0:00

Alright , here's another episode of Express .

0:02

Lane Podcast with Kevin Stan

0:04

. What's going on ? Everybody , Just

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the two of us . We got plenty to talk about

0:08

.

0:09

Kind of Mostly Kev carrying the show . Well

0:11

, like every time , stan is just

0:13

Sometimes I've got some anti-government stuff to

0:15

talk about .

0:16

Yeah , I know , stan is just what I can bounce my own

0:18

ideas off of . Back to myself .

0:20

That's exactly what I think about you . I'm just like

0:22

hey , Kev , tell us a story so I can give you my opinions

0:24

on things . Knock them in the middle , Fuck

0:26

them up .

0:28

I'm having this fucking great dude .

0:32

I've seen the signs . You've been seeing another

0:34

mom .

0:37

Back when Halo 2

0:39

was like the game , we'd

0:42

be playing like up late at night in summer time

0:44

playing Halo 2 . And

0:46

all the time there's like we'd have

0:48

a group of or maybe it was Halo 3 . But either way we'd

0:50

have , like you know , eight of us like

0:52

all in one lobby , like playing together

0:55

, and they'd be like Kevin

0:57

, what the fuck are you and Mike doing ? Because we'd just

0:59

be standing there and we would have , you know , hit the

1:01

TV input button and

1:03

I think it was like

1:06

ABC Family at the time . You

1:09

still like from like 10 at night

1:11

to like one in the morning would just play Malcolm in the middle . So

1:14

we'd just be watching like the game would start

1:16

and we'd just be like on the other input watching

1:20

Malcolm in the middle . And they were just like what the fuck guys ?

1:21

Come on Like oh shit , right , and

1:24

now you've got two screens you can do that with . Yeah , exactly yeah

1:27

, that shows , I don't . I think maybe

1:29

it's underrated like because

1:32

the theme song is like one of the most memorable ones you can think

1:34

of . And

1:36

who's poor

1:38

Frankie Moona's ? Who's the

1:40

Ezra in the

1:42

gun ? Running movie Seth from

1:45

.

1:48

Like the voices ? No Fuck .

1:50

What's his name ? Fat guy ? He

1:53

was just in that movie where he's like with a black

1:55

girl .

1:57

Oh , Jonah Hill yeah .

1:59

I really tried not to say the fat guy , because

2:01

you know he's sensitive and stuff Like he's

2:03

ever going to hear this , jonah . Hill's fast . Well

2:05

, yeah , but the point is like , like

2:08

they I guess text messages were just leaked or something

2:10

of like him and his ex-girl and it's just like

2:12

just super embarrassing . It's just like you

2:15

got to stop hanging out late nights with Frankie

2:18

Moona's and

2:20

these sleepovers are a little ridiculous

2:22

.

2:23

He had like insecure fat guy energy

2:25

with a hot chick . Like that was never going to work out

2:27

. Poor guy .

2:30

I just thought that was funny . Frankie Moona's race

2:33

car driver .

2:35

Yeah , now he is , he's like killing it , I think .

2:37

And then the other dude , the oldest brother's

2:39

hides . Brother in real life , I think

2:42

, yeah , like the master Danny

2:44

.

2:44

Masterson was was hide in

2:46

that 70s show . He's going to jail ? Yeah

2:48

, allegedly no , I think

2:50

like I think the conviction came down

2:52

.

2:53

Like he is going to jail . Was

2:57

he part of that scam ? The the

2:59

um Colter it just , he was just doing his own .

3:01

No , no , I think he was out there on his own , he's

3:03

just molesting on his own , clangin' and bangin' .

3:05

Yeah , oh

3:07

, poor guy

3:09

Got caught up .

3:10

Yeah , I mean , yeah , you use all

3:12

that that 70s show , power and influence

3:15

. That's where he ended . And then you get on that

3:17

that Ashton Kutcher Netflix

3:20

show .

3:20

Yeah , he did come back on that . Huh , that

3:23

was what Sam uh Elliot

3:25

, ashton Kutcher and him , and

3:27

I've never seen a clip of that show .

3:29

I think Britt watched it for a little bit and I like

3:32

walked through and was like , oh look , that's all like

3:34

some pretty big people and then just kept going . I was

3:36

like not for me .

3:38

No , Um , just

3:40

watched . Uh , I got two episodes left

3:42

of the Witcher .

3:43

Oh , I didn't start the the part two

3:45

of this season , Like we watched

3:47

the part one , which fuck everything

3:50

.

3:50

I didn't even notice that there were parts .

3:51

but yeah no , they dropped like the first

3:53

five episodes of the season three and then they're

3:55

like wait for round for part two . And I was like fuck

3:58

, just give us everything . Either fucking

4:01

do a whole season and give

4:03

it to us right away , or go

4:05

week by week and just let us deal with

4:07

the you know the week by weakness of

4:09

it . It just fuck this . Here's

4:12

your first part of the season . Wait six months

4:14

and it's not a new season , it's the same

4:16

season that you just want to draw out Like what

4:19

the fuck ?

4:21

So there's 10 episodes total , right . So

4:23

did I just wait long enough to get both of them .

4:26

Yeah , okay , it was like three or four

4:28

, Like it was either it was like a month or just less

4:30

than a month that they were like

4:32

. The rest of the episodes are coming , then

4:34

and then then any new seasons will be

4:36

different guy . Yeah , it's going to be

4:38

Liam Hemsworth .

4:42

Man , the dude's so good though

4:44

.

4:45

And he's like a nerd Like Henry Cavill

4:48

was like super , like plays video

4:50

game Like Cavill .

4:52

Cavill , I don't know , superman

4:55

slash Butcher . Yeah that dude .

4:58

But he's like a nerd , like he's super

5:01

into playing like games on his computer

5:03

, like Warhammer , like

5:05

the tabletop game not even like the computer

5:08

version . Like he paints like little mini figurines

5:10

, as into D&D and shit . So he's

5:13

like connected to , like he played

5:15

the Witcher video games and stuff , like he knows

5:17

the material .

5:18

That's pretty cool , he's not just like acting about

5:20

it .

5:21

He's like , oh , this shit is awesome .

5:23

Yeah , I mean great Witcher . I mean

5:25

the show was a little

5:27

little off sometimes because like

5:29

you're expecting like Game of Thrones

5:31

, like when you're in watching Game of Thrones , like you're

5:33

in it like everything is like that

5:35

time period like that goofy the

5:38

Witcher is like kind of they try to play a little

5:40

goofy , especially with the guy that sings and

5:42

stuff . Also , that took

5:44

a weird turn . I'm like . I don't know if that was

5:46

necessary .

5:48

Like that's weird . I think that's

5:50

just be part of being a bard .

5:51

They never like they're . I wonder I never

5:53

picked that character .

5:57

But no , it's , it's . It's its own thing

5:59

and it's it's not that it fell

6:01

off . It's that the first season was

6:03

so good because of the , the

6:05

timing misdirection of

6:07

everything , which spoilers . If

6:09

you didn't watch season one yet , you know fog

6:12

off kind of . But

6:15

like , and that's a fuck

6:17

, what else has done this shit ? Like ?

6:19

that what weren't like the misdirection ?

6:21

Yeah , where . But just like

6:23

, the timelines don't add up and

6:25

you're like you're thinking it's all in one timeline

6:27

and then by the last episode you're like , oh

6:30

fuck , like that shit was all like 70

6:32

years in the past .

6:33

I even watched , I even burned through the

6:35

origins . That was all right .

6:38

I heard that one was was okay . I didn't watch that

6:40

one .

6:40

More goofy . It was more like the

6:42

monster was fucking really goofy , like

6:44

just you guys didn't even try . Like here's some

6:46

some CGI we let the the

6:48

interns make and this monster makes

6:51

no sense there's

6:53

an animated one that's like probably

6:55

better .

6:56

Oh , it was really good .

6:57

It's all .

6:57

it's all about the like

6:59

Vesemir , the older witcher

7:02

that train the

7:05

White Wolf . What's his name ?

7:06

I don't know

7:09

. I honestly I can't keep track of all the

7:11

names of the places and the people . When

7:13

they just talk about stuff , I'm just like , oh yeah

7:15

, probably that one place , that it

7:17

is .

7:17

It is very Game of Thrones-esque like that , where it's

7:19

like there's a whole continent of names and

7:21

like places and people and you're like if

7:24

you don't really , at least for me they sound a lot like similar

7:26

If I don't read it , like if I see it on

7:29

like Paper spelled out , like

7:31

okay , but when they're just like oh yeah , that place

7:33

in this place and that person who lives oh yeah , that's

7:35

Gerald of Riverdale .

7:36

Yeah , gerard , gerard .

7:38

Gerard , gerard . Yeah , whatever

7:40

him it's like the

7:42

animated movie is all about like his mentor

7:45

, how he became a witcher and like all

7:47

that kind of shit . That one's good .

