Episode Transcript
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0:00
Listen, I listen to dad,
0:02
I left space. It
0:04
was more about the silence than
0:06
the questions. Honestly, you've always
0:08
been in our industry. What's
0:11
the why behind that? Go a
0:13
little deeper. What's the why? My
0:16
next guest is someone that you
0:18
might not traditionally think is
0:45
the right fit for our audience,
0:47
our community here. But having spent several days
0:49
with him on the water, that's a story
0:51
for another day, I got to
0:53
learn a lot more about Paul as a human and
0:55
what he does. And I think his
0:57
experiences will allow each one of you to
0:59
reflect on your own lives and how you're
1:01
creating these experiences for your own clients. So
1:04
we're going to get into it. Paul,
1:06
for the people who don't know who you are,
1:08
can you please introduce yourself and
1:10
tell us a little bit of your
1:13
backstory? Hi, I'm Paul Hope. I'm in
1:15
Greenville, South Carolina. It turns out Ben
1:17
also lives here. I
1:19
started watching Chris probably five or six years
1:21
ago because I was a unicorn in my
1:23
industry. And his voice
1:27
and lessons resonated with me where the
1:29
people in my industry kind of graded
1:31
against what I
1:33
saw that my customers that I
1:36
served needed. And
1:38
just as he spoke the design language, I
1:40
started to take that
1:42
on my own and go, how would that apply to my
1:44
industry? And it was, I couldn't
1:46
jump in full force, as you guys know,
1:48
when you start watching, you just kind of consume
1:51
all his information. And then I had to
1:53
translate it to what I was doing
1:55
and how I was serving a specific client. And
1:57
what I've been doing for 25 years is teaching
1:59
so much. social dancing to introverts
2:01
at Clemson University. And
2:05
when they would have a wedding celebration, very
2:08
conservative doubts, and again,
2:10
serving engineers, their families
2:12
don't throw grand parties
2:14
with alcohol. So it
2:16
was kind of common like, oh, they'll, we'll cut the cake
2:18
and then everybody will take off or they'll just have
2:21
a fellowship. And I'm like, okay, so you
2:23
don't dance. That's, that's okay. But we can
2:25
still celebrate. How does your family
2:28
have fun? So as
2:30
I listened to your design ideas and your
2:32
discovery, I would almost use the same questions
2:34
to go, well, what's important to you? That's
2:37
where you should spend your money. Who's important
2:39
to you? Grandma and
2:41
grandpa, me and people have been married 63
2:44
years. How do
2:46
we celebrate that? Oh, you don't want
2:48
to throw a bouquet. Let's not throw a bouquet.
2:51
But what if we have a moment where you
2:53
hand your throwing bouquet to
2:55
grandma, to me, mom, pop, pop.
2:57
And then the next song is
3:00
me most favorite song that they slow
3:02
dance to. What would that look like?
3:04
So that is not about a shtick.
3:06
I do it a thing. It is Jennifer's
3:09
me mom, pop, pop, they're married 63
3:12
years. It is she doesn't want to
3:14
throw the bouquet. It is honoring me mom,
3:16
pop, pop without that thing
3:19
of, well, you've been married 63
3:21
years. Do you have any wedding advice? We've
3:24
seen that. That doesn't
3:26
connect. It's kind of go it's the
3:28
hallmark movie with the different characters, the
3:31
different setting, but it's still the same storyline.
3:33
Can we modify it? And then
3:35
I ran into you and you got me and kind of
3:37
chasing that rabbit trail gave me a little confidence to, to
3:40
not listen to the DJ
3:43
community and world. It's like, hey, we'll
3:45
just recreate a night book. That's
3:47
all we do. And a lot of my customers come
3:50
to me and they want to talk
3:52
about music. And I go, yes, I
3:54
can do that in two weeks. That's easy. It's
3:56
this other part of serving your family in the
3:59
way that they don't even
4:01
know they want to be served. That is the
4:03
design aspect. Okay, so there's a couple things
4:05
I want to highlight for everyone because I spent more time with
4:07
Paul and I just want to zoom out
4:09
a little bit, give everyone some context here. So,
4:12
when you spend time with somebody, you kind of have to get
4:14
to know who they are. And the
4:16
way that he might describe himself to maybe a
4:18
stranger at some point, maybe not today, but it's
4:20
like I'm a wedding DJ or MC. And
4:23
then I'm like, what? The guy that I know
4:25
online, you're just, no, wait. No, no, well, there's
4:27
a backstory to that. Well, I teach dancing. Wait,
4:29
wait. There's another thing. Why do you need to
4:31
teach dancing? Because there are all these techie engineer
4:33
types who are very socially awkward or
4:35
introverts and dancing is a way for them
4:38
to be a little bit
4:40
more personable. And they have a skill
4:42
that they can use to build relationships with. And then
4:44
this leads you down this path. And
4:47
we're now at this point in which you're
4:49
being asked by your former students for
4:51
getting married. How do you craft an
4:53
experience? And what I want our audience to
4:55
listen for is listen to how Paul
4:57
breaks out of his category, goes
5:00
against the grain of what people in his space
5:02
do. And he finds something he's able
5:04
to deliver in the way that many of you would
5:06
approach a website or a logo or brand identity. And
5:09
that's what I want you to listen for, because there's a lot that
5:11
you're going to be able to scrape and learn from the things
5:13
that he's doing. And I hope he's
5:15
going to share some of these really heartfelt stories. And
5:17
for you to be able to map this to, wait,
5:19
this is an opportunity for me to do something different.
5:22
So that's the context, everybody. Listen in for this
5:24
part. OK. Paul, here's
5:26
the question for you. You're an out of the
5:28
box thinker. You're a very charming guy. It's
5:31
part of the South. And you are a very good representative
5:33
of the South. And you've
5:35
told me stories like, OK, a traditional
5:37
wedding has certain beats and notes and
5:40
it's very templatized. And you didn't
5:42
want to do that. First, take me why you don't
5:44
want to do that. And then let's get into some
5:46
of the things that you do and then the actual
5:48
applications and the stories that you have to share. So
5:51
when I first started just helping students,
5:53
they're like, man, we like what the
5:55
events you throw for dancers. Can
5:57
you help us do this at our wedding? And I was
5:59
like, yeah. And they
6:01
would rent these amazing hotels and then
6:03
we would play swing dance music or
6:06
local variations of that Carolina Shag. And
6:10
that was what the
6:12
couple loved. And after about
6:15
an hour, the guests were like,
6:17
okay, we've had enough of that. Let's go back
6:19
to what we know as a
6:21
traditional wedding celebration. And they're like,
6:23
no, we're going to stick with our music. And I'm like,
6:25
we can, but let me try
6:28
two songs that please them. And
6:31
the crowd fills the floor and they're like, oh,
6:33
maybe you know better. So then I
6:35
started quit being a vendor and
6:37
being an expert in the area of
6:39
serving couples. And
6:42
I started to question, well, I
6:44
know you want EDM and your
6:46
group will have it. Let's
6:48
have your guys dance for 20 minutes here.
6:51
We'll give them a break, go to the bar,
6:53
and then we'll dance EDM later. So
6:56
sometimes years later, in fact,
6:58
a friend of mine, his name is Paul. He
7:00
came back a couple years later. Now I get what you were trying
7:02
to do. Yeah, you spent
7:05
60 grand down in Charleston on
7:08
the Bay throwing this amazing wedding.
7:11
And I wanted to keep people there. So
7:14
my guarantee used to be again, learn from you.
7:17
If 80% of the people aren't there at the end, I haven't
7:19
done my job. Maybe I
7:21
owe you money out of the talent fee. Let's
7:24
talk about that. Who's going to guarantee you the guest day
7:27
to the end? Nobody.
7:29
And they lean in and listen to that. And
7:33
I would have family members come up and
7:35
go, well, how do you know this couple?
7:38
Oh, they're my students at Clemson, man, this is a
7:40
great wedding. Oh, really? What's different about
7:42
it? I don't know. It's
7:44
just different. That
7:47
doesn't help me. And I'm on
7:49
the job in the job. I can't explore that
7:51
deeper. So I started shadowing
7:53
other details. And I
7:55
actually worked for a multi op, which means they have 20
7:57
DJs. in
8:00
Charleston. So I would go down for
8:02
three years, work in the busy
8:04
season, and we would just
8:06
split the fee. And I
8:08
call it a fill in the blank wedding. If
8:10
the couple would get an online planner, choose
8:13
their song, everything was kind of
8:15
set in the order. And they
8:18
just filled in the blank, not knowing if it
8:20
was a better or worse answer. My
8:23
job when I worked for them was to call
8:26
the bride, not even the couple on
8:28
Wednesday. Hi, I'm
8:30
Paul, I'll be your DJ. Do
8:32
you have any questions? No,
8:34
I've never thrown a party like this. I
8:36
don't know what questions to ask. No,
8:39
it's fine. We'll see you Saturday. Okay.
8:42
I'd show up, introduce them into the room,
8:44
and then
8:47
walk over to the table and introduce myself. I'm
8:49
here to represent your family on the microphone, but
8:52
I'm working solo. So I got to stand behind
8:54
that stand where I'm not commanding presence. I'm not
8:56
building a rapport in the room. And
8:59
this is Charleston. This is a top
9:01
wedding destination. And what I
9:03
saw was their process
9:05
and brides like a factor. I
9:08
do more romantic, sentimental,
9:11
vulnerable heartfelt perceptions up in
9:13
Greenville, South Carolina. That's
9:16
marketing, that's perception. That's not reality.
9:19
And then I started to understand, oh,
9:23
that's my difference.
9:26
They DJs love
9:28
music. I
9:30
love my students. I love my couples.
