I

1:56

don't care about your money, and I'm like, all

1:59

right, answer, And

2:01

so that put me a little more at peace, and

2:04

she's just like, don't touch my money. It's like, mho,

2:07

we got we got a deal. But

2:09

I was still freaking out, and I remember going

2:12

back and forth and finally I

2:16

told her, look, I can't marry. I'm just I

2:18

can't. And you

2:20

know, I remember it was a tough night that

2:23

night because she cried. I cried,

2:25

I'm just like I can't do it. And

2:28

the next day I'm driving and

2:30

I thought to myself, what am I so scared

2:33

of? Like I've always been

2:35

sort of a risk taker, and

2:37

why am I so afraid on this? And

2:41

I already know I want to marry her? Like what am I trying

2:43

to? Why am I waiting? And

2:46

there was this start in my head though that was like,

2:48

Okay, well maybe if I buy the rank,

2:51

I could buy myself some time and

2:53

you know, maybe we'll get married two

2:56

years after. But

2:58

screw it, I'm by the ranks. I went, I bought

3:00

the ring and

3:03

I called John and

3:05

I just basically said, hey, John, I want to marry your daughter

3:08

and I think she's the best thing that's ever

3:10

happened to me, and I'm

3:13

going to take care of her and you got

3:15

my word that I'm

3:17

going to be the best husband possible. And

3:20

he was he was like, yeah,

3:22

you know, I if that's what you guys

3:25

want to do. I fully supported, and

3:27

then I ended up proposing to her. I

3:30

bought her a nice, I think Gucci jacket,

3:32

and I put the ring in the jacket

3:35

and I proposed in front of my entire

3:38

family when we were living out in Woodland

3:41

Hills. It's a special moment.

3:43

But then then we don't have a date. Right

3:46

in my head, I'm thinking the date's going to be two years

3:49

later, right, And that buys me a little time

3:51

again because I'm just it was a me thing.

3:53

It wasn't a Teddy thing.

3:54

I was just scared, right.

3:57

And then of course we go around

3:59

and you know, everybody's congratulating

4:01

us on the engagement, but

4:03

what do you think? The first question is when

4:06

you get engaged, when's doa any

4:09

and our answer was we don't know.

4:13

So then Teddy's like, you

4:15

know, I feel really stupid that we don't have

4:17

a date. I'm like, oh, here

4:19

we go, so we still don't have

4:21

a date. Anyway. Six months later, we're

4:24

about to her dad's

4:26

going on a tour in Europe,

4:29

and Teddy's like, you

4:32

know what, why don't we get married in Paris.

4:34

My dad's going to be touring, it's fourth

4:36

to July is going to be in Paris. We can

4:38

just get married fourth to July. And

4:40

then my dream was always if I

4:42

ever did have a wedding, I'd have

4:45

it. I'd have what do you call

4:47

those weddings when you fly out and

4:49

get away wedding and where,

4:52

yeah, where, It's just a few of us,

4:54

and I don't have to worry about who I invited,

4:56

who I didn't invite. I just kind of wanted

4:59

to do it quick. You have twenty close

5:01

people. And that's exactly

5:04

what ended up happening. And we took off to Paris,

5:06

but two weeks prior

5:08

to leaving. I mean, this is how freaked

5:10

out I was. I

5:13

wake up in the middle of the night and

5:16

I can't move my entire left

5:18

side of my body, like

5:21

I'm thinking I'm having it and I'm probably in one of the best

5:23

shapes in my life. And

5:26

it must have been at least a minute to two minutes.

5:29

I couldn't move the entire left side of my body,

5:31

and I felt like I was having a heart attack. And

5:34

I remember saying, like, God, don't let me go out like this.

5:36

And I'm trying to wake up Teddy, but I can't talk.

5:38

It's just it's weird. I

5:40

can't move, so I go

5:43

to the hospital. I spent the entire

5:45

day in that hospital. I

5:47

had to wear a heart monitor for

5:50

an entire week just to find out

5:52

what was wrong. With my heart because my whole left arm

5:54

went numb. Well it was eight

5:56

days. So I did that for an entire

5:58

week, and it turns

6:00

out I had a panic attack. I've

6:03

never I've never

6:05

had that in my life, and

6:07

I've dealt with a lot of stressful situations.

6:10

By the way, that's never ever

6:12

happened to me, and God will it will never happen

6:14

to me again. But that's how freaked out

6:16

I was. And Teddy's

6:19

like, maybe we shouldn't fled, Like, no, we're going to get married.