7:48

I just now like figured out , like , oh , they

7:51

call all the sorcerers like , um

7:53

, what do they call them ? The brother

7:55

, the brotherhood ? I was like oh they're the brotherhood

7:57

, Okay the chicks got it . Season

7:59

three yeah

8:02

, it's just a Alright cool

8:04

. Just show me who the bad guys are , who

8:06

the good guys are , and then we'll just figure it out

8:09

from there . But , yeah , pretty good , but

8:11

I got two episodes left on that , so I'm pretty . Yeah

8:13

, sucks , cuz it's like now I want

8:15

to wait , because now how long am I to wait

8:17

?

8:17

a year two years All right , but this

8:20

writer is an actor . Strike probably even

8:22

longer yeah .

8:24

I do . I did watch a couple of interviews with the Bard

8:26

. They're trying to get

8:29

a sound bite at them for like switching the character

8:31

and it's just like well , I don't know . I think they're

8:33

both just like really great and this

8:36

I'm happy to have a job .

8:38

I like . I have no doubt that Liam

8:40

Hemsworth will do an awesome job , like he's

8:42

a good actor , but we

8:44

already had somebody that was there and committed . It's like

8:47

just like why it's like in that reason In that

8:49

70s show when they change Eric's

8:51

sister , it's just like don't say like , at least

8:53

this were like , hey , like he's come , they

8:55

said something that Other

8:57

a bunch of other times just like , yeah , that person's out

8:59

like here's the sister .

9:01

I was in like that's a new person . What

9:03

are we doing ? What was the reason that ? You know

9:05

the reason for you got other shit going on .

9:07

Yeah , I think so . I had other commitments that

9:09

he had Committed

9:11

to and that's Witcher talk .

9:14

It's funny cuz like playing with the friends like

9:16

they would never watch , like they they'll

9:18

watch . They barely watch Game of Thrones . And then

9:20

like maybe they'll watch , they will watch

9:23

. What's the other one with Uhtred , son

9:25

of Uhtred the kingdom ? They'll watch

9:27

that , but like you know the

9:29

Witcher oh , it's based on video game not watching

9:31

that .

9:32

No , it's based on our books first

9:34

.

9:34

Well , nobody reads books there , Kevin .

9:37

Well , I didn't even know it was based on books . I thought it was

9:39

based on the video game and I was playing

9:41

the video game and like looking up stuff and

9:43

yeah . It's all based on books .

9:44

Then you gotta go read them .

9:46

No Older new like

9:48

for Game of Thrones area like

9:50

started in like the 90s or something .

9:53

What else yeah ?

9:54

I watched . We were right . We finished up

9:56

last week . The finale , the secret

9:58

invasion and good is alright

10:00

. I it was really good . I thought up until

10:03

the last episode and then the last episode

10:05

just kind of went off the rails . Yeah

10:07

, yeah it was just like it was

10:09

. It's all like Nick Fury

10:11

, so it's not like super

10:13

hero-esque , it's very much more

10:15

spy thriller , double-cross

10:18

type of deal , which was really cool . It's

10:20

just a different , like it's Marvel

10:23

, but it's not like Captain America

10:25

kicking down a door and like doing

10:27

flips while like punching people through a

10:29

wall and shit Like it's . It's very

10:31

much like master spy

10:33

type of shit . Until

10:35

the last episode , and then it was just like alright , you

10:38

guys are blowing the budget and just had

10:40

some sort of idea here . That really didn't

10:42

pan out .

10:43

See , that sounds terrible . I'll never watch this shit

10:45

.

10:46

It just didn't fit with the rest of the Flow

10:49

of the TV show like I needed

10:51

it .

10:52

I want to see the dude fuck the bad guys up , like

10:54

not like all spy and Chris

10:56

Cross , and then at the end one big fight , like Like

10:58

the extraction movie , for instance , like the

11:01

first one . He's just killing everybody

11:03

. Oh , that's what there's no spy

11:05

shit like fuck that , get out of

11:07

here with that yeah like the born identities

11:09

and all that shit .

11:10

Where ?

11:10

yeah , but he's fucking up people the whole time though .

11:13

Yeah , but it's not like he's

11:15

out there killing an entire town

11:17

of peace . Yeah , like one person at a time

11:19

. That's like oh shit , jason Bourne . Oh

11:22

, you fucking figured me out now . You got to die , I

11:25

guess . Yeah .

11:26

I don't . I never liked any of those spy

11:28

stuff , or it's just all too slow and too

11:31

.

11:32

I love like that thriller suspense like

11:35

did you Watch

11:37

no country for old men ?

11:39

Yeah , yes , yeah did you like ? That one I

11:43

did , but I remember thinking

11:46

like man , this is slow , see , I

11:48

loved it , cuz it was so slow and you're like

11:50

holy like I , like the parts of the guy

11:52

are they . Are they gonna get this dude ?

11:54

Like is he ? Like was it Tommy

11:57

Lee's ? Just like about to retire ? Like

11:59

is he gonna even give a fuck about this case ?

12:02

What's the other movie ? Where they're in Texas and they're

12:04

chasing a bank robber , he's trying to save his farm

12:07

and it's got a the

12:09

hell's it . Have in it bunch

12:11

of people . Jeff Bridges , that one

12:13

was kind of like similar

12:15

to no country for old men , but like you

12:17

didn't see it , it's like two Detectives

12:21

and this guy's robbing robbing

12:24

a chain of banks

12:26

but he took out like a loan on

12:28

himself or something . Then they were gambling

12:30

it so they could say they claimed it from gambling and

12:32

he saved his farm . Anyway

12:34

, that was pretty good movie as well .

12:36

But no country for old men came out

12:38

. I was like , fuck , I want to go see this movie . And

12:41

I was on , like me and my mom we're

12:43

took a trip up to Vermont to go look at colleges

12:45

. And she's like , well , what are we gonna do tonight ? I

12:47

was like , oh , we go to the movies that you weren't gonna go

12:49

to . Well , no , and

12:52

I had to keep my options

12:54

open of what I'm gonna turn down . Uh-huh

12:57

, I was like , oh , there's no country for old

12:59

men movie . And she was like , oh yeah , I did see

13:01

that . I think I might want to , you know , go watch that . I was

13:03

like , oh shit , like not what I expected , so

13:05

we go see it . And we walk out was like , holy

13:07

fuck , like that movie was great , just the way

13:10

that ends and Just

13:12

it's over and there's really is no

13:14

resolution to the movie . Like I love that shit .

13:16

Like maybe I that's part . I didn't like , say

13:18

I like first fucking .

13:20

Every movie is like up here , it is the tide

13:22

, the happy ending wrapped up in a bow , like sometimes

13:25

it's just like that shit does . It doesn't happen

13:27

, it doesn't work out so

13:29

I was like walk as damn , that was awesome

13:31

. I look at my mom , she's like that is not

13:33

the movie . It was the same time when

13:36

that movie with was

13:39

like Morgan Freeman

13:41

and Robert

13:43

De Niro is like the the

13:46

. It was like old men escaping

13:48

like a retirement home to go to Vegas and

13:51

she thought that's what no country for old men

13:53

was . So she was like oh , this , like

13:55

quirky , like comedy movie

13:57

about old people was not what

13:59

she sat down and watch .

14:02

So when he's blasting that fucking poor cashier

14:04

? Yeah , I Just

14:07

saw the scene the other day where he walks into the office

14:09

and shoots the guy and the other guy standing there

14:11

like Are you gonna kill me ? So

14:14

? That depends , do

14:16

you see me Fantastic

14:18

?

14:19

What's the guy's name ? The actor Was

14:21

a Harvey air Bardham .

14:24

I don't know , I knew it was some hard in

14:26

French , right ? Well , I think

14:28

Spanish . But okay , good point . Well

14:31

, something like that .

14:34

So we got back from thank you vacation

14:36

and and had

14:38

like the week from . We're down the beach

14:40

, had the week , and then during the week brings like I

14:42

think I'm gonna go back down the beach and take

14:45

Winston while there there's nobody

14:47

in the house , so it'll just be us and we can Like

14:51

take him to the beach and like we'll have

14:53

like a vacation with when . So I was like alright

14:55

, fine , like go back to the beach , I go

14:57

get some burn again and we invite

14:59

two of our friends , we go go down

15:01

and then we're just for the weekend in

15:03

Ocean cities , no bars

15:05

or like nightlife . So Saturday night we're

15:07

like let's head up to sea aisle .

15:09

And you can't drink on the beach right . Because kids

15:11

are ruining it .

15:12

No , you can . You just have to throw it in a Coosie

15:14

and not like get shit-faced . Well

15:17

, cuz I was do that , for that I was

15:19

definitely drinking on the beach , but we're like , let's head up

15:21

to sea aisle will go out and then first . But

15:24

then somebody's got to drive . Yeah , but you

15:27

know , wasn't me . Sorry , britt , no

15:29

, she didn't drive . Are my buddy's

15:32

fiance drove ?

15:32

There you go . You gotta work for it .