9:33
So I serve them and their families, where
9:36
DJs are all about. And couples come to me, what
9:38
are we going to do with music? And I'm like, yes,
9:41
let's talk about that. But
9:44
what about this other conversation? Are your
9:46
parents more important? Are your Riemann people
9:48
more important? So I started
9:51
exploring that idea. And you had a language
9:53
that I connected with, listened to
9:55
Blair and just kind of the
9:58
mentors you've had on here. Again,
10:00
I've taught for 25 years and you're
10:02
an excellent teacher and meeting you in person. You
10:05
are who you are. Like that was what
10:07
most impressed me when we hung out, you
10:09
know, back in August was
10:12
you're the same person. You asked me a
10:14
billion questions. You're just a curious soul like
10:16
myself, you know, and I enjoy
10:18
that discovery session with my couples and trying
10:20
to find out who's important in the room.
10:23
I'll call dads, you know, go, Hey, what does that
10:26
father daughter dance look like? I have a daughter. And
10:29
one time when a friend was dancing
10:31
with her dad and that was an important moment.
10:34
I knew what that moment meant to her. I thought
10:36
of my daughter. She was eight and
10:39
I started to tear up. I
10:42
got to make an announcement right. I got to transition
10:44
that get it together. You can't
10:46
be vulnerable in this moment. And
10:49
then I started thinking, who's going to serve me
10:51
and my daughter when we get there? And
10:54
again, eight, that's a long way away. Or
10:57
she's 16 now. So
10:59
I wanted to do more meaningful
11:01
questions and more meaningful discovery and
11:03
serving the clients. And
11:05
I asked Tyler, she and I'm skipping around
11:07
brides that I said I know, you know,
11:09
because I know that I don't just all
11:11
stick together. Tyler's my
11:13
dad doesn't want to dance. He
11:15
knows my dancer friends are going to be there. He's going to be embarrassed.
11:19
Okay, what do you do with your dad? Oh
11:21
my gosh, we go hunting. We go hiking,
11:24
fishing. We ride motorcycles. Okay.
11:28
So I sit on that. I wait
11:30
till the end of the meeting. And I
11:32
go if we were to create some ideas, my couples
11:34
are required to come up with three ideas that
11:37
nobody's ever seen in the wedding. And I have no idea
11:39
what those are until
11:42
we create them together. And
11:45
I said, Tyler, just in Tyler's mom was sitting at
11:48
my dining room table and we were discussing ideas,
11:50
we're just brainstorming. And I said,
11:52
you know, we're, you're getting married at that, that red
11:54
bar now in Greer. Having
11:56
the ceremony outside. What
11:58
if your dad walks back? back. We
12:01
pulled the barn door closed to represent
12:04
you with the opening. But
12:06
you guys jumped on his Harley and
12:09
drove out of the barn to the
12:11
back of the ceremony. It's on dirt,
12:13
so we put a piece of wood down. He could put
12:15
the kickstand on it. It would be safe. It wouldn't fall
12:17
over the dirt. And her
12:19
eyes lit up and mom was like, oh no,
12:21
no, no, no, no. And I'm like, just
12:24
brainstorm, just talking ideas. I'll
12:27
tell you, when that motorcycle
12:29
started, the
12:31
crowd went nuts. They're like, yep,
12:33
that's him. That's dad. When
12:36
he walks Tyler down the aisle, I've
12:38
not seen a more proud father walk
12:41
a daughter down the aisle. As
12:44
soon as he shut off the motorcycle, the crowd
12:46
cheers. I fist bumped my buddy
12:48
Greg, who's my sound man DJ, sound
12:51
tech. And I'm like, we just started
12:53
the party. That's it. That made it not
12:56
a corporate organized, efficient
12:58
event. That vulnerability,
13:00
learning about dad and his situation
13:03
made it their family event. And
13:05
then when when I went to dance with his daughter,
13:07
he's like, I know
13:10
I only have to do this for 60 seconds. But
13:12
he was still glowing in that moment of walking her down
13:15
the aisle. He wasn't thinking about all the dancers in the
13:17
room. And I'm like, dude, a
13:19
parent dance has nothing to do with dancing. I'm
13:21
a dance teacher. It's about
13:23
a child honoring their
13:25
parents for three minutes. If
13:28
you play catch with your dad, dance
13:30
with them for 30 seconds to get that Father's
13:33
Day picture for Facebook or your profile. But
13:35
then you'll grab a football and just play
13:37
catch with a football like do your thing.
13:41
And then afterwards, the MC can
13:43
go, this is why they did that. But you know what
13:45
half the room is going to know that relationship.
13:48
It's the other family that you have to bring
13:50
along and go, what we didn't tell
13:53
you was that's how they spend time
13:55
together. And that's why this was so meaningful.
13:57
So it can never be a stick that they've seen
13:59
it as another wedding. And if it is, we
14:02
go, how do we make it yours? Because I don't want
14:04
to do that. So I'm listening
14:06
to the story. And you haven't, I
14:08
don't remember you sharing that one before.
14:10
But I think, again, I
14:12
don't want our listeners to be disoriented
14:14
here. So Paul does a lot of
14:17
different things. One of the things he started to grow
14:19
from on the side is just out
14:21
of listening to the request for what he could do.
14:23
So he's teaching dancing at the university.
14:25
And then they're like, Hey, can you help us with
14:28
our wedding and the business grows. And then I think
14:30
we all go through this arc where we kind of see like,
14:32
what are the established big boys
14:35
players doing? And we see what they're
14:37
doing. We're like, there's got
14:39
to be a better way. And
14:41
they they're like a factory DJ where
14:43
you just go in and there's not
14:45
a high touch feeling. And that's
14:48
the way the market is. And then you say, I don't
14:50
want to do that. I want to do something more innovative. And
14:53
you're kind of, I guess the
14:55
term that you use, and if I call
14:57
correctly, was you're an entertainment
14:59
designer. Is that the term you use?
15:01
Yes. And I thought
15:03
at first, you know, full disclosure, when you first
15:05
told me that I'm like, Oh, here's another guy
15:08
with a high flute and title, like, you're not
15:10
a trash man, you're a sanitation engineer. You know,
15:12
it's like, you don't work in fast food,
15:15
you work in express dining. It's like, what? Come
15:17
on. Let's just be real
15:19
here. But actually, what Paul walked
15:21
me through his the way he thinks and
15:23
operates, I found a lot of connections and
15:25
parallels to how you may want
15:27
to have the conversation with your client. So it's
15:29
kind of weird. It's like art and life imitating
15:31
one another. So I'm out there teaching designers
15:34
how to have a different kind of conversation with
15:36
their clients. Paul applies this
15:38
in a different industry. And I'm like, that's
15:40
pretty cool. Let's take Paul's experience as a
15:42
person who works in weddings, as an entertainment
15:44
designer, let's bring that back to the world
15:47
of design again. So we're bouncing
15:49
back and forth and pulling. So as
15:51
an entertainment designer, you're
15:54
actually running what I would consider like
15:56
innovation workshops. Yeah, you're
15:58
edict of like, we must come up with three
16:01
ideas that you've never seen anyone
16:03
do before, who can never claim. And
16:05
so you free them from the dogma
16:07
or the traditions of this is how a waiting is
16:10
supposed to be structured and an act forward is going
16:12
to be like this, an act six and the cake
16:14
is cut and everybody goes home. And
16:16
you're like, let's break it open. And you give them
16:18
permission to celebrate and honor the people that matter the
16:20
most. So you started with a
16:22
lighthearted story. I'm
16:24
curious before we get into more of the strategies and
16:26
the things you've actually done is
16:29
do people come to you with the
16:31
expectation that this is Paul and you're
16:33
not going to get a traditional, you're
16:35
not going to have a templatized conversation. Do they
16:37
already know this going in or there's still a
16:40
little bit of like, let me try
16:42
to bring you to my world. Everybody
16:44
that's come to me is off balance. If
16:46
they've been to a wedding, they get
16:48
that I do something different, but
16:50
they're not quite sure what I do. When
16:54
you're in the room, you get it, but just
16:56
to explain it to like today, you
16:59
don't know until you feel it. And the stories I
17:01
told you had to do with a
17:03
father-son relationship or a grandpa relationship
17:05
because I thought you would connect
17:07
to that. The father-daughter
17:09
relationship may not connect as well.
17:13
So when they come in, I go
17:16
now, I'm going to be
17:18
three times more than any other DJ you talk to. And
17:21
I'm not here to sell you equipment packages. They
17:25
are going to sell you level one equipment, level
17:27
two equipment, level three equipment. And I don't even
17:30
know if you're going to meet the talent that
17:32
is going to be on the microphone representing
17:35
your family. I
17:38
had a girl two weeks ago said,
17:40
yeah, my brother's wedding last
17:42
August, they hired a
17:44
budget guy and he was
17:47
a self-professed comedian. So
17:49
he would tell all these jokes and the timing
17:52
and the rhythm was off, but he was always
17:54
on the mic trying to build
17:56
his standup career. And
17:58
we're like, please shut up. It's too late.
18:00
That is in the room that created that defensive
18:04
thing. And it's like, oh, he didn't
18:06
get audio or video of that person representing
18:09
your family on the microphone. I
18:11
showed my Sarah's wedding was a thorn blade. It's a
18:13
really nice country club. And I screwed up somebody's name.
18:16
And I went, hold on. Let me do that again. And
18:19
I was like, this is how I would will throw
18:21
up. But saving that is where we
18:23
become the hero. And here's one time when my best
18:25
friend Sarah, I would never screw that up in my
18:27
life. I scrolled up on my
18:30
iPad on my teleprompter and read the
18:32
wrong name. And everybody cheered and she went,
18:35
not me. And I'm like, I'll fix
18:37
it. Stand right here. I was like, I
18:39
screwed up. I'm going to take it up. And
18:42
being a teacher and failing in front of students, you
18:44
got this. You know, this happens. Some
18:46
people are scared to death about talking
18:48
in front of public. So
18:50
I've studied character study on
18:53
Michael Buble, how he builds
18:55
rapport in between the songs
18:57
that he sings and just
18:59
went to YouTube and did a study in search.