6:21

So then cut to we're

6:24

in Paris and we're having

6:26

a great time. We're

6:28

about to get married, and

6:31

you know the part, I can't make

6:33

this up. I put this on everything. I

6:36

had, put my alarm back then I used

6:38

to wake up at six am. Well six am is two

6:40

pm in Paris, right,

6:43

so we're about to get married. We walk out and

6:46

the eye blah blah blah. It's really nice. We were

6:49

on top of some roof at some hotel

6:51

and so we're looking the Eiffel Tower. So

6:53

we took these beautiful pictures. I

6:55

got to fly out my family, so my

6:58

siblings, my mom came out. They'd never been Europe,

7:00

so it was just perfect right. And

7:03

who organized it all? I mean Eddy

7:07

ed he found someone in Paris and they did

7:10

just a great job just organizing

7:12

the entire thing. It's funny

7:14

my mom, who doesn't speak Spanish,

7:16

I mean doesn't speak English. My mama doesn't speak

7:19

a lick of English, is hanging

7:21

out with Meg Ryan and they're talking. My

7:24

sister's like hanging out with her. I remember, I remember we used

7:26

to watch your movies and like, oh, shoot, now my mom's

7:28

talking to Meg Ryan. I'm like, that's that's

7:30

pretty cool, right. Anyway,

7:34

you know the part when you're getting married and they say,

7:37

if anybody of Jack's or whatever

7:39

that's whatever that phrase is, I

7:41

kid you not. As he's saying that,

7:44

myles, I'm about to start crying,

7:47

and I'm like, I did not want to cry at my

7:49

wedding, but I'm feeling I'm like,

7:51

damn, I'm gonna start crying like crazy right now.

7:54

And he says, does anybody of Jack

7:56

blah blah blah. My alarm

7:59

goes off and

8:03

in my head, I'm thinking, is this guy

8:05

telling me not to get married? So

8:08

there's this picture of Teddy and I and

8:10

we're just dying of like, we

8:12

just started immediately laughing because

8:14

when my alarm went off, John's

8:17

like, you gotta be shitting mate,

8:20

We just started laughing. Anyway,

8:23

we end up getting married and

8:27

we had a blast. My family

8:29

had a blast. Some of the best pictures we've ever taken

8:31

were there and it's a special moment.

8:33

How many people were there?

8:35

Twenty of us, so it was Teddy's

8:38

immediate family and then it was

8:40

my immediate family, so there's probably eighteen

8:42

twenty people there. And then

8:44

our honeymoon was basically going around with

8:47

John all over Europe while he was touring.

8:50

How long was that?

8:51

It's probably a good ten day. So when

8:53

we went to Germany, we went to Milan,

8:58

we went to Florin,

9:00

we went to England. Where

9:03

else should we go? We went to a bunch of places

9:05

where he was touring. It was cool because everywhere

9:07

we went we got the red carpet treatment.

9:09

So wow, what is

9:11

awesome experience? Yeah,

9:14

yep, but.

9:15

Art monitor and my alarm went off,

9:19

and it's worked out so

9:21

far. It's gonna be fifteenth. This will be our

9:23

fifteenth year together and

9:26

it's thirteen

9:29

years married in our

9:31

anniversaries fourth of July, so

9:33

it's kind of hard to forget that one. Yeah.

9:36

Yeah, So you get to celebrate for the July

9:38

and your anniversary every year.

9:41

And then her birthday is on the first, so

9:43

you got the first and the fourth.

9:45

Oh my gosh.

9:47

So I kind of get away with

9:49

just an entire weekend whether and just you

9:51

know, yeah, and it's

9:53

fireworks every year. It's fir Secret

9:56

year. Exactly. That's fantastic.

9:59

That's gonna be a hard one not to forget, you know, it's

10:01

for the July, come on, yeah,

10:03

exactly, and it's Independence

10:06

Day.

10:06

I can't believe how fast it goes, though.

10:09

How long have you guys been together?

10:10

By the way, we have been together thirteen

10:12

years married, ten And I

10:15

always whenever somebody asked me that

10:18

questions, I always realized that these

10:21

last not just ten years

10:23

married, but that the whole thirteen years have

10:25

gone by so freaking fast,

10:28

like almost like I feel

10:30

like I just met her last year and we're still

10:32

just trying to figure out, you know, what are

10:35

we going to do with our life together? Right, But

10:37

there's been so much that's happened, and

10:40

I think big part of it is

10:42

because she's been on TV for so long.

10:45

Yeah, we've lived this crazy

10:48

world wind of life where we're walking

10:51

red carpets, we're attending, you know, high

10:55

level events, we're invited to these

10:58

great VIP experiences, you

11:00

know, traveling. I was traveling

11:03

a lot when I first met her, and I

11:05

just take her on my trips to you

11:07

know, Brazil, Europe,

11:13

anywhere in the world that I could go, I would take

11:15

her with me. And I think that's one

11:17

of the things that we missed mostly

11:20

about, you know, since since

11:22

COVID and COVID shutting down

11:24

the world, we missed traveling that much like we used

11:27

to. But that's that

11:29

was one of the things that just made our life. Just

11:31

our relationships just go by so fast.

11:34

You know, how long were you guys together before

11:36

you decided to ask her

11:38

to marry you?

11:39

Three years? Three years?

11:40

So, like I said, we met and

11:43

it was probably about a month after

11:46

she left her ex

11:48

and moved down on Rome that we started dating.

11:51

And it was fun. It was just never never

11:53

thought I would be marrying her, you

11:55

know. It was just such a chemistry

11:58

between us and easy talking

12:02

and and just time

12:04

spent together was so nice and relaxing,

12:06

and everything

12:09

just kind of made sense when we took

12:11

it's little by little, one step at a time where

12:13

she moved out, she stabilized

12:15

her herself, and then she stabilized

12:17

her kids, you know, going through the whole divorce.