15:34

Um , so we're doing , we're going up there . I was

15:36

like , you know , if we had just like hung

15:38

out in Ocean City , we went to the

15:40

boardwalk and did whatever we could out in Ocean

15:43

City , I feel like there's a zero

15:45

percent chance we were gonna run into anybody we

15:47

know . But now we're going out to sea

15:49

aisle so we can hit the bar is like it . Just I

15:51

don't say we're definitely going to , but the

15:53

chances of seeing somebody we know is going

15:55

up a lot and and

15:57

we walk into the first bar

16:00

. We go to like this beach bar at the point

16:02

and we walk in and immediately this

16:04

was like , oh my god , kevin and Britt , and

16:07

it was like one of Britney's mom's friends

16:09

. We're like hanging out at the bar and they're like oh

16:11

, you guys like fucking . I knew it , we're

16:14

for somebody cooler . Even

16:16

I didn't want to see anybody .

16:17

Oh , really , I love that . I feel like fucking

16:19

Bert when that cut like I , like Bert

16:23

, sometimes is kind of annoying with shit , but like

16:25

that is one of my feet , that's one of my

16:27

things that I'm like also like oh , oh

16:29

, like we're going out about like man , I hope

16:32

I see people like so cool seeing people

16:34

out and about when I'm drinking way cooler

16:36

than when I'm sober .

16:37

I guess I mean if I had to do it

16:39

sober or drunk , like definitely

16:42

drunk for sure .

16:42

I mean that's most things .

16:45

Sounds like a problem .

16:46

It's what she keeps saying , like

16:49

no , it's not .

16:52

So we go out to that one bar and we

16:54

get something to eat and we're hanging out . There's

16:56

a live band that you should totally

16:58

like . Talk to Dinah and any

17:01

of these people from up here and really go , just go

17:03

they're down there this week Just

17:05

like hit up bars down in .

17:07

Yeah , they see Iowa Wildwood they fucking went down

17:10

north Wildwood Friday

17:12

night and then Saturday night they were up at a creek

17:14

in limmer .

17:16

Creek side , just because it's like the band that was

17:18

playing was like , yeah , they're all right , but wait

17:20

there , dinah would be better .

17:22

They there's a band everybody keeps

17:24

talking about fat mezz . Have you seen anything

17:26

about them ? They're like that's what

17:28

they're kind of doing , them and Triple

17:31

rail run or some shit like that , like

17:34

two hot chicks as like the front girls , like

17:36

, oh , wearing like shorts

17:38

, like , but also they probably sound

17:40

pretty good , like they're . They're doing that whole

17:42

like exactly what you're saying , like a triangle

17:44

, like doing the beach scene , coming back

17:46

up here and then down in a delco

17:49

. Okay , yeah , yeah

17:51

, man , like we've said it before , but we live in a pretty

17:53

good area where it's like , dude , we'll be seeing

17:55

all these people come through , like there's a lot

17:58

of people out of this area .

17:59

Mm-hmm . One of them got to make it and

18:01

we'll know them Hopefully you

18:04

know it'd be the one person that's like I'm not doing that stupid

18:06

ass , fucking podcast .

18:07

Well , no , not even that . Just you know them

18:09

through Whatever , like

18:12

you know , like how many people we met just

18:14

through them , like met people

18:16

like through work that you'd never think of , like oh well

18:18

, yeah , that's my daughter's a Cousin

18:21

or something like that . Oh , all right , cool yeah

18:24

. But no .

18:26

So then we go from that

18:28

bar to another bar that we walk

18:31

in this like $10 cover , like okay

18:33

covers , yeah , cuz there was

18:35

like a band and shit . So , like

18:37

but it's what is like 920

18:40

, almost 930 , and we like get

18:42

$10 , fucking fine . So we go in and

18:45

it's like dead inside like fucking

18:47

$10 , cover for this . And then my

18:49

buddy's fiance is like , should we just leave ? Like no

18:51

, we just fucking paid $10 to be here . Like now

18:53

we're like fucking here , we're gonna figure

18:56

it out , and the bar was cash

18:58

only . So I was like ah , gee , like on 2023

19:01

cash .

19:01

Oh yeah , we got the ATM over there . Who's 10

19:03

hours are ?

19:04

charge . Who's skimming off the top ? Here

19:06

, somebody 100% , but

19:08

it did like after like 20 minutes

19:11

. We beat the rush , I guess because Then

19:13

I got 20 minutes of us being there

19:15

, like it got fucking packed and we

19:17

were at this like really

19:19

weird age to be there , because

19:22

we were too old and too

19:24

young At the same time to be

19:26

hanging out in the bar , because it's like everybody

19:28

was older or a lot younger . And Then

19:31

people were coming up these kids , well , and we

19:33

like got a corner spot on the bar , so we're

19:35

just like taking up space and people are like can we

19:37

get in there ? I'm like fuck off , like no . Should

19:40

have got here early , exactly . And

19:43

then I was like man , like all these kids are like 21

19:45

. They're like how can you tell is like cuz they're all coming up . And they're

19:47

like , can I get a shot like a grape vodka ? Man

19:51

, grow like you don't know that you can get like a

19:54

good drink and have it

19:56

have alcohol at the same time .

19:58

Yeah , no , it's . I mean I'm , I'm

20:00

even like I do kind

20:02

of like going to I used to I used

20:04

to be really anti go to Westchester , like if

20:06

I'm going to Westchester like you guys can drop me off

20:09

at , like the Eagles Club , I'll

20:11

be there like Maybe after

20:13

I get drunk there . Then I'll venture out and , like you

20:15

know , look at girls at the other bars

20:17

, but there's no way I'm just hanging

20:20

out like I hate those places

20:22

. But now , as I'm getting older , bars

20:24

actually aren't that bad . Like

20:26

you know , go sit at the bar , have a drink like

20:29

a loser . So

20:31

I'm coming around on that . But the clubs or the

20:33

places where young people hang out , like I still don't

20:36

have any real desire to go to those .

20:37

Even from when I was 21 until now and

20:39

, I'm sure , into the future , I would

20:41

rather be at a dive bar where everyone

20:45

looks at me like who the fuck is this new person

20:47

walking in here ?

20:48

Yeah , usually it's the same old ten drunks . What are you doing

20:50

here ? But that's my people .

20:52

Young , non-drunk . That's the people I can

20:54

get . I can make ten , you know . I'll have a hundred

20:56

percent success rate of making friends

20:58

at a bar like that .

21:01

We need to go to the bar . We haven't

21:03

drunk together like really drank .

21:05

Not really , since we've known each other .

21:07

Maybe that's why we're still friends . Maybe we'll

21:09

keep it that way .

21:10

I mean , we were out at what's it called Screwballs

21:14

at one time . We were out for the night .

21:17

I think you had to go , didn't you ?

21:18

The one , the one . Yeah

21:20

, that was the well , we've been to screwballs a couple

21:22

of times together and the one of them was

21:25

like I drove straight

21:27

from work so I got two beers in

21:29

me . You're not doing nothing , Getting out of here , Maybe

21:32

like the Phillies game and shit .

21:34

Ah , yeah , yeah , I guess , so I was keeping it under control

21:36

.

21:38

But so now we're there and I'm just like looking around

21:41

and I will absolutely blame fucking

21:43

the new Top Gun for this . There's a

21:45

fucking every . All these fucking little kids

21:47

, you know little 21 year olds like

21:49

fucking . These kids Clarify , yeah

21:52

, but they all , all these fucking kids think they're

21:54

like oh , now it's cool to rock a mustache . Like

21:57

no , it's like yeah fucking kids with mustaches

22:00

all over the place and like dude , like . And

22:02

people look at me and they're like , oh , nice mustache . Like

22:05

, yeah , top Gun , like , no , fuck you . Like . This

22:07

was for years before Top Gun Like

22:09

. People were like , oh my God , gross mustache

22:11

. And now it's just cool and everyone's

22:13

like , oh , you're hopping on the train . It was like no , I was

22:15

way before this train . And

22:18

now everyone's just like , oh , you're taking the trend .

22:20

So what should the new trend be Like ? What's not

22:22

cool ?

22:24

Besides Hitler , they

22:26

get a Hitler .

22:27

Bringing it back .

22:29

I prefer to call it the Charlie Chaplin

22:31

, but .

22:32

I mean , what about mutton chops ? You don't see too many people with mutton

22:35

chops , or there's a guy at work that

22:37

has like fucking long ones that just come down

22:39

, but he's shaved right here . I guess

22:41

there's also still mutton chops , just really long

22:43

yeah .

22:45

I guess looking stupid isn't stupid anymore

22:47

.

22:48

Yeah , you can say that I

22:52

see this poor fucking , these clips

22:54

of fucking poor Ben Margera like hanging

22:57

out with these two dudes that do they're

23:00

wearing I don't even know what the fuck's going on in

23:02

the video Like

23:04

poor dude he needs fucking help man , what

23:07

a fucking fall . Yeah , that's like

23:09

over and over . He's just like watching

23:11

somebody fall down steps , but the steps are just

23:14

like really really long they just

23:16

keep going .

23:17

Yeah , it's tough and you

23:19

kind of feel for him where he's

23:21

like . He's got mental illness but

23:23

like that , but he's kind of just like living

23:26

. I mean , he's like one of them , you're

23:28

I'm sure everybody has the friend that refuses

23:30

to grow up when you're 17

23:33

, 18 , that's kids , a

23:36

jackass . and then everybody grows

23:38

up , gets a job , has a

23:40

house and responsibilities and you're like

23:42

, oh , I can't be doing this shit . And the other guy's like , no

23:44

way , man , we used to do this all the time . I

23:46

think Bam is just kind of living that jackass

23:49

life and he's getting mad at

23:51

Knoxville and the rest of them . For me , like you

23:53

guys are pussies now .