19:01
What does he say? How does he build
19:03
rapport? What does he do? Because that's
19:05
a little bit of knowledge that I want him to
19:08
represent. You say I got that Southern
19:10
charm. I want some Michael Buble slavness
19:13
to come through. So I've studied
19:15
a little bit of what he does. So
19:17
you're an entertainment designer. So people are coming
19:19
to you off balance, which I take as
19:21
they've had a bad experience. They're wondering, like,
19:23
something's funky or we heard some good things
19:25
about you. They might have been to another
19:27
wedding that you put on and they're like, Hey,
19:30
this is a little different. We got to look up
19:32
this guy and have a conversation. So
19:34
I asked that question because I want
19:37
everyone to know it's not like they're just lining up
19:39
and there's no effort that you have to do. You
19:41
still have to bring people on because you're asking them
19:43
to have a leap of faith to
19:45
do something out of the box. And people are
19:47
very much regulated by routine.
19:50
And so here you are. You're like, Hey,
19:52
we have some rules. I'm three times more expensive,
19:54
which is a classic. Just letting
19:56
you know up front that it's going to be more. Let's
19:59
just pause. there. Let's just talk about that. When
20:01
did you adopt this strategy and what are the
20:03
kind of responses that you get? And sometimes people
20:05
don't have that kind of money. What do you
20:08
do? Well, there was an ongoing philosophy
20:11
in the industry. Just raise your price. Just
20:14
raise your price. Just do it. And I'm
20:16
like, listen to you. And you're
20:18
like, add value. And obviously
20:21
raise your price, but back
20:23
that up. I have no problem now
20:25
going on three times the price because they lean
20:27
in and listen. Whereas before it
20:30
was like, I wasn't confident that I had
20:32
the skills. I wasn't confident that I could
20:34
do this for every couple. What if I
20:36
get a rip? I went to my
20:39
buddy flew me into Chicago to help a
20:41
couple because he had an instance where he
20:43
couldn't help Haley.
20:46
And Haley's a hairdresser for the
20:48
industry. He serves
20:50
all the sexy people and you don't screw up
20:52
a vendor's wedding. And he's like, Paul,
20:54
I can't help her. And
20:56
this is two weeks before. I'm
20:58
like, I usually have nine to 12 months
21:01
with my couple. What if we need
21:03
to get somebody
21:05
in a recording studio to sing a song
21:07
to their mom? I
21:09
don't have that time with Haley. How do I serve her?
21:12
So I went through all his planning sheets, all his question,
21:14
all his discovery and Eric and I have been working together
21:17
building this idea and trying to grow a small
21:19
network of people that do this. And there's only
21:21
about 10 of us now that really take on
21:23
this entertainment design
21:26
idea and process. And
21:29
I call Haley's dad the Wednesday
21:31
before. I hear you're
21:33
flying in from South Carolina. I'm so thankful. I was
21:35
like, Eric, what's supposed to tell you that I
21:38
didn't want to make you nervous. I'm coming in
21:40
a day before affects you when I land just
21:42
so you have peace of mind that I am
21:44
in state. I'm 30 minutes away. Oh,
21:47
not a big deal. Flights are great. Eric
21:51
said, and I know I got to go there and
21:53
represent and make Eric proud. I'm
21:55
talking to dad and what is that moment going to be?
21:58
Are you guys playful? You have a choreographer? Are
22:00
you sentimental? I'm going to cry like a
22:02
baby. That's my girl. I
22:04
said, are you okay with that? Because I don't
22:07
want to extend this moment if he gets angry when
22:09
he starts crying in front of 300 guests. That
22:13
is some dad's reactions. Oh, no,
22:15
I'm going to have tissues already in my pocket. I already got
22:17
that figured out. Cool. So
22:19
I can lean into that moment with
22:21
silence and
22:24
just let them have a moment together on
22:26
the dance floor. And
22:28
it's a distillery, journeyman distillery. And
22:31
I say, just, you know, I've had
22:33
some people get a little happy at events
22:36
and want the microphone, maybe a little boisterous, a little
22:38
out of hand. Is there an
22:40
uncle or maybe a frat boy like that
22:42
that I need to be aware of? No,
22:44
no, we all, you know, we have parties like this
22:46
frequently. Everybody may have fun, but they don't
22:49
get out of hand. Cool. Because if they
22:51
do, I'm bringing them to you. Oh, yeah,
22:53
no problem. No problem. Dad, is there
22:55
anything else that I should maybe be aware
22:57
of? Any questions I'm not asking you have
22:59
concerns about the wedding ceremony? And
23:01
there was the longest strangest pause. And
23:04
he said, well, there's, there is
23:06
a thing. Wendy is my sister.
23:09
She threw Haley's bridal
23:11
shower. Aunt
23:13
Wendy's not going to be there. Okay,
23:17
is she okay? Yes.
23:20
But on Monday, her son
23:22
passed away. And she's got
23:24
to be at his funeral and hosting that two hours
23:27
away. I said, okay, of
23:29
all the families I've ever known, your
23:32
family, one needs to celebrate what they
23:34
need permission to celebrate. They
23:36
need to know Wendy's okay with
23:39
them celebrating two hours away.
23:41
If this is heavy in the mind of one
23:43
family. And I said, let's get Wendy
23:45
there. Not in person, but in
23:47
spirit. I
23:49
don't know what you mean. And I
23:51
said, well, I'm going
23:53
to text you a voicemail, Google voicemail. Doesn't
23:56
ring on my end. Wendy's going to call in. She's
23:59
going to leave us. speech and
24:01
after the bridesmaid speech, groomsman speech,
24:05
we're going to play a little recording for her. If she
24:07
would like to, that's how she would choose to participate.
24:11
He got a little confused, so Aunt Wendy calls me
24:13
three hours later. My
24:15
brother, what does he want
24:17
me to do? And I said, here's the idea. Oh,
24:21
I love it. I am busy right now. I
24:23
will leave you recording tonight. I said, I
24:25
just need it two hours before the ceremony.
24:29
So whenever, at your leisure, and
24:32
call as much as you want. I'll look
24:34
at the last recording first, because if you want
24:36
to do two or three takes, and it sets
24:38
in motion. This is
24:40
Wednesday. Wendy called
24:42
me on, I think, Friday. I
24:45
shadow Eric at another wedding
24:48
in the area just to get the local norms
24:51
and customs. So I don't be too,
24:53
I'm not too Southern in
24:55
the outskirts, you know, of Indiana. See
24:58
a voicemail pop up. I
25:00
said, Wendy did it. Like,
25:02
she just left one voicemail. So
25:06
we get done with that wedding, we go back to his place,
25:08
we sip it on suburban in the living room. I'm
25:10
like, hey, let's, let's hear what Aunt Wendy did. Aunt
25:13
Wendy knocked it out of the park. And I know you've heard the
25:15
audio. It's phenomenal. And
25:18
I was like, this is going to start, this is it.
25:20
This is the vulnerable moment that's going to start the party
25:22
and give permission. So the next day
25:24
we're in the room. He
25:26
knows, dad knows it. That's
25:28
it. Because I want
25:30
genuine emotion and surprise. I
25:33
tell the photographer and videographer, there's a
25:36
third speech that is not on the planner. They're
25:40
not in the room. So what I need you
25:42
to do is go at 45 degree angles and
25:44
get on Haley, take pictures, take video for reaction
25:47
is going to be one that somebody
25:49
needs to see and Haley will want for the rest
25:51
of her life. So I get the
25:54
video and the photographer set up. I
25:56
talked to my down tag. And
25:59
I said. I'm gonna introduce the
26:01
third person. I think we have somebody else that's gonna give a
26:03
speech. Where are they? They're somewhere in the
26:06
room. Can you point them out? I'll take the mic over to
26:08
them. And then I just found
26:10
my head because the focus is still on me. And
26:12
I said, give me a three count and
26:15
then hit play. And
26:17
within five seconds, Haley was
26:19
in tears. All the bridesmaids had gathered around
26:21
her. In 30 seconds,
26:24
Wendy gave that room permission
26:27
to celebrate that day. And
26:29
I left a long pause after she spoke
26:32
because there's nothing you can say to follow that up. Tonight
26:37
we celebrate in Wendy's arms.
26:40
We're gonna open the dance floor with a slow dance. And
26:42
I'm gonna ask you to grab a sweetheart, a loved one,
26:45
somebody at your table. Just put your arm
26:47
around them and come out here and let's all
26:49
start the night with a slow dance. And
26:52
I showed you a picture of 10, eight,
26:55
10 people, whole table, just
26:57
arms around each other, swaying back and
26:59
forth, eyes closed. It
27:02
felt amazing. Of the 300
27:04
people, probably 280 got up and started dancing. I
27:10
took a quick picture of what I said to you. I
27:13
texted aunt Wendy and
27:16
said, tonight we open the floor in your
27:18
honor. You did this. I know
27:20
you're not here, but you're here in
27:22
spirit. That felt amazing,
27:24
giving that gift to that family. I
27:27
walked over to a DJ of 35 years.
27:32
He said, I didn't
27:35
understand why Eric had to fly you in. Now
27:38
I get it. I've never seen that. I
27:41
could beat on this bourbon barrel and these people are
27:43
ready to party. It doesn't matter what I play right
27:45
now, they're gonna celebrate. That
27:49
was amazing. I've done this 35 years. And
27:52
I said, to be honest with you, I've only been doing it
27:54
five years and I've never done that. That
27:57
was dad's gift, a moment
27:59
of vulnerability. honesty and
28:01
you take the tools that you know
28:03
and craft something for
28:05
them, you facilitate it. Again,
28:08
it wasn't about me. It's
28:11
not about me having a spotlight. It's where do you
28:13
shine it? All the important people in the room. You're
28:16
serving the bride whose
28:19
best friend throws the bridal shower. And
28:22
that's become one of my favorite
28:24
stories to share because so many elements
28:27
of design came in. Wednesday
28:29
to Saturday, there was no time. There's a
28:31
constraint on that. And
28:33
I've heard you say, man, give me some
28:35
constraints. That's what makes it even better. Limit
28:38
my abilities. I have to be more creative. And
28:41
there were absolutely three other things that we did
28:43
that night. But I think for that
28:45
family in that moment, that's the highest way I've
28:47
concerned them. I want to ask
28:49
you this question, Paul. It's beautiful stories,
28:51
very touching. What are the lessons
28:53
that take away moments for you reflecting back on
28:56
that? How do you draw the
28:58
lessons from that story? What would you do?