12:19

It's just it was a nightmare, right,

12:21

And she lived on her own for a couple of years.

12:24

I think before we started talking

12:26

about marriage, and if

12:28

you remember, we were talking about just having a little

12:31

beach wedding with a few people, and then

12:33

producers found out and we ended up having this giant,

12:36

enormous wedding, which

12:38

I don't regret at all. It was an incredible wedding.

12:41

But then she moved

12:43

in, and you know, well before she

12:45

moved in, she her

12:48

her son, her oldest son, had a pitbull named

12:50

Bronx that you know, needed a home

12:52

because he was moving into an apartment. And I had

12:54

just bought this house here in Ladera,

12:57

and you know, being single and living

12:59

in this and I decked it out with you

13:01

know, darkwood floors and you know, the

13:04

brand new house. So I was all really proud of

13:06

it. Nothing was out of place, and I was

13:08

real anal at the time. And she says,

13:10

hey, have a dog. Can you have a dog, because

13:12

you know we're going to need a dog for Spencer. When when

13:15

he moves in with us, you know, or moves into

13:17

the house, I'm like, okay, but he's

13:19

going to be an outdoor dog. He's not going

13:21

to be inside. And sure enough,

13:23

it took about a week before I fell in love

13:25

with the dog, and I think I slept with

13:27

them one time, and I'm like,

13:29

yeah, no, I can't sleep with the dog.

13:31

Forget it.

13:31

You know, I love you, but you're gonna have to sleep downstairs

13:34

or in your cage. And he ended

13:36

up ruling the house and ruining my floors

13:38

and ruining the backyard. But

13:40

he brought so much love and so much

13:42

stability to the family, particularly

13:45

because he was he

13:47

became basically Spencer's dog. He

13:50

slept with Spencer the entire time

13:52

that he was with us, and he was just

13:54

an amazing dog. But that was probably

13:56

our biggest connection with between

13:58

me and the kids, was that dog, right,

14:00

that dog that just you know, brought us together

14:03

and made us a family. It

14:05

was a it was a smooth

14:07

but rough transition because the divorce

14:09

was just an ugly divorce. The guy was

14:12

really using the kids to try

14:14

to get to Tamra and he

14:16

didn't give a shit about their mental health

14:18

or you know what the effects were going to be on

14:21

them. So it

14:23

was really hard on the kids because of that. Otherwise,

14:26

you know, it could have been easy. He could have

14:28

gone his way. She obviously was happy in

14:30

her relationship, and the kids would have been great and

14:32

they would have got it. But it was such an ugly

14:35

public divorce that I

14:38

really didn't even see. We both

14:40

didn't really see ourselves getting married because

14:42

it was such an ugly public divorce. You

14:44

know, it just didn't really makes sense

14:46

to do that. And that's probably the biggest

14:49

reasons why we wanted to just have a small

14:51

little wedding without announcing

14:53

it to the world. You know, our lives are already

14:56

on a platform and everything is

14:58

out there that she does, and she doesn't hold

15:00

back, as you know, she just puts it all

15:02

out there, and I'm like, there's got

15:04

to be some sort of you know, privacy

15:07

here.

15:08

By the way, did you guys do uh prenup

15:11

or no prenup?

15:12

We did not do a prenup. You know, it

15:15

just it didn't make any sense, and

15:18

I think from our generation

15:20

it didn't. It was it was

15:22

a negative connotation to have a prenup.

15:25

Right. It was like, well, if you don't trust me, I don't trust

15:27

you. And it was one of those things like plus,

15:29

I mean, I didn't have a lot. I had a house,

15:31

I had a career, and you know I had money in the bank,

15:34

but I didn't have I wasn't wealthy, so

15:37

it didn't matter to me. And of course she

15:39

was on a show and she's on

15:42

her way to making a lot of money. But

15:44

she said, no, I don't. I don't think this is something

15:46

that applies to us. So, yeah,

15:49

you know, we had a prenup.

15:50

I was going to ask you that, you know. So that

15:54

was the whole That was the whole conversation. That's that's when

15:56

I go, all right, I'm in. And I said, look, if we do

15:58

a prenup, we're good. And

16:01

I won't get any of your money. You know, whatever

16:03

John leaves you, you don't touch any of my money.

16:06

And but the funny part is, you know, now we've been

16:08

married over ten years. She always reminds

16:10

me that, I guess after you've been married

16:13

for ten years that preenam

16:15

goes away. And

16:18

it's so funny because the prenum was a very aggressive

16:20

one and like

16:23

just freaked out. But it also, I

16:25

guess, showed me that she didn't really

16:27

care about it. And obviously she's got her own

16:29

money, right, so she doesn't really care. But that

16:32

was kind of a big deal for me that she would. And

16:36

yeah, she reminds me all the time. You know, it's it's

16:38

over ten years. I could take all your shit if

16:41

I want, so, she

16:44

likes to remind me. It's a

16:46

California law, which I haven't even checked

16:48

it, but apparently it is. So yeah,

16:50

that thing went by.

16:51

By from my understanding, and

16:53

I don't know how the prenums work.