23:56

It's 30 years later , bro yeah

23:58

.

23:58

It's time to evolve . But I will

24:00

say like it's sad and

24:02

obviously Bam , if you're

24:04

hearing this which you're not , get some

24:06

help dude , just like figure it out . But

24:09

a video where he's like out

24:11

in LA doing whatever and then he's like

24:13

he's threatening to do crack until

24:16

he dies unless he gets to see his son

24:18

, oh , what a threat

24:20

.

24:22

Yeah , I know .

24:22

It's like all right guys . And then he just

24:25

dropped a diss track .

24:26

And I think with those dudes is like these two

24:28

dudes that wear these shirts or hoodies that

24:30

say something about 2016 or something . They're

24:33

like super corny , they're like island boys , except

24:35

for like what ?

24:37

Which one of them island boys just came out as gay . That

24:39

popped up on my Instagram .

24:40

I don't think he's coming out as gay . He's born that

24:42

way .

24:43

But yeah , he just admitted to the world that that's

24:45

coming out .

24:46

All right . What when they were making out with each other ? I

24:48

don't know .

24:49

He's like I , like dude , you know . Whatever , look

24:51

at my dumb face .

24:54

Oh man , crazy in today's world . I'd

24:57

be shocked if somebody came out straight Like

24:59

that's the thing that would be funny today , like , oh

25:01

man , what a weirdo , you only

25:03

like the opposite checks . Next you're going to

25:05

tell me you're going to be with one person your whole life , poser

25:09

. Oh , so Continue

25:11

on .

25:11

Sorry , keep carrying no , no

25:13

, no back to the club and

25:16

before that band comes on there's just a DJ

25:18

playing a set , like waiting for 10 o'clock

25:20

or whenever the band was supposed to start . And

25:22

you remember , like I remember Mythbusters doing

25:25

something about it and like it's been like one

25:27

of these things in the ethos

25:29

of like the brown note

25:31

. You know I'm talking about when I say that .

25:33

No .

25:35

So it's . They tested on Mythbusters they're supposedly

25:37

had did it to like all these like drug , you

25:39

know cartel leaders and stuff . When they have them

25:41

like hold up inside a house

25:44

and they're like barricaded in , is

25:46

you like hit like this base

25:48

level ? Note that like the vibrations

25:50

just cause you to shit your pants .

25:53

Okay .

25:55

And like I only bring this up because we're

25:57

at the bar and the bass hits on one

25:59

song , I was

26:01

like oh . God like it . Just it didn't make me

26:03

shit my pants , but it rattled some

26:05

stuff enough that I was like it's got to get cleared

26:08

. All right , so does

26:10

the brown note exist . So Mythbusters

26:12

Almost .

26:15

Or you just like right on the speaker and it just you know

26:17

you should All right .

26:20

I look I didn't shit my pants

26:22

but it shook some stuff loose .

26:24

I'll tell you like was

26:26

the bathroom packed or no ? No

26:28

, Okay .

26:29

So it was just you .

26:29

It was just you . You just had to shit .

26:31

Yeah , I was just able to go take a dump .

26:34

Did you do a bathroom review ? No , it's not

26:36

my thing . You

26:38

didn't see anybody else , just that one

26:41

, one part where you saw those people .

26:42

Yeah , that was the only people we saw .

26:44

that we know how Winston liked the beach

26:46

.

26:46

He was , it was , he liked it . But

26:49

we went seven in the morning on that

26:51

the one morning which

26:53

there's no lifeguards , so it's like

26:55

kind of like there's no rules on the beach . But

26:57

there were some people out so there's a

26:59

. They were setting up like chairs

27:02

and tents and shit so you can pay I

27:04

think it's like 60 or 70 bucks and

27:07

you can the service . They go to

27:09

the beach at seven AM , they set

27:11

up chairs and like canopies and

27:13

tents for you to like claim

27:15

your spot on the beach and then it's

27:17

just all set up for you and you go and sit

27:19

there and then at seven at night they come back

27:21

and like break it all down .

27:23

I hate that ?

27:24

Yeah Right , just get your ass up and go if you want

27:26

, like there's people . Now you can

27:28

just like pay to claim your spot . It's kind of bullshit

27:30

, but there's some people doing that . There

27:33

were some people out running , a couple of people walking

27:35

dog . There was just enough people that

27:38

I didn't want

27:40

to unclip . Winston and let him go , because

27:43

you don't know

27:45

how people are , and like he will run up and

27:47

be like hey , who are you ? You're my friend . Like let's go

27:49

.

27:51

Yes , your dog , get your dog . He's attacking me Like

27:54

he . He's a , he's a lab , he's fine . Yeah , he's

27:56

totally fine .

27:58

So like he wanted to just like run around

28:00

, like and we took him in , like he got into the water a

28:02

little bit and he was afraid , like he

28:04

, he like goes up and like

28:06

it's as the

28:08

water is going out , like he's splashing through it , and

28:10

then like a new wave comes in and like just

28:12

hits him on the legs . Like wasn't very big , but

28:14

he was like huh , what the fuck ? And like had

28:17

to back up and reassess what the water was

28:19

doing Nice .

28:20

I don't know if I like these early ones , not really yeah

28:23

.

28:23

Pretty good , it's just a different take

28:25

on it . Like I mean , I did , I was just laying

28:27

in bed toes like fuck gotta

28:29

get dressed and leave , like I didn't have shit to do this morning

28:31

.

28:32

So yeah , but you like getting up early , Like . I mean well , not

28:34

like , but you , you have to You're , so

28:36

I mean well , I am a morning person .

28:38

I don't mind it , but I did , like

28:40

today was not getting up early , like I slept in

28:42

for three more hours than I normally

28:44

would so that's true . Maybe

28:46

you got up early .

28:48

I just did a week of the morning time . I was like by

28:50

like Thursday and Friday I was fine

28:53

, but man , fucking . The rest

28:55

of those days I was like , oh shit

28:57

. Like I'm very tired and

29:01

going to bed early fucking sucks . Like I love staying

29:03

at , like I'll come out and hear it . Like

29:05

I'll take her out autumn one

29:07

last time for like whenever

29:09

I'm done playing Diablo like one two o'clock

29:11

in the morning and just come out here I'm like this

29:14

is fucking nice . Like it

29:16

was a full it's almost a full moon . Like

29:18

it's bright as shit out . Nobody's

29:20

around . It's fucking awesome .

29:22

Absolutely , we're up up the mountains .

29:24

This past weekend and oh , you're

29:26

going up this weekend , right ? So

29:28

the full moon up there almost yeah .

29:30

Well , this past weekend we're at the mountains

29:32

at a like in Potter County , brits

29:34

grandparents place , which always

29:37

awesome that you get and everything

29:39

you just said Times

29:41

like 300 because

29:43

there's a million

29:45

more stars and the moon is

29:47

so much brighter . It gets , it's great

29:50

. But next weekend we're going

29:52

I'm going up to Vermont .

29:53

Okay , Going getting some

29:55

Heddy Topper .

29:57

Probably . I mean , we're going to right outside

29:59

of Stowe , which is where the alchemist is .

30:01

Really . Oh , that's cool . Make

30:03

sure you grab a case for a Gryffador .

30:05

Yeah , I mean he loves that shit . Grab a bunch of

30:07

stuff . I mean the Heddy Topper is good , they

30:09

have a better focal

30:12

banger by the same brewery is way

30:14

better .

30:15

I didn't want to drink one because it was like what

30:17

is it ? $200 a case or something ? When they go to like

30:20

, they have to wait at the fucking distributor to get

30:22

them .

30:22

Yeah , and like that's like an out of town or thing

30:24

, like they know that people travel up there

30:26

so .

30:28

I was like I don't want one of your beers

30:30

, it's going to taste gross , and I just wasted

30:32

you know , seven , eight dollars , whatever it

30:34

is .

30:35

It's a double IPA , it's good . It's just I've

30:38

I've had him a bunch

30:40

, because my brother-in-law has an

30:43

uncle that lives up there so he has like a constant

30:45

supply of it . So I'm sure for people that are like

30:47

can't ever get their hands on it , like

30:49

holy shit , heddy Topper , it's

30:51

so good . I'm like , yeah , like

30:53

I got still got a six pack from like

30:55

the last Vermont run , like it's fine .

30:58

Well , I remember , don't they have an

31:00

exchange thing so you can like get

31:03

like different beers throughout the country , like

31:05

all like . They'll send you a package of like

31:07

I don't know a case , but it'll all be like four

31:09

packs of different beers . Because I remember

31:11

my one buddy , really Jason . He this

31:14

is 10 years ago and he would

31:16

, he was , he's older , he's like a real estate agent

31:18

, he's like you know fancy and shit , but

31:20

he'd be like oh yeah , you have to get this one and that one

31:22

and we have a subscription to where .