29:00
How would you advise other people if they
29:02
want to create a memorable experience? Listen,
29:04
I listened to dad. I left
29:07
space. It was more
29:09
about the silence than the questions.
29:11
Honestly, you've always been in our
29:14
industry. What's the why behind
29:16
that? Go a little deeper. What's
29:18
the why? And a lot of the times I
29:20
start with the group. What's the most important
29:22
thing to you? Because this voice has not
29:24
been heard. And when somebody
29:26
makes them sit in silence and go, I just
29:29
want my friends to dance. Oh, do you dance?
29:32
No. Okay, so if your friends are
29:34
going to do that, what else are we
29:36
going to do? Your friends are important to you. Oh,
29:41
you spent your summers together. You guys roast each
29:43
other. I can use that. Okay,
29:45
let's move on. And then later on, I
29:47
go, when we introduce them,
29:50
since you have that relationship, what if we roast the
29:52
crap out of them? And we make fun of them
29:55
as they enter the room. We'll
29:57
bring you in first so you get
29:59
to watch. them. And
30:01
we'll do it in reverse of what is normal. So you get
30:03
to see them on the hot seat and
30:06
they're like, oh crap, I'm next. So
30:08
asking questions of discovery, silence
30:12
and listening. And
30:15
then I've had a lot
30:17
of tools at my disposal because of 25
30:19
years. My
30:21
buddy Greg used to travel with Princess
30:23
Cruise Lines. He's the stage production manager.
30:26
He's promoted now. He's beyond that. At
30:28
the Georgia Aquarium. They spend
30:30
millions of dollars in production. He's trained with Cirque
30:32
du Soleil. He's trained with Disney. So if they
30:34
go, we want it to snow during our first
30:37
dance. I'm like, you know, I can actually do
30:39
that. Like there's stuff you've seen in
30:41
Vegas that we can make happen. I mean, if there's
30:43
no budget. Paul wanted to fly
30:45
in on a helicopter from the Yorktown over to
30:47
the country club. And
30:49
I'm like, you know, what FAA says I can't
30:52
do it in two weeks. The country club said
30:54
the exhaust would burn their grass. We
30:56
can't put a platform there, but I did check
30:58
on it. So
31:02
you just make a couple of calls and go,
31:04
I know this is a pipe. This
31:06
is a what if this is a movie scenario, but what
31:08
if we low budget can we make it
31:10
happen? So those are the tools I've just leaned
31:13
into. And again, having constraints, not
31:15
knowing what I can do for people makes
31:18
it way more interesting. It's
31:20
not a repeatable thing. It is
31:23
a design and you need, like you said, when you
31:25
experiment, you need that latitude and that extra budget to
31:27
go. Okay,
31:29
that's idea number five. But man, it
31:32
just got better. Now it's idea number one.
31:34
It zoomed up the charts to something we
31:36
added. Some new information came in.
31:39
And it's great when they leave their wedding and go, oh, we
31:41
have so many other ideas we didn't have time for. Yeah,
31:44
what a great party that you
31:46
didn't do all the entertainment. Because
31:49
we picked the three best things to do
31:52
and everybody stays there till the end. Where dancers
31:54
are non-dancers, right? Your
31:57
parents' friends that are in
31:59
their 40s, 50s. Like how
32:01
do they celebrate? There's a couple of
32:03
things that you said I would like to contextualize
32:06
and frame for our audience in
32:08
the kind of maybe the language they're familiar with. The
32:11
first thing I heard in the story with Haley
32:14
and Aunt Wendy and the dad
32:16
was, you didn't have a lot of time,
32:18
so you have to be creative. So the constraints
32:20
are like, what can we do? We can't do big
32:22
productions. And you went through your
32:25
usual line of questions and you thought we've covered the
32:27
basis. We put the father at ease. And
32:30
then you asked the killer question is, is there something
32:32
I should have asked you that I didn't? Is there
32:34
something else you're concerned about? And
32:37
you gave a ton of time for them to figure it out. And
32:39
the clue to all of us is the body
32:41
language, the silence is actually a huge clue to
32:44
say like, there's more here. Just give
32:46
a person space. And if
32:48
you're patient, they will reveal something. And
32:50
it's heavy on his heart, but he didn't know if this was the time
32:52
or place to speak it. So a
32:54
lot of times when we're working with our clients, we're
32:57
too involved with running the show that we don't
32:59
actually take a moment to pause and say, from
33:01
their point of view, is there something else they wanted to
33:03
talk about that we didn't give them space to? And
33:07
that's where your gold came from. You
33:09
do what Brian Collins, the
33:11
well respected and the
33:13
top tier shelf kind of designer legend
33:16
that he is, in every
33:18
problem, you must find the hidden dragon. He
33:20
often references Beowulf and Grendel and Grendel's mom.
33:22
And there's always a bigger problem underneath the
33:24
problem. So when you solve one thing, there's
33:26
actually another thing and you have to get
33:28
to the heart of the matter. And
33:31
what was heavy on his heart was I
33:33
lost my nephew, right? His sister's
33:35
son passed while he's conflicted.
33:39
And he's in a world of emotions, mixed emotions. And
33:42
you did what you're supposed to do as a
33:44
service provider, which is to serve. And
33:47
I like your general philosophy on this, which is
33:49
so many of us want to run
33:51
to be the stage on the stage.
33:54
You are like happy to be the guide
33:56
on the side just to make sure you're
33:58
navigating the emotions and telling the story. giving
34:00
people permission to celebrate, because
34:02
the ones that knew were probably heavy
34:04
on their heart. It's hard to celebrate when you know
34:06
someone else is in deep grief. And
34:09
to ask Antwendy for the
34:12
generous act of celebrating this thing while
34:14
she's mourning herself, and it's such
34:16
a beautiful thing, and using all the tools of the trade,
34:19
creating the suspense, the drama, and
34:22
then releasing that into the audience, and then giving
34:24
them something to do with their emotions. I think
34:26
you do that really well, probably better than anybody
34:29
that I've spoken to. Because a lot
34:31
of people would create that moment, and everybody's feeling it. And
34:33
then you say, why don't we just do this, if you guys
34:35
can just stand up and hold each other, and
34:37
we're going to just move through this, and we're going to have a
34:40
great time. So you gave them action to take, and
34:42
I thought that was really beautiful. Did I miss anything
34:44
there, Paul? No. One of
34:47
my tools is as a teacher, and
34:49
you've been in a room with students. You
34:52
know when students are ready to learn. I
34:54
know when students are nervous, and they need
34:56
a story, a laughable moment, to
35:00
we learn better when we're happy, when we get frustrated
35:03
and confused, we don't learn.
35:06
Same thing happens at weddings. When people are frustrated
35:08
or confused, they don't have fun. When
35:11
dad shows vulnerability and speaks to
35:13
his children, that's a tone in
35:15
the room. And I'll ask
35:17
them, when your DJ reads the room, what does he do? Everybody's
35:20
dancing to 80s music, so they play more
35:22
80s. What
35:24
does he mean by read the room? Because I know
35:27
when your family's ready to celebrate, and
35:29
when we need to do the next thing. I
35:31
can tell you, if dad's going to give a
35:33
tear-jerking sentimental speech, we can't do
35:35
a playful thing after that. We
35:37
need the groomsman, who is
35:40
a comedian, we need him to
35:42
do the last speech leading into this next thing.
35:44
It's a flow. It's an emotional flow in a
35:46
vibe. I don't care about tradition.
35:49
If there's a tear-jerker, or if he's going to
35:51
create a sentimental moment, maybe we
35:54
go into the father-daughter dance after that. Or
35:56
we move things around to fit the day.
36:00
permission to mess with the timeline. I'm like, you're going to
36:02
show up at a time, you have to be out of
36:04
the time and food that you're spending a ton of money
36:06
on has about a 15 minute window that needs to be
36:08
served in. But sit back and enjoy your party.
36:11
If we need to readjust things, I'll
36:14
tell the people that need to participate.
36:16
Hey, we're going to do this thing now because that's what the
36:19
family is ready for. Have you
36:21
been to your spouse's Christmas
36:23
or Thanksgiving? How is that family weird?
36:26
How do they celebrate? What's different about
36:28
their events? Oh, you know, when I went to the
36:30
first Christmas, dad wrote Suess
36:32
poems. And he would
36:34
work on these for three months and we'd hide
36:37
clues around the room and we all would do
36:39
that. What if we do that at your wedding? What
36:41
if we share that tradition
36:43
with your family, and
36:45
then you guys adopt it going
36:47
forward? That was one of the most
36:49
fun things we've ever done. So there's
36:52
endless ideas pop up. And first,
36:54
you're kind of nervous how
36:57
to be creative. But when you you listen,
36:59
sometimes the things just they come to you.
37:02
It's been so much fun. Creating
37:04
this for people. It's time for
37:06
a quick break, but we'll be right back. Tonight
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the feature.com/pro. And
38:12
Rebecca, welcome back to our conversation. I
38:16
like the kinds of questions that you ask
38:19
to get them to think about how to honor
38:22
somebody that might have passed, somebody that's
38:24
important to them or to bridge
38:26
two families together because the groom and the
38:28
bride, they know each other well, but the
38:30
family may not, or the extended family surely
38:32
doesn't. And to bring in
38:34
cross pollinate traditions and to introduce some
38:36
of the quirkiness of one family that
38:38
makes it so memorable. And you're
38:40
giving them all this kind of
38:42
permission to like let go of
38:45
all these tropes and these
38:48
traditions, if you will, and allow them
38:50
to do something and to really create
38:52
a truly memorable experience that is
38:54
one of a kind. And when we think
38:56
about people in our service space, whether you're producing
38:59
a video, I think a video, the parallels
39:01
are very close here. You're telling
39:03
a story. Are
39:05
you going through the mechanical parts? Like we open on this
39:07
shot, we go wide, we do a
39:09
two, three camera setup, and then we're in,
39:12
we're out, we deliver the video. Or are
39:14
you trying to surface something that's meaning that's
39:16
going to resonate with the audience? In this
39:18
case, the audience is everybody, the 300 participants
39:21
in the celebration. And you're making
39:23
it special, memorable to the CEO. That could be
39:25
grandma or grandpa and the client who
39:27
buys this, the chief marketing officer, which I guess is
39:29
the bride and the groom. You're servicing
39:31
and hitting all people. And so you have
39:33
a high probability of delivering something that just
39:36
totally knocks it out of the park. Can
39:39
you tell us another instance, another story, and share something
39:41
with us so that we can learn from that as
39:43
well? Sure, I'll tell you the one that
39:45
I shared with you last August. So my
39:47
buddy Michael from fourth grade, he used to
39:49
come over just because I had a pony
39:51
and we'd ride horses together. And
39:54
I helped with his daughter's, first daughter's wedding, he's got
39:56
three daughters, four or five years ago. And
39:59
he brought me. to Missouri from South Carolina.