16:55

I assumed it was kind of an iron clad

16:57

log like, hey, this is I keep

17:00

what I have at the time of the marriage,

17:02

and you keep what you have at the time of our marriage.

17:05

And then you add in some things like if you

17:07

know.

17:08

You forgot you were you were in law before.

17:10

Yeah, so if you inherit, you know, money

17:12

from your family you added

17:14

into the prenup that you get to keep it. And

17:17

obviously I don't know if you had any inheritance

17:19

coming to you, but whatever you had

17:21

at the time is going to be yours

17:24

when you got married. And that's like I said, I all

17:26

I had was a house in a you know, a

17:29

bank account and a job. So

17:31

I was doing very well and it just didn't make any

17:33

sense that a prenup

17:35

would protect us or protect her

17:38

from from what you know, But

17:40

for you, I guess you know. What

17:42

I learned in this whole divorce

17:44

thing is if you are together

17:47

without a prenup or even a

17:49

wedding for ten years in California,

17:52

it's like being married. So you don't even need

17:54

to get married. You don't need a certificate, you don't even

17:56

need any of that. All your assets are

17:58

subject to you know, to a

18:00

divorce.

18:02

So oh, I don't know that you might as well be getting

18:04

married if you've been together for ten years, right,

18:06

right.

18:07

And I have a friend who got married in

18:09

Miami or in Florida, and

18:12

he had a bunch of assets and everything, and I

18:14

was happy to be at the wedding and everything. He was super

18:17

happy, and I think he got divorced a year later, and

18:20

ever since then he continued to build companies,

18:22

you know, make a lot of money.

18:25

And he had he had

18:27

a relationship with the girl, but he wasn't going

18:29

to marry her, and he made it clearly

18:32

and understanding with her that we're not going to ever

18:34

get married. So like, I get

18:36

it. I get it. You know, once you get screwed like

18:38

that, and you work your ass off so hard, right

18:41

you know, you know, I mean I don't know what the laws

18:43

are.

18:43

And well, that's what I never understood

18:45

is that if whether

18:48

it's the husband or the wife, right, let's

18:50

say it's the it's the wife in this case,

18:52

right, Yeah, she wakes up one

18:54

day three years later and she just tells you,

18:57

I don't love you anymore and I'm out and

19:00

maybe I found a new dude. Right,

19:02

Yeah, she can take half your stuff

19:05

even though she's the one that's leaving exactly.

19:07

And this is California. This is like, that's what's

19:09

crazy thing.

19:10

And I've always felt even if it's the other way, right, like, if

19:12

I decide to leave, yeah, and it's

19:14

I'm choosing to leave, then why,

19:17

it's like a double whammy. It's like an

19:19

insult to injury. You're going to leave

19:21

you and I'm still taking half your shit.

19:23

Yeah, So I mean it

19:26

happens. It happens a lot. I

19:28

think you were saying sixty percent of marriages and then

19:31

divorce, and I truly believe that number is accurate,

19:33

especially in California. You know, there's

19:35

so much distraction and so much entitlement.

19:38

And I

19:40

don't know how these guys do it

19:42

that have a ton of money and

19:45

date these young women and marry them,

19:47

you know what I mean, Like, why are you getting married?

19:50

Well, there must be some sort of really

19:52

ironclad bring

19:54

up that you know, if we get married, you're not

19:57

You might get X, Y and Z, but you're not going

19:59

to get at all, you know. And these guys

20:01

that are wealthy and you know, live that life and

20:04

don't care about life or money or anything

20:06

or love. They end up

20:08

getting divorced or and lose a little

20:10

bit of money. But I don't know how they continue

20:13

to do that. They get married over and over and over. I mean

20:15

there's been some celebrities that get married like

20:17

seven times. And you know, these movie

20:19

stars celebrities, they have a lot of money. So

20:22

how do they do They could afford,

20:24

like you said, they can afford to right, it's just got so much

20:26

money.

20:26

It's like, all, I get divorced three four times,

20:28

no matter.

20:29

Yeah, But to really

20:33

pinpoint the purpose behind marriage, you know,

20:36

I was always afraid

20:38

because it is a big deal.

20:40

It is a big commitment. It's almost like

20:42

the very first time I ever had a

20:45

not had to, but expressed to a

20:47

woman that I love you. You know, it's like, that's

20:49

that's so meaningful to me. I don't know if

20:51

I could just say it, you know, because

20:53

I don't know what love is. I was so young,

20:56

right, I don't know what impressed

20:59

me, impressed upon me, or who impressed

21:01

upon me to value

21:03

that so much that I just didn't want to give it

21:05

away. Right, I'm just not going to say I love you

21:07

just because maybe it's a family trait. I

21:09

don't know. I really valued

21:12

that. And then it came to, you know,

21:14

getting married as well. It's like I don't want to just

21:16

get married.

21:17

Yeah, By the way, what's your love language?

21:20

Words of affirmation and actions,

21:23

you know when when you know, not necessarily

21:25

gifts, but little things here and there.

21:28

I mean, Tara's really good about doing for me little

21:30

things here and there. When she makes me dinner, sometimes

21:33

she's doing it for me. She's not just making dinner

21:35

just to make dinner, you know what I mean. She asked me what I want.