31:25

I'm sure that type of thing exists . I don't know

31:27

about . I know my dad's

31:30

cousin . He uh

31:32

crazy into beer stuff . Like

31:34

he had one of those going but

31:36

it was just like a Facebook

31:38

network that he like started

31:41

himself of people . Like he didn't know

31:43

these people across the country , but it was just like

31:45

started this like Facebook group

31:47

. Like years before Facebook groups were

31:49

a thing was like look , I'm in the Northeast

31:51

by Philadelphia , like I'm looking for someone

31:54

out by Detroit and someone in Washington

31:57

state . So we got like all these

31:59

people together and they had like a monthly

32:01

thing where they would all go grab a case

32:03

of different beer from around them and

32:06

you would ship it to one other person in

32:08

the group .

32:08

That's pretty cool , yeah , but

32:11

I mean , the thing about it I would think of is a now

32:13

, once a beer is cold , doesn't it stay cold Like

32:16

, see , that's a do they brew , brew all

32:18

beer warm .

32:20

No , I mean , your beer is brewed at

32:22

different temperatures depending on the different type

32:24

of beer you want . But the a

32:26

beer going skunked really almost

32:28

has nothing to do with it getting hot

32:31

and cold , it's all about the

32:33

sunlight hitting it . So if it's in

32:35

the sun , that's when

32:37

the like sun oxidizes

32:40

the stuff . UV is doing stuff to

32:42

to the beer there is

32:44

, if it's just like In

32:46

your basement , not in a fridge , and then you put it

32:48

in the fridge and you have to make room so you take it out

32:50

of the free like that doesn't matter . That's not

32:52

gonna skunk beer , no okay but sitting

32:54

in the sun is what will fuck beer up .

32:57

All right , yeah , that's , that's a good idea

32:59

. That , like for beer , you

33:01

know , I'll just drink , I'll just keep drinking , yingling

33:04

in Miller light .

33:04

But if you're a really fancy

33:06

person come on , that's not , let's not lie

33:08

. You're , you hopped on the Bud Light

33:10

train . You liked what they were doing with their marketing

33:13

.

33:14

I don't give a shit if they were selling that .

33:16

If it was , I don't know , I really

33:18

like if you could if you could have got one

33:20

with the trainees face on it , would you have ?

33:22

Yeah , yeah , I fucking have definitely get

33:24

me just for putting the bar like

33:26

be hilarious , plus

33:28

, there's no hate here , bro , I

33:30

need , I need that sign so everybody knows there's no

33:32

hate here , just like the

33:34

other 20 signs in our house that say like love

33:37

and family and fucking all the goofy

33:39

signs and yeah

33:41

, I saw I pulled up .

33:43

That's all you got the .

33:45

Had to go get it this year it's bigger the summerfest

33:47

sign . Yeah , they had two Wife

33:50

to go grab it .

33:52

It's cool and summerfest supporting soul

33:54

droll and everything .

33:55

That's the only sign That'll be my yeah I know it's

33:57

still .

33:57

It's one sign too many for my time

33:59

here and it's .

34:00

You know , I do find myself throughout my life

34:03

like being a huge hypocrite at

34:05

times . But yeah , that's , that's

34:07

the only sign . Like you see , how long have I had that

34:09

a support your local police Assign

34:11

sitting next to the door like like , why

34:13

did you get this ? Like , where did you get this from ? She's

34:17

like I'm not putting it up , like I

34:19

kind of support the police .

34:20

I did when they're taxing you and fucking . You bought the

34:22

sign so you supported .

34:24

I don't know where it came from Like I have to buy

34:26

them . I think I don't know . She didn't think

34:28

you buy .

34:29

I'm pretty sure you buy them from the township . I think

34:31

the townships , all that shit going on , was like yeah

34:34

, here support us show us that

34:36

you're not putting out .

34:37

Only sign that goes out there your soul drills . That's it

34:40

. Fuck

34:42

all those other signs . That's all I got

34:44

. Keep caring us bud .

34:47

Mornings are not your strong , so is it

34:49

?

34:50

also . It's just like the stuff I

34:52

do want to talk about . It's just not morning time talk . It's like

34:55

we've got a few beers in us like , yeah , let's overthrow

34:57

the government , talk . Let's

35:00

, let's fucking go live off the grid , fuck

35:02

this shit . I still want internet and hot water , though

35:05

. Can we do that ?

35:05

I did say good , just coming from the weekend

35:08

of no like we , there's hot water , but

35:10

no internet , no TV

35:12

, nothing like no cell service .

35:14

Yeah , I need to be able to take a tubby and

35:18

this Internet

35:21

would be optimal . But

35:23

if we had like a DVD Collection

35:25

of like Sopranos and the wire , I guess we

35:27

could go up to the mountains .

35:28

I'll do it when , back when

35:30

my grandpa had a Mountain

35:33

house and it was nothing like back what it was

35:35

like in a mountain house community by

35:37

a lake , like it was Very much

35:39

like on the grid living . But

35:42

just you're saying that a collection of DVDs

35:44

. I've always been a morning

35:46

person , so we'd be up at the mountains , I'd get up

35:48

early , go downstairs and

35:50

I'd go right to the TV that was in the corner and

35:52

it was VHS at the time but

35:55

I would run through . I get through like two or three

35:57

of them morning before they would anybody would

35:59

come , and the first one you always was Like

36:02

a monster truck rally , like DVD

36:04

, and then that I would yeah

36:06

, and then that would run to . It

36:09

was just like it was like

36:11

a crash him up , like you like there

36:13

was like it was demolition derby , but

36:15

then there was also like Like

36:17

the best of NASCAR wrecks

36:19

and like just like a bunch of

36:21

like car crash stuff compilation

36:24

on a VHS . All

36:26

right and then that would roll into like one

36:28

of the . They had a shit ton of loony tunes

36:31

, vhs . I was like , and that would be the morning

36:33

, sitting a foot and a half from

36:35

the TV waiting for other people to wake up watching

36:37

.

36:38

That's funny . They still have memories because , like I remember

36:40

, like at a time , if you

36:42

missed all the cartoons in the morning , like it was done

36:44

, there's no more cartoons like as a kid , oh yeah it's

36:46

over , if you like .

36:48

The morning cartoons ended at noon

36:50

, yeah , and like usually , from like

36:52

10 , 30 to noon was

36:54

the shitty ones you didn't want to watch anyway , like you had to

36:56

get up early for cartoons .

36:58

Also , if you got up way way early , like

37:00

my dad would probably get up at like four or something

37:02

to go to work and it's like all right . There'd be like

37:04

what's the moose in the squirrel

37:07

Boowinkle yeah , rockin

37:09

, boowinkle the old like holy shit , like

37:11

what is this stuff ? This is ancient , yeah

37:13

, I .

37:14

I remember like seeing loony tunes

37:17

stuff for the first time , like old school , and

37:19

it was the same thing like Dad

37:21

was getting up early for work and I like go

37:23

downstairs . It's like he was watching

37:25

cartoons like what is this ?

37:27

stuff . He's all sit down and just watch

37:29

and it's funny , like so

37:31

you , then you had all of your regular , then you had like

37:33

the kid , kid stuff . You're like what the fuck

37:36

like ? I'm like 12

37:38

, like this stuff , stupid . And but

37:41

then I remember waking up early . They had dark

37:44

stalkers . There's this cartoon . It was based

37:46

off like a video game . Remember that video game ? There's

37:48

like a vampire chick and a werewolf

37:51

dude . It's like all these characters . It

37:53

was kind of like Street Fighter

37:55

characters , just monsters

37:57

, fucking cool ass cartoon

37:59

. But also the vampire chick was fucking smoking hot

38:02

. But

38:04

yeah , that was that was . But that was only on

38:06

like super early in the morning . I don't think they

38:08

wanted anybody watching it .

38:10

Hmm , I just found I was like just

38:13

and fucking shout

38:15

out to YouTube and Algorithm

38:17

knows like the shit

38:19

that you don't even know that you wanted to watch . But

38:22

I had nothing like this had popped up in

38:24

my algorithm before . But I'm like scrolling through

38:26

YouTube and it's like bang , four

38:28

hour block of a Tuna

38:31

me , remember to nomi from cartoon network like Saturday

38:33

nights when they play the anime stuff . Yeah

38:35

, yeah , I think I watched one of them

38:37

like that , so it was like rest of it was a

38:39

four hour block of to nomi from

38:41

like 97 that I was like holy

38:44

shit , and so I start what ? And it was like the

38:46

commercials from 97 and like

38:48

everything I was like damn . And

38:50

so I was sitting there Watching it . Britney's like what's this ? I

38:52

was to nomi and then we

38:54

just sat there and we watched the commercials

38:56

like we . I was like , oh yeah , this TV show

38:58

with the guy and the aliens and whatever , and

39:00

like , just like , skip all that certain

39:03

amount of comfort , yeah , let's

39:05

see these old commercials and brainwash

39:07

dude , it's brainwash , fucking

39:11

certain like it's a demolition man .

39:13

It's like all the radio is just playing

39:15

old commercials .

39:16

Yeah .