40:01
And I was like, every daughter's
40:03
wedding, if you have me will be different. And
40:05
you know, he just trusts me, okay, come do what you
40:08
do. I like your posts online, I think it's gonna be
40:10
great. And so
40:12
the second daughter gets married and I'm gathering
40:14
my information, I call him and I was
40:16
like, all right, who's her best buddy in
40:19
the family? Oh, it's my dad, grandpa
40:22
Sam. And he
40:24
would take lollipop lollipop, oh,
40:27
oh, and he would say Lily
40:29
Brooke. And
40:31
so in kindergarten, the teacher would
40:34
finish the class and play music
40:36
for all the students. And
40:38
one day he plays this song, and
40:41
Lily just gets crazy. They
40:43
stole my grandpa's song. And
40:47
he's like, what? What are you talking
40:49
about? Get some of his laughs. She's
40:51
sniffled. It's Lily Brooke, Lily Brooke. So
40:53
the rest of the year, they've got
40:56
to sing Lily Brooke. So
40:58
I said, Oh my God, I know
41:00
your your mom is ill. And your
41:03
dad or grandpa Sam may not make it to the
41:05
wedding. When are you gonna just
41:07
see dad? Oh, probably in two weeks. I was
41:09
like, cool. Take your phone, set it
41:11
up on the shelf, hit record, walk out of the room
41:14
and go, Dad, there's
41:16
Lily. You're at the
41:18
wedding, sing to her. I said, I don't know if we'll
41:20
use the video. I don't know if we use the audio.
41:22
Maybe he'll be there. A month
41:24
later, he sends me the video. The audio is
41:27
amazing. Sam was able to
41:29
make it. So we
41:31
didn't know if he would be or not. So
41:33
I said, here's how we're gonna play this. We're
41:35
gonna do the parent dances. And then
41:38
we're gonna go we have one more very, very
41:40
special day. And Lily, I
41:42
know somebody that means the world to you. Grandpa
41:44
Sam is asking you for the next dance. And
41:47
then we just played her
41:49
head buried in the grandpa Sam's
41:51
chest and Sam just glowed. I
41:54
didn't want him singing in that moment because I thought
41:56
he might get choked up. I didn't know, you know,
41:58
live performance how that might go. So
42:00
we played the recorded version. It
42:03
was maybe 30 seconds long. And
42:05
then I explain, I tell everybody the story, the
42:07
kindergarten story. And then
42:09
I go, Sam, what the best part, I saw it
42:11
on video and the best part was you making that
42:13
sound. How do you do that? And
42:15
he pops and then all around the room,
42:18
I'm like, they start doing this. And I'm
42:20
like, Hey, guys, you just had dinner. You really want to
42:22
put your fingers in your mouth right now. They're
42:24
like, Oh, yeah. So just that
42:26
playful observing what's going on in the room. And
42:29
I was like, what if
42:31
we play, can we play that song
42:33
again? But this time, let's
42:36
all join in now that we know the words and we'll sing
42:38
the song to her. And she
42:40
was like, heck yeah. So
42:42
we played the song, we segued
42:44
out of that into lollipop.
42:47
And that started the dance floor. I didn't even have to say
42:49
welcome everybody to the dance floor. Dance floor's open.
42:52
That started the party. I
42:54
walk over to my sound tech. The
42:57
groom follows me. He
43:00
doesn't know what we do. We didn't start
43:02
dancing. We didn't start doing DJ stuff
43:04
yet. And he
43:06
goes, now I get it.
43:09
I was like, can you tell him that he's
43:11
here shadowing me. He's never worked with me before. Yeah,
43:14
he told me he did all this stuff. And
43:16
he would make bars unique. And you just made
43:18
my wife so proud. That was
43:21
amazing. Thank you. And
43:23
then they just dance. And again, we had
43:25
other things in the room. But
43:27
that was to me, the
43:29
story that resonated. And
43:32
when grandpa Sam is gone, she
43:34
will always have that audio recording of
43:37
grandpa seeing show the video to
43:39
have wedding pictures, video from the
43:42
wedding. And
43:44
to me, if I can give a family that
43:46
gift, does it matter
43:48
what you charge? It was
43:50
worth it. And Michael's teased me that
43:52
the next daughter is getting married to Chateau and
43:54
France. So we'll see. You're going
43:57
to have to keep. one-upping
44:00
this. Oh, I love
44:02
the challenge of it, but
44:04
also I vent like you. I vent my families,
44:07
I vent my couples, and see are we a right
44:09
fit? If you're just trying
44:12
to recreate kind of a drunken nightclub scene, you
44:14
can spend way less and get into the bathroom. This
44:17
is way different. I'm asking you to let me have
44:20
control of your timeline. I'm
44:22
asking you to let me do secret
44:24
surprises maybe for you, maybe
44:26
with you, but
44:28
they will either be amazing or I
44:31
don't do them. If I have questions, then
44:34
we don't do that. It's
44:37
going to be amazing. At the end of the
44:39
day, half of the fee
44:41
you pay me is on the
44:43
line. If
44:45
you're not happy, you go, I don't owe you that money.
44:47
I said, I've never paid a dime back. It's
44:50
going to be better. I know that adrenaline is running
44:52
that day. They're going to have the best time
44:54
of their life anyway. But
44:56
when you add these things and they're better than
44:58
what you promise, it just blows their mind. The
45:02
only problem is I work with a lot of introverts
45:05
and they don't tell the story. The
45:07
word of mouth is so limited. Then how
45:09
do you tell that story? You get on a
45:12
podcast and you tell that story, Paul. That's
45:14
what you do. The question I have for you as I'm
45:16
listening to the story is when you're
45:18
talking about playing the song and then
45:20
inviting everyone to do the same thing,
45:23
is that an audible that you're calling on
45:25
the spot or you knew this is what
45:27
we're going to do and then you can
45:29
cue the DJ to then transition into the
45:31
real song? How much of this
45:33
is premeditated versus this is you thinking on
45:35
your feet? All of that was premeditated. I
45:38
knew it was a short segment. I wanted
45:40
to let them hear the original because there's younger
45:42
people in the room. I didn't know if they
45:44
knew the song. I
45:47
wanted the audience to join Grandpa
45:49
Sam to make him proud. I
45:52
wanted them to feel and participate. We
45:54
know sitting at a table during
45:57
dinner, I call it pre-group. But
46:00
I have music that makes everybody want to dance,
46:02
but it's not a danceable song. So they start
46:04
moving, they start tapping, they get fidgety there. I
46:06
build that frustration. So when I say the dance
46:09
floor is open, they're like, I don't know why,
46:11
but I have to go dance. They're
46:13
asking to clap their hands, asking to
46:15
raise. Every little bigger movement is asking
46:18
for a little bit more participation. If
46:21
you build that frustration with an audible,
46:24
now we're all singing. We don't sing
46:26
karaoke, but we're doing it to
46:28
serve grandpa Sam. We're doing it to serve
46:30
the couple. When you
46:32
sing happy birthday, everybody sings. So
46:35
I knew asking for a little more,
46:37
a little more, a little more buy-in. When I
46:40
said, you're already in here, you're already
46:42
singing, what's one more step? Just shaking
46:44
your butt and acting a little goofy dance. So
46:47
absolutely premeditated. The photographer, videographer
46:49
knew exactly where the action was
46:52
going to be and how to capture it. This is
46:54
kind of important to know. So now
46:56
that I know it's premeditated, is you're
46:58
sitting there designing the entertainment, the arcs,
47:00
the motion, the story, and the engagement
47:02
and the participation. Are
47:05
you doing this by yourself? What's the creative process
47:07
like when you're like, okay, we now have this
47:09
recording, they're gonna do this. How
47:13
do you come up with the idea,
47:15
like let's invite the audience to do this and then let's
47:17
transition to that. And then we're gonna get into the DJ
47:19
set. It's just years of
47:22
experience, intuition, you kicking around with some people and
47:24
like, yeah, yeah, let's do that. And then let's
47:26
do this. I'm a magician. I
47:29
don't know. I tell them, I'll sit on
47:31
this and between
47:33
three and six weeks, the
47:35
pieces will fall together. I don't
47:37
know what, when, how, why. I
47:40
remember one day I was driving down
47:42
the street and we were doing something with a
47:44
wine box presentation and my buddies Leonard wanted to
47:47
do this. They don't drink.
47:49
And I'm driving to meet another couple. I'm
47:52
driving to meet Drew and talk about his wedding. And
47:54
I'm going downtown in my main street in my town.
47:56
And I go, oh my gosh, Leonard. Leonard.
48:00
I call Leonard, I'm like,
48:02
your box is a fishing tackle box. And he's like, of course it is.
48:05
Yes, it is. You're right. I'll get
48:07
on that. And I was
48:09
like, but he's a handyman. So he had it done like within
48:11
the end of the week. So got a decent
48:13
looking tackle box, paid it all wedding
48:16
white. And he's like,
48:18
I'm going to get on that. And
48:21
I'm like, I'm going to get on that. And
48:24
I'm like, I'm going to get on that.