21:38

She's real, she just really pays real attention

21:40

to what I like, what I don't like, and

21:42

she makes sure that you know it's going to be an enjoyable

21:44

dinner as opposed to oh yeah hungry,

21:46

Okay, well let's get door dash.

21:48

Jenny used to cook for me all the time before

21:51

we got married, and once we got married,

21:53

cooking was over. I

22:06

know that you said that. I

22:08

think it was on the show that you wanted a small

22:11

wedding, but then I think the

22:14

show found out that you were going to have a wedding,

22:16

so they offered to pay for it, and

22:18

then you made it, I think, a pretty

22:20

big wedding. So do you ever

22:22

think back of like what a small wedding

22:24

would look like for you?

22:27

I don't, and people

22:30

have asked me that many times, only because

22:34

I just I had such an amazing

22:36

experience with the wedding that was

22:39

produced and the way it all happened

22:42

when it was I think I told you when I was

22:44

presented to me, I was like, I don't want

22:46

to do this on TV. You know, based

22:48

on my experience with the Bravo Real

22:51

Housewife show, it's very toxic.

22:53

I don't want any drama, and

22:55

this is supposed to be a very special

22:57

thing for me.

22:58

Yeah, you got all the girls there, right, and.

23:00

Then all the girls there and all that. But it turned

23:02

out to be very well produced

23:05

and very little drama. Most of the drama

23:07

had to do with, you know, I want this

23:09

and she wants that, you know, and don't

23:13

spend too much money on the wedding, and okay,

23:15

let's not talk about the budget, you know. So it's

23:18

like, all right, those things really

23:20

are not important. I mean, I just didn't

23:22

want a

23:25

girl fighting at her wedding or throwing you

23:27

know, the table or some stupid like that just

23:29

to get ratings right, nor to

23:31

get attention. But

23:33

the way it all turned out, the

23:36

way it was all edited and produced and filmed,

23:38

and and the way the

23:42

wedding planner handled it all, she

23:44

really paid attention to what Tamra

23:46

was saying. She really understood

23:50

my desires on it. I mean, at

23:52

the time, for example, it was a little bit

23:54

of a pointer. At

23:56

the time, I was very much addicted to gummy

23:59

bears. Gummy bears were my vice and that's

24:01

what I love the most. And the wedding planner somehow

24:03

ended up getting gummy

24:06

bears all over the wedding hall and

24:08

these two or three i think five

24:11

pound gummy bears the size of a small

24:13

baby.

24:13

Right.

24:14

I'd never seen a gummy bear so big, and

24:17

so that was you know, I just one one

24:19

way to my heart and to impress

24:21

me, and another. You know, I was a

24:24

big road cyclist at the time. I

24:26

used to ride my bike everywhere, and

24:29

the wedding planner ended up finding

24:31

an old road bike and

24:34

hanging it from the rafters where we got

24:36

married and putting flowers and everything and painting

24:38

it so it matches. And I'm like,

24:40

wow, you know, you really thought

24:42

about all the things that bring you

24:44

know, happiness and value to me to

24:47

make this a real

24:50

wedding, a real experience, versus,

24:53

Oh, we're going to hire the most expensive chefs.

24:55

We're gonna hire the most expensive this. We're gonna

24:57

you know, have the Gucci this and you know

24:59

the pro of that, and

25:01

we're going to make it the most amazing wedding for TV.

25:04

You know that probably would

25:07

have been boring for me

25:09

and so fake and

25:11

empty that I probably would have wanted

25:14

a small wedding afterwards, you know, like

25:17

that's kind of what I was expecting. Also, like, hey,

25:19

let's just do a TV wedding for whatever

25:21

that is. Let's just get through it

25:23

and after that, and that was our plan. After

25:26

that, we'll have a small, little wedding, a real wedding

25:28

quote unquote, and call

25:30

it a day. But the wedding was so incredibly

25:33

put together, so real, so magical

25:35

that I don't regret anything

25:38

about it. And I'm you

25:40

know, the only way I would do

25:42

another small wedding is that maybe

25:44

we renew our valves.

25:47

But we've seen how that goes on on the show.

25:49

You know, people renew their vows and shit hits the

25:51

fan. Maybe we

25:53

should do it together and we

25:55

all we do it together. It's been thirteen

25:58

years. That would be awesome, like

26:00

a destination renew destination renewal.

26:02

Right, but that's pretty cool that you

26:05

got all these like special moments. Obviously

26:07

have your bathtub moment that you I'll always remember

26:09

on your whatever. I think it was the first date or

26:11

whatever. But what I mean, how magical

26:14

is that that you can go back and look at your wedding. I wish

26:16

I could go back and look at my Paris

26:19

wedding. I could look at pictures, but I

26:21

don't have like a video like you guys do. And

26:24

I mean that's that's the benefit of doing it through

26:26

the show, right they I mean when

26:28

I was on the show, that's what I liked

26:30

about it. I was like, Oh, I'm going to get all this footage with my kids,

26:33

and I'm going to be able to look back at that footage.

26:35

It's gonna be pretty cool.