39:18

That's pretty awesome . What , what cartoons were there ?

39:20

Oh , it was a stupid cowboy beep-op

39:23

. That cowboy beep-op was on there . You

39:26

, you , hawker , show that's the . Not like that . Oh

39:28

, you hawker , shows like what's it about again ? It's

39:31

a like the kid that's in , like

39:33

it's a school kid , school kid that

39:36

he ends up dying . But he

39:38

wasn't supposed to die .

39:39

He's a ghost or something .

39:40

He was a , yeah , ghost detective

39:42

but like so they brought him back to life and we're like here

39:44

, you have like spirit powers or whatever

39:46

, and then he just you know what

39:48

else goes and fight .

39:49

There was that in a yasha and I never really

39:52

watched that a little bit .

39:54

Um , they're a Gundam . Whatever year

39:56

, flight Gundam 00 . Trying

40:01

to think what I like . I skipped like once we started

40:03

.

40:03

This is like you just want to see .

40:06

I was like seeing though like we're skipping a lot

40:08

of the actual cartoon .

40:09

Bring me the comfort of my childhood .

40:11

You know the Taco Bell , chihuahua

40:13

, and like all them , like old-school

40:15

commercials like that .

40:16

See you really like that . I

40:19

remember we had HBO legally

40:21

for a long time and that

40:23

had a block of like . It

40:25

was just like Not kid cartoons

40:28

, it was like spawn . Like once I saw spawn

40:30

the cartoon , I was like , holy shit

40:32

, this is way cooler than anything else . And

40:34

then they'd have like a block of like cartoonish

40:37

animation , like adult stuff . I

40:39

was like , oh , this is way fucking cooler

40:41

than other stuff . That was my block

40:43

, not that stupid fucking Anime

40:46

, yeah , which I guess if you watch old spawns

40:48

it's all .

40:50

It's borderline .

40:50

It's borderline , you know they just

40:53

don't have a bunch of dudes that look like chicks . Yeah

40:56

, that's your thing .

40:57

Yeah , I like it . Wayne , what do ?

40:59

you want Nothing , man , you're perfect for this

41:01

world .

41:03

The world's come to you , dude , fucking right , it's

41:05

like In

41:07

21 Jump Street . The first one

41:09

, they both both funny . Yeah , the

41:11

second one's fucking hilarious . Yeah , can't deny

41:14

it , dude . I mean , the first one is too , but

41:16

when what ? Jonah Hill and Channing

41:18

Tatum first go back to high school in the

41:20

first one and Jonah

41:23

Hills look around like fucking comics are cool

41:25

, recycling is in , like he's like I would have been

41:27

fucking the coolest kid ever if I was just born

41:29

12 years later . That's

41:32

how I feel about some things . Like man , like fucking

41:34

. Yeah , that shit wasn't cool , and

41:36

now everyone's like oh , that is cool .

41:39

Everybody's nice to you . They fucking support

41:41

you . It's fucking weird . It's a weird , weird

41:43

world . Nah , dude it's , that's .

41:44

That's not the real life . Like kids in

41:46

high school , we're still fucking . They're

41:49

still little fucks for sure .

41:51

Guess that'll never change . Oh no

41:53

, that's

41:56

my favorite scenes when he's like sitting

41:58

there with ice-cream . He's like oh man

42:00

, like he's , he banged this girl . Oh

42:03

, you banged it . Oh

42:05

, that's my favorite

42:07

, that and my name's , my name's , my

42:09

name is Jeff . That's

42:12

those are two good movies . They did that shit right

42:14

.

42:14

Oh , that's the shit that stopped Kanye from being racist

42:16

. He's like

42:18

yeah , I watched a 21

42:20

Jump Street and Jonah Hill is really funny , so

42:22

I was like you know , these Jews are all right

42:24

.

42:25

Nice bridging gaps , dude .

42:29

All right , I got one . Good because it

42:33

was . You know , I did it today

42:35

and I do it . I end up doing it a lot . But

42:37

when you wake up in the morning and

42:39

you have an alarm set because you need to get up at a certain

42:42

time and I Will

42:44

it's it'll vary from like 20

42:46

minutes to like five minutes before

42:48

my alarm . I wake up before my alarm

42:51

, like almost every day , but

42:53

I wake up , check the time , like oh shit

42:55

, I got seven minutes and like

42:57

lay down and just like you

42:59

, keep your eyes closed , dude , it's that

43:02

seven minutes might as well be five hours

43:04

, like time does not exist .

43:05

Not only that you like wake up but

43:08

don't open your eyes , like no time

43:10

has passed in that that amount , of that

43:12

span not only that , like in the

43:14

last two minutes of that

43:16

is when you're like boom , you're

43:18

going to the deepest sleep you had all man

43:20

, this is gonna be awesome . And it's like yeah

43:23

, like oh , fuck , alright , yeah , I

43:25

was way more awake five minutes ago or

43:27

five hours ago , because there's

43:30

no time . Then I am right now . How did

43:32

that fucking happen ? I think it's your

43:34

mind like fucks with you . It's like , oh

43:36

, yeah , like we know you're gonna have to get up in two minutes

43:38

, like let's , let's get you real

43:40

nice and tired .

43:42

They . It's just like you could wake up and if

43:44

you don't open your eyes , you know

43:47

it's still .

43:48

It's just that same , or you open up every

43:50

what you think is five minute or ten minutes

43:52

and you're like , alright , it's like one minute

43:55

, like , yeah , alright , like I , because I'm ready

43:57

to go , like I know I've got to get up soon . I'm just

43:59

it's at that point where you're like I

44:01

don't have to get up right now , I could take it to the

44:03

limit , and you just keep opening your eyes Hi

44:05

, another five minutes , okay , cool . Yeah , I know exactly

44:07

what you're talking . I did that just just now . No

44:12

, the worst is , what

44:14

do you like about , do you like ?

44:16

I almost like Waking up

44:18

looking at the my time gone

44:20

. Oh , I got five more minutes . Like

44:22

I like that , instead of waking up looking at the time

44:24

. It's like it's done three hours , no like if you

44:26

know longer if I got an alarm set for six

44:29

and I wake up at three in the morning and look and it's

44:31

three hours and you're like , all right

44:33

, go back to sleep , but wake up and

44:35

it's five minutes , five of six , oh fuck

44:37

. Yeah , I got five minutes , like I'm going right back

44:39

.

44:39

Well , here's the question Do you like All

44:41

right ? So say , you go to sleep and you wake

44:43

straight up . So you go to sleep

44:46

at ten o'clock , you go right to fight

44:48

next thing . You know it's like meh , meh . Or

44:50

do you like all right , you get up at like three

44:53

and you take a piss

44:55

and then you go back to bed . You're like , oh man , I

44:57

still got like three hours .

44:58

This would be great , I like , I , like

45:00

the straights sleep through really , but

45:02

only cuz I that rarely happens cuz

45:04

I'm get up to pee all the

45:06

time .

45:07

Yeah , all right , I like knowing

45:09

that . Oh man , this is awesome . I got

45:11

fucking six hours left . Bitch , no

45:14

, I like .

45:14

I like the straight sleep through and just

45:16

I'm all like every night before I

45:18

go to bed it's like let me get a glass of water , and

45:20

it's like oh , look , look , look and then go to

45:22

sleep . And then it's the middle of the night , like

45:25

why am I ? I say , oh right , cuz I'm drinking

45:27

a whole glass of water before I get into bed

45:29

.

45:29

I've tried not to like . Alright , I'm not gonna

45:31

drink anything after like eight o'clock , that

45:33

way I won't have to piss . I still kind of got

45:35

a piss .

45:37

I just get thirsty yeah .

45:38

I Don't know . The worst

45:40

is the midway point , the where

45:42

it's not like oh man , I got fucking two

45:44

, three hours left . It's like one

45:47

hour or less and it's like fuck

45:49

, this sucks . Like I had to get up now . I

45:51

couldn't either just slept all the way through or gotten up earlier

45:54

.

45:54

Oh yeah , it's like if I have to get up to pee and

45:56

it's like 20 minutes before the alarm , that's or

45:58

no , like 40 , because like 20 is like .

46:00

You can do that . I've got a little bit time .

46:02

I'm just gonna lay here and if it's

46:04

for the phone or something . If it's under an hour , I'm Roll

46:07

, I'm going like I'm holding it till the alarm

46:09

.

46:09

It's yeah , and that's sleep talk , which

46:12

I could talk about all day . I there's

46:14

only two addictions I found in my life

46:16

, and beers now one of them . I keep

46:19

saying probably , and it's

46:22

, it's , it's like it's

46:24

sleeping food dude . I love , like the father-in-law

46:27

, always be like , if I don't make it over

46:29

there on a Sunday for Sunday coffee

46:31

or whatever it's like you know

46:33

you're gonna be a gonna , we're gonna regret

46:35

this . Like you , you'll be sleeping one day forever and I'm

46:37

like , oh , it's not sleep , but I

46:41

don't care what they've told you your whole life . Everybody's

46:43

not just sleeping when they die

46:45

. But I

46:48

do love . I love wasting the day

46:50

like I love I don't man

46:53

getting up on Saturday like , alright

46:55

, cuz I worked Friday night . It's

46:58

like I can , I could play it off like I don't know

47:00

, I worked last night . I got to sleep till noon today

47:02

on Saturday . And if she goes to work , even

47:04

better , because then it's like the kids not getting

47:06

up .