48:26
Decent looking tackle box, paid it all wedding
48:28
white. And we put notes
48:31
in it, locked it up from
48:33
the wedding. So on their fifth anniversary, they
48:36
could open the tackle box, go out
48:38
on a boat, open the tackle box and read
48:40
these notes. Well it's
48:42
just whatever five years later. And
48:46
often, I mean, even a good consultant
48:48
waits, right? So sometimes you know it on the spot,
48:51
but it's a big idea and they need time
48:53
to trust you to come
48:55
around to riding a motorcycle with a wedding dress. How
48:57
do we do that? So I've learned over time, not
48:59
to like hit him in the face right off the
49:01
bat, like, let's build up to the big idea.
49:05
You're in a space where in theory, in
49:08
many cases, not all cases, obviously, there's
49:10
a lot of planning, booking a venue
49:13
and hiring lots of services and vendors.
49:15
So there's, and it's like, in theory,
49:17
if it's done right, you only get married one
49:19
time. It's a big decision. And
49:21
there's a lot riding on this in terms of
49:23
not just your experience, but for your guests, which
49:25
is probably even more important than your experience. You're
49:29
getting commitment upfront. You're asking
49:31
for permission. You're charging
49:35
exponentially more than the next person.
49:37
So at some point, they are explicitly
49:40
giving you permission, like, we trust you,
49:42
man. This is all on you at this
49:44
point, because the idea of some
49:46
surprises sounds pretty cool. Secret surprises.
49:49
It might be on you. It might be for you. We
49:51
don't know. And you're going to have
49:53
to trust me in six or so many months. It
49:56
all comes together. And some parts you'll know about it, and some parts
49:58
you won't. And that's the beauty of what I do. it is that
50:01
you do. And so they buy in on
50:03
that. Where do
50:05
you find resistance in this? And
50:07
how do you get them over that? Or is it immediate like
50:09
this is not going to work? There's really not
50:12
a lot of like interest in
50:14
me trying to figure this out. I'm
50:16
pretty upfront about how I'm different and
50:18
just ask the questions. I talked with
50:20
a couple last night and they really
50:22
wanted a dance part and
50:25
talk about music and can you can you play
50:27
30 seconds and then go into another song and
50:29
then 30 seconds and then go to
50:31
another song. And I was like, you've
50:33
talked to a club DJ. And that works amazingly well
50:35
at a club. I
50:38
think it frustrates families at weddings. I'm
50:40
gonna be straight up honest with you. If that's what you need,
50:42
you think that's important, you probably should go
50:44
with that. I don't like
50:47
the same beat droning on for 20
50:49
minutes while you cut
50:51
in all these different songs. That
50:53
is a personal preference. But if that's what you want, yeah, we
50:55
can do that. But
50:57
we're also going to read the room and I know
51:00
after 10 minutes, they're gonna
51:02
start walking off the floor like, when
51:04
do I take a break? Like when
51:06
do I grab a beverage? Like, I
51:08
haven't had that, that moment to
51:11
just gather myself and not
51:13
talk about music. So sometimes
51:16
I've told a story during class at
51:18
Clemson and two or three years later,
51:20
they go, that resonated. Let's talk
51:22
about what you do. And then that
51:25
opens the door to yeah, definitely different.
51:28
You know, I've had one of my former
51:31
TA's teetered around
51:33
six months going I don't know, I don't
51:35
know. And I'm like, I'm not pressured. You
51:38
can have that thing. And then she went
51:40
to another wedding and was like, okay, I'm done.
51:42
I'm hiring you. Because when
51:45
couples get engaged, the first question, how many
51:47
weddings have you been to? How
51:50
many are you going to before you get married? And
51:53
I had Jennifer with me
51:56
mom, she was going I
51:58
think nine weddings. One was
52:00
her brother, she was in, and then hers was like
52:02
the 11th wedding of the year. And
52:04
I was like, you're going to
52:07
be the best at every wedding when
52:09
you see something wrong or that you
52:11
love, text me any time of day. I
52:13
want written notes. Don't like this,
52:16
like that. I will promise you, if any of
52:18
that stuff happens, you get your money back. It
52:20
will not happen under my walk. And
52:24
that insight into what she
52:26
liked and how to serve her was
52:29
so informative. And it also told
52:31
me a lot of people on
52:33
the mic are not there
52:35
to steal the show. They're there to do shtick. They're
52:39
doing those fill in the blank weddings. The
52:42
couples didn't know, you know, switching the
52:45
speeches, order of that
52:48
creates that flow and that vibe that you
52:50
know you want, or it
52:52
creates some friction. And it's like,
52:54
we don't know what's wrong in the room, but man,
52:57
what if you flip the intros for the bride
52:59
and groom versus the bridal part? Could
53:02
we do something with that? Are
53:04
you okay with that? You
53:07
don't want to throw the guard. Well, if you
53:09
heard the story of why the garter tradition was
53:11
there, you would hate it too. But
53:14
you guys are Clemson football fans. What
53:18
if I get a football signed by Davos Leaning? Oh
53:21
my gosh, Kelly can launch a football. Brent,
53:25
why don't you hike it to her? She'll
53:27
take two or three steps back. We'll put the garter
53:29
around anybody that wants to catch a football
53:32
signed by Davos Sweeney with the garter, get
53:35
on that end of the room. It wasn't single men.
53:37
It was everybody in the room. There were ladies, kids,
53:39
everybody was down there. He launched
53:41
it. She launched it the length of
53:44
the, uh, the room and
53:46
it was awesome. And the person that got the
53:48
football was like, holy moly, I can't believe that
53:50
a football signed by Davos Sweeney. So
53:53
the three ideas has to be
53:56
personal, entertaining, and
53:59
adding. emotion. So it's not,
54:02
I don't come up with any of it. I take the stuff
54:04
they've given me and go, is an audience going to like this?
54:06
How do we make it entertaining? And that
54:08
informs what we might do. It
54:11
created a person who's going to hear this like, Oh,
54:13
you know, they're going to make a thousand reasons why
54:15
they can't do this. Or Paul's got this working for
54:17
him or whatever it is, or they don't have something
54:19
that you have. What I'm trying
54:21
to get into is when
54:24
you need a prospect, let's just call them a
54:26
prospect. Sometimes they're your former students or whatever it
54:28
is, there's
54:30
going to be some resistance to price, to
54:32
structure, to trust, to style, whatever
54:34
it is. The first thing I
54:36
heard you say was, you know what? I'm
54:39
okay not being your guy. So
54:41
you're practicing like, you know what? I'm
54:43
detached from the outcome of this conversation,
54:45
which gives you a strength and authority
54:47
and confidence that I wish more people
54:49
would just exercise. I'm okay with this
54:51
being whoever you want. Next
54:54
is you use the old retreat and follow
54:57
concept from Mr. Blair ends. You
54:59
say, you know, I'm going to be three times as much. It
55:01
may not be right for you. And if you want that, you're
55:03
going to overpay me to do it. I'll
55:05
do it, but you're just going to overpay me to do it.
55:08
And the other thing that you said, and I like this is like you're
55:10
casting or you're the kids would say
55:13
you're throwing shade at what
55:15
other people do by using this term. And I just
55:17
wrote it down so that everybody can use it too.
55:20
Oh, if you just want to fill in the blank branding,
55:22
you just want to fill in the blank website. I'm
55:24
not your person. You've labeled
55:27
the enemy. The enemy in
55:29
this case is like tradition and templates and
55:31
cookie cutter weddings or ceremonies, or whatever it
55:33
is. And so you're asking them
55:35
to make a decision. You want something different. You
55:37
want something memorable. You want something that you're going to be able
55:39
to cherish for the rest of your life. I
55:42
do that, but it comes at a price. Now,
55:44
when you meet somebody that you don't think is a good fit, what
55:47
do you say to them? Say goodbye. I actually
55:49
direct into my, I have a Facebook group
55:52
page, heirloom entertainment.
55:55
And I say, you know what? The things I
55:57
would like to participate in, I post.
56:00
on there. I tell my couples to go there
56:02
and come up with ideas. Whether you use me or not,
56:05
I think those are some great ideas. Look
56:08
over that, see if that fits you. If you want to
56:11
use me or not, there's a bunch of ideas
56:13
and then let them self-select and sometimes they look
56:15
at an idea and go, well, I can do
56:17
that and maybe they
56:19
can and maybe the talent they hire just
56:22
bones it in and goes, well, this is the script
56:24
they gave me to read but
56:26
then they got to work with the camera. It will never
56:28
be as good. I mean, it's
56:31
the choice. Self-serve versus
56:34
I'm guaranteed the result and
56:38
when you let people try to figure it out
56:40
for themselves, sometimes they come back and
56:42
go, you know that thing where you're gonna put me in a
56:45
studio and I'm gonna sing a song for my bride from the
56:47
first dance? That's why
56:49
I'm hiring you. I want
56:51
you to present it in a way. I'm kind
56:54
of introverted. I don't want to steal the spotlight but
56:56
how would we present that? I'm like,
56:58
I got it. I've done it three times. Do
57:01
you want auto-tune? Do you want a
57:03
full-on? Our friend Edwin
57:05
has as a whole studio locally. We can get you
57:07
in there to do a
57:10
professional thing or I have
57:12
a free studio that we can use and my buddy
57:14
Frank, he does auto-tune and we can help you out.
57:17
There's a free-to-fee schedule on
57:19
that idea. I will do that with
57:22
a lot of the bigger ideas depending on
57:24
their budgets and how
57:26
much they want to lean into it. So
57:29
when they're not a good fit, you just send
57:31
them to your Facebook page which is heirloom entertainment
57:33
and their idea is you say use
57:35
any of it, use none of it. Do whatever you need to
57:38
do. I'm here to serve you and if
57:40
you can do it cheaper, if there's a self-serve
57:42
option that works better for you and you don't
57:45
want the full-service package for me, no problem, no
57:47
harm, no foul, go do your thing. So
57:49
you have the confidence and
57:52
the wherewithal to say, you know what? It's not
57:54
everybody's for me. It's totally okay. I
57:56
worked in those weddings in Charleston and
57:58
my soul would die. Because I'm
58:01
like, oh, you know, if those aunts had come up and
58:03
told me at the beginning
58:05
of the night that they do a sing along with
58:07
the groom, and that's a thing their family has always
58:09
done, we could have done that.