26:36

So one of the one of the things I remember

26:39

having a decision on what the wedding was

26:43

because it was produced by a

26:45

production company. I'm

26:48

not going to have access to the footage. I'm not going to have access

26:50

to the photos, right, and if

26:53

I do, it's going to be whatever they want to give me. So

26:55

I ended up hiring a videographer

26:57

and a photographer. The photographer was a really close

27:00

friend of ours. She does weddings. She was

27:02

amazing, and she had connections

27:04

with a videographer who did a great job. So

27:07

the video that I watch

27:09

every year is the video that was produced for

27:12

us by this videographer, privately

27:14

videographer, and it

27:17

was so well done. I

27:19

think I watch it every year because

27:21

it brings lears to me. It

27:23

brings me back to that moment and

27:27

it's real.

27:28

Right.

27:28

I've watched our actual three part

27:31

series that Brable produced maybe

27:33

twice, and

27:36

it's not the same. It's not the same

27:38

as watching just this one clip

27:40

that I have on my phone that I can watch. It's like

27:42

an eight minute clip and I just watch

27:44

it every year and it just reminds me, and I think

27:47

subconsciously the reason

27:49

I watch it is because I

27:52

think one of the things I've experienced

27:54

in life is you kind

27:57

of take things you have for granted generally,

28:00

right, whether it's materialistic stuff

28:02

or relationships or even yourself,

28:05

your talents, your skills, and your abilities,

28:07

right, you kind of take them for granted. And

28:09

I know that if

28:12

it's out of sight, out of mind, they kind

28:14

of lose attention. And that's

28:17

happened with friendships, that's happened with

28:19

you know, even companies that I've had employees,

28:22

and all relationships in general. So

28:25

with this, I feel

28:27

like, if I don't bring

28:29

this to mine every year and remind

28:32

me how incredibly magical

28:34

that moment was, I might I might

28:36

lose it. I might lose that love,

28:39

I might lose I might start

28:41

taking it for granted, and I might lose that

28:43

magic I have with her. So maybe

28:45

that's talking to me subconsciously and

28:47

why I do it. But yeah, every

28:49

time I watch it, I do getteried,

28:52

and that was seriously. I was at

28:54

my visiting my grandmother just a

28:56

few days ago, and she's

28:59

kind of going, you know, she's going to be ninety nine years

29:01

old this year, so she's kind of having Alzheimer's

29:03

and in the conversations we have

29:05

are kind of like, oh, wait, did

29:07

you do you live in Mexico, Like,

29:10

well, no, I don't

29:12

live in Mexico. I'm about twenty five minutes away. So

29:15

I spent some time showing her some

29:17

videos of my new dog and you know, my

29:19

life. And then I came across the wedding video

29:22

and I'm like, oh, watch this, and

29:24

she was in the wedding. She was in the video,

29:26

and it just made

29:28

it that more magical to have

29:31

this content where

29:34

she was a big part of the wedding. She walked

29:36

down the aisle with me, she was

29:38

in the video. I watched her and

29:41

the impact was, you know, I

29:44

don't know when I'm going to lose her, but it's

29:46

not too long from now. So I

29:49

have her here, and I have my wife, and I have this

29:51

magic moment that's going to live with me for the rest

29:53

of my life. So there's so many

29:56

impactful reasons why I watched

29:58

that video, and I think that's why I get taridite,

30:00

because every time I watch it, I get taite.

30:03

Have you ever forgot your anniversary?

30:07

No, it's it's it's

30:09

kind of hard because you know, I have this

30:11

video reminds me it's on my calendar, and

30:14

I don't want to be that guy that forgets

30:16

it.

30:18

It's it's again very important

30:21

to me for the longevity of

30:23

our wedding, you know, of our marriage, of our

30:25

of our life together. This is this was

30:27

a big important part

30:30

in our life and I never want to forget it.

30:40

What about gifts? Does do gifts get you

30:42

nervous?

30:42

Like?

30:43

What do I get it this year? Like you

30:45

got to keep continuing to level

30:47

up? Or what it was?

30:49

It's like yes and

30:51

no, yes, because of

30:54

the social pressures. You know, it's

30:57

up there with this whole you gotta spend

30:59

thirty percent of your anial salary onto

31:01

a wedding. Shit, that was you know.

31:03

What I know now is that it was a marketing

31:06

scheme that was designed by the jewelry

31:08

company, the jewelry industry that convinced

31:11

guys to do that.

31:13

I'm glad I didn't fall for it. Because the times

31:15

I've given Teddy some really nice anniversary

31:18

presents, I'm like, all right, that's your anniversary,

31:21

that's your birthday, and

31:23

that's Christmas and that's

31:25

Valentine's everything. Ask

31:28

me for another present. I

31:30

go in there with my negotiation skills. Yeah.

31:33

The other thing is my

31:35

wife.

31:36

And this is one of the other reasons I love her

31:38

so much is that she is not high maintenance. She

31:41

personally won't spend stupid

31:43

money on herself. Like I'm the one that buys

31:46

her the two thousand dollars pair of shoes.