47:06

He's fucking playing video games all night too , see

47:09

, but that's like it's just a different schedule

47:11

. It's like , as someone that gets up early

47:13

every day , 9 am

47:15

Is a solid sleep

47:18

in for me , so I

47:20

can get up at 9 am , be like oh , I slept

47:22

in and I got a morning and stuff

47:25

to do , and then sometimes it's like alright , I want to get

47:27

some shit done . You just get up at your regular

47:29

time on a Saturday and you blow it like

47:31

so You're gonna

47:33

make fun of me for this .

47:35

I was like maybe I won't now you definitely

47:37

will back in the winter .

47:39

I , like I saw HBO Max

47:41

added Lord of the Rings to

47:43

like they're streaming , you're right and Not

47:46

just Lord of the Rings , all the directors

47:48

cuts of Lord of the Rings that you have

47:50

on DVD . Yeah , that you've also sat

47:53

there and watched for days on end , yeah yeah

47:55

, so I got , I saw

47:57

that and I was like I planned out my Saturday

47:59

and I got up , like Went

48:02

to the bathroom , like fed the dog at like

48:04

the normal time I would . So it's

48:06

like by 7 o'clock I'm sitting

48:08

down on the couch with a tea

48:10

and , you know , something

48:12

to snack on , like some breakfast type of thing

48:15

. You need to get that .

48:18

What's up ? Do you have a baby ? Yeah

48:22

, so what is it ? Oh

48:25

shit , trace girls . Ah

48:28

, congratulations . Good

48:30

job , valerie . Alright

48:35

, alright , that's cool . Three

48:38

girls sucks for you .

48:40

You rather have keep it all one . At that point , I

48:42

think .

48:43

I guess Now

48:45

at least one of us has continued to breed , I guess

48:47

.

48:50

Sorry , no , it's all good . So I get up Seven

48:53

o'clock , I'm sitting on the couch with tea and

48:55

you know something to eat , and I

48:58

start watching Lord of the Rings

49:00

. Start Fellowship of the Ring , extended edition

49:03

four and a half hours .

49:04

Oh , so this is a Saturday . Yeah

49:07

where's Brett work ?

49:08

No , she was just asleep . She

49:10

sleeps in , she sleeps late . Like getting

49:13

her out of bed on a day she doesn't have to get up

49:15

for anything is like a hassle .

49:17

So you're just like alright , like

49:19

I know that is so strange .

49:21

I just like I got up and I knew

49:23

I had the whole first

49:25

movie of fellowship before

49:28

she gets up .

49:28

Bothers you before she's getting up .

49:30

Yeah , so she gets up , she

49:33

comes downstairs , she's like oh , she's like fucking

49:35

nerd . But she's just like oh

49:37

, lord of the Rings . I was like , yeah , she's like , obviously

49:40

, at the end of like whatever , I'm like , yep , you guys

49:42

are perfect for each other . So she's

49:44

like , okay , like this is

49:46

what you're doing . I was like , yeah , it's like watching that she doesn't

49:48

realize that it's the director's cut , so she doesn't know

49:50

that . It's like an extra hour and a half I've been watching

49:53

, but watch that . And then I was like

49:55

, oh , you want some breakfast or whatever . And she's like sure

49:57

, so I make up some eggs and bacon .

49:59

You let it play or you pause .

50:00

No , no , the movie . The first movie is over .

50:02

Okay , okay , and now .

50:04

I was like I'll make you some breakfast , do a little break

50:06

, and then . So I do that and

50:08

then I go back to sit down . She's like what are you doing ? I was

50:10

like I'm watching Lord of the Rings two towers

50:13

and she goes . Really I

50:15

was like yeah , and she's like

50:17

, well , I was gonna .

50:18

I was like go do that stuff .

50:20

Hey , I'm not telling you you , can't you gotta sit

50:22

here ?

50:22

and watch any of your plans that you've already made

50:24

. That exclude me . You don't

50:26

need to tell me about she was like well .

50:28

I wanted you to do and I was like , yeah , yeah

50:30

, fine , but I'm

50:33

doing this like this is my dad , here's

50:35

my path .

50:35

It's like that scene in Donnie Darko with that bubble

50:37

that comes out . It's like here's mine , right here

50:39

in front of the TV just hovering .

50:42

I was like yeah , I am do

50:44

like I am Lord of the Rings

50:46

in this weekend , like so

50:48

. She was like all right , fine , and then so

50:51

I watched that .

50:51

I could be at the bar .

50:53

And then Sunday morning I get up

50:55

and I watched the return of the king and it

50:57

was just great , like knowing that I had the

50:59

time to enjoy it alone

51:01

before she woke up . It's like this is so perfect

51:04

.

51:04

I love it . I do need to get up because

51:06

I am always like man , there's so much TV

51:08

or video games or drinking that I could be doing

51:11

right now and instead I'm just like

51:13

laying in bed , like , but it does make me happy

51:15

. So I'm it's , I'm torn on . It's , like I could

51:17

be up doing stuff or it could just

51:19

be laying here like an invalid .

51:21

And I'm like at the point where too

51:24

much sleep hurts my back .

51:26

It's true it does . There's a constant

51:28

, All right balancing act of like

51:31

. How much do I want my like

51:33

? Do I want to not feel good from

51:35

laying around all day ? It's like those

51:37

. There's people the wife watches . There's 600 pound

51:39

people . It's like man I I

51:41

could see how that could happen . You know , you could

51:43

fall right into it one day . Just all of a sudden

51:46

you're 600 pounds . You can't lift your leg up .

51:48

Oh man , if I could find me like , if

51:50

it wasn't Brittany , I definitely probably

51:53

would have ended up with one of them . Feeders

51:56

stuff my face .

52:01

You'll turn her into a feeder . I

52:03

just came just push play so I could watch Lord of

52:05

the Rings or get me jalapeno

52:07

poppers . Neighbor just

52:10

made me jalapeno poppers with bacon on pretty good

52:12

like homemade . Oh fuck it . Where from the garden

52:14

. I did this one of the two of those

52:16

pepper plants fucking this fucking big

52:19

dude .

52:19

I got , I guess I got bigger than my cock

52:21

, bigger than my . I

52:24

mean , everything is you know , but

52:27

I still got that baggy a jalapeno . That's a good idea

52:29

. I might smoke up some poppers that you know , sometime

52:32

this week then they were tasty and bacon yeah

52:34

, can't go wrong with that .

52:35

She used to think cream cheese and I was like I

52:38

was thinking more . She was gonna fry up

52:41

some poppers with the cheddar in the middle .

52:44

But you know I like the cream cheese .

52:46

There . I mean they're good , they're tasty , but um

52:48

, you know , can't complain

52:50

, free , free , you know , trade for

52:53

trade . Here's some peppers . Gives

52:55

me back jalapeno poppers with bacon .

52:56

So pretty good trade . Oh

52:58

yeah , that's some . Usually I

53:00

try to like I would . I gave you some of that that

53:02

pepper powder shit last year . Yeah

53:05

, and anytime I try . If somebody gives you something

53:08

, whether it's well , it's a nice saying like

53:10

we some some peppers , or somebody

53:12

gives you , you know , meat or whatever

53:14

. It's like you know I made this up .

53:15

She had a say when we gave her something one

53:17

time she was like and then she gave us something back

53:19

in the container , say , whenever you get a container you

53:22

give them back full , like I was like , oh , that's pretty

53:24

good concept .

53:25

Yeah , you don't give back an empty Tupperware

53:28

it's .

53:29

You're lucky to have good neighbors because it

53:31

can easily go south . But

53:34

yeah , I lucked out they're older . Miss the parting

53:36

, but Probably

53:38

better , probably better , for sure

53:40

.

53:42

Plus that you don't want neighbors that party , you want neighbors

53:44

, that you know I want neighbors that party

53:46

with me .

53:48

Like let's get all right now , that's

53:50

what I could wake up for . It's like all right , it's

53:52

Saturday . Like let's get up at 10 o'clock

53:54

and start drinking like I'm oh yeah

53:57

yeah , I'll get out of bed for that .

53:58

You can't drink all day unless you start in the morning

54:00

.

54:01

Yeah , but I mean , then there'd be a nice break

54:03

. We freaking break out the barbecues .

54:05

I see I'm gonna day drink anymore

54:07

. I just got like day drinking is

54:09

just me being . You know pass

54:11

out shit-face , you know peeing

54:13

on the laundry drug because

54:16

there is no break .

54:16

That's me every drinking .

54:19

But if if I'm gonna day drink

54:21

, it's like if I stop . The headache

54:24

is rolling around right at seven o'clock , so

54:26

it's like I gotta just power through

54:28

with more alcohol .

54:30

Yeah , you're right on that , but that he does come

54:32

through hard .

54:33

It's like you're getting hung over at

54:35

you know Dinner time . I'm like

54:37

mmm .