58:12
But they came up to me and I had three songs I could
58:14
play because that's what's on the fill-in sheet. And
58:17
I'm like, I'm sorry, we can't do that. That hurts
58:19
me. Why? I'm the sender.
58:22
I shouldn't care. But I would
58:24
see all these moments that were past and that gives
58:26
you the confidence to go, I don't want to be
58:28
there. I'd rather be home with my family. If
58:31
I can't serve in the highest and best, that
58:34
hurts your soul. And the guys I've introduced to this
58:36
that shadowed me go, what? There's
58:39
so much meaning behind it.
58:42
I never thought to do that. Because your mind
58:44
is in music and dancing and that's where
58:46
you've limited. But I will tell you the guys I connect
58:49
with, DJs that
58:51
have a daughter, they hit about mid-40s and
58:55
all of a sudden random
58:57
tears crop up moments of
58:59
pride, grief. You
59:01
get emotional, I didn't know that. There's
59:03
a young punk when you're just trying to
59:05
make girls dance around and dance more in a
59:07
club. You don't
59:09
think about a daughter or making another
59:12
father proud of the first
59:14
significant celebration his family's ever thrown.
59:17
So you're saying this DJ has reached a level of
59:19
maturity and they get involved in the
59:21
story and emotion, not so much like let's just
59:23
get people to jump around. Well,
59:26
you know what would be honest with you? They
59:28
get old and scared. I think they're not relevant. I
59:30
can't rock the house or they see
59:32
me getting gray hair and they think I can't rock
59:34
the house.
59:37
You know what? You're
59:39
behind this big old thing anyway. Nobody's
59:41
really watching you. But
59:44
if you frame the night that
59:46
everyone feels comfortable sober or not to
59:50
act goofy and to celebrate and
59:52
just play, they're going to dance. They
59:56
know this music. It's not like you're
59:59
pulling out obscures. I did do a Nigerian
1:00:01
wedding once because nobody else would do it.
1:00:05
They didn't want American music after we played an hour
1:00:08
of that. I had a scour. I'm like, I can't
1:00:10
be responsible for the lyrics because I don't
1:00:13
want to hear this. But it's
1:00:15
definitely a different thought process. I have so
1:00:17
much to owe to your
1:00:20
guidance and just that translating,
1:00:23
how would I apply this to this
1:00:26
business? I've got a couple businesses. And I
1:00:28
do have a full-time job. So I didn't
1:00:30
have to rely on this. I
1:00:33
need to sell this next wedding to
1:00:35
feed my family. That is
1:00:37
a thing. People
1:00:40
have to create numbers and they're proud
1:00:42
in the industry. I booked 100 weddings
1:00:44
last year. You know what? I'm
1:00:46
happy with 10 or 20 meaningful weekends away
1:00:49
from my family that
1:00:51
also allow me enough to
1:00:56
give my family a first-class experience
1:00:58
the following weekend. I'll
1:01:00
go out to a five-star brunch on a Sunday
1:01:02
or a Saturday or whatever. We
1:01:05
go to Charleston and play for the
1:01:07
weekend. And it's the fun
1:01:09
money. I don't even count
1:01:12
that as our income. It's served
1:01:15
my family. One, the dad
1:01:17
that told me, you made
1:01:19
my family proud tonight, shook
1:01:22
my hand, handed me a
1:01:25
lot of money, went over
1:01:27
to my DJ, Greg, handed
1:01:29
him some money. And
1:01:32
we had done our three things. The dance floor had just
1:01:34
started. And they
1:01:36
were med students. They were gone for nine months.
1:01:38
I'd never really met the parents. Mom showed up
1:01:40
and was like, she says you have this. I
1:01:42
was like, yeah, you're going to have
1:01:44
a great time tonight. I
1:01:47
didn't know what she meant by that. But
1:01:49
she meant there's no wedding planner. This
1:01:51
is on you. This is on the DJ shoulders.
1:01:54
I look over at Greg and I said, how
1:01:56
much did he give me? And
1:01:58
he goes, And
1:02:00
200 is a very generous tip
1:02:03
in our industry because it's just not common.
1:02:05
Often we don't get tips. And
1:02:08
he said, if you, I don't
1:02:10
know, I'll go to the bathroom and tell
1:02:13
the wife whispering, I'm not there. I
1:02:18
walk in the bathroom and
1:02:21
I count $500. Some
1:02:24
DJs charge $700 to serve a family. And
1:02:29
before the dancing even started, that dad gave us
1:02:31
$700. Just
1:02:34
so happens the next day we were going to a Meals
1:02:37
on Wheels fundraiser event. We did
1:02:39
an auction. I bought a painting of
1:02:42
a jazz band, live painting. And
1:02:44
then over on the table was
1:02:47
four passes to Disney and
1:02:50
we bid it up to $500. So
1:02:53
I said, dad, thank you so
1:02:55
much for the tip. I
1:02:57
took it and I donated it to a good cause. And
1:03:01
you're giving my family the gift of Disney. And
1:03:04
we're going to go in six months. Thank
1:03:07
you so much for your generosity. Because
1:03:09
I wanted him to know the gift that he
1:03:11
served my family with and was so generous with
1:03:13
my family. Paul, you know
1:03:15
what I really appreciate in the things that you've
1:03:17
shared so far is that your
1:03:19
job here is to
1:03:22
listen, to dig, and to
1:03:24
find out those quirky traditions. Not the
1:03:26
traditional wedding, but the traditions
1:03:29
that each family has, the quirks and
1:03:31
the idiosyncratic things that they do to
1:03:33
make these things really wonderful
1:03:35
and memorable. And to honor those
1:03:37
celebrations and to tell the stories that need to be
1:03:40
told. And I think that is the
1:03:42
big thing that everybody here can listen to and
1:03:44
take away, which is when you're talking about
1:03:46
designing the brand or identity of a company,
1:03:49
what are their traditions? What makes them unique and different?
1:03:52
How do they celebrate differently? What
1:03:54
are the stories that need to be told? And if you
1:03:56
can encapsulate that in a brand story, you've done
1:03:58
the same thing. so
1:04:00
well is you've created not an
1:04:02
experience you've created memories for people and
1:04:05
there's no price tag that you can put on that. Those
1:04:08
memories will live with each guest and
1:04:11
it might live multiple generations about the thing that
1:04:13
happened at this wedding that you weren't alive for
1:04:15
that I'm going to tell you about now and
1:04:18
I think that's a wonderful gift that you're sharing with the world.
1:04:21
So another story you want to tell me? All of them.
1:04:25
Let's pick one. Let's pick one. The one
1:04:27
that stands out because I think sometimes when
1:04:29
we hear three stories we can
1:04:31
spot the pattern. It'll
1:04:34
be a little easier like okay I get it now. Maybe the
1:04:36
first two they're like wow this is pretty genius I don't know
1:04:38
how to do this. Okay the names
1:04:40
will come to me in in the middle of the
1:04:42
story and again often
1:04:44
it's one
1:04:46
of the couple has taken
1:04:48
my class built some report and the other
1:04:51
one is clug. So when
1:04:53
they come in and design sessions
1:04:55
this discovery is always try
1:04:58
to do at my kitchen table. Try to
1:05:00
have a meal. Tell them it's going to be 90
1:05:02
minutes or maybe three hours. I don't know. The first
1:05:05
initial meeting might be on zoom if they're
1:05:07
if they're not local. We've done everything on
1:05:09
zoom but they come in we start talking
1:05:11
just building a report and
1:05:13
start talking about how
1:05:16
we might help them and what the normal
1:05:18
wedding looks like and it says
1:05:20
what is the dance going to look like with your mom? Are
1:05:22
you a mama's boy? And
1:05:24
oh my gosh my
1:05:28
brother got married two years
1:05:30
ago and he danced to her favorite song. Bill Collins in
1:05:32
the Jungle Book. He already danced tonight.
1:05:35
I don't know what song I'm going to choose and
1:05:38
I said okay I
1:05:40
know right then. Got the answer for
1:05:42
it and we
1:05:44
have the meeting. I
1:05:46
circle back and I said
1:05:48
let's go back to this idea of you dancing with your mom. We
1:05:51
are going to play her favorite
1:05:53
song and we're going to play
1:05:55
her favorite version of that song. And
1:06:01
he's like, yeah, my brother
1:06:03
already did that. And
1:06:07
looks at me and I'm like, no, but she hasn't heard
1:06:09
her favorite version and neither have you. And
1:06:12
he looks at Julie and she's just
1:06:14
glowing ear to ear. And
1:06:17
he's like, do you know what
1:06:19
he's saying? She's like, no,
1:06:22
but it's going to be good. I
1:06:25
thought she knew the answer. I said,
1:06:28
OK, let's rewatch. You
1:06:30
told me the story of your first date. You
1:06:33
guys did a thing together. You
1:06:36
told me the first time you went to Myrtle Beach
1:06:38
and you guys walked in the ocean. You proposed. You
1:06:41
did a thing together. You
1:06:44
drove up here 90 minutes from Columbia today and
1:06:46
in the car on the way here, you did a
1:06:48
thing together. You were telling me as you came in
1:06:50
through the garage to sit right here. What?
1:06:54
You're a singer. When it gets you in a
1:06:56
studio and you're going to sing that song.
1:06:59
And every mother say you're going to do that to
1:07:01
her. And his reaction was my
1:07:04
brother. That's great. My brother's going to hate
1:07:06
me. This is so bad. He's got a
1:07:08
twin brother. So
1:07:12
maybe a month later, he comes over. We set up
1:07:14
a studio in our house. We do a little auto
1:07:16
tune. I present it at
1:07:19
the wedding and just say, mom, we're going to
1:07:21
play your favorite song. We know your son did
1:07:23
the Phil Collins version. But this is
1:07:25
going to be your favorite version. And even
1:07:27
he hasn't heard it. So I wouldn't let him
1:07:29
listen to his own work to over critique it
1:07:31
before the moment. I want him to be
1:07:33
all about his mom, not about. Did
1:07:36
this recording sound amazing? So I wouldn't let him listen to
1:07:38
it. And
1:07:41
mom was a little bit confused when she was caught
1:07:43
up in the moment. She's dancing with him for 30
1:07:45
seconds. I tell the photographer's word against the awkward to
1:07:47
get. She pulls away and goes. You
1:07:51
anything? She
1:07:54
buries her head. Her shoulders
1:07:56
start shaking. They are happy tears.