31:48

She won't do it, you know. And even

31:51

though she probably won't do

31:53

it, I went

31:55

out and bought her the six thousand dollars

31:58

stupid gold bracelet that go on her wrist

32:00

that locks down on Cardier. That's what it is,

32:02

Cardia. You know, she has these

32:04

things that she likes and

32:07

it's not it's not she doesn't

32:09

have an expensive habit of spending,

32:12

right, So even if I got her, I

32:14

mean, one year, I took a picture of

32:16

our wedding and had it not

32:19

laminated but printed on

32:21

this aluminum piece and hung

32:23

in our bedroom to remind her, Hey,

32:25

this is who we were, this is what happened that day,

32:28

and that was her anniversary present. You know. I

32:30

think it cost me like one hundred and fifty bucks

32:32

and that was it, you know, and she was super happy.

32:34

It's very sentimental because I put some thought into

32:37

it. And those are the

32:39

kind of gifts I like, by the way, Yeah, yeah,

32:41

because we get to see it.

32:42

Yeah, you could buy like for me,

32:45

like I could buy my own present if I want it, right,

32:47

But like those things I would never do for myself,

32:50

right, but they mean so much to me, right

32:52

if you took the time to like get

32:54

all these pictures together and maybe

32:57

took me down memory road, because it's something

32:59

that I normally want to do for myself.

33:00

So I like the kind of gifts that

33:03

I normally wouldn't do for myself,

33:06

right, Versus like clothes, I go

33:08

buy clothes if I want some, and I'm

33:11

very picky with clothes, so I want to buy my own clothes,

33:13

not yet what you bring me, and I'm like, oh damn,

33:15

I'm never going to wear this thing.

33:16

Right, So is that

33:18

kind of how your relationship is now where

33:21

you guys really don't buy each other presence.

33:23

It's just like I just had a birthday, right, yeah,

33:26

and you're gonna have a birthday soon.

33:27

So next week. Yeah,

33:30

but.

33:31

You know, I didn't want to do anything. I didn't want to go

33:33

anywhere. We ended up going to Big Beer, having a nice

33:36

just get away. I had a nice Italian

33:39

dinner. I even had dessert and

33:41

tried to, you know, kind of celebrate it. And

33:44

I think somebody asked, what did

33:46

you get for your birthday? I'm like, well, I don't

33:48

know what I want. You know, I kind of want a new Harley.

33:51

I don't know that I want to spend the money on a new Harley

33:53

because I already have a nice Harley. So it's

33:56

like I don't really want to buy myself

33:58

something expensive. I don't really know, So I

34:00

ended up getting nothing. Yeah,

34:03

you know, it's okay, though, It's okay, like

34:05

you I could just go get anything pretty much anything

34:07

I want, but yep, it's

34:10

just Stu.

34:12

Yeah no, And I think, uh, I think when

34:14

its like with me, I hate

34:17

the reason I hate Valentines and

34:19

I'm probably the worst at Valentine's. I

34:21

wish I could be a little more romantic during

34:23

Valentine's but I hate

34:25

someone telling me that I have to buy a

34:27

present or that I have to be romantic,

34:30

which is what Valentine's is. Like, I

34:32

want to buy a present because I feel

34:34

like it, not because it's Valentine's and

34:36

I'm pressured by

34:39

you know, someone who decided to make

34:41

that a commercial day so you can go spend a bunch of

34:43

money. I am so right there

34:45

me For me, it's hard to do it,

34:47

like I just like. But

34:50

but then randomly I'll come home and

34:52

I'll just get her a kick ass gift, you

34:55

know. Yeah, those are the gifts

34:57

I like because I'm like I wanted to. I

34:59

didn't have the pressure of it's

35:01

Valentines and it's this day,

35:03

so I got to get you a present, right, Anniversary

35:07

a little different, you got to sort of do something.

35:09

But my favorite, my favorite one now is now

35:11

I just tell Teddy, hey, I'm gonna take a shop

35:14

and let's go let her choose something,

35:16

and yeah, you can choose it for sometimes

35:18

and I just I like

35:21

seeing the joy that she gets

35:23

to pick out what she wants versus before

35:26

she was like you pick it out, And I

35:28

picked stuff out and I think she liked

35:30

it. But I actually like when I take

35:32

her and she could actually pick exactly what

35:34

she wants, what'd you do for

35:37

your tenth year anniversary?

35:40

That's an interesting question. I was just thinking about that

35:42

the other day. I don't really I

35:45

have a bad time memorizing the

35:47

years. I

35:49

know. I bought her an expensive freaking ring

35:51

that was one of those that's a two

35:53

year present for you, Teddy,

35:57

it's not an anniversary. That's a two

35:59

year present for you. Lasted

36:01

about six months. That's funny,

36:05

but it's funny. Now I have to, like, seriously, I

36:08

have to. It's almost like got to keep

36:10

count, because the other day she was like, you

36:12

didn't buy me anything for Valentine's

36:15

And then she said something like, oh, last Mother's

36:18

Day. Because Mother's Day's coming out. She

36:20

had me thinking that I didn't buy anything.

36:22

I'm like, did I not buy something for Mother's Day?