54:38

I can't so , like the break I like the midday

54:40

break of like all right foods coming and it's like

54:42

you you eat enough food where like Alright

54:45

, cool Evens you out and then

54:47

you have more time because of that , you know

54:49

. Then you start you keep drinking , but you're slowing down

54:51

, you know , because you're full and then you

54:53

, you hit that second thing so

54:55

and that's

54:58

drunk talk .

55:01

Really cutting that one short . I know you got a lot more

55:03

to go .

55:04

That's just man , yeah

55:07

, you're Watching . Watching

55:09

the movies is like I don't think I could do

55:11

any where I'm just like , alright , I'm gonna give up sleeping

55:14

in today to go do X

55:16

. Like I should do more stuff .

55:18

You could . You just need the fucking actual hobbies

55:20

that .

55:21

I got my fishing license but there's nothing

55:23

around here to go fishing in like the lake

55:25

. The fucking rivers are dead

55:28

. There's like Bluegill

55:30

and I'm fucking Sunnies and

55:32

there's no ponds or lakes around here unless you go up

55:34

the green Green Lane .

55:36

Lane or whatever . Yeah , that's an alright one . You

55:38

just head up , go a little further

55:40

head up , knock a mix in and just that's where

55:42

you can get got a shit ton of stuff in there .

55:44

Yeah , it's just like a hat . I'll just

55:46

go back to Chambers Lake , back my way , or whatever

55:48

, or Marsh Creek .

55:50

But yeah , yeah , I just up the mountains hit a

55:52

got couple , a couple brown trout

55:54

out of the crib .

55:56

I got a ton of kids like we were , we were gonna , we went

55:58

fishing the other day and it's like we pull up the thing . It's

56:00

like people are swimming . You're swimming in this

56:02

, gee , I guess

56:04

. I mean it's water . It's probably cleaner than it's

56:06

ever been in the past hundred years or

56:09

50 years , whatever , but still

56:11

like I don't know that . What is it ? Susquehanna

56:14

or whatever it's called ? The right here , what

56:16

is this river called that cuts through ? I

56:19

think it's us , and then there's other

56:22

, to the creek , the perky omen creek , and I'm like I

56:24

we walked through it one time and

56:26

it's just like . It smells funky , like not

56:29

like a river , so like it just smells like

56:31

chemicals kind of , and like we

56:33

were wearing shoes and everything felt weird on skin . I was like , yeah

56:35

, probably shouldn't swim in this stuff . I

56:38

don't know , maybe they're fine or maybe there's

56:40

a bunch of there's a Simpson fish in there but

56:44

yeah , lake fishings better like

56:46

maybe real rivers with real fish in them

56:48

fun , but Lake fishings where

56:50

it's at well , that were .

56:52

Like I go in , like you can fish a creek

56:54

, but you need to know you should fish every

56:56

creek .

56:57

Anything that had a little bit of water we'd fish

56:59

in . Yeah .

57:00

But like you got to know where

57:02

you can you can't just be like oh , here's

57:04

a creek , let me throw some bait in it , it's like you

57:07

. Have you got to walk and figure out the spots

57:09

like I'm almost 10 years in to going

57:11

up To the mountain house where

57:13

I'm just like , oh , I actually you know we're like

57:15

now I can like figure out where to actually

57:17

go fishing instead of just you

57:21

speak like that at hi Bernie Park , because we grew up

57:23

on that , so it's fun .

57:24

It's just now that you're older , like it's like huh

57:26

, do I want to catch like a little freakin smaller

57:30

than my cock fish ?

57:33

Yeah , I , the one I caught . It was like

57:35

this little four inch trout that Normally

57:38

you know . If it's any type of size

57:40

, you throw it in a bucket and then we take it back

57:42

to the pond on the Lake by the

57:44

house . And this one , it's just a

57:46

small fish . I'm like no . But then I'm like looking

57:48

and this fish Swallowed

57:50

the entire hooks . Oh , fuck's

57:53

it . I'm like get the you know the pliers out

57:55

, like sorry , I'm ripping your

57:57

guts out ripping this thing out and

57:59

then I'm just like plop , like toss

58:01

it back . He's food for something else and it

58:03

just sat there . I felt bad , just like it

58:06

was belly up and like just real shiny

58:08

, like the water was kind of murky but you could still

58:10

see like and I was like man and then . But

58:12

I fished for like 15 minutes and looked down

58:15

and was gone . So it's like at least he's gonna go die

58:17

out of sight .

58:19

Yeah , oh , have you ever looked into

58:21

the hookless hooks like ?

58:23

the barbless one . Yes , sir , uh

58:26

, I've , I've seen if they work

58:28

or anything . I've never like bought

58:30

them or used them . I'm sure they like

58:33

they make them , so they work

58:35

.

58:35

I always did feel bad because , like I'd work

58:37

worm fish , like a lot like . So

58:39

it's like , alright , you throw it in there , and it's like you eventually

58:42

get it , and like you didn't oh shit , I didn't even know I

58:44

had one on there . It's like , oh Fuck

58:46

you , you big-ass bass . I'm

58:48

sorry , I'm sorry .

58:49

I let you swallow this whole worm . You

58:51

just need bigger hooks .

58:53

Yeah well , you'd always be surprised about what

58:56

a what a bass could eat . You're like holy

58:58

shit , like . I'll

59:00

be using bigger fucking Hooks

59:02

and stuff or what'll eat a bass , like I was

59:04

. I remember reeling in this one , a

59:07

huge bass at Marsh Creek and

59:09

fucking Picker balls coming up to

59:11

get them . I'm like , oh shit , that's pretty cool

59:13

, like way bigger than the bass . Yeah

59:15

, little fucking monster in there .

59:17

We don't have to go fishing sometime .

59:19

Yeah , I ran a boat at Marsh Creek . That's

59:21

pretty fun . Get two boats , take the you brought . I

59:23

don't know what you think I want someone going a little boat

59:25

or it'd be too dumb .

59:26

No , you probably would you good , we had it like . There's this

59:29

like in the pond . They put this like

59:31

float mat , so it looks like a

59:33

like a gym mat from high school that

59:35

they roll out and it floats and it's so

59:37

apparently you could take like 1500

59:41

pound like steel plate and it would

59:43

like float that . So

59:45

we've been in there swimming . They get up on the mat

59:47

and the dog comes swimming over and like hops

59:49

up on it . So nice . I'm sure you'd

59:51

figure it out .

59:52

I don't know if I could bring our big oaf . She's fucking too

59:54

dumb .

59:55

Oh , she ever swim . Now she Can't

59:59

even give her a fucking water . Dogs .

1:00:00

We got a tricker into giving her bath .

1:00:02

Take some peanut butter , smear it on . That

1:00:04

don't work , she's like fuck you guys .

1:00:07

No , even when she was a puppy , she was

1:00:09

just like you know . You try to like all right warm

1:00:11

water , like we'll do it right this time , and it's

1:00:13

just like never liked it . Like fuck

1:00:15

you guys , I'm not going in the bathroom , I

1:00:17

mean .

1:00:18

Winston's a lab . So he likes the water , but

1:00:20

in the bat , like just like

1:00:22

take a knife of peanut butter

1:00:24

and smear it on the wall and he's just like Like

1:00:28

, alright , dude where else can we smear this

1:00:30

peanut butter ?

1:00:31

Yeah ?

1:00:31

right up my ass crack .

1:00:34

What else you got , so , like , what are you doing in the next

1:00:37

couple weeks ? You've got a bunch of plans .

1:00:39

Yeah , I got so this weekend coming

1:00:42

up , we're headed up to to Vermont for

1:00:44

my cousin's bachelor party , nice

1:00:46

, and then you got nothing the

1:00:49

weekend one of those lame

1:00:51

as well .

1:00:51

You guys don't go to a bachelor bar strip

1:00:53

club , or now I ?

1:00:54

mean probably not .

1:00:56

But Drinking a bunch .

1:01:01

Lot of really good breweries up in in

1:01:03

Vermont .

1:01:04

Oh , what if it is strip club brewery ? That would

1:01:06

be cool . We're all . The strippers are actually also brewers

1:01:08

.

1:01:09

Yeah , there's an idea , jot it down .

1:01:11

Yeah , take that one .

1:01:12

Don't take it , you take it , that's .

1:01:14

I don't Sleepin

1:01:17

, dude .

1:01:17

yeah , right , laying in bed , I think all the

1:01:19

time , like if you just got up early . Think of all

1:01:21

the you know . The beer and strippers

1:01:23

you could be getting . Ah , yeah

1:01:26

, it's true . And

1:01:28

then I think in another like

1:01:30

two weeks we're headed up to Salem

1:01:33

for my nephew's first birthday , nice

1:01:35

. And then was it Labor Day weekend

1:01:37

back up the mountains for , like guys trip

1:01:40

, cool , cool .

1:01:41

I'll be laying my bed . Thinking

1:01:43

about things that I could be doing but I'm not

1:01:46

hope you guys enjoyed . This is another episode

1:01:48

of Express Lane podcast with Kevin Stan

1:01:50

. Thanks for listening .

1:01:52

I .