1:08:00
And I get done with the song.
1:08:02
I look over at the brother and I was like, I told you
1:08:04
I was going to get you. So
1:08:07
after they're done dancing, I go, mom, was
1:08:10
that your favorite version? And she's like, absolutely. And
1:08:13
I said, no, some people don't know who
1:08:15
the artist was that sang that. Would
1:08:18
you tell him, that was my son. He recorded
1:08:20
that for me. And collectively the whole room goes,
1:08:24
ah, that vulnerability,
1:08:26
that he was glowing.
1:08:29
The brother was in awe.
1:08:32
Like, I cannot believe you did this. This
1:08:34
was really great. And nobody
1:08:37
was focused on was this not Bill Collins, was
1:08:39
this not the perfect version? It was for her
1:08:41
mom. What a better way
1:08:43
to honor her. And then
1:08:46
have that, you know, every mother's day like, hey, here's,
1:08:49
here's that recording my son did. That
1:08:52
was the most meaningful version. That's the
1:08:54
difference. It might not have been
1:08:56
the most perfect, but it was the most meaningful
1:08:58
because it was done with love and from someone
1:09:01
that you care about. Yeah, I've
1:09:03
done that before. And it's always
1:09:05
like, it doesn't matter. It could be karaoke.
1:09:08
Now, the audience is not going to get it until they get
1:09:10
it, but we'll have the reveal late. I
1:09:13
had a dad do a voiceover daughter and
1:09:15
an instrumental part of that. He was in
1:09:18
video production. When I said voiceover, he
1:09:20
was like, his eyes lit up. What would that look like?
1:09:22
I was like, go in the studio. Talk
1:09:25
for eight minutes and send it to me. I
1:09:27
think he talked for 12. I was like, tell
1:09:29
me your favorite moment with your daughter, the most fun moment,
1:09:31
the most memorable moment. He gushed
1:09:33
on and on for, for, for 12 minutes.
1:09:36
I used less than 12 seconds. Just put
1:09:38
stuff in the instrumental. She was in happy
1:09:40
tears. I waited, I think
1:09:42
it was her first or second anniversary. And then I sent
1:09:44
her the full 12 minutes. I actually might've sent
1:09:46
it to him on Bob's day. And
1:09:49
then I said, by the way, you don't know. There's
1:09:51
another here for you. Listen to
1:09:54
this. This is your dad glowing about
1:09:56
how proud he is. What
1:09:59
daughter does it? want that. But
1:10:01
I think the time in between made
1:10:04
it a little bit more significant because it wasn't all bundled
1:10:06
up in that one idea. It was another
1:10:08
memory that was pre
1:10:11
post, you know, B roll, but but
1:10:13
what and who
1:10:16
doesn't want to hear their parent gush
1:10:18
about on audio for the rest of their lives, you
1:10:20
know, share that with their children. We
1:10:24
have tools, man. We're
1:10:26
not being used. I'm starting
1:10:28
to get a theme from you that there's a
1:10:30
little bit of a mischievous boy inside of you
1:10:33
that you like to tease people a little bit like you
1:10:36
like to give them a little bit information, get them lenient
1:10:38
like but wait, there's
1:10:41
more that you
1:10:43
like to like send little surprises, there's a
1:10:45
little Easter egg that you may or may
1:10:47
not know that's coming that lives beyond the
1:10:49
service in which some of these hired you
1:10:51
for that there's a lot
1:10:53
of thoughtful intentionality behind the things that you do. And
1:10:57
I think that's a great way for us and this episode
1:10:59
to ask all of our listeners to to do something.
1:11:01
I don't normally do this, but I'm going to make
1:11:04
a habit of doing this more often. We'll
1:11:06
listen to things we watch videos, but
1:11:08
then we're inspired, but we don't do
1:11:10
anything. So I'm going to ask
1:11:12
you right now every every person who's watching or listening to
1:11:14
this, take a moment reflect
1:11:17
on the stories. Think
1:11:19
about the one light bulb moment for you. And
1:11:23
then write that down. And
1:11:26
then think and ask yourself how might I
1:11:28
apply this in my line of work to
1:11:31
create these memories for my clients and people I
1:11:33
serve. What's one
1:11:36
thing I could do differently about how I approach
1:11:38
sales, or how I might
1:11:40
become detached from the outcome? What
1:11:43
is one thing I can do after the service has
1:11:45
been paid for that I can do to deliver the
1:11:47
light commit to just
1:11:49
one thing and
1:11:52
then create a plan of attack. What is your plan?
1:11:54
Like how will I implement this and
1:11:56
then do it in the next week? In
1:11:58
that way, We can carry
1:12:01
the lessons and the stories but we can
1:12:03
actually improve our lives on our business And
1:12:05
that's what I want you to do. So you can commit
1:12:07
to that. I Think you
1:12:09
have a bright future ahead of you and on that note Paul
1:12:12
It's been a pleasure talking to you and
1:12:14
for people who don't know Paul and I
1:12:16
were strangers We went on a fishing trip
1:12:18
at at Oles in British Columbia
1:12:20
and we're gonna do it again come
1:12:23
September. So I look forward to Hearing
1:12:25
your line scream their your real stream and
1:12:27
seeing who's who's brought in the bigger fish
1:12:31
Small fish dough Get
1:12:33
some bait. It's in it's in make this That
1:12:38
did happen you did catch the larger you love our
1:12:40
I did catch the largest We
1:12:47
can't always control with gifts on the line Paul
1:12:49
it's been a pleasure. Thanks for doing this.
1:12:52
Thanks for pouring into us. Thank you, sir.
1:12:55
Thank you It was an honor. I have
1:12:57
gone from not knowing you just admiring you
1:12:59
from afar to building a great friendship. Thank
1:13:01
you it's been an honor to
1:13:03
share my story, I love telling them and I Have
1:13:08
notes from how I might serve you and your family
1:13:10
at your son's wedding that I gleaned over
1:13:12
last August. I I Put
1:13:14
these nuggets back and just in case they're used one
1:13:16
day. You never know. I want
1:13:18
to encourage you to do something to
1:13:21
perhaps do some Consulting
1:13:23
outside of your industry to
1:13:26
teach people how if
1:13:29
they're if they sell donuts or if
1:13:31
they're retail store selling clothing how they
1:13:33
can create these memorable experiences Big
1:13:36
and small ideas. I would encourage
1:13:38
you to do that I would also like
1:13:40
to challenge you a little bit in Going
1:13:43
out there and giving your version of a TED
1:13:45
talk and using the tools and techniques To
1:13:47
bring your audience into it and getting them to
1:13:49
participate. That would be something to behold I
1:13:52
don't know if you've already done that but that's a challenge. I'm
1:13:54
thrown out at you I spoke at a
1:13:56
DJ convention and there was crickets. So maybe maybe
1:13:58
there's an audience out there there, but the
1:14:01
music guys definitely didn't resonate.
1:14:04
So we'll see. I like that
1:14:06
challenge. I really do. If you've enjoyed this
1:14:09
conversation and you like the weird mind that
1:14:11
is Paul, and you think your
1:14:14
business and your service can use the breath
1:14:16
fresh air, worth the risk.
1:14:19
Worth the risk, give Paul a call and
1:14:21
see what he can do for you. So Paul, people
1:14:23
are curious about you and want to enlist
1:14:26
you in helping them to think differently to break out
1:14:28
of their box, to come up with
1:14:30
something that's never been done before in their line
1:14:32
of work. How might they find you? I
1:14:35
have a couple of different businesses. So
1:14:37
the easiest way would be the Facebook
1:14:39
page that we already referred to, heirloom
1:14:41
entertainment. And if you can't spell heirloom,
1:14:44
somebody said it's going to be a problem. You're probably not
1:14:46
my client. Like
1:14:50
the tomato, everybody. There's a silent H in that.
1:14:52
That is two things. Only thing I noticed in
1:14:54
heirloom is the tomato. And I'm like, you're not
1:14:56
my client. If you don't know how to spell
1:14:58
it, you think it's a tomato, you're not my
1:15:00
client. But these, what I wanted
1:15:02
to create was heirloom memories, was heirloom
1:15:04
video, audio. So yeah, heirloom entertainment on
1:15:07
Facebook, message me through there, read some
1:15:09
ideas. If I'm not in
1:15:11
your part of the world, then I can come and help,
1:15:13
which I do love travel. So I would absolutely come help.
1:15:16
Yeah, all right. Paul, thank you very much.
1:15:18
Thanks, buddy. I appreciate it. And I look forward
1:15:20
to seeing you in September on the boat. Hi,
1:15:24
this is Paul Hoke. And you
1:15:26
are listening to The Future. Thanks
1:15:34
for joining us. If you
1:15:36
haven't already, subscribe to our show on your
1:15:38
favorite podcasting app and get new insightful episodes
1:15:40
from us every week. The
1:15:43
Future podcast is hosted by Chris Do
1:15:45
and produced and edited by Rich Cardona
1:15:47
Media. Thank you to Adam
1:15:49
Sanborn for her intro music. If
1:15:53
you enjoyed this episode, then do us a favor
1:15:55
by reviewing and rating our show on Apple Podcast.
1:15:59
It will help us grow the show. and make future episodes
1:16:01
that much better. If
1:16:04
you'd like to support the show and
1:16:06
invest in yourself while you're at it,
1:16:08
visit thefuture.com and you'll find video courses,
1:16:11
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1:16:13
resources about design and the creative business.
1:16:15
Thanks again for listening and we'll see you next time.
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