36:25

And then sure enough I go home and I saw

36:28

I remembered the shoes and

36:30

the glasses that I bought her, and

36:32

we were in Vegas. Now granted

36:35

I bought it early, so I bought

36:37

it. I think we were in Vegas April twenty eighth of

36:39

last year, and I specifically

36:42

said, all right, this is your Mother's Day

36:44

gift. I'm buying it early. And

36:48

then, of course for Mother's Day, I took her

36:50

to dinner or lunch or wherever we went, and

36:53

she's like, you didn't get me anything for Mother's Day. And

36:55

I remember. I'm like, man, damn, I don't get anything on Mother's

36:57

Day. And then luckily I remembered because

36:59

we were with another couple and they're like, yeah, I remember

37:02

you were. Because we're going back and forth. Did

37:04

I get her a present? Did I not? I'm like, dude, I

37:06

know I got you a present. And

37:08

then finally the other couple's like, yeah, we were in Vegas.

37:11

Remember you bought her this, this, this, And I'm like,

37:13

yes, it was just April twenty eighth. And

37:16

I get so excited that I

37:18

want to give the gift right away. Yeah

37:21

right, versus let's wait another ten days from

37:23

other's day, right. Yeah. So anyway,

37:25

that's the next one I got coming. I gotta figure

37:27

out what I'm getting from Mother's Day.

37:31

So much pressure. I know, in a

37:33

perfect world, don't get me anything.

37:36

I will get you anything. We'll call it a day. Yeah,

37:38

one least thing we got to worry about.

37:40

Yeah, but I.

37:42

It doesn't work that way.

37:42

Here's another reason why we're so much alike, because

37:45

when you were talking about you know, you can

37:47

buyer anything anytime. I

37:49

just learned that concept.

37:52

I was shopping for I

37:54

think Christmas or something like that, and

37:57

I found a gift. I

37:59

was shopping and I saw this really cute jacket

38:01

that I thought all my wife would love it, and

38:04

I bought the jacket. I saved

38:06

it in the garage and a bag, you

38:08

know, and I said, I'm going to give it to her for Valentine's

38:11

Day, And the whole time I wanted to give it

38:13

to her, like I just, I just I don't need to.

38:15

Valentine's get so excited.

38:16

Yeah, you gets so excited because I really think she'd

38:19

look cute on it. And I

38:21

felt really proud that I did

38:23

this because I saw something that reminded

38:25

me of her that would look super cute on her. And

38:29

sure enough, you know, I was dying and Valentine's

38:33

came and I gave her the gift and I was super

38:35

excited, like, Okay, I think I could do it this

38:37

way because when it comes to thinking,

38:41

okay, Mother's Days next week and back,

38:44

when am I going to get I haven't thought about it, and

38:46

you know, I got to go rush out and get something

38:48

and as stressful, and then you

38:51

might get something that's stupid and she'll

38:53

be mad.

38:53

At you if you exactly.

38:56

I don't want her to be mad at me exactly.

38:59

Hey have you looked at some of the reviews

39:02

that we've had on our podcast? I

39:04

have not. I need to do a better job of that. I'll

39:07

read a couple and then we'll move on because I.

39:09

Hope they're good. Or should we just

39:11

read the bad ones? There are no bad

39:13

ones. There's no bad ones bad ones.

39:16

Thank you guys for now leaving negative ones.

39:18

And you know what we want the truth. You know, the

39:20

truth won't kill us. So

39:24

this first review is from C Sanders excellent

39:27

podcast, The Eds. We're

39:29

both well spoken, wonderful introduction, looking

39:32

forward to listening all the time. The ladies, Tamer

39:34

and Teddy should be very proud of their

39:36

husbands. The boys did a phenomenal job.

39:39

Pretty cool, right, Yeah, that's pretty cool. Here's

39:41

another one bad for some first timers.

39:44

You two truly are better halves lol.

39:48

I know. Really enjoyed

39:50

the podcast, appreciated the honesty and humbleness.

39:53

Edwin's story is worth sharing everywhere, being

39:55

an example that no matter where you come from

39:58

or what you've gone through are not defined.

40:01

You are not defined by those circumstances.

40:03

Totally on your side.

40:05

Super cool. I love that.

40:06

Yeah, I'm going to read one more just just a call

40:08

today and we'll end with this

40:11

great swing at the first pitch.

40:15

Great first show.

40:16

I really enjoyed listening to both of your stories

40:18

from your early childhoods. You came across

40:20

very interesting and comfortable, which gave you,

40:23

which gave your first podcast a real sense

40:25

of ease. Bravo, no

40:27

pun intended. I look forward

40:29

to learning more about you both, and you

40:32

are taking a life your

40:34

take on life and all it has

40:36

to offer. Congrats on an excellent show.

40:40

So very cool.

40:41

I don't know how you feel about that, but I feel pretty

40:43

good. You know, I didn't know what's good start. Yeah,

40:45

I got better, I think, yeah, we

40:47

could only get better from here. And another

40:50

thing, you know, you guys that are listening

40:52

to us, tell us what you want to once to

40:54

talk about. You know what you want to hear from us, and if

40:57

there's anything you know, nothing's off the table.

40:59

Were willing to talk about anything except

41:01

politics and religion? Yes, awesome,

41:06

great talking to you, bud I

41:08

hope.

41:08

Uh.

41:08

Likewise, yeah, I hope you're doing well and

41:11

we'll talk soon.